Thunderstruck

Chapter Eight

"Oh, she's a little runaway
Daddy's girl learned fast all the things he couldn't say."

Runaway, Bon Jovi


Ned was already in a foul mood for a Sunday. With no discernable cause for his irritation, he rose early to enjoy some peace and quiet with the morning newspaper and a cup of coffee. His lips barely touched the edge of his mug before the phone rang loudly at precisely eight o'clock on the dot. The shrill sound carried through the house, only irritating him further. Who the hell would be calling so early on a Sunday morning? Who in their right mind, beside himself, was up and moving at this hour? With the family still sound asleep, Ned hurried towards his office, coffee sloshing out of his mug as he went, each splatter met with a colorful word seethed beneath his breath.

When his bare foot landed on one of Rickon's Legos, he yelped out in pain and hobbled along towards the phone. His face was undoubtedly the same shade of cherry red as the godforsaken piece of plastic embedded in his foot. If the family were churchgoing folk, perhaps he'd have some godly inspiration towards patience. The Starks were not and Ned lost his patience by the time he snatched up the phone from its cradle.

The curt greeting he had intended to breath into the speaker died on his lips when he heard the sound of Sansa's voice coming through. She had apparently gotten to the phone faster than him and sleepily conversed with someone on the other end.

"Did I wake you?"

What he expected was a telemarketer soliciting money for one thing or another. Or perhaps even Mr. Hardyng calling to apologize about being an insufferable prick and polishing off the last of Ned's good whiskey.

Instead, it was a deep, grumbling voice and an odd question for a stranger to be asking. He could only hope that Sansa knew this individual. The reassurance from that thought fled quickly enough. After all, this wasn't the voice of some boy a few years past puberty. It was a man she was talking to - a man asking if he had woken her. Ned stilled and pulled the speaker away from his lips so that his breathing wouldn't travel through line.

"Mmm, maybe," he heard his daughter sigh into the phone sweetly. He settled against the edge of his desk and pressed the phone harder against his ear though he could hear just fine.

"You sound sexy in the morning."

The man spoke again, but this time with a lewd chuckle. Ned felt his blood pressure rise and his body stiffen. He knew that laugh and he could almost imagine the shit-eating grin likely on this guy's face. His fingers curled against his palm and for a moment he thought to say something into the phone.

"Is that right?" Sansa cooed back.

Ned was stunned into silence. The whole situation was equally infuriating and shocking. Since when did his baby girl humor this sort of crap? Furthermore, since when did she start associating with grown men. And why did this moron have the nerve to call up in the first place?

"Yeah," the man laughed once more. "I can't stop thinking about last night," he spoke after the cadence of silence.

What the hell does that mean? What happened last night? Quietly as he could manage, Ned covered the speaker of the phone with his hand and let out a sigh. He wanted to jump out of his skin. He wanted to tell this punk that if he knew what was good for him, he'd never call this phone number again. He wanted to run up the stairs and rip the phone in Sansa's room right out of the wall.

"Me neither. I had an amazing time," Sansa replied near breathlessly.

Ned could see her now - all starry-eyed and smitten, floating on cloud nine. He had seen this before in her when she started dating Joffrey. It broke his heart to see his daughter suffer through the disenchantment of that shitty relationship.

"And you'll never believe what I did when I got home!" Sansa continued gleefully.

Oh dear God.

Ned felt his face flush red in anger and mortification. If he hung up the phone now, he wouldn't have to hear this. He could pretend that perhaps Sansa and this…man…played a nice game of Parcheesi last night. Or maybe they had a riveting discussion about Reaganomics. Then again, he didn't know what was worse – his daughter canoodling with a grown man or becoming a staunch Republican supporter.

"What?" the man egged on, lasciviousness pouring through the phone and making Ned literally sick to the stomach.

"Mmm, it has to do with me, naked in my bed and the poster hanging above my sister's bed."

Ned braced himself against the desk, breathing heavily and shaking his head. A stack of folders careened off the desk and onto the floor with a heavy plop. He winced at the sound, hoping it hadn't carried through the speaker still pressed against his palm.

"Fuck," the man veritably groaned into the phone. "Goddamn, that's hot. I can't wait to get you alone again. The things I'm going to do to you, girl."

Oh my God! No. Oh lord.

Unwittingly, Ned began to pace in front of the desk. He wanted to hang up. He had heard enough, but the jerk called his damn house for heaven's sake! It was his God-given right as the man who paid an arm and leg for the girls to have a phone line in their room to hear what this fool had to say to his sweet girl.

"Oh yeah? And what exactly do you plan to do?"

He had never heard Sansa talk like this. God! But why would he? To him, she was sweet Sansa - soft-spoken, diligent in her studies, kind and respectful.

No. Not my innocent girl! This middle-aged loser is corrupting her!

"Well, I had planned on licking that sweet…"

Worked up into a frenzy, Ned spun on his heel. As he lunged forward to continue his pacing, he slammed hard into his wife who had somehow manifested in front of him.

"What are you doing?" Catelyn screeched in bewilderment as she lost her balance and stumbled into the desk.

"Shhh!" Ned hissed, waving his hand frantically to quiet his wife.

"…until you scream for more."

"Who is it?" Cat demanded firmly, rubbing her hip with a small wincing of pain.

"Not now! I'm busy!" Once more, he tried to shoo Cat away and gently nudge her towards the kitchen.

"Ned, give me the phone," his wife insisted.

Her demand was accompanied by the look. One hand was firmly planted on her hip and with her head cocked to the side, she held her other hand out for the phone. He had been married to her long enough to understand that this woman would not back down once she donned the look.

"No!" Ned insisted, nonetheless. He was being obstinate and he knew it. So did she, but he dodged Catelyn anyway, bobbing away from her as she tried to grab for the phone. In zigzags, she chased him around the room until the phone cord was stretched to its limit.

"You're at work today?" Ned heard Sansa inquire brightly. He listened carefully to his daughter's conversation as he staved off Cat who kept lunging forward to snatch the phone.

"Yeah, I'm picking up some extra hours to help Selmy out. I'm calling to let you know that I had to order a part for your car. I probably wont have it ready until Wednesday, maybe Thursday."

Ned stopped. Dead in his tracks, he halted and so too did Catelyn. Him! The mechanic.

"Put the phone down, Ned!" Catelyn drew out her words, but not before marking each heavily at the end. It was her way of weaving fierceness into her voice.

"That's fine. I was hoping to see you sooner though," Sansa replied with a disappointed sigh.

"I'll be heading through Evanston tomorrow. Maybe I can come see-"

Distracted and out of breath, Ned had only noticed the phone being pulled away from his ear at the last moment.

"Cat! Stop! No, no. I just want-" he whispered frantically as he tried to grab for the phone.

"What has gotten into you? Who was that?" Catelyn demanded after replacing the phone to its cradle.

"You! I! You should…"

Scrambling for an explanation, Ned came up empty handed. What exactly did he need to explain? He wasn't the one having illicit conversations over the phone.

"Well?" Catelyn pressed. She wouldn't be letting him off the hook. That much was clear as she inched forward.

"You should have heard the things Sansa was saying to…to…this…guy. No! Man. A full-grown man! Not just some boy her own age."

Whatever shock and horror he hoped might grip Catelyn at this bit of information was replaced with a pointed look launched in his direction. Arms crossed about her chest, foot tapping on the floor, his wife pursed her lips as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"You were eavesdropping, Ned," she tried to reason.

In the end, he would ultimately admit she was right. A few hours would go by and he'd have to hang his head to seek her out, mumble out how she knew better all along and he should have listened to her. After all, that seemed to be the arrangement he signed up for in marrying her. He wouldn't have it any other way, but in this moment he needed to make her understand. The man they invited into their home and fed at their own table was a pervert out to corrupt their daughter.

"I had to! I meant to put the phone down, but…I just…" Once more, he fumbled over his words gracelessly.

"You just what?" Catelyn continued to push and she wouldn't stop until he admitted his wrongdoing. But stubborn though she was, so was he.

"I have an obligation as her father to make sure that she doesn't…you know…"

God, just quit while you're ahead.

"That she doesn't talk to a member of the opposite sex?" Catelyn wrapped her arms around Ned's middle. Her lips curled into a soft smile as she stared up at him knowingly. He never knew what it was that curbed the fierceness and replaced it with dotting affection.

"The things they were saying," Ned shook his head as he spoke. He wouldn't dare relay them. They were bad enough to hear, let alone repeat. "She was with this man last night."

"Arya said she was with Margaery last night, something for the sorority."

As it stood, Ned could barely keep track of his own schedule, let alone all six of his children. When Sansa had mysteriously disappeared last night, Ned didn't find it so hard to believe that he had simply forgotten some sorority activity she had already scheduled. Cat had looked just as befuddled at the information, which, in hindsight, was an oddity. The woman had a near-inhuman ability to keep every family member's schedule straight. Statistics would dictate she was bound to forget something every so often and, every so often, she did forget a soccer practice, PTA meeting, or something of the like. Cat had merely shrugged as Arya nonchalantly explained that Sansa had some "airhead gathering," as she called it, to go to.

"She wasn't!" Ned insisted - whipped up into a tizzy once more at the realization he had been duped by his own daughters. "This…guy...this man guy…she was with him!"

"Maybe he was over at Margaery's too. Did you think about that?" Cat reasoned calmly.

Ned abruptly freed himself from his wife's arms, shrugging her off as he bounded towards the stairs.

"I have to handle this!" he insisted.

"Here we go," he heard Cat mumble at the bottom of the stairs. It didn't matter. She could patronize all she wanted, but he was going to get to the bottom of this come hell or high water. Ned took his steps two at a time before hurdling down the hallway. He didn't bother to knock on his daughters' door, but instead unceremoniously burst into the room – a cardinal sin for the father of two teenage girls.

He had hoped to find Sansa still on the phone with San-dork or whatever the chump's name was. To his supreme disappointment, she had hung up the phone and was curled up in her bed, facing the door with a smile on her lips.

Both of the girls popped up immediately at the intrusion. Arya rubbed her eyes and blinked in confusion, obviously still sound asleep prior to him barreling into the room.

"Out of bed!" Ned demanded firmly. It wasn't often he shouted at his kids and even now he tried in earnest to keep his voice down. "Both of you. Downstairs, now."

He didn't wait for the girls to get up, but instead headed down the stairs and into the living room. Cat had settled into the recliner, her feet pulled up onto the chair as she cradled a coffee cup in her hands. Ned paced for what felt like an eternity. Cat stared at him as if he might burn holes in the carpet the way he was walking back and forth. Eventually, the girls ambled into the room and plopped down on the couch, one right next to the other.

"Where were you last night?" he questioned curtly as he stared at Sansa. Hands settled on his hips, Ned continued to pace as he awaited an answer.

Sansa was a terrible liar. It was a running joke in the family. Of all his children, she was the worst at it. He watched his daughter's eyes grow wide and fill with panic before her mouth fell open to speak.

"Dad, I told you. She was at Margaery's," Arya spoke on behalf of Sansa. The two momentarily exchanged glances.

"You pipe down! Sansa, where were you?"

"I was…like she says. I was at Margaery's." Like clockwork, Sansa faltered. Her voice caught in her throat and her face went red as she frantically shifted her stare to Catelyn.

"You ran out on your mother's dinner party and that was bad enough!" Ned began. "Now you've got your sister lying for you. Who was the man you were talking to?"

"What man?" Sansa questioned indignantly. Suddenly, the understanding bloomed across her face, which deepened to a darker shade of red. "Wait, you were listening in on my phone call?"

"I happened to pick up the phone and I heard a few things," Ned admitted. The conversation was already uncomfortable enough without rehashing the finer details.

"Why were you listening in on my phone call?" Sansa insisted angrily as she scooted to the edge of the couch.

"That's not the point. The point is I've had enough of you two going around all over town with these guys who are up to no good. Between Arya sneaking out to go do god-knows-what and you gallivanting with some guy last night!"

Ned's voice rose with his own anger. He never knew Sansa to be like this. He always expected a battle of wills with Arya, who shared his stubbornness. He never imagined to have it out like this with Sansa, though.

"I wasn't gallivanting. It's called a date." Sansa drew in a deep breath, lifting her chin up as she matched her eyes to his. Ned realized only then that he had stopped pacing. "Yeah, I was on a date," Sansa affirmed once more. "So sue me!"

Ned felt his jaw drop. Whipping his head around to Cat, his wife too seemed floored by Sansa's sudden brazenness.

"I don't know what's gotten into the two of you," Ned began again, pointing at each of his daughters in turn. "We need to talk about this. About you two and your…activities…with these men you keep seeing."

"Activities? They just went on a date, Dad! Chill!" Arya interrupted with a roll of the eyes.

"No, I will not chill!" Ned cried out. "I was a young man once. I know how men are, especially with beautiful girls. You're both young and pretty and these men will take advantage of that. Now, if you have…you know, when you do…" Ned ran a hand over his face with a deep sigh before starting again. "When you have…"

Somehow he couldn't manage the words. He had had this conversation with Robb and Jon and never remembered it being this damn hard. If anything, it should be easier the second time around, but somehow Ned felt himself growing increasingly enraged at the idea of any guy doing those…things…with his daughters.

"Sex. When you have sex," Cat sighed, shaking her head at the disaster this conversation had turned into.

"You need to be responsible!" Ned's outburst seemed to have come from nowhere. There was so much more he needed to tell them, to warn them of, but it was all he could manage to say without the words vanishing on his tongue.

The room was engulfed in an awkward silence, everyone avoiding each other's stares as best they could.

"Wait, is this a sex talk?" Arya questioned disbelievingly. "Oh my god!" Slumping back against the couch, she buried her face in her hands, her voice a mumbled groan. Pulling her hands from her face, she shot Ned the look. It was the same cocking of the head to the side and the same pointed look he so often got from his wife. "You're trying to have a sex talk with us and you can't even say the word sex!"

"Arya, stop," Ned sighed as he closed his eyes. The wherewithal to have this conversation had fled him now.

"Did you let the Hound nail you?" Arya inquired with a devilish smile as she turned towards Sansa. "Is that what this is about?"

"Arya!" Sansa chided with a swat to her sister's arm.

"What? It's apparently what everyone wants to know," Arya shrugged before elbowing Sansa playfully. "So did you? Is his shlong huge?"

"Eww!"

The outburst came from behind him and Ned spun around to find Bran and Rickon standing in the doorway of the living room. Nose crinkled in disgust, Bran shook his head while Rickon erupted into giggles, though Ned hoped against hope that his youngest didn't quite know what he was laughing at.

As a father, this was a waking nightmare; the kind no one talks about in regards to parenthood. No one ever warned him that this day would come; the day when he would have to have these conversations and the potential that he might fail miserably at them as he was now.

"Bran, go in the kitchen with your brother!" Ned snapped impatiently.

"Why aren't you having this talk with Bran? In a few years he'll be Arya's age," Sansa huffed before Ned could speak again and end the conversation. "Will you listen in on his phone conversations too?"

"You're both grounded," Ned scolded, eying each of his daughters and hoping he conveyed his disappointment in them. "No more sneaking out, no more covering for one another. That's it. You'll both come home right after school, no going out on the weekends."

"Fine." Sansa shot up from the couch and calmly smoothed down the front of her bathrobe. "I'm moving out next weekend anyway so it doesn't matter," she added as she brushed past him and sashayed towards the stairs in movements graceful despite her anger. Sharing in her sister's anger, but not so much of her grace, Arya stomped from the room, fuming as she went.

"Yeah, maybe I'll move out too!" she shouted as she trailed after Sansa.

"You will do no such thing!" Ned called out. "Now go to your room!" he added for good measure.

"I was going there anyway!" Arya fired back.

"Good! And take down your posters when you get up there!"

Tit for tat, they would go. Arya craved having the last word as much as Ned did. It seemed for now he would have the final say on the matter and couldn't help but find satisfaction in this. His lips tugged into a relieved smile before Sansa shouted from the top of the stairs.

"And to answer the question, his shlong was huge!"


A/N:

I apologize for taking forever and a day to update this. I cannot thank you enough for all the support for this fic. It means a lot to me and your comments are all so very much appreciated.

The last few chapters were longer than I intended so I'd like to stick to shorter chapters and more frequent updates. I wanted to get this update out to diffuse a bit of the devastation of my last Gods & Monsters update so this is not beta'ed.

I hope you enjoyed :) I promise more SanSan interactions in the next chapter...