Betad by Kitchmill
8
"Coffee?" he offers.
"Um, sure." I sit on the edge of the sofa and try to arrange the flattened cookies so they look more appetizing.
"Cream and sugar," he says, setting the steaming mug on the table in front of me.
"You remembered. Thanks."
We sit in awkward silence, the only sounds in the room are chewing and sipping.
"These are good."
"Thanks. They taste better than they look." I shrug. "Sorry about the mess in the hall."
He nods, grabbing another cookie and shoving it in his mouth. I miss that mouth.
"Edward," I start. "I'm sorry." I pause, searching for the right words. "I freaked. I didn't want the kids to find out that way. What was I supposed to say, anyway? 'Rose, I'm having sex with your teacher, your boyfriend's dad?' I just didn't want the last month with Rose to be uncomfortable or all about you and I." The words coming out of my mouth even sound lame to me.
"After all we had, all we were," he says, looking down and shaking his head. "I didn't think you'd discount that, deny us. It really hurt. I thought we understood each other. We were going to keep it a secret until they graduated and I was no longer Rose's teacher. And then we pushed it back to telling them during our vacation, and then...you know what happened next," he finishes, finally looking me in the eye. I almost gasp, realizing I haven't looked in those eyes for more than a month, and the emotions I see send a dagger directly to my heart.
I look down at my hands wringing in my lap. My eyes fill with tears just knowing I've hurt him, that I've let him down. I've let all of us down. "I'm sorry. I panicked. I realized that I only had one more month with Rose, and I didn't want to share it, or deal with the repercussions if they were opposed to us." I motion between he and I. "I didn't want anything to take away from my time with her. It was selfish and wrong and inexcusable." I take a deep breath and sit up straighter, trying to be strong. "I don't expect you to forgive me. What you and I had was amazing. You made me feel special, beautiful. No one has made me feel the way you did. But we're adults here and our kids are together and in love. We are going to be in each other's lives for a long time. So can we find a way to make peace with this? For the kids?" I quickly wipe the tears that escaped before looking up at him again.
He's staring off into space, the crinkly in his brow he gets when he's deep in thought. I wait for a minute or two. When I realize he's not going to respond. I gather my plate, mumble a thanks and get out of there as fast as I can. The tears are flowing by the time I reach my apartment, and sobs escape before the front door is closed behind me. I set the plate down on the nearest flat surface and go bury myself in my bed. The bed that will forever remind me of him and our wonderful, secret affair...until next time.
A/N
Um...did she just say 'Edward'?
Most of you already figured that out :)
A few of you are annoyed with Bella. Did she explain herself enough?
Thanks for the love guys.
