Don't Wake Me Up

Chapter Eight: The Upward Turn

Without even thinking, I pulled Anna into my arms.

"I'm-so-sorry-" she cried out through hyperventilated breaths as she sobbed into my shoulder. I swear I could see the walls she had out up against the outside world start to crumble away.

I felt tears of joy begin to flow silently down my face and I closed my eyes. "Shhhhh, Anna. Its ok, sweetie. It's ok." I ran my fingers through her hair in comfort and I felt her shake in my embrace.

My breathing got heavier as I became very aware of the curve of Anna's chest against mine. She wrapped her arms tightly around my waist and pulled me closer, causing air to hitch violently in my throat. The proximity was bringing warmth to my face and I felt my cheeks begin to tingle.

"I'm going to let you two do some...talking." Kristoff said. "I'll be getting some coffee."

As soon as he was gone, Anna pulled me the rest of the way into the room, causing me to stumble in after her and almost hit my head on the doorway. She caught me mid trip, though, and guided my stature back up to eye-level.

"Whoa there, Feisty-pants!" I exclaimed, bursting into giggles. She laughed through her tears and sniffled. "I think you should sit down before we both end up on the floor."

She nodded and grabbed my hand, encouraging me to climb onto the bed and sit cross-legged beside her. We leaned our backs against the wall and I swiveled my head to face her, feeling the stucco press against my temple.

"Do you really remember everything?" I asked, not even trying to conceal the copious amount of hope in my voice. She dragged her sleeve across her eyes and turned her head so that our noses were only about a foot apart.

"I know about everything you told me- the Leukemia, and your parents, and the books! Oh those books."

"What is that supposed to mean?!" I smiled, raising my eyebrows in exasperation. I really didn't care that she was poking fun at my taste in reading, I was more focused on the changes I was noticing in her.

Her tone, instead of defensive, was now excited and caring. Her body movements changed from boxy and uncomfortable to fluid and over exaggerated. Even her eyes, once a frozen, piercing blue, now looked more like they consisted of swirling, tropical pools of warm water.

"Let's just say I prefer Dr. Seuss to Jane Austen," she said as she flashed me a saucy grin.

It was hard to focus on her words when my face was flushing into the color of a freaking tomato.

"Are you ok? You're all red!" She exclaimed, dimples curling further into her cheeks.

It's just the fact that you are so close to me. And so beautiful. That took me a lot of effort not to say. "I never thought you would remember. I'm just so happy. I can't even believe this is happening." Which, you know, was half of the truth.

"I don't even think I could ever say sorry to you enough times. Or ever apologize until everything is okay. You were so selflessly kind to me. You have been through so much."

"Are you kidding me? My backlash has been eating at me like nothing else. I'm the one who should feel bad. After all, you have been through more than I have. You being defensive is acceptable at least."

"Elsa. I don't even- I don't know what to say. Even now you show me greater care than anyone ever has. I don't even know if I can ever do enough in one lifetime to repay you." The water works were back on for both of us.

Not even able to answer, I just grabbed her again, listening to the steady and calming sound of her breathing. She trailed her nails lightly against the bare skin of the back of my neck and I shivered. This is surreal. My face was starting to hurt from smiling so much.

"You have plenty of time to repay me, not that you even need to!" I whispered, melting into our hug. "I'm not going anywhere."

And I held her steadfast.

...

When I returned to my mind, it felt like I was lying on downy pillows in a hot spring. I had never been more comfortable in my entire life. I knew that I should open my eyes and get up, but I gave into temptation and kept them shut, snuggling in closer.

I wasn't sure why I was wrapped up in fluffy warmth, as the hospital was usually kept at the shockingly frigid temperature of an icebox. I didn't question it though and sighed happily.

"Mmmmm." I heard a husky moan in my right ear and my eyes shot open in shock. I was not alone in this bed. In fact, as my mind gathered in my surroundings and my groggy vision cleared, I saw that I was tangled up in someone else's limbs.

Anna.

Her arms were wrapped around my core and her head rested in the crook of my neck, breath tickling my collar bone. Careful not to induce an awkward wake up, I carefully withdrew myself from her and sat up, heart pounding.

Apparently we had tuckered ourselves out with the emotional binge and fallen asleep in each other's arms.

Quite the turnaround from the day before, if you asked me. We had gone from screaming to spooning within twelve hours. Not that I really minded, though. This was much nicer.

"Don't wake me up." She mumbled and rolled over, making a grasp for more sheets to cocoon her body in. I stole a moment to admire her. She looked more alive now, out of the coma. There was more color in her skin and more energy in every tiny movement she made. Even when she was sleeping.

A soft knock on the door pulled me from my stupor. Anna just moaned again and yanked the pillow over her head. Even through blankets and a baggy hospital gown, I could see her lithe and thin muscled legs kick around in protest at the noise.

I stuck my feet into my slippers and padded quietly towards the door, opening it a crack to see my brother patiently waiting outside.

"Oh good, I was hoping you had woken up." He raised his eyebrows. "You guys looked pretty comfortable. Is she still...?"

I pushed the door closed behind me as quietly as I could and narrowed my eyes at him. "Yeah she's still resting. Why are you being so weird about this?"

He just grinned and gave me a knowing look, not bothering to explain. "Doctor Denove says you're ready to go home."

"What! When?"

"I don't know... A couple hours?" He looked so happy. So hopeful.

My heart fell. He really thought that I was going to make it.

I didn't really want to bring myself into a depressing state, but I couldn't control my thoughts and my mind started to wonder. What if I don't make it? What if I can't live through this for him?

I shivered and faked a smile. "Awesome."

I had to admit, it would be nice to be able to curl up in my own bed again, in my own clothes.

"How long were we asleep for, by the way?" I asked him, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Just a couple of hours. At least, enough time for me to get coffee and hit on the barista until she gave me her number." He pulled out a crumpled gum wrapper from his pocket with a scribbled set of blue inked numbers on the back. "I have a date tomorrow."

I punched his shoulder and shook my head. "Of course you do," I teased. I was so unbelievably grateful that he was still finding the gusto in him to go on with his life, despite the drag of having a terminally ill sister.

I was already looking forward to getting my time back with my brother when I got home; but then I thought of Anna, there all alone in that empty room. Maybe even with a new roommate.

I shivered.

"Can we come back and visit Anna tomorrow?" The inflection in my voice was a mix of eagerness and frenzy.

He smirked and nodded. "Never thought you'd choose to be in a hospital, but whatever."

I rolled my eyes and gave him a soft hug. "Thank you, Kris. For everything. You have been too good to me."

"Well I only have one sister, don't I?"

I couldn't believe it; I was actually feeling genuinely happy for the first time since I got my morbid news because of my time with Kris and Anna remembering me. As I pulled out of his arms, though, I realized how much meaning had been buried in his words.

He only had one sister. And soon? He might not even have that.

….

Anna helped me gather up my things and came down with me to the lobby to see me off. She hadn't really said much since I broke the news to her that I would be departing. She had actually been looking down despairingly at her feet as we rode down in the elevators, side by side, in regulation wheelchairs. Kris and the orderly pushing Anna's chair didn't really notice the tension between us as they animatedly chatted about good surf spots on the coast.

"Kristoff is going to drop me off for visiting hours tomorrow morning before he goes to class," I told her, hoping to lift her spirits. I smiled as her jaw dropped open and her face lit up.

"You're coming to visit…me?" She raised her hands up to her face and cradled her cheeks in them.

"Are you trying to be the most adorable thing on this damn planet? Because it's working," I blurted out before thinking of the legitimate implications of what I had said.

A dark blush spread across her face. "I-uh," she stuttered.

"I mean- yes. Yeah. We can't have you getting bored, now can we?" I awkwardly steered my train of thought away from the feelings Anna was giving me in the pit of my stomach every time she did something mildly cute.

She grabbed my hand and placed our palms together, eyes meeting in a flurry of light and dark blue.

"Thank you."

As our hands pulled apart, though, she let a small, paper thin something fall into my grasp.

As we made it to the front doors, I stood up and grabbed my bag of books and raised my shoulders up in discomfort. I peered down into my hand to see that Anna had, in a very intimate manor, given me a tiny pressed flower. Must have fallen out of one of my books.

The bright light coming from the huge glass doors made me squint in pain. From that point on, as soon as I walked out that door, my life would be altered again. I would be back in the real world with a burden I hadn't come in with, but couldn't leave behind: My cancer.

Every moment from here on out is real.

I knew that if for some reason I didn't make it in the end, I had better start living every single waking moment as if it was my last.

Because any one of them very well could be.

…..

A/N: THERE. HAVE YOUR FLUFF…..enjoy it while it lasts… wait, what? *Background cackling*

-I really really really hope you guys liked the last couple of chapters, because we are officially in this for the long run. I have never gotten such an incredible reaction to one of my fics before and I have every intention on seeing this one through to the end.

I take a long time when I write, and as of now, I have logged AT LEAST 25 hours of work in. That's more than a freaking day, people. For YOU. Be grateful.

I sure am grateful for all the nice things you guys are saying. I mean 50 reviews?! DAMN this is so rad. Keep them coming! I love love love reading each and every one of them.

I'm going to be at Disneyland all day tomorrow, so hopefully another update on Saturday?

Love you all.

Always,

Jess