A/N: I had this song stuck in my head all day before to posting this chapter and I thought it was very fitting for the chapter and the title as well.
www . youtube watch?v=i76aSKBF5qo
Don't Ever Forget 8 ~ I'm Coming Home
My leg was bouncing relentlessly throughout the entire flight from Maryland to Washington, anxiousness consuming me more with every mile that passed. I was going home to see my family and friends, and of course, my Bella. I missed them all, naturally, but the ache I had been feeling from being so far away from Bella seemed more intense since my leave the month before. She seemed so different when I returned from Basic, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it.
Was it just from not seeing her every day for nine weeks, when she'd been such a central part of my life since the moment I met her? Had being away simply changed me, shifting our association with each other? Or had we both simply grown up and matured in our time apart, taking life a little more seriously?
I wasn't sure, but it also didn't really matter. The experience had actually brought us closer, and it gave me immeasurable hope for the future.
Then why was I so nervous? I was still running that question through my mind as we began our descent into Seattle, and it only made me more eager to get off that plane and back to my parents' house, where I knew Bella would be waiting for me as well. I checked my phone as soon as I got into the terminal and began weaving through the passel of holiday travelers. There was no text from Bella, which unreasonably caused my stomach to clench. I'd be seeing her in a matter of hours; what difference should it make that she hadn't texted back?
Because then I would feel truly home.
I was momentarily able to forget my tormenting thoughts when I caught sight of my brother coming toward me at baggage claim, with Rosalie right beside him, engulfing me in his massive arms as soon as he reached me.
"I'm getting my hug in now while I still can before you get home and I lose ya to a pair of smaller arms," Emmett joked, gripping me so firmly in his embrace that it made it difficult to breathe.
"Well, in that case, I better get mine, too," Rosalie said with a laugh, pulling my brother away from me and wrapping her arms around my neck. "We've really missed you around here."
"I've missed you, too," I mumbled against her shoulder, hugging her tightly as Emmett grabbed my bag from the floor. As we pulled apart, I was surprised to find tears glistening in her eyes that she quickly tried to blink away. It was a rarity to see Rosalie so emotional over anything—she didn't even cry at her own wedding or at Sarahlynn's birth. But her arm clung around my waist all the way out of the airport and to the car.
We'd grown close throughout the beginning of her relationship with Emmett, and she'd become my sole confidante through the weeks before Bella and I got together finally. We were an unlikely pair, but I could tell her things that I couldn't tell anyone else—my feelings for Bella, my irrational jealousy over her relationship with James, my regrets for going to Alaska and my fear of losing her completely when I eventually left for good. And that bond between us had never faded, even if we kept it buried beneath the surface while in everyone else's company. But the tearful reaction was the last thing I would have ever expected from Rosalie.
Emmett was talking animatedly throughout the entire drive to Forks, and while I wasn't ignoring him, my eyes were fixed on the screen of my phone. I began flipping through the menagerie of pictures I had stored on there, anxious to see each and every face sooner than I could physically get to them. My parents, Jasper and Alice, Sarahlynn, and finally, Bella. Many pictures of that beautiful face flew by until I paused at the one she'd sent me weeks before. It was a combination that only Bella could pull off for me—her sweet, innocent face, with a hint of mischievousness in her eyes, the shy biting of her lip as she sprawled her sexy body along her bed in that little nightgown. And with a single glance, telling me that every part of her was mine.
Aside from the obvious reaction that picture always incited in me, causing me to shift uncomfortably in the back seat, it was also exactly what I needed at the moment. My girl. All mine.
When I finally heard the crunching of gravel beneath the tires of the car, I looked up to see us pulling up to my parents' house and Bella's car parked right out front. I felt my shoulders immediately relax at the sight—she was there, just as she said she would be, text or no text. I couldn't get into that house quickly enough, even though Emmett and Rosalie somehow made it to the door first. I was swept into my mother's arms as soon as I stepped inside, and despite my anxiousness to see Bella, I relished in her embrace and my father's "welcome home" greeting.
Soon enough, though, my eyes began scanning the room for Bella, and when I didn't see her, my heart began hammering in my chest.
"Where's Bella?" I asked as my mother released me and stepped back to rub my cheek with her fingertips where her lips had obviously left smudges on my skin with her kisses. When she moved aside, I turned around and my gaze finally met Bella's across the room, where she was biting her lip as she always did to contain her smile and lifted her hand to give me a little wave. My own smile grew as her arms fell to her sides and I read the bold letters on her tiny t-shirt.
"I heart my soldier"
God, I fucking love this girl, I thought as I made my way over to her as quickly as I could manage and pulled her against me. Lifting her feet from the floor, I immersed myself in the laughter that escaped her as I spun her around. I never thought anything would ever feel better than seeing her again after Basic, but I was so wrong. Actually coming home to her waiting there for me was the most amazing feeling in the world. And the words across her chest, expressing an unspoken pride in me and her unmistakable acceptance of my becoming a soldier was too overwhelming for words. I set her down, holding her face between my hands and kissed the lips I'd been dying to have against mine again for weeks.
With her forehead pressed to mine once our lips parted, I realized that I was right before. She was the missing element, what I needed to really feel home. She was my home now.
"Hi," she whispered as her fingers gripped the fabric of my shirt at my sides.
I opened my eyes to look down at her and I was immediately immersed in the dark pools of hers, and I wanted to disappear within the sanctuary of that space I shared only with her. To lose myself in her arms for the entire time I was home, even though I knew that was impossible. But was five minutes too much to ask?
I unwillingly released her for a moment to grab my bag that Emmett had just brought in, but kept a firm hold of Bella's hand, refusing to lose contact with her for even a second. The feeling of her slender fingers sliding between mine, her thumb running over my knuckle as we ascended the stairs toward my room, was one of the simplest things I'd missed, and I couldn't get her behind that door fast enough.
The instant it clicked closed, I dropped my bag to the floor and took her other hand, backing my way toward the bed. Her smirk matched mine as I toppled back onto the mattress with her on top of me, and she immediately sealed my lips with hers in a kiss we'd both been aching for, for weeks. Naturally, my body began responding to the rolling of her hips above mine, and with a deep groan, I flipped her onto her back, hitching her leg higher on my hip. I knew we only had a few minutes before we would be expected back downstairs, but I needed to feel her against me in ways that would be entirely inappropriate in front of my family. We hadn't been together physically in so long, resorting to brief, whispered words on the phone or the occasional dirty text, trying to make up for the absence of everything else. And it was never enough for either of us.
The following summer couldn't come fast enough. I would be finished with training, she'd have completed high school, and we'd hopefully never need to be apart again.
"Hi," I finally replied as I kissed along her neck, soaking in the feel and scent of her.
Bella giggled softly, her hands roaming my back and hair, just as eager to soak me in as well, and causing her to release a contented sigh. "Let's just stay right here the whole time you're home. No one will miss us over the holidays."
I smiled against her skin as she hooked her calf securely around the back of my thigh, holding me against her. "That's some pretty wishful thinking you've got going on there, baby."
"I know," she groaned with a pout and I lifted my head, brushing my lips softly over her pursed ones. "I just want as much time with you as I can get before we're sucked back into reality again."
"I'll make sure there's more time for us this time around, Bella. I promise," I whispered, running the backs of my fingers along her neck. "In fact, I'm in the mood for a swim after lunch. How about you?"
Bella raised a single brow at me and rolled her eyes. "Only you would think about going swimming in the middle of winter. You do realize there's ice on the ground out there, right?"
"Which means an even lower chance of being disturbed, and some real time alone," I replied with a grin, wiggling my eyebrows. "Come on, I haven't been in my pool in months, and even longer since I've seen you in a bikini."
"I have to say the idea holds appeal. But no bikini," Bella replied, shaking her head.
"You can't deny me the bikini," I spoke in a gravelly voice as my lips ghosted over hers.
Bella gave a soft moan, her hands lowering to grab my ass and she rolled me onto my back, pecking a kiss on my cheek. "Watch me."
Her fingers shoved playfully against my mouth as she stood from the bed, beginning to move toward the door but I grabbed her wrist, pulling her back beside me. Her laughter emanated through the room as the mattress bounced beneath her fall, and was smothered by my lips sealing over hers again. But that time, we simply melted into each other, her arms sliding slowly around my shoulders, soft brushes of her tongue on mine teasing, but gentle. Her soft whimper that followed wasn't demanding, just held the same need and want to be close to me as I felt for her.
My phone began buzzed in my pocket and I sighed heavily, rolling off Bella as I pulled it out to check it.
Hope ur decent. Mom's coming up, I read aloud and I leapt from my bed quickly, followed more hesitantly by Bella, seconds before my mother's knock sounded on the door.
"Sweetheart, lunch is on the table," she said as she cracked it open slightly, watching as I began pulling clothes out of my bag, that I had quickly moved to the bed. "Edward, what are you doing? You can unpack later, you need to eat."
I released a slow breath as she left the room and I could see Bella out of the corner of my eye, gazing at me with her arms crossed. "Don't ask, baby."
"Oh, you damn well know I'm going to," she retorted with an amused smirk, shaking her head.
"Then, just not now, please," I replied, taking her hand and leading her out of the room and down the stairs without another word.
As soon as I could break away after lunch, I made my way out to the pool house with Bella, and while she changed in the attached bathroom, I got into my suit right at the edge and dove in. I lost myself in the silence of being submerged in water until my lungs burned from holding my breath and I broke the surface again. Once I wiped the excess water from my face and slicked my hair back, I looked up to find Bella by the stairs. With a smirk, she shed the robe covering her to reveal the white bikini I'd been begging for earlier, and slowly descended the steps into the water.
I waded toward her, pulling her through the water the moment I could reach her and into my arms. "Thought you weren't going to wear it."
"Who am I to deny my man of something so simple that he wants? Besides, it's also bribery," Bella replied, sliding her arms around my neck and I rolled my eyes. "You knew I wasn't going to let it drop. What was that up there? You've gone from the guy who used to have a ladder to his window, without a care in the world, to one that's leaping from the bed at the idea of getting caught kissing his girlfriend on the bed. What's going on?"
I sighed heavily, but her eyes held genuine curiosity, and all hints of teasing had vanished. "Have you noticed my mother acting weird lately?"
Bella's forehead wrinkled in thought, her gaze pensive as she dipped her head back in the water to wet her hair before looking back to me and shrugging. "I don't know. She misses you guys and constantly has to stay busy. She doesn't know what to do with herself. But other than that, she seems fine."
I gazed down at her and rested my forehead on hers, just wanting the last moment I would likely have with her for a while. "I think me going away and Emmett getting married and moving to Seattle so quickly in succession…maybe it was too much all at once for her. Both of us growing up too fast or something. I don't know how to explain it, but she's almost more mothering to me now than she's been my whole life. Always asking to make sure I'm eating and sleeping while I'm away, or if I need anything out there, checking on me if I'm alone with my girlfriend a little too long in my room."
"Well, you are her baby, Edward. Did you honestly expect no empty nest stuff when you left?" Bella asked, tilting her head slightly and tracing her fingers distractedly along the back of my neck. It was such a calming gesture, I could feel the muscles in my arms and shoulders begin to relax.
My lips lowered to hers in a soft kiss, hugging around her waist more securely. It felt as if I was caught up in one of my dreams, feeling her body against mine with her arms wrapped tightly around my neck. A quiet moan rumbled in my chest that seemed to resonate in the heavy air around us as she traced her tongue along my lips and they parted to deepen the kiss. Bella lifted up onto her toes, gripping me more firmly and pressing her breasts against me. She was successfully distracting me from the thoughts plaguing my mind for a couple of hours before, and more than ever, I wanted to stay in that moment with her. Completely alone, with no eyes around us, to be free to be us. "God, I've missed you."
"I've missed you, too," she whispered back, lightly dragging her teeth along my lower lip. "Let's not think anymore for a while, and just enjoy this. Everything is going to be fine."
I shivered despite the warm, humid air as her legs rose under the water to wrap around my waist. My hands lowered to take hold of her hips, gripping them gently when she began rocking against mine and stirring the arousal building inside me. I felt my mind go blank as our bodies moved together and I pressed forward, eliciting a moan from her in return.
"It's been so long. Please," Bella panted heavily and I wasted no time in lowering my swim trunks and pulling aside the fabric of her bikini bottoms.
I held her eyes as I positioned myself against her, watching as she bit her lip in anticipation and drew in a sharp inhale as I slowly pressed inside her. We remained still for a moment, enjoying the feel of being joined together again after weeks of talking and fantasizing about it, before her hips began rocking against me and her head fell back. The water rippled around us with our movements and I lowered my lips to her neck, feeling her hand rest firmly on the back of mine. It wasn't exactly the most romantic of settings for our first time together again, but our need for each other was so great, that neither of us seemed to mind. It was just us, and that was all that mattered.
My hands slid around her hips to hold her still and I began thrusting inside her more rapidly. The muscles in her thighs tensed beneath my arms and her head raised again, her teeth biting lightly into my shoulder to muffle her long, guttural moan in response. I nearly lost it right there as she clenched around me, her body rigid in my hold.
"Shit, Edward!" Bella gasped, her fingers digging into my skin as she began trembling and her chest heaved against mine in shuddering breaths.
"I love you," I whispered and her mouth sealed over mine, sucking at my bottom lips with a groan as she orgasmed. I couldn't hold back any longer after all our time apart and the feel of her constricting around me, and I released inside her with my arms wrapping tightly around her waist. Our movements slowed gradually to a stop, but our kiss melted into a slow, passionate exchange before parting. Her fingers resumed the gentle, soothing motions along the back of my neck as our foreheads rested together again.
"I love you, too," she murmured quietly and I opened my eyes to look at her. A soft, satisfied smile had appeared on her lips and I couldn't stop mine from joining it. "Welcome home."
x-x-x
The nerves in my stomach were raging after I left Bella at her house that night. I had both anticipated and dreaded what the evening would hold for several weeks, but nothing prepared me for the intensity of the trepidation I felt.
I spotted Chief Swan's cruiser parked outside the station and my palms began to sweat even more. The last time I sat down and talked in length with Bella's father, it had not been under the best of conditions and that particular discussion ran rampant through my mind.
"Sit down, Edward," he said in a calm but stern tone, sliding one of the kitchen chairs away from the table, the legs screeching in their path along the linoleum floor.
I'd never been so terrified of any single man in my entire life as I was at that moment as I moved across the room to lower into the seat. Hearing the creaking from above me did not help my anxiety at all, discerning from the movement of the sound that it was Bella pacing her floor upstairs. I drew in a deep breath as he sat down across from me, fixing me with a hard stare and folding his hands in front of him. "Sir…"
Chief Swan cut me off abruptly with the raise of his hand at me, shaking his head. "I have a few things I would like to say before you start with what I am sure is a well-rehearsed speech."
The collar of my shirt seemed to tighten around my neck with his tone, making it impossible to swallow against the lump that had formed in my throat. I began rapidly imagining all the possible things he could say to me, considering the conditions we were there under—the worst of which was "stay the hell away from my daughter."
"The first thing you need to understand is that girl upstairs is my life. If anything ever happened to her, I would have nothing left. So, I'm sure you can understand that not finding her where she was supposed to be under any circumstances would cause me a fair bit of alarm. But gone all night with no way of reaching her, terrified that something had happened to her in that storm. I don't even have the words," he began, his even voice faltering only slightly as he spoke, but his expression remained in place. "It took me a while to get used to the idea of my baby dating at all, but to see her getting out of a car with a boy she's spent all night with…lying to me about being at a friend's house. That's not the girl I raised. And pardon me for being frank, but you're leaving come summer. My daughter is not a play thing, and I won't watch her get her heart broken when you've gone and are done with her."
My chest tightened at the pain lacing his words and the slight clenching of his jaw. I wasn't sure if he was ready for me to respond, so I waited until he leaned back in his chair, folding his arms over his chest and his brow rose expectantly. "Chief Swan, I completely understand the reasons behind your feelings and concerns. And I can assure you that the last thing I ever want to do is hurt Bella. She is the most important thing in my life, and I couldn't imagine her ever not being a part of it."
"But you're leaving her behind to join the Army. And she strongly believes that she's … in love with you," he said, swallowing hard as he paused in his statement. "She's still so young, Edward."
"Sir, I know we're both young. And my leaving won't be an easy thing for either of us. This is something I've wanted to do for as long as I can remember, and I never imagined that I would be leaving anyone behind other than my family. But I'm not leaving her," I replied, trying to keep my voice calm and reassuring. "She's not just a fling for me. I love her, very much, and I want her to be a part of my future."
My heart pounded harshly as I watched his hand rise to his face, running his fingers down his mustache with a speculative look in his eyes. "And if she decides that this isn't what she wants?"
I closed my eyes and exhaled slowly, finally looking down to my lap as that thought ran through my mind. We'd be apart a lot over the next two years at least, and I knew that anything was possible in that time, as much as I prayed for the contrary. When I wasn't there every day to hold her and tell her I loved her, when she was constantly surrounded by guys who could give her that, I knew she could always change her mind. "Then I would let her go. If that's what would make her happy, I would do it. That's all I want for her, even if I'm not the one to give it to her."
I heard him sigh heavily and I looked up again to find him leaning forward on his elbows, his fingers pressed to his lips. "I know you're a good kid, Edward. And I think it's a very honorable thing you're doing with this enlistment in the Army, and in everything you just said. But what happened the other day … there could have been a multitude of consequences, and still can. I don't want to see Bella get herself into trouble, before her life every really begins, or yours for that matter. Aside from the legal repercussions that could have been a factor."
I cleared my throat and shifted nervously in my chair with the implications his uncomfortably stated words presented. I was eighteen years old and in a sexual relationship with the police chief's minor daughter. If he wanted to, he could eliminate any of my aspirations for the future with a criminal record. But in addition to that, my girlfriend's father was discreetly broaching the topic of that intimate relationship I had with his daughter, a subject I would even have difficulty discussing with my own parents. I tried to find the words to respond, but no sound escaped me despite my numerous efforts.
"You can relax, I'm not taking that route. But this is very serious. I know everything may seem safe, but sometimes, all the precautions in the world are not enough. Bella herself is living proof of that. I don't regret having my daughter, but I want something better for her. Finish high school, go to college, be prepared for life," Chief Swan spoke in a low voice, his eyes locked on me.
"I want that for her as well, sir," I replied once I finally found my voice again, trying to keep my gaze on his. "And no matter what happens, I will take care of her to the best of my ability, whatever that takes. I don't want for her to sacrifice anything more than she already is."
He stared at me silently for what felt like an eternity, seeming to size me up as I could almost see the wheels turning in his head. Had I said something wrong? I ran over every word I'd spoken in the last half hour of talking to him, each expression on his face, but Charlie Swan was one of the most difficult men to read that I'd ever met. And I knew that when it came to his daughter, he was exceedingly protective. He drew in several long, deep breaths as we sat there in the quiet, the only sign of movement was his eyes as they flickered over me.
"Edward," he finally spoke, clearing his throat and sitting up straighter. "I'm sure you mean everything you've said and it took a lot for you to come here today, and I respect that. But the fact still remains that you've violated my trust, and it's going to take a lot more than a little talking to fix that."
"Yes, I know, sir," I replied with a nod, lowering my eyes as I prepared myself for what was to come.
"So, this is how it's going to be…"
I'd sat there and listened as he laid down the rules; I couldn't see Bella outside of school until the end of the semester, and even then, I wasn't allowed in the house without his supervision and we could have our one date a week, as long as she was home by his set curfew. No more sleepover at Alice's, nothing like the freedom we'd had with each other before, until he felt he could trust me with his little girl.
It was the longest semester of school imaginable, but it was worth it. Being with Bella again in that meadow where everything began for us, absorbing every touch and the feel of her in my arms again, was made all the more exhilarating by the absence of it all for months. We didn't even give any thought to having sex that night—that wasn't all we were, and the time apart had actually been good for us, giving us the opportunity to realize that. The physical aspect of our relationship obviously hadn't ceased; we still had our moments of need, but we also learned to appreciate the simpler things. And things had improved between me and Chief Swan as well.
Yet that knowledge did not alleviate the nervousness I felt at coming face to face with my girlfriend's father again. I stared at the front of the building for several minutes before taking a deep breath to steady myself and stepped out of the car, tugging my jacket tightly around me against the cold wind as I jogged toward the door.
The moment I stepped inside, my eyes met Chief Swan, standing there waiting for me. Too late to turn back now, I thought to myself through my anxiety, but quickly shook off that idea. I didn't want to turn back.
"Edward, good to see you," he said, approaching me and holding his hand out to shake mine. "Glad to be home?"
"Yes, sir," I replied with his hand clamped firmly in mine, hoping I didn't appear as nervous as I felt. "I'm sorry for bothering you at work, Chief Swan, but I was wondering if I could have a word with you in private. Without Bella present."
His brow furrowed into worried lines across his forehead, but he nodded. "Of course. Is everything all right?"
I hummed in affirmation as he led me through the station to a desk in the back, and I sat down across from him. He leaned back in his chair, eyeing me expectantly. Once again, I found myself at a loss for words and cleared my throat, trying to free them.
"Edward?" he said, urging me to begin.
I took a deep breath in an effort to gather the courage to speak and finally looked up to him again. "Sir, as you know, I will be graduating from training school at the end of next summer. And with Bella also graduating from high school in June, it's our hope that she will be joining me wherever I'm stationed afterward."
"Not that I needed reminding, but yes," he replied, causing me to tense slightly until I saw the hint of a smile come across his lips, followed by a brief chuckle. "Son, relax. I wouldn't have signed the papers for the accelerated program if I wasn't fully aware of that possibility or had any serious reservations about it. I know you'll take good care of her, as if she couldn't do so herself."
I released a heavy exhaled, feeling my shoulders loosen minimally. "I love and respect Bella more than any woman in my life, aside from my mother. And I want to do everything right by her."
His face shifted to that of confusion, folding his arms over his chest, and my heart started racing at the familiarity of that sight.
"Chief Swan, I would like to ask for your permission to marry your daughter."
