A/N: This chapter doesn't need to exist, but I wanted to spend more time with the Off-Colors damn it.
8. Fusion and Foresight
- Pink Diamond talks through some problems.
Padparadscha wandered alone, away from the group. She knew it was dangerous, that she could be killed before she even saw it coming. She didn't care; she needed some space. If she heard one more sarcastic "Thanks, Padparadscha" from Rhodonite, she would scream.
She could hear them calling for her and ignored them. They must have interrupted their training session to search for her. She sighed when she saw Pink Diamond find her, and turned around.
Pink looked relieved, but hesitated to approach her. "What's wrong, Padparadscha? Why did you sneak off?"
…
The sapphire shook her head, trying to hide her tears. "I-I'm fine."
Pink wasn't fooled; she closed the distance between them and sat down. "What's wrong?" she softly asked again.
…
The kindness and compassion in Pink's voice always made Padparadscha feel warm inside, like she was being wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket. Maybe she should talk about it… Pink would listen, wouldn't she? She was always so patient with her…
"I'm useless…"
Pink blinked, shocked at the ordinarily cheerful gem's despondent mood. "You're not useless," she was quick to affirm.
…
"Yes I am! I-I can't fight! I'm always behind and I can't react to things in time! Everyone always has to look out for me; I just put them in danger…" Padparadscha sniffled, not wanting to cry in front of her friend.
Pink shuffled closer, beginning to understand. She put a hand on the sapphire's shoulder, gently encouraging her to lean into her side. After a few seconds, she did so with a sigh.
…
"I feel like such a burden…"
"You're not." Pink shook her head. "Everyone cares a lot for you, y'know. I've only been around for a month, but I'm not blind." She smiled and gave her a little squeeze. "I care a lot, too. None of us want to see you get hurt."
…
"I-I know… But I want to protect them, too! How am I supposed to do that if I can't fight?"
"Fighting isn't everything," Pink replied. "You remember Garnet, right?"
…
Padparadscha nodded.
"Future vision isn't all it's cracked up to be. The rebellion should have ended that day, but it didn't, thanks to the actions of one unpredictable person. Sapphire's prediction was wrong, when she should have been infallible."
The diamond sighed. It was hard to think about someone she lost. "Ruby's unpredictability allowed Garnet to see all sorts of futures. She was always calculating which futures were most likely to happen, trying to decide which actions she should take. I can't imagine how stressful it must have been, to see numerous futures where you failed and someone got hurt."
…
"That sounds terrible…" The sapphire shivered. She couldn't imagine either.
"And…" Pink swallowed heavily. "The things she could see depended on what information she had. I never told her the truth… I should have. She was one of my closest friends, and yet, I didn't give her the tools she needed to be as accurate as she could. She never saw that day coming; it's one of my biggest regrets…"
…
Padparadscha consoled her friend as well as she could, putting an arm around her waist and leaning in more. "You did your best…"
Pink wiped away the tear that wanted to escape. She was supposed to be comforting Padparadscha, not the other way around. "You're doing your best, too. I admire how you're always so tenacious and bright. You cheer everyone up."
…
The compliments were nice, but… "Sometimes I feel like I just annoy everyone…" Padparadscha sighed.
"It's not your fault," Pink reassured. "You didn't ask to be created this way. It does mean that you have to find different ways to be helpful. That's not a bad thing; there are plenty of things you can do that others can't."
…
"Like what?" She sniffled again, drying her eye with Pink's dress.
Pink tapped a finger on her chin for a moment, thinking. "Well, you caught me spying on you, didn't you? There was nothing I could do to stop you from seeing me."
…
Oh… Oh yeah, she had done that.
"And, from what I've seen, you sense intention and emotion as well. You don't even have to know someone to sense something about them," Pink continued. "You'll never be wrong, because what you see has already happened."
…
Padparadscha didn't know what to say. "You really think I can be useful?"
"Of course!" Pink chirped. "You have just as much potential as anyone else."
…
"You really think so?"
Pink's smile was answer enough. "Now, what brought this on?"
…
"…It's Rhodonite… She's always acting like she's annoyed with me. I catch her rolling her eyes sometimes," she answered, sounding frustrated. "Probably everyone else feels like that, too, they're just subtler."
"Maybe you should talk to them about it?" Pink suggested. "Do they know it bothers you?"
…
"No… I guess I can do that…" She knew they cared, but she didn't want to trouble them with trivial things.
It took a moment for Pink to speak again. "I'm sorry, it's my fault too…"
…
"What? How? You didn't do anything."
The diamond shook her head. "Leaving you on the sidelines while everyone else was learning to fight couldn't have felt very good… I'll be sure to come up with some exercises for you, to help you strengthen your vision, ok?"
…
The sapphire immediately perked up. "Oh! That sounds fun!"
Pink smiled. "It will be. Now c'mon, we'd better get back before the others worry themselves to death."
…
"Ok!" Padparadscha agreed, giggling when her hair was playfully ruffled. She relaxed as Pink scooped her up into her arms. She didn't mind being carried. It made her feel certain that this strange, cuddly diamond would never allow harm to come to her.
"Hey Pink, can we ask you something?"
Pink Diamond was currently up on a ridge, relaxing on her back with one leg dangling lazily. She looked down to see the Rutile Twins. She sat up and jumped off, carefully controlling her descent to land gracefully on her feet. "Sure, what's up?"
Tile opened her mouth, but couldn't think of what to say. She and her sister twiddled their thumbs anxiously.
Pink cocked her head, concerned. "Is something wrong?"
Ru shook her head. "No, we were just wondering…"
"You said you'd never seen anyone like us before," Tile continued.
"I haven't, why?" Pink didn't know where this was going.
"There's really no one else like us?" Ru wondered.
"Well, there could be, but I haven't met them yet," Pink tried to backpedal. She didn't understand why this seemed to be a problem. Why did they look so sad?
They didn't seem to believe her. "It's just… We hoped there was someone out there who could understand us," Tile said.
She didn't know what to say to that. She could spout something about how they had each other or how no two gems ever had the exact same experiences. But that didn't seem like it would help. "Well, what's it like?"
The question seemed to startle them. "It's hard to put into words…" Tile hesitated.
"We always have to be in sync. We can kind of hear each other's thoughts," Ru said.
"We're never alone. Sometimes, I think it would be nice to be apart for a bit."
"That's interesting…" Pink liked how these two were so unique. "I wish I could have had someone like you two have each other…"
"Why would you want to be a freak like us?" Ru questioned, disapproving.
"Oh, I don't mean exactly the same way, but… I've been lonely for most of my life." Pink sighed. "My status kept me apart from other gems. And I don't have an equal to be friends with, because my sisters are higher-ranking than me. Lower-ranking gems were too scared of me."
"That's awful… I can't imagine being alone," Tile sighed. Pink's life seemed to be filled with a lot of unfair things. No wonder she was fine with hanging out with off-colors.
"I'm not anymore, thanks to all of you." Pink gave one of her bright smiles. "Honestly, I never thought I could fit in so well. It makes me really happy when you guys forget I'm a diamond and treat me like I'm a regular person."
"I mean, you are," Ru shrugged. She blushed when Pink's eyes twinkled at her.
Tile spoke up. "You were never frightened of us or disgusted. You respected what we were right away…"
"Why would I be frightened of you?"
"When we emerged…"
"The other gems ran away."
"They were afraid… That's how we survived…"
The diamond frowned, her brow furrowing in that sort-of-scary way it did when she heard something she thought was unjust.
"What was your emergence like?" Tile asked.
"Lonely." Pink got a far-away look in her eyes. "I was the only one there, and it was a little while before Yellow and Blue came. They were so much bigger than me, I was a little scared. I knew they were supposed to be my sisters, but they just looked…disappointed."
"Wait, how much bigger?" Ru questioned. Pink was pretty tall already, in her opinion. She remembered how tiny the little projected Rose Quartz had been next to Yellow Diamond.
Pink seemed amused. "Oh, Blue and Yellow are about 40 feet tall. I barely come up past their knees!"
"Whoa…" No wonder diamonds had a reputation for being terrifying.
"And White was absolutely massive," she continued in a conspiratorial tone. "She was just over 100 feet tall."
The twins thought they might faint. "So…you-you're not supposed to be this small?"
"…I don't know. I never asked… Would they even tell me the truth?" Pink grew pensive. "I've wondered if that's why they seem to have no compassion for their fellow gems. They used to let me sit on their shoulders sometimes; everyone looks so small from up there…" She snapped out of it, smiling mischievously. "Overcooked or not, I'm defective anyway, behavior-wise."
"I can't argue with that," Ru shrugged. Tile just nodded in agreement.
"My sisters were always disappointed… No matter how hard I tried to fit into my role, I never could. I'm happier now, just being myself." Pink looked at them fondly. "Thank you so much for accepting me here."
Tile smiled at her. "It's not hard to like you. You're a kind person."
"You accept us, so we accept you."
They were not surprised that she hugged them.
Fluorite stretched out, yawning. Pink Diamond was lying against her, but Fluorite didn't mind. Pink wasn't heavy, and her company was companionable. She knew Pink tended to have awful nightmares if no one was with her while she slept. Not to mention, they were both very fond of naps, anyway.
Pink looked at her, her eyes sparkling with all the curiosity of a newly-emerged gem. "How do you manage to stay so stable? Six is a record for permafusions, you know."
Fluorite blushed. "It's just a matter of meeting the right gems. We wouldn't mind more."
Pink chuckled. "Well, I'm not opposed to fusing with you, but I suspect I'd be too energetic and disruptive for your tastes."
Fluorite's eyebrows shot up. It was nice that Pink was so accepting of fusion, but it was still shocking when she said things like that so casually.
Pink turned on her side, towards her. "Got any questions for me?"
"None that I can think of, dear."
"Heh, dear." The diamond blushed a bit, looking down shyly. "You're very motherly, you know. It's nice."
"Motherly?"
"Oh, I suppose you wouldn't know what a mother is." She shifted again, so she could project from her gem. "It was a human thing. Humans didn't reproduce like gems; they needed two parents: a mother, and a father." She showed a pair of humans, one that had a feminine shape like elegant types of gems did, and another that was built sturdier, a bit like a topaz or quartz.
"The father would be the injector, and the mother the earth. A baby would grow inside of her, and emerge nine months later. It wasn't like a kindergarten; the process didn't drain the life out of the mother, so she could have as many children as she wanted." Her diagram was naively simplistic. "Humans didn't come out fully grown like gems. It would take years for them to get to full size, and they needed their parents to take care of them until they could take care of themselves."
"How strange…" Fluorite commented. While the explanation wasn't complicated, it was a lot to wrap her head around.
"They were always growing and changing… It was something I admired about them." Pink's expression fell, and she stopped projecting. The poor thing could hardly go for an hour without thinking about something that saddened her.
"And what does 'motherly' mean?" Fluorite reminded, distracting her from her thoughts.
"Oh! Motherly means mother-like. Mothers are always taking care of their younglings, so someone motherly takes care of and cares about others. You take care of the others here and make sure they're safe." She grew shy again. "And now you take care of me, too…"
"I see…" Yes, that did sound like her. "You've been through some horrible things; you deserve some care."
…
"It's strange…"
"What is, dear?"
"That I don't hate them as much as I should. Blue and Yellow, I mean." Pink turned onto her back again, staring up into the void above. Somewhere up there were her sisters. "…Do you think they're looking for me?"
Fluorite curled a little closer to the diamond, sensing that the topic was delicate. "It seems likely."
"I hope they aren't…and yet I do. …I don't know what to feel."
The fusion patiently stroked the diamond's hair. "It can be hard to know how to feel about people who have hurt you."
Pink heaved a long sigh, leaning into Fluorite's touch. "Sometimes, I feel like they don't care at all. Like I'm just an annoyance to them. I needed things like this-" She gestured to what Fluorite was doing. "But they never did stuff like that. It was 'improper'." She just breathed for a minute, thinking.
"But sometimes, there were little things that made me think, maybe they did care after all. Maybe it's not their fault they don't know how to show it." Pink's voice grew soft. "When I was grieving, Blue would send her pearl to me, every so often. She would clean me up a little, and sometimes she would talk even though she probably wasn't supposed to. Maybe she knew that I wouldn't get her in trouble, or didn't think I was listening.
"She told me once, that Blue and Yellow had asked White to reconsider my punishment. They asked if some of my Crystal Gems couldn't be reconditioned. …I don't know if that would have been a worse fate, but they tried, at least."
"What will you do if you have to fight them?" Fluorite questioned. She hoped there wouldn't be another war.
"I don't know…" Pink thumbed away the tears budding in her eyes. "I hope that they'll just let me leave, that we can talk it out. I don't think they want to fight again, but I don't know for sure what they'll do, if they'll do everything they can to keep me here. I hope they'll learn someday, because I don't want to rule Homeworld by myself."
She paused. A certain hardness fell over her, just for a moment. "I do know one thing. I'm never letting a mass-shattering like that happen ever again. I will do what I must."
She sniffled. Fluorite grasped her hand and squeezed gently. "You won't have to face them alone, dear."
"Thank you…"
The silence stretched on long enough for Fluorite to nod off a tad. Just when she thought that Pink might have fallen asleep, the diamond spoke again.
"I wish I had had someone like you, when I was new…" Pink rolled onto her side and curled up into a ball. "One could say that White was my mother, and indeed, the mother of all gemkind."
"What was she like?"
"She was…different. She was ancient, and massive, and terrifying. Everything had to be her way, and no one could deny her what she wanted. She would do something unimaginably terrible to you if you tried. Even my sisters were afraid of her…
"She was always so condescending, like I wasn't worth her time. She rarely let me get a word in when I tried to talk to her. Even when I was trying to be serious, she just dismissed it as another one of my 'games'…
"She called me her Starlight." Pink shuddered. "I hate that nickname. It makes me feel cold and…insignificant."
"Did White Diamond ever hurt you?"
"…Not physically. At least, not until she tried to bleach me. She was always as still as a statue, except for her face. The first time I ever saw her move was that day and I didn't even have time to react."
Fluorite suppressed her own shudder. She was glad that White Diamond was gone. She likely played a prominent role in Pink's nightmares.
"I wonder if it's all falling apart up there, without her. Maybe nobody even knows she's gone yet."
The fusion had been wondering that as well. She was sure Blue and Yellow Diamond had their work cut out for them.
"I can hardly believe it myself…" Pink looked wistful and somber. "I wonder if she loved me, in her own way… Or if I was just a plaything to her… She didn't think anything of erasing me."
"She was not a very good mother," Fluorite decided.
Pink chuckled, sighing. "No, no she wasn't." She snuggled a little closer to the fusion, eyelids drooping. "Thank you for listening, Fluorite."
"Anytime, my dear," Fluorite murmured. "Now, how about a nap?"
The diamond yawned. "That sounds lovely."
"That's it! I'm done! I quit!" The fusion threw up her hands in exasperation, turning to leave.
Pink Diamond, who had shrunk down to half her size for sparring purposes, reached a hand out towards her. "Rhodonite-"
Rhodonite spun and pointed at her. "Nuh-uh! I can't take anymore of your crazy ideas! You're gonna get us all killed!" She frantically pulled at her hair.
Pink looked at the other off-colors, bewildered. They just shrugged at her. She returned to her regular size in a flash of light, seeing that training was done for the day. "Could you give us some space, please?" she asked them. Rhodonite hadn't clicked with her like the others; they needed to have a talk.
The others nodded and left. Pink walked up to the fusion. "Um, Rhodonite, is there a problem?" she asked tersely.
The fusion hesitated for a second before spitting it out, "Yes! You!"
"Me? What did I do?" An eyebrow rose when the fusion waved her hands at her. "You just gestured to all of me."
"Yes, it's everything!" Rhodonite turned on a heel, covering her face with her hands as she paced. "Pretty much everything you do or say is inappropriate; I shouldn't even be yelling at you right now without being punished but I am!"
"Uh…" Pink didn't know how to deal with this. "I would hope you guys can tell me when something's bothering you, so…" she tried.
"You don't get it! You're a diamond, I'm not supposed to exist, and you're supposed to be the one making sure of that!"
"Well, uh, my entire personality isn't going to change just like that, so I'm not sure what you want me to do? You know I'm not gonna hurt you."
"A pearl and ruby aren't supposed to fuse! They shouldn't have run away! I deserve to be shattered!"
"Stop it!" The sharp, commanding tone froze the fusion in her tracks. "Just. Stop it." She'd finally done it; she'd finally managed to upset Pink Diamond.
Said diamond marched over to her, causing her to flinch. She yelped when Pink firmly put her hands on her shoulders and knelt down in front of her.
"If you think you're so wrong, then why are you still together?" Pink inquired, frowning severely.
"I-I-I… We…" Rhodonite stuttered, petrified.
"Does it feel right? To be with each other?
She nodded.
"Then what's the problem?"
Rhodonite roused herself and tore away from Pink's grasp. "It doesn't matter what I feel! It's wrong!"
"Ugh! No it isn't! I don't know what else I can do to get you to understand!" Pink stood and walked a short distance away, fuming as she massaged her temples. She knew she wasn't handling this the right way but couldn't swallow her frustration. She'd been trying for ages to get Rhodonite to feel better about herself.
"You're the one who doesn't understand!" Rhodonite vehemently pointed at the sky. "You should go back up there and resume your duties!"
Pink rolled her eyes. "No thank you, I'd rather be shattered. I didn't lose everything just to go back to something I hate."
All four of Rhodonite's hands conveyed various gestures of irritation. "Maybe if you'd done what you were supposed to in the first place, your friends wouldn't be dead!"
She clapped a hand over her mouth. Oh, oh no. She'd gone too far.
A tear trickled down Pink's cheek; her eyes were wide with hurt. She swallowed heavily and turned away, tightly wrapping her arms around her middle.
Rhodonite noticed she did that a lot when she was upset, as if she was trying to hold herself together. "I-I'm sorry… I d-didn't m-mean-"
"I just don't understand why you're so hard on yourself, Rhodonite," the diamond sighed. "You're capable of amazing things, but you won't even try."
"How do you know I'm capable of anything? I'm just a ruby and a pearl. Pearls aren't even for fighting!"
"There's no such thing as just a ruby, or just a pearl." Pink Diamond sat down suddenly and patted the ground next to her. "Come here, sit with me."
Rhodonite did as she was told.
Pink breathed out a deep sigh, letting go of the tension in her body. "I'm sorry for yelling. It's just… You remind me a lot of someone I cared about very much."
"Who?" Rhodonite tried to relax too, but couldn't quite manage.
"Do you remember who the first gem was to fight alongside me during the rebellion?"
"Y-Your pearl…"
"That's right. I did not order her to do that. I did not order her to learn how to fight, or come up with ideas. I made it as clear as I could that she didn't have to do these things for me. But she wanted to; it was her choice."
"O-Ok?" Rhodonite fidgeted.
"More often than not, she was the brains behind the operation, while I was just the enthusiasm," Pink continued. "She was…incredible. She could do anything she set her mind to, all because I gave her the freedom to find out what she was capable of."
"So? That was one pearl with a chance defect."
Pink shook her head. "No. She was my best friend." She sighed shakily, feeling tears escaping already. "I was so…happy when she started to think for herself. She'd been with me for a few thousand years, and had only been the perfect servant she was supposed to be. That day we went down to the kindergarten happened because she wanted to make me happy.
"Still, everything she ever did was for me. I can't tell you how many times she was dissipated trying to protect me when it was unnecessary. I tried to do right by her, tried to give her more freedom, but I couldn't force her to stop putting me before herself."
"What does this have to do with me?"
"Because, you're doing the same thing. You're putting the needs of Homeworld before yourself." Pink swallowed. "Look, Rhodonite. Homeworld doesn't care about the happiness of individuals; no one is happy, not even the diamonds. I just… I just want you to feel good about yourself."
Rhodonite felt her eyes tearing up and wiped at them. She scooted a little closer to Pink. "You-You really care a lot, huh?"
Pink nodded, also tearful. "Sometimes I care too much. It's not the worst flaw to have…but sometimes, it leads to a lot of suffering…"
The fusion blushed when Pink's arm went around her shoulders, gently coaxing her closer. Though she felt ashamed, she had to admit that it was nice to lean against her. The diamond always had this kind tenderness to her that made you feel warm inside.
"How do you know what you're capable of if you don't try, Rhodonite? How do you know?" Pink asked softly.
Rhodonite shook her head. "I'm not worth your time…"
"Of course you are." She rubbed the fusion's shoulder with her thumb, sighing. "I wish Pearl could be here… She was a lot better at inspiring people than me. Imagine, a pearl who could fight! She could kick your butt to Homeworld and back if she had to. Even so, she was always having to prove herself, again and again and again. It was frustrating to see."
The tears came steadily now. "I know you're tired of hearing me preach about how special fusion is."
Rhodonite nodded. "Yeah, the 'more than the sum of your components' speech is getting old. How would you even-" She stopped as a thought struck her. "No-No way, you didn't."
Pink nodded, the corner of her mouth rising slightly in amusement. "If you thought a pearl and a ruby, or a ruby and a sapphire were bad… How about a diamond and her pearl?"
Rhodonite just stared off into the distance for a while.
"So yes, I do know what fusion is quite intimately. I do understand. She was the only one I could fuse with, because she was the only one who knew. I was afraid that the others would have felt it when my power was much too large for a quartz to have." Her voice was weighed down with regret.
Rhodonite didn't know what to say. "What was her name?" she asked softly.
"Hmm?"
"Your fusion. What was her name?"
"…Rainbow Quartz."
The room lit up with pink light. Rhodonite watched as Rose Quartz and Pearl danced, graceful and full of joy. And there she was, a tall, limber fusion with wild hair. She leapt and skipped around, a picture of elegance. She looked so proud and happy to exist…
The picture glitched and faded away. Pink Diamond's dress was soaked with endless tears. "I…I miss her so much… She was my partner in everything. She was my equal, as much as she could be. Not a day goes by where I don't think of her…"
Rhodonite knew what to do, even if it was inappropriate. She climbed onto Pink's lap and wrapped her arms around her shoulders and waist. "I'm sorry I'm such a prude," she muttered. Pink would have probably hugged her eventually, anyway.
"It's alright…" She gratefully returned the embrace. "This is all a lot to take in. Not everyone adjusts quickly… I hope I'm not pushing you too hard?"
"No, no, I'll… I'll try to do better."
"Does your ruby want to protect your pearl?"
The fusion nodded.
"Does your pearl want to protect your ruby?"
Another nod.
"Do they both want to protect your friends?"
"Yes…"
"Then that's all you need."
"I-I understand…"
"Good." Pink smiled. And then she did something new; she bent and kissed the top of the fusion's head. "Never forget that you're important to someone. You're important to your components, to the people around you, and to me."
Rhodonite sobbed.
The off-colors didn't know what to do when Pink Diamond isolated herself away in a hole and wouldn't respond to them. It was their first experience with what they would later dub 'Pink's Bad Days'.
They tried to ask her what was wrong, if something had happened. She didn't answer.
When Fluorite touched her, trying to coax her out as she had before, the diamond flinched. "Don't touch me!" she snapped at her, eyes flashing dangerously. "Just leave me alone!"
Taken aback, the fusion gave her her space. She didn't think Pink would hurt her, but it was obvious she didn't want to be disturbed right now.
They moved a small distance away, reassuring her that they would be nearby.
"What do we do?" Rhodonite asked in a hushed voice, wringing her hands anxiously. "What's wrong with her?"
"How can we help her if she won't talk to us or let us touch her?" Ru asked sadly.
Padparadscha didn't say anything, just looked back and forth between her friends with worry.
Fluorite shook her head. "Everything is just too much for her right now. The emotional damage she has suffered must be overwhelming, at times."It was easy to forget what Pink had been through when she seemed to be all smiles and silliness.
"Should we just leave her alone for a while?" Tile suggested.
"I suppose so…" The large fusion sighed. It didn't feel right to leave her be, but they weren't able to help at the moment. There was nothing they could do if she wouldn't let them.
They crept back quietly, a few hours later. Fluorite approached first. "Pink? Are you alright, dear?"
Rhodonite rolled her eyes. "Does she look alright to you? …C'mon Pink, we just wanna help."
They were met with silence.
"At least come sit with us?" Ru tried.
"Please?" Tile pleaded.
Nothing.
"Oh, friends… I am receiving a sorrowful vision…" Padparadscha murmured. "Pink Diamond will desperately want our company, but will feel like she doesn't deserve it." The sapphire gasped, then determinedly marched up to the diamond. She grabbed a hand and tugged on it. "I think that that isn't true!"
Pink finally opened her eyes; they were lifeless, and tired. Her face was crusted with dried tears. Her gaze rested wearily on the little orange sapphire insistently trying to get her to move.
After what seemed like an hour, she sighed and shakily crawled out of her hole. Padparadscha stubbornly kept pulling until she had walked out among her friends.
The diamond sat down with a sudden thump, blankly staring at the ground. Fluorite went behind her; an offer to lie down. Pink did so, resting her head against the fusion's side. Padparadscha and the twins nestled into her arms. Rhodonite leaned against her back, letting her know she was there, too.
They just talked for a while, about anything and everything. Pink listened, still and hollow.
They told stories about the lives they had left behind, silly stories they made up, stories about how they would win their freedom with Pink fighting by their side.
Pink couldn't help her small, reserved smile. She had never quite felt this kind of closeness before. She had always been disappearing, going back and forth between lives. Those friends would never know certain sides of her; that regret would always weigh heavily on her shoulders.
Now, she hid nothing. She was entirely herself. What a wonderful feeling to be loved, flaws and all.
"Hey, you guys?" she interrupted softly.
"Yes?"
"What is it, dear?"
"Mmm?"
"What?"
"I love you… I didn't say it enough…before."
"We love you, too!"
"Yeah, yeah, I-I love you, too."
"I love you, dear."
She waited a few beats.
"I love you, too!"
Pink smiled, warm tears slipping down the cracks of her damaged face. At last, the wretched wounds carved into her heart could begin to heal.
A/N: I'm not as sure that Pink's overcooked as I used to be, but I still wanted to put something about it in here.
I don't have any personal experience with mental health problems such as depression; sorry if my depiction was inaccurate or the Off-Colors did the wrong thing.
I am also sorry that Rhodonite is kind of a grouch in this story. None of the Off-Colors have much characterization to work with, so I took her comment about her own existence being unforgivable and ran away with it.
