Disclaimer: Nothing you recognize from the movie King Arthur is not mine. Anything else is thought up from my imagination.

A/N: So here is chapter eight. If you get a moment please tell me what you think.


Chapter Eight: Recovering

After being rescued Arthur had decided to take the village with us. It took nearly a day to prepare and get everyone ready to travel. All the while the drums of the Saxons were heard, making all the knights' nervous. They wanted to be back at the wall already. None wanted to take these people with us and a lot of me felt like some of them would have left me, Guinevere, and the boy behind as well.

My experiences in the dungeon had left me more mangled and ill than I had thought. I had a cough that seemed to never cease, leaving me breathless most of the time. I tried to sleep but my shaking and coughing left little time for rest. Some of my wounds became infected and in this time it was unlikely that they knew what an antibiotic was or how to use them. The thought left me afraid for myself. I didn't want to die, but if I didn't improve I knew that death wouldn't be far behind.

"How is Paige?" Arthur said coming into the wagon.

Dagonet had been watching over me. I was turned toward the wall but was still awake, listening to them.

"She suffers." Dagonet told him.

"And the girl and boy?"

"The same. I don't know everything that happened to them but they were tortured beyond belief. They are lucky to be alive."

"Do what you can for them." Arthur told him.

I heard Arthur leave and turned onto my back. Dag looked at me and smiled. "Were you listening?" He asked.

"Of course I was." I told him, my voice cracking.

"You seem to be coughing less." Dag said kneeling next to me.

I smiled at him. "Sometimes it's not so bad."

"You're still very warm." He said with his hand on my forehead, his face now showing concern.

"I'm a pretty sick girl." I told him.

"You will get better." He told me determinedly.

"I have no doubts with you watching over me." I smiled.

He turned slightly red as he grinned down at me. He bent and kissed my forehead. He sat with me until I managed to fall asleep.


I came in and out of consciousness while my body fended off the illness within me. Every time I opened my eyes I saw Dag watching over the others and me. I was grateful to him. I owed him my life. Guin seemed to be doing as well as me, which wasn't saying a lot. Though my cough had improved my other pains had remained the same. I had just woken up from a short rest when I heard the tarp covering the end of the wagon move and someone knelt next to me. I turned expecting to see Dagonet but was surprised when it was someone else.

"Tristan…" I said looking up at him. He just looked at me. "Ah, I've been meaning to thank you for staying with me the first night."

"You're welcome. I'm sorry I haven't seen you since." He replied.

"You have things to do." I smiled.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"I have my moments." I told him just as a coughing fit started. I was slightly embarrassed. "Sorry."

"Don't apologize." He said putting the back of his hand on my forehead. His brows furrowed.

"I'm tough." I told him. "I'll be all right."

His eyes met mine but his expression didn't change. He turned and left the wagon. I was disappointed with his sudden departure but he soon returned with a bowl of steaming water. I smiled at him and he returned it with his own as he sat next to me. He pulled the furs down and slowly exposed my chest, without taking advantage.

"This will help. It's an old remedy." He told me as he rung out a rag and placed in on my chest. A soothing feeling filled my nostrils as warmth flowed through me. "Take deep breaths."

I listened to him and was surprised as to how soothing the feeling was. It made my eyelids heavy. I tried to stay awake but Tristan had his arm around me and was gently caressing my arm making me soon fall asleep.

The sky was dark when I woke up and Tristan was still sitting with me, asleep. I was surprised as to how good I felt. It seemed like my fever may have finally broken. I turned onto my side and put my head in Tristan's lap. He shifted but didn't wake up. I put my hand on his thigh and pulled the furs around me tightly. I fell asleep again, feeling safe and content.

I woke up as Tristan moved me from his lap. I moved myself off of him and the movement made my head spin. I put my hands to my head. I closed my eyes, feeling a bit groggy. I felt Tristan's hand on my face and I looked at him. He seemed to study me, and then a smile crossed his face.

"Thank you." I told him.

"I'll see you soon." He said and left.

I fell asleep again, welcoming it. I hadn't slept so well since being in this strange place. I didn't sleep long. The wagon wasn't as smooth a ride as one might think. I shifted under my sweat soaked furs to see Dagonet looking over the boy and Arthur next to me. He was talking to Guinn. I wasn't sure what they were saying but I heard something crack, she cried in pain, and soon she was unconscious again.

"Is she alright?" I asked him. He quickly turned when he heard my voice and smiled down at me, putting his hand on my face. "Hi you." I grinned.

"We thought you weren't going to make it for a little while." He told me.

"Sorry Arthur, you can't get rid of me that easily." I told him, putting my hand over his.

"Does this mean that you trust us now?" He asked. I smiled. "Good." He said and gently caressed my cheek.

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked him.

"I hope so. You all have a lot of recovering to do." He replied.

"It's a good thing we've got the best care around." I smiled.

He smiled back and was going to say something but the tarp moved and Tristan appeared. I felt my face flush, just a little, and then I felt guilty. My feelings couldn't go past gratitude. I thought quickly of something to say and then the black horse popped into my head.

"Where's Zeus? Did you find him? He pulled away from me and took off."

Arthur grinned down at me. "He is fine. You need to worry about you for now. Leave everyone else to me."

"I'm not built that way. I worry about everyone else before myself." I told him.

"Listen to your commander and rest." Tristan told me. "I'll watch over her for a while."

Arthur nodded and gave me a look before leaving the wagon. Tristan sat next to me. I moved away from him, but he put his arm around me and pulled me close to him. I tensed briefly but I couldn't deny that I didn't want the comfort of a man holding me. I moved against him and put my arm across him. He put his hand on my back and gently caressed it. My wounds from being whipped were sore and when his finger caught one just right I yelled in pain. He quickly moved his hand and I felt his fingers find the base of my shirt and he slowly lifted it up. I felt his body tense. I reached back and moved his hand away. This time he took my hand and looked at it. He quickly took the other and saw the bends in my fingers.

"Paige…" He said.

"It's not as bad as it looks." I told him, taking my hands back.

"No, it's worse." He said, anger rising in his voice.

"I'm okay." I told him.

"No…" He said and got up.

"Tristan…" I called after him.

I listened as he walked away and soon I heard a man yell and a few gasps and screams from people nearby. I waited for him to return but he didn't come back. Once the commotion settled outside the tarp moved and Dagonet came inside. He came up to me and without saying a word he took my hands in his and frowned. He turned me onto my side and lifted up my shirt. He leaned back and sighed deeply.

"I'm fine." I told him.

"That explains why Tristan just ran through one of the soldiers." Dagonet told me.

"What?" I asked angrily. "He killed a man?"

Dagonet nodded. Feliciana, Marius's wife, walked in with a bowl of steaming water. Dagonet had me turn onto my side and he cleaned up the wounds on my back, some making me yell in pain. Dag was as gentle as he could be and while he tended to me he never said a word.

"How's the boy?" I asked, breaking the silence, knowing that he had been taking care of him.

"He's improving." He replied.

"That's good. That's very good." I said and looked at him not too far from my feet.

"Lucan is his name." Dag told me.

"He's lucky to have you looking out for him." I told him. "Just like me." I smiled over my shoulder as he worked. He grinned at me.

I kept as still as possible as I endured his healing. He scrapped the dirt and debris from the trenches the whip left. It hurt like hell but once it was done they already felt better. I stayed on my side. Not wanting to endure the pain lying on my back would cause.

"Now your hands." He told me.

I gave him an uneasy look as I put my hands in his. He gently rubbed the top of them, looking at each one.

"I'm going to have to put them back in place." He told me.

I nodded. "I know."

"I'm sorry." He said sadly.

"Just be a quick as you can." I told him.

He nodded and one by one snapped my fingers back into place. The feeling that rushed through them made up for the pain that came with it. I could move my fingers again, even though it hurt to do so. Dag held me against him as I waited for the pain to die down, my hands shaking heavily. Once the pain had dulled to a tolerable measure he talked with me until he was called away. I watched him leave before slowly rolling partially onto my side, supporting myself on my forearm. The world spun but I ignored it. I built up as much strength as I could and quickly pushed myself up onto my hands and knees. I was up for only seconds before I fell to the side, slamming into the side of the wagon. I yelled in pain, louder than I had wished. The pain took my breath away and I lay there taking shallow breaths to wait out the wave of pain.

"What are you doing?"

I looked at the entrance to the wagon to see Tristan. "Nothing, I'm fine." I told him.

"You don't have to be brave." He told me, kneeling next to me. He gripped my arm, steadying me.

"Don't touch me." I told him as tears filled my eyes. I closed them and the tears fell down my cheeks.

"Let me help you." He told me.

"I…I just…" I said and looked at him. His face softened and he nodded.

"I know." He told me.

"You don't know." I told him shaking my head. "You don't know."

"I know." He told me and gently forced me to lie down.

"I miss him Tristan. I miss him so much." I told him. Tristan just looked at me with a blank look. "I miss him and I trust you. I feel guilty and yet I feel happy." I told him. "I'm so confused. My body is painful and tired. I don't know what I'm going to do." The tears were a steady stream.

Tristan pulled me against him. I held him tight and cried into him. Everything had fallen apart. Even though I was saved I was unable to do anything. I had all this time to lay there and think about everything and in one moment of weakness it took hold of me and got the best of me. Derek, the dungeon, the men…all of it. Tristan laid next to me and pulled me tight against his body. I never expected him to show any weakness to me. Emotion that I didn't think he had in him. But he was more comforting now than anyone had been yet. He didn't say anything. He simply held me and let me cry into him. That is what I needed. I vented to him as I sobbed and he still remained silent and just listened, only responding when it was absolutely necessary. When my tears finally stopped he still held me. He put his fingers through my hair and kissed my forehead. I held tight to him, just wanting to be close to someone. I was so insecure and broken that every moment to the next was a new extreme.

I couldn't have asked more from Tristan, or any of the men. I didn't know them well and yet the more time I spent with them the more I felt like they were old friends. Once I had calmed down I looked Tristan in his eyes.

"Thank you." I whispered.

"You're welcome." He whispered back.

"Who knew you could be so sweet."

"Even I have my moments." He told me. I gave a small laugh. "You're fingers appear to be better." He said taking my hand in his.

"They are." I said, butterflies in my stomach. His touch made me shiver.

"Are you cold?"

"A little." I replied.

He pulled another fur onto me. "Better?"

"Much." I smiled, he returned it. The butterflies flied faster.

"You need to rest. You still have a lot of healing to do." He told me.

"Will you stay with me?" The words were out of my mouth before I had even thought about them. He nodded. "Thank you." I whispered.

"You're welcome." He whispered back.


When I woke up he was gone. I lifted my torso and supported myself on my forearm. I was waiting for dizziness to take me but it only lasted a few moments and the world righted itself. There was still a slight pounding in my head but that was bearable. I looked at my hands and my fingers already felt better, though they still looked like shit. I pushed myself up and sat there facing the opening of the wagon. I wanted to go to the opening and look around. I was sick of lying there. I got up thinking I could make it but my legs were still weak and pain shot through my body from my wounds. I didn't call out but I sighed and got back under my furs to keep warm, disgusted that I was still bedridden. But I had caught the attention of Lancelot as he stepped into the wagon from his horse.

"Paige?" He said concerned.

"Hello." I smiled at him.

"Are you alright?" He asked kneeling next to me.

"I'm fine." I told him, putting my hand to my head.

He put his hand to my forehead and then down my face. "You're fever is much lower." He told me. He lifted up my shirt and looked at the scabbing holes. "What did they do to you down there?" He asked.

"You name it, they did it. But I really don't want to relive it quite yet." I told him. He nodded. "How are you doing?" I asked. "I haven't really talked to you much."

He smiled sweetly. "It's a shame really." He said and paused. "I wish we didn't have all of these people with us." He told me honestly. "They're slowing us down. I would have left the girl and the boy." He told me honestly.

"Would you have left me?" I asked.

"Of course not." He said without hesitation.

"Then what's the difference? One or many, you're doing a good thing here. Just think of how these people are grateful for what you're doing for them. You're giving them a chance at life and that's all anyone wants." I told him. "You're a better man than you think."

"I doubt that." He grinned at me.

"You are." I told him.

"Rest." He told me and left the wagon.

I watched him go, thinking better of him, then noticed Guinevere smiling at me. "Hey!" I said quietly. "How are you feeling?" I asked her.

"Better…" She replied. "And you?"

"I'm going to be fine. Lucan is going to be okay too." I told her.

"That's good. He deserves to live."

"Yes he does. He has too much life ahead of him to deserve any of this." I replied. She nodded. "How are your hands?"

"Arthur fixed them for me."

"Dagonet did mine." I told her. "At least we're out of there. That's all that matters."

"I didn't think the day would come." She told me sadly.

"You and me both." I smiled.

Soon Fulcinia came in with food and water. She had to help with the water and I don't think it has ever taken me so long to eat or drink in my life. But once the food was in I could feel the improvement. My body was starting to recover and I was starting to feel like myself again. Moving was still difficult but that would come in time. I did need to rest, and once the food and water was gone I felt extremely tired. Guinn was already asleep as well as Lucan. I watched the two of them for a short while before falling asleep myself.


When I woke up the sky was dark and Tristan was sitting next to me. He was asleep. I smiled and gently touched his hand. He didn't wake up. I ran my fingers down his. I smiled, lonely for Derek and yet having Tristan so near was comforting. I didn't want to move on as fast as the past few days had seemed to show. The feeling in my stomach when he looked at me. The gentleness of his touch. I wanted it more than I could say. But it was meaningless. My loneliness was making me feel things and want things that I shouldn't.

I rolled onto my side, facing the wall. I felt Tristan wake but I closed my eyes hoping he would think me asleep. I felt his hand touch my face before he got up and left the wagon. I couldn't sleep and my emotions were so confused. I wanted Tristan to stay with me. I wanted him and the guilt I felt made me sick. I managed to convince myself that the feelings weren't real, that I was just displacing my grief. The thought stayed with me through the night. When the sun came up Fulcinia came in with food and water. They went down easier than before but the amount I managed to get in wasn't enough to sustain me for long. Afterward I laid and rested, wanting my bodily pain to cease. I was antsy and so fed up with lying there that shortly after our nourishment I pulled a fur tightly around me and made my way to the front of the wagon. I sat on the edge and looked around. There was now snow covering the earth as we took the mountain trail. I pulled the fur around me tighter hoping the air would clear my mind. Only a moment later Tristan had rode his horse next to me.

"Hey stranger." I grinned at him.

"Beautiful maiden, may I convince you to take a ride with me?" He grinned back.

I was going to reply when Arthur rode up. "Tristan." Tristan nodded and sent his Hawk into the sky. I glared at Arthur but he just smiled at me. I sighed and leaned against the wagon, the motion of it was calming. I started to hum Avril's song again, unknowingly drawing the attention of the knights.

"What's that you're humming?" Dagonet asked, riding his horse next to me.

"Just a song I like." I smiled at him.

"She sang it for Lucan and me." Guinn said appearing from the back, sitting next to me. "When we were in the dungeon." She told him.

"Did she now?" Gawain said coming up on the other side with Galahad.

"Sing it to us." Galahad told me.

"No, I can't." I told him. "I really can't sing."

"She's right. She can't sing. But the song was comforting." Guinn told them.

"Paige, please sing it to us." Dag said sweetly, tempting me to agree.

"She sings?" Bors said coming up. I shook my head. "Come, sing us a song."

"Bors…" I said and looked at him. "I can't sing. I'm not going to, so just drop it."

"Sing it for me." I looked down the side of the wagon and saw Tristan walking up.

"I thought you had things to do." I replied.

"I finished it. The road is still clear back there." He told me. "Sing the song for me."

I just looked at him. It was embarrassing enough in the dungeon. "No." I told him and went back into the wagon. Guinn followed me and I laid down, wrapping the furs around me.

"I am sorry." Guinn told me.

"It's fine." I told her, closing my eyes.

"I didn't mean anything by it." She said.

"I'm not mad. I'm just not going to sing. I'm not any good at it and I don't usually sign up to embarrass myself." I told her. "I'm just really tired."

"Okay." She said and I heard her leave the wagon.

There was movement in the wagon again. "Guinn, please…" I said but when I looked at the entrance Tristan was there. "What is it?" I asked him.

"I didn't mean to push you." He said coming up to me.

"It's fine. I'm tired and would really like to be alone." I told him.

"You're lying." He replied.

"What?" I asked him frowning.

"You know as well as I that you want me here." He told me with a small smile.

"Are you always this full of yourself?" I asked with a raised brow.

I moved to leave the wagon but he grabbed my arm. "Paige…"

"Don't make me regret trusting you or the other men." I told him.

"Tell me why you are so angry."

"You know why." I told him, pulling my arm from him.

I moved from the wagon and gave a whistle. My black horse trotted into view. I slid onto his back and turned him toward the woods. I leaned low against him as he picked up speed, weaving through the trees. I could hear hooves behind me. Someone was coming after me. I rode him hard and when his breath came fast from his mouth I let him stop and I walked him along the stream we had stopped by. The horse behind us had caught up and I looked behind us to see both Tristan and Dagonet riding up. I took a deep breath and tried to keep my cool.

"Stop." Tristan demanded.

"Paige." Dag said.

I ignored them as I kept Zeus moving.

"Please." I heard Dag say.

I relaxed and Zeus stopped to nibble on a nearby tree. I sighed and turned on the horses back so I could face them.

"I am not a prisoner. I am not one you can command. I am me and I do what I want when I want. Nothing you can do or say will stop me. I stayed willingly this time but I've stayed too long. I'm getting attached and I can't do that. I just lost Derek. I'm not going to dishonor his memory by moving on too fast." I told them. Both of them just looked at me. "I need to find a way home."

"There is no way home." Tristan told me.

"You don't know that." I told him.

"Please, just come back with us. We'll figure it all out then." Dagonet pleaded.

"You'll have to catch me first." I told him and turned Zeus away from them, kicking him forward.

They pursued me as I raced through the trees, turning further and further away from the caravan and deeper into the woods. At one point Tristan pulled up next to me. I looked at him and a small smile crossed his face. It was a game to him. My anger bubbled and I whispered in Zeus's ear to go faster, gently stroking his neck. I heard him nicker softly and felt his muscles tighten as his legs moved faster, pulling ahead of Tristan. We raced through the trees, leaping over logs, climbing small ledges. I was confident that I could pull away and run. But it all disappeared when we rounded a bend and a large embankment appeared. Zeus skidded but the snowy ground made it impossible to stop. We tried to round the corner but Zeus couldn't get good traction on the snow. He fell to the side and I slipped from his back. We both tumbled down the hill. A branch hit my side and pain erupted. I couldn't stop myself and the hill seemed to be never ending. I managed to glance down the hill and the bottom was near. I thought I was finally going to stop when I hit the bottom and instead of stopping I went right through the snow, the ground gave way and I fell, hitting an icy bottom hard. Pain seared through my body. I heard Zeus's cry above me. My vision was blurred as I gasped to get my air back. When my breathing finally normalized I looked up to see a break in the ceiling of wherever I was. There were icicles hanging everywhere and mounds of ice surrounding me. I could hear my name being called in the distance. I was shivering from the cold and the shock from the fall. I saw light at the end of the cave and I quickly made my way toward it. There was a small hole in the ice cave. It was a tight fit by I forced my way out into the sunlight. In the process I cut my side on a shard of ice. I heard Zeus cry and above me I could see his black form running back and forth. I couldn't see Tristan or Dagonet. I looked at the earth and could see the red that I was leaving behind. Great. I thought and whistled. Zeus stopped and I could see his ears perk. I whistled again and he came to the edge and quickly made his way down the hill. He moved next to me and his nose moved into my open hands.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

I gave him a thorough look over. He appeared to be all right.

"Okay, come on." I said and walked away from the danger zone.

I walked adjacent to the slope but I couldn't see a way up no matter how far I walked. It was too steep for the horse and I wasn't sure that even I could make it up the bank. I sighed and wasn't sure what my next move would be. I turned back toward the woods and started walking trough them. I stopped in the first clearing I came to and started to pull branches down from the trees. I tried to start a fire but it wasn't going very well. Zeus was very antsy and it wasn't helping me any. Every time I moved pain was felt that made my breath catch in my throat. I gave up and leaned against a tree. I closed my eyes and relaxed so the pain would dull a little. I didn't remember falling asleep.


When I woke up I could barely open my eyes. I was shaking uncontrollably. I was still lying in the snow and Zeus was standing over me. I tried to sit up but I was too weak. I rolled to my side, I could see red in the snow and the sun was setting fast. In the distance I could see two figures moving toward me, moving fast. Tristan was the first to dismount and rush over to me.

"Paige…?" He said putting his hand on my face.

"What took you so long?" I managed to get out with a small smile.

"We didn't want to end up like you." He told me. "That and we ran into a few Saxons' and that slowed us down."

"Is she all right?" Dagonet said behind him.

"She's lost a lot of blood and body heat. We need to get her warmed up." Tristan replied and picked me up in his arms.

"Zeus…" I said looking at my horse.

"I'll take care of him." Dagonet told me and tied rope to the horse.

I could hardly keep my eyes open. I tried to stay awake. Tristan moved me away from the blood soaked snow and put me under some nearby bushes. I watched him dig out an area of the snow and build a fire. The flames were bright and hurt my eyes. I closed them, frowning, but I tried to listen to what was going on. I heard them whispering and then I was being lifted again. I yelled out in pain. I felt the warmth of the flames and then I was being covered. I felt a hand on my face and then I lost consciousness.


When I woke up I was warmer and I could feel padding around my waist. I opened my eyes to see the night sky above me. I put my hand to my head and soon Tristan was looking down at me.

"Hi." He said softly. I frowned at him, not replying. "How do you feel?"

"Like I tumbled down a massive hill, fell through the ground into a cave thing, then cut my side open on a piece of ice. Not to mention lying in the cold snow until my body was nearly numb. That's how I feel." I told him.

"Oh good, you remember what happened." Tristan said lightly.

I just looked at him before I smiled. "I remember."

"You had us worried for a while there." Dagonet told me.

"Sorry." I replied. "Did I hear something about Saxons before I passed out? What was all that about?"

"That's what took us so long to find you." Tristan told me.

"I just was starting to get better." I told him. "I'm so stupid." I said shaking my head. "Just when things are starting to get better I find a way to mess it all up."

"You don't see us leaving you behind do you?" Tristan asked.

"You should. Just leave me behind. It'll save you some grief." I replied. Tristan's eyes met my own and the look he gave me made me smile. I nodded at him and his fingers ran down my arm.

"Are you warm enough?" Dagonet asked.

"No, I still feel cold." I replied.

Tristan looked like he was thinking before he pulled the few furs that were covering me back and moved next to me.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"Body heat." He replied.

"I don't think that's a good –" I said but he pulled me against him.

My head was on his arm. He was gently playing with my hair. I could feel his breath on my neck. Instead of warming me up goosebumps formed on my skin. I closed my eyes. I was uncomfortable. His arms were strong around me and as much as I wanted to deny it I felt safe in his arms. I relaxed and soon I started to fell warmer.

"Better?" He asked.

"Actually, yes." I replied.

"That was a stupid stunt you pulled." He told me.

"I know." I told him, looking him in the eyes. "I just can't handle all of this."

"You can, you just won't." He replied.

I would have gotten defensive, telling him that he was wrong but he wasn't. He wasn't wrong. I wasn't dealing with any of it. Just wanting to move forward and forget what had happened.

"I know." I finally said.

He looked at me sweetly and gently caressed my face. "Derek wouldn't hate you for wanting to be happy. For wanting to move on. He wouldn't want a woman like you to be alone just because he wasn't here."

"I know." I said again.

"So let yourself feel again. Don't turn to stone."

"I'm trying."

"I know." He replied.

He put his forehead to mine and my hand moved to his face. I hadn't expected anything but his face moved closer and his lips met mine. It was short and sweet and felt better than I was going to admit just yet.

"Now rest." He told me, holding me tighter.

I sighed and closed my eyes. I still felt tired and moments later I was asleep again.