Finding safety and security in those strong arms looking into the soft green eyes. " adam" I whispered as I felt him pick me up and we began to wander along the now white halls. Everything was back to normal everything was fine when I was in his arms. Watching as we wandered I saw him turn into a room then I was placed back down my bed. Watching as he left I looked down. The noises began to come back, did they honestly think I was safe here by myself. Memories passed before my eyes as tears rolled down my face. Saw the bed I saw the blood. It was never ending the emotional wounds only digging deeper sending more blood to taint my mind. I saw his brown eyes as they grinned harshly at me. I could feel the hands roaming my body again, it was all happening again and all I wanted it to do was end.
Memories consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again
I scrambled off my bed as the images flashed around me I just wanted some one here for me someone who wouldn't use my emotions against me, someone I could trust. I wanted someone who would be there and would stand by my side even at the most drastic of my states. But I knew that would never happen there was no one that could understand, there was no one that would put up with that. No matter how much I hope for it I knew it would never happen. What was there left for me. What had I to live for why did they bother reviving me no one wants me here, I was unloved and un needed. Why did I exist was it just to take up space? I still couldn't remember what caused me to become the thing I am today, but I know I am not supposed to be this but I need somebody's help to change the way I am. I was lost in this bottomless pit slowly sinking lower I don't think anyone could save me now.
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
Crawling towards the white door I turned the lock and closed my eyes tears running down my face why did people have to keep saving me it only brought me back to the pain. I couldn't take it anymore, the pain was getting worse every breath broke a new fresh piece of flesh to my lungs sending blood spewing into my breathing. I would drown in my own blood and givin. Every moment tore my skin sending me into a new wave of pain. This was it I wanted the pain to end. Reaching for the needles I clutched my cure. Looking at the black liquid I prepared myself this would be it.
Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I had no options left again
I heard the door break down and looked up at see adam, his eyes widened when he spotted the needle in my hand. " p-please alex just put the needle down" he said moving closer the needle dropped from my grasp and clattered to the floor. Tears flooded my face as he pulled back up into his arms I sobbed into his strong musculear chest letting out all of the built up pain. I wished I could stay here forever in these arms I just wanted to let go and let everything I just wanted to let him hold me to help me through this pain. But I knew he wouldn't , no one ever would. No one wanted to hold dear something so broken. But then why was he here? Why did he act like he care? Was it even remotely possible that he really did? Was it possible we were meant for each other? Had I finally found my night in shiny armour? Looking up into those now soft green eyes I realized I had. I would be safe here. Safe from any manor of danger. I could stay locked in this tight grip for eternity. I was saved. A smile panted itself across my face, the first true smile that had been up there for awhile, I was truly happy to be here in this mans grip. To feel safe against his chest. Here I was home. He lifted me up and placed me atop the bed stroking my hair, softly I drifted into a sleep calmness washing over me.
I was home.
