Chapter 8
The morning sun poked through the slats in the blinds and shone on the couple curled up in bed. The warmth of Amanda's body curved into his gave Sam an intense satisfaction as he awoke. His right arm pillowed her head and the other was draped over her side. His hand rested underneath her. He didn't want to wake her, yet he wanted to love her again. Unable to break himself from the magic of last night, he placed a feather light kiss on her shoulder.
Amanda was awake before Sam. She just enjoyed the stillness of the morning lying in his protective cocoon. When he kissed her shoulder, she couldn't pretend anymore. With a sly smile, she rolled onto her back and gave him a look so laden with love that he took it as an invitation to dive into her lips. He covered her with kisses and his body, and she opened up and freely gave herself to him. It felt as good as the night before, as so many other times in the past. Their bodies had changed, not always for the better, but they still fit together as seamlessly as when they were young.
She knew sometime during the night that this wasn't just coincidence that she remembered so much. It was meant to be for her to come back to Sam. He'd changed. She'd changed. When she left him, she thought she would never be able to love him again. Hate burrowed into her heart and she let it fester until the past two weeks showed her that she still loved him, even more so now because Sam Axe had become the man she'd hoped to marry all those years ago. There was only one thing that still bothered her.
She looked up at him, and he noticed something like a question forming in her expression. "Amanda, what is it?"
"Sam... I can't remember. Are we still married?"
"What?" His eyes widened, but then his look of surprise turned to one of joy. He laughed. "You remember. Amanda, you remember that we were married!"
"Were?" She frowned.
"Yeah, well, uh, we still are, actually." He chuckled. "I never did anything about it."
"Me neither!" She grasped his arms. "This is so totally nuts. Today I wake up and I remember everything." Her hand moved to his face. "I remember how we met, the dates we went on, the first time we made love... all of it."
"The good and the bad?" His brow wrinkled.
She nodded. "The good and the bad." Tears sprung to her eyes and she blinked them away.
"I'm sorry, Amanda. The way I treated you was so wrong."
"I really hated you for a long time. But I used that emotion and determined that I would learn to be self-sufficient. I had to prove to myself that I didn't need some heartbreaking man to ruin my life. I could do just fine on my own." She gave him a wry smile.
"So there was never anyone else?"
"I didn't say that. I just didn't get married because I had this stupid marriage still hanging over my head!" She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh Sam, that's not..."
He laid himself beside her and said, "It's okay, I completely understand. I felt the same way. I came close to marrying another woman once, but our marriage was a roadblock and she dumped me even before I could try to get it resolved, and then I realized that she wasn't the right woman. Not if she could give up that easily."
"Was that Elsa?"
"No." Sam shook his head. "Her name isn't important." He reached out and smoothed her hair. It stood up in places and snarled with other locks, but she was still the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. "Manda, baby, none of those other women meant anything to me and now I know why." Emotion choked him up and he blinked to keep the tears from falling. "It's because you never left my heart. You were always there, Amanda. I love you so much."
He captured her lips and held her face in his hands. Amanda's hands ran down his back as she pressed into him.
"I've loved you all these years, Sam. I couldn't get you out of my heart no matter how hard I tried." She was almost out of breath. "I'm so glad we never got divorced."
"Me too, Manda." He smiled. "Me too." He kissed her and she responded greedily as if she would never get enough of him.
Amanda delighted in watching Sam fall asleep in her arms. He was definitely older, with character lines he hadn't owned when they were young, stupid, and vessels of raging hormones. Somehow the good Lord knew what he was doing when he put them together, but it was their own selfishness that broke them apart. She was glad for the chance to start again. She didn't care anymore if her full memory came back or not. She remembered the things that really mattered.
Her stomach rumbled, and Amanda recalled that she hadn't eaten much last night. She was too fixated on Sam and Michael's stories and studying her man as he interacted with his friends. Yes, he'd matured into a fine person. Amanda couldn't wait to spend the rest of her life with him.
As a token of her love and appreciation for everything Sam had done up to that point, she got up, wrapped herself in a robe, and went to the kitchen to make breakfast. While the eggs were cooking, she walked around the small house and imagined what it would be like to live there with Sam. Maybe his friend Barry would let them buy the place. It was kind of cute. It reminded her of the cottage they rented near the naval base.
In the living room, she found Sam's laptop sitting on an end table. Underneath lay a file folder. Amanda opened it and found a report on her written by Michael. She didn't want to pry, but if this had anything to do with her, she had a right to know, didn't she? She skimmed it and the details brought back more memories, ones she wanted to forget. Anson's face flashed in her mind. She knew who he was, heard his name in her head. She shook it away. The photographs and other information caused more visions to come at rapid speed until the tears obscured her view. She slammed the file closed and dropped it on the table, covered it with the laptop and returned to the kitchen where the eggs were burning.
Through her veil of tears, Amanda turned off the heat and pushed the skillet to the back burner. She couldn't do this. No, no matter how much she remembered, she couldn't go back there. Anson was gone, anyway. What good would it do to fulfill her mission? She'd already come to that conclusion before, and that's why the men on the boat took her on that cruise. The plan was to shoot her and dump her body for the sharks to feed on, and someone else would take her place. She couldn't let that happen. Amanda would rather die than let the last remnant of the organization that wanted them dead execute Sam and his friends.
"Amanda?"
She turned and blinked until she could see Sam clearly again. He stood in the kitchen arch dressed in his robe. She could see that he hurt for her, but he didn't know why. Part of her wanted to push past him and run away, but she was more useful to Sam and his friends if she stayed put. She knew where the others were, and with Michael and Fiona's help, she and Sam could take them down.
"Sam. I... I was supposed to kill Michael, and you. But I can't. I can't do it!" She broke down from the intensity of her love for him and the pressure of what was at stake for her if she didn't follow through.
He stood in the doorway gaping at her, but the moment Amanda dropped her head in her hands and wept, he rushed forward to hold her tight against him. "Shh, it's okay, honey. It's okay. You remember, this is good."
"But you don't get it. I was supposed to kill you and Michael... and Fiona if I could. Anson wanted you all dead." She looked up at him.
He pushed the damp hair away from her face. "Well, Anson is dead, and you don't have to worry about him anymore. If there's anyone else left in his organization and you know where they are, we'll take care of them. I promise." He pulled her head against his chest. "I won't let anything happen to you, and if you have my back, nothing will stop us."
It felt good when she latched her arms around his waist. Her tears were warm on his chest. He kissed the top of her head and wouldn't let go until she settled down.
Her hand went to the spot where she'd dampened the lapel of his robe and she looked up at him with a shaky smile. "I'm sorry, I got you wet."
"I've gotten wet before. I don't melt." He tucked a finger under her chin and lifted her lips to kiss them briefly. "You don't either. I just know you're tough as nails, Amanda, and we're going to make a formidable team with Mike and Fi. And if our friend Jesse can pry himself away from his day job, we'll have quite the group." He glanced over her head at the ruined breakfast. "Please, don't tell me you forgot how to cook."
She laughed. "No, I just had a mishap when I started remembering more stuff."
"No problem." He patted her on the behind and said, "Go get yourself together. I'm going to call Mike and Fi, and we'll meet at Carlito's for breakfast and talk about this latest development."
One more kiss on the lips, and Amanda's steps were so light, she almost skipped to her room to pick up some clothes and retreat to the bathroom. She heard Sam's voice in the kitchen.
"Yeah, Mike, something really big has come up with Amanda. We all need to get together and talk. Uh huh, meet you at Carlito's in an hour."
Fiona saw the couple first as Sam and Amanda walked down the sidewalk hand in hand half a block away. Amanda said something to Sam and ducked behind him to look into a store window, causing him to spin around or risk having his arm twisted. The two conversed and Amanda's smile was wide. Sam just looked happy to be with her. He said something and pulled her away from the window, then moved his arm around her shoulders. She snaked her hand around his waist and the two shared a brief kiss before continuing toward the cantina.
"I haven't seen him that happy since Veronica." Michael reacted with a soft voice.
"I know." Fiona had a dreamy tone in hers. "Isn't it grand?"
"So, that's the real Mrs. Axe, huh," Jesse said as he studied the two.
"Yeah."
Jesse nodded. "They make a cute couple."
Sam led Amanda to the table, and they wore matching grins as they greeted Michael and Fiona. Then Sam turned her toward Jesse. "Amanda, this is Jesse Porter. Jesse, this is Amanda... my wife."
Jesse didn't think it was possible for Sam to grin any wider, but he did when he mentioned Amanda's status. "It's a pleasure." Jesse stood and shook her hand, and the three sat at the table. "So, you guys are still legally married?"
"We are," Sam replied. "Neither of us ever did anything to end our marriage."
"Why not? No offense, but most people would want to get the paperwork done as soon as possible."
Amanda sat a chair and Sam took the one to her left. "Once I realized that Sam wasn't coming back, I just wanted to move on and get over him. I figured it was too big of a hassle to locate him and spend money on an attorney to get it done." Amanda grimaced. "That and I also didn't see myself getting that serious with another man again, so what was the point?"
Fiona was about to open her mouth to ask a question, but Michael beat her to it. "I know we'd all like to hear about what you remember, but we really need to get down to this business Sam was talking about on the phone."
"We should at least find out how she got into the NSA and worked for Anson, Mike." Sam disagreed.
"I promise I'll make it quick, Michael." Amanda gave him a thin smile. "Sam told me how you are about getting down to brass tacks."
The server stopped at the table and took their orders for drinks and breakfast, then moved away. Feeling comfortable that no one outside their group was listening, Amanda continued her story.
"After Sam left, I got really angry. I decided I wasn't going to just sit around and cry about it. I grew up and I went to college, and in my senior year there was a recruitment fair for FBI, CIA, NSA, et cetera. I was a Criminal Justice major, something really new for me, but I loved it, and so I decided to look into the FBI. I don't know how I wound up at the NSA table instead, but the next thing I knew I was working for them. I was there for a long time, until a couple years ago." She took a sip of the orange juice she ordered and continued. "I had an operation go bad because of Anson. Little did I know he was setting a trap because he wanted to recruit me." A smile of regret crossed her face. "He left me with a choice: work for him, or my career was toast and he would make sure that everyone I knew would find out that I did something that I never actually did. He was a snake."
"We're well acquainted with his tactics," Fiona said.
"Why did Anson want to recruit you?" Michael looked at her with doubt still in his eyes.
"Like I said, I was angry at Sam yet. He must have found out about how I felt and decided I could be a good tool in his arsenal to take you down."
"That makes sense." Michael nodded.
"In case you're wondering, I had nothing to do with your brother's death. When that happened, I was in Antigua with the last of the teams attempting to regroup. Anson's death caused the organization to fall apart and scatter. It was then that I was told if I didn't hunt down Michael Westen and his friends and kill them all, I would be dead."
"One of my friends is your husband." Michael's eyes were steely and cold as he stared at her.
"Yes, I know." Amanda nodded. She glanced at Sam, and he squeezed her hand, encouraging her to continue. "I stood up to them and said I couldn't be responsible for the loss of innocent lives. Anson's lieutenant, a man named Pasquale Denirov, orchestrated with Tom Card to have you all killed in Panama." She smiled. "Neither of them counted on you slipping through the traps, but then, you're Michael Westen. You're almost like a super hero in the spy world."
"Thank you, I guess." He didn't expect a compliment from her.
"After you four escaped Panama, I was given one last chance to return to Miami and take all of you out. After all, the organization was running low on employees. They couldn't just kill everyone who questioned an order." She smirked.
"But you did again," Fiona said.
Amanda nodded. "I did. That's when they put me on the boat and expected I would put up with being turned into fish food. In my time with the NSA and working with a few CIA operatives under special circumstances, I learned a few things. First of all, I told them that I was pregnant, which wasn't true." She laughed. "But it made a couple of them take pause. While they stood on deck arguing about whether or not to kill me, I was tied up in the hold. I got out of my restraints and rigged up some explosives that were stored on the yacht for other purposes."
"So you blew up the yacht. Good for you." Fiona grinned.
"I had it on a timer that I also scrounged up. I tell you, they had one heck of a cache on that boat! So when it was set to go boom, I was hoping I'd be off. If not, at least there were four bad guys who weren't going to make their next assignment, and maybe after my death the NSA would realize I really wasn't that bad."
She recited this fact with such a casual tone, but it affected Sam deeply. He put his arm around her and held on tight. "I'm really glad you didn't go up with that boat."
"I think it's pretty ironic that the men I was supposed to kill happened to be on a boat not far away and they rescued me!" She leaned her head against Sam's shoulder.
"There were only three in the water." Michael said. He still looked skeptical about her story.
"I know. The fourth guy was at the helm."
"How many people are left in the organization," Michael asked.
"There are five in Antigua, although I'm sure once word got to them about the yacht going up, they'll have moved by now. The back up location was an old warehouse in the Bahamas. It's accessible by boat and on the west end of the Grand Bahama Island. The cops don't mess with the place."
"Can you show us where it is?"
"I'll be happy to." The smile she gave Michael told him that he had nothing to fear from her. "Look, I know you still don't trust me. I can see it in your eyes, Michael. Despite my dubious alliance with Anson, I'll do whatever it takes to bring the rest of his system down. I wish I could convince you that it literally made me sick once I knew what I'd gotten myself into and couldn't get myself out of it. I'm not proud of the past two years of my life."
He nodded. "I understand. But if I see you compromising our mission one bit..."
"Go ahead and shoot, because I'd never be able to live with myself if I turned on you all, especially Sam." She glanced at him and returned her attention to Michael. "It took me almost a lifetime to get back to his side. I'm not going to risk losing this opportunity."
The four glanced at each other, impressed with her conviction. Sam's grip on her never lightened up. He was proud of her.
"Mike, I think we need to get Virgil in on this one. He's got the boat that can get us to the Bahamas, and he might know where this place is," Sam said.
"My mom won't be too happy about that, but if this wipes out the last of Anson's machine, I think she'll be okay with him going along."
Their dishes arrived, and over breakfast they formulated a plan for taking down the last group of Anson's minions. It would take a day to put together the supplies necessary, and after breakfast Sam would get a map of the compound so Michael could fine tune the plan. Everyone agreed to meet again for dinner at Sam and Amanda's. Just the sound of that made the couple exchange secret smiles. When Amanda caught Fiona's glance, she noted the sparkle in the fiery Irish woman's gaze. Michael may have been overly cautious, but Fiona recognized the look of true love and loyalty.
