Chapter 8: Greater than the Mississippi Divide
Castiel followed Dean up the stairway. Dinner had been uncomfortable. Bobby still made him nervous. He could see it in the man's eyes. He was not good enough for Dean. And how could he ever make him think any different, when the truth was, he was not good enough for Dean. The night in the woods, when he had snatched Dean by the coat and yelled at him, then kissed him...he maybe had been too harsh. Too forward. Too self-assured. Castiel knew very well that he could come across as callous. He had kept his true expressions bottled up almost his whole life. He could remember Old Gabriel grabbing him by the collar at the small age of four. Castiel had loved to go outside to the courtyard. He had planted himself amongst a patch of flowers to watch the fat bumble bees fly around. Another Angel, Anna, asked him if he would play with her. The two began a pretend adventure with her collection of fairy dolls. When Old Gabriel had caught him playing with 'girl toys', he had snatched him by the collar of his jacket, pulling him right off the ground. He had lectured him on the importance of his rank and how to act and how not to act. Castiel's childhood seemed like a long string of if-something-felt-right, it must be wrong. These lessons were learned the hard way at first. By the time he was a teenager, he knew better than to ever allow himself to think the way he wanted to. Seeing Gabriel fight the system more, taught him to keep quiet. Nevertheless, all three women suggested to be his wives he had quickly denied when to his great relief, the bonding cloth had not bound them. When he made his great escape, he vowed to live how he wanted to. To love who he wanted to. But truth be told, he really did not know how. Dean made him happy. His initial gut response was to hide it. To fight it. And quickly he scolded himself to fight the old beliefs and do things he wanted. It resulted in bursts and droughts. And Bobby not having faith in him was really weighing on his mind. Maybe Dean would be better off without him complicating his life. Angels would leave Dean alone if Cas was no where near him.
He followed Dean into the biggest bedroom and gently placed the duffel bag containing several guns, hex bags, the feathers and the cloth on a dresser in the corner.
Dean nodded in approval at the salt lined windows as he sat his own bag on the floor.
Castiel sat on a chest at the foot of the bed and began untying his shoes. His thoughts were swarming louder and louder in his head. He should have just let Dean alone. Who was he to demand someone make up their mind about liking him? He was no one, that's who.
A hand on his shoulder brought his thoughts to a freezing halt. He looked up and into the most handsome face he had ever seen. Green eyes. Light brown hair. A smattering of freckles that came out more strongly in bright sunlight. And those ever-observant eyes were on him. Dean had an uncanny ability to size him up and read him in an instant.
"Where are you?" Dean asked in a husky whisper. It was so honest and open. Unlike the Dean he had dealt with from the time he chain spelled to Sam until their moments on the couch. Castiel would never forget the change in Dean's eyes from when he had laid down on that couch in anger and the next morning, waking in his arms. The green was like sun-baked grass. Warm, soft, inviting. His tense moods had given way to a man who was relaxed. Castiel had let himself think that he had made Dean better. Made him happy. Then reality set in. Dean did not return from the store. Castiel thought he would lose his mind. All he wanted was Dean back. In his arms. His green eyes shining. His mouth smirking.
When he finally had him back, half drugged and mostly unconscious, Castiel could only hold him tight. He held on to him, holding him in his lap to be as close as he possibly could. All the while, Bobby was obviously not saying something. His eyes judged him and Gabriel both. Dinner tonight had confirmed what Bobby had thought. He was no good for Dean. And Gabriel was no good for Sam. Angels were no good.
"Cas?" Dean said gently, squatting in front of him.
"Sorry," Castiel said, looking away from Dean's handsome face. "I just have much to think about."
Dean's hand slid down his arm and sat warm along his hip, the other hand taking ahold of his. "Like what?"
Castiel studied their two hands together. How did something so mundane as two hands look so beautiful together? And the feel of Dean's warm skin on his was intoxicating. Suddenly the thoughts shifted. Castiel was not intoxicating. He was toxic.
His eyes snapped up to Dean's, Dean's chin tipping up slightly as his eyebrows creased in question.
"I need to take the cloth back to them. We do not all need to go. I can return it."
Dean's mouth dropped open slightly. "No way!"
"I won't subject you to them again!" Castiel swore, squeezing Dean's hand.
"And what good is going alone?" Dean asked, eyes darkening to a murky anger.
Castiel did not want to make anyone angry. While he had worn his smile through dinner, he was much more rattled than he would let on. He would say whatever he needed to, to ease Dean's mind. "Okay, I will take Gabriel with me. We can return it."
"What?" Dean snapped, releasing Castiel's hand like an opening spring trap and unfolding to his full height. "No."
"Dean,"
"Oh no," Dean waved him off, pacing. "You and Gabriel are both still wanted by those douchebags! What's going on?" Dean stopped, his eyes tearing into him. Castiel dropped his gaze to avoid the scrutiny.
"Is this about Bobby?" Dean asked.
Damnit. Castiel opened his mouth to hedge the thought and Dean shoved his hands in his pockets turning away.
"Damnit, Bobby," Dean swore softly. "He means well, Cas." Dean turned back, squatting in front of Castiel again. His hands gripped Castiel's knees as his eyes searched and held Castiel's. "He just cares. A lot. And working with Angels is taking him a minute to wrap his head around. But he will, Cas."
Castiel nodded, wanting to believe that, but the man's eyes haunted him.
Dean sighed heavily, his head dropping down onto his own hands. "Caaaas," Dean groaned.
Castiel pushed a smile into his lips. "I'm sure things will be fine, Dean."
"Be fine?" Dean asked. "What's that supposed to mean?" Dean's voice was rising and anger was hardening his face. "You're not going anywhere without me! So don't think up some crazy scheme to leave here and try to handle this shit on your own."
Cas swallowed hard. He had not expected this level of resistance. "Dean, I won't do that." It was a lie. But it was what Dean needed to hear. He did not like doing this, but he knew Dean well enough to know he would be hard enough to sneak away from.
A tugging buzzed in his mind.
"Do you promise?" Dean asked, eyes intense.
"I promise," Cas said. A nauseous wave made Cas squint and sweat start to break out on his forehead.
"Cas?" Dean asked, a slight worried look coming over his face.
An insistent knock sounded at the door. "Dean!" Came Sam's voice.
Dean stood, glancing to the door. "What?"
Sam opened the door. "What's goin' on?"
"What do you mean?" Dean asked in confusion. "Cas and I were just talking."
Sam gave Castiel a stern look. "What were you talking about?"
"Dude!" Dean yelled, hands held out and giving his brother a get-the-hell-out glare.
Sam sighed, looking at Dean. "Whatever he just told you is a lie."
"What?" Dean snapped.
"Chain spell, remember?"
Dean's face lost all its frustration, draining to a cold stare that landed heavily on Castiel. He felt his body bristle from the hard look in his eyes. He did not even ask, he just glared.
Castiel thought of several things to say, glancing at Sam, who was holding him in a stern gaze.
Castiel looked down at his hands and sighed. So much for sneaking away.
"You were gonna leave?" Dean growled.
"No," a stab of nausea made him clench his hand. "Alright...yes." The strain in his stomach unclenched and the nagging pulling in his mind cleared away. Sam rubbed at his forehead, nodding at Dean to assure his brother that that was indeed the lie.
"I'm sorry," Cas whispered, searching Dean's stony face for forgiveness. "I just want to protect you from them Dean."
"Let's get this straight," Dean said with a steely anger Castiel had never been the receiver of before, "I can take care of myself. And let's not forget that I vowed to keep you Cas. To keep you safe. But I can't keep you safe if you lie to me."
"I'm sorry," Castiel said, looking at his hands again.
"Yeah, I heard you the first time," Dean said, his voice softening. "And you're wrong. We stick together."
"Okay," Castiel said. He looked up at Dean, afraid, but needing him to believe that he was sorry. Their eyes met, but friction skirted Dean's eyes away quickly.
"I need some air," Dean said, leaving the room.
Castiel was ashamed for lying. He had lost Dean's trust for nothing. He knew he was glaring at Sam, but Sam just shook his head. "Dude, don't lie to my brother. It won't get you anywhere. And he would only kill himself trying to find you. Do us all a favor and be honest with him."
Castiel rolled his eyes. He did not need advice from Sam. Freaking Sam and his damned chain to his brain. He had ruined everything. His relationship with Dean. His plan to take care of Angel business and keep Gabriel and the Hunters safe. Anger ratcheted up like a roller coaster climbing a huge hill. Castiel grit his teeth hard.
"I was trying to protect your brother," Castiel snapped, glaring at Sam. His eyes narrowed. "If something happens to him. If something happens to any of you. Well at least we were honest about it," Cas spat bitterly.
Sam's jaw clenched. He looked like he wanted to say something, bit his lower lip and stalked out of the room.
Shit.
Castiel sighed heavily. Now he had alienated himself from everyone and yet they would all still be in danger.
Castiel sank his head into his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.
Shit.
Castiel squeezed his eyes shut. He had no idea what to think. All this because he was paranoid that Bobby might not like him. It wouldn't matter one bit if Dean hated him.
He felt an arm slide around his shoulders and a head lean against his. His hand squeezed his arm and pressed a kiss to his temple.
"Gabriel, what have I done?" Castiel clenched his hands in his own hair.
"You were trying to protect him. All of us," Gabriel reassured. "And I'm sure Dean-O-the-judgemental would have done the same in your position."
Castiel shook his head no. Dean would not lie. He may sneak off, but he wouldn't lie.
"I've ruined everything," Castiel admitted miserably.
"Come on, baby bro," Gabriel squeezed, "you just need a good night's sleep. You're going to worry yourself into another stomach ulcer."
Castiel blew out a breath, relaxing his hands, drawing them together in a ball in front of his mouth.
"You need to rest."
"I need to apologize."
"You did. Now it's his turn. Don't forget, little bro, he has to respect you too. A mistake is a mistake. If he can't get past that, then this is not what you thought."
Castiel's eyes snapped to Gabriel's. His honey brown eyes were full of kindness and openness, as always. "Gabriel...I love him."
Gabriel's eyebrows climbed and his mouth pulled into a small purse. "You think so?"
"I know so," Castiel said confidently. "I can not mess this up."
"Okay, okay," Gabriel nodded. He grabbed Castiel by the hand and pulled him to his feet. "All I know is, you're exhausted. You need some sleep. Go to bed."
Castiel nodded. He sat on the side of the bed and just ran out of steam.
Gabriel stopped leaving the bedroom, leaning against the doorframe, watching him.
"Come on," Gabriel twirled his finger with a half grin to move him along.
Castiel undid his belt and pants, pushing them down and pushing his shoes off. He sat heavily, staring. He needed to take off his overshirt. The flannel he had started wearing, since all the Keepers wore them. His mind drifted to flannels, boots, guns, shops, Keepers, Dean. Castiel had wanted so badly to fit in with the Keepers. Their shops for Clouds and shops for Hunters. The community feel that Bobby gave Keeper's Cross. He had let himself dream of being able to fit in there. And he was ruining things and he knew it.
Gabriel was tugging at his sleeve, finally coaxing him out of the soft shirt. Down to his t-shirt and boxers. Gabriel herded him into a lying position under the covers.
"It's going to be okay," Gabriel said softly. "This isn't like back home, Cassie. These guys forgive and move on."
Castiel shook his head no. He felt a tear run down his cheek. He curled tight into a ball. He was so tired of being a let down. So tired of doing the wrong things. The things that were right that were actually wrong and wrong things he had thought were right circled and tangled in his mind.
He felt Gabriel crawl into bed with him, wrapping his arms around Castiel.
"Cassie," he whispered roughly, shaking his shoulder softly, "if he doesn't forgive you, we will leave."
Castiel swatted the wet track down his cheek, wiping it dry as his jaw ached from gritting so tightly. "Don't be ridiculous. You have Sam. And you deserve to be happy too, brother."
Gabriel chuckled humorlessly, "Funny thing is, if you're not happy, then I'm not okay. You were always there for me Cassie. Always. No questions asked. Even when I was reckless, ridiculous, or wrong. You always came for me. How many nights did you come to my room and hold me until I went to sleep? Patch me up after they beat me bloody?"
"As many times as you did the same for me," Castiel muttered miserably, grabbing onto Gabriel's arms for stability as he remembered long, miserable nights from their childhood.
"This isn't the same," Gabriel said again, his grip firm. "Dean and Sam aren't like our family. Bobby either. He's just looking out for his kids. And Dean...Dean might not be as easy going as Sam. But if his heart is half as big as Sam's, he will take the time to figure you out. And you have to let him in. And figure him out. You gotta talk, Cassie."
Castiel swore to himself he would do better. Communicate. He would be more open and find out every little bit that made Dean Winchester tick. If only Dean would give him the chance.
Gabriel kissed the back of his head, carding his fingers through his hair. "Love you, Cas."
"Love you too, Gabriel," Castiel whispered. His eyes were heavy. Even as his mind spun with worry and fear, his body gave in to exhaustion.
Dean was having trouble hearing. There was an annoying buzzing in his ears as he stared down into Castiel's wild eyes.
The bastard had lied to him. He was planning on sneaking out and being some kind of goddamn martyr. He was gonna leave. Dean should have known. Nothing ever went smoothly for a Winchester. Not him anyway.
He couldn't look into those blue eyes and stay mad. And he was pissed. He looked away. Anywhere but there. "I need some air," Dean said, walking out of the room.
Sam was still staring at Cas angrily. A small part of him wanted to chase Sam away from him, but it was too small to win the fight over what he wanted more, which was to leave. He entered the hallway like a bull in a china shop, until surprisingly strong hands snatched him by the arm, turning him so his back was against the wall.
"What!" Gabriel was standing in front of him with a pinched expression and a surprisingly strong grip.
"You would do well to remember that Castiel Novak is not the asshole you are treating him like he is."
"Yeah?" Dean snapped, "Then tell him to quit being a liar."
"Well, I'll be sure to pass that on. Because you must be quite the choir boy to have never told a lie," Gabriel glared fiercely.
Dean took a breath, pinching his nose and reminding himself that Gabe and Cas were brothers. Had he seen Gabe treating Sam anything but worthy, Dean would have his head.
But Cas was wrong. And Dean was right. Right?
Dean gruffed a sigh and pulled away as Gabriel headed for Castiel. He went down the steps and back out to the porch to get some space and some air. Charlie was already back in and was curled up on the couch, earbuds jamming a song as she played a game on her phone.
He went out to the porch and just kept on walking. He needed the air. And the movement. He had felt cooped up for way too long and had not driven at all. He found a bench and sat for a while. He had thought about doing the same damn thing. But he hadn't. He wished most of all that Sam had not had to get involved. For some reason it made him twice as hesitant to admit he was wrong or to forgive Cas and move on.
Dean sighed heavily, hanging his head back in frustration, closing his eyes and crossing his arms over his chest.
His thoughts drifted from the bedroom scene to his life in general to all the small moments he had with Cas.
"Sleepin' out here?" Bobby's voice cut through his thoughts making him fully jump from his sprawled position with a mighty jerk.
"Jeez, Bobby!"
"Glad to see my stealth mode still works," Bobby grinned, sitting next to Dean who had a hand clamped over his erratically beating heart.
"Why you sleepin' outside? You in the doghouse with Colombo?"
"No. I'm not sleeping out here. And I'm not in the doghouse. Cas is."
"Huh. That was fast. What'd he do?"
Dean grimaced, not wanting to get into his love life with Bobby. Dean got to his feet and began pacing the brittle, cold grass on the ground. "It's nothing."
Bobby waited.
"He lied to me, Bobby."
"Bout what?"
"He said he wouldn't sneak off to handle this Angel deal on his own! And he was going to! Sam caught him. Good thing we got those damn chain spells. Although I'm gettin' a bunch of crap anger from Gabriel right now through mine. So, yeah. Awesome. He was gonna run off and try to make the deal so none of us got hurt!"
"Huh. Sounds like-"
"Don't even say 'me'!" Dean snapped, turning on Bobby, whose eyes widened at his stance. "And this is all your fault anyway! He thinks you don't trust him!"
Bobby looked away, chewing his lip and leaning forward.
"He coulda so easily slipped away and ended up getting killed! Just to prove himself! Again!"
"Alright, alright!" Bobby said, standing and looking at Dean hesitantly. "I said I was sorry. I get that he means well."
"Means well?!" Dean's hands were fisting in his own hair with frustration and he was pacing again. "I love that guy, Bobby!"
Bobby's eyes focused harder, his jaw closing.
"I do! And do you know how many people I have fell in love with before him? None! You wanna know why?! Because no one else gets it! No one else can keep up! And no one else-" Dean's voice dropped low, his pacing stopping, hands down at his sides in raw defeat. "No one else ever made me feel the way he makes me feel. It's not a spell. It's just him, Bobby."
Bobby nodded.
The men stood there, neither moving and neither knowing what move to make.
"Sam in the same boat with Gabe?" Bobby finally ventured gently.
"I don't know. Maybe."
Bobby scuffed his boot along the grass at his toes. "I do trust them."
Dean finally looked him in the eye. "Good. Can you let him know before he kills himself trying to prove it?"
Bobby nodded. "Trust has never been my thing, ya know? You ain't the only one grew up in this shitty Hunter-Keeper life."
"I know," Dean said, shoulders and head drooping.
"But it's no excuse. And I'll make sure he understands we're good."
Dean nodded, exchanging small smiles.
"So...love, huh?" Bobby chuckled.
"Shut up," Dean laughed, blushing profusely.
Again they stood there, watching night close down around them. At least they were back to a comfortable silence. Dean's thoughts began swirling again.
"So, how bad do you think my dad woulda flipped out about me and Cas?"
Bobby huffed a laugh. "He already knew you liked guys. He was fine with it, but you think I'm a tough sell? He would have had Gabe runnin' for the hills."
"And Cas?" Dean asked, fighting a smile, just thinking of his dad razzing Gabriel.
Bobby's look sobered. "He woulda liked Cas. He's all business when it comes to hunts. And he's bringing the Angels down to earth."
Dean smiled sadly. "Yeah."
"Sorry if I pushed things too far," Bobby said quietly.
"It's okay," Dean shrugged. "If I was better at relationships, I woulda handled things better. And Cas...he's no better than we are. God. We're a mess."
Bobby nodded and started heading inside. "Best I can offer is, don't go to bed angry."
Dean grinned as Bobby made his way inside. His eyes lifted to the dark house. Cas must have gone to bed without him. And just like that, there was no where else Dean wanted to be than in a bed. With Cas.
He made his way inside, locking up and re-salting the door. He went up the stairs as quietly as he could, pulling his jacket off and appreciating the warmly heated little house.
As he stepped into the room he and Cas were to use, he was a bit surprised with what he found. Moonlight streamed through the windows, layering the room in greys and blues. There were two figures, curled tightly together. For a few seconds, he thought he was in the wrong room. He recognized the back of Gabe's head. He was on top of the covers, shoes kicked off and an arm around the other person. Dean quickly realized the other person was not Sam. It was Cas. Cas was wound tight into a ball that seemed much too small to hold the man entirely. Gabe's arm held him tight, his hand lying limply next to Cas. Cas' face just peeked out of the covers. His hair stuck out dark and unruly, his expression pinched instead of relaxed. Both breathed gently and Dean just stood there a moment. It had been a long time since he had held his own brother like that. The last time was when Jess died. And it wasn't something he talked about. Ever. But the gesture was there. And it pulled at Dean's heart to know he was the one who had upset Cas enough to put him there. Unable to intervene, he turned to leave. He stopped in his tracks, thinking about Bobby's words. Maybe they had enough brotherly bonding to let Dean in. He did not want Cas waking up still feeling upset. He turned back to the room and rubbed Gabe's calf lightly.
"Gabe," he whispered. Gabe jerked awake, eyes blearily finding him right away. His arm clenched even more protectively around Cas for a few seconds and then he relaxed, rubbing his eyes.
"Go to bed," Dean grinned. "You're in my spot."
Gabe gave his brother a long look. Cas had not moved much and still seemed to be sleeping. Gabe slowly pulled his arm away and sat up. He turned tired, red eyes to Dean. "Are you still mad at him?"
"No," Dean assured him.
Gabe stood slowly. He turned back to Cas and then to Dean. "He meant well," Gabe whispered.
"I know."
"He...he beats himself up pretty bad when he lets people down. And my family made him feel that way all the time."
Dean pursed his lips. He did not like being put in the same category as the Angels. It was not fair at all.
"For what it's worth," Gabe said quietly, stepping toward the door, "I'm really glad you stopped him."
"Me too." The pair exchanged a weighted look. It was guarded and threatening and pleading and hoping all in the quick fleeting look. Dean nodded and Gabe left.
He took his flannel and jeans and boots off, crawling under the covers gently.
Castiel's muscles were tight. He ran a hand down his back, feeling his muscles like rocks beneath. Leaning over him slightly, he watched the scowl set in his sleeping face and wanted it gone. He ran a hand through his hair and slid his thumb down his cheek. "Cas?"
Cas' eyes flew open and he startled, much like Gabe had, scooting away in instant fear. Dean lifted his hand, letting him move and gave him a sad smile.
"Dean!" Cas gasped, his eyes closing and he visibly regained his senses. His body relaxed somewhat, still curled, and his blue eyes opened with worry.
Dean laid down and pulled him up against his chest, curling his arm around him as Gabe's had been.
Castiel relaxed hesitantly, muscle by muscle until he finally let his breath out slowly.
"Cas," Dean began, his fingers rubbing gently across Cas' chest, "I'm sorry I lost it."
Cas turned in Dean's arms, his eyes searching Dean's. "I should not have lied. Are you still mad at me?"
"No," Dean smiled. "It turns out, you're hard to stay mad at."
Cas pressed his lips into a thin line. "I won't lie to you again."
Dean ran his thumb down Cas' cheek, pausing on his chin, holding it and feeling the stubble growing in. "I overreacted, per my usual. I'm so sorry. We need to learn how to talk to each other. And Bobby told me not to let you go to sleep angry."
"He did?" Cas' eyes lifted back to Dean's.
"He did. And I need you to know, that leaving me behind is not an option. You go, I go."
Cas smiled, his body relaxing totally as he melted into Dean's arms. "Okay."
"And I won't leave you behind either," Dean said, his hand sliding up into Castiel's hair. "I promised to keep you safe. And I am. Even if that means keeping you safe from yourself."
Castiel sighed, his hands unclenching and running up around Dean's shoulders as he lifted himself up, looking down on Dean.
"I understand," Cas murmured, his mouth lowering to sit warmly on Dean's.
Dean's eyes fluttered closed, and his hands clenched into Cas' hair, pulling him deep into a kiss. Their mouths made love, slow and hot.
Dean sat up, Cas straddling his lap as they clung tightly to each other. They pulled each other's shirts off and Dean leaned back onto his hands, looking at the man perched on his lap. They both looked like they wanted to say something, but hesitated.
"Dean, I thought I had ruined everything. I thought-"
Dean stole his words with a kiss, wrapping his arms around his warm, smooth skin. "Nothing's ruined. We're gonna figure this out. Just," Dean panted, kissing him again, "just don't leave me."
"I won't," Cas panted back, kissing him rougher, pressing his hips harder into him, making Dean groan. "I'll show you. I love you, Dean."
Their mouths stuttered to a halt. Cas pulled back an inch, his eyes opening with apprehension.
"You do?" Dean grinned.
"I do," Castiel whispered.
"I love you too."
Cas tilted his head with a quirky look of wonder in his eyes. Dean smiled shyly under his heavy gaze.
Castiel's look sobered and he launched back down onto Dean, pressing him flat into the mattress and attacking his mouth with renewed flames. Dean gasped to keep up and wanted to laugh, enthralled with the man consuming him. Cas was moving his mouth down his neck, leaving a trail of molten lava. His mouth latched onto one of his nipples making him arch up into him, lifting the pair of them off the mattress before dropping back down again.
Castiel laughed, a dirty, filthy enjoyment that made Dean writhe underneath him. Castiel was now working his way down, biting along his ribs and abs.
"Shit!" Dean panted.
"Dean, can I?" Castiel asked, hair wild and eyes blown as he stopped with one hand on Dean's boxers.
"Yes. Anything yes," he answered, laughing at how freeing it was to let go and let someone ravage him so completely.
"Anything?" Cas asked, pulling the boxers away and shoving his own off.
Castiel slowed his movements again, his eyes meeting Dean's hungrily. "I want you." There was no sweet grin. No hesitation.
Dean swallowed hard. "Yeah."
"Just...let me have you," Castiel said, moving Dean's legs where he wanted them, on either side of him as he kneeled between.
"You have me," Dean said, shaking slightly at the total release of control. And it was what he wanted more than anything. He wanted to give Castiel whatever he wanted. He let his anticipations go, his control fade to nothing, and gave his body with full abandon.
Castiel took over with steady hands and constant kisses. He shook Dean apart until he wound him up so tight, Dean thought he might lose his mind. Then he proceeded to shatter his world in ecstasy.
When Cas dropped onto Dean's chest, shaking and sweaty from his own release, Dean held him tight. Their breathing evened and Cas finally pulled away, cleaning them up.
With one last kiss, Cas wound his arms around Dean's chest, his head pillowed by the smooth rise and fall of Dean's chest.
"I love you," Cas said quietly for the fiftieth time that night.
"I believe you," Dean grinned. He felt lighter than air and enveloped in warm happiness. "I love you too, Cas."
The next morning, Dean woke to silky, smooth hair in his face. The sun was full and bright and Dean hid his eyes in the back of Castiel's hair.
"Mm," Cas mumbled, burrowing deeper into Dean's chest. Dean squeezed him in tighter. The morning had to be late, but the house still sat quiet. He breathed out a contented breath and nuzzled into the back of Castiel's neck. They drifted back to sleep in a haze.
Dean woke to wet, open mouthed kisses on his neck that made him squirm and laugh. "Cas! Stop!"
Cas leaned up onto one elbow, watching Dean wake up with a grin.
"It's almost one in the afternoon," Cas mused.
"Really?" Dean was shocked. It was rare he ever slept that late.
"Really," Cas grinned. "We must have needed the sleep."
"I did," Dean yawned and stretched, feeling Cas slide his hand along his ribs.
"We really should get up though. Everyone else seems to be up."
"Yeah." Dean pulled Cas down for a chaste kiss. "It seems so wrong to ever leave this bed though."
Cas grinned. "We will just have to find another bed tonight."
Flashes of Cas inside him made Dean flush all over. "I could just kick my own ass for every night I spent close to you and not close enough."
Cas dipped his head, grinning. "We have time."
"I know. But still. What took me so long?"
Cas shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know. But I was in love with you when you still thought my name was Jimmy."
Dean laughed. "I never for a second believed your name was Jimmy!"
"What?" Cas laughed, "I think I was pretty clever for being damn near dead!"
"Alright, I'll give you a pity vote for that."
Their eyes held steady for several beats until Cas leaned down and kissed him.
A sudden pounding on the door made both of them jerk.
"What!" Dean barked.
"Let's get a move on!" Came Sam's annoyed voice.
"Five minutes," Dean groaned.
"One!" Sam snapped back.
Dean smiled up at Cas, kissing him soundly and then they both crawled out of bed.
As they loaded the van for the annoying task of driving back toward Philadelphia, no one spoke much. And if Dean didn't know any better, he was sure no one was looking him in the eye. He scowled softly, wondering what was going on.
They all made their way out to the van, stacking coolers and bags in the back. As Gabe handed him another bag without really looking at him, Dean and Cas exchanged a confused look.
Suddenly Charlie was at his side.
"Mornin' Red," Dean grinned.
Charlie eyed both men quickly. "Yeah. House rules: when sharing small spaces with lots of people, loud sex is a no-no."
Cas blushed and Dean laughed. "Is that what everyone is so uptight about?"
"You're loud," Charlie grinned, shaking her head.
"I was afraid of that," Cas muttered under his breath to Dean.
"Yeah? Well it didn't seem to me like you were too 'afraid of' making me scream."
"TMI!" Charlie waved her hands, grinning anyway. Meanwhile, Sam and Gabe gave him bitchfaces and Bobby just wouldn't look at them.
"You have got to be quieter," Cas whispered, unable to fight the grin on his lips any longer.
Dean laughed and kissed Cas before leaving the back end of the van for the driver's seat.
Dean knew how to eat up a highway. The first day was a brutal 15 hours with few stops.
They slept late at a motel the next morning and were back on the road by noon. With 5 hours left, Dean headed south to throw them off their location, going back to Tennessee.
They ate at a Chinese buffet until they were all ready to burst and walked the two blocks back to their motel. They gathered in Bobby's room, listening as Gabe made the call.
"Michael?"
"Gabriel! How dare you call here!"
"Now look, I know you're pissed, but I-"
"Pissed!" Michael hissed, "You have no idea the wrath you have unleashed upon yourself and every Hunter ever born!"
Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Always sooo harsh, brother."
"You have yet to see harsh-"
"Yeah, yeah," Gabe cut him off, "I called to set up a meet to give you back the real bonding cloth and the feather."
Silence droned for a moment as Michael seemed to absorb the words Gabe had said. "Fine. Bring them here. Now."
"No, not happening. I plan on never setting foot in Philadelphia again," Gabe said, a crooked grin on his mouth. "You come get them. We're in Oak Ridge, Tennessee. Meet us tomorrow morning at Biggerson's. Say, 8:00am."
"Gabriel, you insufferable swine, that's absurd."
"That's me," Gabe shrugged with a laugh, "the insufferable, absurd swine. Be there, Michael," Gabe's face sobered, "or I swear to God I will leave them laying on a table to end up in a dumpster. Or in the wrong hands."
Gabriel clicked the end button, took the microchip out of the burner phone and dropped it into a waiting thermos of acid. They had all their chips removed and put into the thermos the day before.
Bobby screwed the top on and pitched the dead phone in the trash can. "Nicely done, Gabriel."
"I have my moments," he smirked.
"It will take them that long to get here." Charlie grinned, looking at her watch. "Still, we should be on the look out for any Angels."
"Agreed," Dean said, getting to his feet. "We should be at Biggerson's by 6am just in case. I don't want any surprises."
"Sounds like a plan," Sam sighed.
Cas picked up the duffel bag and sat it on the table. He unzipped it, pulling out the glass box and the wooden box holding the feather. "We should repackage these to something smaller. And keep them separate, in case they try anything."
Dean flipped open the glass case, lifting the bonding cloth out. It made his skin tingle where it touched him. "This thing gives me the creeps. I don't like inanimate objects that can think for themselves."
Cas grinned. "It never thought much of me."
"Huh," Dean said, eyeing the red, thick, silky fabric with distrust. He shoved it in his coat pocket, feeling it there like a living thing.
Sam opened the wooden felt-lined box and pulled both feathers out, holding them up. "Does it matter which one we keep?"
Gabriel reached forward, taking them both gingerly. "Both were used in ceremonies. I can still feel angelic power in them both." He tipped them both out, looking at Cas.
Castiel eyed them both. "It does not matter which one."
Bobby reached forward, taking the slightly longer feather from Gabriel's hand. It was as long as Bobby's forearm. Sleek, black and pristine. "This one." He put it back in the felt-lined box and put the box back in the duffel. Dean put the glass case in the trash can and the bag was zipped closed.
Gabriel glanced around the room and pulled leftovers out of a brown paper bag, putting the feather inside and rolling it closed. "Good enough."
That evening, they stayed close to their rooms, watching TV and keeping a low profile. Charlie and Sam ran out to exchange the stolen van for something else in the next town over.
The next morning, the sun rose as Sam, Gabriel, Dean, and Cas entered Biggerson's for breakfast. Bobby and Charlie were two hours up the road, headed home, with their feather. They had decided late last night that splitting up was the smart play. It made Bobby nervous, but the other four had deemed the security of the feather was what was most important. After all, the feather would even the odds for demon hunting and Hunters could use the help in that department.
They took a table in the corner where they could see their car through the large windows. As they ate a hearty breakfast, the four watched every one that came and went. It was slightly tense, but knowing the other feather was gone, made all of them more at ease.
"Here they come," Gabriel nodded his chin toward the window as a sleek, black Lincoln rolled into the parking lot.
"Wonderful," Cas murmured, "he brought Uriel."
"Yeah," Dean smirked, "that guy's a load of laughs."
"You met him?" Castiel asked, looking at Dean with concern.
"Yeah. He was my drug pusher while I stayed with them. Zero people skills."
Gabriel waved jovially as the pair entered the restaurant looking somber as ever and had 'we're on a mission' practically tattooed across their furrowed foreheads.
"Assclowns," Gabriel muttered, his fake smile slipping.
They approached the four, who by this time had been sipping coffee and waiting for some time.
"Gabriel. Castiel." Micheal said sternly.
"Michael, Uriel," Dean mocked.
"Dean," Cas warned.
"That'd be me. And Sam. Since we're making awkward introductions."
Sam huffed a laugh, but Michael's face tightened and his eyes darted to Sam. "Sam Winchester."
"Yeah," Sam nodded.
Michael eyed him steadily. "The hit on Sam Winchester has been lifted. Since we have new...thoughts...on how to handle things."
"Would you sit down already?" Gabe huffed. "You stand out like a sore thumb as it is."
Michael glanced around, sitting down smoothly, while Uriel just sat down.
"Where are they?" Michael asked.
"The feather and the rag?" Dean asked, receiving matching looks of disgust from the Angels. "Right here with us. But first we talk rules."
"Rules," Michael said, leaning back.
"Yep," Gabe nodded, pulling out a map. It was a US map that took up the entire width and at least half the length of the table. Then he opened a second map, identical to it, laying it on top of the other one.
"What is this?" Uriel growled.
"This," Gabe grinned, "is a map. We are doling out demon jurisdictions right now."
"I figure," Sam began, ignoring the irritated glares from Michael and Uriel, "you guys are here," he marked Phili with a red marker, "on the east coast, so we should set up shop on the west coast." Sam marked San Fransisco in red. The Keepers had agreed before the meeting to keep Keeper's Cross a secret, in case the Angels turned on them. It pulled at the chain spells to agree on the lie, but the tug was nothing compared to what Cas had gone through when he lied to Dean. "So...how do we want to work this?"
Michael was looking at the map, his eyes traveling side to side. "I know you expect me to hate all of this, Gabriel, but the truth is, the Angels need help. I do not condone how you went about this coming to be, but the result is necessary."
"Well, the fact that you were going to kill me and Cas, dear brother," Gabriel said sagely, "motivated us to use unorthodox methods."
The pair eyed each other with disappointment.
"So, you do need help," Dean smirked. "So why waste time on chasing Sam and me all over the damn place when all we did was gank a demon."
Michael gave Dean a stern look. "You killed Azazel. The repercussions of a high level demon as he are dangerous."
"Huh," Sam gave Michael a confused look, "so we should have let him go. The demon who tried to poison me. The demon trying to open the gates of hell?"
Michael pursed his lips. "We decide which demons can be killed with a measure of diplomacy, as to not upset the order of things."
"The order?" Dean scoffed. "Look pal, the order is this, humans first, demons last."
"Simpletons," Uriel barked with a scornful glare.
Michael sighed, giving Uriel a less-than patient look.
"Once we start chasing demons," Dean said, leaning forward, "we're not waiting for any permission or rank checks. If we can gank them, they're dead."
Michael sighed, clasping his hands together. "Gabriel, Castiel, you understand the order of things better than your...new friends. I suggest you educate them as such."
Castiel looked at him thoughtfully. "I will. However, I agree that any demon should be captured or killed."
"I see," Michael said, looking at the map again. "Then I suppose we are back to deciding jurisdictions."
Everyone looked at the map. They agreed on the Mississippi River being a good divide. There were more Hunters than Angels apparently, and the line seemed a natural and easy border. Lines were drawn and Gabriel wrote in the blue expanse of the Atlantic Ocean that Angels would not kill Hunters and Hunters would not kill Angels. Everyone witnessing signed the map as a contract. The process was repeated on the second map, Michael taking one and Gabriel taking the other.
"I expect some of our other secrets not be shared," Michael said, eyeing Gabriel and Castiel sternly.
"You mean the fact that you like using demon blood to tattoo Angels?" Castiel said, a tiny smile ticking up the corners of his mouth.
Michael glared.
"Dude," Dean said, "that shit's gross. I don't care why you do it. It's fucking wrong."
"And no more red feathers. Ever," Sam said.
Michael flushed and Uriel looked away guiltily.
"No more red feathers," Michael growled. "Now give us what we came for."
Gabriel grinned triumphantly as he pulled the brown bag up from the floor and sat it unceremoniously in front of Michael.
Michael's eyes widened in horror as he quickly opened the bag. "You heathen! How dare you put an angel feather in a trash bag that smells like...Chinese food!"
Gabriel shrugged. "Guess a feather from the devil doesn't mean the same to us as it does to you."
Michael scoffed angrily. "You truly disgust me Gabriel."
"Yeah, well, you were gonna douse me with hot oil and shove me out a window to my death. Can't say I give two shits what your opinion of me is, Michael."
Michael glared angrily and held the bag delicately. "Where's the Bonding Cloth?"
Dean looked at Cas, who nodded. Dean pulled the length of red out of his pocket, feeling the familiar tingle at its touch. Again, Michael looked horrified at their blasé handling of such a treasure. Dean handed the wadded role to Cas. As Cas' hand closed around it, the cloth slithered to life, wrapping their wrists together in a tight bind. Cas and Dean jolted in surprise, the cloth holding their wrists together fast with a strong tingling sensation. Dean jolted again at a snapping shock that ran through his mind. Sam and Gabriel winced, both grabbing their heads, looking at the pair with shock.
"What the hell?!" Dean said, pulling and looking at Cas in shock.
"The cloth!" Castiel gasped. "It's binding us!"
"Impossible!" Uriel yelled, jumping up and grabbing the cloth, unable to remove it.
"The chain spell," Sam said, looking at the cloth in awe. "The chain spell is broken."
"Mine too," Gabriel hissed, rubbing at his temple.
Dean thought about it. Yes, his chain to Gabriel was broken. He looked at Cas.
Cas nodded. "The chain spell is indeed broken."
The cloth flared red and Dean and Cas looked at it with shock again. A warm feeling washed up Dean's arm and flooded his chest. "Cas?" He asked as soon as he could utter a word.
"Dean," Cas said excitedly, "we bonded! The Bonding Cloth has bonded us!"
"Shit!" Dean squeaked.
Cas bit his lip, giving Dean a nervous look.
Dean looked at the dulling cloth again. He turned his hand, lacing his fingers with Cas'. "Okay," he whispered reverently, looking at Cas again.
Cas grinned widely, leaning forward and kissing Dean. Dean kissed him back, laughing slightly as he allowed the feeling of joy pumping through him to just flow.
"Look!" Sam said, pointing as the cloth went slack and inanimate again.
"Impossible," Michael mumbled, looking at Castiel and Dean in repulsed confusion. "What have you done to it?"
"Nothing!" Gabriel glowered. "Deal with it Michael. You were wrong. God and angels, ya know, the REAL ones, know when true love is true love."
Michael shook his head no.
Castiel unclasped his hand and picked up the cloth in more wonder than he had ever given it before.
"You've done something to it," Michael hissed, snatching the cloth. "A spell, something!"
"You ass!" Gabe snapped, "You're so blind in the faith people have created that you dare reject what a real angel has done?"
Gabe snatched the cloth, wrapping it around Michael's wrist and his own. "See! Nothing!"
Michael jerked his arm away.
Dean grinned, taking Cas' hand in his again, kissing it. Never before had he felt more rewarded from the universe for something he wanted.
Gabe and Sam had caught the gesture, both grinning at their respective brother.
Dean's eyes moved over to Gabe. "Gabe," Dean said.
Gabe's honey brown eyes roved back to Dean still grinning.
Dean twirled his finger at the cloth and winked.
Gabe looked down at it with a question on his brow. He looked back at Dean, a smile growing on his face. His eyes snapped to Sam's. "Shall we?"
Michael made a lunge for the cloth, but Gabe jerked it away, the cloth flopping over onto Sam. The cloth sprung to life, coiling around Sam and Gabe's wrists. Both men's mouths dropped as the cloth glowed red. Their faces flushed and Sam looked at Gabe in wonder.
"Gabriel," Sam whispered.
"Holy shit," Gabe said in awe. He grasped Sam by the back of the head, pulling him in for a kiss.
Michael and Uriel were frozen with a mixture of confused anger on their faces.
The cloth dulled and fell loosely to the table.
"That's enough," Uriel snapped. He took the cloth and cradled it gingerly in his large, dark hands.
Michael continued to look at all of them curiously. His normally snub face was suddenly clouded.
"We should go," Uriel said deeply.
"Yes," Michael murmured.
"Yeah, you might catch the gay," Dean smirked.
Michael's brow furrowed in concern. He stood slowly, taking the paper bag gently into the crook of his arm. He picked up the contract and tucked it into his suit jacket pocket. "Gabriel, Castiel, I know you don't trust me. But I hope we can some day meet as equals."
Castiel stood as Michael and Gabriel stood. The three shared a small nod, Michael turning to leave.
"Let's get out of here," Gabe grinned
