Jyushimatsu
Jyushimatsu had known.
He knew that Karamatsu-niisan was hiding his sadness. Oh, he hadn't known that the second brother had been plotting his suicide, but he knew that the 'cool guy' routine was all fake.
The real Karamatsu was really, really different.
Whereas his facade was stupid and loud, Jyushimatsu knew that Karamatsu was smart. Real smart. People used to call him 'karappo-matsu'* because they thought he had an empty head when they were younger. But the truth was far from that. Karamatsu sometimes did nothing but think. And he had always been pretty quiet, at least until he started playing the guitar.
(*karappo means 'empty' and is what Karamatsu's name is a play on words for, even though Karamatsu is actually the Japanese word for the Larch tree)
Karamatsu received his guitar for his birthday in their last year of Middle School. He had taught himself how to play and would play it every free moment he had. Eventually, he started writing his own songs.
But just before High School that had abruptly stopped.
Jyushimatsu didn't know the details, but he had heard that Ichimatsu and Karamatsu had gotten in a fight with some street punks and Karamatsu had taken quite the beating.
Karamatsu's right hand had been broken, but even after it was all healed up, he still had not touched his guitar. It had just sat in the closet collecting dust.
During that time, when Karamatsu thought that no one was looking, he always looked so sad. Like he had broken something precious with no clue on how to put together the pieces.
"Karamatsu-niisan! Let's go sing!" Jyushimatsu tackle hugged his brother who had been moping.
"Eh?" Karamatsu looked up, startled. He had been lost in his own world.
"Let's go sing together! We haven't done that in a really, really long time!" Jyushimatsu said in a half pout. He really wanted Karamatsu to agree since music had always seemed to make him happier.
A pained look crossed the Blue Matsu's face quickly before it was replaced by a regretful smile. "I would love to sing one of our duets again but alas…"
There was a dramatic pause. "My injuries will not allow me to play as I once did."
What? Still? Jyushimatsu looked at Karamatsu's hand, it looked fine. They had taken off the cast months ago, and it seemed to be fully recovered.
"My hand… I never recovered full feeling. Although I can use it, I don't have as much control over it. I can't do much of the fancier fingerings, I'm limited to only a few cords that I can switch back and forth from." Karamatsu explained.
"I can't play anything more than a simple, boring song." He said, apologetically. Jyushimatsu could hear the pain in his brother's voice.
"That's okay! We can have a simple song! It can even be a cappella! We always have such funny lyrics, we can focus on those." Jyushimatsu was not to be deterred.
"I cannot sing long, my little Jyushimatsu. Perhaps only a song or two." Karamatsu warned. "Unfortunately, my vocal cords were also damaged. I can't put too much strain on them."
Jyushimatsu nodded vigorously, happy that Karamatsu was not just saying 'no' despite all the restrictions.
As the two went to go sing their special duet Jyushimatsu couldn't help but remember how much Karamatsu loved music.
His heart clenched as he remembered one very key fact.
Wasn't it Karamatsu's dream to become a rock star?
How was it for him to have lost his dream?
