A/N Okay guys I know we're seven chapters in and no fluff or lemons there coming in about 3 more chapters. We just have to get through this next action scene which starts after this one. Also I'm going back and naming my chapters. Thanks to all my wonderful readers and reviewers.

Disclaimer: Nothing has Changed SM still owns twilight. Dang. On with my obsession


Chapter 8 Scars: and Confessions.

" Jacob?"

" I know this is the place you were looking for" I nodded my head

" How did you find... we didn't start out the same way as before." I stammered

" Well actually Sam found it him and Emily use this place all the time."

" Yeah but we haven't been here in a while not since before ... um... the... umm... they left" Emily stuttered

" Don't be afraid to say there names yes its still hard for me but I feel it's the only way I'm going to completely move on. It wasn't the Cullen's who hurt me it was Edward." I said with surprising confidence.

"Edward use to take me here its beautiful when the wild flowers bloom. Its where he showed me what he was. I only wanted to find this place in hopes of closure."

" Well we can give you that closure in private." Jacob said he kissed the tip of my nose " come on Sam lets set the stuff down and then go hike to the waterfall."

" Ooo I've always wanted to go to the waterfall Sam." Emily's eyes had that sparkle in them again.

" Can I say no to a beautiful woman like you" Sam said before kissing Emily. I almost felt bad for intruding on their moment, but didn't have time to before Jacob and I were in a moment of our own.

" We'll be right back when your done let me know and I'll come get you so you can see the waterfall too." He kissed my forehead it was sweet, but I was tiring of sweet so grabbed the back of his head and pulled him to me so he could kiss my lips. His lips were so warm and soft. So pliable not what I was use to. I was use to hard and cold. This just seemed so right, kissing Jacob, it was natural. Neither one of us had to hold back.

My arms were around his neck and one hand in his hair. I pulled out the rubber band he had in his hair. It fell softly around us. His hands found there way around my waist pulling me closer to him. He was sweltering I wanted to take my coat off. I wonder if this heat coming from him is a wolf thing? One things for sure I wouldn't be needing all theses layers if we were to stay like this.

" Jake Lets go." Damn, I forgot about them. I began to blush as Jake broke the kiss with a loud smack.

" Take all the time you need." he kissed me quickly one more time before running off to catch up with Sam and Emily.

Once they were out of sight I began to walk around the Clearing. Where do I start? I guess I should just say how I feel out loud


" Edward I loved you I gave you all of my heart and you left me you took it with you. At least that's what I thought. But what you did was shatter it before leaving it behind. I thought I couldn't live without you. It hurt me to be alive every single day. I thought you were so beautiful so perfect. Of course you wouldn't want me." The tears were streaming down my face at this point

" Edward I have to let you go I cant have this pain anymore. You can no longer have my heart. It and my soul it belongs to Jacob now. He put me back together. I love him and even if I didn't owe him my life I would still choose him he is my everything." anger began to fill me.

" Edward you took my choice, and my family away from me. You always tried to decide for me, never letting me decide. I have my own mind. I might not always know what's best for me, but that is my mistake to make, not for you to take away. It angers me that no matter how hard I try you will always be apart of me. But that doesn't mean its in a good way. As of now you're a shadow hovering over me. Jacob. He's my sun and he will chase away all of my darkness. I just have to let him. And that's what I'm doing. This is the last time I will talk to you. I will no longer try to hear you. I will tell Jacob everything.

Edward I loved you I gave you my heart I trusted you with it But I'm taking it back now and I'm saying goodbye."

" Be happy Bella" it was as if my delusions were biding farewell. And I felt it was truly the last time I would here from Edward Cullen but there was a part a very small part that felt I was naive.


I felt one thousand times better. I wiped the tears from my face and took a deep breath. I chose life now its time to live it.

" Jacob I'm done." I yelled. He was there in an instant.

" You ok Bells?"

" Yeah I'm great now. I'm done dwelling on the past. I'm giving you all of me I trust you." Jacob picked me up and began twirling me around

" Oh Bella I've wanted this for so long I promise to never hurt you I will never ever leave you. You are my heart, my soul, body, and mind." He began placing kisses all over my face before landing on my lips. I felt every emotion he was going through not only through his kiss but in my soul. That must be the connection Sam was talking about. It felt great I felt love it completely filled me devotion and protection completely covered me. When he broke the kiss we were out of breath and dazed.

" Do you want to go see the waterfall now" he said placing me on my feet. " Its really beautiful."

" Yeah sure." The walk wasn't long but it ended all too soon for me I wanted as much alone time with Jacob as possible. " How come Sam let you come get me by yourself."

" He's starting to trust I have things in control. Plus he's in hearing distance of me so he could get to us quick enough if something were to go wrong."

" I don't want to think something's going to go wrong Jacob but there is nothing wrong with taking precautions kid" Sam said as we stepped out of the forest to see the Water fall we were standing on the edge of a cliff.

It was beautiful everything was green surrounding the waterfall it was a sight to behold and the sounds were relaxing an peaceful I could stay here with Jacob forever.

Unfortunately our stomachs didn't agree with us. It was like a cannon with my stomach in the lead followed by Jacob's then Sam's then Emily's. We all laughed as we began to walk back to the clearing.

Once we got back to the Clearing the guys spread out the Blankets for us and set up the food. It seemed we were having a mountain of turkey sandwiches chips and warm soda.

We ate in silence except for the CD I was playing. I didn't know where it came from but it was great and very fitting for the moment. All this perfectly timed mood music was starting to make me suspicious. I didn't want to ruin the mood though so I just let the music play I would have to check into it later.

After we were done Jacob patted his stomach before laying his head in my lap. I began to stroke his face with out thought. He grabbed my hand and kissed every finger then my palm up to my wrist. He stopped and looked at it studying it hard, he looked up at me.

"You know your beautiful right." He said, but I could see the questions in his eyes. He dropped my hand, and began kissing the fingers, and palm of my right hand. He made his way all the way up my forearm. His lips lingered on the scar I got when Edward flung me across the room in an attempt to save my life from a blood thirsty Jasper.

By now I had shed my Jacket and long sleeve shirt leaving me in my short sleeved under shirt it was an unseasonably warm February day, and combined with the heat that now radiated form Jacob I had actually begun to sweat.

Jacob began kissing up my arm again. He made his way to my shoulder to my collar bone. He placed butterfly kisses on my chin and jaw bone and made his way up to my most recent scar from the motor cycle accident. It was barely visible to human eyes but Jacob was a werewolf so he could see it clearly.

His lips parted from my skin and I shuddered from the loss of contact. He sighed un able to keep his questions at bay any longer. " Bells honey… how did you get all of these." He said caressing the one on my left wrist. I usually wore a thick bracelet to cover the silver crescent that was very apparent on my arm, but I forgot it today in my haste to see Jacob.

" Well" I began. Jake looked me in my eyes patiently. I was lost in them there was no way I could make up something plausible with him staring at me like that, and I didn't want to so I opted for the truth.

" I'll tell you if you promise not to freak out on me" he simply nodded his head.

" Well you know how I got the one on my head." he began to chuckle

" Yeah your bike ran your head into a rock" he smirked

" How'd you get this one he said kissing the crescent with a sweet tenderness. Its cold."

" We'll get to that one." I realized I would have to tell Jacob the whole story about James, Victoria and Laurent and about what happened on my birthday

" You really want to talk about my scars." I stalled

" Bella I want to know everything possible about you" he said intently "and like I said I promise not to freak out." I rolled up my sweat pants to expose the scar that was on my right leg it was faint and I knew it would be gone soon it's a good thing I healed well or I would look like the Bride of Frankenstein.

" Do you remember last year when I ran off to phoenix?" He looked pained. The story had been that I ran off because I was afraid of being in love with Edward.

I took a deep breath letting it out with a huff. " The truth is I really went down there because I was being hunted by a sadistic vampire named James.

I told the story of how James and his coven interrupted The Cullen's and I baseball game.

" Wait a minute. You Isabella Swan played baseball. I don't think I heard you correctly."

" No I didn't play I watched and umpired."

" Holy shit vampires play baseball?"

" Well Jake it is America's Favorite pass time, and its only during thunderstorms."

" Why do they need thunderstorms.?"

" Because when the hit the ball or run into each other its really loud like a boom of thunder. Jake if you keep interrupting I'm never going to finish."

" Shutting up" He smirked and I rolled my eyes at him.

" As I was saying James' coven interrupted our baseball game, but upon Edward and I leaving he caught the scent of my blood and wanted me. The Cullen's, mainly Edward protected me making the hunt a challenge. Attempts to through him off my trail were futile and in the end he had Victoria the female in the coven research my past and it lead him strait to phoenix which is where Jasper, Alice, and I were hiding out." I shuddered at the thought of what was to come next.

" He tricked me into believing he had Renee." Jakes face saddened more but there was also a look of understanding.

" I escaped my fortune teller and emotion reading body guards"

" Wait the vampires can see the future and read emotions."

" Not all of them. Alice can see the future and Jasper can read and manipulate emotions, and Edward can read minds."

" What the hell that's not fair how come they get all the cool shit" I laughed at Jacob

" Jacob do you want to hear the story or not."

" Sorry, sorry continue please."

" I went to him to save her only she wasn't there she was never in danger and had never left Jacksonville. He had used old videos of me with her calling my name in desperation to lure me." I laughed at the next part to come.

" It's amazing that I find this funny now, but he actually gave a monologue like a true villain. After I refused to scream for him he smashed my head into a mirror." I said as I absent mindedly rubbed the spot where my skull and glass collided so long ago.

" When I tried to run, not that that would have been successful under any circumstance with my lack of grace, he broke my leg." I pointed to the marks left from the pins that were used to fix my leg.

" Edward came in and began to fight with James. At one point he tried to pick me up and get me out but James attacked him throwing him into a window. When the window shattered a piece of glass stabbed my thigh and cut my femoral artery. James could no longer resist my blood, so he got away from Edward and he bit me."

Jacob was stunned as I knew he would be I ducked my head in embarrassment and blushed.

" HE WHAT!" yelled Sam and Jacob in unison.

Embry told me that werewolves had hearing just as good as vampires so I knew that Sam heard the whole story.

But that false since of privacy that he allowed us by being on a separate blanket and talking with Emily was now gone.

" How the hell is that possible." Sam asked. He and Jacob had the same expression of shock furry and confusion.

" Can you let me finish my story" I asked irritated. They nodded as I inhaled sharply.

" James bit me but Edward was able to get him off of me he held James until the rest of the Cullen's showed up with the exception of Rosalie and Esme who stayed behind to protect Charlie. While Jasper, Emmett, and Alice ripped James apart and burned the pieces Carlisle had Edward suck the venom out of me while he stopped the bleeding from my thigh and head."

" Bella that must have been very painful" Emily said now joining story time with Bella.

" I didn't feel any of my other injuries because of the bite the pain was insurmountable. It felt as if I was being burned alive."

" I'm sorry to interrupt you again Bella but I thought once a vampire begins…" He paused trying to find the correct word and settled on " feeding they cant stop."

" He almost didn't he found it the will in him to stop and saved my life"

" Seems to me you wouldn't have been in that situation if it weren't for him." Sam scoffed.

Ignored him and turned my attention back to Jacob who was awaiting me patiently.

" Continue" he said

" It was a miracle and luck that that actually worked. There are only a few seconds to a few minutes before the venom reaches your heart or travels threw you blood system. Obviously it was caught in time but not without leaving a mark this scare is like them its hard and cold like them. That's it for those scars." Emily pulled Sam's face to her as he was about to ask a question .

" Give them their privacy" she cooed. Sam quickly lost interest in my tales and it was back to just me and Jake. I turned to see him eying the scar on my upper arm.

" Did you get that one from that day too?"

" No I got it six months ago on my last birthday."

" I explained to him how in one of my signature Bella moments I got a paper cut and dismantled the Cullen family as well as cut my arm.

" Bells I don't understand." He looked frustrated and it was also apparent in his voice when he spoke.

" What don't you understand ?"

" I'm sorry Bells but I just cant understand why or how could you love him."

" I…you… you don't choose who or what you love Jacob I would take that you know that one from experience." I was upset I expected Jake to understand that. Even if he was enemies with my ex.

" That's not what I meant Bella."

" Well then what do you mean"

" Bella look at you. Your beautiful beyond words even with your scars, but Bella look at you look at your body."

" what about my body, Jake your confusing me."

" Every recent scar on your body is because of him except this one" he said frowning at the small scar from the motorcycle incident.

" Every physical scar is him every emotional scar is because of him."

" You for got mentally too" I sulked he either ignored my comment or didn't catch it I was hoping for didn't catch it.

" Bell whether or not it was his intention, he continuously put you in danger or hurt you in some way.

Its because of who he is and what he is or what his actions are.

James hunted you because of his actions, what and who he is.

James bit you because of him.

He broke your leg because of him.

Cut you leg because of him. The cut on your arm is because of him.

And now your beautiful heart has suffered because of him."

Jacobs features were angry, but soft at the same time

" You mentioned mentally care to explain that one to me" he asked in a low voice.

I began to explain to him what I was talking bout at the same time letting him know how truly crazed I was.

"When I'm in danger or doing something reckless and stupid I hear him telling me not to."

I told him about the night in Port Angeles with Jessica.

" That's how I came up with the idea for the bikes. Jake I'm so sorry I used you to hear his voice it will never happen again Its your voice I want to hear now not his."

Jake then did something I totally did not expect. He began to laugh.

" What's so funny"

" Aw Bells you may have used me to hear him but that's what inadvertently brought us together."

" Huh, At least that's on thing good that happened because of him in a twisted way."

Jacobs face became serious before asking "Does it still talk to you."

" It stopped around the time I kissed you at the movie theaters." I hung my head. " But when I was getting my closure it spoke to me one last time."

" What did it say"

" Be Happy"

" and are you"

" Yes very and getting happier everyday."

He put his forehead to mine and stared into my eyes searching I guess to see if what I said was the truth. He closed his eyes and let out a breath that he had been holding.

" Jake?" he opened his eyes staring into my soul every emotion of love devotion and concern was evident in them. " are you happy" He placed his hands on each side of my face and pulled my bottom lip into his. As he kissed me I could feel his happiness, eagerness, love and devotion.

One could not deny these feelings rolling off of him. I began to kiss him back hungrily I moaned as his tongue licked my bottom lip asking for entrance which I instantly granted. He pulled me closer to him straddling him. This was quickly becoming my favorite position when kissing him.

I was lost in him, in his essence, in his warmth, in his joy. One of his hands left my cheek and laced in my hair, as he began to push me back towards the blanket as I tried to take off his shirt. Jakes chest began to rumble in what sounded like a low growl.

" Umm Jake, Bella?"


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