A/N: Finally, we get to the action. The plot really starts to take shape, and the story branches off into other genres than just humor.
"What is the purpose of this? There is more here than just a festival. Did you think no one would notice, silly girl? You never thought I would see you, nay, you thought it impossible. Trapped away by my actions, hiding from the world."
He leaned over me, fire dancing dangerously in his eyes. I backed up against the wall, breath quickening and mind racing for a way to get out of this situation.
"I see you now, child. You should have known better than to play with fate."
"Come, mother, they're arriving!"
"I know, I know, I'm on my way!"
I rushed down the steps, my entourage following closely behind. We hurried across the courtyard towards the gate, where a huge crowd had gathered. Guards stood to either side of the gates, forming a pathway through the crowd. The square was decorated with bright reds and oranges, the colors of our crest.
Red and orange twisted in his eyes, forming an eerie dance of color and danger. I knew that I would have to answer him, but the words stuck in my throat. He noticed my fear, and chuckled darkly.
"Yes, now you see the threat I pose towards you, and your pathetic daughters. You were too filled with pride and self-assurance, thinking that you could keep me away. How could you, when your castle is filled with all that entices me?"
We heard them before we saw them.
The sound of horses and boots, accompanied by horns and heralds. Their banners were raised high, one for every kingdom, one for every leader. Slowly, they all came into sight. Hundreds of beings, traveling across the fields, coming closer with every second. My heartbeat sounded in my ears, and my breath caught in my throat. I would have to be a queen today, I would have to convince hundreds of people that I wasn't a fake, and that I was trustworthy. I had to lie through my teeth to some of the wisest people existing, people who had lived for thousands of years.
I stood up straighter and held my hair high. I did look the part of a queen, dressed in dark blue, pearls circling my neck. The dress was embroidered in silver, figures that seemed to run away before you could make them out. My dark hair was pulled up behind my head by an elegant net of pearls and fastened by silver pins. My feet were covered by my dress, the train of which lightly scraped the ground. Underneath my elegant dress, I wore sturdy boots, with a knife slipped into the right heel.
My silence aggravated him, the formerly frightening pose becoming threatening as he slowly lost his patience.
"Have you nothing to say, little queen? I have found you out, and now I will take what is yours."
I breathed deeply, my hand slowly inching down my leg.
"I accept defeat."
He blinked in surprise before grinning maliciously.
"So you are not as prideful as I thought. Perhaps you are in awe of me."
My hand grasped the knife in my boot as I nodded and stared into his eyes.
"I would never presume to be anything less than a worm compared to you."
He drew back a bit, seeming pleased.
"You know your place. You humans are predictable, always humbling yourself in front of the more powerful. You have always been the same, and will always be the same. Nothing you do can surprise-"
I lunged forward, and kissed him. He stumbled back in surprise, but before he could react I plunged the knife into his neck and jumped away. I started to run as fast as I could. I could hear his cries of rage behind me, and feel the flames licking my heels.
"You can run, little one, but you cannot escape."
The first that I greeted were the elves, their ethereal beauty shining like a beacon. I greeted Lord Elrond with a smile, wishing him and his entourage a pleasant stay. Mirkwood was next, with the Elvenking standing at least half a foot taller than me. We greeted each other formally, him regarding me with well-hid suspicion. Lastly came Lothlorien. Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn, the former of which could read minds.
My façade broke for a moment as my heart plunged into my stomach. If Galadriel decided to take a peek in my head, there would be no stopping her from finding out about everything . My inner turmoil was nowhere to be seen as I greeted her, although I knew that she probably sensed it. She gave me a knowing look, and my heart stopped. She fixed me with her piercing stare, and I held my breath. Seconds seemed like hours, but she finally moved on. I slowly let out a breath, composing myself enough to greet the next lord or lady.
When I looked back up, I was met with another set of piercing eyes. Icy blue eyes regarded me suspiciously, and I was struck with how much Thorin Oakenshield and Thranduil had in common.
He approached me slowly, eyes raking over me as he analyzed my every feature. I welcomed him with a smile.
"Welcome, Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the Mountain. I trust your journey has not been too unpleasant?"
He seemed slightly shocked by my happy disposition, but his features quickly melted into stern once more.
"As pleasant as it can be to travel this distance."
His answer caught me slightly off guard, but I continued to smile at him.
"Well, then one should be thankful for that. Annalena will escort you to your room," Here I gestured to the woman next to me. "and your company will also be accommodated.
He studied me briefly once more before nodding and turning to Annalena. As she led him away, I was struck with how little he had said. Surely he knew that he had just snubbed me, right? He was raised as royalty, did he do that on purpose?
I decided to think about Thorin Oakenshield later, and focus on greeting the rest of the royals now.
I raced through the corridors, the fire right behind me. My skirts were bunched up in my hands, enough of my legs showing to give an elf a heart attack. I could feel, hear and almost see him behind me. I knew that he would leave me alone as soon as I reached another person, he wouldn't dare try anything.
He must have known what my plan was, because he quickly covered the door in front of me in a wall of fire. I veered off to the left, blood pounding in my head. I shouldn't be there, it was the wing for the elves. I hoped that I wouldn't run into anyone too important, otherwise it could turn out very awkward later on.
I heard footsteps on the wooden floor, and thanked God. I quickly turned the corner, and almost ran smack-dab into the approaching elf. He started, and stared at me. I opened my mouth to explain, but I was cut off by my pursuer appearing around the corner. His black curls were a mess, but other than that he looked perfectly composed. He nodded to us, and walked past. I had won this round, but he wasn't going to give up quickly.
We gave our visitors time to settle down and explore before any of the major activities. The first competition would start the day after next , but until then, there was time to relax.
Well, time for everyone except me.
I was busy trying to pry my overenthusiastic daughters off of handsome young heroes.
Now, it's not like they were chasing them around with sticks, or ambushing them in corners, but I knew flirting when I saw it. An occasional glance, a shy smile, fluttering of lashes, you name it. I wasn't blind. I didn't know why they kept on blatantly flirting right in front of me. I'm single, not an idiot.
Almost every five minutes I had to pull a different girl aside, and remind her about the ground rules:
1. No flirting with main characters.
2. No falling in love with main characters.
3. No sleeping with main characters
The last one had to be added on after a particularly awkward situation between two sues had come up. Both of them fighting over one character, saying that sleeping with them technically didn't count as loving or flirting.
My years as a teacher had not prepared me enough for this at all.
Some part of me felt slightly bad about 'ruining' their chances for love, but the rational part of me didn't care at all. Of course, I did care about their feeling, so I was never particularly harsh, but it wasn't like they could convince me with tears. I sure hoped I was doing the right thing.
I ran into many interesting characters while I was playing mother hen, for example Kili, Thorin's nephew. He showed absolutely no amount of regret when I pulled my daughter away from him, and winked at her while we walked away. The boy himself was quite cute, but his flirting made me want to tear my hair out. I had to listen to a 'love-struck' dwarrow recite flowery poetry about his blue eyes. Brown. Green? Ok, maybe I wasn't paying too much attention. Don't most dwarves dislike poetry?
Speaking of poetry, one of the craftier girls had snuck a Lothlorien elf a love potion, who then proceeded to serenade her in the oddest of places. Thankfully, no one but her (and me) saw him, and I was able to get him out of the bramble bush, and give him the antidote. The poor sod had no memory of what happened, and woke up covered in brambles. I really hoped that he hadn't told anyone else about his odd experience, or we would start to gain a bad reputation.
Through all of these odd recoveries and expeditions though, I did have a chance to speak with Sia about her elleth friend.
Ah yes, the elleth that she had been writing to non-stop since coming home from Rivendell. I hadn't really said anything to her about it, but anytime I saw her with pen and paper, I grinned a little. Ever since our guests had arrived, she had been strangely absent, and it wasn't hard to figure out why. However, I got a close-up of how far their relationship had progressed when I found them making out under a tree.
I stumbled upon them while looking for Jaazah, and my jaw dropped.
"Oh! Uh, God! I'm sorry, you're…kissing. Like, eating her face off. Ok, then, uh, you kids have fun!"
After making a complete fool of myself, I promptly turned around and walked away. Afterwards though, I did talk about what had happened with Sia:
"So, uh, you kissed."
"Yes."
"Well, don't be too enthusiastic! I'm your mom, you can tell me stuff!"
At this point in the conversation, Sia probably thought I wanted a very detailed description, and slowly started to turn red. I watched with amusement as she spluttered.
"No, I mean yes, you're my mother, but, uh…"
Eventually I took pity on her, and silenced her with a hug.
"Don't worry, kiddo."
At first she stiffened, but after a few seconds she melted into my arms. I was struck by the sudden realization that some of these girls had never been hugged, and a bolt of fury rushed through me. At that moment I hated Suethors even more than usual.
All of this had happened in the short time before the first competition. That night I would be dining with all the nobles. Jaazah had helped me with the seating charts, so I wasn't worried about slighting anyone by putting them at the wrong table or something. No, I had much bigger things to be worried about. For example, I still hadn't come up with a good way to explain how I had over two-hundred daughters, all of them as different as can be, some with ears and tails, some of different races, and all of this without a spouse. Yeah, that might bring up some interesting questions.
No matter how nerve-wracking that was, I had another problem on my hands. Remember how the seamstress said she'd make every rich noble fall in love with me? (Or something like that) Well, she wasn't kidding. Apparently, word spread, and now there were about fifty girls dedicated to getting me a husband, and fifty that thought this was absolutely hilarious. I wasn't as concerned about their matchmaking efforts as I was about the possibility that they might seriously offend one of the nobles. I really hoped that they didn't' t accidentally start a war or something.
So now I had flirting Sues, matchmaking Sues and a bunch of nobles to lie through my teeth to. I almost felt that it was pointless. I should just go to sleep and watch Middle Earth burn.
I was brought out of my destructive dreams by a pin stabbing me in the head. I flinched slightly, before sighing and concentrating on sitting still. I was getting ready for dinner, at least, that's what I had been doing for the past two hours. I was not used to being this pampered. And by 'pampered', I mean that currently I was in a velvet seat, wearing a silk bathrobe and having my hair done. In front of me were at least ten dresses, each and every being thoroughly explained to me by Jaazah.
"We sent a good message this morning with the blue, it tells them that you're wise and truthful. But now we want to show that you have a backbone. Something a bit tighter, red or orange, to fit with the crest."
"A bit tighter? Wasn't the one I wore this morning tight enough?"
She continued with pulling dresses in and out of my wardrobe as she answered.
"We need to show that you're powerful, confident and not afraid to stand out. Besides, it never hurts to look a bit sexy."
She smirked a bit at the last part, before turning away immediately. I blinked in surprise. Jaazah wasn't one of the matchmakers, was she?
One hour, twenty dresses and six boxes of jewelry later, I was ready.
As I looked in the mirror, one thought came to mind.
"Holy shit, I look great."
Let me tell you this, when you're dressed in a sexy dress, and have bright red lipstick on, you feel pretty damn confident.
Too bad my boots didn't fit under the dress.
I put away all thoughts of my boots, and prepared myself for what was about to come.
We made our way to the dining hall, me feeling more confident with every step. I was a queen, dammit! I could do this.
Trumpets sounded, and the doors were flung open. I strode inside, a bright smile on my face.
"Kings and Queens, Lords and Ladies, it is my utmost pleasure to dine with you tonight, the night that marks the beginning of this wonderful celebration, and the beginning of what I hope will be a prosperous and joyful friendship."
Jaazah was right, there's never anything wrong with being a little sexy.
