Keeper's Conundrum – Chapter Eight
"Dammit!" Rydia clutched both hands to her head and slumped to her knees next to the path. "Why can't I do this?! Even when I actually was a child, I could cast many spells before having to rest and study."
Kain strode across the grassy field, leaned over and offered a hand.
"What do you want?" Rydia asked crossly.
"I want to help you up from the ground, then I want to speak with you."
"About what?"
"About what is happening and how it is frustrating you."
"What do you care?" Rydia turned her head away from the dragoon and looked at the nearest spire on the Royal Archive in the distance. She had decided to find a secluded place in the park next to the Royal Archive to practice her magic and cursed to herself that she evidently hadn't put enough distance between herself and the others.
Kain reflected that of all the people he'd traveled with during the pivotal time on his world, he had never been able to forge a friendship with Rydia. Amity, for the sake of their mutual friends, but actual friendship, no. It made sense, upon reflection. His first meeting with Rydia had been catastrophic for the girl. He had contributed to her mother's death directly, by slaying the Mist Dragon who was paired to the summoner. As if that weren't enough of a blow, the Carnelian Signet Cecil had been charged with bringing to Mist had released its magical bombs and destroyed her village. Kain recalled that he tested Cecil's blind obedience to fulfilling his duty to their king by suggesting that they should kill the girl – while in front of Rydia. Then, in a completely misguided attempt to comfort the grieving child by assuming responsibility for her safety, he and Cecil had chased her. Rydia might not have been scared of dragons, as her mother routinely summoned one, but having an armored man clad in dragon mail, and a bona fide dark knight chase her directly after the damage they'd just wreaked in her life would surely be the stuff of nightmares.
As if that first meeting hadn't been traumatic enough, when Rydia and Kain next encountered each other, he was firmly in Golbez's camp. To this day he wasn't sure how much of his behavior was due to manipulative mind control and how much was due to his desire to follow his own dark impulses. Be that as it may, Cecil had proven that he was, despite his fearsome appearance, gentle and kind, and concerned for Rydia's welfare, while Kain had been a consummate bastard.
"I care," he responded simply.
Rydia regarded the dragoon. "Look, I know that what happened with my mom and Mist wasn't your fault, and you have to be a decent person or Cecil wouldn't be friends with you..."
Kain interrupted her so smoothly, Rydia couldn't even bristle at him. "It's frustrating, isn't it, to find yourself so limited here with what is so easy back in our world? And you have the additional burden of appearing as a child when you are not in mind and heart a young girl. Cecil seems to be taking his unusual situation in stride as well. I am relieved that I am not subject to any difficulties such as you and Cecil are dealing with – aside from my limited access to my abilities."
Rydia blinked up at him. Even when she was her normal, full-grown self, she still had to look up to see Kain's face, as the dragoon was so much taller than she was. He didn't speak much, at least as far as she recalled, and even then any comments that weren't directly about the business of battling or exploring had been dryly sarcastic. She never understood why someone as deep-down nice as Cecil claimed dour Kain as his friend. That Cecil still regarded Kain as his friend, after the dragoon had snubbed him by refusing to attend his wedding and coronation, was beyond her.
"I know you have no reason to like me, trust me even, but I can't stand by and watch you get so frustrated, perhaps to the point of hurting yourself, over this. Rydia, even when you were a child, you had nothing to prove to me. Your skills, and what you have done with them, are most impressive."
Rydia balled her hands into fists and shrieked up at him. "Stop patronizing me! You're not the one who's a child! You're not the one everyone is looking down on! I can't – I won't let anyone down because I'm reduced to this again. I will figure out how to use my magic as I should, or die trying!"
Kain seemed taken aback by her sudden tirade. For all that Rydia retained her adult mind and memories, that mind was currently forced to express itself through a child-like form and the normal frustrations of childhood often drove even the most amenable child in to tantrums and tirades.
She's not a child, even though she looks like one. Treating her according to the outburst and her appearance will only deepen the rift between us. Best for me to ignore it, and address the Rydia behind the manifestation, the one who knows she's an adult and is craving the acknowledgment and respect that deserves, Kain said to himself. He crossed his arms, and lowered his chin fractionally, using his stylized helmet as a way to force Rydia to meet the dragon's gaze. To anyone else, particularly one who was a child, the action would be threatening, but Kain knew Rydia knew that he knew such an action was comforting to her, an acknowledgment that she had grown up with the presence of an actual dragon in her life, and that now she could summon them to help her at will.
Sure enough an instinctive smile crept across her lips. "Damn you," she said incongruously. "How did you figure that out about me?"
"I, too, counted a dragon among my friends in my childhood," Kain admitted. "To one who cares for dragons, there is nothing daunting in a dragon's direct gaze."
Rydia considered that. Oh, she knew about Richard Highwind's wyvern, but it was assumed that the dragon had died after its master had perished. Perhaps she did have a few – very minor – things in common with the gloomy dragoon after all. She sighed in resignation. "Okay, yeah, it's frustrating me. I can sense the magic is there, I just – can't – quite – reach it. I don't understand why I have to meditate on my spells now by gazing into an orb instead of just the mental recall that I've used – since I actually was a child. It's very – weird."
Kain inclined his head in a gesture that Rydia took to mean he wanted her to follow him, and walked along the path that meandered alongside the woods next to the complex of buildings. He walked toward a bench that was placed across the path from a small garden. He removed his helmet, placed it on the bench, and sat next to it, wrapping his arms around the knee he drew up toward his chest.
Rydia lifted an eyebrow and launched a sly grin at him. "I've never seen you act this casual – ever!" she declared.
"Sadly, I wasn't in my right mind most of the time I was in your company," Kain replied evenly. "But that is a discussion for another time, if you wish. For now, I would like to help allay your frustration."
"How?"
"We could spar. That way you can see if you can change spells on the fly, without it being during the pressure of actual combat and without meditating on an ability orb. Perhaps that concern has been blocking you," Kain suggested.
"Spar? With you? Yeah, not so much. I might be able to cast White Magic again, but not as well as a dedicated mage; my rod would barely dent that armor; my whip would be even less useful; and while I might have a chance to start a spell that you could perhaps even feel, there's little to no chance I'd complete it before you pounced on me like a giant armored cat!" Rydia retorted.
Kain sighed and shook his head. "Armored cat? I guess that's better than what our favorite paladin said earlier. Cecil accused me of being a grasshopper. Truly, the lofty calling of dragoon does not receive the renown it is due..."
Rydia giggled at Kain's wryly exaggerated melancholy.
"But you do bring up several valid points. Cecil and I can spar because our skills and armor are on the same level. You magely types with your symbol-covered robes and ornately carved and gilded sticks are quite a bit more – squishy."
"Squishy!?" Rydia exclaimed. "You wanna fry in that tin carapace you call armor, turtle-man?!"
"Turtle-...?" Kain shook his head. "What sort of menagerie do all of you believe me to be? Every animal under the sun aside from the one my armor is designed to represent!" Kain looked up as movement caught his attention. "Hoy, there!"
White Mage was walking up the path toward them and looked up at Kain's call. "Yes? Did you need something?"
"Yes, yes we do. Rydia and I would like to train. Could we ask you to watch as we spar and cure as needed?"
Rydia looked around. "We should probably find a better spot. We don't want to ruin the flowers."
"There's a clearing back the way I came. Would that do?" White Mage asked.
"Admirably," Kain replied.
In some ways the spear, that was Kain's weapon of choice, was far superior to a sword. It had excellent reach and when wielded properly could focus all of a warrior's strength into the sharp tip, which could be used to pierce even the strongest mail. In a dragoon's hands, a spear was even more versatile, able to be used for slashing as well as stabbing and dizzyingly swift attacks that came from unexpected angles, and thus were hard to defend against.
The sword had its advantages though – such as now. A sword could be used in sparring matches because a warrior could elect to use the flat instead of the edge without distorting the method of attack as much as a spear-wielder would. A sword could also be rendered less harmful by using the sheath, or wrapping the blade edge to decrease its lethality.
Kain elected not to try to wrap the tip of his spear because even the tiniest extra drag of air along the edge would tamper with his fine control. It could be more dangerous to try to render his weapon less likely to injure than to rely on his skill to pull or re-target an attack.
As they sparred, with the White Mage standing on the sidelines and casting curing spells every so often, Kain admitted that while Rydia might be as 'squishy' as other mages, she was a smart opponent. The third time he set his weight in preparation to Jump and attack her from above – and she messed up that attack with a precisely timed Quake spell – he knew it wasn't just luck. She was using every nuance of battle to her advantage.
She'd run him down with her Chocobo several times. She'd Quaked him nearly off his feet several times in addition to the three that ruined his Jump attempts. "Come at me with normal attacks – nothing fancy and no Jumps. I want to try something," Rydia asked.
Kain complied. He wasn't sure what she was trying to do. Terrific strain showed on her face as she weakly dodged his attacks, or tried to block or deflect them with her rod. After several moments where Rydia's expression reflected actual pain, a baby fireball appeared and fizzled out just before it reached him.
Rydia collapsed. Kain Jumped then, but not to attack, as he dropped his spear before leaping. He used his Jump to get to her side, catch her, and keep her from crashing into the ground.
"You nearly had it. I saw your Fire spell," Kain said.
"Nearly isn't good enough," Rydia retorted bitterly.
"It is far better than what any of us have managed to do. The two skill limit seems inviolable."
"Woo!" Rydia exclaimed, right before she passed out in Kain's arms.
