It was the middle of summer, the sun was hot, school was out, and all across the country people were doing a dance called the Funky Grandpa.
It was also the day of the FBI's annual summer obstacle course run. Each agent would be trotted out to the training grounds to take their turn running the course, designed to test their speed, strength, endurance, and on the fly reasoning. It showed just who was top dog...and just who had let themselves go with the donuts in the breakroom.
And as Seeley Booth made his way to the starting line, everyone knew where all of those donuts had gone.
"This is going to end badly," Hodgins muttered. Temperance had convinced her team to come and cheer Booth on, pulling some strings to get them in. But as Hodgins, Sweets, Cam, and Angela stared at Booth, with his ,jiggling belly, long gray hair and beard and round chubby face, they were wishing they could just point to the old guy with the heart condition and claim they were there for him.
Temperance grinned as Booth stretched. "He is rather attractive, don't you think? The way his body is structured gives him a royal bearing."
"Like Jabba the Hutt," Hodgins muttered. Angela elbowed him in the ribs. Temperance wasn't paying attention, however, as she busy watching her partner (and husband, lest she forget!) finish his stretches.
"Be nice," Angela muttered, glancing at Temperance. Booth wasn't the only one who had changed since the wedding. While not as big, Temperance had gained some weight as well. At first, Angela had been jealous; Temperance's hips had flared out and breasts gained at least two cup sizes, making her very 'stacked'. But as the months had gone by and the squints had found Temperance spending more time in the kitchen than on the platform, the anthropologist's body had gone curvy to...well, not fat, but more on the light side of chubby. Angela's father would have called her a full figured gal, and then commented that she looked like all women should.
"Meat is for men, bones are for dogs, darlin'," He had once intoned.
Then there was the hair. Temperance's once long dark locks appeared to be frost covered and had been hacked short into what would have been a nice bob cut on a younger looking woman. Instead, it made Temperance look older...like a grandmother.
"Sweets, you are much to thin!" Temperance complained. "I can clearly see your 3rd and 4th ribs." She pulled out a baggy full of sugar cookies and gave him some. "I also brought some milk, if you'd like?"
Sweets merely waved his hands. "No, no...I'm good." Temperance turned away, allowing Sweets a moment to pull the others aside. "I see what you mean."
Hodgins nodded. "Seriously, we aren't the only ones seeing it?"
"Oh no, you are not." Since their marriage, Booth and Temperance had found ways to avoid their shrink, claiming they needed time to adjust to being 'a couple'. Sweets had fought it half-heartedly, but now, more than ever, he wished he had pushed the issue. "What does she say, when you press her about her...body changes?"
Angela frowned. "When I bring up the weight, she gives me some speech about the heaviness of a person signifying in ancient times their status and wealth. Then she shoves a candy cane in my mouth." Angela frowned, patting her stomach. "Which might explain why Brennan isn't the only one gaining weight." Cam and Hodgins looked away, both not wanting to admit that Temperance's baking skills had resulted in much needed diets.
Hell, against Temperance's cookies and candies, half of the scientists working at the Jeffersonian were now apply for The Biggest Loser.
"Are there any other changes in the two that you have noticed?" Sweets asked.
"Well..."
~MC~MC~MC~MC~
(last week)
Booth frowned. They were here to investigate a murder, trying to talk to a wealthy business man, and his 5 year old daughter just kept staring at him.
"Sweetie, can I do something for you?" Booth finally asked.
The little girl grinned, wiggling up onto his lap. "I'd like a dolly and a new party dress and a-"
~MC~MC~MC~MC~
Hodgins frowned. "And don't forget two days ago..."
~MC~MC~MC~MC~
"Dr. B...why are there Christmas lights all over your office?"
"I think they help illuminate the workspace better and allow for a more easy working environment."
"And why are you playing Christmas Musak?"
"...Peruvian chants?"
~MC~MC~MC~MC~
Sweets was about to ask more when he heard a gasp from the crowd. He, along with Cam, Hodgins, and Angela, turned in time to see Booth spiriting across the course, his long legs eating up the distance. He was going harder and faster than any of them had ever seen and his movements, to their shock, were more graceful and agile than before his sudden 'transformation.'
"I don't believe it!" Hodgins exclaimed as Booth leapt onto a 7 foot wall and cleared it in less than a second. "This...this..."
"This isn't physically possible!" Cam shouted as Booth, catching Temperance's eyes, actually CARTWHEELED over the finish line, letting out a loud, bolsterous laugh. Temperance ran to him, giving him a big hug.
"You did quite well Booth. From what I was able to gather from the rest of those that competed, you have completed all the tasks at a faster pace than what is average."
"Thanks Bones...I think." Booth said, before leaning down and giving her a kiss, Temperance returning the smooch in a very out-of-character, un-Temperance way.
One of the newer agents walked by Angela, giving her a smile. "Your dad can sure move...I'd go that fast too, if I were married to your mom and got kisses like that!"
Angela blushed, too embarrassed to correct him.
As they watched Booth and Temperance celebrate, none of the squints noticed Sweets pull out his cellphone.
"Yes, its me...yes, I just saw them, and you are right to be concerned." He paused. "I will need to watch them for a while longer before I can determine if they are a danger to Parker...yes...yes...I will let you know, Rebbecca."
~MC~MC~MC~MC~
Author's Note: Yup, you just knew someone would screw things up! Don't worry, Sweets will get his just desserts (and knowing me, it will be hi-larious!)
