Hello again my lovely readers! So I am still horribly ill, which means I have been spending a lot of time alone. So this means I have been writing like crazy, however, it also means I'm lonely, which is making me slowly lose my hold on the wall that separates sanity from insanity. Anyway, thank you to my lone reviewer of last chapter, Olivia-Ivy, I'm glad you liked the Eric x Gabby last chapter. As always review and I'll love you forever! No, I still haven't acquired a certain Dauntless with a bunch of facial piercings or the rights to Divergent. Let me know what you think of the chapter!
Chapter Seven
Gabby's POV
When I finally make it back to the dorm everyone is nearly finished getting ready. Jeff is sitting on the edge of his bed putting his shoes on, "When did you get up this morning?"
I walk over to our dresser and start pulling clothes out, "Like an hour ago." Jeff studies me in the way that only a Candor can, "I went to get pain killers last night and I was waiting for them to kick in and I fell asleep."
He continues to study me skeptically for a moment, "So you slept at the infirmary again?" I nod, hoping I am a better liar if I don't actually talk. I can tell he isn't convinced, but he stills drops it and going back to tying his shoes.
"I am running late, will you go get me some food while I take shower?" He complies, although he complains about how I never get my own food until we reach the roof. As we wait for the train I scan the crowd, but Eric isn't there, just Four and the seven of us transfers.
Once we have all piled in to one of the train cars we settle in for the ride, I end up squished in the corner with Jessica. "Okay, where were you last night? And none of that crap you fed Jeff this morning," Jessica says just loud enough that only I can hear her above the wind rushing by the moving car.
"I told you guys this morning, I went to get pain kill…," I start but Jess cuts me off and stares me down.
"I may not have been Candor, but I'm not stupid Gabby."
I think for a minute and then growl, "If I tell you something, you have to promise me that you don't breathe a word of it, to anyone." I pause before adding, "That includes Carl and Jeff."
She nods, "Yeah, yeah, get on with it woman."
"I fell asleep at," I pause weighing whether it is in my best interests to tell her the whole truth, "a guy's apartment."
She smirks and wiggles her eyebrows, "Knew it. Who? I never see you with guys other than Jeff and Carl," She pauses for a moment to think, "One night stand?"
I gasp dramatically, "Who do you think I am, Jess?" I bat my eyelashes at her innocently and she laughs. I laugh too, before continuing more seriously, "I never even said I had sex with him, all we did was sleep."
She studies me for a moment, "Ok, but you still haven't answered my question, who?"
I am about to answer when the train breaks and we all tumble forward, Four turns to us from the doorway, "Everybody out!"
xxxxxxxxxxxx
On the way back to headquarters I find myself hanging partially out the door, watching the city go by. I have managed to avoid Jessica enough all day that I haven't had to answer her. Maybe she will forget about my mystery man until after initiation.
I look up just as we pass Erudite headquarters, a wave of homesickness hits me like I've been stabbed in the heart. I have managed to keep myself distracted enough to not think much about home, but for the first time since the day of the choosing ceremony I find myself wondering what my parents and Andrew are doing. Are they missing me? Visiting day is only four days away now, will they come?
I have been trying to avoid thinking about home as much as I can. When I transferred I thought that it meant that I left everything about my old life and my family behind, I needed to forget about my past and focus on my new life. Faction before blood; but I was wrong.
Part of me will always be Erudite; I still think like one sometimes, sixteen years of mental conditioning isn't that easily undone. More importantly my family will always be a part of me. I have my father's eyes, my mother's nose and chin, and Andrew's gestures. It doesn't matter if I left my family, or how long I'm gone, they will always be a part of me.
I realize now that you can put the past behind you, but you should never forget. Your actions and experiences before this moment, good or bad, are what make you who you are. Inspiration hits me and I make a decision about how to spend my evening.
As soon as we get back to headquarters Four announces that he is letting us go early. I grab Jessica's arm and drag her to the tattoo parlor, ignoring her confused questions. Inside an Asian woman with grey streaks in her black hair meets us at the door. The tattoo on her neck catches my eye, but I need to focus on the task at hand before I lose my nerve. "I'm here to get a tattoo, right here," I respond, indicating the spot between my shoulder blades.
The woman chuckles, "Well that's what I do, what do you want?"
A little while later I am holding a hand mirror so I can study my back in the full length mirror behind me. The eye representing Erudite stairs back at me and I smile, remembering how Andrew used to yell at me for being illogical when I was a child and insisted that the eyes around the complex followed me when I walked by.
Tori, the tattoo artist, finishes a smaller version of the symbol on Jessica's shoulder and we decide to go find the guys. We see them on the other side of the pit and start toward them, but when we are still a ways away Jess grabs my arm and stops me, "I'm letting it go for now," She whispers, "But don't think I forgot about my question from this morning." Damn
xxxxxxxxxxx
The next evening I'm standing next to the chasm, holding a cold glass of water to my freshly bruised jaw. I fought Jeff today, he went easy on me, but I still ended up losing.
"What are you doing, princess? Contemplating how useless this is when you're just going to end up factionless in a day or two?"
I turn to find Justin behind me, sporting a black eye, busted lip, and a bandage on the side of his neck covering a fresh tattoo. I take a sip of my water before replying, "Yes, but it comforts me to know you'll be coming along."
Justin laughs and slaps me on the back, his palm landing on the still tender location of my tattoo. I flinch and Justin's eyes widen, "Bruise or tattoo?" He asks trying to pull my t-shirt away so he can look at my back. I whirl around to elbow him in the side but he catches my arm, "Oh, calm down princess."
I shake my arm loose and start to walk away, "Oh come on, you know I was only joking Gabby." He catches up to me and throws an arm over my shoulder, "This is what we do. We banter, I call you a weak princess, and you call me an idiot, or something like that. We keep this charade up until you realize that you're secretly in love with me."
I can't help it, I laugh. After a moment I turn to face him, my face suddenly serious, "Your right Justin." He freezes and I lean in closer until my lips are practically touching his ear, "You are an idiot." With that I walk away.
When I make it back to my dorm I change and climb into my bunk. When my head hits the pillow I hear the sound of crinkling paper, I reach inside the pillowcase and pull out a crumpled note. The lights are still on so I scan the paper quickly before slipping out of the room as quietly as possible.
When I get to the net at the bottom of the member's entrance the room is empty and silent, the opposite of a few days ago. I check my watch, the note said to be here at 11:00, it's only 10:45 so I decide to climb up and lay in the net until he comes. As I stare up through the hole above my head I feel something cold and wet hit my nose. A couple seconds later another rain drop lands just above my eye.
I smile and close my eyes; I've always loved the rain. When I was a child, I used to climb out of my bedroom window; there was a small ledge that I could sidle across to the fire escape off of our living room. Sometimes, I would sneak up to the roof when it rained, lay on the gravel, and stare up at the starless night sky…
I lay with my eyes closed, small rocks digging into my back and tiny prickles of pain radiating through me with every freezing late autumn raindrop that hits my exposed flesh. I am three stories away, safely on the roof of our apartment building and the rational part of me knows I am too far away to still be able to hear them, but every few minutes I swear I can still hear my parents screaming at each other.
I hear the gravel crunch as someone walks toward me, but I don't need to open my eyes to know who it is, "What are you doing out here?" I ask as I hear him lay down next to me.
"I…" Eric pauses, shifting back and forth, as if he is actually going to be able to get more comfortable, "I live right above you, I could hear them arguing." He pauses, bumping me as he tucks an arm under his head, "And it's raining, I knew you'd come her to think."
"I didn't hear you come up the fire escape," I observe, trying to pull the attention from myself, and my parent's marital problems.
"How do you stand this?" He asks, ignoring my question and moving his other hand up to shield his face. After a moment he sighs, "No I came up the normal way, my dad's still at the office and you know how deeply my mom sleeps."
I chuckle, "A bold move, sneaking out through the front door, turning fifteen has really changed you."
"Well, you know me, I'm a bad boy," He replies and I can hear the smile in his voice, "Besides, I'm practically an adult now, not a little boy they can tell what to do. I'm thinking of growing a beard."
I laugh, harder than his attempt to make me feel better deserves, but when I'm around my sarcastic idiot of a best friend I can forget that my dad is probably downstairs throwing a bag together and that he will spend the next few nights at his office instead of coming home.
My parents love each other; I can see it in the way they look at each other, the admiration in my mother's eyes when my father is excited about new research he is working on. However, my father's success in recent years has meant that our leader Jeanine Mathews needs him more and more. He is hardly home at all anymore, and I have watched this drive a sizable wedge into my parents' marriage.
That is part of the reason why I know I can't stay. I want to find someone I love and have a family, without my children feeling like they are a burden, getting in the way of my ability to be successful. Or without having to have a marriage based on brief conversations at the breakfast table before heading off to the lab.
"Are you going to be ok, Gidget?" Eric asks, I nearly forgot he was still here for a moment.
Opening my eyes for the first time since he joined me, I turn my head to look at him and find him staring back at me. I nod and we lay there for a moment, our faces inches apart, until suddenly he springs to his feet, "Good, I'm sick of the stupid rain." With that he is gone.
That was the last full conversation I had with him until the morning of his choosing day. I couldn't understand why he had avoided me like I was a diseased freak that whole year, but now it made sense I guess. I am pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of footsteps on the stone floor. I feel the net move as he pulls himself up, positioning himself so we are laying in opposite directions with our heads next to each other.
"I should have guessed you would climb up here when it started raining," He starts, wiggling to make himself more comfortable.
I smile, "That was just a happy coincidence. You have to admit this net is better than gravel though."
We lay there in silence for a moment. I shouldn't feel awkward, but I haven't seen him since yesterday morning, and I hate feeling like a stupid clueless teenage girl, "Eric?"
"Yeah, Gidget?"
I turn to face him, "Why did you want me to meet you here?"
He doesn't turn his head but keeps staring at a spot along the edge of the hole, "What? A guy can't steal a few minutes to see his girlfriend?" As soon as the words leave his mouth he tenses up and I can see the gears turning as he tries to come up with a way to twist his exclamation into a sarcastic joke.
I quickly sit up, repositioning myself so I can kiss him, effectively shutting him up and telling him he that I am pleased with the tittle. When I finally pull back, I can't stop the smile that takes over my entire face; I wouldn't want to stop it even if I could.
He coughs after a second and sits up, "As much as I'd like to continue this now, I have to go meet Four." I follow him to the edge and let him help me down, "I should have let you get some sleep while you could, I guess I'm selfish for wanting to spend a little time with you. I guess we know why I didn't pick Abnegation"
I check my watch, it's only 11:30, "I have plenty of time to sleep," He smirks before turning to leave the room, "Eric, why don't I have time to sleep?" I hear him chuckle but he keeps walking.
I get my answer half an hour later, when the doors to the dorm fly open and I am blinded by the beam of a flashlight shining on my face. "Wake up!" I hear Four yell, I sit up to find the room full of Dauntless.
My eyes find Eric's and he smirks back at me before shouting, "Time for another field trip transfers."
It's finally time for capture the flag people! Sorry, I'll leave now… *slowly backs into the shadows*
