"OK, back on the story ark. Hope you like this. I struggled with it more than normal. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed or commented in one fashion or another.
Only Two Options
Chapter Seven
I wake up and my body stiffens… my old partner is back.
Sarah Walker.
That part of my consciousness that wants to obey every rule the CIA ever thought of. I guess you're happy with yourself, she said.
As a matter of fact I am. I love him and so do you and don't deny it. I shoot back with vigor.
Sandy what you're doing will get him killed.
I've got one question for you Sarah…Why were you not complaining last night. Why wait until this morning to start in on this old argument that we've had for eight months now.
Silence…she didn't have an answer to that one. She knows as well as I do that she is as in love with him as I am. She just doesn't know how to let go of the training she's so embraced.
To call my alter ego a split personality would be completely overdoing it. But she is prominent in my thinking and has kept me in line over the years. I am sure I owe my life to that part of me that plays by the CIA rules. That part of me I call Sarah Walker.
I look over at Chuck as he starts to stir. He is adorable and I just want to squeeze him and kiss him all over. The sound he makes as he wakes up is a sound I want to hear every morning for the rest of my life. I just don't know how to pull it off at the moment.
Don't mess this up Walker. We've had a great time so far. We both know when we get back to LA that we have some things to discuss but until then let me have this time with Chuck.
Are you forgetting something?
Forgetting something.
"Oh shit the dinner party!" I said waking Chuck up from the level of my voice.
"What is it Sarah?"
"Sandy," I said correcting him.
"Yeah, sorry…Sandy. Why are you yelling?"
"Chuck, I just remembered tonight is the night of Daddy's business party. We have work to do," I say to him and dread the argument that we will undoubtedly have about the nature of my assignment.
Why can't he just understand that this is only a job? Does he really think I enjoyed coming on to all of those guys over the last eight months. I ask him the same question after he wakes up.
"Sandy, it's not the coming onto that upsets me. It's the going off with that I can't deal with. Are you going to tell me that if it was me putting the moves on some woman that you would be OK with that?"
"Yes, because I know it would be for the job."
"Somehow I find that hard to believe," he said sullenly.
Come on Chuck, don't be like that. We've had a wonderful time so far. Let's just get this job done tonight and put it behind us. We only have a short time before we go back to LA."
"What choice do I have? Of course we'll get the job done. But I don't have to be happy about the way we do it."
"Look, nothing is going to happen here tonight anyway. I can't be seen by anyone here coming on to one of my dads business partners. All that's going to happen tonight is that I will make an impression on him so he remembers me when I bump into him in New York."
Chuck was not to be consoled I see.
You see Sandy, he is just a distraction. The best thing to do would be to break it off with him.
You've got to be kidding me Walker? Don't even go there.
Silence.
Ok, I'll admit it to you that I love him too. Happy…I said it. But what I want to do for him is keep him alive.
That's where we differ, Walker. I just want him.
X-X
Chuck and I have argued about the dinner party all morning. He finally and reluctantly agreed to the plan. We've had lunch and I am lying on his lap on the large sofa in the music room. We call it the music room because there is a full size Steinway piano in the room. I have never seen anyone play it which amused Chuck to no end.
I have no idea how long I have been asleep when I hear someone join us in the room. I do not stir.
"Hey Chuck…she asleep?" I recognize Mindy's voice.
I can tell by the tone of her voice that she is feeling like the inquisitioner. I know that tone.
"Like a baby," he said. I can hear the smile in his voice.
"Mind if I ask you a question?" she said.
I would love to open my eyes just a little bit to see the look on her face but I don't dare. Mindy is a lot like me and she is very perceptive. I have had more than one discussion with her over the last few years trying to convince her that my cover life as an international banker is real. I know she suspects it isn't. I know too what she is going to ask Chuck.
"Promise me you'll tell me the truth?" she asks.
I feel Chuck's body stiffen. Suddenly, he is aware that this isn't a simple little conversation. This will be interesting. How will he deal with this and maintain his integrity. I can't wait for this to play out.
"If I can," he says.
"That's an unusual response," she says.
"What's you question?" he says simply.
"Is Sandy really an international banker?"
Silence.
"I can't really answer that, Mindy.
"You can't answer that because you don't know or you can't answer it because you can't say?"
"I can't answer your question." Chuck did not attempt to say more.
"Are you really in love with Sandy? Or is there something strange going on?"
"I love her with all my heart, Mindy. There's nothing I wouldn't do for her."
There is silence as I suspect Mindy silently scrutinizes Chuck.
"I believe you Chuck. You're different from that other guy she brought here. I can't remember his name."
"Bryce?"
"Yeah, that's it. Sandy tell you about him huh?"
"Actually, I knew Bryce before Sandy did."
"Really, how so?"
"We went to college together. We were roommates."
"I see. You know Chuck; we all know Sandy isn't a banker. She's not cut out for a job like that. She never comes around anymore and I know it hurts mom and dad. They don't say anything but I know it hurts them."
I mentally sigh; this is a part of my job I detest. Deceiving the people I love.
"Mindy, I promise that Sandy and I will be out here more often."
"Yeah, you mean now that she's finally put Ben in his place. That was just the best. It's all over the neighborhood. Everyone's talking about it. They used to talk about how Ben had some kind of spell on Sandy…not anymore. I guess you had something to do with that huh?"
"I don't know. I guess it would be nice to think so." Chuck said.
"Yeah, I remember when Sandy brought Bryce out here and the day before they were supposed to leave, she ran off with Ben for the night. That's when I knew that Bryce wasn't the right guy for Sandy. He never seemed hurt. He was plenty mad but he was never hurt like you or I would be if that happened to us…We never told her but none of us liked him. I guess you do since he was your college roommate?"
"Mindy, Bryce is dead. He died in a plane crash."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," she said without any emotion. "Mind if I ask you another question?"
"Would it matter?" I hear the smile again.
"Sure it would. Tell me you don't want me asking anymore questions and I'll stop."
"What's you question?"
"Are you an international banker too?"
She knows. Sandy you better get Chuck out of this or he'll spill the beans without even realizing it.
"No, Mindy, I'm not an international banker. I'm a computer guy, just like I said."
"You don't work with Sandy in any other capacity?"
"I can't answer that."
"Last question…Do you know someone named Sarah Walker?"
I stretch and pretend to wake up. "Hey what's going on you two?" I ask sitting up. I give Chuck a small kiss and take my own spot on the couch.
Mindy and I share a look.
"Are you coming to the dinner party tonight?" I ask Mindy.
"Are you kidding? They're the worst. I wouldn't be caught dead here tonight. Don't tell me you're planning on staying?"
"Chuck and I only have a day left. I want to spend as much time as possible here."
"Suit yourself but I can promise you that you'll be sorry."
"I sure hope you're wrong about that," Chuck said.
I knew better than to look at him. Mindy would see the look we would exchange. "Hey Chuck, wanna take a walk?" I say.
"Sure, anywhere in particular."
"Just out," I say standing and reach for his hand as he joins me. "See ya, Mindy."
"Bye Sis. Don't leave without seeing me, OK?"
"I'll see you later Mindy," say as Chuck and I leave the room. We go to the entryway and then open the door.
"How did she hear the name Sarah Walker," I say somewhat accusatorily when the front door closed.
"Don't look at me. I may have slipped and said 'Sarah' but I have never said your cover last name," Chuck said with conviction.
My shoulders slump as I know he's right. How does she know that name?
You need to call Graham.
Three's no way I'm telling Graham that my little sister knows my cover name. At least not until I know how she learned of it.
We walk out to the gardens because there is no one there and we can talk privately. When we are far enough away from the house that I feel comfortable I turn to Chuck.
"You are absolutely sure that you have not said my cover name?"
"No doubt in my mind, Sandy. I have never uttered the word 'Walker' on these grounds."
"Then I have a problem. I have got to know how she found out about my cover name," I say looking at Chuck.
I see that he knows what's coming. "Can you help me?"
"Sandy, she sees right through me. Unless you want me to ask her directly where she heard that name?"
"No Chuck, that's not what I want." I can't believe how naïve he is sometimes.
"Just go in the house find her and start a conversation. When you can, ask her about Sarah Walker. Tell me what she says. Make sure to look at her body language as well as her actual words. Can you do that for me Chuck?"
"Sandy, I'll do my best. I'm just not very good at this you know."
I have to smile at him. "I know, let's just see what happens." I watch him go into the house. I wait for the longest ten minutes of my life before I see the door open and Chuck come out. I can't tell by his expression how things went. I realize that I am holding my breath when he is only half way to me. Letting my breath out slowly, I wait until he finally walks up to me.
"Well…did you find anything out?" I asked searching his features for a clue.
"It depends on what you mean by anything."
"Chuck! What did she say?"
"She asked me once again if I worked with you in an official capacity. When I refused to answer the question she said to tell you to come in to talk with her. She said she would only talk to you."
"What does that mean?" I say out loud but not to Chuck. "What game is she playing? Come on." I start to walk towards the house. Chuck follows me and as we get to the front door he tells me she is in the music room.
"Thanks," I say as I watch him go into the formal living room.
. When I walk into the music room I see Mindy sitting in the chase lounge. She seems to be expecting me.
"Hey Sis, she says.
I notice now since I can look at her that she seems a little nervous. "Hey Mindy" I say sitting down across from her in a gold colored wingback chair.
"We need to talk," I say and assess her response. She is definitely nervous.
"Yeah we do…Sandy I'm taking a chance talking to you like this but I pretty sure I know what you really do, and it's definitely not banking."
"Go on," I say.
"At the end of the school year last year I was approached by this guy who wanted to talk with me about a possible career opportunity…you know working for my country."
I can't believe what I'm hearing. "Are you telling me that you've been recruited as a government agent?"
She stares at me as if she is trying to determine if she is making a huge mistake. "Yeah Sandy…that's what I'm telling you."
"Have you officially joined yet?"
"Yes."
My eyes tear up and I try to blink them away. "Do you have any idea what you're getting into," I say wiping away the tears that fall from my eyes. "What agency?" I ask.
"CIA."
"Well at least it's not the NSA," I say trying to laugh.
"You?" she asks.
I just shake my head up and down.
"And Sarah Walker?"
I don't answer directly. "Do you have a cover name yet?" I ask.
She shakes her head negatively.
"Mindy, do you know what kind of impact this is going to have on your life? Your lovelife?"
"It doesn't seem to be hurting yours."
"You've no idea."
"Is Chuck real or just a cover?"
"Oh, he's real. But that's the problem someone in my- our line of work…it's very complicated trying to maintain a relationship."
"He knows what you do, doesn't he?"
"Mindy, I can't discuss Chuck or his possible relationship to my employer."
"Oh, my God. He's your asset isn't he?"
"I'm not at liberty to discuss-"
"Oh-my-God. Sandy, you've fallen in love with your asset?"
"Like I said Mindy, it's complicated. Chuck is more than an asset but I can't talk about it." I say wishing I could explain to her the situation.
"Sandy, we have got to talk about this later…So, why are you really here? Is this a mission?"
"You know I can't talk about that."
"Sandy, you've gotta let me help you. Where is the mission venue?"
Against my better judgment, and with Walker practically screaming at me to keep quiet, I tell her. "The business party tonight."
"You're kidding. Here at dad's business party?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna make the acquaintance of one of his partners so I can meet with him later.
"Let me help you, I so want my first mission to be an assist for my big sister."
You will have to get the OK from Graham.
"I'll call my supervisor. If I get clearance, OK."
Mindy gave me her best smile which looks a lot like mine. "Thanks Sis, this means a lot to me."
"We got to get clearance first," I say as I try to deal with the ambivalence I'm feeling. Ambivalence because I am excited to be working with my baby sister, and yet the knowledge of what she will be asked to do for her country when her training is complete makes me sad. The isolation, the sense of being disconnected to everyone you are sworn to protect. It's hard.
"I'll make the call but if the answer's no, you can't stay here for the party. You will have to do whatever it is you had planned."
"I understand. Just let me know as soon as you can."
"I will," I say as I get up to leave. Half way across the room I stop and turn around to look at my sister. I see she has stood up as well. She looks hopeful. I walk with long strides back to her and wrap my arms around her hard.
"I hope you are happy with this decision five years from now." I pull away from her but do not let go of her shoulders. "I am so proud of you," I say and turn to leave before we both start crying.
X-X
Chuck, Mindy and I are in my bedroom going over the plan for tonight. "It doesn't get much simpler than this. I just make sure that Jack Harding notices me by spilling my drink on him and apologize profusely for the accident. Then in a couple of weeks Casey and I will go to New York so I can get close enough to him to learn where he keeps his documents for the Hathaway job. I'll be at his house for our first night together and as we get into bed I will drug him and take pictures of the business plans." I look from Chuck to Mindy for confirmation of the plan.
"What do you want me to do," Mindy says looking very excited.
"You and Chuck keep any other guest from joining us. Especially his administrative assistant, Celia Evans. She is rumored to be much more than his AA if you know what I mean."
I watch both of my teammates acknowledge they are ready.
"Chuck are you OK?" Mindy says.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"Chuck, nothings going to happen," I said my hands on my hips.
"Today, yeah. But what happens when you go to New York?"
"Chuck, we've been over this so many times. I will get the information with the least amount of contact necessary." I say my voice rising.
"Somehow that's not very comforting to me. What if the least amount of contact is a lot of contact?"
I don't have a good answer for that and I feel Mindy's eyes boring into me from my peripheral vision.
"Chuck, can we-" I am interrupted by my phone ringing and I am glad. Looking at the caller ID I see it is Graham.
'Yes sir." As I listen to the message he gives me, I feel the blood drain from my head. "Sir, I don't think that's a good idea sir. He is totally untested in this kind of situation. I know sir. Yes sir, I'll tell him. Goodbye sir."
"What, what's going on?" Chuck asks.
I look at the members of my team. I realize that I am feeling emotions that are foreign to me. "There's been a change of plans. Last minute Intel has discovered that Jack Harding is gay."
"Don't look at me…this is way beyond my pay grade," Chuck says.
I would have laughed but my world is spinning. "It seems that Harding's young and beautiful assistant is a gamer. Headquarters believes from her profile that you have an excellent opportunity to get close to her."
"What! They want me to seduce her?"
"That's right. The plan is exactly the same but instead of me seducing Harding in New York it will be you seducing Celia Evans," I say still not believing what had just happened.
Mindy looks at her watch and tells us it's time to go.
Sandy, get a grip. This is nothing you haven't done a hundred times. Quit thinking about yourself and give Chuck the advice he needs to be successful.
I don't want him to be successful.
Whatever happened to whatever it takes to get the job done?
Yeah, well it's not your fiancé that's getting lucky with the mark.
Sure it is…just as much as he's your fiancé. I just know where my priorities lie.
I know where my priorities lie and if that bitch as much as smiles at him I'm gonna-.
Walden…get your head in the game or your man will most likely fail tonight.
She's right Sandy. Chuck will need your help with this. I put my arm through his as we walk down the stairs.
"Don't worry, I say in his ear. I walk you through this. Ok?"
I see a look of eternal gratitude on his face as we join the party.
When this party is over, Chuck and I are going to have a long talk about his mission to New York. I wonder briefly as I greet the first of the party guests I meet, is this the way Chuck's felt for the last eight months. I can't believe I've put him through this.
I great the next guest with tears in my eyes.
