Authors note: Oh my goodness, I am so sorry

Authors note: Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. AP exam studying hit me at the time when I should have been working on an update. All my teachers were like "Oh no, we have, like, a month!" and piled on the hours and hours of homework on top of the usual load. It was terrible. Oh yeah, and college interviews...those are always fun...and finals. I know there is no excuse, and I am sorry for making them. I will try to update every couple of weeks now, though, because of summer! Even during the school year updates should be frequent, too, due to less AP's and better class choices...NO MORE AP CHEM...EVER! Sorry again!


Part 2: Chapter 4: 切腹 Seppuku

Kakashi simply sat in the hospital bed he was given for the past few days. Everyone came to visit him, expressing their condolences, and trying to make him feel better. How was he expected to feel better, though? He couldn't shake the images out of his head; he wondered if he would ever be able to.

It had been right after the Chuunin exams. Seika, Kaguya, and Aburame were said to have advanced to the Chuunin level, while they wished those who did not make it good luck next time. Kakashi could remember that he had been so excited that he had to tell his father. His father, after all, loved to see his best friend, and he knew that Akane adored seeing his father. She thought he was like a celebrity, and always looked forward to when she got a chance to meet him.

The boy remembered that when he approached his house it was unusually quiet. It wasn't even close to being time for bed; it was the middle of the afternoon! He had no idea why everything was so eerily quiet. As the boy opened the door he realized that all the lights were off. His father's shoes were in their regular place by the front door, his coat was hung up, everything seemed normal, but the stillness in the house was still unsettling to the boy.

Walking in the house Kakashi realized just how strange everything was. Nothing was cooking on the stove for dinner, there was no rustle from the books his father was usually seen reading, and there was no sound of vigorous training going on in his backyard. The place looked dead.

As the eight year old continued his way through the kitchen to the living room he started to get a very unsettling feeling. It felt like death, it felt like stillness, it felt…lonely. It was at that time that Kakashi saw what looked like a shadow on the floor. It encompassed a large amount of the living room, and traced itself into the hallway. As Kakashi approached it, however, his stomach lurched.

It was not a shadow.

It was blood.

His father's blood.

He could remember his legs telling him to move, telling him to run away, but he stood still. The ninja in him told him that the enemy could still be in this house, waiting for him to come to him. Kakashi was a child though. He dashed into the hallway and into his father's bedroom. The sight before him wanted to make him scream. No sound was able to escape the boy's lips, however.

In the middle of the room lie his father. He was dressed in white, the blood soaking the once beautiful cloth kimono, and a tantou through his abdomen. Kakashi could feel warm tears burn his cheeks as he simply fell to the ground beside his father. So there was no enemy for Kakashi to worry about after all.

His father had committed suicide.

Kakashi realized he was totally alone.

His father was all he had.

Kakashi just cried.

So that was it? Sitting in his hospital wing all alone, what was he to do next? He couldn't talk to his father any more. He couldn't train with him, tell him how his day was, or even ask for pointers. No longer would his best friend look up to him like a virtual god, and no longer would he be able to go back to his house.

Silence was all Kakashi heard. His thoughts were the only things that rang through the empty, white hospital room: thoughts of what to do next, thoughts of whom to talk to, thoughts of what his future held for him. What was left, anyways? He had a less than successful ninja team, he was being held back by his other teammates, and on top of that all his other friends were always gone.

Kakashi had never been so angry in his life; angry at his father, angry at his sensei, angry at Sadao, and worst of all angry at himself. How could he have not noticed? Sure, his father had been a little upset that the rest of the village was calling him a failure, but was it that bad? If anything, he was far more upset when mom died. His father was a wreck for months.

Kakashi grabbed the sheets of his bed thinking about his family. He couldn't save his mother when she was sick, and he couldn't stop his father from killing himself. If he couldn't save his own family how was he going to save other people? Why was he even bothering keeping himself alive?

Sitting up out of bed, Kakashi simply put on his shoes and walked out of his room. He couldn't stay in the hospital room. It smelled of medicine and sickness. Ever since his mom died he couldn't stand them. He'd rather die out on the streets.


"Gai-chan, we have to bring Kakashi-san flowers." Akane explained, "He must be feeling terrible still."

"I know he is but flowers again?!" Gai exclaimed, "He can set up his own shop soon!"

"Well then, what do you suggest?" she asked annoyed, "We can't just bring his father back!"

Gai simply sighed. He didn't understand why, exactly, but ever since Kakashi's father died Akane had been very sensitive when it came to the topic of parents. Perhaps she viewed Kakashi as she viewed herself. He was an orphan now, or maybe perhaps knowing that Kakashi was so weak upset her.

"Let's just bring him a snack," Gai smiled, "Besides, seeing us should be a treat enough already!"

Akane rolled her eyes as she followed Gai into the village and towards the little shops. Everything that happened, however, was racing in her mind. When she had heard Hatake Sakumo had died she thought it was impossible. Her idol? Kakashi's dad? But…he was invincible, wasn't he? How could anyone hurt him? She wished she knew who did it so she could murder them herself…

After all, she had her pick of 150 ways. 200 if the room was particularly precarious to begin with…

"Akane!"

"Wha-" she stopped before she hit the pole. She must have really zoned off.

"You have to watch out, Seika-Chan, come on, hold my hand!"

Before she could protest Gai had grasped her hand and was in the middle of dragging her off towards a store. Gai simply smirked to himself, despite her vehement protests; he had won this challenge, for now. After all, it was not Kakashi holding Akane's hand now was it?

Inside something told him that keeping up with this competition in Kakashi's time of need was petty. The other said that he really couldn't care less…

"Gai I swear, I said stop!" Akane growled ripping her hand out of his as she went to open the door to Kakashi's hospital room. "Be nice, Gai-chan, or I will kill you."

Gulping, Gai walked through the door only to realize there was nothing there. Kakashi's bed was poorly made. It looked as though Kakashi has attempted to make it as fast as he could. In addition, his friend's shoes and jacket were both gone.

"He's…not here, is he?" Akane asked in a whisper.

Gai didn't need to say anything to confirm her question. He felt a sudden urge to scream at his friend for being so stupid, and the other said that he had to keep a level head. Uneasiness swept through his body and he knew Akane felt it as well. Something was wrong.

Dropping the snacks on the hospital floor, Gai simply dashed out of the room, Akane at toe, and out of the hospital. Kakashi had to be at his house, there was no explanation for anything else. What they may or may not find there was another thing. All they hoped for was that he didn't do something stupid…


Once again, Akane felt herself being dragged throughout Konohagakure by Gai. Her arms felt like they were about to break with the strength and desperation in which he was pulling her. Her shoes, in fact, had fallen off a quarter of a mile back, but Gai paid no mind to that fact. She had to admit, however, that her fear for Kakashi was drowning the pain she was feeling as her bare feet scrapped against the rocks of the Konoha streets.

Gai ignored Akane's small shrikes of pain as he continued to drag her through the maze of people to get to his friends house on the outskirts of Konoha. He hoped that Kakashi had not done anything stupid. For as smart as he was known to be, he knew that his friend could do some pretty careless things when he was being impulsive and upset. Gai hoped that Kakashi had not blamed the village for his father's death, or even worse, and more likely, himself.

"Gai stop!" Akane screamed as she pulled away from Gai, her feet now on a small patch of grass, "Something is not right!"

Gai realized that they had made it to Kakashi's house. The small patch of grass was covered in a thin layer of water. It had rained earlier that day. The sky, in fact, still donned the grey clouds and unseasonably cool weather. Standing outside the house, Gai found it unsettling in the amount of stillness that emanated from the area. It seemed, even after the terrible event, deathly still and quiet. It still smelled like death.

Gai's eyes widened as he heard the door creak open, Akane walking in, with her Kunai drawn. He made a point to follow her lead. Inside, it was hard to see in the eerie dark. The rooms that were once filled with life and light were now dark and cold. Gai could almost see Sakumo and Kakashi reading a book together, or the White fang teaching all of them a new move. Those memories, however, were now just that. Silence was the only thing entertained in these rooms now.

"Something is wrong, Gai," Akane said with an uncharacteristically nervous voice, "Something is very wrong…"

Her breath was hot against her cool cheeks as she walked through the rooms. Her small feet, now torn up from rushing to the house, slid silently across the wooden floor with an assassin's precision and stealth. Even Gai, who was right behind her, would have to call out in a whisper to make sure she was still ahead of him, or still alive.

Her sightless eyes widened as her feet came in contact with something warm and wet. She had felt the sensation many times before. Her line of work required her to almost drown in it sometimes. After all, that was an assassin's life. An assassin can never get through a day without spilling another's blood.

Right now however, she wished that was not the liquid at her feet.

She wished that she could scream.

She wished that it was not…

Kakashi's blood.


Gai's head spun around as he heard his otherwise quiet companion suddenly dash down the hallway. Her footsteps were not the ones of a skilled assassin anymore, no, they were loud and desperate. Gai could have sworn he heard a gasp, too, a sharp pain that emanated from deep within. His heart was sinking as the realization hit him.

Kakashi was in trouble.

Dashing in the same direction as Akane, he was shocked when he slipped running down the hall. All around the floor was a warm, wet liquid. His heart beat faster, and his throat tightened as he realized that it was most likely Kakashi's blood that was all over him and the floor around him. He struggled to get up. His legs were frozen in place, and his breathing was ragged. He didn't want to see what had happened to his friend. He didn't want to see his friend dead. He couldn't take that.

"GAI!" a shrilled scream echoed through the ghostly house.

Gai willed himself into motion as he heard the desperation in Akane's voice. Rushing down the hallway, he followed the sound of frantic cries and desperate sounds of medicine drawers and fabric being torn. In the bathroom is where he found them. The image before him would be one that would stay with him the rest of his life…

Gai's chest constricted. His scream was caught in his chest, and his hands started to shake. He wanted to cry, but his voice was gone. Akane was sitting on the blood-stained wooden floor of the bathroom in a panic. Kakashi was simply lying there, white as a ghost, with two slits through his wrists. The girl had tried, it seemed, to go through the medicine drawer and find something to stop the bleeding, but to no avail. In a last chance effort, she must have ripped off parts of the shower curtains or towels to stop the bleeding. From the sight before him, however, it didn't look like it was helping.

"He's….He's…." Akane was gasping, "Gai he's…"

Gai grabbed Kakashi with the last ounce of strength he had. His hands were shaking furiously. His heart sunk further, even, when his warm hands came in contact with the cold body. His fingers tried with all their might to find any sign of life, but the only sign was a very weak pulse that even Gai didn't know was real. After all, it could just be his own body playing tricks on him…his body may have just willed a pulse to be felt. He wanted Kakashi to wake up and say it was all a joke.

Kakashi simply lay limp in Gai's arm. Blood soaked endlessly through Gai's jumpsuit, and dripped onto the floor in a rhythmic pattern. It took the boy, who was so full of fear, a while to move. In the end, however, it was Akane's pleads to get Kakashi to the hospital that made his rigid legs actually run out of the house.

Gai dashed as fast as he could; he rushed past the starring people, shocked faces, and the many gasps all to get to the hospital on the other end of the village. He was so intent on saving his friend, too, that he didn't even notice that his other was no longer behind him…

Akane sat in the middle of Kakashi's bathroom. She told her body to follow Gai, but she couldn't. On her hands she could still feel the warmth of Kakashi's blood. She could still feel the deathly chill to his skin. A scream was trapped in her throat, but her body could not release it. Fear, for the first real time, was overpowering her.

Many times she had been asked if she was scared of her work. Was she scared to die? Was she scared of being hurt? Murdered? Was she scared to be blind? All of these times the answer had been the same; No-she simply accepted it all. Now, however, with Kakashi's life in danger…

She wanted to run away and cry.

Her body would not let her…


When Gai finally made it to the hospital, everyone was in a panic. They had been looking for Kakashi, and had figured he had simply gone for a walk. When they had seen him in his condition, however, everyone was shocked. Work was started immediately, and Gai was turned away from the procedure room.

"Gai-chan, go home." A nurse said softly, patting his blood-stained shoulder, "Get cleaned up."

Gai simply looked at the floor, nodded a small nod, and walked away. Everything was a haze. Why would Kakashi try and kill himself? Was his father really that important in his life? Was losing Sakumo really enough for Kakashi to call it quits? Was there really nothing left to live for?

Gai walked to the house again. He had a feeling that Akane was still there. As he walked there, though, he couldn't help feel so angry at Kakashi. How could he do that? Didn't he even think of what it would do to all of his friends? Didn't he care that people were going to think he was crazy? He was going to be watched over like a hawk, now, and no one would treat him the same.

Gai walked through the house again. It was still cold, but his anger was enough to keep him warm. In the bathroom sat Akane, just as he thought. As he walked through the door, he was met with sightless eyes. They seemed pained, and hurt. Tears rolled down cool cheeks, even though no sound escaped her lips. Fear was consuming her.

"Come on, Akane, you need to get up," Gai said in a shaky voice, "He'll…he'll be alright."

She said nothing. With a sigh, Gai walked over and pulled her up from her spot on the floor. Her eyes traveled to the ground. Tears from her cheeks fell slowly and mixed with the drying blood that littered the floor. Her small dirty hand tried to beckon them away from her face, but her eyes would not oblige.

With a tug, she walked out of the house with Gai. Her senses were so confused. She was scared, and it was clouding her judgment. Her ears still heard the dripping of Kakashi's blood on the floor. Her nose still smelt the smell of blood. Her hands still felt the coldness of his deathlike skin. She could still taste the salty tears as they fell down her face. With all these sensations occupied, she felt blinder than ever. The only thing guiding her safely to the hospital was Gai's hand on hers.

When they arrived at the hospital Namikaze sensei was already waiting in the waiting room. He seemed upset, and thoroughly disturbed. He could not fathom why Kakashi would even pull a stunt like that. Perhaps the sensei didn't know his student as well as he thought he did. Perhaps none of them knew what Kakashi was really like. Perhaps the Kakashi they all knew was just a mask the boy put up for everyone else. The otherwise mentally and physically strong prodigy of Konoha was actually lonely and fragile.

His blue eyes focused on the two children as they walked through the waiting room doors. They were both clad in blood stained clothing, and looked terribly distressed. The girl, even, would not look up from the ground. It seemed that Gai was the only one willing her to actually move.

"Namikaze-sensei…" Gai breathed out heavily, "Kakashi…he…"

"I know, Gai," Namikaze-sensei said, "They are still in there."

"Will he…" Gai asked in almost a whisper.

"I think so," Namikaze interrupted, "Any longer, however and he would have died."

Minato looked at the two children as they stood quietly. The reality that Kakashi had been that close to death had hit them. Gai let go of Akane's hand and wiped a small tear away from his face. Akane simply sat down in a chair, eyes staring sightlessly at her hands as if she dealt the blows herself.

"We should have known," was all she said, "We should have done more as friends…"

"There was no way of knowing, Akane," Minato tried to explain only to be cut off by her sobs.

"No one should ever feel that alone…" she cried, "Everyone should have something to live for…"

Minato looked to the ground again. She was right. Kakashi, or anybody, should never feel that alone. He should have done more as a sensei to support his student in his time of need. He should have made him feel loved when he otherwise felt alone. He hoped that one day his kids would never feel so alone…

All three's heads shot up as the nurse walked out of the procedure room. She looked tired and frustrated. Taking off her mask, she just gave an exasperated look towards the three of them.

"He'll be alright," she admitted, "He should regain consciousness in a few hours. He was very lucky."

With that she walked away only to leave the three ninjas to wait.


Thank you so much for reading again! Seriously, I love you all! Please review if you liked it!