Chapter 8: Keeping up with the Joneses

There are about ten couples gathered in the conference room of the obstetrics practice. Dr Cranshaw's practice has about six other doctors and so the clinic runs a combined antenatal class for all their patients. The practice has the reputation of being the best in New York and that costs money, which in turn is reflected in the type of patients who are seen there.

As Kate looks around the room at all the other couples she realizes that she's the most casually dressed woman there. She's wearing jeans and a t-shirt, with her hair up in a loose bun, clothes that she thought would be comfortable and suitable for an antenatal class. Instead she sticks out like a sore thumb.

"Wow I'm feeling seriously under-dressed," she whispers to Rick as they take some seats near the back of the room.

The other women here seem to be in two different camps, about a quarter are dressed like they've come from the court room or the top floor office of some financial firm, maybe they've come direct from work, and the rest wouldn't look out of place at some Michelin-starred restaurant.

If your clothes say something about you then these women's clothing shouts money. It's about showing off how much you have or at least how much you want people to think you have. That's never been Kate, and it hasn't changed since she married Rick. She uses the money from her cop's salary if she's buying stuff for herself as opposed to using his money no matter how much he keeps trying to convince her that it's her money too. She still buys stuff from the regular chain stores instead of all-designer gear; she even has clothes in her wardrobe from eight years ago.

"You're still the most stunning woman in the room," Rick whispers back.

Kate just rolls her eyes at that because she knows that he's a little bit biased and also because she wasn't looking for reassurance. She's comfortable enough in her own skin and sure enough of their relationship that she's learnt not to stress about this kind of thing.

There's no time for any further comments as the woman who is leading the class stands up to introduce herself.

"Hi everyone, my name is Anne. I'm a mid-wife at the clinic and I'll be running these classes for the next four weeks. If everyone could write their name on a sticker and place it on their top, that would be helpful. We're going to get to know each other very well so hopefully we'll only need to do this for the first couple of sessions," the middle-aged woman hands out a marker pen and a sheet of stickers to the couple sitting in the front row to start the process off.

"We'll start off by introducing ourselves. Yes I know, it's a bit geeky and very reminiscent of school camps but the friends that you make at your antenatal classes can form the basis of a great support network. Believe me, my coffee group is still the same women that I met at my first antenatal class and my eldest child is now twelve. How about we start with you guys in the back there?"

Twenty heads turn to look back at Rick and Kate expectantly.

"Hi I'm Kate."

"And I'm her husband Rick."

It's not exactly what Anne was after because she jumps in before the next couple can introduce themselves, "Would you guys like to share something else as well with the class? Just something small will do."

Kate and Rick exchange a look, not sure what to add.

"How about what are you looking forward to with the pregnancy?" Anne prompts them.

"I'm looking forward to not being pregnant any more so that I can eat and drink what I feel like again," Kate says.

Anne looks a little bit surprised by Kate's answer, it's not exactly the warm and fluffy response that she was looking for but some of the other women are smiling and nodding in clear agreement with Kate.

"And I'm looking forward to her not being pregnant as well. She can be a grumpy tyrant without her coffee," Rick plays the hen-pecked husband for laughs.

They proceed around the room until everyone has introduced themselves, Kate only manages to remember half the names but she's not too concerned. Somehow she doesn't think that she's going to have the time to attend a lot of coffee groups or play-dates after the baby is born.

Kate spends the next thirty minutes laughing through the video that they are shown which is meant to showcase the joy of birth. She tries to do it silently but her attempts aren't helped by the little comments that Rick keeps making throughout it all.

"Do you think that noise is meant to mimic the sound of a blue whale giving birth?" he whispers to her as 'soothing music' plays as the background track. That comment gets a little twitch of her lips as she tries to suppress the smile.

"It kind of reminds me of when Mother attempted violin lessons, my ears are still ringing from that," he screws up his face and gives a little shudder at the memory. "Seriously who listens to music like that during a delivery?"

Kate gives him a little nudge with the elbow to shut up, someone has to play the adult out of the two of them but in reality she agrees with everything that he's said. The video is so over the top in its attempts to be politically correct that if you didn't laugh at it then you'd want to cringe instead.

"Oh my god is that actress meant to be giving birth or is it a re-enactment of that scene from Alien?" Rick sounds horrified. "How would you explain that to the husband, sorry honey I had an affair with ET?" he says the last part in a falsetto voice. "Do you think that I could get a copy of this for Alexis? It would scare her off sex for years."

A few guffaws of laughter do escape her but fortunately the room has been darkened for the projector screen so no-one else can be sure exactly where the noise has originated from. The instructor does look suspiciously at them though when the lights finally come back on.

"We're going to take a little break now. There's refreshments on the table, please help yourselves. If anyone has any questions about that video then please feel free to come up to me and ask. Just remember there are no stupid questions, there are only questions that we haven't asked yet," Anne says with a bright smile on her face, she's like the Mary Poppins of midwives.

There's an initial awkward pause, like the first day at a new school when you hang back because you don't know anyone else, until finally people start talking to the ones nearest them.

Rick and Kate end up chatting with an overly tanned gentleman and his Stepford wife.

"Hi, I'm Jake and this is my wife, Rachel. You're an author, right? I thought that I recognized your face from somewhere," the guy is talking so fast that no-one else can manage to get a word in edgewise. "I'm a property developer myself, in fact I'm working on a block of new apartments in the Theatre district, Aspire Towers, maybe you've heard of it."

Kate nods politely although Jake is a bit of a bore and she's never heard of the building that he's referring to.

"If you're looking to invest then I could get you a prospectus," Jake says it like he's doing them a huge favor.

"No thanks, we're not really into that kind of thing," Rick politely declines the offer. Unfortunately he does actually know this guy, by reputation at least. Jake's company is well known for tearing down historic, character-filled buildings and erecting drab monstrosities in their place.

"I'm telling you, this thing could make you a fortune," Jake's worse than a used cars salesman with his hard sell approach.

Rick just shrugs; any verbal reply is likely to just egg this guy on further. Fortunately Jake gets the hint and drops the topic but it leaves an awkward silence. Kate's trying to figure out how to make their escape from the situation when Rachel speaks up to diffuse the tension like a good hostess.

"You men; always talking business. Please forgive my husband, he just gets so passionate about his work that he sometimes forgets that other people don't find it quite as interesting," Rachel directs her comments to Kate as if they share some kinship because they're both women. "Tell me Kate, what is it that you do?"

"I'm a cop," Kate replies blandly.

"Oh, that's …nice," both Rachel and Jake seem a little taken back by this, it's almost as if she'd cursed in front of a bunch of nuns. Obviously being a cop is not on the approved occupations list for New York society wives.

Rick finds their reaction funny because his next comments are meant to further scandalize them. "Yeah Kate's a great cop. She's taken me into the police station on a couple of occasions for questioning, in fact that's how we met, she arrested me one day. Between the handcuffs and the bars, how could I not fall in love with her?"

Kate rolls her eyes at Rick's sense of humor, no doubt when they're both old and grey he'll be recounting the same story to their grandchildren about how their grandmother almost arrested their grandfather the first time that they met. She's tried many times to correct him, to point out that he was just being questioned but Rick always says that he's a writer so he's allowed a bit of creative license.

The other couple don't react the same way though, they seem more horrified than anything else and they soon make their apologies and are edging away, eager to make their escape from the insane writer and cop.


Rick's still laughing about it when they get home later that night, "I thought that woman's eyes were going to pop right out of her head, she looked so surprised."

"I think that the word that you were after was horrified, she looked horrified not surprised," Kate corrects him. "Somehow I don't think that we'll be getting any invitations over to their place for a social catch-up any time soon."

"Did you hear what he said about handcuffs darling? Those two are definitely not our kind of people," Rick does a bad imitation of Rachel's voice.

Kate laughs, "Is it too late to sign up for a different antenatal class? I'm not sure that we're going to be welcomed back after your antics tonight."

"Me?" Rick holds a hand up to his chest in protested innocence. "What did I do? I was well behaved, a regular boy scout in fact."

"Firstly we both know that you were never a boy scout," Kate tells her husband. "And secondly, aside from scaring Jake and Rachel off, what about those questions that you asked about nappies?"

"Hey, that woman in the cream suit started it. Seriously she reminded me of those kids at school who just ask the teacher questions so that they can show off how much they already know. Ecologically is it better to go with the biodegradable nappy liners or the nappy laundry service?"

"Ok, so she was being a bit of a showoff with that question but did you really have to egg her on by asking if the liners came in a range of colors?"

"The scary thing is that she knew the answer," Rick gives a little shudder at the memory. "That class has a lot of competitive, Type-A, 'stab you in the back as they climb up the ladder' people."

"It's because of the money," Kate says.

"Hey we have money and I'd like to think that we're not like that at all."

"No we're not but then we're not trying to keep up with the Joneses."

Three and a half years ago

Kate nervously smoothes down the black satin of the cocktail dress that she's wearing as they wait for the car service to pick them up. Rick's picked up on the way that she keeps fidgeting with her clothes and watch, he's never really seen Kate Beckett nervous before so he's not quite sure what to make of it.

"You look beautiful," he tells her as he holds her hand.

"Thanks," she says in an offhand kind of way. Kate knows that she looks good, that's not what is bothering her tonight. It's a big night for her; it's the gala dinner to raise money for her mother's scholarship fund.

"Are you nervous about having to give a speech?" Rick guesses at the source of her discomfort.

Kate just shakes her head, too embarrassed to tell him the reason for why she's as restless as a teenager before prom. It's not the thought of standing up in front of three hundred people and telling them why they should part with a great deal of money. Up there on the podium it will be a bit impersonal, she won't be able to make out individual faces or have to remember people's names. No it's the part that comes before and after the speech that scares her.

It's making small talk with the rich and famous people who are coming here tonight. She's the host so it will be her job to mingle with the guests, to make them feel like they have a personal stake in the scholarship charity, that they're not just there to make up the numbers. If it goes well then these same people will want to come back again next year and the year after that.

Her worry is that she's not sure that she can do it. She's a cop for god's sake, what does she have in common with these people who are coming here tonight? She can't talk about business, or how the stock market is going or what the Ladies Auxiliary Association is doing at the next garden party. And it's not like she can tell them about the drug dealer she managed to arrest today for killing one of his rivals.

This just isn't her world, but it is his. Rick can schmooze with the best of them; he does it all the time for his PR events. He can fit in so seamlessly into this world, rubbing shoulders with the other privileged few. He belongs there and yet at the same time he also belongs with her.

He demonstrates just how well they fit together by what he does next. Kate still hasn't told him what's bothering her but she doesn't need to.

"You're going to do fine tonight. You've captivated me from day one and those people at the dinner tonight won't know what's hit them," he puts his hand under her chin, lifting her head up so that she's looking him in the eye. "So, are you still feeling nervous Kitten?"

"Kitten! Did you just call me Kitten?" she splutters out in an indignant tone.

Rick just grins; it's worked because she's no longer nervous.