Due to the lateness of the hour, the training salle was empty except for the presence of a lone knight deeply immersed in the graceful performance of a high level kata and an observer inconspicuously off to the sidelines. Once completing the exercise, the bare-chested young Jedi retrieved a towel to mop his sweaty brow and turned to address the solitary spectator.
"It appears that I'm not the only one who had trouble sleeping this evening. I'm done if you have need of the room."
"That won't be necessary," the other Jedi replied. "Like yourself, I was suffering from a bout of insomnia and noticed you in passing on my way to my favorite spot in the meditation gardens. I apologize if my presence disturbed your concentration."
"Your being here wasn't a distraction at all," the younger man allayed, "If anything, it felt all too reminiscent of my apprenticeship. Any comments on my execution? I've never known your eagle eye fail to detect the minutest misstep."
In the familiar setting of the training salle, Qui-Gon could have easily reverted back to his role as the rigorously disciplined instructor to his devoted dutiful padawan. Noting with a sad sigh, "You've graduated from my auspices, Obi-Wan. You no longer warrant constructive criticism from me. However, since you asked, I thought each element was elegantly rendered and your presentation, one of the finest I've ever seen."
It was a splendid compliment to the erstwhile pupil who had never earned better than a 'well done' for his diligent efforts in the past. Knight Kenobi deferentially dipped his head. "I appreciate the kind appraisal. Enjoy your meditation," he added as he turned to head for the showers.
"Obi-Wan," Jinn appealed, halting the young man in his tracks. "Are you amenable to a long overdue candid conversation with your old master?"
Surprised at the offer and being most receptive to the idea, the knight motioned to a bench on the sidelines where the pair moved to sit besides one another.
The seasoned diplomat seemed atypically a tad ill at ease and cleared his throat before beginning the discourse. "I take full responsibility for not being as forthcoming as I should have been during our years together. As you well know, the outcome of my being lenient and indulgent with Xanatos led me to be more strict and reserved with you. Although I maintained distance between us, I thought we shared a good, productive relationship where words were unnecessary and that you knew no matter what...that I cared."
It was a good start, thought the former apprentice who replied, "Your compassion for others is undeniable. Though, truth be told, I never believed your care for me went beyond the boundaries of a teacher for his novice student. That is until the mission to Mejah Bijou."
Qui-Gon visibly paled recalling the event. Obi-Wan had been only seventeen when he was abducted during crucial negotiations between civil warring factions. Planetary security forces took a fortnight before finally rescuing the kidnapped padawan, who spent days in a bacta tank recovering from the torturous beatings inflicted upon him.
"In between the pummeling and threats to kill me, my captors continually taunted and laughed, asserting that my life was as meaningless to you as it was to them because you wouldn't cooperate. But, I understood. As a Jedi, I was prepared to die because I knew the risks and accepted that the mission always came first. Ultimately, I remember waking up to see you at my bedside, beaming with a tremendous look of happiness and relief on your face. It was almost worth the daily thrashings I suffered just to witness such an overtly tender reaction from you."
"Back then, I was fraught with worry," the master insisted. "It took all of Healer Sakai's medical expertise to save you. I may not have straightforwardly demonstrated it, but you were my world...my reason for living."
The admission was poignant, however, the young man sadly pointed out, "And yet, at hearing my improved prognosis, you began to drift back to your old reserved self. That's when I began to fall into a depression. I concluded your joy was more alleviation from guilt than anything else, until I discovered just how much you truly cared."
"What happened?"
"Healer Sakai noticed my disquiet as you were becoming more detached. Deducing the cause for my moodiness, she took it upon herself to reveal how concerned you were for me. How distraught you became early on when she apprised you of the possibility that I might not pull through. How you spent countless hours at my side, holding my hand and encouraging me to fight, live and not leave you."
Jinn freely acknowledged, "The stark realization of actually losing you threw my emotions into utter turmoil."
"During another private moment, she inadvertedly espied you crying and overheard you profess that if the force took me, it may as well take you, too." The young Jedi paused, touched by the sentiment, "So it goes without saying that I know you care. I took great comfort in what Healer Sakai told me because after my full recovery, life went on as usual for the both of us."
Qui-Gon hastened to submit, "But, if you're aware of my deep feelings for you, then you can fathom how letting you go was not as easy as it seemed."
Skepticism marked Obi-Wan's tone as he begged to differ. "Judging by your split-second decision, the dismaying fact that you deemed it unnecessary to address the issue further with me and coupled with the urgency with which you sought to propel me to knighthood sans my Trials, I clearly derived that the choice for you was not a difficult one."
"You may have perceived it as me casting you aside, I saw it as me setting you free. I thought you would have been pleased and eager to strike out on you own and not have to continue catering to my every need and whim whilst following two steps behind and one to the left of me."
"If you had promoted me with no other intention in mind other than my suitability, I would have felt honored ascending the Jedi ranks. As it is, I am a full fledged knight, even though I earned my title under extenuating circumstances. Let's leave it at that."
"Let's not." Jinn strongly contended. "That day in chambers, I was annoyed and impatient with Council. I never meant any disrespect with what I concede was a tepid assessment of you. Afterwards, I left you alone because I wanted the tension between us to abate."
"Honestly? Or were you just waiting for me to placate you, which was what I finally did when I apologized in the forest on Naboo."
The conversation reached a standstill until the older man granted, "Even though I had declared you ready for your Trials, I can see how I did not accord you the proper respect you deserved. Need I state the obvious. Anakin became my main priority and took over my primary focus. I know I let you down, but what would you have me say, Obi-Wan? What are the appropriate words to make up for all the hurt and pain I've caused you?"
"I don't expect you to apologize for being who you are and doing what you wholeheartedly believe is right. If anything, you've instilled in me the importance of duty and opening up one's self completely to the Force. However, understanding your motivations doesn't lessen the sting of being unceremoniously dismissed."
The heart of the matter was that the master knew he had shortchanged his former apprentice and he was adamant in correcting the oversight.
"It's my failure that you interpreted my impulsive actions as a rejection. The reason being because you're not fully cognizant of the real regard I hold for you."
Qui-Gon went further to confess, "Though I've moved on with the responsibility of training Anakin, a day hasn't passed where you haven't been in my thoughts." He paused. "I miss you. I've missed you ever since I returned from Naboo only to arrive at our quarters to fully grasp that you were truly gone. Discovering that you had cleared out nearly all your belongings from your art sketches to your ceramic teal tea mug struck a bitter note of finality with me. I stared for the longest time at the only remaining reminder of you which was the model starfighter hanging in the corner of your room that you constructed the first year you became my padawan."
"I left it for Anakin. I thought it would brighten what was to be his new home." The Jedi master laying bare his emotions was most illuminating to the younger man who asked, "What is it exactly that you want?"
"For one, to thank you for saving my life."
The knight noted, "You've already expressed your gratitude to both Xan and me."
Jinn shook his head. "I'm referring to Naboo. It would have been grossly negligent of me to have died not having set the record straight regarding you. I'm sorry that it took until this moment to openly acknowledge that you were not merely a good apprentice, Obi-Wan, but an exemplary one. If you question my respect and admiration for your talents, then doubt no more. My esteem for you is not only that of a master for his apprentice, but also of a Jedi towards his fellow peer."
Elaborating moreover, Qui-Gon continued, "Like a gardener, it was my responsibility as master to provide sustenance and nurturing in order for you to blossom and flourish. You'll always be special to me because you took upon that role as well. I was in an abysmal state withering away until you came into my life and revived it."
Placing his hand on the young man's shoulder, he spoke with the ring of veracity in his voice. "You stand among the finest knights of the Order and with good reason. Masters come to me after each of your successful missions to extol your virtues and remark how proud I must be. And Obi-Wan...," Jinn spoke earnestly, "...I am proud."
Suffused with warmth that touched his soul, the knight modestly demurred. "The credit is yours since I am the product of your guidance and training."
The master negotiator saw hope on the horizon. "You ask what I want. If you can find it within your heart to forgive me, I'd like nothing more than to be your friend."
Putting the past behind him was a welcome concept, but there was still one more topic to consider. "What about Anakin?"
Jinn didn't bat an eye. "After our previous pirate encounter, I consider your cautionary advice to be unbiased and sound. I'm keeping a closer watch on the progress of my padawan and those associating with him. He needs you in his life, Obi-Wan...So do I."
Naboo had stressed their relationship to the breaking point and for over a year, the knight believed that they were destined to walk separate paths. It was a shame that it had taken so long for his master to fully acknowledge his worth as a Jedi, but once conveyed, the magnitude of admiration truly humbled him. The genuinely contrite man was presently channeling his love and affection for his former padawan so strongly that he knew the rift between them would eventually heal. After all, forgiveness was an ingrained part of Kenobi's nature.
"Considering your enlightening candor," the young man reckoned, "I'm all in favor of a new beginning."
For the first time, Jinn appeared to finally relax. "Obi-Wan, don't you think it's high time you called me Qui-Gon?"
Flashing a grin, the knight agreed.
The executive suite at the Off World corporate Towers on Coruscant's upper levels was spacious and opulently furnished. Xanatos stood facing the breathtaking view of the city's skyline, totally absorbed in his innermost thoughts. The swish of the door announced the arrival of his guest recently summoned by request.
"Still hanging about?" Obi-Wan quipped, "I thought you'd be well on your way towards some customary pleasure palace retreat by now."
Pouring his friend a glass of refreshing nectar, the noble remarked, "Not quite. But that does give me an idea for your next naming day celebration."
Nodding his thanks, the knight took a sip before letting slip, "Actually, it may surprise you to learn that I'm neither offended nor opposed to your efforts to make a hedonist out of me."
"So there is a definite wild side to Knight Kenobi hidden beneath your pristine starchy Jedi tunics after all."
Setting down his drink, the younger man reflected, "There are as many complex facets to my personality as there are to a mysterious enigma such as yourself."
Xanatos notably observed, "You seem for lack of a better word...chipper."
"Before your urgent comm call, Qui-Gon and I managed to reach a tentative peace," a cheerful Obi-Wan revealed.
"It's about time. I'm happy for you both."
Immediately, the knight noticed that although sincere, the Telosian was brooding.
"What's wrong, Xan?"
The tense noble began to pace. "I regret having to cast a pall over your pleasant tidings, but I called you here specifically because I have vital need of your covert assistance."
As if sensing the importance of the matter, the young Jedi reassured his companion, "If you want my help, all you have to do is ask."
"Easier said than done, for I have no wish for you to compromise your loyalty to the Jedi or to jeopardize your position within the Order. We've come to be as close as brothers, Obi-Wan and I know you're an honorable man. By taking you into my confidence, I must have your solemn word that you won't report to a soul on Council. This includes the venerable Master Yoda. If that's too much to ask than it's best that we forget this conversation ever took place."
The gravity of the situation was evident from the binding condition set. However, the knight sensed no hint of deception or darkness from his somber comrade. Only waves of agitation and anxiety.
"I may be considered a by the book Jedi, but I've also been known for performing the occasional rebellious act if I feel it merits the circumstances. Trust me, Xan. If your cause is a just one and of the Light, I'll be willing to help you to the utmost of my ability. Even to lay down my life, if necessary."
It not only immeasurably bolstered the noble's confidence, but his spirits as well to realize that he would not have to face an upcoming battle alone. Together, the intrepid pair would form a formidable force against a daunting and dangerous adversary.
"Then, take a seat, my friend, for I've a chilling tale to tell about my literally shocking meeting with a megalomaniacal Sith Lord."
"Do you understand now why I can't go to Council with this. My standing with them, regardless of my charitable contributions of late, is tenuous at best. Once they learn of the Sith Lord's interest in recruiting me, they won't take any chances. They'll probably lock me up in a force shielded room indefinitely while they twiddle their thumbs over the next course of action to take."
"Xan, just what do you intend to do?"
The fallen Jedi answered with steel determination. "Try and beat the Dark devil at his own game. He's not the only savvy, ruthless and conniving player in the galaxy."
"Before embarking on such a dangerous endeavor, you should probably see a healer, " Obi-Wan suggested while admiring the huge bruise blooming on his friend's chest. "That nasty looking wound looks rather painful."
"I assure you, the only thing still hurting is my pride for letting my guard down. Something which never would have happened had that crafty smug Beelzebub not known exactly which hot button of mine to push."
"For Force sakes, Xan," the dismayed knight inquired, "What did he mention to make you crack that impenetrable austere veneer of yours?"
The Telosian's ire piqued at the memory, "That slimy Sith slug brought up Pet."
Obi-Wan appeared puzzled. "Pet...Who or what is Pet?"
Staring back at concerned and curiosity filled cerulean eyes, the noble knew without a doubt he trusted the young man before him like no other. In a desolate tone, he explained, "Pet is short for Petalonia. We were only together for a short period, but her influence and untimely death were instrumental in making me re-examine my life and turn away from the Dark side."
Moved by the revelation, the Jedi sympathetically imparted, "She must have been an extraordinary woman to have made such a powerful impact on you."
"My Pet was indeed extraordinary, but she was no woman," a bleak Xanatos clarified, "Petalonia was my little girl."
00mrdragon00 - Thanks for your review and patience! You ask great questions that I'm happy to say are answered in the new chapter. :)
The Burninator Named Trogdor - I'm very sorry about the lack of Obi in the last update, but I hope to make up for it with a double dose of him today. Obi-Wan is typically a forgiving soul at heart, but he won't give in until Qui-Gon grovels a little. I'm truly tickled that you enjoy Xan and you'll get a hint of who Pet is sooner than you think. About Xan going darkside? There's a 50/50 chance. Thanks ever so much for your support. :)
Geri K - Xan can't help but be tempted going dark with a Sith taunting him. Lol! Qui-Gon can be stubborn as a mule at times. Thank you for your feedback:)
charie - Thank you for the lovely comment. :)
Calliope - Greetings! Thanks for your encouraging thoughts. :)
Leah Rydell - Welcome! I'm glad you enjoy the angst in the story. Thank you for the warm review. :)
Nelarun - Thank you for the kind comment. Hard to say if Xan's going to die. He's the type of character that's hard to kill, but he'd give his life to save someone he loved. :)
Dalakh - The Sith are definitely not nice guys. Thanks for your reply. :)
Ann Jinn - No apologies necessary. Always a pleasure to receive a review at any time. There are certainly many facets to Xan's character. Yoda really made headway with Qui-Gon. Thank you for your wonderful feedback. :)
My thanks to everyone reading:)
