Chapter Twenty-nine

Castiel

The sound came through like a bad connection, filled with static interference, enough that it had me sit up in my spot. I was slumped on the bench, my wandering to the girls, to Sam… and to Dean. It had been two weeks since I had brought Gabe home, and while he was improving, I still didn't feel safe leaving him, but, the noise caught my attention.

The eternal Tuesday afternoon continued on, even as I stood from the bench and made my way around the garden, but the voices inside my own mind wouldn't quiet. It hadn't in days. Prayers hummed inside my head, mostly turned into the four back on Earth, but specifically, I could hear the words that Gabe and Jai had whispered to each other in those final moments before I took him home.

The love and devotion in their eyes was incredible to watch, and if I didn't know what love was, I would have missed the heartbreak as I separated them, and that guilt seemed to eat me up inside. Gabe reminded me on an unnecessary loop that it could have been worse, that he could have ended up in the empty, a place where angels go when they had lost their grace, when they weren't allowed back into the arms of Heaven, but that, in of itself, was not any more comforting.

The sound came through once more, with less static, almost as if it were speaking through some sort of pipe, distorted and muffled.

"Cas." I stopped, spinning quickly to see if I could spot the direction that the voice traveled in. Sometimes, depending on the connection, angels were able to zone in on those in their charge, and right now, I was trying to pin down where Gwen's stressed voice was coming from. "Castiel, if you can hear me, we're in trouble."

"Gwen?" I whispered back, not sure that she could pick up my reply, since most of the time "angel radio" as Dean was so fond of calling it, didn't work both ways. Her signal was choppy, there was no way to pinpoint exactly where she was and I felt completely disorientated. "Gwen, where are you?"

"Cas, if you're listening, just pay attention." Yes, she was definitely freaking out, that tone of voice was nothing but anger and anxiety. "Jai and I are trapped. I don't know exactly where, but if I had to guess, it would be Portland. The boys don't know, Cas, they have no clue. Please, Cas, come find us."

And with that, there was silence.

Trapped without Sam and Dean knowing the extent of it? Lost somewhere in a part of the country that they didn't know? I clenched my fists, closed my eyes, and concentrated on locating the Winchesters, but even they were slightly distorted, which meant I wasn't up to power. Healing Gabriel, using as much of my grace as possible to help seal his wounds had drained me more than I realized and there was only one other course of action that I could take.

I opened my eyes to find myself in the hall of doors. A long, white corridor with unmarked wooden doors that seemed to go on forever. Behind each door, sometime in the future, would be someone's heaven, these just hadn't been filled yet.

With determination, I took to the left, heading down towards what could have been the end of the hall if it was viewed right, but it only turned at that junction, going both directions, however, it was the door straight in front of me that I needed to enter.

The large room was filled with several things. A long white table, chairs, and two angels that stood towards the end of it. Anael and Duma. Anael looked up from the papers in front of her, the other angel couldn't have cared less and didn't bother to even acknowledge my presence as I came to a stop in front of them.

"Castiel, to what do we owe this pleasure?" Anael questioned as Duma grabbed a stack of papers and disappeared from the room. I waited until she had gone before turning back.

"I need your help."

"That seems to be your running theme the last few weeks."

"Gwen and Jai have been taken and I can't seem to get a location on them. I'm not strong enough, in my current state, to break through. It's as if something is blocking me from making contact." I explained but watched as she rolled her eyes.

"So, you want more angels to assist you in this," she moved her hands around as if to say something but the only word she added was: "endeavor?" I knew it was coming. She was in charge of Gabe's recovery, and being a total bitch about it. "I already have three on Gabe, with the extent of his injuries, it's taken more resources to heal him than we thought would be necessary at first, Castiel, that means three of your precious hunters without their guardians and now you want more?"

"Just one or two more, just enough power to narrow down their location," I pleaded, of course, it came out more of a monotone reply than anything else and she shook her head.

When I had arrived with Gabriel, we weren't sure that we could even heal what was done to him. Whatever tool the Dragons had used, because Jai refused to call them what they were, had drained Gabe's grace. His internal injuries weren't life-threatening but were covered in a magic that I had never seen.

Angels older than I, not that there were many left, said it was some sort of binding spell, one that lasted as long as Gabe was tied to a person. However, we still hadn't found out who. They were able to close off most of what was draining him, but his grace was only trickling in, the wounds wouldn't seem to heal.

"I'm sorry, Castiel, I can't give you anymore." Anael was stoic as she answered, and as much as it angered me, I knew, deep down, that would be the answer. I nodded at her, trying to quiet my mind incase she picked up on the wild thought I had, and turned, moving out to leave the room, but as I placed a hand on the door, her voice stopped me. "This… war, or whatever your humans are fighting, Castiel, this might need to happen the way it is written. There may be no way to stop it this time."

"You're wrong," I replied, just loud enough for her to hear me, "there is nothing written in any book, ours or Death's, that say this ends here." I took a breath, turned and looked at her, narrowing my eyes, keeping my view on her, "I know, I've looked."

"You can't save everyone, Castiel." Her words were meant to slice, to bring me down, to take that fight out of me, but it did just the opposite and I yanked the door open.

"I sure as hell can try!" I stated and moved out into the hallway.

White, nothing but white, and I reached out a hand to brace myself against the wall. Couldn't they pick another color, liven it up, not make it so uninformed? But, that was reason, wasn't it? To keep the souls confused, anyone that happened to find their door out. If everything was one color, they wouldn't venture out for fear of escape, of not being able to find their way back.

The heat that boiled in my veins was overwhelming. I just needed to get away from her, needed to find someway to get to them, and I moved, with no specific direction, until I found myself in front of the "throne room," a place that has never been used, at least, not in my existence, but I needed a moment. I needed a space to breath and if that had to be it.

I yanked the door opened and stepped inside. The silence was deafening but welcomed, it didn't, however, last as long as I hoped. Hannah walked in behind me, not moments after I had closed my eyes and tried to reign in the fury that was taking over every muscle in my body. I turned to look at her, but only received a raised brow in return. She said nothing, just stood there as if she were waiting on a command.

The slight noise of wings, a light change in the atmosphere and I turned to look at the trio of unused thrones, one specifically made for Father, Michael, and Lucifer, but only in their childhood, as short as that was, to see Balthazar sitting there. He had a leg across the arm and was basically lying across the other, eyes to the ceiling, seemingly bored with life.

The carefree angel looked over at Hannah and I, after a few moments and grinned. "Cassie."

I rolled my eyes at the nickname and watched him sit up. "Balthazar."

"I wanted to check in with you on your little pets," Balthazar smiled.

"Sam and Dean are not my pets, I wish you would stop referring to them like that." I rolled my eyes as I moved around and sat down on one of the couches in the room. Hannah, who had yet to say a word, sat down beside me as I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees. "Jai and Gwen are missing."

"Gabe's little girl?" Hannah said quickly, looking pretty confused.

"Yes, though she's not a little girl anymore." I answered, and watched as she stood, disappearing behind me. "I received a message from Gwen but the signal was corrupted. There was no way to get a reading on where they might be. She assumed they were somewhere in Portland, Oregon, but without more information, it would take a significant amount of time to narrow it down."

The door opened and Samandriel walked in slowly. He looked a little threatened by Balthazar, who had sat up on the throne, as he made his way to the couch across from me, not saying a word.

"I can assure you that the Winchester boys know nothing of this, which is quite surprising considering how far up each others' asses they are." Balthazar grumbled, which had me looking at him. "The amount of time those boys spend fawning over them is nauseating. Really, Castiel, would you just please take five minutes and go down there, if not to check in, then to at least satisfy the older one. He's really starting to grate on my nerves."

"Dean is…" I started to object, but doing so would only add to the suspicion that I harbored more human feelings towards them than I should. "Are they safe?"

"You assigned their health and safety to me," Balthazar smiled, "and as much as I would like to say that it's been an inconvenience and complete waste of my time, I'm finding the fact that I can openly watch them undress… relaxing."

"You're not there to admire." Hannah spoke up, coming back to the couch with a map in her hand.

"On the contrary, the human body is meant to be admired and you've seen the Winchesters, correct?" I watched Hannah flush as she nodded, something I didn't realize she was capable of since there had never been an inclination that she had looked at a man, or woman, that way before. "Then there is always time."

"Castiel," Samandriel finally spoke up, as he watched with trepidation while Balthazar eyed him over. The older angel had no filter when it came to human emotions, even if it was mostly carnal need that he seemed to want to satisfy. "I've just come from the infirmary. Gabriel was asking for you, with persistence."

"Thank you, Alfie," I sighed, using the human name he seemed to have obtained while on Earth. Habit was hard to break, but he smiled at the use of it and nodded, standing. "Wait," the young angel paused, "how are you on grace?"

"I don't…" he paused and looked down at the map that Hannah had spread out on the paper. "Do you need help?"

"I need to locate Jai and Gwen, but there's a wall, some sort of magic blocking me. I thought, with help, that I might be able to break through and narrow down a location." I sighed, because it was probably my last hope. Samandriel had dealt with the girls before, in fact, they helped save his life, so he nodded and came back to the couch, being joined, quite closely, by Balthazar and I held back the grin on how uncomfortable it seemed to make him. "You could all get in trouble for this."

"The hunters we were assigned are dead, Castiel." Hannah spoke up, very too the point. "There isn't anything else left for us to do in this fight, so, helping those who might be able to stop it is worth the possibility that Naomi or Anael might get upset about it."

"Yes, their wrath isn't nearly as harmful as you might think." Balth smiled one of those stupid grins that made me think that he might actually like it a little too much and I nodded. "Shall we get on with this, Cassie, I hear the boys might be in need of a shower soon, and I'm quite taken with the tall one's need for hair products."

I rolled my eyes at this and sighed, "Let's get on with this before we're all missed."

With a small slice on each inner arm, a tiny bit of grace escaped, combining above the paper map. It swirled together, like four little, cloudy wisps, and we watched as they moved with the intent we had pushed behind them until they settled over Oregon.

"You knew they would be there." Samandriel whispered looking up at me.

"Yes, but I need more of a precise location." Hannah moved as I spoke, returning with a map specifically of the area and I nodded, "thank you." Laying it on top of the larger paper, slipping it beneath the twirling balls of light, we watched as it landed, charring the paper. I looked up at Balthazar, who was staring me directly in the eyes. "Forest Park, Portland."

"Witch's Castle, quite appropriate." Balthazar laughed and I shook my head. Hannah quickly excused herself. Samandriel took one more look at Balthazar, blushed fiercely and vacated the room in a rather haste fashion. "Well, now."

"Tell me," I whispered, and watched as Balth moved back towards the throne, sat down daintily and smile, hands on each of the arms. "You're keeping something from me."

"I wouldn't dream of keeping anything from you, Cassie, but Dean might be." I rolled my eyes again, because there wasn't a thing I didn't know about Dean Winchester. "His nightmares have been getting worse."

"I know that."

"No," he sat forward, "I don't think you know the extent of it. They're prophetic, Cas, possible futures, event, or… deaths, in a nutshell."

"Don't you think," I snapped and paused to collect myself, "don't you think I know that? I have been running interference between Dean and those left over parts of hell for ten years, Balthazar, please do not assume that I don't know what is going on with Dean, or Sam. I know full well what is at stake and what the cause is."

"Fine," Balthazar sighed, adjusted the scarf around his neck, some fashion accessory that just seemed so like him that I scoffed at it. "The boys are in Nevada, looking for a Simson's Hedgehog Cactus, not that I need to know, nor want to care what it's for, but the prospect of the two of you trying to to fit it into your playtime intrigues me, so, Cassie, brother of mine, what exactly are those boys looking for?"

"Have you see anything else that they've collected?" I whispered, so out of the loop that I felt myself dizzy with worry.

"Several things, actually, mostly strange plants and stones." I nodded as I listened to his answer, which meant the girls were on the hunt for other objects, things that Jai would be an expert at stealing and Gwen would be a master at finding.

"Thank you," I said softly and nodded, but I turned and made my way to the door just as Balthazar cleared his throat, stopping me.

"You might want to tell them one of these days, both of them," his voice was gentle, something I hadn't really counted on from him. He was, after all, one of the most human of us, other than Gabe, but his tendencies never really leaned towards feelings. I slowly turned, looked him in the eyes as he raised a brow and shrugged. "Before this is all over, Castiel, before the end comes too near, you should confess to Dean and Gwen, confess everything."

"I'll keep that in mind," was all I answered and grabbed the handle, moving out into the hallway once more.

This God forsaken color! I never wanted to see white again, no matter how long my existence was.

I entered Gabe's room quietly, the door slightly ajar, and saw him sitting on the edge of the bed. His face was still pale, as it had been for the last two weeks, but his eyes, the bright honey-gold and green that seemed to glow with his inner grace looked alive and well. He shifted, moving to stand, but I raised my hand, which stilled him.

"Hello, Gabriel." I spoke quietly, watched his eye twitch at that noise and he raised a brow. "How are you feeling?"

"Where's Jai?" He asked, his voice low, still sugar-coated, which was something that he had always projected, a way to coerce people into giving him the information that he wanted. "I was tracking her, could feel her, and she suddenly disappeared."

"They're trapped in Portland." I answered honestly, moving closer as he spoke, resting my hands on his shoulders as he tried to stand. He would have run headlong into battle if I hadn't stilled his movements. "You need to rest, you're still not well."

"To hell with that," he snapped, "she needs me."

"We all need you, Gabe." I sighed, releasing him. I turned, grabbed the chair in the corner and pulled it to the bed. "Now, how are you feeling?"

"Useless." He ran a hand down his face and sighed. "I should be down there with her, with them, fighting this thing, but I'm up here, sitting around in my…" He looked down at his clothing and shrugged, "I don't know what to do."

"Heal," I said softly, "it's all you can do."

"What's going on?" He narrowed his eyes at me. "You said they were trapped but there's something in your eyes, Cas, something else, what is it?"

I came to the conclusion that I might as well confess to whatever was going on and I took a deep breath, centering myself. "Whatever has them is blocking magic, even angel grace. It took some help from Balthazar, Hannah, and Samandriel to get the location down enough that I could pinpoint exactly where they were."

"And, you're going in alone." I could see the emotions that cascaded over his features, like he went from one side of the spectrum to the other. "You're an asshole." Leave it to Gabe to not care whether he was sitting in the middle of the Host of Heaven or in a bar somewhere. He would never change, and for some odd reason, I couldn't help but smile. "Those girls need you, all of you, and you're going to go in there, guns blazing, not waiting on backup because you're too pig-headed to try and see the bigger picture. That and you've been so far up Dean's backside for ten years that you don't see the difference between being a hero and being stupid."

"I don't understand why you're getting upset," and I really didn't but he rolled his eyes.

"You're going to walk right into it," he whispered and shook his head. "Cas, you're giving them what they want, a vessel. By not waiting for Sam and Dean, you are handing them the most powerful thing they can use against those girls. You."

"I have no intention of giving them anything." I stood suddenly and paced the room, needing to move because I knew he was right, but there was just one thought stopping me from listening. Gwen. I had to get to Gwen. "We have a plan."

"And we all know what happens to plans, even the best laid ones." Gabriel scoffed and stood from the bed. He moved weakly, hand on his side like something inside pulled and I eyed him over. He should have been healed by now. It shouldn't have taken him this long, and I suspect that it wasn't a physical thing holding back his recovery. "They need you to be smart about this, Little Bro." Gabriel reached out and placed a hand on my arm. "I need you to be safe. Promise me that you'll wait for the boys to get there."

"I can only promise if the girls are not in immediate danger." It was the best reassurance that I could give him.

"Ha!" he bellowed, "have you met Jai Lancing? The possibility of Immediate danger seems to be her middle name, along with headstrong, psychotic, and irrational." Gabe rolled his eyes, moved back to the bed, like something had been sucked out of him, and slowly he sat down. "I can't get her out of my head."

"You shouldn't worry about it," I replied, knowing what he was going through. He hadn't ever stopped thinking about her, not since she was a child. "Gabe," I paused as the thought went through my head several times. "is she yours?"

"What?" His eyes snapped to mine and it took a moment to register the question. "God, Father, whatever, but no! She's just… there."

"Like Gwen?"

"And Dean." I nodded because there was no denying that Dean and I shared something profound. "Just ingrained into my memories, my heart." Gabe shook his head and looked at the ceiling. "Just go, so, that you can get back."

"I'll keep them safe," I swore, and it wasn't just words, I wanted to get down on my knees and promise him, but the look in his eyes told me that he trusted me completely.

"I know," he bowed his head, closed his eyes, and nodded. "Cas," his voice stopped me as I went to leave the room. Looking over my shoulder at him, I saw the pain in his eyes. "Stay safe, little brother."

"I will."

And with that, I was standing in front of The Vagabond Inn, in Bishop, California. Narrowing my eyes as the sun beat down, I let out my "feelers" as Dean called them, to locate the room that Sam and Dean occupied. Without preamble, I found myself standing in the middle of the brightly colored, beige-painted room.

It was empty, for the most part, with only two duffles on the beds, clothing piled on the floor. The unmade beds told me that at least they got some sleep but the paperwork on the table informed me that they might have caught a case in addition to the ingredient they were searching for.

The door to the bathroom opened quickly, bringing me straight back to the sight of Dean walking out, toweling his hair as he stepped forward, the only thing on was his jeans and those were unbuttoned and unzipped. He was shirtless, sockless, and damp, and I swallowed as hard as I could to get past the lump in my throat.

Dean stopped, slowly lowered the towel, eyes wide as if seeing me was a shock, but he dropped the cloth in his hand and took two steps forward, closing the distance between us, only to fist his fingers at his side and take in a deep breath.

"Heya, Cas," he whispered, dryly licking his lips, a motion that drew my eyes to the fact that they were red and chapped.

After watching the motion, biting back the flare of heat that passed through me, I looked up to meet his eyes. Sam was obviously not in the room, which made it difficult to decide on whether or not to lay all the information on Dean or not, but time seemed to be of the essence now and I took a deep breath, stilled my clenching hands and took a step towards him, closing that space.

"Hello, Dean," I couldn't get my voice above a whisper, trying to keep the want and need low and hidden, "we have a situation."

Witch's Castle - Forest Park, Portland, Oregon

Where I arrived was on a dirt path that led past an old stone house. The building itself was dilapidated and held very little of its wooden structure, but the stones held up nicely, giving it the appearance of being haunted. I rolled my eyes because after so long of working with the Winchesters, I found the appeal of haunted anything a little mundane.

Turning in a circle, I narrowed my eyes at the area, waiting until something pointed me in the right direction and it worked. Something, as it turned out, was nothing at all. While I could see the woods before me, the small path that lead towards the water, I couldn't feel anything, or more to the point, there was a void.

I followed the pine needle covered trail, avoiding the branches until I hit the small creek below. Crouching down beside it, observing up and down the flow of it, I tried to detect which way the magic was coming from, but again, there was nothing. Most magic seemed to flow with the lines of the Earth, following a pattern, but as I stood, started to turn right and move upstream, something tugged me back.

Trusting my instincts, I headed down river and within fifteen minutes, found myself standing in front of an old water wheel, something that once helped the now dammed up water flow but a concrete overflow was the only thing needed to hold the water back. I pulled my phone from my pocket, checked that the GPS was still on, but the signal was only one bar, nothing that would help me even if I tried to send a text out.

Approaching the building, I stepped to the left, just under the wheel and set the phone down behind a rock. At least now I knew that no matter what, Sam and Dean could at least track me here, even if they couldn't use a spell to find me.

I stepped into the darkness, overwhelmed by the smell of moldy wood beams and stale water, and took a moment to get my bearings. A flashlight wasn't necessary to find the entrance to whatever tunnels were under the house. In the far right corner, through some shifted concrete blocks, was the flicker of light, probably torches, but it also illuminated the way.

I reached out with my thoughts, hoping to connect with Gwen once again, but there was nothing, no static feedback, just silence and it was very disconcerting. Letting my grace flow, the angel blade that I always carried on me dropped from my sleeve, right into the palm of my hand and I shifted the weight of it until I had a grip on the handle. No sense going in unarmed.

Slowly, I climbed past the pile of blocks, moving in silently to the arch of the underground system. It was definitely torches that filled the otherwise dark space with light, but it was only enough to give a sense of direction. The fact that there was nothing in my head, no voices to distract me was in a way distracting of itself, and I found that I was growing more and more irritated with it.

I came to an intersection, stopped against the wall and waited, wanting something to tell me which direction I should go, because not being able to feel my way towards them only upped my lack of self-confidence. I held the blade to my chest, closed my eyes, and placed my head back against the wall. I just needed a minute to… My eyes opened quickly, and I glanced around the corner. There was a faint noise, something coming from the right, was that…? Jai was singing, probably just to annoy her captors but it was exactly what I needed.

Moving out into the open space, I prepared myself for the battle ahead, but what I didn't hear was what was coming up behind me, not until it was too late. A tap on the shoulder had me spinning around and, suddenly, my nose and eyes were filled with the sting of a putrid yellow powder.

My world slowly closed in, the edges of my sight began to blacken and I felt myself falling, landing on the cold dirt floor before someone in a plague doctor's mask leaned over into my line of vision moments before it went dark.

Blinking aware wasn't like anything I had ever felt. It seemed to start at my feet, the tingles of consciousness made the feeling of pins and needles so much more irritating and I shifted, or at least tried to, but I found that everything else was paralyzed. It felt like eons before it the feeling came back to my face, and I was able to open my eyes, hence blinking aware and I looked around the room I was in.

No, not a room, more like a cage. There were four of them, the only solid wall was the one at the back of all. Jai was in the one across from me, lying on a bench of sorts, her knees pulled up and her arm swung where her knuckles brushed the ground. Shifting, I could see the one beside her was empty, but Gwen was pacing the cell attached to mine.

The deep tone of Louis Armstrong's Nobody Knows flowed from Jai as she repeated the same line over and over in a mocking voice, but that never seemed to bother Gwen, in fact, she seemed very relaxed as her fingers tapped out the same rhythm that Jai was swinging her arm to.

I moaned unintentionally as I finally got enough movement back to sit up and instantly both sets of eyes were on me. Jai swung around, sitting up straight and I looked her over, the swollen, purple and red marks on her face said that she put up a hell of a fight, but there was a light in her eyes that only meant mischief. Standing, I stumbled towards the bars and leaned on them to get a better look at her.

"Hey, Cas," she whispered, and the tone reminded me of Dean, echoing almost exactly the heya he seemed so fond of saying.

"Hello, Jai," I whispered back and just like that, I wanted to tell her everything, but my eyes went to the light orange pulse beneath her shirt. Gabriel's grace. "Are you hurt?"

"Not in anyway that might concern me greatly," she said confidently and sat up straight, cocking a brow, before she smiled. That was a little strange. A simple no would have worked.

"She might have hit her head," Gwen's voice interrupted my thoughts, and I turned quickly to look at her. It's not that I hadn't seen her before but I was focused on her now.

Two steps was all it took, and I was reaching through the bars, grasping at her shirt. I yanked her close, watched the smile go up on her lips, sinful lips that were just as quickly on mine. I could breathe her in, taste her, feel the wetness as I kissed her thoroughly and the noise she made when she reached up to grab my hair made me shake.

"Ew, gross!" Jai snapped and, while that wouldn't usually be a thing to distract, it did give me a moment to process the fact that we were all in cages.

Panting as she backed away, Gwen locked eyes with me. They went through a series of emotions, all depicting what they had gone through up to this point and the blood started to rise. I wanted to scream out, but my powers were cut off, wanted to rip down the walls but it seemed that any strength I had associated with my nature was gone, and I found that all I could do was look her over for injuries. There was nothing outwardly wrong with her and my eyes went to Jai.

"Like I said, she might have hit her head." Gwen wrapped her fingers around the bars as we stood, silently for a moment. "She took on the bulk of them, as always, but they managed to get by us both with magic."

"I experienced that myself." I reached out, running my fingers down her cheek. "I'm sorry I didn't find you sooner. How long have you been down here?"

"Forever!" Jai whined, which had Gwen and I looking at her. She was back to lying on the bench in the same position she had been in when I woke up, but this time, she was just staring at the ceiling. "Seriously, can we start with the breaking out, already? This place is getting on my nerves."

"To answer your question," Gwen sighed, taking my attention back and ignoring the whining, "maybe twenty-four hours. Not long enough to miss the check in with the boys, but I assume you told them where to find us."

"Yes, I stopped and spoke to Sam and Dean, they should be on their way shortly," I looked around the cell, stepped back away from her and proceeded to investigate my surroundings, shaking the bars, watching the way the rock around them moved, but it was going to take longer than we had to get out at that rate. "This isn't good."

"Tell us something we don't know, Angel," Jai whispered but I could tell she was fading. Her hand stopped swinging, the one on her stomach allowed me to see the way her breath evened out and I glanced at Gwen.

"Hmm," was what I got from her as I moved to stand beside her. She was watching Jai cautiously. "She hasn't really slept in a few days, been on edge too much to close her eyes. Either exhaustion got the best of her, or you being here did."

"Why hasn't she slept?"

"Nightmares," Gwen slid down to the floor, something that I mimicked and we sat with our back to each other, fingers interlaced as I took in the space again. "We need something."

"We need a plan." I replied and let the sound of silence fill the room again.

Chapter Thirty

Dean

The undignified howl of pain that echoed through the desert didn't come from me, and I would stick to the story until the end of my days, but the shooting sting that zipped up my left hand had me stumbling back, and the Colt in my hand fired off twice as I squeezed the trigger on reflex.

Catching my breath, I lowered the weapon, stared down at the thing with a look of absolute disgust, and then turned to Sam, who had ducked and covered his face by blocking it with both arms.

"Dude," he growled, all amusement gone in his voice, "did you just shoot the cactus?"

"It got me right under the nail, Sam!" I snapped back, probably not exactly the best argument but that fucker hurt. "Just… grab the damn shovel and dig it up, will ya?"

"Fine," he snapped and went back to getting the plant out of the ground as I stuck the end of my finger into my mouth, sucking hard to stop the blood. "Big baby!"

I rolled my eyes at him, pulled my cell out of my pocket and glanced at the time. We had fifteen minutes to get it and get out, but that was when I noticed something else.

"Hey, Sam," I mumbled, listened to him bitch and moan a what now in response, "you heard from the girls? I mean, I don't usually hear from Jai lately, but Gwen's been radio silent."

"You know how they get, Dean, once they get wrapped up in stuff, they kinda go dark." He huffed, grabbing the bucket beside me as he dumped the cactus in before loading in the dirt. I watched him stop, get this far away look in his eyes, like he usually does when he starts thinking and smoke comes out of his ears but his head cocked a little and he looked up at me. "Now that you mentioned it, Jai would have sent something by now," he shrugged, "a picture or something."

"Don't wanna know what kind of pics she's sending, Sammy, that's all you." I shook my head, put the phone away and grabbed the shovel, while Sam stood with the bucket. "Let's get out of here before someone calls the cops."

"Right," Sam trudged down the small hill before me as I turned and looked over the place. Nevada wasn't too bad, but I was ready to get out of this sand. I was pretty sure I was

taking about a pound of it home in the boots that I wore, not that I usually complained but I just bought these cowboy boots, just wanted to break them in, not ruin them. "You coming?"

"Yeah," I sighed and moved after him.

With the cactus locked safely in the room, which, by the way was at a classier place than we usually went to, thanks to Jai and Gwen and their really odd way of picking out rooms, I sent Sam out for food while I showered off the day, and the dirt. Sand just seemed to get everywhere no matter how many ways you try to keep it out.

The girls were bugging me, not them personally, but the fact that we hadn't heard from either one of them, it was starting to freak me out. I stood in the shower, having done the best I could with the first round of wash, rinse, repeat, and just stared at the wall. The last conversation I had with Gwen played through my head.

"We're fine, Dean," Gwen had whispered after the fourteenth time that I asked her if she was really alright. The break-in at the Tellus Science Museum in Carterville, Georgia was supposed to be simple, but… "She's just a little banged up."

"It's a fossil, Gwen, how can she get banged up over a fossil?" I had scolded, laying back on the bed as I stared at the ceiling, but Sam's laughing, or his chuckling got me to look over at the cheesy-ass grin on his face. Apparently, he had heard this story. "Well, is she okay?"

"Peachy," Gwen had replied, and I could tell she was smiling. "We found the Orthoceras fossil, just like the research said. Unfortunately, it was still locked up in the back lab."

"Yeah, the reason for the break-in, got it."

"She managed to climb in through a series of vents but when it came to the one in the lab, she miscalculated." And, I wasn't smiling anymore, neither was the voice on the line. "Never seen a hunter move so fast, but we're not in the state anymore and they didn't get a good look at the car, which we ditched about thirty miles south before picking up a new one and heading west."

"Okay, but you're good, right?" I just didn't trust it. Why were we stuck on rock and plant duty while they did all the ancient artifact searches? I didn't think it was fair, didn't really like that we were separated to begin with but this one, I think Bobby really dropped the ball.

"Yes, Dean, and on our way to Hattiesburg, Mississippi." She sounded tired, and I could hear the hum of the car in the background. "We're stopping soon, Jai needs her rest, I need to catch up with Ash, and you and I need to video… alone."

Finally, something I could get behind, but as it happened, that didn't. They stopped for the night, shot out a text to say they were exhausted, even after Gwen had gotten in touch with Ash and before I knew what was going on, Jai had sent Sam something about locating a Natchez artifact that was on the list. After that, nothing.

Stepping back beneath the stream, I closed my eyes, pressed my fist to my chest and tried to breath out the oncoming fire. I knew what was happening, fucking panic attack, but Sam was gone, Cas was in the wind and the girls… that only made the pain flare up and the elephant on my ribs grew heavier.

"Ten, nine, eight…" I whispered to myself, trying to breathe in between the numbers, "seven, six…" The ring of the phone interrupted my rhythm and I felt my whole body flinch. I leaned out, dried my hand off and snatched up the phone. "Yeah."

"Dean," Sam's worried voice came over the line, "you okay?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I probably shouldn't have snapped at him, but really, what the hell? "What's up?"

"Stopped to get beer, need anything else?"

I ran my hand over my face and sighed, "nah, man, I'm good, just the burgers."

"Okay, be there soon."

"Sam!" I snapped, which I probably shouldn't have done because the reply was filled with more worry than it should have been.

"What? What happened?"

"Get me some pie." I replied.

"What?"

"Pie, get me some pie. Pecan if they have it."

"Yeah, whatever." He sounded just a little irritated and that made my day.

Setting the phone down, I reached out for a towel. I didn't feel like doing the whole three part process again and I was pretty sure I had gotten all of the sand out of my crack that I could manage without starting to scrub my skin off, so, I was done.

After drying, somewhat, I yanked on a pair of clean jeans and nothing else. It wasn't as if Sam hadn't seen me full-frontal before, so when I whipped open the door, rubbing the towel over my hair, I was confident that he wasn't going to tuck tail and run, but when I pulled the towel away, Sam was not the body in the room.

I stared at Cas in shock, eyes going over every part of him, mentally making a checklist that he was intact and then I moved, dropped the towel, took two steps and covered the distance between us before I stopped myself. I could… right? I mean, it had been two-ish weeks, I could reach out and grab him, pull him in, hold him… right? I was allowed that, but I didn't know, not with how he left and I rolled my fingers up, clenching my fists, stopping myself.

He was so far away… and Sam… Sam was coming back, but if I sent him a text to wait just a bit… that would be alright, he'd understand because this was Cas. I mean, I wanted to… but it didn't need to go that far, right? Goddamn, why was this so hard?

I took a deep breath, licked at my lips, felt my heart pounding in my chest and I tried to just make some sort of noise that wasn't a moan. "Heya, Cas."

And that fucker took a step closer. Personal space, not a concept, and the way he smelled, like earth and ozone, had me trying my best to swallow.

"Hello, Dean," his deep voice sent shivers through me, straight down. My eyes widened. Seriously, could he just not… but, then the world came crashing down, "we have a situation."

"What?" I barked, because I wasn't exactly expecting that. Hell, I wasn't expecting any of this. Cas was gone, up at the pearly gates, looking over his brother, I didn't expect him to be standing in the room with me, not now, certainly not half-naked, but this. "What are you talking about?"

"Maybe it would be best to wait until Sam arrives," Cas sighed, stepping back. No, no, don't… I reached out and grabbed that stupid coat and pulled him closer, enough to feel his body heat.

"No," I sighed, his lips just inches from mine and I could feel his breath, "no, you don't just come out with that and then say wait, Cas, it's not how it works." I just needed to ignore the want, right, just put it out of my head and get on with it, because obviously, Cas didn't come here for me. "Now, start talking."

"Dean," that voice… My knees shook, all the muscles in my body tensed as I stared into those blue eyes. I had seen every emotion, and lack of, in them for the last ten years but what was going on now was utter chaos.

"Cas," I whispered back, tightening the hold on his jacket. His eyes closed slowly, his head dropped, just as his hands came up and rested on my face. I was confused, just a little worried, especially when he put his forehead against mine. Dropping the facade, I moved to wrap my arms around him, hugging him close as I pressed my cheek against the stubble on his face. "Cas, what's wrong?"

"The girls," his muffled voice sighed, "I need to tell you about the girls."

And he did, he laid out everything, every action right up to the point where we stood, and in that time, I never moved. I was shocked still, my eyes wide, my breathing trying to control my heart, and what as worse was that Sam had walked in just as Cas was telling me about the fact that Balthazar was involved and how Gabe was not doing well.

So, he stood there fuming until Cas was done speaking before he opened that door again and marched right back out. I pushed Cas back, still keeping him in my hold and ran a hand through his hair, down over his cheek. God, the shit he's been through.

"Hey," I tried to catch his eyes, and it took a minute, but I had that stare on me in no time. "It's okay."

"It's not, Dean." His tone was low, full of hate and I shook my head.

"No," I said through clenched teeth, "no, you are not doing that, Cas, you aren't taking the blame for this."

"I failed them," his eyes closed.

"Look at me," I ordered, ordered, "Castiel, you look at me!" His lids slowly opened and I was caught in his stare. "We're going to fix this, Cas, you… me… Sam, together, okay. We're gonna fix this by getting our girls back."

"Dean," the pause in his voice, the way it went right back to that deep commanding tone made me shiver, but I knew what was coming.

"Oh, come on, man, don't do this to me."

"I have to go up there alone, you and Sam," he paused, took my hands from him and stepped back, "you need to get the rest of the ingredients. We can't complete this without it."

"You're telling me that you're going to pop into an unknown situation, alone, and leave us on the road for what, twenty-four hours?" I put more distance between us as I reached down into the bag on the dresser and grabbed a shirt. "Not cool, Cas."

"But you know that it needs to be done."

The door opened, Sam walked in quietly, taking a deep breath as he stared at Cas. The two of them exchanged looks like the whole world was about to fall down, and I had had just about enough of everything. I wanted Cas alone, without the worry of the damn crypto-pocolypse looming over our heads but that wasn't going to happen.

"I'm gonna get changed," I announced and pointed a finger at Cas before waving it at Sam, going between them for a moment, "don't kill each other."

Behind the closed door of the bathroom, I could hear them talking it out, something I figured would happen because Sam was such a mushy, let's talk about it sap. It was good though, keeping each other on level ground, but I knew the one thing that I really wasn't looking forward to, and that was calling Bobby to let him know just what happened to the girls.

When I stepped out, the two of them were sitting at the table, being brainiacs. Sam on the computer, Cas giving him all the information he had, with his cell sitting beside Sam's hand, probably turning on the GPS locator so that Sam could pinpoint where he dropped, because if he couldn't get it from way up high, who was to say we could find him again on the ground.

As soon as he was done, Sam looked up, took in the way that I stared, because I was staring, at Cas and cleared his throat.

"I need to grab something out of the Impala," he announced, which was totally not necessary, but he grabbed the keys and hiked it out the door, letting it close softly after him.

Cas stood, moved towards me and all I remember is the way he felt, everything after that first touch was heat, and need, and greedy, unsated want. So, when the knock came, and I knew there was no avoiding it, Cas was sitting at the end of the bed, fingers playing with the comforter, and I was leaning back against the dresser, arms crossed, trying to get my heart under control.

Sam smiled, that cocky half grin that only showed one side of his teeth, before he looked away, blushing. He rubbed his hand over his face and sat down again, trying not to stare at Cas, which made me curious. Shit, my eyes dropped to his neck, to the faint bruise there from where I might have sucked too hard and I cleared my throat.

"I'm not sure if they got it, but they were in Mississippi." Sam announced, changing the subject from the hickey on Cas' neck to something relevant. "If not, it's something we might need to check in on."

"I'll put Balthazar on it," Cas replied, his voice a bit rougher than usual and that made me smile. "I'm sure he'll find it fun."

"Yeah, unlike being a peeping Tom." Sam growled out and I watched every emotion fade from Cas' face. Sam turned and shook his head, "sorry."

"No, you're right, I should have asked, but there wasn't time." Cas moved to stand between us, took a deep breath and narrowed his eyes at me. "I'll see you soon."

"Be careful, Cas." My voice broke. I shook my head, steeled my emotions and watched as he nodded, eyes still locked on me before he disappeared, popped right out of the room. I shook off the strange feeling of impending doom, and I say that strictly because all I could think of was the blank expression on Sam's face. He was looking at another loss, and I couldn't let that happen. "So, are we packing it in or what? Our next stop is in Idaho."

"You're just gonna do that?" He spoke softly, but I could see the anger building. "Just gonna say fuck it, let's go hunting, when Jai and Gwen are trapped somewhere, in whatever state, maybe dying."

"Sam," I closed my eyes, because I knew the total freak out was going to happen, before making my way towards him. "Sam, you know that's not what's going on here."

"I can't, Dean." He got up, grabbed his jacket and his gun and tucked it in his belt. Not good, dammit, not good at all. "I can't just keep going and not go right to them."

"Listen," I placed my hand on his shoulder. How the hell was I going to calm Sam down when I could feel the heat building up in me. "Sam, listen to me, they're gonna be okay, Cas is going to get to them."

"He can't even feel them, Dean!"

Okay, maybe a little bit of a freak out was understandable. I backed off, thoughts running everywhere in my head.

"So, what do ya wanna do? Run up there unarmed, not have everything we need to take care of this bitch? Risk them further?" Wait, why was I talking him down? "Sam, we gotta think smart on this one, okay, have some sort of plan. Cas," I stopped, because that was just a bad example, "Cas has this, he's gonna go in and keep them safe until we get there, and we will get there." I could still see that fury brewing in his eyes, that hazel color turning dark and I placed my hand on his neck, letting the contact sooth him. "Work with me here, Sammy, you're not the only one about to lose it."

After a moment, the tension in him relaxed. "Okay."

Two hours, that's how long I had on the road, with him concentrating on anything else but the shit that was going on in his head. We had stopped for gas, junk, coffee, you know, the normal stuff and we were off. Emerald Creek was almost fifteen hours north and the two of us were doing our best to hold it together… It didn't last as long as I hoped.

"Dean," and I knew he was fighting with himself, just by that tone of voice.

"Yeah, Sammy." Looking over at him, you could just see it in his eyes, so many questions, probably none that I had the answers to. "S'up?

"What's going on between you and Jai?" And there it was. I sucked my lower lip through my teeth, making a noise that I was sure as shit irritated the hell out of him before I sighed. Not bad, we had gone a week without the question. "I mean, that night, she seemed… but then the next…"

I raised a hand, letting out a sigh, "okay, don't hurt yourself." I waited until I was set in the flow of traffic on a smooth, straight stretch of road before I glanced over at him. That war was tearing him apart. "Man, you gotta say something if you have questions, not sit there for a week holding it in. This is Jai we're talking about, she does some crazy shit all the time, and I know we don't do the whole let's share our feelings, but…"

"So, tell me now." His head snapped in my direction and he shifted in the seat. "Tell me why she called you, instead of me, why she always calls you when things like this go down."

"Don't tell her I told you this," I laughed a little because the feelings were deep. "Dude, she loves you, even if she's never going to say those words out loud, and she's just gonna piss you off everyday that you're together, and do stupid things to try and push you away, she loves you. And again, don't tell her I told you that because I don't want to have to smother you in your sleep."

"That doesn't explain why she did what she did." Sam huffed.

"Because, she was scared," I ran my hand down my face. Being one of the ones in the middle of those two was exhausting but I couldn't leave either on their own. "What she did, she was terrified that if you found out, you'd judge her and she'd lose you. Trust me when I say, you are probably the best thing to ever happen to her and she doesn't know how to deal, especially with her inner demons."

"We all have inner demons, Dean."

"That come out to play? That have tea parties that rip demons and spirits apart, and it's not like she can stop, not really. I've watched her try. She gets better, and then something happens and it gets worse again." I stopped, thought back and sighed, "that night, it just took over."

"I know, I was listening." This didn't shock me, but it did quiet my argument.

It was the middle of the night. Sam and I were somewhere near Poplar Bluff, Missouri picking up some random shit that was on the list when the phone rang, well, more like started playing. Jai's ringtone was the opening piano for Tiny Dancer, for obvious reasons, but it was my phone and not Sam's, which had red flag written all over it.

Sam turned over, half-dazed but curious as I stared at it, glancing up at him and he nodded. I pulled the phone towards me, hit the accept and instantly heard the fear.

"Dean?" I sat up in bed, hit the speaker button and waited, trying to figure out what to say. Her voice was shaky, word slurred just a bit, and I knew she was drunk as fuck.

"Hey, Jai, it's the middle of the night here, what are you doing up?" I tried to sound irritated, maybe throw her off to how worried I was but I couldn't. "Where's Gwen?"

"Hotel." She hiccuped, and then moaned, like it hurt. "She's gonna hate me. Sam… Sam's going to hate me. Don't… don't tell him I called."

I looked up at Sam, watched him shift, ready to say something, but I reached over and put my hand over his mouth, just enough to get him to keep it shut before he slapped it away. I begged him, just with my eyes, to stay silent and he did, which was surprising.

"It's just you and me, Sweetheart." I lied, eyes still locked on Sam's, "tell me what's going on. You know neither one is going to hate you."

"You don't know that." She was frightened, and oddly enough, I don't remember her ever being scared of anything, not since we were kids. "I think he's dead, Dean."

"Who?" I sighed, because this wasn't good. Sam sat up more, but still said nothing as I ask, "who's dead, Jai?"

"I couldn't sleep, Gwen ass-deep in this search, but I couldn't sleep, so, I went to the bar… went looking for…" she stopped.

"Needed a little action?" I asked, smiling, and I didn't ask to be a dick because I knew the answer. Sam's eyes went wide, like he was getting ready to hear the worst thing in the world.

"What? No, never," she growled, and it was cute when she was inebriated. "I kinda have this thing for your brother, you asshole."

Sam's body seemed to deflate when those words echoed over the line. Like I said, knew it all along, just like I knew that Sam wasn't getting any off the books either, he had too much of a stick up his ass lately to not notice he wasn't getting laid.

"So, you're a saint."

"Yeah, patron saint of fuck off, Dean!" The fear in her voice was slowly fading.

"Tell me who you think is dead?"

The line was silent for a moment before I heard her take a shaky breath in. "It was just a house, shouldn't have caught my attention, shouldn't have even been there, but I saw it, and the pull was just too much. It's been building, Dean, so hard to resist."

"A demon?" I kept my voice low, calm, wanting her to continue, but I knew if I blew up, she'd freeze.

"Spirit," her words started to sound lazy, like she was finally relaxing, and that made me worry.

"Jai, where are you?" I questioned, and Sam's eyes went wide, like we both had the same thought.

"Hmm?" She exhaled, and then cleared her throat.

"Jai, where are you? Are you safe?" I watched Sam sit up, clench his fist, try with everything not to say a word.

"Oh, yeah, sitting in the Xterra outside the room. I'm fine," the sigh in her voice was either her being irritated or relieved, "I'm fine." there was a small pause before she continued and I thought she might have fallen asleep. "Dean," the fear was back, "Dean, I didn't wait for it to be out of him."

"What did you do?" Light, trying to be soothing, but I could almost picture it, like the blade was back in my hand, like I was back in hell slicing up souls.

"The human body isn't made to take that kind of pain, Dean," she stated matter-of-factly, and I remembered Bobby saying it to her once, in fact, her tone almost mirrored his without the obvious idjit at the end.

"You sliced into him?" The bile rose up in the back of my throat even though I was sure I knew just what she meant when she said he's dead, Dean. "Why? Why would you do that?" The line was silent. Maybe she had hung up, maybe she had fallen asleep. "Jai?" I could still hear breathing on the line, "Jai, why did you do that?"

She scoffed, a downright dirty scoff that told me to fuck off before she answered, "he pissed me off. He said things. Maybe he wasn't a spirit, maybe he was… something else, but he just… he got under my skin, and the fire…"

I knew what she meant, that dangerous feeling of just needing to slice. It had been years for me, so many years, and I had Cas to help keep it under control, I had Sam, but she just had her secrets, her little ways of doing it to relieve the pressure under her skin.

"Was he alive when you left?" It was the only thing I could think of because she hadn't said she knew he was dead, just that she wasn't sure.

"That's the problem," she sighed, angry like I wasn't really getting it, "I don't know. I don't remember. After the first slice, I don't remember a thing. It's all… blurry, with black edges."

"Go in," I closed my eyes, hoping she wouldn't argue. It didn't work.

"Dean, I'm covered in some dead guy's blood. I can't just walk in there." But, she was tired, I could hear it, and just a tad bit tipsy.

"Doesn't matter, she's not going to question," I squeezed my eyes tight, praying I was right, but the sound of Sam's fingers typing out a text gave me some relief. "Listen, Angel," and I could feel Sam's eyes on me. She didn't need my snarky comebacks, or my wrath, even if I wanted to hand her her own ass. She called for a reason, because she was scared, because she needed… something. "Go inside. Sleep it off, have a greasy breakfast," she moaned sickly at the thought of that, which made me smile, "and call me when you're sober."

"Fuck you, Dean," but there was a sigh of relief in her voice, "fuck you."

"No thanks, I'll pass." I huffed and the line went dead. A few silent minutes later, Sam's phone whistled, which had us both looking at it. "So?"

"She's in," Sam exhaled and shook his head, "Gwen said she came in, took a shower, and just fell asleep." I nodded, flopped back on the bed and closed my eyes. "What the hell, Dean?"

"Exactly," and that was the end of that.

Until now.

"What if it happens again?" Sam questioned.

"It will." There was no use lying to him, it would always happen, there would always be an again.

"Dean, that's not funny."

"I'm not trying to be," I shrugged and cleared my throat. "Remember how you were on the demon blood, sneaking off to find Ruby, always wanting a fix, thinking you could beat it?" I glanced at Sam, watched as he looked away, shame in his eyes. The kid really should have gotten over it by now, but Sam was Sam and he was still kicking himself, so I changed directions. "Remember how I was like with the Mark? Always itching, trying to keep it under wraps? Remember…" God, how did I do this? "Remember how angry I was, like, all the time?"

"Yeah, Dean, I remember," Sam sighed. Bet he remembered so much more than that, like the bloodshed, the need to kill, the insatiable need to kill. "But, she's not like that, right? I mean, I've barely even hear of her doing it."

"She has her moments," I sighed, because I had been witness to more than one, and that one little secret that Gwen and I shared would never let me forget the first time I had seen it happen. "Listen, Sam, she's gonna be okay. She's better than us."

"What about Gwen? How does she deal with all of this?"

"One day at a time," I needed to be honest, at least with that much. Sam nodded, at least, that was what I saw out of the corner of my vision and I gave the steering wheel a good squeeze. "You know they're not weak, right?"

"Yeah," his reply was like a curt laugh, "I know that."

"Those girls have been through just as much hell as we have."

His hand ran down his face and he sighed, "what are you getting at?"

"That they'll be okay, and they'll get through this, too." I did look at him this time, and I did see that signature smirk cross his lips before it faded. That was Sam's yeah, sure, and I shook my head. "Don't believe me?"

"Never said that."

"Didn't have to. I'm your brother, remember, I know way too much about you." I tried to make it light but he wasn't having it. "Alright, hair band reject, time to switch the mood. Zeppelin or Seger?"

"Dean, I don't…" he started to argue, before taking a deep breath, "Mellencamp."

"Really? Who are you and what did you do with Sam?" That got a smile with him. "Mellencamp?"

"Need me to find it?" Sam grabbed the box from under the seat and shifted through the old cassettes. He popped a clear cassette in the tape deck and I shook my head as the opening claps of Jack and Diane started up. I smiled as he sat back, fingers resting on his leg as they tapped out the tune, hand slapping against his thigh. "Little diddy 'bout Jack and Diane, two American kids growing up, in the heartland… Jack, he's gonna be a football star…"

"Damn, I might have to tell Jai that you sing," I laughed, the real smile on his lips.

"No," he laughed, "please, don't. I don't think I could keep up." His eyes seemed to fade as he turned to look out the window, lost in the music and the memories. I heard him sigh, something that seemed to take all the fight out of his shoulders, and just like every other time, Sam slowly feel asleep.

There weren't any real points of interest on the drive, the usual bullshit happened. I irritated Sam, called Bobby, stopped for gas and coffee, irritated Sam some more, talked lore and heard John Denver about seventeen times. Sam's obsessive need to piss every few hours was to the point where we were running behind, but that wasn't as bad as how long it felt to get through the damn state. It was seriously worse than Ohio, and Connecticut, just went on forever.

Sam looked out the window as we pulled up to the dirt road, Emerald Creek's Garnet Area was a tourist's favorite nightmare. Seven long miles of dirt road lay before us as I swung the Impala onto the well-worn way and headed off into the woods. We needed a Star Garnet, apparently the only other place you could find it was India, so here we were about to go digging and night was falling soon.

Sam had slept a good six hours of the ride, which wasn't an easy thing since I could tell the nightmares were still plaguing him, but what was I gonna do? We never really talked about it, not with the girls involved because Sam didn't want to own up to being the Boy King again and I sure as shit wasn't going to tell him that Cas was the Overlord of the Damned in mine.

It amazed me that there was no one at the site, of course, who's going to take off with buckets of dirt and hope they get what their looking for afterwards, but the darkness that surrounded the place was creepy. I left the headlights on, put the car in park and the two of us stepped out, surveying the area.

"Dude, it looks like a pet cemetery," Sam whispered, and I could see his profile just enough to see the way he swallowed, like he was terrified.

"Well, good thing we know how to take care of things." I smirked, patting the blade in my pocket. Sam nodded, gave me a fake smile and pulled his cell out. "Where do we start?"

"The problem with the star garnet is you don't know if you have the pattern until after you cut it open." Sam sighed, looking down at the screen that turned his face blue. "So," he shrugged, tucking it away, "I guess we start digging."

He grabbed the closest shovel and passed it over. "YAY!" Moaned with total sarcasm as I pumped my hand like this was the best thing ever and grabbed the shovel.

After an hour of digging, Sam and I moved over to sit and shift through the dirt, and if I ever said I needed this kind of adventure when I was a kid, well, I lied. Looking at some of the strange things that parents do with their children nowadays, I realized that there are a lot of things stranger than handing a kid a shotgun and telling them to aim at werewolves.

This was taking too long. We were still another seven hours out, and I could feel the anxiety creeping up in my chest. Sam, the damn college genius, apparently was now an expert at panning, because he had to have at least two pounds worth of the garnets in his little bucket while I had less than half.

"Hey, can we get a move on?" I snapped, looking around as the creeping feeling of being watched made its way up my spine. I had shed everything but my t-shirt and even that was covered in sweat, sticking to my skin in places and Sam was down to what used to be a white tank. He looked around, nodded at me, placing his shifter down before his eyes caught mine. "What?"

"You okay?"

"Yes…" I pressed my hand to my chest to try and relieve the pressure, "... no, can we just get going?"

"One more stop." Sam grabbed his bucket, dumped mine into it and the two of us headed for the small Gift Shop down by the Impala. I was waiting on his cue, which meant standing around while he disarmed the security system… on a building in the middle of nowhere seven miles down a dirt road, I switched off the headlights, making sure the battery would turn over and that we hadn't killed it, before following him into the shop.

The place was littered with boxed gems, empty containers to hold your finds, stuffed animals and other expensive bullshit stuff you would only pay for if you never intended to be back in the area again. I stopped by a small stuffed moose, one that had a tee-shirt on that said Stewart's Gift Shop, Emerald Creek, ID, and smiled.

Sam was standing by the grinder, pulling out some of the largest stones in the bucket. When the noise of the machine echoed through the empty building, I jumped nearly a foot, expecting it but not at the same time. I picked the moose up and walked over to watch him, just as he pulled those stupid shop goggles over his eyes.

"Hey, Sammy, remember that year, when you were five that I started grabbing souvenirs for you?" I smiled, looking down at the moose. Sam smiled, eyed it over and nodded.

"Yeah, you took a stuffed animal from every town we worked a case in. Dad was pissed when there wasn't any room on the back floor for the cooler." He answered, shaking his head as he went back to the task of cutting each gem in half to look for the pattern. "What are you gonna do with that one?"

"Was thinking of putting it on the back deck. Kinda cute, don'cha think?" I laughed and watched him shake his head.

"Put it away, Dean."

I shrugged, moved back to the shelf and looked down at one of the boxed gems. It was perfect. The right color, just a slight shade of red mixed into the swirl of purple. It was just a rock, nothing special but it reminded me of Gwen in such a strange way. With a glance at Sam, hoping to God he wasn't looking, I picked up the box, took a deep breath and slipped it into my pocket.

It was a favor to the tourist community, that little box was almost forty bucks.

It felt like forever, pacing around Sam while he went through the stones but each time he handed me one, it felt like a victory, like we were one step closer to beating this bitch. Finally, after moving from one spot on the floor to another, placing each stone's half on the scale, we hit our mark.

3.14 ounces, and each one of them a Star Garnet.

With a deep breath, I grabbed a bag, shifted them in and nodded. Sam flipped off the grinder, wiped everything down and out the door we went, leaving the bucket of stones out by the side of the building. Nothing had our prints on it, even the shifters and the shovels had been wiped, but it didn't hurt to do a once over with the alarm and the door handle, before the two of us were in the car and off, kicking up rocks on our way down that road.

Sweaty, smelly, and just plain disgusting, we waited until we were a good ways out before we found a truck stop somewhere on Route 26. Taking quick turns in the showers that the truck stop provided, and grabbing a quick, greasy breakfast to go, the two of us switched places and got back on the road.

Curled up in the passenger's seat, head against the cool glass of my Baby, I let my eyes close, drift into the darkness and hoped to get some sort of sleep before the whole world crashed down in seven and a half hours.

Chapter Thirty-One

Jai

Sweat poured off my skin, and the air that I breathed in was filled with a moist heat that I was pretty sure wasn't supposed to be there. My eyes blinked open, expecting to see nothing but the gray color of the cell around me but it was black, black and red and the color of fire which made my heart race.

I wasn't even laying down, I was standing back against a wall, my fingers tacky with the feeling of dried blood, something that coated my skin and the knife that was held tightly in my hand. The darkness that surrounded whatever room I was in seemed to close in on both sides, making the illuminated space smaller.

I wanted to close my eyes, wanted to somehow fade out of the nightmare I was stuck in, but I couldn't, I was locked onto the movement of the shadow that hid within the blackness before me. Shifting so that I was more at the ready, I let my fingers twirl the blade before I narrowed my eyes.

He stepped out, that saunter so familiar that I would know it anywhere. Dark blue jeans hugged his legs, a black tee tightened across his chest and the white and black flannel was speckled with dark blood. His hands clenched at his side, looking over me as he approached, and then, as the smile curved up on his lips, his hands relaxed.

"Well, look at you," the sarcastic tone in his voice was something I was quite familiar with, but there was just something a little deeper in this one, especially with the way he looked me over. I watched Dean stop, cross one arm just below his chest, the other leaning against it so that he could rub his fingers over his lips. "I knew you had it in you."

"Get the fuck away from me," I snapped, because this was not my Dean.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" He sighed, there wasn't an ounce of humor in his voice. "For me to leave you alone, for Sammy just to forget you so that you can go on playing with filth, for Gwen to ditch you because you're so broken," his voice took on a whiny tone with that last word, "got news for you, Jai, we're all broken. We're all in our own little hell." He stepped closer, which made me instinctively step back, survey the area for the best way around him without giving up the advantage, but I wasn't going to let him see that I could feel the vibration in the air. "But, that's the difference, isn't it? You're not really in hell, not like the rest of us. It doesn't haunt you, does it? In fact," he stopped close enough that I had to look up at him, "you like it."

"Go to hell, Dean!" I snapped, but that just brought him right to me, his hand fisted in my shirt as he dragged me right to his chest.

"Go to hell, Dean," he mocked and smiled down at me, eyes turning that murky black, "you don't fool me, Lancing, you never have." I could have taken that blade and just run him through, but my body refused to move. I tried to steady my breathing, but it only came out as wrecked, shuddering releases. "What? Not strong enough to play with me? Don't wanna hurt your precious Dean? Come on, Lancing," he brought his hand up and ran it over my sticky hair, "why don't we have a little tea party of our own? Huh? Just you, me," that hand came down, fingers wrapped around my wrist and he brought my own blade up to my neck, closing the space between us, "and your hell blade."

"Let go," I clenched my teeth, wanting nothing more than to be away from the mocking presence of the demon, "Dean would never do this, he's never try to bring it out."

"Haven't you figured it out?" The demon before me smile, cruelly, "your Dean isn't here anymore, and after today, the only thing you'll be left with," the edge of the knife flicked against my skin, drawing blood as I hissed at the feel of it slicing my skin. He brought the blade up to his lips, reached out with the tip of his tongue and ran it along the edge, "is me."

A blinding golden light filled the room. Warmth and safety cascaded over me as I held my eyes tightly closed, and the tackiness on my skin seemed to melt away. Slowly, the light died away, and I found myself in a small, tan colored, hotel room. None of the God-awful wallpaper, nothing goudy or offensive, but plain, with light browns and soft greens, all that fit within the palette.

He sat on the edge of the dresser, maybe sat wasn't the right word, with one leg up enough to rest his elbow on, and the other straight, but he was resting on it, smiling at me as he looked me over. I hadn't moved from where I stood, three feet from the door, not until he brought that leg down and stood.

Was it him? Was it really him, in one piece, whole and present?

"Gabe?" I whispered, unsure as the smile became more like a grin.

"Hello, Sugar Pop," his voice was soft, full of affection, and I shivered at the nickname. "What are you doing roaming around in a hellscape?"

"I," my voice faltered and I shook my head, "I don't know." I narrowed my eyes at him, rubbed my hand across my forehead and then placed both on my hips. "I don't even know how I got wherever the hell here is."

"I brought you here," he whispered.

"Why?" and that question made me think of Sam. God, how I missed him. "Gabe," I stepped closer to him, reached out and let my fingers brush over the soft stubble on his jaw. Were angels supposed to shave? "Are you still in Heaven? Are you still hurt?"

"Whoa, whoa," his hands came up to rest on my shoulders, "listen, Angel Cake, you don't need to worry about me, I'm fine, but you do need to wake up, because something bad is coming and even with Cas and Gwen at your side, right now, you need to do something besides dream about me."

"You pulled me here, I was dreaming about…" I stopped before I could finish the sentence, but the curve of his lip told me that he would tease me forever if I didn't, "Dean." I cleared my throat, "I was dreaming about Dean and he was a demon."

"He goes that way sometimes." Gabe winked, "nothing my brother and Gwen can't take care of, but you need to know that wasn't him, that was something trying to get in."

"It did," I whispered, nodding slightly, "it got in, and it said the right things, and I don't know if I can resist it."

"You learned what you did for a reason, Jai." He snapped, and when he actually used my name, this brought my eyes straight to his, those honey gold and green eyes locked on mine as he tilted his head curiously to the side, "I know it all, remember? I know why you did it, I know how long it took, I know how hard it was to rip you back, but you did it for a reason, and it sure as hell wasn't for Dean fucking Winchester, so you let that asshole take care of himself."

"Wow," I smiled, shyly, "possessive much?"

"You're damn right!" He growled at that and while it was cute, I could feel his power spike as the blue in his eyes got brighter. "And it wasn't for Sam either."

"I know." I whispered, nodding, "I know, Gabe."

"Then, what are you still doing here?"

And, with those last words, I was suddenly sitting up on the bench in the cold concrete sell, gasping for air, even the chilled, stale, musty stuff that surrounded us. With a look around, I found Cas moving closer to his bars and Gwen eyeing me over like something was wrong but that was when it happened.

I closed my eyes tightly as the pain bombarded my temples, the images behind them seemed to blind me behind my eyelids and I pressed palm of my hand hard against my eyes.

"Jai?" Cas' deep voice resonated through my head, like someone had turned up the bass too high on the speakers in a small car. I held up a finger, hoping it would silence him until the pain dulled. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," I whispered, even as it came out soft and unsure, but I blinked at him and nodded again. "I'm fine." Not that you could tell the time of day in the… wherever the hell we were, but there was something different in the air. "How long was I out?"

"Not long at all," Gwen replied and crossed her arms over her chest. Her head tilted down, her eyes scanned the floor and I knew she was thinking. There were just tells that she had, but it wasn't just random thoughts, she was digging deep for something specific. "You were dreaming about it again, weren't you?"

"Never stopped," I sighed and leaned down, placing my elbows on my knees. "Dean this time." And, her pacing stopped, only for a beat before she picked it back up again, "Demon Dean."

"What's going on?" Cas questioned, a little lost, but that was when Gwen stepped up to the bars.

"What did you see?" The question could have meant a thousand things but I just shook my head since the specifics of it wasn't as clear as I wanted. "The pain, what did you see?"

"Gwen?" Cas was confused, looking for some clarity but I licked my lips, slid closer to the edge of the bench and shook my head.

"Nothing that could be close to useful, nothing…" I stopped spotted a small piece of rock in the corner and slowly moved to pick it up. Taking a deep breath, I slipped around behind the bench and scrapped it against the wall. Well, Son of a Bitch! It was like writing with chalk. "Symbols, sigils, words." I whispered in a reply to her, but it was low and my back was turned as my hand moved over the damp wall, sketching out the images in my head. "Not sure what it all means."

"Maybe you shouldn't do that." Cas warned but there was no stopping it now. "Gwen," there was a bit of concern in his voice, when he turned to her. "This isn't the best idea."

"It might be the only one we have." I turned to look at her, because Cas was right, but she knew how the visions went, how the writing on the wall wasn't my own but something… angelic. "Tell me about your dream."

"No," I snapped, lowered my gaze and then looked away, "sorry."

"That bad?"

"Can't we just concentrate on getting the hell out of here?" I sighed and went back to etching the symbols into the walls. There was silence for a few hours, the only noise was the drip of the water and the sound of rock against rock.

I heard the shifting of feet, and boots. Whoever the hell it was that had us hostage didn't wear boots, but I knew those two sets on the ground, they always had the same rhythm, and I looked up from where I sat, curled up in the corner of the cell, furthest away from everyone. While it looked like I was cowering there, that was far from it, the piece of stone was still in my hand and the walls and floor were now covered in everything that I had seen.

The sound of metal against the bars had me twirling in my spot as I saw the long beaked nose of the plague doctor's mask through the bars closest to me. The green eyes behind it blinked, going over the strange writing that I had spent hours on, and in a faded thought I wondered how long it had been since I had woken up.

I stood slowly, the vision clearing from the black eye I had gotten as I stepped a little closer, hearing Gwen's protest whispering to me. I stopped at the end of that beak, blinked in the color of those eyes and reached out slowly, but the distinct sound of Sam losing his breath had me turning, moving towards the corner once again, they were only going to force me there when they opened the cage.

The light in the room brightened as two more masked figures entered carrying torches and all three of us shielded our eyes at the sight, until Sam and Dean, shackled and barely conscious, were dragged into the room, dropped into the cell next to me and locked in. I turned to look at the green-eyed doctor, who was still staring at me, before I crawled over to the bars and knelt there, looking at the side of Sam's face.

The four of our captors checked on Gwen and Cas, making threatening gestures with the torches in their hands, but Gwen stood strong, not afraid of the fire, and Cas merely rolled his eyes before they disappeared back down the hall. I turned to the last, the one who still watched me, locking eyes with him, or her, before he, or she, huffed and followed down the hall, leaving us in the barely there light of the cells once again.

"Sam?" I whispered, reaching through the bars.

"Dean?" Cas' deep voice vibrated through the room, "Sam," and, in that instance, I knew the angel was reaching out for them with his grace as well, but he was just as locked down as the rest of us. "Jai, can you see anything?"

"Well, their breathing." I replied, sarcastically and smiled as he huffed, but other than that, I couldn't see any other movement. Sam lay on his back, the rest of his body seemed to have just dropped haphazardly wherever his loose limbs went, and Dean was behind him, curled up on his side, but I could see the rise and fall of his ribs. "It took you awhile to wake up from the powder too, so maybe, we just wait."

"How did this happen?" Gwen sighed, and I looked over as she pressed against the bars, trying to get a better view of the two of them from across the way. "We were supposed to have a better plan than this."

"We have a plan," I looked up at her, watched her narrow her eyes at me as the smile crept up on my face. I backed away from the bars, turned my back to the stone wall, and brought my knees up, resting my arms on them as she shook her head. "The plan is not to die, remember, how we get there doesn't matter. We knew we would be here no matter what we did."

"You knew." Gwen snapped and clenched her fists, the anger growing in her and I nodded.

"Yeah, I knew, but so did you." I placed my head back, drew in a deep breath and waited for her to catch on. She stopped, stared at me and shook her head. "Come on, G, that wasn't just a dream and you weren't just a bystander, you knew. I knew, hell, Feathers over there probably knew too, but, it doesn't matter because we're here and no matter what we did differently, we would always be here."

"What are you talking about?" Cas questioned, his voice demanding and I smiled, eyes locked with Gwen's

"A dream," she replied after a long moment of silence, "months ago, no… years, before we met, there was a dream…"

I closed my eyes as her voice took over, let my thoughts travel back to that morning.

I sat up in bed, sweat pouring down my face as I flipped the comforter off, trying to get some sort of air in the stale motel room somewhere between Springfield, Missouri and Rogers, Arkansas. I pushed my hair from my face, grabbed the flannel from the empty space beside me and slipped it on before making my way towards the door.

It was spring, about fifty-five degrees outside and windy, but sweat-drenched and exhausted, only having gone to bed three hours before, I didn't care that I was only in a tank, boxer briefs, and that open flannel as I swung the door open and let the morning air in.

The small, four-cup coffee maker was up and bubbling within moments and as I sat on the edge of the bed, going over the small lacerations on my arms with a sterile wipe, I drew in a deep breath, filling my lungs with the scent of clean air and coffee trying to blink away the remainder of the dream, until my cell rang.

Shaking me out of the daze, I stood, made my way over to the table where I had tossed it the night before and swiped my finger across the screen, one still tacky with blood. I rolled my eyes as I hit the speaker button and slumped down in the chair, closer to the coffee maker.

With it gurgling and almost complete, I let my head fall back on the seat, used the second as a footrest and sighed.

"Mornin'," I mumbled, not expecting a nice reply.

"I'm sorry I woke you," and, that had me sitting up a little more.

"You didn't," was the only thing I could reply without going into major details.

"I didn't? How could I have not woke you? Seriously, Jai, you got in not more than four hours ago, you should be dead to the world." Gwen snapped and I could hear the frustration in her voice. She could be like a mom sometimes, irritated when I don't eat, don't sleep, keep myself on the road for hours, but this was a different sort of snap.

"What's going on?" I responded.

"It's going to sound out of character," and I snorted because this whole conversation started with I'm sorry and THAT was out of character. "I had a dream."

"Oh, yeah?" I sat up and reached for the coffee, poured it into one of those small paper cups and then fished through the bag beside my chair for the creamer I always brought with me. Don't judge, I have a specific way I travel, but this seemed like it was going to be a long morning and black coffee just wasn't going to do. "Funny that you mention it, I had one too."

"Did it involve three guys?" I paused, holding the creamer just above the cup and blinked, not that she could see me but I needed a minute before I swallowed and cleared my throat. Did I tell her it involved Dean Winchester, or did I leave it at that. "I'll take that as a yes." For a moment, I tried to catch my breath before I continued on with what I was doing. "Are you alright?"

"Wraiths can be a bitch to deal with alone, G, but nothing I can't handle." I replied, stirring the coffee before I sat back in the chair again. "Tell me about your dream."

"It was stupid," she whispered, which was odd because I knew she was either three pillows deep in bed still or sitting at her desk with no one around, so why the lowered voice. I rubbed my eyes harshly, trying to get rid of the crust before I took a sip of the hot liquid. "We were in a cave," and that had my attention, "caged in like animals, a blue-eyed man in the cell beside me, two more in the one beside you, but there was writing on the wall in your cell."

"Why cells?" Not that I didn't know the answer to it, but if I questioned, maybe she would keep going. "Why were we caught?"

"Jai, this isn't a good thing," the fact that she wasn't using her stoic, know-it-all voice on me, something she did every single time we were working a case, that had me worried. She was never emotional, never one to just let things be… normal. "This is very, very bad. Whatever was going on, it felt like the end."

"The end?" I snorted, "the end of what?"

The pause on the line was disconcerting, and I swallowed, waiting on the response. "Everything."

That was a tough phone call. I felt like I was a million miles away from her and there was nothing I could do. She never put much stock in dreams, never one for giving into the strange notion that things happened for a reason, but there she was, telling me every detail of the thing that I had seen in my own head. Something that had woken me from a restless sleep covered in sweat, but the problem wasn't that she was telling me my own nightmare, it was that the ending was so much different than the one that I had seen with my own subconscious.

"I have to tell you something," I sighed, pouring the first cup of the second pot of coffee slowly into the empty cup as I rubbed my forehead. Setting the pot back on the burner, I stood and closed the door, the slices from the wraith now starting to burn, which prompted me to pull out the first aid kit. There was silence on the line. "I saw it too."

"What?" She questioned, low and unsure.

Sighing, I sat down once again, unzipped the kit and fished through for the antiseptic. Bobby had made sure I had something with a numbing agent in it and these slices weren't bad enough for stitches, or butterflies, so I wasn't wasting bandages on them either.

I cleared my throat and grabbed the cup. "Gwen, one of those guys, that was Dean."

"Dean? Dean who?"

"My Dean," I whispered, but rolled my eyes. "The one I grew up with."

"I don't understand."

"You and me both." I felt my eyes drooping despite the five cups of the motel coffee that I had downed. "I don't get why we're dreaming the same thing, I don't understand why it feels so final, and I sure as hell don't get why we're teaming up with the douche, because he wasn't there by chance."

"Get some sleep, head back this way, and we'll figure it out." At least the worry in her voice was gone, didn't really explain anything but I knew one thing after this. Something big was going down and we were going to be smackdab in the middle of it. "Jai?"

"Yeah?" I sat up again, flicked the machine off and rolled my shoulders, trying to release the tension as I locked the door and made my way over to the bed. I stripped off the flannel and flopped face first into the pillow as I let the phone land beside me.

"Sleep." She didn't have to tell me twice. "Text when you wake up."

"Okay, MOM." I growled the best I could with my face smushed into the fabric. "Talk soon."

And, I hung up.

The dreams didn't stay away though. Before I knew it, I was elbow deep in blood and gore, screams of the dying and tortured filled my ears and the one man that I thought I had managed to stay away from, who followed me no matter where life took me, was staring down at me with black eyes and that Goddamned smug smile on his face.

I shook myself from the daze, felt the callous fingertips run over my cheek and blinked sensitive eyes open to turn and look at Sam, who was pressed against the bars, reaching in as far as he could to touch any part of me he could reach. I moved, shifted to my side and got to my knees, framing his face with my hands as I brought his lips to mine, hindered only a little by the bars.

My heart raced as I kissed him, breathing only slightly elevated, but the fact that I was aware of these small things made me realize how much my body was locked into fight mode. Accessing myself was one thing, noting how warm his skin was, the sticky feel of fresh blood along his hairline, was something different.

I pulled back from him, releasing a shaky breath, not sure on wanting to admit the feelings of terror that had been flowing through me at the thought of the two of them somewhere harmed or dying but as I rested my forehead against his, the only sound that came out was definitely filled with relief.

"Sam," I sighed, felt his fingers run through my hair and closed my eyes tightly, letting his lips smooth over my skin, completely forgetting the fact that it was still swollen and split in some places, before I opened my eyes and backed away. "Are you alright?"

"Should be asking you the same thing," he whispered, thumb going over the edge of the bruise on my cheek. "I hope you kicked their ass."

"Not sure which one of us was left standing, but I'm pretty sure that's why Gwen and I aren't sharing a cell." I laughed, leaning into his touch more, at least for a moment in order to draw in his heat. "Sam," his name was on my lips again before I pulled back and sighed. "I'm not sure we're gonna…"

"Hey," he smiled, cupping my jaw to bring my eyes to his, "none of that. We're going to make it out." He waited for me to nod, but that wasn't what I was going with, wasn't what I was going to say. I slowly backed away, scooted out of his touch and looked up at the wall. Sam realized what I was doing, sat up straight and slowly rose to his feet as his eyes scanned it over. "Jesus."

"What?" Dean's voice shook me, deep and torn, as if he had screamed forever, and when he made it to the bars beside his brother, those green eyes locked on mine. "Jai?"

"Dean," his name was like a hitch in my throat, but I didn't move towards him and he didn't reach out for me, but we both followed Sam's gaze to the wall.

"It's Enochian," Cas spoke very softly, almost so none of us heard him. "But the sigils are…"

"Reversed." Dean finished, and I watched him clench his fists. "What is this?"

"A dream," I answered and stepped back, sitting down on the bench so my eyes could roam over every inch of the wall. Dean's eyes were instantly on mine. "I don't have a reason for it."

"And you thought that it would be the best idea ever to actually spell out what was in a dream?" Dean snapped. I turned and looked at Gwen, raising my brow at her, as if to say, hello, control your man, please, but Gwen was staring at him with disbelief as well.

"I'm sorry that I didn't wait until you were here so that you could critic everything I do, Dean!" I snapped and felt the anger rise in me. What a pompous dick! "You know we've been doing this forever right, the two of us? Hunting isn't a new thing for me, and I'm pretty sure I know what the hell is going on."

"Sure, you're right," he replied narrowing his eyes, "you've done a bang up job, you know with Hell, and angels and, oh, I don't know, dragging your partner into the bullshit you call life."

"Fuck you, Winchester!" I spat at him, clenching my fists as the anger only grew.

"Dean," Sam whispered, patting his brother's arm to get his attention.

"You know what…" Dean started but Sam grabbing him by the shirt had him refocus off from me and onto Sam. "WHAT?"

"I know this." Sam replied, tugging on Dean, who reluctantly took his eyes from me before crowding up behind Sam.

"You know what?" Same three words, different meaning, different tone, and I rolled my eyes and turned my back on them, stepping up to the bars to look at Gwen.

"This," Sam swallowed hard enough that I could hear him. "This is what Balthazar wrote on the…" the pause in his voice had both me and Gwen looking curiously at him. Sam dug a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and waved them lightly at Dean, who snatched them out of his hand before tucking them in his coat pocket. "Dean, it's the same. The Enochian, the script," I turned and leaned on the bars as his hazel eyes came to land on me, "how did you know?"

"Same way you did, I guess," I shrugged and let my eyes roll up to look at the ceiling but I didn't say it out loud, just let that frown flit across his lips. "Looks like we have some higher help after all."

Dean shook his head, sighed in a rather irritated huff and turned back to Sam, even as I smiled. "Okay, Sammy, tell me what the hell you're going on about before I figure out how to strangle that one through the bars."

Sam glanced at me, then Cas and Gwen, before he shifted in place and raised his brows. "Balthazar, he told me how to save our lives."

Chapter Thirty-two

Sam

After setting off, not long after leaving the garnet mine, we were back on the road. It was dark, quiet and Dean was having nightmares, I could tell by the way he shifted, by the way his forehead creased, by the low whine he gave out before he mumbled someone's name. Dean was having nightmares, and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

I had my own, of course, visions of Jai taking people apart as I stood, high up on the ever growing mountain of bodies, her eyes pitch black, her skin covered in blood, but there was a cruel smile on her face. Dean was tied to a rack, begging, pleading for me to stop, to listen to him, but Jai would just step over and slice him again. It never ended and rarely was there a night, or a time, that I could close my eyes and sleep without seeing the blood and gore.

I was sure that Dean knew about them, about mine anyway, but there was also a part of me that thought Dean was convinced I wasn't seeing his, that somehow I was immune to the small sighs and whines that came from him in the middle of the night. Not that it mattered, like I said, I couldn't do a damn thing about it and what was the point of making him close off again.

I glanced over at Dean again as he made a grunting noise, either from being hit in his dream or swinging but his body never moved. I wish this was over, I wish… I wish I could take Jai and Gwen and just go somewhere that no one, nothing knew that we hunted, that we could be invisible but that wasn't going to happen.

It was so frustrating to know that they were trapped, that God only knew where Cas was. It had been hours since we heard from him, since he disappeared and part of me was glad that we put that tracker on his phone. I was getting annoyed, driving with only the sound of Dean's soft snoring.

At the next gas station, I pulled the Impala up to the front door. Dean didn't even shift, but I knew if I was too long, he would get out and come looking. I needed coffee, needed to piss, and needed away from the noise of his nightmares more than anything.

Stepping into the store, there was nothing there that would have given the indication that anything was wrong. The guy behind the counter barely looked up as he flipped through the skin mag without hesitation, there was no one else in the store, and the television was set on some God-awful news station that was playing the greatest hits of every major disaster that had hit the US in the last fifteen years, funny how they all seemed to land on today.

I walked into the bathroom, shut and locked the door, closed my eyes and did what I had to do. It was all routine, washed my hands, stashed my gun, and walked out. And then, routine stopped. The lights flickered and grew brighter, the station on the television turned to static, and bulbs burst from their sockets as the white noise grew louder. The man behind the counter never moved, like he was frozen in time.

I brought a hand up to shield my eyes, pulled the gun from the back of my belt and cocked it, waiting, but as I stood there, eyes tightly shut, everything went silent. I listened to the lack of noise, to the way the light became steady, and slowly lowered my arm, bringing the gun up, but when I opened and focused, the only thing I saw was him.

Balthazar stood in front of me, hands folded together in front of him, brow cocked like he thought he was the baddest thing I had ever seen but he narrowed his eyes, gave a little tilt to his head and his eyes ran over me like I was a piece of met.

"Sam Winchester." His voice was smug with that accent of his, something between British and not, but there was a smile on his face.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned, looking around, waiting for others. "Where's Cas?"

"If he's not with you, than my guess would be stuck with your girls." he shrugged and moved closer. I raised the gun up, not sure if he was friend or foe. "Oh, put the gun away, Samuel, I've seen you in less and I have to say, except for the other weapon your packing, there's not a single thing on you that scares me."

"What?" That had me a little thrown off and I lowered the gun, which got the side of his lips to perk up. "What are you talking about?"

"So, Cassie didn't tell you?"

"About you watching over us?" I huffed, "yeah, he told us, you fucking perv."

"Oh, come now, Sam, you're something to be admired, not hidden away behind those… layers."

The smug, little, son of a bitch! I raised the gun, ready to shoot him on principle. Balthazar brought his hands up and I watched his eyes run over me again. "Cut that out!"

"Cassie and I are close, you know, not that it matters, but if it wasn't for him, I would have just gone off and done my own thing," he started to move around, circle me as he picked at the boxes and cans on the shelves. "As it was, I knew he was going to get caught, and I can't let my little brother die because he's too involved with a couple of humans."

"What do you want, Balthazar?" I uncocked the gun and tucked it away, because this was going to get me nowhere and the bullets wouldn't do anything to him anyway.

He stopped beside me, reached into his jacket and pulled out a green box. It was an old pack of cigarettes, a brand that wasn't made anymore, something that I remembered seeing at Bobby's the first time Dad brought us there. I reached out to pluck it from his hand as he offered it to me, but he pulled back at the last moment.

"Gentle, you beast," he said with a slightly sexual tone and I took a deep breath. I wasn't playing this game, and held out my palm so that he could place the box in it. "This is called a gift, Sam Winchester."

"What is it?" I asked calmly, waited for his hand to move and slowly maneuvered so that I could open it. Inside were what looked like the top of ten cigarettes but when I pulled them up, I could see right through the glass containers. Confused, I glanced between them all, as they spilled out carefully into my palm, and Balth's amused eyes. "I don't…"

"Of course, you don't," he sighed, "you're too pretty to be smart." I bit my tongue against his insult but waited for him to continue. "This is the answer to all of your problems."

"The spell," I whispered when it all made sense. "But, Dean and I…"

"Silly boy, angels don't need things like shovels or grinders to find star stones." God, this one was worse than Crowley and his flirtations. "Look, Sam, I'm not going to pussyfoot around it any longer. This is what you need to banish the evil, to get Cas, Jai, and Gwen back to safety, all you have to do, you and your brother that is, is read the incantation in the box, do what it tells you to do, and don't fuck it up."

"Why are you helping us?" Not that it wasn't clear but really, there had to be something else driving him.

"Pretty, but dumb," Balthazar sighed. "You two morons are the last hope for the rest of us. Those girls have a destiny that needs to be fulfilled, and you and your dimwit of a brother are the only two that can help make that come to light. The world needs people like Lancing and Bancroft, it needs people like the Winchesters," Balthazar turned and moved towards the door, "a little bit of wrath from an archangel never hurt the motivation a little either." He glanced at me, hand on the door, looked me over once more and pushed the door open. "Ta-ta, Sam, don't screw up."

And then he was gone.

The sound of the woman's voice from the television suddenly filled the room as she talked about earthquakes, the lights were back to normal, and I tucked the pack away just as the guy behind the counters looked up and cleared his throat.

"You gonna buy anything, buddy, or just stand there?" His question prompted me to head towards the coffee station, not that I wanted something that was probably four hours old, but after what had just happened, anything was good, and would have been better with a shot of Jack.

I grabbed two coffees, paid, and was out the door a second later, sliding in behind the wheel just as Dean blinked awake.

"Dude?" Dean's voice cracked as he looked over me, a little confused. "When the hell did we stop?"

I paused for a moment, stared out the windshield before I turned and handed him the coffee, just a little bit too rough. He jumped back, trying to make sure it didn't spill on him. "I have to tell you about what just happened."

"Okay?" He sat up in the seat, grabbed his phone, like he was looking for a message. It was the first thing he did every time. I watched the look of realization cross his face and the phone came down hard across the seat. "Son of a Bitch!"

"It's okay, Dean," I whispered, as much of a reassurance as I could give him, "we're almost there." I cranked the car over, backed out from the spot and headed out onto the main road again, just before reaching in and grabbing the pack from my coat pocket. I took a deep breath, hoping to hell I could explain this to him and handed the pack over. "Here."

"What the hell, Sam? When did you start smoking?" Dean snatched the pack away, opened it and looked at me like I had twelve heads before he gently shook the contents out of the package. "This some new kind of vape?"

"No, Dean, it's not even tobacco," I paused for a moment, tried to figure out how to say this and took a deep breath, "okay, so, it's the spell."

"The spell?" Dean repeated and I knew it wasn't to be annoying, just… more of a way for him to confirm what he was hearing. "As in the spell to get rid of the AU monster that we've been prophesied to be puppets to?"

"Yeah."

"How?" Dean snapped, pulling one out to look inside the small glass vile. The swirling green content had flecks of rock and other materials in it. "How did you get this and exactly why do you think it will work?"

"Balthazar…" I started and Dean whipped his head around.

"Balthazar, as in the douchebag who's been watching you strip? The Dick with wings that thinks you're some kind of penthouse pin up that's all his to ogle at? That Balthazar?"

"Dean," I sighed as his voice got louder, trying to keep mine at an even level, but I could see he was fuming. "Dean, come on…"

"No!" And that snap made me jump, something he saw, that made him automatically back down, as always, before he ran a hand down his face. "Look, it's not that I don't appreciate the help from on high, okay, I do, but… Sam, what he was doing… he had no right."

"It's just a body," I brushed off, tried to brush off, but even that response seemed to piss him off.

"It's your body, and angel or not, he had no right to watch you." There was my protective older brother, defending my honor against angels. Angels that had been watching over us since before we were born, who had pulled us both from hell, who had… no, he was right, and the uncomfortable, nauseous feeling deep in the pit of my stomach rose, and I swallowed back the sudden unease. "Sam?"

"I'm fine, Dean," I breathed in deeply, stuffing that creeped out feeling down. "So," I cleared my throat, reached over and tapped the pack. "He said that everything we needed was in there, the spell too, and we'd know what to do when we got there. It's Enochian but I didn't get a chance to really look at what it said, caught a couple words but that was it before he popped out and I was standing there looking like an ass."

"Okay, so what do we do with this?" Dean questioned, pulling the paper out of the box. I was focused on the road, but I could tell he was going over it with a fine-toothed comb, there was no way that Dean was going to just play this one by ear, not with what was at stake.

"I guess we work it out when we get there as far as the actual execution of it. Somehow we have to get it in so the girls can see it and know what to do." That paper came down, Dean snorted and I shook my head, thinking the same thing. "I know, how are we going to pull this off, but like you said, the girls aren't weak, they're better than us."

"I hope we're right," his reply was low, and it brought me back to a conversation with Gwen from the nights we spent at the roadhouse.

Dean had fallen asleep, actually funny enough, Dean and Jai had fallen asleep watching some crappy movie that they argued over pretty much the entire time, and both were sacked out on the couch, which I could see from the doorway. I was sitting outside the room, feet kicked up on a chair with a beer in my hand, just thinking, but from where I sat, I could see Dean with his arms crossed over his chest, legs stretched out in front of him and his head back.

Jai was taking up the rest of the couch, curled up with her head on the arm rest, arms tucked up against her chest, but her feet were either touching Dean's leg or sitting right on top of it. It's not that their contact was strange, but it was few and far between, and when it did happen, I knew it was because of something no one knew about, like some sort of hidden fear. The need to know the other was close.

Gwen stepped out from the small kitchenette, a rocks glass in hand filled two-fingers full of the honey whiskey she liked so much, something, I found out, that Jai kept her supplied with when she came back from any hunt that took her in the vicinity of Kentucky or Tennessee, but Gwen just moved around my feet and sat in the white metal chair beside me with a sigh.

"You okay?" I asked quietly and watched her stare up at the stars for a moment before she gave me a curt nod and sat back. "What's on your mind?"

"A lot," she whispered and sat forward again. "The list of items that we have for this spell, to get rid of this monster, half of them don't make any sense. There's no real need for stones, or fossils."

"Maybe it's just the energy they give off, or…" I paused, "or the age of them? I mean, stones, fossils, they're old, right? So, maybe that's what it needs, the power of something old."

"A cactus, Sam?" She huffed and looked at me, "it calls for a cactus."

"Which is pretty rare, I guess." I shrugged, trying to wrap my head around the idea that she was right, that these were some pretty odd things. "Listen," I brought my feet down, and turned in my chair, slipping my fingers around her hand, just to hold it, "I have no idea what's going on here, Gwen. We found this spell after going through books that shouldn't even be considered remotely plausible for research, but it's all we got."

"You sound like Jai." She whispered, rubbing her eye.

"And you sound like Dean, which is strangely okay. We need to have some kind of skeptical outlook on this, right?" I didn't know why I was arguing, or giving her the other side of the coin, but we had to look at this from all angle. "I kinda wish Cas was here."

"Me too," she said softly, and I knew she missed him, hell, Dean missed him, and that said a lot when Dean would admit to something like that. She peeked around me at the two in the room and gave a quick smile. "Something's up."

"Yeah, not much," I grinned, "just the end of the world," I looked back at them, "they just want to make sure the other is on level ground."

"Either that, or they'll start fighting as soon as they've opened their eyes." Gwen laughed, and it was something amazing to hear. She never really let go much, and I was very happy to hear it. She squeezed my hand, tossed back the rest of the whiskey, before looking out at the stars. "I, for one, would be glad for whichever."

"Really? You would think you've had enough of their bitching at each other." I laughed, glancing in as Dean shifted, moving her foot from his leg to lay over his lap, something that got Jai to turn onto her back and grab the blanket from behind her to cover up. I heard Dean mumble something and Jai shrugged in reply but the two of them went right back to sleep. "Maybe you're right, so would I."

"Sam!" Dean voice reverberated off the walls but I couldn't quite narrow down where he was, as I ducked out of the reach of the blade. The tunnel was dark, whatever the hell the yellow stuff was that they tried to blow in my face stung my eyes, making it harder to see through the blurred vision from the tears. I felt the hit from the side, pain radiated through my jaw but it gave me a direction, and I turned and swung. "SAM!

Grabbing the shirt or robe, whichever the coarse material was, I brought my fist down and started beating on whoever was in front of me. It wasn't a female, this one had mass to him, and a deep grunt every time a punch landed, until I let him go and heard him hit the floor, but that was about the same time I was struck from behind.

My lungs wouldn't inflate, I couldn't take in air as well as I needed, but I twirled at the attacker, finding nothing but empty space. I breathed in as deep as I could, wheezing as I tried to focus my vision.

"Dean!" I huffed out, as loud as I could, but there was no reply, in fact, all of the sound in the room started to disappear. A few more echoed thumps against the dirt floor and I found myself spinning in circles. "DEAN!

And then the world went silent.

The pain wasn't like a migraine, wasn't like a hangover either, but it was dull and it ached, and I just wanted it to stop. I blinked aware, turned on my side and automatically searched for Dean, who was leaning up against the wall, eyes barely opened looking past me. His brow was creased, as if he wasn't sure what he was looking at, but I followed his lead.

Right beside me, through the bars, close enough to reach out and touch, was Jai, and I knew why Dean was looking. The bruise on her face ran from just below her chin to encompass her entire eye, dark purple and red, but barely swollen enough to block her vision. Her lips were split in a few spots, and blood had caked to her hair, trickling down just below the hairline in the middle of her forehead, but she was breathing.

I reached out, ran my hand down her cheek, carefully brushing over the bruise and felt the warmth of her skin beneath my touch. Too warm. I glanced back at Dean, heard him shift as he got to his feet and he moved to the bars at the end of my feet, a movement I followed. There, across a large enough space that they were never going to be able to touch, was Gwen and Cas, separated by bars on all sides and my heart broke.

I could touch Jai, feel that she was alright, but I watched the way hope crumbled in Dean's eyes as he scanned over the space between them. I heard his voice crack as he said their names, but his lips turned up in a smile as Gwen snarked back to him.

"It's about fucking time, Winchester," was her reply, as if she were trying to reign in her feelings and I couldn't help the huffed laugh that escaped me, not as that grin widened on my brother's face.

"I only aim to please," he snorted and turned back to me. I glanced from him to Gwen, and landed on Cas. "She okay?"

"Sleeping, looks like." I replied, but didn't move from my spot, shifted to sit up more, but didn't leave her side, or take my hand off her. I glanced back to Cas. "What happened?"

"Apparently, I'm not as stealthy without my angelic powers as I thought." Cas sighed, shrugging in a who would have thought gesture. Dean snorted again, as if he expected that answer but the body on the other side of the bars shifted, taking my attention away.

Her eyes fluttered open, locking bright blue ones on mine and I drew in as deep of a breath as I could before I pressed against the bars. I needed to touch her, needed to hold her and when she shifted towards me, when her hands touched my face, my resolve gave out. All I needed was her kiss.

Everything seemed a blur of emotions, a rush of physical need to touch and make sure that she was real, and alive, and then I found myself standing and staring at the wall behind her. Enochian… hell-script. The spell, I was looking at the spell. My hand twisted Dean's shirt as I stood there, taking it all in.

She knew! How could she have known? My eyes left the wall, stopped explaining everything and I turned to look at her leaning against the bars.

"I'm still going to kill him!" Dean snapped and moved forward, shoving me back as he looked over the wall. Kill who? It took me a moment to realize he was talking about Balthazar again. I moved towards Jai, who stared at the side of Dean's face before slowly moving up to look at me. "So, you got this all from a dream?"

"Not a dream, so much." She shrugged, her eyes locked on mine, as she licked her lips, a motion that had me staring at them, longing to kiss them again. "A memory."

"Of who?" I reached out, searching, and found her fingers as her hand rested against her side. Taking them in mine, I heard Gwen sigh.

"Does it matter?" Gwen questioned. "You already confirmed that it was something familiar to you, not bad," she paused, "not good either, but at least we can use it."

"Use it?" Dean whispered, moving away from the back of the cell to stand by me. "I don't want to touch it. How many times have we believed that something more than one of us has seen is a good thing? How many times have we been in something like this where we believed we were getting help but we got screwed over in the process?"

"Dean," Cas' voice was calming but also had a bit of dominance in it, and I had never seen Dean shut his mouth so fast. "This is a good thing."

"Because it came from angels?" Dean's tone dropped, waiting for him to argue, looking for a fight.

But the response came from Jai, not from Cas. "Because it came from Gabriel."

I blinked, stepped back, and looked between the three of them. Jai's lips twitched in a bit of a smile before she dropped my hand, put a few feet between us and looked over at Cas with worry.

"Gabe?" Dean huffed, arms crossed over his chest. "Cas is pretty much stripped but you're getting help from Gabe?"

"He is an archangel," Cas defended, but Dean raised a hand. My attention moved between them, trying to grasp all of it. "He would have the most power available to break whatever is keeping mine at bay."

"And if he really loves her," Dean pointed at Jai, "really cares about you," his hands clenched, "then he'd get us the hell out of here."

"It's not that simple." Gwen stated, grabbing his attention. Dean started to pace, trying to wrap his head around everything, but that didn't help the fact that he felt trapped. That feeling would start to overwhelm him, start to grow uncontrollable, and when it came to a head, no one in his path would be safe. "If what I suspect is true, Gabe gave her this a long time ago."

"How?" Dean paused, anger towards Gabe growing in his eyes. He needed an out, someone to hate because our foe was still a faceless enemy. "How and when would he have given her something like this?" He gestured to the wall, but his eyes landed on Jai, who slowly sat down on the bench, staring at the symbols. "Jai," her eyes never moved, just blinked at the sound of her name, "I'm trying to understand, Sweetheart, so you gotta give me something."

She drew in a breath, finally turned in his direction, and I squashed the sound of the gasp that tried to escape. She was crying, the tears giving her ice blue eyes, but they were filled with pain and I moved towards the bars, wrapping my hands around them, wishing I could get through.

"When he brought me home," she whispered, and I heard Dean stumble back. My eyes were instantly on him, on the look of shock written on his face as his body slumped against the opposite wall and his hands came up to tent over his mouth. Whatever this meant, Dean understood it, felt it deeply, because his own eyes started to flood with tears.

"Jai," I whispered, quickly turning back to her, but she was once again staring at the wall, "Gabe gave you this for a reason." Not that I understood it, not that I knew where he brought her home from, but if it got the reaction like that from Dean, it must have been pretty bad. "We need to use it, we need to understand it. Please," I took in a deep breath, "please, help us understand."

"Okay," I heard her whisper and she gently wiped away the tears before turning back to me, "but we can't fuck this up."

"Great," Dean growled softly, "this is going to be fan-fucking-tastic."

The blindfold was ripped off, letting the flood of orange light from the torches sting my eyes. I blinked back the pain as I focused enough to look around. Dean's arm bumped into mine as he shifted closer, but I could hear Jai's breathing, a little wheeze from the flight she put up to my right. The ruffle of Cas' trench coat shifting came from behind me, right before I felt the scratch of Gwen's nails searching for any kind of contact just to his left.

We were all there, facing out, taking in the large room we were in. It was a tomb, filled with old sarcophaguses, random statues of old Gods and new, but as I looked down, I noticed we were standing in some sort of strange symbol, one that I had seen on the wall, and my hand reached out for Jai's.

Her small fingers wrapped around mine the best she could, and I felt her shiver. This was it, this was as close as we were going to get and I leaned down, swallowed, and pressed my lips to her ear.

"Jai," it was just for her, but I knew it had to be said, "I love you."

Her head whipped in my direction and her blue eyes filled with anger. "Don't you dare!" She snapped and I stood straight, looking down, captivated by how the fire caught them, making them so much more intense. "You're an asshole! Don't you dare say that to me!"

"Jai, I…" but I knew how she had taken it.

"Not when I can't say it back," her voice turned to a whisper, and I watched her swallow. "Not yet."

"Okay, lovebirds," Dean's voice broke the tension and he turned into the circle, putting his back to the empty room. Cas turned, Gwen followed, and I slowly reached out, brushing my fingers over Jai's neck when she looked away, locking her eyes on her partner's. "Let's get it together. This thing starts with one thing, and if I'm a betting man, which you know I am, it's going to happen real soon."

"We have no weapons," Cas whispered, but as I looked around, I knew he was wrong.

"No," I replied, my voice going low, as I stepped in closer to the group, "We have everything we need." I held out a hand, saw Dean roll his eyes in classic fashion as he pulled the pack from his jacket and flipped open the lip. He handed us each a vile and then tucked the rest quickly away. "Don't use it until it's absolutely necessary, and as close as you can get."

"How will we know who we're aiming for?" Gwen asked, but I felt Jai shift beside me. She had turned to look and as she stood straight, so did the rest of us, following her lead.

Ten hooded men and women in red robes entered the room, circling us, creating a barrier as more entered from the other side, but as the four of us readied for a fight, Jai just stared at that doorway. She backed up against me, searched for my hand, which I gave willingly, and shook as she pressed back.

The power that filled the room was overwhelming, nearly enough to bring me to my knees, but it was Cas that stumbled, braced upright by Dean and Gwen as the thing in front of us came to a stop.

"Oh, I think we'll know," Jai whispered.

Mynoghra smiled down at the five of us. Her bright red hair flowed down over her shoulders, fiery against the gold of her cloak, but it was the green as grass colored eyes that roamed over our features that had me shivering. She was powerful, more so than I had ever imagined, but I was drawn to it.

"Well, aren't you five the most precious things I've ever seen?" She smiled, her voice like honey, and I heard Dean give a low moan. "Too bad I have to kill you." She sighed, moving closer. "What I wouldn't give to play with all of you, and by play, I don't mean with whips and chains, unless you're into that."

No one said a word, not even Dean, who tensed at her approach. I could feel the heat rising up in me, smell the sweetness of her as she got closer, but Jai shifted, catching my attention again. Her eyes narrowed on the creature, she tilted her head just a bit, as if she were seeing something we weren't and my eyes went back to the witch.

Wrong move.

As soon as I looked at her, my vision became hazy, I was lightheaded again and this calm seemed to wash over me. I felt Cas shoulder me aside, make room for himself between me and Dean, but I didn't put up a fight, just stared at her.

"Let them go!" Cas growled, as if he still had his powers, but she only smiled, folding her robes around her, and the room vibrated with magic.

"Oh, my precious Castiel," her golden voice made my eyes want to close, but with Cas being so close, there seemed to be a barrier between us, one that shimmered. Maybe he wasn't powerless after all, because she didn't seem to be effecting him. "You seem to have forgotten the whole reason for you being here. I need a vessel and you… well, you're it because of what you did."

"Because of Dean? Because I raised him from hell?" Cas questioned.

"In the last ten years, what have you done?" She moved away to stand directly in front of Dean and my vision changed from hazy to almost crystal clear, but that didn't stop the desire in me, the need to follow every command she gave. "You've disobeyed your father, you've become human, you've rebelled against Heaven," she paused, ran her hand down Dean's chest, something he didn't back away from, and watching it, something inside me clicked. That was wrong, Dean would never willingly let a witch touch him without a fight. Her bright eyes flickered to Cas, "You fell… for him."

"No," Cas snapped, "I fell for all of them, every one of them standing here and not." Cas raised a hand, removing her's from Dean's chest. "I fell for family and I'm not going to let you take them, not now, not ever. No one's going to sacrifice themself for you."

"Really?" She only smiled, let her hand drop and raised her chin just a bit. She was cocky, but smart, knew she could win, but wasn't letting Cas egg her on to make a mistake. We were way out of our league here. "Tell me, Castiel, what would you do to save them?"

"Take me," he offered, "you need a vessel, I'm right here."

"And who says it's you that I need?" She raised a brow, her voice slipping back into that honey slick sound. "What if it's," her eyes moved over the four of us, but landed on Gwen, "her?"

"Don't touch her!" Cas stepped forward, blocking Gwen from the witch.

"Oh, hit a sore spot, did I?" She giggled before she twirled and came back down the line, stopping in front of me. "Hello, handsome," her voice washed over me and I drew in a deep breath, "my, you are a stunning example of a man, aren't you? Tell me, Sam, do you dream of being the King of Hell? Ruling over those bodies at your feet? Can you taste the power that your little," her eyes shifted to Jai, whose hands were clenched at her sides, but her eyes were locked on a spot on the ground, "hunter... gives off when she slices them open?" Her gaze landed back on me and she winked. "What if I told you that I could give you all of that. Her," that gaze flickered to Jai again, before resting on Dean, "your brother by your side," then shifted to Gwen, "your friend at your beck and call, and an angel," she narrowed her sights on Cas, "either up on a rack or doing your bidding?"

I swallowed past the need to say yes, fought with the suggestion in her voice to say yes, and dug my fingernails into the palm of my hand before I leaned forward, locking eyes with her. "Screw… you."

"Awe, Sammy," she sighed, "we're going to have to work on that."

"It's Sam," I growled through clenched teeth.

"Not for long," she winked and slipped to stand before Jai, but as I watched her stare down at her, Jai never shifted, never looked up, not until I saw the edges of her lips curl up, and she raised her head to look at the witch, electric eyes staring from under her hair. "Well, now," was all the witch said before she clicked her tongue and moved back down to Cas. "Five of the most powerful hunters in the world are standing right in front of me, Castiel, are you really sure that you're the one I need? Three of them have walked through hell," she paused to look at Gwen, "and one of them has lived it. You may be an angel, but there are parts of you that are still righteous enough to resist me."

"Let them go." This time there was desperation in Cas' voice, "take me, I won't resist."

"You really think it would be so easy? There are rules, Castiel, rules that need to be followed in order for this to all take shape. As much as I would love to say yes, and take what you offer," she tilted her head, eyeing over him before she shook it, "that's not how this works."

"It can be," he argued. "It's simple, you have a willing vessel, there's no reason to harm them."

"Oh, as tempting as it might seem to agree to that, I have a better idea." She reached out, ran her fingers down Dean's cheek and I felt my breath hitch, as a soft purple light followed along the path her fingers made. Dean's eyes went dark, angry, and I saw his fists clench.

She moved down the line, doing the same to Gwen, whose eyes filled with terror and she sunk to her knees.

"No!" Cas yelled, going down with her as he pulled her close. The witch stepped past me to Jai, who still had that look of defiance in her eyes, but let them flutter closed when the bitch touched her. I heard her deep breath, before those blue eyes opened becoming nothing but black murky pits.

"Jai?" I whispered softly, but the hunter next to me only stilled at the name, she didn't respond any other way.

I swallowed hard, drew in a few deep breaths, and then her cold fingers were on my cheek, drawing down to under my jaw, and my world filled with orange flames and the sound of chaos.

"What are you waiting for?! Now! Sam, now!" Ruby's voice echoed in my head as I spun in a circle, but it seemed… off. I knew this place, knew this time. Knew exactly what the hell was going on, but I didn't understand why.

Lilith was laughing, I would remember that tone anywhere, even in my nightmares. "You turned yourself into a freak. A monster. And now you're not gonna bite? I'm sorry, but that is honestly adorable."

Her voice just bounced off the empty space as I turned and looked at the church I stood in. The pounding on the door was rhythmic, scenes of my life flashed before my eyes as the blood ran from Lilith's body, flowing towards the center of the room, but I couldn't focus, all I could see was the room spinning.

"I can't believe it." There was her voice again, they were the words that sang through my nightmares, that flowed through me when I knew I had failed, but they were wrong… they sounded wrong. "You did it. I mean, it was a little touch-and-go there for a while, but... you did it."

That got me to respond and I turned and looked at the woman before me. "What? What - what did I do?"

No, this was all wrong. I wasn't looking at Ruby, not my Ruby, with the long black hair, the one who would have killed and probably had done so for just some French fries.

"No." I shook my head, feeling the world around me screeching to a halt before reversing and spinning backwards.

She continued speaking, moving towards me, as my heart raced in my chest. Her short blonde hair was exactly how I remembered her when we first met, but now she was saying things to me that she wasn't even present for. "You opened the door. And now he's free at last. He's free at last!"

"You're not her," I whispered, searching myself for a blade, trying to will one into existence as the church around me faded, the blood seeped closer, slowly turning in a circle, creating the portal that blinded me in my sleep.

"And it is written that the first demon shall be the last seal. And you bust her open." The feeling of an ice pick being shoved into my temple had me grasping at my hair, begging it to stop. "Now guess who's coming to dinner."

"Oh, my god," but it wasn't shock that got the response this time, it was the pain.

"Guess again." And I landed on my knees, vision blurring as the pain hit just behind my eyes. "I'm sure you're a little angry right now, but, I mean, come on, Sam! Everyone needs to give in at some point, everyone bends the knee, to the next queen of the world. Even me, and," with a smile she squatted down in front of me, a wide grin on her evil face as she ran a hand through my hair, gripped it tight and yanked it back. "Even you have to admit, I'm awesome!"

Wrong! All wrong, and finally the realization of who I was looking at hit me like a hammer to the skull. I clenched my teeth, knew this wasn't right and lowered my hands, because if this wasn't real, if this memory was all wrong, than I wasn't really here, and the others needed my help.

I smiled up at her, blood seeping down from my lip that I had bitten to keep in a scream, and watched her smile fade.

"Meg."

I breathed in deep, taking in all the air I could, feeling as if I were drowning, but as I pushed up from the ground, things around me cleared. Behind me Cas cradled Gwen in his arms, speaking low, rocking her as she stared blankly at the floor before her, terror in her eyes. He looked up at me, blue eyes locking on mine as he pushed her hair back but his gaze moved away from me to the sound of grunts and quickly l turned.

Jai had Dean pinned to the ground, strange feat for such a small person, as Dean struggled to move her hand away from where the blade pressed against his throat. Her eyes were still black as night, but even Dean's scowl told me he wasn't all there either. They were trapped in their own hells, pitted against each other.

I scrambled to seperate them, but as soon as I reached out to touch Jai, I was tossed back across the floor by some unseen forcefield. There was no way to pull them apart, not when I couldn't get my hands on her.

There were things they knew about each other, things that they didn't share, but from the hints I had gotten, I knew it was bad, and if her eyes were like the demons she killed, there had to be only one reason.

Jai was in hell.

Maybe… maybe not the actual place, maybe she had never suffered like Dean and I had, but she was in someplace dark, had to be in order to know just how to get them to talk. I scrambled over, staying as close to the floor as possible because I could feel the Mad Queen's eyes on me before I stopped slowly rose to my knees and leaned on one arm to reach out for Jai, knowing that I couldn't touch her.

"Hey, Jai," my voice cracked as I whispered loud enough that she could hear me but the pressure on the knife was winning, and Dean's arms, as strong as he was, shook under her weight. "Jai, please, don't." I wasn't sure how to do this, never had to pull someone back like this. "Don't kill my brother."

I licked my lips, the dryness on them felt like my whole body was starting to shrivel but it had been nearly twelve hours without water, and the heat in the room was building.

"Jai, listen to me, it's Dean!" I snapped, but she didn't move. What could I say to make her realize what she was about to do, what she would have to live with if she hurt him? "Do you remember when Dad died?" Her hold wavered, Dean was able to push up on the knife but only a bit, taking it away from the skin just under his jaw. "We were at Bobby's... and Dean," I paused to let the memories to catch up. "Dean was in the back of the yard, we had been there a week, fixing the Impala. I broke." The burn of the tears that filled my eyes made me blink to stay in focus. "I broke and I told Dean that I wasn't okay, that I… I picked a fight with Dad, I spent my whole life angry at him, that he died thinking I hated him, and I did…" Trying to breath in, hold back the emotions was harder than I thought. "I was so pissed because of the life we lived, but do you know what I saw after I turn and walked away, after I ran back and watched from the shadows as Dean beat the shit out of his car?"

She didn't move, the outward fight continued as she pressed down and he struggled against her, but they were staring at each other, as if it wasn't just a physical battle, but each one was reliving something. I just had to make sure what they were seeing stung.

"I saw you." A tear slid down my cheek. "Not your face, not anything that I can remember, except… your voice." I smiled, suddenly, like it was all coming back. The way she said his name, I always wondered why it was familiar. "You called out to him, came around the car and stood there like you were the baddest woman in the world. I don't know what you said, but I could see it all in his face, all the emotions I had been trying to get him to admit, you were pulling out of him two seconds after stepping into his path. And then," I would never forget this, never in my life. "He pulled you in so tight I thought he was trying to strangle you. Do you remember, Jai? Do you remember how he cried on your shoulder? How you told him that everything was going to be okay, that no matter what he had you?"

Blink. She blinked! Her breathing hitched, I watched it all.

"You can't kill him, Jai!" I dropped my tone, made it almost a command. "He's your best friend, your brother, Jai, you love him too much to hurt him." It was a point I was trying to make, and whether or not the best friend part was true or not, the rest of it was.

She blinked again, her lips parted, erasing the snear from her face, and that blackness faded. Blue eyes stared down at Dean as she swallowed, a tear clung to her lashes. The blade shifted, giving Dean the upper hand and his eyes widened. I watched him clench his jaw, ready to strike, but that small drop fell against his cheek and he closed his eyes as it rolled down his face.

Going from what felt like slow motion to a sudden twist, Dean had Jai on her back, her eyes wide with fight or flight, but Dean snagged the knife away, dropped it on the ground and grabbed her shirt with one hand as he sat back on his knees, straddling her and yanked her up.

I let out a breath as I finally sat back, watching as Dean held her close, one hand gripping her hair. My eyes closed when she finally relaxed and put her arms around him, fisting up his shirt between her fingers, and my breath shook out in relief when he whispered quietly to her.

"Don't pin me down again, okay?" And it was just a Dean thing to say to her. Nothing to do with the knife, or the demon inside, and a smile played across my lips as she nodded.

That was when the scream rang out through the room.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Gwen

"When the night was full of terrors… and your eyes were filled with tears…"

It wasn't even the right song, wasn't even around when I was younger, but the words echoed through my head, like Jai on repeat, and I realized where I heard the song.

The road to Hattiesburg, Mississippi, was a dark stretch of highway, and more than deserted in the middle of the night, Jai's preferred driving time. She was singing the damn song, her head leaning back on the seat, eyes glued to the road, though forever scanning for things that might jump out, but that wasn't where I was now.

I was standing in front of the tree, the one my father made me practice on, the one that currently had eleven knives sticking out from it.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do haunted by the ghost of you...Take me back to the night we met."

I turned towards the house, dropping the last one, before I started to run. The screams dulled the sound of my heart beat, of the rhythmic in and out of my own breathing, and I know I yelled. I called for my mother, for my father, but there was nothing but the terrible haunting screams of my mother.

Entering the house seemed to jog everything, every memory I had repressed, every flash of the horror that had gone on at that very moment came flying back at me and I felt the fear that I had squashed down.

They were fighting, or at least, I assumed they were, but there was blood everywhere. Every inch of the kitchen seemed to be covered in the splatter of drying liquid, some old and brown, others bright red, but it streaked down the walls. I could hear my father reciting Latin, but it wasn't the exorcism that I had come to know by heart. Whatever was in her wasn't a demon.

I raced for the door, wanting nothing more that to help, or hide, but I couldn't decide on that, I only knew that I had to be there. Until the sound of wings, giant beats, like a heart pumping stopped me in my tracks and a man loomed over me. His eyes were blue, so familiar and intense, but his hair wasn't all over the place like I thought it should be. No, it was parted on the side, slicked down and neat, like someone from the late 70's, but this man looked no older than thirty.

He reached out a hand, crouching down before me, as if he were trying not to alarm me in anyway, but I felt no fear, in fact, he seemed to be drowning out the screams. I knew him, which was more of a feeling than an actual fact, but he wasn't going to hurt me.

"You can't go in there, Gwen." His voice was just above a whisper, but he said it with such conviction that it almost seemed like an order instead of a suggestion. "You need not see what's going on beyond this wall."

"My mother is in there," smart-ass me growled out, and I clenched my fist, but I knew I wouldn't move, not with him there blocking my way. "My father is fighting to keep her alive."

"Turn around and walk away," his voice cracked, turning into something that mimicked a beg instead, as his resolve gave out, "there are bigger things than this, more you are destined for."

What the hell was he talking about? I just wanted to help save my mother. A scream broke though his barrier and I ran towards it, begin caught up in his arms. I struggled against him, did everything in my power to get away, but my heart wasn't in it. Touching him… it was like going home and I finally let the tears fall.

"She's going to die." I whispered through sobs, as I placed my hands on his shoulders, trying to pull away from the light grip his hands had on my waist. "She's going to die and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

"She was meant to, Gwen," he sighed, as if that made it any better. He tilted his head as if he didn't understand why I wasn't wrapping my brain around the fact that this was meant to be. "She has to die in order for you to find your path."

"You're out of your damned mind," was my only response because he was. He truly was. The screams grew louder, and over that, my Dad's voice grew higher, the Latin flowed freely and repeatedly.

"Gwen, look at me," the man before me whispered. "Gwen, come back to me." His hand moved to my shoulders, but my eyes were locked on that door, "Gwen…"

The next time I heard his voice, it was from behind me, far away into the darkness that closed in, and I turned towards it. A voice I knew, similar to the one in front of me but so much more. It was filled with love, hurt, fear, and I shook the hands off my shoulders as I faced the darkness and took a step forward.

"Gwen…"

The feeling of the sobs rocking my body, the way that my own breath betrayed me as to the emotional state I was in brought me back to the present faster than I would have ever thought possible, but it was Cas holding me, his sweet voice whispering my name and I buried my face deeper into his neck as I brought my arms around me.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I had to protect you, I had to… make those memories disappear." His admittance did nothing but make me hold him tighter. "I was trying to protect you."

"That's not it," I whispered back, as if my body wasn't betraying me enough, now my mouth wouldn't shut up. "I knew you," I sat back, looking into his blue eyes, the same ones that mirrored the man in my memories, a relative maybe. Cas always said that the Novak line had always been his vessels, they were made for him, and I shook my head. "I knew you, Castiel, and I didn't remember."

"You weren't meant to," he sighed, his lips suddenly against my forehead, "we weren't meant to be together at that point."

I picked my head up, looked around for the others. What the hell happened? I saw Dean literally hand Jai off to his brother, letting Sam wrap her up in his arms, as Dean crawled towards me. As soon as he was close enough, I let him take me in his arms, hold me tightly as he kissed me and felt both his hands on my cheeks. With a deep, shuddered breath, I looked up into his green eyes and watched as he scanned mine for anything, any indication about what I had just gone through, before he swallowed.

He sighed, reached out to place a hand on Castiel's neck to draw him in, but that hand didn't stay there, it moved between us, slightly shifting the pack from his coat to Cas' pocket before his lips were on mine again.

"Scared me," he mumbled against me.

"Scared you?" I laughed, trying to to find amusement in this. "I saw how you and Jai looked at each other, like it was going to be a bloodbath. How did you break it? I know your histories, Dean, how did you break out?"

"Sammy's a good kid." Dean beamed and the three of us looked at the way Sam just held onto Jai, her face pressed against his chest as he leaned on her head with his chin, eyes up to the heaven's probably thanking everyone but Gabriel. "He did it, he broke her out, and when I could see clearly enough to really see her, I couldn't hold onto the anger. I just let it go."

"You? You let something go?"

"Just like Elsa," Dean mocked, a teasing smile on his lips, and rolled his eyes.

"Dean," Cas sighed, "we need to move, to get out of here. We don't have time for this."

"You're right," Dean rubbed a hand down his face and took a deep breath as he looked at his brother, "hey, lovebirds, we gotta skedaddle."

That was when the power in the room fluctuated and a growl seemed to bounce off every part of the room. The three of us turned towards the witch, watching as she stood from what I would have assumed was her throne and made her way down to us. Arms spread wide as she let out a howl that shook the very foundation of the cavern we were stuck in.

Dean placed one hand on me, the other on Cas' back as he yell. "SAM!"

Looking over at the two of them, I watched Jai duck down, under Sam's body as he folded around her, protecting her from the dust that sprinkled from the ceiling, like his gigantic body would have saved her from falling rocks, but he wasn't letting her go.

Sam looked around, waited for the room to stop shaking, and grabbed her arm pulling her to her feet. I heard "go, go, go," just as she started moving towards me but that was also about the time that Mynoghra howled again and sent her followers fleeing, they were only human after all and a display of power like this was nothing they had ever seen before.

There were things I knew about this already, and the biggest was, we were totally screwed. You couldn't engage with her because one touch and we would all be back under her spell, which meant no hand to hand, which wouldn't work anyway since none of us had weapons. There was no sense in trying any magic besides the one thing we came in here with because she would just deflect it.

Jai tucked down beside me, hand going straight to my back as her fingers landed on Dean's. She looked up at me, gave a small nod and glanced around. "We're going to have to play this real smart."

"Ya think?" Dean replied, glancing up over Sam.

"They were wrong," I whispered and looked at the four of them. "We were wrong."

"Just another day on the job," Jai sighed, irritated. "Wait… what was I wrong about?"

"Not just you," I shrugged and smiled, "all of us."

"Well, time to fix it," Sam said pointedly. "We just need to figure out how."

That was when Jai did the stupid thing that Jai always does. She stood. Sam grabbed her arm, Dean reached out for her leg and I just rolled my eyes because I knew what she was doing. She was being the distraction that we needed to come up with a plan. I heard her swallow, take in a deep breath and watched as Cas eyed her closely.

"Pretty shitty when your plan doesn't work, isn't it?" Jai snarked and I turned to see what she was doing, hands out at her side, palms towards the witch in what she hoped was a hey, I'm unarmed here gesture. "Dean and I were supposed to kill each other, right? I mean, two possessed, and not by demons, just our own living hell. Take each other out, right, that was the plan?"

"You know nothing, child!" Her sweet voice, the one that had the boys under her control, was now a hiss, almost like a snake.

"No?" She nodded, as Cas leaned down and whispered into my ear that this wasn't the way it was supposed to go. "So, Sam wasn't supposed to kill whoever he saw in his visions, you know, sacrifice whoever was haunting his dreams? Never had to be one for the other did it? Just had to be one of us killing someone else."

"And here I thought you were the brawn of the pair," Mynoghra laughed, which made me kick into gear. I needed to scout the room, needed to know just where to stand, and as Jai pushed forward, I pushed away from Cas, nodding at the boys as well. Gods, I hoped this worked. "Imagine finding out there's a brain in there after all."

"Well, I do love to throw people off their game, even if it's just a witty remark." I could hear the smile in Jai's voice as Sam backed away from me just a bit and Dean slowly stood. "It took me a bit to figure out Gwen though, probably would have had to be something really bad for her." I stopped as I paced back just two steps from Cas and looked over at my friend, the way she paused, tilted her head to the side and cleared her throat. "Used her mom, didn'cha?" And my heart started to race. How could she have known? "Used that one vulnerable moment in her life where she would have done anything to make it stop," her voice was low, like she was feeling the same thing, "and when she couldn't, she'd end it," I watched her turn her head, just a little and look at me, giving me a wink, "because that's just who she is. If she can't save them, she'll join them." Jai nodded, as if she totally understood, but that was when Dean took a step back, putting distance between us. "You forgot one thing though," Jai teased, "she's Gwen fucking Bancroft."

Not that it made any sense at all but that one little line pissed off Mynoghra to the point where she sent out such a wave of power that it had us all back against a wall, all but Cas, who stood there, in the middle of the floor, staring at her.

The power that held us seemed to dissipate as she approached Castiel, but that was because she had put up a barrier between us, one that Dean ran straight for before Sam could hold him back. Jai inched closer to me, as I started, crouched down against the wall that I had been blown up against and she patted me on the shoulder.

"Had to egg her on, huh?" I scolded as I side-eyed and she shrugged.

"Just doing my part." She smiled and both of us turned to see Sam and Dean grabbing the nearest things, which happened to be candelabras. I shook my head as they pounded it against the invisible barrier and listened to her laugh. "Hard-headed sons of bitches, they'll never change, will they?"

"You want them to?" I questioned.

"Nope, I want them to keep on being a distraction." Jai sighed, looked over at me, tuned out the conversation going on between the angel and the witch and looked around. "Just do it already."

I looked at her, rolled my eyes at her impatience and shook my head, eyes back on Cas. "Just wait."

"Yeah, you go on holding your ass, and I am actually going to do something that might help." I glanced at her as she stared up at the wall behind me.

She patted me on the shoulder and disappeared from my view. She picked up a stone from the floor, looked it over with a strange knowledge of what she was holding and started to draw on the wall, but this time with sure strokes and not nearly half the words that were written in the cell.

I slowly stood, stepped up closer to the barrier as Jai worked effortlessly behind me, humming the opening piano notes to that one stupid song. Cas and the witch stood toe to toe and while I couldn't hear the conversation, Cas' face never waivered, he never stopped staring straight at the immortal being in front of him.

The sound of a rock being dropped or kicked along the solid floor was the only thing that tore my eyes from the angel in front of me. I focused on Sam and how he held the candelabra mid-swing. He was looking down, with a strange perplexed look on his face and I smiled as I followed his line of sight. There, just under the radar, just inside the barrier, a small stone spun, one that he had kicked. It didn't stop at the line, didn't turn to dust, it just slipped through.

This was it. It was almost time.

"Fine," a partial conversation filled the air as Mynoghra raised her voice, stepping forwards to squeeze Cas' jaw between her fingers, something I flinched at but he never moved. "I just need your body, Castiel, you don't really have to agree at all." She stepped up closer, almost pressing her body to his and I felt a flash of anger run through me.

Easy. His voice whispered as if he were feeling what I did and I took a breath.

"After ten years in the same body, this vessel is just as much part of you as your own grace," she continues her little monologue as the purple hue begins to grow around them. I found myself dancing in my spot, eyes going over to Dean, who was suddenly belting out the angel's name.

Sam had his arms around his brother's waist, holding him at bay as much as he could, but his gaze focused on the woman behind me. "Jai! Hurry up!"

"Stuff it, Stretch!" Jai yelled back, though it had no bite, no anger in her voice as she nearly giggled before calling him the name, and Sam brought his eyes back to me.

I took a deep breath, glancing back at the work Jai had done on the wall. They were wards, something that kept the witch's power trapped, and I shivered at the near perfection of it. Sigils and wards had always been her thing, but after, the best she had when coming to anything else was tracing paper and stick figures. She shot me a look, and a nod, and I closed my eyes, just as Mynoghra reached out to touch Cas' forehead.

Castiel, I let my thoughts take over, I give myself freely to you. I open my heart, my mind, and my vessel for you.

As my voice faded, I opened my eyes to watch him. Please, let this work. His eyes lit up a bright blue, just for a moment and then they were hollow as soon as she touched his head. The bitch even had the audacity to smile.

But that was when I saw him, not with my eyes, but in my mind as the feeling of being overly full in my own body suddenly took over. Outside, I could see everything going on, the way that her power grew, the blinding purple light that started to rise from her, but inside, all I saw was Cas, every variation of him that he had ever been, male or female.

I'm not so sure this is going to work. His voice was still that gruff, gravelly sound that made me shiver.

I smiled, looking at him, eye to eye with the angel. Have faith, Cas, and I couldn't help the giggle that escaped because how often do you get to tell an angel that. Sit back and enjoy the ride.

This would be much more pleasurable if I wasn't worried about the state of my body and what she might do with it.

You'll be back in your body soon enough, Jai's almost done. I reached out in my mind and touched him, a very unique and foreign feeling, but smiled. I've got you.

Cas kissed my fingers, before he stepped back and gave up any control. Outside, I turned to Jai, who shouted a deep, frustrated finally before she ran up beside me. I could see her playing with something in her hand and I dug the small vial out of my own pocket, before the two of us looked to Sam and Dean.

Both men were now standing completely still, Sam still holding Dean back as they watched that power grow until she stretched her wings, no Cas' wings out, just as the boys pulled the vials. Dean had slipped the pack into Cas' coat, which mean there was only one more thing to do.

Do it now! Cas' voiced echoed through my head, but it seemed to be something that linked the four of use together because both the boys looked right at us before they raised their hands, and those vials went flying from all of us.

Busting at the bottom of Cas' feet, the smell that suddenly filled the room was putrid and vomit-inducing but even as my stomach rolled, I kept my eyes locked on the witch inside Cas' body.

In unison, one word slipped from our collective throats. "Incendo."

Jai continues to whisper, her voice moving from my side as she backed away towards the wall, but my eyes were locked on the wall of purple flames that encompassed Cas' body. Inside my head, he's speaking the same Enochian that Jai is whispering behind me. Their voices intertwining together and the room began to shake.

I couldn't catch my breath as the flames suddenly exploded around him… her and a wail that rivaled anything was wrenched from Cas' mouth. It was deep, but almost girly, in the sense that it wasn't his own as the flames shot upward, still locked within the barrier. I lost sight of his vessel, couldn't see it through the flames, but as the voice inside my head quieted and the sound of Jai's died out, the flames shot straight down, like a backdraft, before disappearing into the ground, extinguishing at his feet.

I could feel Cas' power surge, the heat of his grace in me and the shadow on the wall before me only showed me one thing. Wings. Huge, black wings spread across the length of the cavern, bright blue light surrounded all of us and then I was suddenly alone.

Cas was staring at me through his own blue eyes, a slight smile across his lips and the fullness in my body was gone. We all stood silent for a moment, taking in the fact that the whole place felt different, that we were a quintet again. There was a relative peace, until the laugh started behind me.

"Oh, man, this is so getting printed out and blown up!" I whipped around to look at Jai. She stood there, smile on her face, as she stared at the phone in her hand before she looked up. "Dude!" Like I should have any idea what she was talking about. "You had wings!"

I blinked in disbelief for a moment. "Did you seriously take a picture?"

"You had a hot angel in you. I had to get his 'O' face." Jai laughed as I shook my head, and turned back to the boys. Sam was gently approaching what would have been the edge of the barrier, reaching out a hand, and he licked his bottom lip, pulling it in as his hand passed through thin air.

"You're ridiculous." I sighed, and took a step towards them.

"Yeah," she exhaled in relief, "but you love me anyway."

Dean ran to Cas, wrapped his arms around his body and pulled him in, eyes closed and relaxed, as Sam made his way towards the woman who was still smiling into her phone. The noise she made when she was caught off guard by his kiss made me smile, and I glanced over at them for just a moment before I headed towards the two still holding on tightly in the middle of the room.

Thank the Gods it was over.

With Cas' powers back, the trip back to the Impala took all of about two seconds, long enough to have Jai heaving up anything she might of still had left in her stomach far enough from me that I barely heard it. As soon as her sudden motion sickness was over, she turned and looked up at me, wiping her lip with her sleeve before Sam was able to hand her a towel.

"I'm hungry, and I need a shower," she bitched and raised a brow, a sure sign that she wanted me to fix it. I rolled my eyes and looked up at Sam who had stepped closer to me.

"Samuel."

He cracked a smile and held back his usual reply. Dean and Cas stood by the front of the car, taking the privacy they needed for Dean to really check him over.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay." He sighed, waited for me to respond before he shrugged a shoulder, "so, are you? Okay?"

"Once I get out of these dirty clothes and into something more presentable, I'll be just fine," I grinned and reached out, wrapping my arms around him. "Thank you, Sam." It was just something that needed to be said. "Cas healed everything in the cavern. The only one he needs to work on now is her, but she has a thing for showing off bruises, so, you might want to work on her instead."

"I have, believe me," Sam laughed, kissed my hair and ran his hands over my back, "I just needed to make sure about you."

"Isn't this the most lovely and heartwarming sight?" Crowley's voice made each of us turn to face the man who walked out of the woods. His hands were in his overcoat, he looked casual and unthreatened and he stopped far enough away that the only thing that could possibly touch him was Dean's knife, and that still had to be tossed. "No worries, loves," he smiled, "I just came to congratulate you all on not dying, though it really does spoil my dinner plans." His eyes landed on me as he winked. "Well, now. Since we got those pleasantries out of the way. I'll report back to Singer and leave you to it."

And just as suddenly as he arrived, he was gone.

I looked at Jai and raised a brow. What the hell was that?

She shrugged, but also bit her lip, not a clue, but something's up.

I nodded, felt Sam release me as Dean's hand curled over my shoulder and the younger brother turned to move back to Jai.

Something was definitely up, but all I cared about right now was food, and hot water.

It was time to go.

The diner wasn't packed, at least it was quiet for a Tuesday about eleven a.m. Dean and Jai sat across from each other, closer to the window, eyes locked in a battle of who could make the most disgusting noises while eating. Sam was picking at his salad as he smiled at the war going on as I shook my head in annoyance, sitting next to Dean and the two of us were engaged in a conversation with Cas, at least until Jai cleared her throat.

"Hypothetically, if Cas was in Gwen when you had sex with her, would it be considered a threesome?" Jai asked Dean.

"How the hell should I know?" Dean paused, and that got my attention, "actually, sounds legit."

"Really?" Sam stepped in, "I don't think two people possessing the same body makes for a threesome."

"HA! You have an orgy with me all the time," Jai laughed, looking at him, as she wrapped her arms around his waist. "What? Think about all my personalities. Good luck figuring out which one your sleeping with tonight."

Sam just rolled his eyes, kissed her forehead, and went back to eating.

"I think your hypothetical assumption would be correct." Cas agreed, which had my head whipping in his direction, "a threesome requires three people, it never states that three bodies are involved."

"See, sounds legit." Dean nodded, but concentrated on his burger, since the conversation seemed to expand beyond his attention span.

"I can't believe after all this time, all this bitching, this is what the two of you ACTUALLY agree on." I was stunned, watching the faces of the two in the corner, how they strangely mimicked each other while they ate, the same content look on their faces as Jai grabbed her coffee and Dean downed some of the beer in front of him.

Jai just shrugged without looking up at me. "It's a fair question, G, I mean, to be stuffed full inside and out, sounds like heaven."

"Stop, stop right now." I raised my hand, prepared to make an argument but that was when the phone rang. Jai grabbed it from the pile in the middle of the table because there was only one exception to the rule of no phones. I looked at her face, as she stared at the screen and that smile faded. "What?"

"It's Bobby," She whispered, looking up at me, her blue eyes swimming with different emotions, before they turn hard, "looks like we've got a case."