Chapter Eight

Goodbye

Well...this is the funeral. Nothing else to say except thank you for the reviews, as always.

And people have been asking why I killed Melissa off. My answer: if I told you, why would you keep reading?


Stepping into St. Stephen's church, Will noticed the mood was not unlike yesterday's. Most everyone wore the same, dreary expression. The only thing he noticed that was different was that Cutler Beckett attending the funeral.

Will was shocked at seeing Beckett here. With his stony expression, Will wasn't sure whether or not he was distraught at the news, or if he had killed her and was trying to act as if he were a stoic.

He was looking at the board of pictures of Melissa posted in the entryway. Making his way to him, Will looked at the pictures. For a moment, he forgot about confronting Beckett and looked at the Melissa he had never gotten to know. There were ones showing everything about her short nineteen years on Earth. The baby pictures reminded him so much of Amy. He wondered how much she would grow to look like her mother.

As she matured, he began to recognize the Melissa that he knew. It was so strange to see the pictures of her – no one knew that within a few years, these would be the only memories left of her. He couldn't bear to look at them any longer.

Will tore his eyes away from the pictures and turned to look at Beckett, hands behind his back, who was looking at the opposite board. Will walked over to him.

"She was beautiful," Will began, looking at a picture of Melissa in a long lavender dress, her hair in a delicate up do. He turned his attention to Beckett. "It makes me wonder why you took such a life."

Not faltering for a moment, Beckett turned to him. "Everyone copes in their own way, Mr. Turner, but I would not expect that I would be blamed for her death."

Will was not going to let Beckett get away with Melissa's death. He was convinced that he was the one who was responsible – he wasn't sure why, but he just knew that he was responsible for her death.

"You drive a black Mercedes and claim that you love this woman, yet here you are with no expression."

The expression of a killer, he added silently.

"Because I drive the same brand and color of the vehicle that killed Melissa does not mean that I am a suspect, nor does the fact that I am not as upset as her parents. Look at Sparrow, he seems quite fine. Why aren't you suspecting that he could have had a hand in her death?"

That was the instant that Will knew that Cutler Beckett had killed Melissa. He had made it so that anyone but him was the culprit. His green-blue eyes were now harder than before.

"Because Jack doesn't drive a black Mercedes," Will said softly through gritted teeth. "We were with him at home the night of the incident."

Beckett remained silent and stared him down. Even if nothing could be reported due to lack of evidence, at least he would know that one person knew something.

"You couldn't have a trial," Beckett said softly. "You have no proof, Mr. Turner."

"I never said there would be a trial. The only proof is that a secret doesn't last forever."

With that, Will walked away.


Kate could hardly keep her eyes off of Melissa's coffin. She didn't want to believe that she was in there, dead. Any moment she would pop up and say this was all a joke. She had never seen her dead – if she hadn't seen something, it couldn't be true, right?

They had sang "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan. Tears had brimmed her eyes when she heard the song being played. A song had never struck her so deeply before. Melissa had been nothing short of angel her entire life. She wondered if she was going to be one that would watch over them.

As she went up to read the eulogy, though, she was becoming more aware that Melissa was not going to pop out of the coffin. This was when she was about to give a tribute to her.

She really was gone.

She stepped up to the altar and went behind the stand with a microphone, her hands shaking from the harsh reality. The bottom level of the church was filled – she wondered how many people had attended the funeral of Melissa Lewes.

"Melissa is they type of person that you never forget," she said. "She's affected everyone that she's ever met in one way or another. Whether you talked to her when you needed to or listened to her advice...she was always there for you."

Kate could feel a lump forming in her throat. She couldn't will herself to look at the coffin. Kate couldn't afford to start crying now.

"She always shot for the stars. Melissa gave her all into everything that she did. She never gave up on something."

Kate looked at Jack and thought, Like you.

"She always wanted to go to Paris. There was something about that city that fascinated her. I'll never forget last year how she told me she wanted to go on top of the Eiffel Tower."

She winced inwardly when she realized she had said that a year to the day that she died.

"You always felt like you could go to her for anything. She gave me the best advice that anyone has ever given me.

"She could make someone laugh without realizing that she did. Melissa's made me laugh with her everyday views on life more than any joke."

Kate was beginning to see that this was harder than she thought it would be.

"Just the past year alone, I see how much she's changed. Anyone that knew her last year knew that she was a shy, innocent girl. She has grown so much stronger this year. She learned to think for herself. Those that know her...All we can say is that we've never been more proud of her."

She looked over at her parents, the first time in over a year that she saw them. Her parents looked numb – a rather weak word for two parents who lost their only child. She wondered if they were more numb at the fact that they lost her, or that they had never mended things (no one was that heartless – they had to feel some sort of remorse for what they had done over the winter).

"She was a wonderful mother. Melissa was starting to raise her daughter – Amy. The way that she looked at Amy is a look that I'll never forget. She was on her way to leading a wonderful life. Melissa was going to be a veterinarian in a few years...who knew what life she could have had."

She wanted Melissa to pop up from the coffin now. Kate didn't want to say the final words of the eulogy.

"Rest in peace, Melissa. We miss you."

She stepped down from the altar and went back to the front row of the "friends" half. Kate didn't make eye contact with anyone.

When the priest directed them to stand and make the final prayer, Amy started crying. Before Jack had a chance to, Will reached for her.

"I've got her," he mouthed to Jack. He picked her up in the carrier and began to walk down the aisle. She faced forward when he was a few rows away, then clasped her hands together and bowed her head.

Kate looked to see that Jack had his hands clasped, although she doubted that he was praying. She couldn't begin to guess what Jack was thinking about.

The gentle piano opening for James Blunt's "Goodbye My Lover" began after the prayers. It was the final song, one of Melissa's favorites. It was one Kate had listened to hundreds of times before without a second thought. She wouldn't be able to hear it without thinking of Melissa now.

Did I disappoint you or let you down?

Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?

'Cause I'd saw the end before we'd begun.

Yes, I knew you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what's mine by eternal right.

Took your soul out into the night.

It may be over but it won't stop there,

I am here for you if you'd only care.

You touched my heart, you touched my soul.

You changed my life and all my goals.

And love is blind and that I knew when,

My heart was blinded by you.

I've kissed your lips and held your hand.

Shared your dreams and shared your bed.

I know you well, I know your smell.

I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Kate reached out to hold Jack's hand. She laced her fingers through his.

I am a dreamer, and when I wake,

You can't break my spirit – it's my dreams you take.

And as you move on, remember me,

Remember us and all we used to be.

I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.

I've watched you sleeping for a while.

I'd be the father of your child.

I'd spend a lifetime with you.

I know your fears and you know mine.

We've had our doubts, but now we're fine.

And I love you, I swear that's true.

I cannot live without you.

They met eyes. His facade was still strong, although, if the song was doing to him half of what it was doing to her, he was being torn apart inside.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.

In mine when I'm asleep.

And I will bare my soul in time,

When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.

Goodbye my friend.

You have been the one.

You have been the one for me.

I'm so hallow, baby, I'm so hallow.

I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hallow.

I'm so hallow, baby, I'm so hallow.

I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hallow.


The sky above them in the graveyard was cloudy and threatened rain. Jack half expected it to start right now. It fit the mood all too well. Everything else had fallen in place with Melissa's death, what harm could a little rain do?

Jack had seen Beckett at the funeral. He wondered why he had come if he had indeed killed Melissa. He knew that people least suspected something that was in plain sight – people would automatically assume that whoever killed Melissa wouldn't attend the funeral.

Wrong, he thought as he imagined Beckett's smug expression.

Melissa's tombstone read:

Melissa Rose Lewes

April 17, 1989 – June 15, 2008

Beloved mother, child, and friend.

Why didn't Jack feel that that sufficed? People more than loved Melissa.

Her coffin started to be lowered into the ground. It was hard to believe that she was in there, dead. Only three days ago, she was alive and well.

He hated how quickly things could change. It seemed that life had constantly been changing for the two of them. It was always one thing right after the other – their meeting, their feelings, the pregnancy, the near death experience she had last year, and now, the death.

Kate had held his hand when "Goodbye My Lover" was playing, mostly for her sake (though, he had to admit, he had gotten chills when the line "I'd be the father of your child" was sung) and to show him support. Now, it was his chance to support her.

He didn't, though. She looked like she would scream if someone touched her right now. She looked stony and looked intently at the coffin being lowered.

The coffin had been fully lowered, and the dirt was laid over the coffin. People started to leave. Kate just stared at the filled hole where a new body in the earth.

It wasn't before long that the Lewes, Sparrows, and Turners were the only ones left. Her eyes remained forward. He half wondered if she was even aware that everyone had left.

"Katie," Jack said, gently touching her shoulder.

She jerked his arm off her shoulder and walked closer to Melissa's grave.


Kate looked down at the grave where her friend now lay. Leaving the cemetery would sober her about Melissa's death. She'd be six feet under tonight, while they would be in a house.

She couldn't be separated now from her, not after everything that they had been through together.

It wasn't fair. Melissa had been murdered at nineteen and left a child behind. How could life be that cruel and take someone so innocent?

Melissa still had to tell Jack that she cared about him. She needed to see her little girl grow up into the woman that she had been.

She was vaguely aware of the thunder rumbling overhead and the rain starting to pour on them.

Kate wasn't sure the next time she would see the grave. A few months? A year?

The rain falling on her face mixed with her tears. She was starting to realize that Melissa was dead.

Kate hated both of those facts.