RichardIII1955 - Thanks again! I figured she would...teehee...let's see her spar against Mercutio!

Uh oh, Angelo's in trouble! But will Mercutio be of any help further down the line? Let's see...


Angelo limped up the pathway and into his house. He headed straight for the sofa and sagged down, with a whimper of pain. There was still time for him to go back to work, and still time for him to get a lot of things done, but he couldn't face it. He pulled a cushion over, and buried his face into it. His cheeks still burned red with humiliation. Tears of rage and frustration welled behind his eyelids.

He felt so violated. Why did he feel violated? They were doctors, they were only doing their jobs. He had consented to the examination. He needed to know what was wrong with him. Maybe they just didn't know how it felt to lay on the examination table, vulnerable and bare, as though they were merely an object.

But it wasn't over yet. They wanted to do a biopsy.

He winced in pain at just the thought, and curled up.


"Angelo!" called Escalus.

"Yes?"

"Could I have a word?"

"Sure"

Angelo sat down in Escalus' office.

"I just wanted to talk about the wedding and such," explained Escalus.

"Go ahead."

"Now, I've decided that Mercutio is old enough to take part in royal duties,"

"Old enough, yes, mature enough, I don't think so."

"Well, I've found a job that I think might suit him," Escalus said.

"Ok," said Angelo.

"I've put him in charge of entertaining the guests whilst they stay," explained Escalus.

"Ok," Angelo repeated.

"He's been having some good ideas, although I did have to explain to him that a 'Bouncy Castle Day' was not one of them."

"I don't think any of them would like that."

"Exactly. So I've made him change it," said Escalus, "But, anyway, I'm going to be so busy greeting and organising everything, that I can't be in four different places at once. I can't supervise Mercutio twenty four seven. So, I was just wondering if..."

"If what?" asked Angelo.

"If you could?"

"If could do what?"

"Control Mercutio."

"Control Mercutio?" repeated Angelo "Let me get this straight. You want me to control your mad, crazy, insane, uncontrollable, borderline schizophrenic nephew, when I can't even control my own freaky demented ballerina son who I'm sure has some sort of personality disorder?"

Escalus made some sort of noise.

"Well...in theory, yes," he said meekly, "But I've told him if he behaves himself I'll buy him a pet llama and let him keep it in the palace grounds."

"Jesus Christ," groaned Angelo. He rubbed his tired eyes. He'd spend another sleepless night and he could barely keep himself awake. Maybe he should have taken the day off. But he couldn't let anyone find out what was wrong with him. He just couldn't. Not here. Not now.

"Will you do it?" asked, Escalus "It's just...you have such a good, no-nonsense approach when dealing with him, and he's already prank-called the Duke of Gloucester and the Thane of Glamis."

"Well, I don't have a choice, do I?" sighed Angelo, "Yes, I'll supervise. But I have got a lot going on right now."

"I know, I understand. Being a grandparent is hard work."

It was on the tip of Angelo's tongue to say he didn't mean that, but he held himself back.

"Yeah, yeah, it is."

"How's the baby?"

"He's..." Angelo struggled for words. He'd only seen Alexei once, "...fine. He's very cute. He looks like Gabe."

"How lovely. Our little Micro is already causing chaos. He grabbed Allegra's lip balm and drew all over the walls, the little monster."

"I bet," said Angelo, "Oh, and I thought I ought to let you know. I need to take the afternoon off at some point next week."

"Oh, really? Anything urgent?"

"Dentist appointment," lied Angelo.

"Oh, ok, that's fine," said Escalus, "Just as long as you are able to supervise whilst Mercutio prepares his comedy show. I don't want...oh, I don't know, Queen Mab dancing around in some morally questionable outfit."

"Of course," said Angelo.

"And Angelo," Escalus added, leaning forwards, and talking quietly, "I know you're worried about the upcoming election, but this is the perfect time to raise publicity for yourself and let the public see you in a positive light."

"Oh," said Angelo, somewhat surprised, "Thanks. I'll take your advice."

"I don't want you to lose power, Angelo," admitted Escalus, "Out of all my deputies, I think I've worked best with you. Our ideologies are similar, and we've always been good at communicating our ideas with each other. I feel the same, you know, that we haven't been able to achieve as much as we would have liked."

"The opposition has just been so strong," agreed Angelo.

Escalus nodded and sighed, "But never mind. We can only look to the future. Take this opportunity while you can, Angelo."

"I will. Thank you."


Sitting in her office, Amparo listened to the conversation on the spy bug she had placed in Escalus' office a few weeks ago.

'Oh yes,' she thought to herself, 'we'll be taking advantage of this opportunity whilst we can...but you're going down, Angelo...'


"Will we make the news of the complaint public?" asked Isabella.

"Most likely," replied Amparo, as they perched on her sofa, watching Alexei suck his dummy, "But I am counting on rumours getting out before we are forced to make a statement."

"If so, how soon do you think it will be before rumours start to circle?"

"Just before the guests start to arrive," Amparo said firmly, "If so, we'll divert media attention away from the wedding. It gives us the chance to humiliate Angelo a little bit. When the electoral debates begin in September, which is a month afterwards, by then he'll have no support. He'll be an unsupportable party leader, which means our party will be forced to get rid of him...leaving his seat open for me."

"You're right. And it gives us time to build the scandal up a little. He could make excuses, say it was a misunderstanding. This way, we'll have the final say," Isabella agreed.

"Exactly," said Amparo.


"This," announced Mercutio proudly "is the pantomime we are going to perform for all the guests. It is called, Romeo Hood and his Merry Montagues! Romeo's Robin Hood, I'm Little John, Benvolio's one of our Merry Montagues, Gabriel's Maid Marian-"

"No, I'm not!"

"I was just kidding!" Mercutio called back. He turned and grinned at Angelo, "Gabriel is actually the Angry Drunk Fairy Godmother, aka Fairy G, and Tybalt is Jesus. They're going to narrate the play and make sarcastic comments the whole way through. Oh, and Tybalt as Jesus has to drag all the dead bodies offstage. That's why he's Jesus, and not, you know, Moses or someone."

"And tell me," Angelo yawned, rubbing his eyes tiredly, "Why our guests would like to see this?"

"Because it is an adaption of Robin Hood, a beloved traditional tale of the English people, and some of our guests are English," replied Mercutio calmly.

"And what language will you perform it in?" asked Angelo.

"Ah" said Mercutio "OI! GABE! WHAT LANGUAGES DO YOU SPEAK?"

"Italian!" hollered Gabriel from backstage, "French, German, Spanish, some Hebrew, some Latin, and English! Oh, and don't call me Gabe!"

"Whatever! Can you translate the pantomime into either English or French? That's probably going to be the most popular language of our guests."

"Why have I got to do it?" whined Gabriel, marching onstage, his fairy costume flapping around him, "Unless you seem to have forgotten, I happen to be the Danseur Noble of Verona Ballet-"

"Yes, we know!" Mercutio rolled his eyes.

"And I happen to be very busy preparing to perform in that too!" Gabriel snapped. He flicked his hair back, "We're also performing to the guests."

"Gabriel, mind your manners! Even if you are only talking to a nutter!" Angelo shouted.

"He called Merc a nutter!" gasped Hermia, "Umm! That's a bit mean!"

"How you be so mean, Angelo?" asked Romeo, hugging Mercutio, who was now pretending to cry, "Look what you've done! You've made our Wooshy-wo cry!"

"Cut it out!" Tybalt stomped out, wearing a long white robe and fake beard, "Or none of us Capulets will be in the panto!"

"Nooooo!" wailed Mercutio.

"Oi, I'm staying in the panto!" insisted Hermia.

"Yeah, and me!" added Juliet.

"And anyway, it's all right, Wooshy-wo, we don't want stupid Tibby in our panto anyway," said Allegra, hugging him.

"Meanie bum," Mercutio stuck his tongue out at Angelo and then Tybalt.

Angelo rolled his eyes, "I don't feel well. Please, just get on with the rehearsal so I can see if it's suitable."

"You don't have to, you know," said Mercutio.

"Yes, I do. Escalus commanded me to."

"And you do everything Escalus says, don't you?" taunted Hermia.

"Yes," said Angelo, "It is my job. Now get on with it. I could be sorting out my party's manifesto, but what am I doing? Supervising you kids!"

"We're not kids anymore, I'm twenty!" announced Mercutio.

"Well, why don't you act like it? When I was twenty I was working hard at university, worked thirty hours a week, was on the student council committee, and I was already involved with campaigning for the party which I now lead. I certainly wasn't calling people bum-bum faces and pooheads and wearing stupid outfits!"

"Oooh, you've gone and done it now, Mercutio!" Gabriel cackled, "Before long, he'll start mocking your chosen profession even though he's not particularly successful himself, and then-"

"That's enough," snapped Rosaline firmly. She glared at Mercutio and Gabriel, who both gave her cheesy grins.

"Just get on with it," Angelo sighed.

Halfway through the first act, whilst Rosaline was still backstage, Mercutio nudged Benvolio and Romeo, "Look!" he hissed, "Angelo's asleep!"

"Aww, sleeping beauty," snickered Romeo, "Who thinks we should draw a penis on his forehead in permanent marker?"

The rest of the cast giggled. Mercutio crept forwards, scribbled the penis on, and then grabbed Angelo's laptop.

"What are you doing?" asked Gabriel.

"Emailing Escalus, telling him how great and age-appropriate the pantomime is! Neither of them will ever know! Until it's too late!"

The teenagers laughed, leaving the sleeping Angelo as the latest victim of their pranks, and Amparo thanking her lucky stars for the badly behaved young adults. She and Escalus walked into the hall where they were rehearsing, and Angelo slept.

"How's the pantomime?" asked Escalus.

"Fine!" replied Mercutio, "Angelo emailed you just now. He says they'll love it."

"It's full of mature dry wit, intelligent sophisticated innuendo, with humour that's something for everyone," replied Romeo.

"Yeah!" cheered the others. Some of the cast who were waiting backstage walked on to see what the fuss was about.

Escalus smiled, "It's so good to see you all grown up. I don't know where the time has gone. Not long ago, you were all dressing in drag and dancing to bizarre music, and now, here you all are, budding actors and actresses!"

"And dancers!" added Gabriel loudly.

"And dancers," said Amparo, for Gabriel's benefit. He beamed at her.

Suddenly, the smile on Escalus' lips faded, "Now, I was actually hoping to have a word with Angelo."

"He's asleep," Mercutio pointed.

"Why has he got a...phallus, on his head? Mercutio, was that you?" scowled Escalus.

"No, why would I do such a naughty thing?" lied Mercutio.

Escalus frowned, "Are you sure?"

"Yes!" Mercutio frantically nodded. Escalus narrowed his eyes, and shook Angelo's shoulder.

"Huh? Oh, Escalus! I am so sorry, I was just-!"

"Spare it," said Escalus, with an unusual coldness. Rosaline narrowed her eyes. Gabriel raised his eyebrows and giggled.

"Your Grace?" Angelo asked, perplexed. He never usually referred to Escalus as 'your grace' unless it was a state occasion. They worked together, and so it felt like there was no need.

"We'll go to my office," said Escalus.

"What for?" asked Rosaline, following after.

Angelo was equally bemused as she was. He turned around, and gently patted her shoulder, "Don't worry, something's probably just come up. I'll text you later, sweetheart."

Gabriel glared at her enviously, but then Amparo stepped forwards and took him aside.

"This could take a while. Go back to work, and get ready for the evening performance."