Chapter Seven

Greedy Thing

Do not find fault in him

For we all hunger for love.

He can't make him again.

He has tried but he can not make him again.

Mammon, wearing nothing but a faded purple shirt and a pair of sweats, is sitting in his room, alone and tired and hungry and...

He's too afraid to go outside, outside and see the stares and hear the whispers and feel the burning of a thousand and one hot angry tearstained gazes on his back. you're not a little kid anymore, you have so much now.

Yes.

Yes...he did, didn't he.

After all, this was what he wanted wasn't it? He hadn't wanted Tsuna anymore, he hadn't wanted to see his face or hear his voce of feel his warmth or-or anything.

He didn't want...

But then what was he expecting?

What was he expecting, because good people wait, great people wait, but then there was Tsuna, stupid giving Tsuna who waited and waited and saw and saw and gave-

Gave so much, too much, too much...

but if he hadn't died, what then?

he brought you back in the future remember?

you couldn't bear to see him then.

he gave up something there too.

so why is this time diferent?

if he had lived this time, if he had lived this time would you be so regretful?

Well?

Could you claim to that?

He didn't know. He really didn't, he didn't know what to say or how to feel or anything anymore.

He was just...tired.

Very tired.

The room he is in is small, dark, almost cramped with a dresser with a mirror just three steps away from the bed along the wall. There is a nightstand and a window which releases a few small twinkling fragments of starlight into the room, trying in vain to give him some light.

His bulb was blown.

He hated the dark.

But he couldn't open the door.

He just couldn't.

Sometimes, at night, when he watches the sky and reaches out his hand to the unobtainable black blue forever of the sky just like the way Tsuna used to, just like the way the alive Tsuna used to he has to wonder-

'tsuna, from where you are, are you trying to give light to me?'

.

.

.

Once, once when he had a nightmare, Tsuna gave him a small nightlight.

He smiled, ran fingers through Mammon's hair- i think it's such a pretty color- and said-

'for when i'm not there.'

.

.

.

he found it smashed two days after Tsuna died. Retributation in its most cruel form.

hadn't he lost a light already?

.

.

.

When the happy days were with him, he used to ask Tsuna why he held out his hand to the stars, why he had kept reaching for them when he knew that he would never get them.

he had been so young then, the well had been so full of water...

Tsuna just smiled.

He tried to remember that smile, close his eyes and try to stitch it into the soft skin of his inner eye so that he would see it forever but...

He raises his hands and tries to recreate the way he was, the way he smiled and the way his eyes glinted the color of marigolds or the way that one piece of hair kept curling around his left ear and never went with the rest.

He tries to recreate him.

With the methodic preicison that came from counting bills for hours he begins to craft an image, and image in Tsuna's own likeness.

He didn't know how to bring Tsuna back from the dead, and even if he could he didn't know if he would of, but he is just...

He's not strong enough.

He's not strong enough.

He just...

He wants Tsuna to come and say- to come back and-

He wants to have him back again.

Him and all his blessings,

All of the things he should have been counting instead...

But he had so much water in that well, so much...

He wanted Tsuna back, he wanted every moment back, every kiss on the forehead back, every smile back, every laugh back, every single damn thing that Tsuna was and ever will be back and he wants to grab a firm hold of him then like he should of, and never ever let him go.

Tsuna was his strength.

And Tsuna was the first person to ever, ever tell him...

Tell him that he was loved.

Shakily, Mammon-greedystupidselfish- rub his face and looks at his handiwork.

It isn't Tsuna.

It's not and as much as it looks like him, smiles like him, walks like him thinks like him sounds like it him it isn't him and it never will be and all the money in the world can't buy back a body-

the dead don't need money unless it is underneath their tongues

Mammon slides off the bed from where he had been sitting on it and buries his face in his hands, stuck in a mock bow in front of the mere scraps of Sawada Tsunayoshi.

He feels his eyes well up but he doesn't cry, he says-

"I just wanted to hear you say...hear you say that I was good again..."

I didn't want you to leave, never wanted you to leave!

But you left, you left.

You left on the shoulder of the blonde boy, remember?

The one who is as lonely as you are.

Mammon blinks back tears.

Remember how Tsuna would never cry? Yeah, he was busy being strong for you.

All for you.

Worthless.

The Not Tsuna smiles and reaches out,

'Mammon!'

And its torture in its purest form, and because Tsuna still loves him it makes it so much worse-

On the floor, all alone, scared, helpless Mammon weeps.

It occurs to him in passing that all things must have a clear price. Because Tsuna said that he would wait forever-so vague- until Mammon needed him. And he did so with a smile and Mammon believed him, shoved him aside.

And now when Tsuna wasn't there to brush away tears, to keep away demons, to give him light and strawberry milk-

He wanted him.

Mammon can't make Tsuna again so...

"I...hic..want my Tsuna back..."


Summer day

Soft smile on yellow poppies.

Tsuna holds up a watering can and says to the flowers, so lonely

'Water, Mammon?'


A/N: I lied.

This one is worst, but...I kind of like it?

I just...I dunno, Mammon just has so little to go off of in canon you know?

I am sorry about my useless fluff and attempts on trying to make him somewhat ic.

Anyways...

*Looks at crying reviewers and reads reviews, awkwardly sets up tissue stand- get free tissues here!- and passes a few around*

Uhmmmm...

Would y'all kill me if I said that this stuff was just the early stages? The really tame stuff?

'Cause I don't want to die.

Yeah, I've got a 'plot' now, and I won't give too much away, but right now we are in the Melancholy Arc.

It's gonna be long and based on the reactions right after Tsuna's death. We're also gonna touch on character relations that would grow strained. You know, Fon and I-pin, Lal and Colonello, Colonello and Ryohei...stuff like that. We will also tackle some issues that got really muted in canon because let's be real, all of the character are fucked up.

Also, I'm not done with any of these characters. All of them will get a part two of some sort. (Particularly Reborn, see there was a lot I didn't touch on...)

After the Melancholy Arc, there may be a Retribution Arc that may or may not happen. Meh. There's a whole bunch of stuff y'all are gonna hate me for. You know, more death, disease... I am so looking forward to this. You have no idea.

(I think you all will love my ending...)

Hope to see you there!

Ciao~

Pink.

P.S The flower last chapter was indeed white tulips, which mean sorry/forgiveness. They are dead because...art, I dunno how my mind works. Did you catch the one this chapter? PM me and let me know! Then I'll...write you a request fic!

(I really love getting PM's...)

Goodnight!