Big thanks to Coffee Monsta for helping me name this chapter, I couldn't figure it out for the life of me and also getting me motivated to actually write, idk I had a big motivation/inspiration drop while I was trying to write this, it was annoying. Thanks also to Coffee Monsta (again), Justagenericusername, lisadewaele581, gotasegway, and TheShadeOps for your reviews. Alright, we got another important chapter ahead of us. Things are getting super plot heavy. If I leave too many plot holes be sure to let me know so I can fill them in.

Thanks for Reading, Fly High Aim Higher

~Spitfire out

Jay woke up slowly, groggy and disoriented. He sat up, rubbing at his his head, trying to remember how he'd fallen asleep and how it was he wasn't being woken up by a nightmare. Almost as soon as he wondered he remembered, Doc had sedated him. Jay frowned and got up from the cot slowly.

He was a little dizzy, but otherwise felt fine, and immediately began checking over Prophet again. Doc had made new notes on his chart. It seemed Prophet, or rather Nathan, Jay noted, was improving. He checked his watch to see how long he'd been asleep for. Eight hours. Felt like he'd been asleep for days, he was still groggy and tired.

He was still looking over the monitors, noting any changes when Doc came in.

"Morning, Jay," he greeted and left the young medic to his work as he checked the iv drips.

Jay frowned at him, "We will be talking about what you did."

Doc took the chart from Jay and snapped it closed, "You want to talk about it? Let's talk about it. What part of not sleeping for a week is okay and healthy or even close to normal? It's not. You need sleep, Jay, eight hours, every day. I don't care when you sleep, as long as you get sleep. If you keep up with this not sleeping thing you've got going on you can be damn sure I'll keep up with the sedatives." Now, you wanna tell me why you haven't been sleeping or are we just gonna pretend that nightmare of yours never happened?"

Jay rolled his eyes and shook his head, "You can't just put someone to sleep like that…"

"I can, I did, and I will do it again," Doc retorted, putting Prophet's chart away before crossing his arms over his chest, "I'll give you a few minutes, if you're not out of here by then I'll do it again."

He left before Jay could argue further.

"I wouldn't test him if I were you, Doc doesn't make idle threats."

Jay jumped at the voice and turned to look at Prophet, "Oh now you wake up?" He shook his head, "Welcome back."

Prophet smiled and chuckled, "What's this about you not sleeping?"

"Oh no you don't. You're not doing any brain picking until you can stand up and move around on your own," Jay refused.

"Is that coming from my doctor or my stubborn and frustrated patient?" Prophet asked curiously.

Jay frowned at him, "I'm not your patient…"

Prophet chuckled, "'Course you are. Everyone on this base is my patient. Of course if you were my patient I couldn't do this."

Jay was in the middle of checking how much morphine Doc had Prophet on when he was pulled down by the sleeve of his scrubs. Jay flinched back when Prophet pressed their lips together. He wanted to run, hide, and disappear, but Prophet still had a hold of his sleeve. Jay pulled back and Prophet looked at him curiously, confused.

"You're not hurt are you?" Prophet asked as he let go of Jay's sleeve.

Jay bolted as soon as he was able, leaving Prophet confused and concerned.

He ran, not really sure where he was going, just trying to force everything out of his mind, focusing just on getting one foot in front of the other as fast as he possibly could. It became easier as he went and became tired, the lack of energy forcing him to focus harder on moving his feet than on Prophet's eyes, the way it felt when… No! Jay shook his head, trying to chase away the thoughts, but in doing so he lost his balance and fell. He felt like he was drowning.

A shadow fell over him as he pushed himself up to his hands and knees. He looked up to see Ghost standing there, looking down at him.

Jay pushed himself up to his feet, "Sir," he greeted with a nod.

"Corporal," Ghost greeted back, "You look like you got a lot on your mind."

"Yes, sir…" Jay saw no point in lying to the Lieutenant, he was a terrible liar, trying would just lead to questions he didn't want to answer.

Ghost gestured to the gym with his head, "C'mon, I need a sparring partner and you got steam to blow and need the training."

Jay nodded, "Sounds good, sir," he agreed and followed the Lieutenant to the gym.

Roach, who had been at the punching bags paused as the pair entered and made their way to the sparring mat. He grinned and followed them over.

"Alright, Corporal, show me what you got," Jay could almost hear the smirk in Ghost's voice, could probably see it if it weren't for that damned mask of his.

Jay got into position hesitantly, Ghost was one of the best fighters the task force had, he had to be crazy to be doing this. He glanced over at their audience of one, who appeared to be doing his best to give him a more reassuring look. Jay rolled his eyes and turned back to Ghost.

He kept his hands up and waited for Ghost to make the first move. He saw the hit coming and thought about the best way to block or avoid it. By the time Jay decided on a course of action the hit connected with his gut and he stumbled back a bit. All of the moves Jay made were too slow to be of any help as Ghost landed hit after hit.

Finally, Jay managed to duck under a swinging fist and his quick mind caught up to the quicker fight and he landed a heavy blow on the Lieutenant's middle. He danced back a couple steps out of Ghost's range, giving himself time to think as Ghost came at him again. He pivoted to the side as Ghost tried to tackle him, throwing him off balance with the unexpected lack of resistance.

"Olè!" Roach laughed from the sideline as Ghost tumbled to the mat.

Ghost sent him a glare as Jay helped him up, "You pack quite a punch, rookie."

Jay shrugged, "I do more strength training than cqc…"

"I can tell," Ghost responded, shifting his weight to one foot, "You're sloppy. You'll never win a real fight, thinking as much as you do."

Jay shrugged again, "My entire job is thinking and planning and considering what happens next and what happens after that and so on."

"So it is," Ghost nodded, "You're gonna have to slow down and not plan so much in a melee fight. It's instinctual, not logical."

Jay nodded, he'd been told the same many times before, but he always found that when he tried he generally stopped being able to think and plan altogether. He rather be able to save a life than win a stupid fight.

"Hey, LT, time for that brief Price asked for," Roach interrupted.

Ghost looked over at him and nodded once. "Keep working on it, Corporal," with that he turned and followed Roach out.

Jay watched them go before moving to the line of punching bags.

He wasn't sure how long he was there, but he worked himself as hard as he could until MacTavish called a briefing. It was dark when Jay left the gym.

He first took note of who was attending the briefing. Both Captains, Ghost, Archer, Roach, Ozone, and… Jay froze, Prophet. There was that drowning feeling again. Jay was sure he should still be resting. How long had he really been training for? But Prophet was there and looked perfectly healthy and alert. Jay wrote off the surprise as his nerves causing him to exaggerate Nath-no, Prophet's injuries and let himself be glad he was okay. Jay shook his head at his thoughts and focused on the briefing. Base, nuclear submarine, eight warheads, disable them and the sub and the base entirely. It seemed simple enough. Jay took a second look at the movement plans and considered them for a moment, making sure no one would be placed in unnecessary danger.

Jay nodded his approval of the plan as MacTavish gave him a curious look. Apparently he'd been asking for said assessment, as the gesture seemed to please him and he went on to call the briefing to a close. He went over the timing once more and made sure everyone understood when they were to head out. Then they were dismissed and Jay headed for the showers, still coated in sweat and grime from his workout.

He stood under the already cold spray long after he finished washing. He was thinking and trying not to. He liked Prophet, he did. But he just couldn't, could he? No, he decided, he could not risk that pain again. He wouldn't be able to take it. Jay resolved that he'd get over it, he simply could not bring himself to try again, not this time. He didn't even know if Na-Prophet had meant what he'd done, he had been completely out of it on pain medication. Jay convinced himself, or rather tried to, that he hadn't meant it, and that the feeling was not mutual. How could it be? Jay had made a conscious effort to push him away at every turn, he was sure Prophet thought he hated him. Jay sighed and turned the water off. He was thinking in circles at this point.

He towel dried his hair and wrapped the towel around his waist as he left the showers and stepped into the locker room. Jay changed into his clean clothes quickly and immediately headed towards his room.

He hesitated at the door. If Prophet was up and around then he'd be back in their shared room too. Jay rolled his eyes at himself and entered the room. Prophet was laying on the bottom bunk, staring up at the bunk above him. He looked over as Jay entered and Jay avoided making eye contact with him. Prophet sighed, silently cursing the drugs he'd been on for making him jump the gun.

"Jay?" Prophet asked.

No answer.

"Jay… we need to figure this out…" Prophet prodded, he was sure Jay wouldn't even let him apologize, he'd been under the influence and out of control of his actions, Jay would realize that and he was too good a person to blame him.

"What's there to figure out?" Jay questioned.

It was a start, "You and me?"

Jay was quiet. He wasn't sure how to respond. Yes he liked Nathan, but he couldn't. Jay didn't think he could manage that kind of relationship again. He couldn't. He was too broken too scared to try again.

He was on the verge of another panic attack when Prophet appeared in front of him and laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Breathe, Jason, it's okay," he assured with a small smile, "I know you're scared."

Jay took a breath, eyes locking with Nathan's as he let the touch on his shoulder ground him. He took another breath, and another. He was okay, he wasn't crumpling to the ground in a fit of panic, fear, and anxiety. He was okay. Maybe… Maybe he would keep being okay.

Jay opened his mouth in a brief moment of courage, "You and me."

Prophet smiled at him, "Thank you, for trusting me. I can't imagine how hard this must be for you."

Jay nodded and touched the hand on his shoulder, "Just… just don't leave. Don't let me get hurt like that again…"

Prophet pulled him into a light hug, "I would never."

Jay leaned into him and they were silent for a long moment, "I'm scared…"

"I know… It'll be alright, I won't let anything happen."

It's a little shorter than I wanted it but I've taken too long. So here ya go. Yeah… That's all I got… Ummm, I feel like there was something I wanted to say, but I can't remember… So I'll leave it at that. Well. Let me know what you think fellas :3

Thanks for Reading, Fly High Aim Higher

~Spitfire out