Alright, so I know I said I was going to update every week, but I'm realizing that is just not going to happen. School work, constant computer problems and writer's block all hate me. I'm not dropping this story and I will still be updating, but I have no idea when those updates are going to come. (Hint: not to bribe you guys or anything, but reviews do motivate me)
I've been spending a lot of my time working on an original story too. Maybe I'll post a bit of it and ask what you guys think once I've got more of it done. Would you guys like that?
Anyway, here's what I've kept you waiting for. Chapter 7 of OBB&SS!
Chapter 7: Meet the Andersons
The Anderson 's second story living room was arguably the most comfortable in the house. It's couches were all plush and inviting, you could easily sink into the chairs and never get up again, the walls were painted a relaxing shade of blue and there was enough room for the entire family to feel comfortable in there.
However, throw in one ten-year-old boy and it seemed the room suddenly ceased being comfortable.
The only Anderson in the room who looked relaxed was Penny, but she was only five, much too young to pick up on the palpable tension in the air. Marissa leaned against one of the walls (despite the fact that there were more than enough seats for everyone), her arms folded and her shoulders hunched in a stance that seemed both hostile and defensive. Donna was wringing her hands, perched nervously on the edge of her seat. Mark was shifting uncomfortably, unable to find a position that let his muscles block out the tension and just relax. Reese was bouncing hyperactively, eager to find out what was going on. Blaine was sitting in a rigid position next to Kurt, clutching the younger boy's hand tightly in his. This might have been because he was trying to comfort the boy or it might have been because Kurt looked ready to bolt at any moment.
Donna was the first to break the silence. "So, Marissa has undoubtedly told all of you about Kurt." She looked at Mark, Reese and Penny for confirmation. Mark nodded, but Reese glared at his sister.
"No. she won't tell us anything. I told you Marissa's mean."
Donna looked in her daughter's direction, but didn't meet her eyes. Her expression should have come been cross, but instead she looked guilty. Marissa looked coldly back. "If you're going to go do stupid stuff without thinking about the rest of us, you can deal with the fallout. Go ahead, tell them what you did." She's merciless, Kurt noted. But Blaine said she was nice. Is this really the same girl? He pondered the thought and then realized dejectedly, Maybe she just doesn't like me. He sank back into the couch and made himself even smaller, if possible. Blaine's hand tightened around his even further. It was nice to know Blaine was trying to make him feel better and Kurt wasn't going to tell him that the vice-like grip was beginning to hurt a little.
Donna turned to her two youngest. Her expression was uncertain and it was obvious she hadn't planned on having to deliver the news herself. Kurt already loved Donna dearly—two years of being depraved of any kind of warmth made her practically an angel in his eyes—but he couldn't help but feel it was a little hypocritical of her to expect Melissa to deliver news she herself didn't want to give. I'm causing so much trouble for them already. I do nothing but make people miserable. Why did I think a new city or a new family would make a difference?
Donna's mouth opened a few times but no sound came out. Finally she cleared her throat and managed, "Kids, I have some, um, big news that I have to tell you." Her statement sounded more like a question.
Reese was bursting with curiosity, completely oblivious to the direction this was heading, but Penny looked at her mother calmly and pointed one thin finger at Kurt. "Is it about him?" Her voice was like wind chimes, smooth and calm. The words sounded like music, but they had an oddly flat sound to them as if Penny was indifferent to the entire situation. She oddly mature and composed for a five year old. Actually, she was oddly composed for anyone in this situation, Kurt noted.
Donna nodded. Now that Penny had addressed the pink elephant in the room—or rather the strange ten-year-old boy cowering into their couch—she seemed to have a little more confidence in her words. She sat up straighter. "Yes, it is. Penny, Reese, I would like you to meet Kurt Anderson." She looked at her children expectantly.
Penny seemed to understand. Her eyes widened a little, but she seemed otherwise unfazed. Her deep blue eyes turned on him appraisingly. Kurt squirmed. Although Penny had inherited her mother's eyes, there was something cold and analytical in hers that Donna's lacked. It unnerved Kurt.
On the other hand, it seemed Donna's subtle message had went right over Reese's head. "That's so cool! Our last name is Anderson too," he informed Kurt. He saw Donna bite her lip.
She spoke again, her voice strained. "Reese, Kurt will be staying with us from now on. I adopted him in Ohio. He's a part of the family now." She put extra emphasis on her last words. "He's your brother now." She searched her son's face anxiously, waiting for a reaction.
Reese has frozen in his bouncing, His eyes widened, his jaw went slack and he slowly turned to look at Kurt in disbelief. "He . . . what?" His voice was much quieter now.
Marissa was wearing a triumphant look on her face, but she still looked more angry and hurt than smug. She glared at her mother. "See? I told you. You never think about us when you do stuff like this. Nobody wants him here."
The second the words left her mouth, Marissa's eyes widened and she snapped her mouth shut as if she could trap them there, but it was too late. A silence fell on the room and it seemed like the silence made the words echo until they were unbearably loud in Kurt's mind.
nobodywantsyouherenobodywantsyouhereNOBODYWANTSYOU HERE
Kurt felt a tremor run through his body. He closed his eyes and tried to take deep breaths, but the breaths that came were short and shallow. His ears rang with the words. He felt like his blood had suddenly been set on fire and his body burned with pain. Things stirred in his mind no matter how hard he tried to hold them down.
"You little fag. Why don't you just die? Everyone would be happier. Nobody wants you here."
It was a lie, right? It had to be a lie.
"What, you thought I loved you? Who could ever love something as disgusting and wrong as you?"
But Donna had said . . .
"Hey, get out of here, princess! Nobody wants to play with you. We'll catch your gay."
No . . .
"Just die already. All you're doing is taking up space. Go on, DO IT!"
Kurt's world went black before the memory was even through.
Kurt's small frame toppled forward as his body went limp. Blaine lunged forward and made a grab for him, barely managing to keep the small boy from falling off the couch. He heaved Kurt back into a sitting position, carefully laying his head back against the cushion. He noted the boy's breathing was quick and shallow, his chest rising and falling rapidly.
Reese looked around at them, wide eyed. Even Penny, who Blaine rarely saw taken by surprise, seemed to be shocked at Kurt's sudden collapse. Her eyes were glued to Kurt's limp form. "What happened?"
Donna stood, her eyes dancing with a million emotions and her mouth drawn into a thin line. "Go to your rooms," she told her two youngest. Her voice was strained and Blaine could hear the worry, anger and sadness she was holding back.
The children looked at each other, neither moving. Mark stood and took their hands. "Come on guys," he said quietly to them, then led them from the room.
Donna passed a hand in front of her face, taking a shaky breath. "Oh, god . . ." She turned to Blaine. Her son saw her gaze slide over Marissa as if the girl wasn't even there. Blaine felt her righteous anger and shared it. Marissa wasn't usually like this. How could she be so callous, so cruel to someone as fragile-looking as Kurt?
Marissa, for her part, looked ashamed and horrified. Her gaze flicked between the three other occupants of the room. Her hand was pressed firmly to her lips like she was trying to prevent any other nasty comments from escaping. Blaine noted her fingers trembled slightly.
Donna placed Marissa at her back, apparently not even wanting to look at her daughter right then. She got down on her knees in front of the couch Blaine and Kurt occupied. She reached out one hand and gently lay her fingers on Kurt's pale cheek in a caress, trance-like. Her eyes were clouded with pity. "You poor boy," she murmured. "What happened to you?"
Blaine wanted to know that too? "What's wrong with Kurt?" he asked, his voice small. Donna's eyes snapped to him, the trance shattered. He saw her eyes clear. She straightened.
"It's alright, honey. He's just fainted." She smoothed Kurt's hair back. "Do want to help me take Kurt to the guest bedroom? I think he'll be asleep for a while." Her voice faltered on the word 'asleep'.
Blaine pretended not to notice. "Okay," he said quietly. Donna nodded and gathered Kurt up in her arms. She stood, as did Blaine. Together they headed for the hallway.
As they made their way to the door, Donna passed right in front of Marissa. The girl reached out a hand to lay on Donna's arm. "Mom," she choked. "I—"
Donna shrugged of the hand and glared coldly at her daughter. There was no forgiveness or understanding in her eyes like there usually was. A line had been crossed that even Donna wouldn't put up with. Without a word, she passed Marissa and swept her way into hallway. Marissa met Blaine's gaze, her eyes begging him to say something. He was only able to hold her gaze for a moment before looking away and following his mother out of the room.
Kurt awoke in an unfamiliar bed and for a second his heart raced in panic. Then the day's events started to slowly come back and he the tension left his body. He slumped into the bed, feeling defeated.
The Andersons didn't like him, that much was clear. Sure, Donna and Blaine liked him. He didn't really know what to make of Mark or Reese. Penny's disdain for him was obvious. But what had really shaken him was Marissa's undiluted hatred.
His small body began to tremble. She hated him already and none of them even knew the worst part yet. None of them knew what he was, how volatile and disgusting and wrong he was. They didn't know and still Marissa hated him. Was he really so unlikable? Or could she tell what he really was?
He saw an image. It was his reflection, only in the mirror he was wearing a baggy t-shirt bearing some lame fishing slogan, a pair of dirty jeans that hung limply on his skinny frame and sneakers. His hair was messy and tousled like he hadn't even bother to run a comb through it.
"It doesn't matter how you dress, freak. Everyone will always know what you are."
He thought Donna and Blaine wanted to help him. But how was bringing here with someone who obviously hated him helping?
"I tried helping you. Why do you think I'm so rough on you? I was trying to help you get better. But you just refused to be helped, you worthless little piece of shit."
StopitstopitstopitstopitSTOPIT! But the memories wouldn't listen and Kurt heard them anyway.
"No one will ever want you. How could anyone ever want something so . . . broken?"
Kurt curled into a ball. In this house full of people, he felt just as alone as he always had. Kurt heard the coarse voice speak the words and he knew without a doubt that they were true. Already he was ruining things for these people. They'd would all realize that soon enough, even Donna and—Kurt gulped—Blaine. He whimpered and hugged himself tighter, trying to find a warmth that wasn't there. Daddy hadn't been wrong about this, at least.
He was broken. Who would ever want him now?
Whew. Getting a little heavy there. Yeah, so Kurt is pretty scarred by what's happened to him in the past few years. I feel bad for hurting the little guy, but like the authors of an amazing story called And Innocents said, it's called hurt/comfort because you have to hurt them before you can comfort them. I know the middle of this chapter sucks, but it would NOT let itself be written and this is the best I can do.
You know the drill. R&R, please!
