A/N another very obvious chapter name, I seem to be good at that. I need more obscure chapter names like "the first" or "the girl who cried wolf" (horrible name lol) or even … oh I give up :P…. Maybe another time…. ANYWAY enough of my rambling onto the chapter. Woot.
A chill hung in the air, despite the warm day as he descended the constantly moving staircase. Nobody else he passed seemed to notice this chill but Remus, whose limbs felt as taunt as the stone gryphons that guarded the doorway to the headmaster's office. The paintings lining the staircase's stone wall seemed to have stopped what they had been doing (which wasn't much to begin with) to watch him as he followed fiery head that shinned like a warning beacon ahead of him, walking with a purposeful stride. Lily. He cringed mentally. Maybe she does know…. No that's stupid. Dismissing it almost immediately. She wouldn't even be talking to him if she knew…. knew about that. He subconsciously pulled at his sleeved again as he shuddered inwardly at the implications of thought. Remus could imagine the letters that would be sent out to horrified parents who would demand his expulsion at once. Everything that Dumbledore had done for him would crumble- he could even see his headmaster's face now looking sadly at him through his half-moon spectacles piercing him with the question of his betrayal of trust?
How could he have slipped up?
Remus gulped as she approached him.
He tried to read her face for any clues as to what she was about to ask him- he could find no sign of disgust in her face, in fact it was completely passive. Damn. That means she could be worried or disgusted or even possibly… "Hi Remus?" Remus jumped he'd been so intent on his own thoughts that he had forgot where he was and nearly bumped into Lily. He cursed under his breath for acting like such a jerk.
"Are you okay?" she asked, her face plastered with worry. Act relaxed, you've done nothing wrong. He tried to reason with himself. " I'm fine." He said in a slightly squeaky voice. Lily ignored this and got straight to the point.
"um… anyway, I wanted to ask you about this potions essay, I a little stuck and…" Remus breathed a sigh of relief, he had worried over nothing. "and yeah I kind of didn't want to sound stupid because potions is my best subject and I'd thought you'd understand and all." By this point Lily looked a bit flustered and sheepish. "Um," Remus stammered caught completely off guard, "sure, no problem." His heart seemed to be doing a little victory dance, rising from the pits of his stomach where it had wedged itself in worry. "Do you want to have a look over it in the library?" he asked pointing subconsciously in the general direction. "Sure." She agreed looking passive again. Remus started to worry again as they walked silently to the cavernous library, trying to avoid Madame Pince glare that she especially reserved for first year's so called 'filthy hands'. They sunk in to rather comfy worn leather chairs at a table as Lily started to unpack her books and quill and a rather large piece of parchment that was already filled with miniscule writing. Remus waited patiently- arm resting on the top of the table- wondering what she was having trouble with, Lily was right it was one of her best subjects, she really had trouble with any homework save defense against the dark arts. She wasn't exactly bad at it, in fact she was probably better than most. However it was the only subject she truly 'struggled' in- in a Lily sense of the word. Remus hadn't noticed, but he had started staring off into space again. "Remus, Remus… REMUS!" She hissed as loud as she dared. "What?" he said stupidly, his cheeks flushing. "You've been really out of it today." She stated, "are you sure your ok? I am your friend you know." Her face actually showed true concern. He felt guilty for doubting her. She probably really did need his help and he'd been stupid to think otherwise, he had unthinkingly condemmed her actions before he'd even heard what she had to say. In fact he was exceedingly lucky she had been so patient with him. "So what do you need help with?" he said trying to desperately change the subject. "well that's the thing you see I actually don't need help…its well…" she decided not to finish her sentence, remus was about to ask her to continue still feeling guilty that he'd acted like such a jerk so far.
However his guilt was removed with what she did next. She took his hand that was lying on top of the table. It all happened in one swift movement, she gripped his hand and tugged his sleeve up revealing the newly cut scars. He panicked, surely he could talk his way out of this, she'd probably noticed the way he tugged absent mindedly at his sleeve- in fact she probably hadn't even considered werewolves, maybe she thought that they were self inflicted. Which they were, but not consciously. Either way the second option was just as bad as the first. If she didn't think he was horrible, she'd think him mental and unstable. Though as if in a role reversal she wasn't paying attention to him she seemed to be trying to put something together. " Haha, you seemed to notice my um… cuts, I'm really clumsy you see, and the other day I slipped and well…" Remus tried to act casually adding in some fake laughs, but Lily cut him off. "I know Remus…. or well I assumed." She said looking at him intensely. She glanced around carefully. This made Remus gulp again. She couldn't- could she? His worst fears were confirmed this was it she was about to tell him they could never be friends; that she can't believe she made friends with such a nightmare. "You're a werewolf aren't you?" She whispered so slightly that if Remus hadn't known what was coming nor for his keen hearing would he have heard what she was on about. He nodded slightly gritting his teeth in agony. "Remus, I'm so sorry.." she said with a look of sadness on her face, he looked away before he saw the sadness turn to horror. "That what!? I'm a Werewolf?" he hissed loudly. "Its not my fault, and I'm sorry that I didn't turn out to be the person you hoped I was." He said furiously, "Its not my fault I'm…I'm a monster." A silent tear streaked down his face, this was it he was going to be ratted out kicked out of Hogwarts a month into his first year. He could imagine the disappointed looks on his parent's faces as he returned home a further disgrace to his family. "I don't care." She said just as fiercely back. "From what I know about you, you're a good person. I just wanted to be there for you like any friend. I know what its like to be called a freak." She drew in breath quickly. "my own sister called me one everyday until I left for Hogwarts, in fact I might've not come hadn't been for Severus." She said, putting extra emphasis on his name. Remus shuddered slightly at this. He still loathed the slimy git. " What I mean to say is if Dumbledore let you come to Hogwarts, then you must be fine, in fact even if Dumbledore hadn't welcomed you in I would still be your friend." She said. still after all the this time holding his hand hard- so hard in fact he could feel his fingers going numb.
But he didn't care. Someone accepted him, which was all that mattered; in fact Remus would've been happy even if she wasn't his friend. "Though…" Lily added thoughtfully afterward. "I can't say that I'll ever get along with Potter and his group." That did it, Remus couldn't help himself- he laughed quite loudly. Relief washed over him that her only problem with him was the group he hanged out with- it was laughable indeed. In fact Madame Pince lurked around the corner giving him a disapproving look and hushing him in her shrill voice. Lily smiled. Remus felt elated. The year didn't look too bad after all. Maybe he would even consider telling James and Sirius and Peter….
* * * *
A/N Mwhaha so I left you on a kind cliffhanger, will young Remy tell the rest of the Marauders or will they find out before he has a chance to? Find out next chapter. :D
Btw we are coming close to the end of Remus story and we will then delve into one of the others. Anyways I hope you enjoyed the chapter.
