A/N: That update took forever, but here it is!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. The song is Icon For Hire's Sugar and Spice

Sometimes I say really dumb things

'Cause it's hard to talk and at the same time think

At the same time, I feel like I should have that down,

I should've figured out the conversation by now

There's a lot of time wasted hating the way I act,

Social skills I'm not sure I have

The list of what's wrong runs way too long

And I had no idea 'til you came along


"GOD DAMMIT"

I screamed my frustration about five days later. A rumble of displeasure started to vibrate the back of my throat. Snapping the orange book shut I looked up to see Jiraiya-bastard walking along like he never heard me.

Pinching the bridge of my nose I resisted the urge to hurl the book at the back of his didn't take a genius to figure out he wrote the damn thing. All of his talk about research and women lined up perfectly with some of the scandalously written scenes. As a whole the storyline was pretty good though.

Reading this damn book had been a pain in the ass. I lacked the will to put the stupid thing down. Stupid-face insisted on setting a blistering pace back to Konoha. Let me tell you how hard it is to fully appreciate a book while running and jumping from tree limb to tree limb. Most of my reading was done when he fell asleep or wandered off to do whatever the hell it was he did.

Mercifully my benevolent guide let us walk the last hour of our trip. I didn't even realize where we were until I shut the book. When I stopped rubbing my eyes I found myself staring at the tall gates that led to the entrance of what could only be Konoha. Traveling with Kaa-chan let me see a lot of weird places in my time. A low whistle escaped my lips as I craned my head back. Never had I seen something that well structurally enormous.

Look at me using big words.

No, but really, not only was the wall tall as hell, but the green gates were quite imposing as well. Seriously, how did they open and shut those things in a timely fashion? Moving those monsters had to take a lot of people. Well maybe if there was a special justu they cou-

"Pick it up Miyako. We got places to be."

Oh this sonovabitch was starting this again.

"OI! Don't walk off without me you bastard." scowling I jogged through the archway. He had paused in front of this weird looking hutt-bench-desk thing. Hands in his pocket he turned to look at me. Jerk was grinning and all.

"Stop your whining. The sooner we get you registered the sooner I can go see my Mikki-chan." his eyes got sparkly. Irritation and just the smallest bit of amusement blossomed in my chest. Mostly irritation. Irritation that I was irritated he was after women who were not Kaa-chan. Why did I even care?

"Strippers this early in the day? Lech." I grumbled. Then my brain caught onto his previous statement. "WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT REGISTERING?!"

"Wow, this one has a temper. So you like them feisty and young Jiraiya-san? Sure you can handle her?" a new voice entered the conversation. I spun around to find two males staring at me. One had a bandage across the middle of his face. The other had a mop of hair that covered one eye.

"Maybe we shouldn't get in the middle of this?" one eye said. Bandage guy was grinning like he had finally received some entertainment.

"Handle me?" I scoffed. Running a hand through my short hair I cocked my hip to the side just a bit. Huffing I crossed my arms just under my chest. Mustering the most disgustingly sweet voice I continued "And you think you could do a better job? Show me a good time?"

"Don't answer that." gone was the sparkle from my bastard father's eye. He actually looked serious as he glowered at bandage guy. Hands seized my shoulders and spun me away from the males. "Now that we are definitely done with that… Lets get moving."

He really does pick the weirdest times to be weird.

I was totally going to tear into that guy.


Two hours later and a lot of paperwork later I was incredibly grumpy. Bastard-baka gave me some money after I pestered him. I'm pretty sure he was sick of hearing me whine and cry about being bored. Aggravating him for some money to go do something wasn't that hard. He was about as sick of my presence as I was his. Granted, he would probably coming looking for me again.

Until that point and time I would be enjoying my freedom. The first thing I did was dropped by the book store. I almost didn't convince the book keeper to sell me the second and third books in the Icha Icha series. To be fair I think the girl was too embarrassed to say anything. The moment I slapped the books on the counter she flushed a deep red and all but shoved me out of her book store.

Seeing as I had no idea where to go I just wandered aimlessly with my nose in the book. Again, I wasn't a fast reader. In a few hours I was only able to make it through a couple of chapters. By the time I looked up and blinked the sun was starting to sink in the sky. Warm orange and red light became hazy. Feeling rather content I found myself a nice tree. Reaching my hands up I stretched the kind of stretch that brought you onto your toes. Then I dropped to my ass and leaned against the tree.

Closing my eyes I let myself start to slip into a nice relaxed state. I kept myself aware enough to recognize any danger. Even in the heart of one of the safest villages I was not about to die because I got complacent. Out of habit I balled my chakra up as tight as possible to make sure no wandering idiot took notice of me. Might as well get some sleep while I can. Jiraiya-bastard would probably get himself too wasted to check us into any kind of hotel.

Muscles started to relax. For the first time since we left the last village I started to assess myself. Cutting my silvery white hair short had been good foresight. I hadn't bathed in days. Only the god know how much of a mess that would have been. Dirt and dried sweat made my skin itch. I needed to wash my clothes. No.. I needed new clothes. I'd been wearing the same pair since I left…

Well…

Yeah…

The more I started to think about the trivial things the heavier my mind seem to get. On my hip the weapon holsters felt light. No doubt they were running low. Wiggling my toes I felt the slight scratch of fraying leather. New shoes. I needed new shoes and new clothing. So much to do.

"Excuse me? Are you okay?"

Holyshitholyshitholyshitholyshitholyshit

Snapping my eyes open I found myself looking into an unfamiliar face. The sun had completely disappeared at this point. Had I really been sitting here that long? It only felt like a few minutes! More importantly… When did this guy get here!? Blinking rapidly I did my best to clear my eyes of the nap induced fog they had accumulated. Curious black eyes peered at me, and I did my best to play it cool.

"Eh? Yeah. Just fell asleep I guess." I don't think I'd be offended if he thought me some homeless vagrant. One, I definitely looked the part. Two, I technically was a homeless vagrant.

"It's not a good idea to just sleep in the open like this. Especially for a young lady." he was being friendly enough, but those words irritated me. He dressed like a lot of the Konoha-nin I had seen wandering around. Deep down a voice started screaming that I should kick his ass. Instead I sighed and put on the best smile I could muster.

"I think I can take care of myself, but thank you for your concern." he offered me a hand when I moved to stand up. Pausing I looked at his hand and then pushed it aside.

I don't need help.

I'm not just some weak girl.

Awkwardly the nin took a step back. His offered hand went back to his side. Straightening my spine I did my best to look tall. At least he wasn't that much taller. He only had a few inches on me. Staring at him I took in the little details. He didn't look like most of the other nin I saw wandering around. Sure he had the same green jacket with that weird long sleeve. A red swirly circle sat on his shoulder. The long sleeve came up his neck and over his chin. Instead of a simple forehead protector tied around his head he had a face plate… thing. I cocked my head to the side a minute as one thought occurred to me.

How did he not die of a heat stroke?

Konoha was in the Land of Fire. Now, that wasn't just a random ass name. The Land of Fire was hot. Not the beach kind of hot where you got nice breezes and lots of storms. No, this was the humid drink the air as soup kind of hot. I personally was wearing shorts and a tank top. Wraps covered my biceps and thighs, but aside from that I really didn't have much on.

Which was SMART.

Cause you know…

It's hot as balls.

"So what brings you to our village?" he asked keeping his tone casual. Running a hand through my grungy feeling hair I resisted the urge to sigh.

"A bath now that I think of it." my new friend coughed uncomfortably. Eyes widened a fraction on his part. Jeez it's not like I had asked me to join or anything. Why do guys automatically have to think of things like that? All perverts. Speaking of perverts.. "I'm going to kill him.."

"What?!" oh right.. There was some one with me.

"Uh, can you point me towards…" I tried to remember the name of the place. "Paper House… Blossoming… Uhhh.. Paper Blossom Tea House?"

"Why in the world would you want to go there?" his nostrils flared a bit. "Do you work there?"

"No. Stop. Dear god no." I held a hand up and waved it like I was trying to disperse the idea. "My idiot fath… nope.. not ready for that… For the sake of my pride we're gonna call him The Idiot. The Idiot said he would be spending his time there. I need to find him before he gets to trashed or .. how did he put it.. 'lost in Mikki-chan's loving bosom'."

"Are we talking about the same person you're going to kill?" he looked confused as hell. Which was fair enough.

"Uh… yeah. I was just joking about that. I'm not going to actually kill him. At least not right now. He's annoying but he's not that annoying. No, that's a lie he is that annoying." the word vomit wouldn't stop. What the hell was wrong with me? My social skills were definitely better than this.

"So you're not from around here." this time it was a statement and not a question. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Nope. Uh.. I'm registered though. I didn't get to talk to the Hokage. The Idiot said it was a bad idea. He needed to talk to her first. I don't know. I really just need to be clean. Food would be nice.." more rambling. "What time is it anyway?"

"Close to 4:30 in the morning." I groaned at that. This was just great. That stupid bastard just left me to do whatever. Never came looking for me. Wasn't worried if I'd eaten. Stupid man. How was I supposed to know where he even was!

"Miss.."

Him and his stupid research

"Miss.."

He's lucky he writes mediocre books.

"Miss."

Fingers snapped in front of my green eyes. Blinking a few times I looked back up at the strange nin. Silence passed between us for a solid minute. Then my stomach growled rather loudly. At this point I decided I could just die. The older nin smiled and my cheeks heated just a bit.

"I'm going to go hide in shame now." I muttered. That caused him to chuckle.

"I don't think you should be thinking about… the 'Tea House'. Breakfast would probably be the best place to start." he seemed really uncomfortable when it came to talking about the 'Tea House'. Why did we even call it that. Was a brothel really that scandalous?

"I don't have any money." I stated simply, but part of me wanted to whine.

"Yeah, yeah. Just promise to pay me back later, okay?" the hospitality seemed to come naturally. I felt myself jerk just a bit. No one just gave anything for free. Hairs stood up on my arms. Narrowing my gaze I looked very intently into his eyes, searching for some kind of deception.

Was he going to poison me?

Beat me up?

"Just breakfast I promise! No catch. No nothing." he put his hands up in a defensive manner. He didn't look much older than me so there was a chance that I could beat him in a fight. I was on his home turf though. I just needed to be careful.

"Okay… I'm Midori by the way."

"Yamato. Nice to meet you."