Chapter VIII
AN: I do not own the rights to the world of Harry Potter and its characters.
Some characters may seem extremely out of character – especially Ron Weasley seeing as I believe he would never in his right mind abuse Hermione in any way. Also, dates and ages have been altered for narrative purposes (especially when it comes to the children)
Song Recommendation: Beating Heart by Ellie Goulding
Sparks flew as their lips connected for the very first time, jolts of electricity traversed his body, from the very tips of his fingers all the way down to his toes. He was on fire, her lips against his, his hands on her skin. "Severus." She mumbled against his lips, pulling his hair back –he groaned at the immediate loss of contact.
"What is it?" He pressed nervously, his eyes scanning her face for any sense of regret, fear or better yet disgust –her eyes instead shone brightly and her lips were slightly swollen.
She leaned up high on her tippy toes and pressed a soft and gentle kiss against the angry scar on his neck. "I just want to know what it feels like."
"What what feels like?" He asked looking down at her face as she nestled her head in the crook of his neck. He frowned as her body began to tremble like a leaf in his embrace. He closed his eyes and rested his chin atop her head, rubbing soothing circles on her back. He shivered as she continued to pepper soft kisses on his neck
"I just wanna know what it feels like to be loved." She openly sobbed into the material of his shirt –her whole body quivered beneath his touch.
Without giving it much thought he leaned down and grabbed her from underneath her thighs, pulling her in his strong arms –her legs immediately wrapped themselves around his waist, her arms around his neck. She took a deep breath, threading her fingers through his dark locks, massaging his head with the tips of her fingers –she tilted his head back until their eyes met. Neither spoke as her lips slowly descended onto his once more –the beating of her heart pounding through her head as she pushed her tongue past his closed lips.
He slowly made his way out of the kitchen towards his bedroom –pausing before the closed door he pulled his lips away from hers, taking the time to observe her face: her cheeks were flushed, her dark brown eyes swam with tears, her bottom lip caught between her lips. "Oh, Hermione." He muttered sadly as the door clicked open. He marched through the doorway –the door closing behind them swiftly. He slowly walked towards the edge of the bed and carefully placed her upon the soft duvet –taking a moment to bask in her beauty as she laid sprawled on his bed, her brown tresses creating a halo around her head. "You're so beautiful." He whispered darkly.
"Please, Severus." She mumbled sadly as she grabbed his hand, pulling him down to her. He collapsed against her petite body, their faces mere inches away from each other; he kissed each flushed cheek lovingly before rolling off her body, laying himself down next to her. She was still hurting, and despite the incredible tightness in his trousers, he had to be the rational one. "I need you." She begged as she rolled on top of him, one leg on each side of his body –he gasped as she teasingly rubbed herself against him. Her nimble fingers immediately began undoing the buttons of his shirt, exposing his scarred chest one button at a time.
"Hermione you have to stop." He muttered breathlessly as her nails raked down his chest.
"But you want this I know you do." She muttered as she cupped his bulge through his trousers –a guttural moan escaped his lips as his lids fluttered shut. "I can make you feel better."
His eyes snapped open as he felt her hands at his belt buckle, he quickly grabbed her hips, his fingers molding into her skin and before she could protest he had flipped them around: she was now on her back and he was over her, pinning her down softly. "Hermione." He said her name loudly. "Hermione stop. You do not need to make me feel better." He explained delicately.
Hermione looked up at the man above her –the sharp features of his face came into focus. His large hands pinning her wrists above her head. "But…"
"No buts. I am not Ronald. I will never force you into doing something you don't want to do." He muttered sadly as a lone tear rolled down her cheek. "You have no idea how much I want this –but we can't. You're still married, your two kids are in the bedroom next door, but the most important reason to not do this is simply that you aren't ready."
Her bottom lip began to tremble, as she closed her eyes tightly shut. "I'm sorry." She whispered quietly, not wanting to look at his face –he was disappointed, she could hear it in his voice, but he was right in every single way. Kissing him had been explosive and she wanted nothing more then to push her lips against his once more; however, she knew that it wasn't right, not only for Ron, her kids and herself but also for Severus. She was placing him in this situation and it was totally and utterly unfair.
"Please don't be sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for, I'm the one who initiated it." He said as his fingertips slowly began trailing down the length of her arms, leaving goosebumps in its wake. "I clearly wasn't being rational."
He slowly rolled off of her body, she scooted to the side allowing him to lay down next to her. "Can I ask you a favor." She whispered quietly, her gaze transfixed on the ceiling fan above them.
"You can ask me anything." He responded, turning his head in order to get a better closer look at her face.
She, in turn, turned her head to look at him. "Can you hold me? Ron was never much into cuddling." His warm eyes bore into her own, a small smile formed on his face. "You don't have too if you don't want too." She babbled nervously as she turned her head back to look at the ceiling fan.
He had never been into cuddling himself, perhaps it was because he had never felt the desire to cuddle with anybody had shared a bed with, but this was different –she looked so sad and lost, she needed a strong hold to keep her warm. "Come here." He mumbled as his hands found her skin.
She smiled to herself as she scooted into his embrace. She sighed in content as she placed her head on his chest, she slowly brought her finger up to his chest –which was still in plain view. He sighed happily as she began mapping out the various scars that outlined his chest with the tip of her pointer finger. "Thank you for everything Severus." She whispered quietly as she snuggled closer to him –her eyes fluttered closed as she dug herself into his side.
He didn't respond, instead, he simply leaned down and kissed her forehead.
She smiled at the tender gesture –wishing deep down that there was a way out, but she knew that there wasn't. She wished that she could just remain here, in the warmth comfort of his arms, but he was right, she was still married and she had to think of her children –they came first. She lifted her head off his chest as his breathing steadied. "Oh, Severus." She whispered as she pushed a stray dark lock away from his face. "I'm so sorry." She mumbled sadly as she rested her head back upon his chest –she closed her eyes as sleep overtook her; not one nightmare plagued her sleep that night; not one nightmare plagued his sleep either. For once in a long time, Severus was at peace, he had something worth fighting for –he would help her in every way possible and then he would give her the world.
The sunlight shone down brightly upon the sleeping man –he groaned as he buried his head into his pillow. He slowly stretched his fingertips across the sheets, looking for that warm skin that had been pressed against his own skin the whole night. He lifted his head off the pillow in a frenzy –she wasn't lying next to him. He quickly sat up, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he glanced around the room: looking for any sign of the young Muggleborn witch.
His eyes landed on a lone piece of paper that had been placed on the dresser, his heart plummeted to his stomach as he shuffled out of bed, ignoring the sore muscles of his back. He grabbed the piece of paper in both hands his heart clenching painfully. It was a drawing –drawn by none other than Rose, something made evident by her neatly printed name in the corner of the page. In the middle of the drawing were three figures and a small blob: one of the figures had jet black shoulder length hair, the second one had long brown hair and the final figure who was much smaller than the other ones had flaming red hair.
Tears pricked the corner of his eyes as he dashed out of the room, still holding the drawing in his clenched hand. "Hermione!" He yelled loudly as he burst into the guest bedroom –the room she had occupied for the past few days. The baby blue crib was gone, so was all traces that this room had been occupied by Hermione and her two children. The bed was neatly made –seemingly having been untouched for days. She was gone.
He staggered backward against the wall, as he glanced down at the drawing in his hand. He had allowed himself to be vulnerable, he had let her in, not only in his home but in his heart. He clenched his teeth menacingly as he stormed out of the room. He had known this would happen, but he had allowed it to happen anyways. "Stupid bloody Gryffindor's." He muttered angrily as he walked towards his laboratory. Love was a sign of weakness –it had been the case with Lily Evens decades ago and he had let it happen again with Hermione. This time around, though, the pain was worst because he had also grown particularly attached to her two children.
He looked down at the bubbling potion, glaring at its contents intensively. He dropped the drawing to the ground and with all his might tipped the cauldron over, its entire contents spilling onto the hardwood flooring. "She can get herself pregnant again for all I bloody care." He spat bitterly. He watched as the drawing shriveled up as the piece of paper soaked up the amber concoction.
He stalked out of the room once more and headed towards his bedroom. Launching himself towards the bed he quickly began ripping off the bedsheets –he needed to get rid of her odor; that deliciously smell of strawberries and cream, that particular sweet scent that sent tingles down his body. Once the bed was stripped bare he collapsed against the mattress, staring up at the ceiling fan above his head. He scoffed loudly –she wanted to feel loved yet here she was going back to her abusive husband who didn't give two shits about her. "I could have given you the world." He muttered to himself as he closed his eyes –his head was pounding, his heart beating out of his chest – he hated her, hated her for making him feel this way, hated her for making him fall in love with her children. But worst of all he hated himself, hated himself for allowing himself to feel this way for her, hated himself for aiding her in the first place.
Hermione took a deep breath as her hand clenched around her daughter's hand, Hugo was nestled in her arms, thankfully he was asleep, his little chubby cheek pressed against the warm skin of her neck. "Are we gonna see Mr. Snape again mummy?" Rose asked curiously as she followed Hermione towards the front entrance of their home.
"I don't know sweetheart," Hermione mumbled sadly as she paused before the closed door. "But you're gonna see daddy." Rose nodded happily –Hermione felt nauseous, she wished she could feel as happy at the thought of seeing her husband but that sadly wasn't the case. "Now remember the rule sweetheart."
"We were at Aunt Jennies house," Rose said seriously as she looked up towards her mother.
"Good girl, now come on let's go." Hermione cautiously twisted the doorknob, pushing it open. The familiar warm air overwhelmed her as she walked in –followed closely by Rose who pushed the door shut behind them. Hermione took a shaky breath as she looked around the house. "Ron?" She didn't realize how badly her body was shaking, she was terrified –terrified of his reaction.
Leaving the comfort of Severus's bed that morning had been one of the hardest decisions she had ever made, he had looked so peaceful and content. She smiled sadly at the thought of his arms wrapped around her body –she pushed the thought aside, she had to stop thinking about him, she had too.
"Hermione?" Her eyes snapped up towards the stairwell, Ron stood frozen on the last step.
"Daddy!" Rose exclaimed excitedly as she ran towards her father, crumbling into his embrace.
"Hey, Ron."
Please don't kill me! I know I know Hermione is a dumb, and also I know that whole kiss and everything that came afterward was way too soon but hopefully, I managed to convey the particular feelings I wanted to express during that section. Say goodbye to the awesome Severus and Hermione dynamic -for now at least. As always thank you to everybody for following, favoriting and reviewing, once again I got such great responses and I'm glad you all enjoyed the last chapter! I just wanted to respond to one particular guest review that I got that basically said that Hermione was hiding instead of facing her problems and also how she just went and kissed her 'savior' and how unrealistic it was: well, first of all I'm sorry you feel this way because I think that for someone who has been abused and unloved for years Hermione has every right to be hiding out facing this situation, and as for her and Severus's feelings towards each other, the kiss and everything that happened after was not rational behavior -ones emotions often make people do stupid things and they both realized that before anything worse could happen!
Also to Natalie: Rose was born roughly a year after they lost the baby, Ron wanted a baby really badly and well we know how that went -also sorry I didn't combine your review but I was on my phone meaning I couldn't physically edit it!
and also lovethelab: I'm glad I managed to handle the situation properly! Thanks for letting me know!
Shout out to Blue night fairy for being the 100th reviewer
Last note I promise! Please go check out my new story Loving Hermione Granger! Go check it out and let me know what you all thought!
As always thank you to all of you for following this story I love you all so much and I will see you guys soon!
Penny x
