A Strange Adventure 8: Arthur vs. My Little Pony

By NocturneD

note: warning crude and tasteless humor ahead.
-

Chapter 8

Arthur kicked Binky in the nads first then when he got to class because the over sized galloot made fun of his yellow sweater. Arthur had enough of his shit and challenged Binky to a fight in the classroom. Mr. Ratburn pretty much had enough of teaching his class anything anymore so he told the kids to use their desks to make a huge circle to make a fighting ring. Arthur took off his shirt and turned out to be pretty ripped for an eight year old. Binky on the other hand was a fat slob, everyone told him to put his shirt back on. Arthur put on his two because he was attracting attention from the girls... well, some passing female ponies from outside as well.

"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" The class mates hollered.

Arthur started it off by punching Binky in the cheek. Binky returned the favor. Arthur kicked. Binky back handed Arthur. Arthur swung. Binky threw another punch. Arthur did as well. The fight continued for another twenty minutes. It was the most epic fight in history. If I were to repeat this to you. You would squeal in delight. Binky looked like he had the upper hand at first until Arthur reversed it. He kicked Binky in the stomach and gave him a Stone Cold Stunner. The force was so hard it caused Binky to fall out of the ring. There was blood everywhere and the smell in the air. It smelled like manliness.

"WE HAVE A WINNER!" Brain raised Arthur's hand.

"ARTHUR! ARTHUR! ARTHUR!" The classmates chanted.

"Oh Arthur! I saw everything! You fought so bravely!" Twilight Sparkle appeared behind him and gave him a hug.

"Yeah I'm just that awesome!" Arthur flexed with Twilight still hanging onto him.

"Make love to me right here in the classroom!" Twilight moaned.

Arthur frowned, "Right here? In front of everyone?"

"Yes! On top of Binky's bruised and battered body!" Twilight smiled.

Arthur shrugged his shoulders, "Alright..."

Arthur and Twilight were about to kiss until...

"Hey Arthur!" Buster shouted.

Arthur was making a funny face at the moment. The other kids laughed at him.

"Up for some baseball?" Francine asked.

Arthur blushed, "Yeah sure..." He stopped, "Wait was there a fight earlier today?"

"A fight between who?" Francine asked.

"Uh... sorry I think it was something else." Arthur frowned. "Think I'll take a raincheck on that baseball game guys." He turned around and left, kicking a nearby rock in disappointment.

He walked home and went straight to his room. "Wait... there's still the wedding."

Meanwhile in Equestria.

A green chubby unicorn raised his hoof, "Can I go the bathroom?"

Cheerilee rubbed her face with her hooves, tired of the same question, "Snips... for the last time... we go before and after class."

"Ah christ how does anypony do it?" Snips waved his arms around.

Cheerilee shook off the nagging feeling and wanted to make an announcement, "Children as you know the royal wedding is coming up and we're going to have a new king. A marriage formed as a peace treaty, some of you might know that as to tie two factions together."

"Is he gay?" Sweetie Belle raised her hoof.

"Well he was a nudist at one point. But he did kill a lot of zombies and trained to be a ninja..." Cheerilee trailed off.

"A nudist zombie killing ninja?" Scootaloo raised an eyebrow.

"Just a zombie killing ninja now." Cheerilee assured.

"I welcome our new king then!" Scootaloo praised.

Meanwhile back in Elwood City. Mr. Ratburn was going over the legal papers to see if he could marry a horse. Apparently in Elwood city, everyone was half animal anyway so why does it matter?

Just then. The Ratburn signal could be seen in the sky.

"My gawd... It's the Ratburn signal!" Ratburn stood up from his desk. He pushed a button inside the desk drawer. A wall opened up behind him and revealed a pole. He hopped on it and slid down.

to be continued..