A/N Happy New Year everyone! Sorry again for these late updates but I come with the longest chapter I've ever written so far. :D

Chapter 8

An hour later they were both in the car and on the way to the hospital.

"I'm too old to be having a hangover" Beckett joked.

"Really? I was kind of hoping we'd do a repeat of that, only I'll be as drunk as you."

"Not a chance, Castle." She shot him a mocked glare.

"Why Detective? Afraid something really might happen?" Castle teased, as a smirk played across his lips.

"You might lose the little," She began putting strong emphasis on 'little', "self-control you have" She glanced back at Castle matching the smirk on his face, "and believe me, you and me and a bottle of scotch, you will lose it."

"Okay fine, sober's good too." Before Beckett had the chance to reply, Castle spoke up again. "So tonight, then? I'll come by around 6?"

Beckett laughed. "Yeah! Let's do it!" She answered jokingly.

An ambulance then zoomed past them with its siren wailing. Castle glanced at Beckett and caught her face fall.

She chewed on her lip and felt Castle's eyes on her. "My dad needs a heart transplant." She told him.

"I'm sorry to hear that." It wasn't any less disheartening the second time around.

"I'm not even sure if he made it on the donor list. They have some rule about alcoholics."

"An alcoholic needs only to be sober at least a year to make it to the donor list. He's eligible."

Beckett sighed in relief for a moment but then her expression turned sour. "Even then. There must be at least a dozen people above him. What if he doesn't make it till then?" Beckett tried to keep it together, but her voice broke.

Castle took his hand from the gearstick and took Beckett's and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "I don't know what's going to happen. But we'll get through this."

We? The thought couldn't help but linger in Kate's mind. It was comforting to know that he was there for her. She tried to smile. "I should really find a way to make it up to you for all this."

"You don't owe me anything, Kate." Castle let the name slip and was suddenly worried about how she'd react.

"But then I want to." Kate smiled genuinely, not only because she was grateful, but also because she loved the way Castle said her first name.

Castle steered the car toward the parking lot when they entered hospital gates.

"I thought you said you were just going to drop me off?" She didn't want him to go but felt it was appropriate to ask.

"Did I say that?" Castle put the gears into reverse and eased into an open parking space. "Nah, I'd rather just stay."

"What about your 3rd book?"

"It's coming together nicely, I've got bits to add here and there, but that's why I brought my laptop along." He reached for his bag in the backseat. "Let's go."

They took the elevator to the ICU. It made a lot of stops as people kept coming in and out. It took the pair a while to reach their desired floor. Castle noticed the anxious look on Beckett's face. He side-stepped closer and put his hand on her shoulder. "You okay?"

"We had a disagreement yesterday. I was upset and sort of took it out on him."

"I know that Alexis can do no wrong with me. Not that she ever does anything wrong. My point is, he's your dad. I'm sure he understands."

"I'm scared of losing him. I'm trying really hard not to fall apart here." Beckett confessed.

The elevator dinged and opened to reveal the ICU floor. Castle offered his arm for Beckett to take. "You don't have to try too hard, I'm here, remember?"

Beckett took a deep breath and took Castle's arm. They walked with arms linked toward the ICU unit. They walked right past the visitors' area and didn't notice their friends who were gathered there.

"We came here for moral support, but it looks like you've got all the support you need." Lanie teased.

Castle and Beckett were quick to part arms and looked back simultaneously to see their colleagues, Esposito, Ryan and Lanie, who were stifling their snickers.

"Are you guys together now? And we didn't even get the memo?" Esposito asked pretending to sound hurt.

"No," Beckett said, but Castle said, "Maybe" at the same time.

Castle turned to his friends and said, "Like I'd ever say the words..." Castle glanced at Beckett who was already looking at him "Kate Beckett, will you be my girlfriend?" The look lingered a little longer than it should have, the pair seemingly looking for answers in the other's eyes. Even the trio who were watching could have sworn he sounded completely serious.

Kevin snapped his fingers and pointed at Castle. "Hang on, Castle. I know that look. You spent the night together, didn't you?" He asked tactlessly, being notoriously infamous for not being able to filter his thoughts.

Esposito and Lanie were both shocked at the accusation and there was a momentary silence. Castle was quick to redeem himself. "I don't kiss and tell." He joked knowing it would drive their friends mad trying to find out what happened.

Beckett laughed and couldn't help but join in, "Neither do I."

The looks on their colleagues faces was priceless.

Javier hit Castle's shoulder with the back of his hand, "Bro. Come'on!"

"Girl, you better tell me what's going on." Lanie probed her best friend.

"You three are being ridiculous. But I'm happy to see you." Beckett replied.

The group all chatted for a while till Beckett excused herself to go over some details with the nurses and to check on her dad.

"I forgot they aren't letting me in till 1" Kate came back just a few minutes later looking disappointed.

"In the meantime, we've got a present for you." Esposito took a file out of his bag.

"Double homicide. But one isn't in our jurisdiction. Twin brothers. UCLA kids. One was reported missing a week ago, found dead yesterday in a motel downtown. We called to inform to the family, turns out, his brother was found dead this morning in his dorm room back at UCLA." Ryan explained.

"We need the best." Esposito said.

Beckett grabbed the file and walked with the boys to the nearest set of chairs and asked a couple of questions of her own, leaving Lanie and Castle standing in the hallway.

"Well?" Lanie began.

"Well, what?"

"I've known Beckett a long time. I know every micro-expression there is to know. There's got to be a reason why her eyes are being all happy sparkly. So what is it?"

Castle ignored Lanie's question and asked one of his own. "You think I'd be good for her, don't you?"

Lanie beamed. "I think you'd make her very happy."

"I really like her, Lanie. But I don't want to screw this up."

"Castle, come take a look at this." Beckett called.

Castle smiled, "She calls, and I answer. That's how it works. And I don't mind it one bit."

The group decided to go down to the precinct so Beckett could look at the murder board the boys had set up. Since she wouldn't be able to see her dad till the afternoon, she figured why not try and close a case. There were no witnesses so the first thing they did was pull phone records but there was nothing suspicious. They also interviewed the first victim's girlfriend who had come into the precinct distraught. She said that they ran away together to New York because both their parents didn't approve of their relationship. She told them that her brother found out and came to bring her home but she wouldn't go with him. When her brother tried to grab her arm to get her in the car, her boyfriend took a swing at him and the pair got into brawl. She managed to break it up. Beckett asked where she could find her brother and was sure that she had a prime suspect. But then the girl told them that the reason she wasn't with her boyfriend when he was killed was because she went to her brother's hotel room to talk to him, giving the brother a solid alibi.

With no new leads, Castle and the three detectives went to have lunch at a nearby diner. Esposito and Ryan hadn't touched their food when someone called to say that their victim's dad flew in from California and needed to be picked up from the airport so they had to get a move on. They had their food packed and hopped into their car.

"We've got like 2 hours kill before they'll let you in to see your dad." Castle began once they were alone. "How do we pass the time?"

Beckett took a bite of her garden salad. "Eat slowly." She mocked an exaggerated pleasurable bite the way they do on cooking shows.

Castle laughed. "I take it you're feeling better." He played with the potatoes on his plate before putting one in his mouth.

"Yes, never underestimate the power of an Advil." Beckett laughed as if something just went through her head, "I remember this one time in college, my best friend was throwing this ridiculously huge party for—" She stopped when she saw how intrigued Castle looked. "Maybe that's a story for another time."

"Oh! now that's just mean!"

Kate flashed a teasing smile and took another bite. After a few minutes of Castle prying and Beckett saying no, they spent the rest of the meal talking about the case until a passing van gave Castle a thought.

"Hurry and finish your food. I've got an idea!" Castle urged excitedly. He downed the last of his coke and grinned at Beckett.

She swallowed the last bit of her food and had a sip of water. She raised her eyebrow at him "What are you up to, Castle?"

"You'll see. Come'on." Castle led Beckett eagerly to the parking lot of the precinct and ran up ahead of her to get the car door for her. "I'll bring you to the hospital by one, I promise."

Beckett got in the car and laughed at how Castle ran excitedly to the driver's side.

"Where are we going?" she asked as she put her seatbelt on.

"It's a surprise!"

Beckett chuckled. "Next thing I know you're going to blindfold me." She joked.

Castle revved up the engine, checked his mirrors and put on his seatbelt. "That's a good idea! Close your eyes!"

"You're kidding?"

"Not at all." He turned to her with a childlike glint in his eyes. "Please!"

Beckett shook her head but she obliged. "This better be good," she said smiling.

They didn't drive for very long. Finally coming to a stop, Castle unlatched his seatbelt. "No peeking."

Kate heard him get out of the car and heard her door open. "Can I open my eyes, now?" She asked as she felt his hand on hers helping her out of the car.

"Not yet, almost." He said. Kate attempted to stand up too early and her head almost hit the metal edge of the car but Castle put his hand over her head to block it. "Watch your head now."

"I would, but you won't let me open my eyes." She joked. When she was standing, she heard the car door close and she felt him put his hands over her eyes.

"Walk with me." Castle led Kate to the entrance. They took a few steps and Kate heard the swish of an opening door. He side-stepped but kept his arm around her. "Now open."

Kate opened her eyes, squinting at first as her eyes adjusted to the brightness. She laughed. "This is the big surprise? The home depot? What on earth are we doing here?"

"We're going to furnish your apartment!" He said excitedly like it was the most brilliant idea ever conceived.

Castle dragged Beckett to the furniture section and sat on every couch in sight, bringing Kate along with him. They stayed seated on a particularly comfortable one. "I already bought a couch. It's everything else I don't have." Kate said. The cushion was soft and it sank in the middle where they sat, seating them even closer.

An employee approached them with a tag on her shirt saying 'Hi! I'm Jane. How may I help you?'

"Let me guess, newly-weds?" Jane supposed.

Castle and Beckett both looked surprised. Before they could say anything, the chirpy attendant guessed again, "Okay, wait, don't tell me, you're just moving in together?"

Beckett tried to speak up with Jane beat her to it. "Damn. I always get this on the first try. Alright, I've got it! Happily married and looking to renovate?"

Both Beckett and Castle laughed. "I'm sorry, but not even close." Castle said.

"I got a new apartment, and I need furniture." Beckett clarified.

"Oh. Darn it! You guys ruined my streak. I'm pretty good at guessing what couples are here for."

"We're not a couple." Beckett said. It didn't stop her from smiling at the thought though.

Jane's face fell. "Shame, you guys would make an adorable couple." She shrugged her shoulders, "Well, I might as well show you all the best deals. Come this way."

They toured the furniture section taking note of the ones that would look good in Beckett's apartment. Castle would comment of the design while Beckett would comment on the prices.

"That, that, oh that one, oh and definitely that one! That red one and that bean bag! Everyone needs a bean bag. All those pieces will look great with your couch!" Castle exclaimed pointing animatedly at each piece of furniture. "We'll have them move the stuff in and then you could have a housewarming party!"

"I don't think so." Kate said hating the way it made Castle's excitement diffuse.

"Why? Don't you like them?" He asked with a slight frown.

"I love them. But that's all going to cost at least my next five pay checks." Beckett said looking at the tag of a nearby bar stool in disbelief. She spotted and walked over to a coffee table and traced the edge with her finger seemingly distracted for a moment. "I think I will take this one though." She said to Jane. "You guys deliver, right?"

"Yes, I'll go check the delivery schedule to find out when to expect it. Excuse me a minute" Jane hurried across the room to a cashier counter.

Kate turned to Castle. "My mom had a similar one." She said pressing her upper lip down and tugging her chin up for a half-hearted smile.

Jane darted back to them with a log book in hand. She flipped through it hurriedly. "They're swapped with deliveries until six tonight."

"That's fine. I won't be home till around that time anyway." Beckett said.

"Perfect!" Jane announced perkily. She handed a form to fill up and walked with her to her counter. Castle followed close behind looking disappointed. Kate handed her credit card to the cashier. "Expect the delivery at around 6:30 tonight?" Beckett nodded.

Jane pointed on spot on the form. "Just write your address there and sign your name over there and great! You're the proud owner a new coffee table!" She scurried off to help another customer.

Beckett checked the time, "We should get back." She told Castle.

He searched his pocket for his keys. "Here , go ahead." He handed them to her. "Nature calls."

A few minutes later Castle came out to find Beckett in the driver's seat. She opened the window and Castle leaned over. "Can you even drive a stick shift?"

"I'm a cop! Of course I can. Okay, I haven't in a very long time. But I'm sure it'll come back to me." She grinned. "Can I drive, please?"

Castle couldn't deny her with that smile. "Fine." He walked over to the other side and got into the passenger seat. "How long ago did you say it was since you drove one of these?"

"When I was still learning to drive and I backed my Dad's Chevy into the garage wall."

"Well that inspires confidence." Castle joked.

"Why do you think I got a bike instead?" Kate revved up the engine only to have to car lurch forward abruptly and come to stop. "What happened?" She asked when the engine died.

"You have to put it on neutral before you start the car." Castle informed, suddenly worried about the safety of his car, and their lives. "Maybe I should—"

"No, no, I got this." Beckett interrupted, starting the car up again looking maniacally amused.

They managed to arrive at the hospital but not without Castle's frantic comments along the way. "See! Now that wasn't so bad." Beckett remarked very pleased with herself. She was just driving into the hospital parking lot.

Castle gulped when he saw a Mercedes in the spot beside the space Beckett intended to park. "Maybe I should park."

"But—"

"It's already 1:30, your dad will be expecting you."

"Fine." Kate acquiesced and stepped out of the car.

Castle slid over to the driver's seat and parked the car. He knew that he wouldn't be allowed into the ICU and that Kate would probably be in there all afternoon, but he wanted to get an update on Jim anyway. They took the elevator the ICU floor and luckily found the doctor who replaced Josh for Jim's case in the elevator with him.

"Hey doctor, I don't know if you remember me but I'm a friend of that tall brunette who's the daughter of one your patients? Jim Beckett?"

"Oh, Yeah. Hello. What can I do for you?" The doctor said shaking Castle's hand.

"I was wondering what was going on with Mr. Beckett. I'm not immediate family so they won't let me in his room." Castle explained.

The doctor looked through the patient charts he had in his hand and found Jim's. He took a second to scan the page and turned back to Castle. "Ah, yes. Well his condition is critical and there's not much we can do. He'll be sent home once he's stabilized and all we can really do is wait for a donor heart. We're convening a transplant panel tomorrow morning." The doctor informed.

The elevator door opened to reveal the ICU floor and both Castle and the doctor stepped out. The doctor went straight into the ICU unit and Castle was stopped at the nurses' station. "I'll only be inside for a minute!" Castle pleaded with the nurse.

"I'm sorry sir, those are the rules." The nurse told him.

"Rick? Rick Castle? Is that you?" a voice from behind called.

Castle turned to find a familiar face he hadn't seen a very long time. "Vince? How long has it been?"

"Like 20 years? Where'd you go after you...uhm... left Browning? "

"Don't worry. You can say it, after I got kicked out? Well, I went everywhere else." Castle joked. "What about you? Look at you in the white coat."

"Man, that was entirely my fault. It was my idea to bring the fireworks." Vince said apologetically.

"Yeah, but I lit them! Don't even worry about it. If it wasn't that, I'd have found something else to get myself booted. I couldn't implicate Mr. Honor Roll." Castle said grinning.

"Well, I still owe you one. What are you doing here anyway?"

"My friend's dad is in the ICU, needs a heart transplant."

"Wait, Jim Beckett? I'm going to be in his transplant panel tomorrow. Then that means that your friend is-"

Beckett timely walked out of the ICU unit and stopped suddenly when she noticed that Castle and another doctor were looking at her.

"Hey," she said to Castle. "I'm going to go get my dad a subway because he doesn't like the food."

"I can go get it" Castle offered.

"No, it's okay. I'll do it. But Ryan called though. They need a fresh pair of eyes and were wondering if you could stop by the precinct."

"Yeah. Okay. Tell them I'll be there in half an hour."

"Alright, see ya." Beckett said and headed toward the elevator.

Castle eyes lingered at Kate's back as she walked away till his friend interrupted by clearing his throat. "Just a friend, huh Rick?"

Castle smirked, "Not for long." He joked. Vince had no idea how much Castle wished it were true.

Vince's pager went off. "Damn. I've got to go. We should grab a beer one of these days." With that, Vince hurried to the opposite end of the hall.

Castle went back to his car and made his way to the precinct.

Kate put on her pajamas. She was ready to turn in after a long day. It was still early but she figured she should make up for the previous night. She was just about to enter the bedroom when there was a knock on the door.

She opened it to reveal Castle, dressed very dashingly with the infamous red bottle of scotch in hand, standing outside her door.

"It's 6. I said 6, didn't I?"

"I thought you were kidding."

"Oh no, this pin-striped suit says I was being completely serious. "

"I'm in my pajamas."

"I don't mind." Castle flashed her a smile she couldn't resist.

Beckett shook her head. "Come in."

He revealed a brown paper back. "I brought take-out."

"Well then how can I say no? Make yourself comfortable. I'll go change."

"Into a night gown?" Castle joked, but he was actually hoping she'd agree.

"Oh, you couldn't handle that just yet, Castle." She teased. She surprised herself at how flirty she was being, but she couldn't seem to stop.

Kate disappeared into her room. She was frustrated trying to pick the perfect outfit while not taking too much time so it didn't seem obvious that she was obsessing over what to wear. She wanted to go for sexy but not too sexy like she was seducing him. She wanted to show skin but not too much skin that she seemed too slutty.

"And Beckett?" Castle called loudly from the living room

"Yeah?" She answered while deciding between two outfits.

"Did you forget? They're making that delivery at 6:30, aren't they?" Castle reminded.

She finally decided on a printed sleeveless v-neck blouse and grey slim fit jeans. She put them on hurriedly. "Oh yeah! I completely forgot!" Kate said as she exited her bedroom

There was a knock on the door. "Home Depot delivery." The man called.

"They're early." Caste reached for the door, but before he opened it he turned to Beckett. "I went behind your back. I have a surprise." He opened the door and let a group of guys come in with a dozen of new furniture. They kept coming. All the pieces they had picked at the store.

"What's all this? I bought a coffee table." Beckett tried to say.

"I covered the rest."

"Castle, this is too much. I couldn't..." Beckett said feeling very embarrassed at the grand gesture.

"Nonsense." Castle replied

She put her hand on his arm to tell him she was serious. "No, it's too much, Castle."

"Hey, what I'm making from the Nikki Heat books, that's all thanks to you. It's practically your fair cut in everything. Like copyright Kate Beckett." He smiled.

Beckett still had that worried look on her face. "Castle, really."

"Really, really. Look, either you accept or I leave all of this stuff outside. You know I will."

Beckett sighed in defeat and it only widened Castle's grin. "Now, are you ready to make this place look great, or what?"

They spent the next hour having the delivery guys move things around, trying to place things properly, looking for the best positions for all the pieces. When they were satisfied, Kate tipped the delivery guys and closed the door. He surveyed the room and whistled. "Place looks amazing!"

Beckett couldn't help but agree. She loved it even more than her old place. "It does. I cannot thank you enough."

"You can thank me, by celebrating. This is your pre-housewarming party." Castle said lifting the forgotten bottle of scotch from the counter top.

"I won't be drinking scotch for a while. But I think I've got a bottle of wine in the fridge."

Castle went to check and found the bottle already chilled and took it out. Kate searched her cupboard for two wine glasses and set them on the table. She grabbed her corkscrew and handed it to Castle. He uncorked the bottle of wine and poured the wine till the glasses were half-full

"I feel like an alcoholic now! Don't you think I had enough to drink last night?" Beckett asked out of caution.

"That was scotch, this is red wine." When all he got was a smirk instead of a laugh, he added, "Come'on, one glass won't hurt." He lifted the glass for her to take.

She rolled her eyes. "Fine, just this one." She took the glass from him and took a sip.

Castle started unwrapping the food bags. "Food's cold." He said disappointed. He took out one of the plastic forks and had a taste. "But still good!" He pulled out a chair of her, "Care to join me?"

Beckett chuckled and took a seat. "Do you spoil all your friends, Castle?"

He pursed his lips and thought a moment. He didn't see her as just a friend that was for sure. "No, not all of them."

The pair chatted non-stop as they had dinner, never running out of things to talk about and to laugh about.

"Oh! You know what I just realized." Beckett said as they were cleaning up. "We took all three meals together, today."

Castle smiled at the thought. "Except breakfast, you ate, I watched."

"That was a little creepy by the way!" She said flicking him with a dishtowel.

"We work together. Eat our meals together. We bicker." Castle mused, and then next thing kind of just slipped out, "We're practically married." He stole a glance at Kate to see how she reacted but she had her back to him.

She turned away from him right away so he wouldn't see the silly grin on her face. She was glad her hands were full or she'd be twirling her hair as well. She bit her lip debating on whether she should say what first came to her head when he said that. She decided to go ahead with it. "Mr and Mrs. Castle." She laughed. When she was able to control her expressions, she turned back, but was caught by surprise at how close Castle was. He took the dishtowel and the glass in her hands and set them down on the table.

"Listen Beckett," Castle began. His mouth was dry and his stomach felt like there was a vortex inside it. But he didn't want to waste anymore time. He was sure about how he felt about her. And after last night, there was a chance she felt the same way for him. "Listen Kate" He rephrased.

Kate's heart was racing. The look in his eyes was so intense. A look of longing. He called her Kate again. He ran her hand down her arm and finally found hers.

"You know I care about you." Castle took a pause because he was tongue-tied. He pictured himself smoother when he was mulling this moment over in the afternoon.

She felt a lump in her throat when she couldn't find the words in the sudden shift of the mood in the room. She was fully aware of the tight grip on her hand and the closeness of their bodies.

"I thought over what to say before I came here, now I can't seem to remember anything." He looked to the ceiling as if it would jog his memory. "Maybe I should have made note cards." He laughed nervously which was very unlike him. He expected her to say something but she didn't. She was waiting—the curiosity glinting in her green eyes. He cleared his throat. "I'm usually better at this, I promise." He breathed out. "I like you, Kate. I find you...breath-taking." He squeezed her hands. "And I know that you and Josh just broke it off but I realized a few days ago that I've had these feelings for you for a long time." He glanced to his feet and took a breath. "I've loved you for a long time."

Beckett was speechless. Her head was spinning and her heart was swelling up. These were the words every girl wanted to hear from the guy she liked. But her first response, the one she couldn't shake off, was fear. What if it didn't work out? What if she turned out to be another conquest? What if he really didn't have it in him to commit?

Castle sighed. "I probably should have timed that better. It's a little weird to have done that in the kitchen." He smiled at her but she still hadn't said anything. "I hope that's a good kind of speechless."

Kate willed herself to say something but she had no idea how to respond. She wanted to grab him by his jacket and pull him in for a long kiss. She wanted to tell him that she just might be in love with him too. She wanted to tell him that they'd make it work but instead her fear got the better of her and the words that came out were: "Castle. We can't"

Those weren't the words he wanted to hear and it broke his heart. He guessed she was the completely honest type of drunk after all. The way he played it out in his head that afternoon—this was about the time they'd be diving reckless into the couch with lips locked.

"I'd have written this differently if it was up to me, but this is real life."

"I'm sorry, I—"

"Hey, don't apologize." He let go of her hands. "You don't have to love be back, that'd be nice though" he joked to snap her out of seemingly petrified state, "but I can't force the issue"

"Castle. There's just so many—"

"You don't have to have an explanation either, Kate." He smiled but his heart felt like it was road-kill.

She didn't reply. A thought popped in his head and he laughed. "I'm not bribing you with furniture, either."

She laughed as well. "I didn't think of it that way, but oh my god, you totally are!" She joked wanting to lighten the mood. Beckett wasn't sure why she didn't just throw herself at him. She knew she wanted to. Even as she stood there after turning him down, she wanted to tell him she changed her mind and that he should kiss her right now.

"It's getting late, and I promised Alexis I'd be home tonight." Castle said.

They walked together silently to the living room. She got the door for him. Deep inside, Kate wanted to tell him. She wanted to tell him so bad but he couldn't bring herself to. He had his foot out the door and was about to walk away. "Caste, wait." Beckett let out when she panicked as she watched him leave. She took a step forward. "I do have feelings for you."

There was that flicker of hope. He turned to face her. She mumbled endlessly "It's just that... I— I...Uhm. You are... This is..."

Castle moved closer. "Ssshh." He tucked a clump of stray hair behind her ear. "You don't have to make a decision right now. I won't hold it against you. I just want you to know how I feel. And when you're ready, I'll be here. Till then, I'll still be here. And if you decide otherwise, I won't go anywhere either."

He leaned toward her and kissed her softly on the cheek. "Good night, Kate."

A/N: Would you be so kind as to leave a review?