Chapter Eight: Knight


Saitama scratched his head as he stood over the prone body of the weirdo with the cone stick.

The address the guy had given him was way over in City A. It'd probably take him a while to run there and the day was already starting to end. By the time he ran over there, told everyone to leave him alone, and came back, it would probably be the middle of the night. Staying up too late eventually meant he would wake up too late, which would in turn throw off his training schedule completely.

Maybe he should leave this problem for tomorrow? It wasn't like they were gonna start pounding his door in the middle of the night. Weirdos had to sleep too after all.

Saitama stood there for a moment before nodding and turning around.

Tomorrow it is.


Tomorrow came and brought all of its problems with it.

"Is this the place?"

"Yep. Witnesses saw him coming here. From the looks of the footage he lives alone."

"And the civilians?"

"There are none. Everyone moved out of this area a long time ago."

"Perfect."

There was some scuffling before he heard something pounding at his door. A moment later, there was a crash and suddenly Saitama was opening his eyes to the sight of a sword right in his face.

It took him a moment to process what he was seeing: the image of what looked to be a crossdressing man holding a sword near his left cheek. Behind him, he could also make out some guy dressed up in armor as well as his now broken door. He felt his eye twitch.

"Come on, get up. We're taking you down to the -"


Ian blinked and missed it.

One moment he was watching Okama arrest the man known as the Blue Tracker, the next he was staring up at the sky.

He blinked and tried to sit up. It felt so hard to move. He could barely breath because his armor collapsed in on itself. He felt blood trickle down the side of his head and he blindly groped for his sword, his vision threatening to be consumed by the darkness at the edges. Every movement was agony and yet he couldn't stop trying to reach for his sword. He needed it. He needed it if he was going to be able to -

He felt his fingers wrap around what felt to be a hilt. A shaky smile spread across his face as he lifted it up. Funny, it seemed lighter than normal...

Oh. It was broken.

He had a feeling that wasn't good.

A part of him was screaming, telling him to run and hide. Another part was telling him to get up and fight, that his friend was in danger. But he found himself consumed by the pressure in the back of his head, that made him want to fall down and just... sleep.

Footsteps.

Ian looked up to see a man walk towards him. Dressed in what he could only describe to be a hero's costume. It should have looked silly considering the color scheme - yellow, white and red? Really? - but somehow the man who wore it made it seem threatening.

He recognized that face. The face that had been on the bulletin boards of the Heroes Association for some time now. Even though he had shaved his head - undoubtedly to conceal his identity - he could still recognize those blank eyes. Cold eyes, as though he was looking at ants instead of humans.

"You know, I was gonna wait until the afternoon to do this, but I guess I've waited long enough." The man folded his arms. "I'm getting pretty tired of you weirdos attacking me all the time. So I'm gonna deal with it, right now."

It took Ian a moment to realize what he was talking about. When he did, it was as though a block of ice had entered his stomach.

This man - this villain - was going to attack the Hero Association base.

A part of him wanted to laugh. To think that a single villain will be enough to challenge an entire base full of heroes? It was laughable.

A part of him - the part that felt as this man had destroyed him with such little effort - felt cold. Even if he were to fail, many lives would be lost. He had to do something. He had to -

He tried to get to his feet, his limbs shaking under his weight. The remains of his sword shook in his grasp as he pointed it at the villain before him. The villain looked unimpressed. "You do not have the right to use that costume, villain."

"Villain? What are you -"

"Your costume may be ridiculous and tacky -"

"Hey!"

"-but it is obviously a costume fit for a hero." Ian readied himself, sword held in two hands. "And I'll be damned if I'll allow you to stain the honor of whomever that suit belongs to!"

"...me. It belongs to me."

"Silence! This ends here! I will not allow you to continue your path of destruction! On my honor as Ia-Ian, disciple to Atomic Samurai, I will -"

The villain sighed. "You talk to much."

There was a crack of air.

A blur of red.

And Ian's world went dark.


Saitama shook his head as he dropped the weirdos off at a nearby hospital.

"Man, I must have hit that knight one too hard. He was sprouting all sorts of nonsense near the end there." Saitama glanced down at the rapidly clearing roadway, not noticing the panicking people who were doing their best to get away from him. "Now, which way was City A again?"


"Master, it is me."

"Bushidrill. Have you and my other three apprentices managed to take care of the villain that's been causing such a ruckus lately?"

"...no, Master. I was dealing with a monster that was causing some trouble in downtown City Z. When I came back, they were badly defeated."

"...I see."

"Ian was able to tell me one thing about this villain however."

"And that is?"

"He had shaved his head and was wearing a stolen hero costume. He is also heading for the Hero Association building."

"Hmm... a cocky one. Don't worry, Bushidrill. I'll make sure to take care of him."

"Of course, Master."