This chapter was hard. I hope its not too boring, I tried. :$


Under everything, just another human being

Everyone stays still, looking at the boy. He's got the bomb in his hand, extended towards us, clenching it lightly. A red light is on.

"There's no way that's armed" says Clove, but her voice sounds uncertain.

The boy lifts one eyebrow and tilts his head.

"I don't know how up to date you guys are on victors from my District…" A patch on his arm clearly marks his district as '3';"…but my mentor's name is Beetee. He won his games by electrocuting all remaining contestants. Back home, I work in the electrical plants, I make electrical connections for the infrastructure all around Panem. Arming this bomb was easy. It's set off by pressure. If I release my hold on it, we all explode."

Everyone is tense. There is nothing, nothing any one of us can do to stop him if he decides to kills us all.

For a moment, I wonder about the outcome if he does. It would be suicide, but he'd take out 5 of the most promising prospects in one move, destroy Capitol expectations and give one of the other districts a chance of winning. It would be a huge fuck you to the Game-makers, the President, and the system.

But I hope he doesn't set it off, because I want to live. By the looks of it, he does too.

Cato speaks. His voice is calmer than Clove's, it's obvious to anyone by know that he is the leader of the Careers.

"What's your offer? How do you make sure we don't kill you the moment we're sure that bomb won't explode, and how do we know that the moment we let you into our alliance you won't blow us up the second you're far enough away from us to clear the blast?"

The kid -he's short, his skin is lighter than mine but darker than the other's in the group- takes a deep breath and nods.

"As I said, I want to form an alliance with you. I know I don't look like much, and in a fight I am probably useless to you. But I can arm all the bombs around the platforms. I can use them as weapons, or I could burry them around the supplies, make sure that no one can steal your stuff…" He stops, hesitates. "As for trust…"

It's a loaded question. Cato means it, how do we trust one another? but its more than that. The games are life and death for all of us here in the arena, but this is television for the Capitol. Everything we do, at least those of us who have the possibility of sponsors, is to look good for them.

If the District 3 boy plans to survive, that means he's playing to that invisible viewers as much as he's trying to convince us.

"As for trust", he starts again, "You can trust that I don't want to die. I have a better chance doing that if I stay with you than I do out in the arena. I don't know how to get food, I don't know how to fight. And I'll trust your word if you say you won't try to kill me until the final 10. I've counted the bodies outside, that means there are 9 tributes still hiding before you'd have to get to me, and you loose nothing waiting."

After he finishes speaking, we stay silent for a while, thinking about what he said, though I imagine we are all thinking the same thing. Marvel verbalizes it.

"It's not like we have any other choice but to trust each other, or, like you said, we all die."

"I can promise to wait to the final 10, and not kill you while you sleep", offers Glimmer.

"I can promise to wait as well", says Cato, and turns to look at Clove.

She's glaring at the boy, but she nods, and hisses, "I promise you'll have a head start when I decide its time for you to die... and I promise it won't matter." A shiver goes up my spine. This girl is terrifying.

The District 3 boy shakes, but says nothing. They turn to look at me, and once again I'm shocked to be considered one of them. It wasn't even half an hour ago when I wasn't.

"I promise", is all I say.

Tense, we all wait as the boy nods, and then, hesitantly, says,

"I'm going to need someone's help to disarm the bomb."

Awkwardly, the career's look at each other. Glimmer speaks up, looking at me.

"12 you go, you said you where good with traps."

I don't argue. The Career's all step back, but I know that if the bomb does explode it doesn't matter if you are right besides the blast or a little farther away.

I step up to the boy and trust, as he said, that he wants to live, and that if he doesn't disarm the bomb properly, he dies as well. It doesn't take long, my job basically amounts to holding the bomb compressed while the kid frees both his hands to move around the wires. The red light turns off.

"My name's Ian", he says

"Gale" I respond.

As he works, I explain the rule they just taught me, about claiming things. Mostly everything is claimed already, but Ian doesn't complain. When he tells me its done, that I can stop clenching my hand, we all hold our breaths. As I slowly open my hand, A flash of fear goes through me.

Nothing happens.

Thankfully.

We all breathe out. Marvel even laughs a little, shakily. We stand around a minute longer, unsure of how to proceed, then Cato shoulders his bag again, and says authoritatively,

"All right, lets move out".

With Ian's new offer, we do several trips, moving everything towards the lake, which is actually closer than what I'd judged, and leave nothing behind to burn. The sky begins to change color as we make the last trip, and Ian haltingly explains to Marvel and me that it will take him a couple of days to un-burry all of the bombs, arm them once more, and burry them again, since he doesn't want to set them off, and doesn't have a shovel.

"Whatever" says Marvel.

We build a fire out of broken branches we bring back from the woods and kerosene from the Cornucopia, and set up sleeping bags around the fire. We make a sort of circle around it. Closest to the lake is Clove, then Cato, who has the only tent among us, then Glimmer, then Marvel, then me and Ian. As the The Panem Anthem starts up, we start shifting through the food and picking out dinner.

It seems obvious to us all to eat the perishable foods first, as those will go bad within a day or two, and to leave the canned and instantaneous food for later. I pick out a sandwich and a casserole with some baked potatoes to eat. We stare up at the faces of the tributes who have died the first day.

When it's done, I think that's the end of it, and that we'll try to sleep. It's around 7, I think, much earlier than my usual bedtime, but its been a long day, and I do want to rest, if I can.

But apparently my allies don't feel the same.

"I'm restless", declares Cato, and stands up. "I'm too hyped up to sleep. Let's go hunt."

Glimmer jumps up and smiles at him. "Worst thing that could happen is we don't get to kill someone! Lets go!".

So it's decided. Despite not wanting to, I stand up, grab my night-goggles, probably one of my best claims, and my knife, ready to go. I can't seem weak to them, not ever, or unwilling to do what has to be done.

Glimmer grabs the bow and an axe, Marvel a couple of spears. I can tell that some of them are made for throwing, some for close combat.

There is a second when the careers all stare at Ian, unsure. Ian grabs a sickle, one of the only weapons he managed to secure for himself, still sitting by the fire, and says,

"I'll keep watch" in a small voice. We have no choice but to trust in him.

Cato goes up to him and grabs him by the shirt, pulling him up.

"If you betray us now, 3, I promise we will find you, and you will suffer." Ian whimpers, but nods.

Without a second look, Cato drops him and heads off.

"Clove! You were in charge of keeping track of the tributes, which way?"

And with that, we head out. We track through the woods for about an hour. Its odd for me. Traveling in a pack makes me feel more secure than hunting alone, but though they are not talking too much, their boots crunch to loudly for me, they trip over stuff and it sets me on edge.

"If we don't find someone before midnight we call it a night" says Clove, bored. We all agree, but it's not long before we find a girl who has stupidly lit a fire. Cato kills her, but everyone's energy seems to run low and we return to camp. As we reach the edge of the woods, the canon sounds, signifying that the girl had not died immediately, but most probably bled out. The careers tease Cato for not finishing the job right, but I stay quiet. Once back at the camp, we set watch turns, 2 hours each. My watch is last, 5 to 7, so I try and sleep.

It's an odd night. I'm always acutely aware of my surroundings, but so tired, emotionally at least, that I do drift off, in and out of dreams of the next day. Glimmer wakes me up, and nodding, I get up.

That next day passes uneventfully.

We set down a schedule. In the morning, we draw straws to see who goes out hunting, who stays watch over the supplies and Ian. Glimmer draws the short straw, so Cato, Marvel, Clove and I go out looking for tributes. After lunch, when we come back to eat, I stay, and the Careers head back out. I spend the time eating, sorting through my supplies and deciding on how to trap my sleeping bag.

Though we are all in a loose circle around the fire, our bags are several meters away from one another, and so 'my' camping space is around a square meter in diameter. I got quite a couple of useful things at the Cornucopia- the night goggles, extra weapons, most importantly, almost all of the medical supplies. I have this half formed plan in my head to keep all of the medicine, injure all the careers, run away, wait for the infection to kill them off… It won't work out.

More realistically though, I think that if Glimmer did get injured in some way, I can offer to trade her the medicine for the bow. Depending on how late in the game it is, and how injured she is… It could happen. But I won't bet on it yet. For now the bow is hers, and I have to make my peace with that.

A little before dusk our allies come back. I've heard no canons, so it means they've found no tributes. Something seems to have happened on their trip as well, because there's a tension around them that wasn't there before.

I watch them all, coiling a wire loosely around my fingers, unsure of what to do with it just yet.

Cato and Clove are arguing on the other side of the fire. Glimmer is close to them, an odd smile, one that doesn't express happiness as much as satisfaction on her face while she watches them. Marvel heads away from them and sits on his sleeping bag, eating alone while he organizes everything he's hoarded from the Cornucopia into neat piles. He's got most of the spears, a lot of other weapons and a variety of nick-nacks he's still trying to figure out and see what to do with.

Ian sits far from all of us- he must be cold, he only managed to claim one blanket, and his sleeping bag is the flimsiest of us all. Around him he's got 3 of the bombs he's already rigged out from the platforms, a pick he found at the Cornucopia and a slab of plastic he uses for digging. I almost admire this kid. He's jumpier than a rabbit, and his alliance with the career tributes is even more tenuous than my own, though far more brilliant. His token seems to be a small wretch-like keychain, and its what he's using to work on the 4th bomb. He's got a carton of milk besides him and a piece of cake, which he's not eating.

Glimmer is washing her hair with some sort of shampoo thing she claimed from the Cornucopia and a bucket of water as she watches Clove and Cato argue. She's stripped off her jacket and shirt, and only has on a sports-bra. Weapons wise, she has a couple of knives and axes besides the bow and arrow, a pillow, many blankets, and other things around her.

As for the District 2 tributes...

Already Cato has had a parachute come down for him. A full meal for tonight: hot soup, chicken and rice, a piece of chocolate cake- while we watched the recap, which amounted to the anthem and that had died yesterday. I imagine the meal is a show of strength from his team. 'Look at Cato' it says. 'He has so many sponsors we can waste money on food he doesn't even need.'

I notice that Cato seems to have won the argument with his district teammate. Clove looks furious- she spits out something, and look around. Her eyes land on me. She stares at me a while, and not one to be intimidated I stare back. She turns her head back to Cato, who shrugs and walks over to Glimmer, glaring at him. Then she takes her bag, previously situated by her district partners, and stomps her way over to me. I tense up.

She stops outside of my designated space and throws her stuff down. I stare at her suspiciously, as she treks back and forth from her previous spot to her new one. Eventually she sits down, her arms crossed, seething.

Glaring at me, she hisses out, "Hey 12, doing anything interesting?"

I stare at her, then down at the wire in my hands.

"Yes" I say, and actually start to make a spring trap.

She begins organizing the things around her, starting with her sleeping bag and then with her backpack.

"Yeah? What" she says.

My mouth runs off before I can even think about what I'm saying, or who I'm saying it to.

"Secret weapon to stop you from murdering me in the night."

She stops what she's doing and snorts in laughter, the frown on her face disappearing momentarily.

"Trust me 12, if I wanted you dead, you'd be dead." she says.

I glare at her, think in for a penny, in for a pound, and reply heatedly.

"You already tried to kill me once 2, and you failed."

She makes a weird face, then snorts. "Please! that knife I threw at you in the Bloodbath? That wasn't serious at all. If you wanna play, you just have to say so and I promise you'll come out loosing." She smiles at me again, a smile that shows off her teeth, real amusement in her eyes.

With a cold shiver, I realize she's right, and continue on with my wire.

Before going to sleep I notice Glimmer pick up her sleeping bag, wink at Clove who snarls, blow her a kiss and then follow Cato into his tent.

The next day passes without any kills once more, and come nighttime, Clove begins talking to me again.

"Tell me about 12" she says.

I stare at her, thinking she's crazy- well, she demonstrated that she obviously is at the Cornucopia, but I just assumed her type of crazy didn't include talk with me.

"Why?" I say, and she shrugs, taking all of her knives out, arranging them in front of her, measuring them by length before putting them away again. I count more than 30.

"Because. I'm curious. Tell me something and I'll tell you something. Like 20 questions."

I stare at her, trying to figure out what it is that she wants from me. But her face just looks at me expectantly, not betraying any hidden motives at all. She's the youngest of all of us here, and also the smallest. If she wasn't so vicious, she'd seem the weakest. Yet in that moment she doesn't look vicious, she doesn't feel it. I remember that she's just 15, younger than Katniss.

"Start with a question then" I tell her.

"The coal mines," she says, and I tense a little, "that's what always stands out about 12… Its always 7- wood, 4-fish, 12- coal. What's that like?"

At first, talking is awkward. I tell her the basics, what you learn in school early on. How deep you have to go to mine coal, the tunnels, the machines. Talking about the mines will never be easy for me, not only because my father died there, but because had I not volunteered for the Hunger Games, I'd already be training to be a miner myself. But her expression is so openly curious, I begin to realize something important.

"Now you tell me about 2, what's training like?" I ask her, and she answers, like me, at first hesitant, but then looking at me, and seeing that I am genuinely curious, and want to know, with more conviction and confidence.

I imagine Clove began this conversation because she was still feeling angry at Cato. He and Glimmer are once again sharing a tent tonight, and we can hear giggling and shuffling from inside their tent. But I also realize Clove must be feeling lonely.

"I don't know how it works in 1, but in 2 we go to an Academy. You go in when you turn 10, and you live there and train there until you turn 18. It prepares us for our future jobs as peacekeepers, and you know, conveniently for the Hunger Games as well. The best 13 students from each class get to choose their district, including the Capitol and 2. The rest get assigned were to go."

I ask her the next question without thinking much.

"Where you a good student?"

Clove's face is expressive. Her eyes shine when she gets exited, and though I can tell her cruel, mean smile is a fabrication, a persona she created for the cameras, looking at her now I can tell she is genuinely exited about this conversation.

"I was the best! And I wanted to go to 4. Ever since I was little I've dreamed of seeing the ocean. Can you imagine? The waves, and the breeze, and it never gets too cold, and water as far as the eyes can see? I'm sure I would have loved it. What about you? where you a good student?"

As I talk, telling her about how I had to drop out of school 4 years ago to begin taking care of my family full-time, I begin to relax. It's not only that I'm actually having fun with this conversation... Marvel is snoring, deeply asleep, as is Ian, though in a quieter way. Cato and Glimmer are busy and even though this conversation in television gold...its also unusable.

Clove and I are talking about things that are taboo. The districts can't know too much about how the other Districts work. Like Clove said, I know that 1 produces diamonds, 2 peacekeepers, 3 electricity... but I don't know much else about them. I don't even know where they are, they never showed us a map in school of the distribution of Panem, not a real one... only a chart with the Capitol at the center and the districts from 1 to 12 going clockwise around it. But I know that can't be true, because then 4 wouldn't be close to the ocean, and they produce fish, and 12 would be north, were its winter most of the year, and no mountains. That doesn't make sense.

Panem keeps all the Districts isolated from one another so we never know how they work, and can never rebel in a joint manner. A conversation like the one Clove and I are having has too much dangerous information. So even though the camera's might be looking at us, they have to be on mute. We are actually having a private conversation, despite being in the most public place in the entire country.

The night wears on.

Clove is on first watch, and we talk about everything and anything. We make fun of Marvel's snoring, Clove vents about Glimmer, we talk about our families. Clove is an only child, or so she thinks. She hasn't seen her parents since she entered the Academy, and they were relatively young when they had her, they could have had a second child. I tell her about the Seam, about how 12 is not only the poorest district but about how it's divided between merchants and the Seam, the poorest of the poor, about how my house is the same house my grandparents lived in, and how we all share what we have because there isn't much to go around, and solidarity is the best way of surviving. I never mention Katniss, though I want to. Just because the viewers can't hear us, doesn't mean the Gamemakers aren't. Clove has begun to remind me of Catnip, though they are almost nothing alike.

Close to midnight, and the end of her watch and the beginning of Ian's I ask,

"How come you decided to use knives?"

She shrugs, and in one movement takes out a knife and throws it at my feet so fast I only see her hand blur and then hear the thunk besides my boot. I stare at it, in my mind reminded of what she said yesterday. If I wanted you dead, you'd be dead.

"I'm small" she says, unaware of my thoughts,

"And I know I won't grow much bigger, so I wanted a weapon that could give me some range on an opponent that is, say, your size. And you can do a lot of fun things with knives up close and personal. They are very versatile."

She's grinning, no longer her fake smile, this one is a real one, and I feel a cold shiver up my spine. I'd forgotten for a moment that Clove is, well, psychotic. And as dangerous, if not more so, than Cato. I'd forgotten that she was more than a fifteen year old girl. She is a Career Tribute, and there is a very real possibility that I will kill her, or that she will kill me.

Awkwardly I pretend to yawn.

"This has been fun Clove," I say, "But I think I'm going to try and rest before it's time for my watch. Good Night."

Clove stands up and stretches.

"Yeah, you do that. Tomorrow we have to be in top shape. If we don't kill someone I'm going to be pissed. Good night Gale"

I turn away from her and try to sleep.


AN:

Quote from one of my all time favorite songs, Just Breathe by Pearl Jam.

Ian is the name of the actor that plays the District 3 tribute, so for lack of anything better, I named him that.

I've gone back and reviewed a couple of errors in previous chapters. I'm sure there are still many mistakes, but english is not my first language, its only my fandom language. If anyone points out any typos or grammar mistakes, I promise to change them.