So here is the next chapter and thank you to those of you who reviewed, alerted and put me under favorites. Really love it! Please review again if you could!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Twilight characters. The OC's though... all mine!
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I couldn't believe I was doing this. That thing had practically murdered Bella and here I was staring at it and about ready to... "talk" or whatever she did.
Renesmee was beautiful, there was no doubt about that. The baby had grown quite a bit since I had seen it ripped from Bella's body. She looked almost as big as Violet. She had bone pale skin, but I could hear the blood flowing through her veins, Bella's brown eyes and Edward's odd colored hair. She stared at me with Bella's eyes, blinking and observing me. It reminded me so much of Violet that I wanted nothing more than to go see the little baby myself. I had to admit, I'd grown kinda attached to my imprints daughter. But this kid wasn't anything like Violet.
Alice held her, Jasper just behind her and Rosalie off to the side looking like she wanted to murder me. I had swore on my life I wouldn't attack the baby, but of course Blondie didn't trust me. The baby pressed a small hand to Alice's neck and the midget vampires eyes glazed over for a moment. I was told the baby communicated like this.
"She wants you to hold her." Alice announced and I saw Rosalie's lips pull up into a growl. Jasper reacted a bit too, leaning a bit closer to Alice and Renesmee. Alice merely stared at me, waiting for an answer. I knew I had to do this to show Sam she was fine and safe. So I let out a breath I'd been holding and took a step forward.
The baby blinked up at me before giving a dazzling smile. I pressed my lips together before opening my arms to the baby. I tried to think of this as Bella's baby, the baby she loved so much. This was my best friends baby. I should love the thing too. And Bella was doing okay now. I let out a breath as the warm baby was placed in my arms. I felt kinda awkward and if I hadn't held Violet those couple of times I wouldn't have known what to do at all. Renesmee was so much more sturdy though and she seemed a lot stronger. Her brown eyes were extremely intelligent as they studied me. She lifted her small hand, pressing it to my cheek.
Several things flashed before my eyes. There was Bella, torn up, covered in blood and dazed. She was reaching out to me and I felt an overwhelming amount of love for her. It wasn't the same as what I felt before, but an awed kind of love one felt for.... well a mother. It took me a moment to register the fact that this was the kids feelings for Bella. It- She loved Bella. I had loved Bella a lot, but this was so much more.
Next I saw Rosalie's face and another, slightly different love. I felt how much the baby liked it when she pressed soft kisses to her cheeks and hair. I then saw Alice as she tried to feed the baby some baby goop, how much she hated it. I felt the thirst she had for the spare blood the vamps had upstairs but I also felt how she understood what Alice told her about how you couldn't bite the humans. The two day old baby understood that she couldn't bite humans because it would get them into trouble. Edward, in one of his brief moments away from Bella had explained it to her and she showed him she understood like she was showing me.
The last thing she showed me was her vision of me, standing before her. I glared at her, my eyes narrowed as I watched her. She was curious and slightly excited about me. She saw me as something different then the other bloodsuckers.... someone who could be a friend. The visions cut off after a minute and I suddenly felt her bite down on my shoulder. I jumped a bit, blinking at her in shock. Her teeth barely left a mark on my skin as she smiled up at me.
"Um... wow." I murmured, staring down at her. She patted my cheek a little, smiling widely still. Alice was watching us curiously while the others alternated between weary looks and full out glares.
"What did she show you?" Rosalie demanded, folding her arms in front of her chest to glare at me.
"A bunch of different stuff... Bella, Alice feeding her... me and her." I said, staring down at the little baby in my arms. She was still watching me with that smile, her fingers running over my shoulder curiously. She looked like she was... petting me. I wondered if that was some cute joke from Rosalie.
"Isn't she something?" Alice crooned, reaching back out for her. Renesmee frowned for a moment when I handed her back like she was going to cry from being separated from me. I guess the kid- Renesmee liked me.
"Yeah... I guess." I mumbled, still staring at the baby. "She really understands she can't hurt humans..." I mumbled in an amazed voice. Renesmee was frowning at me now, almost like she was so bored with this subject. It was hard to wrap my mind around the fact that she actually understood me. Violet did nothing but stare at you and grumble as you tried to talk to her.
"We've made it very clear to her." Jasper said simply and the usually stone faced vampire actually smiled at Renesmee.
"We'll just have to convince Sam."
That was gonna be easier said then done.
Roxanne's POV
Jacob came two days after his freak out on the side of the road, but he was a completely different person. His hair was cut shorter now and evenly instead of that choppy mess, his dark circles under his eyes were completely gone and his whole demeanor was light and happy. He grinned at me widely, his white teeth shining against his dark skin. He was fully dressed for once with a simple gray T-shirt and silk shorts. I stared up at him in shock at the sudden change and I wondered what could have happened to make him this happy over night.
"Hey, Roxxy." He greeted me, rocking on his heels with his hands in his pockets. He stepped forward and grabbed me up before I could even respond, hugging me to him far too tight.
"Jacob!" I squealed, squirming in his arms. God, this whole trying-to-break-Roxanne-in-half thing had to stop. He gave a loud laugh, letting me go and stepping around me into the kitchen where I was feeding Violet. Two weeks knowing a guy and he thought he could just waltz right into the kitchen. I wasn't sure for a moment why I had such a soft spot for him. "What are you doing here?"
"Visiting again." Jacob said, looking at me like I was being silly for asking. I gritted my teeth at him, shaking my head in disbelief. "Hey, Violet." He said, cooing a bit and extending his hand to my daughter. Violet actually smiled at him this time, grabbing his large finger and yanking it. That kinda eased down my irritation. If Violet liked someone, I couldn't help but ease up just a bit. "At least Violet's happy to see me." He said, giving me a pathetic pouty face as he plopped down in my Aunt's kitchen chair. I felt my lips twitch upward a bit as I seated myself across from him, right next to Violet.
"I never said I wasn't excited. You just show up out of no where all the time." I said, shrugging. Violet kept playing with his fingers.
"So you are excited to see me?" He asked, giving me a smug grin. Despite myself I blushed a deep red, rolling my eyes at him. He just laughed, that smug look still on his face. This was a side of Jacob I'd never seen before and I wasn't even sure what to think about it. I mean, I liked it because at least it wasn't pain and hurt. That I was really glad about. I may get mad at Jacob because of his elusiveness but I still didn't want him to hurt so bad. He was a good guy from what I could tell.
"I'm going to take Violet to the beach, if you wanna come." I offered, ignoring his stupid question.
Jacob perked up. "Actually, I was coming to see if you would want to hang out down in La Push with me." He said, leaning toward me a bit and waiting for the answer. He looked so eager and happy that I couldn't even think of saying no. I had such a soft spot for Jacob. I wasn't sure why or where it came from. Maybe it was all the pain I'd seen him in and how much no one deserved that. Or maybe it was because of how easy we got along. But there was something that made me want to make him happy, make him okay. I was sort of protective of him. I guess that was the mother in me.
"Alright, when?" I asked, watching that huge smile break out on his face. His cheeriness was so infectious and I liked it.
"Now, if you want. We could hang out at my house. You could bring the squirt." He said, jerking his head at Violet who smiled at me, like she wanted nothing more than to go see Jacob's house.
I suddenly felt nervous. Emily, Kim and Rachel were all okay with Violet, but they were something entirely different then parents. That was a whole other ball park. I didn't want Jacob's parents to hate me or think less of me. What if they made Jacob stay away? "Um... are- are your parents okay with that? Would they care?"
Jacob didn't even looked fazed. "Billy won't care. He wants to meet you anyway."
"Is that your dad?"
"Yeah." He said simply, shrugging his massive shoulders. "My uh... my mom passed away in a car accident."
I felt my heart drop just a bit. Poor Jake. This kid couldn't get a break. "Sorry." I murmured, peeking up at him through my eyelashes. He just gave me a crooked smile and shrugged again.
"It's cool. I was young." He said, waving his hand. "So you wanna come?"
I took in a deep breath, nodding. It would be nice to get out of the house. "I just gotta tell Selene." I said, but Jacob was already smiling.
"Great."
Jacob's house was small and red, but I loved it. It was so... homey and lived in. I really appreciated what my Aunt was doing for me and Violet and the beautiful rooms she set up, but her house was so spotless and clean it didn't feel like a home most of the time. But Jake's house breathed welcome. His dad did too. Billy, who was older with smiles wrinkles around his mouth and eyes and long black hair streaked with gray tied in a pony tail down his back greeted me with a firm handshake and a huge smile. He didn't even blink as I stuttered out Violet's name and relation to me. He just grinned up at her, greeting her in that baby voice. And Violet loved him.
We set up in his living room, laying out a small blanket of Jacob's for Violet to sit on. She stared around the small living room curiously before grabbing one of the toys I brought her, making herself at home. Jacob lounged back on the couch they had while I leaned back against it near his waist. Even from here I could feel the warmth of him.
He started asking me question after question. Stuff about little stupid things that didn't really matter, like my favorite song and color to bigger things about Jason and my parents. I asked him questions to and he answered, though some parts got a little sketchier. I figured it was about the big, huge secret he couldn't tell me yet and I ignored it. It felt nice to have so much attention on me after being ignored for so long by my parents and eventually my old friends. And Jacob actually cared. I mean, when I told him an answer he looked at me like I was saying the most interesting thing in the world. It was slightly unnerving. Not even Jason had listened to me like Jacob did.
"So... wait." Jacob muttered after some question about the grossest thing that ever happened to me. "You sat there and thought 'she's gonna puke all over me' and you didn't move?" He said, giving a chuckle. "Idiot."
I nudged him in the ribs since he'd moved to sit next to me so he could play with Violet. "I panicked, okay?" I giggled, watching as he held Violet up on shaky legs and bouncing her a bit. She looked so tiny in his huge hands.
"Yeah, right." He mumbled, giving me a lop sided grin that I now called his trade mark. "So, can I ask you something about Violet?"
I glanced at him curiously, nodding slowly. "I guess."
He looked at me, reading my expression carefully. He could hear the sudden edge in my voice. "Nothing bad. I just wondered... I mean... did you ever think of giving her up?"
I pursed my lips and was silent for a long moment. Jacob stared at me carefully, still reading me. "Yes and no." I mumbled after a minute, staring at my hands. "Yes, because my parents made me. Once they found out I was pregnant and refused the abortion, they threw the adoption stuff in my face. Ordered me to do it. But I knew as soon as I felt her kick, I couldn't ever do it."
Jacob's thick eyebrow's pulled together as he thought about this. "They were gonna order you to give her up?"
"Yeah. My parents are really rich. It's a whole different world. Everything for them is about image. Me getting pregnant ruined all that. They yanked me out of school and cut me off from my friends." I shook my head, anger whipping through me as I remembered...
"You did this to yourself, Roxanne. Don't whine at me when your the one who decided to get pregnant." My mother hissed, glaring down at me with her wine in one hands and a cigarette in the other. I lay a hand on now visible baby bump, trying to shield the child inside from whatever was coming next. I knew when my mother drank she got edgier about the pregnancy. And because of the pregnancy she drank more.
"I didn't exactly decide." I snapped, folding my arms across my chest and glaring at her.
"Really?" My mother gasped in mock surprise, that hard edge in her dark eyes. She pressed a hand to her chest dramatically. "I was sure you were doing this to get back at your father and I for being such horrible people. For putting you in a amazing school, forcing you to those beautiful cotillions, for buying you all the clothes you want-"
"God, mother." I sighed, rubbing my belly as the baby kicked softly. It was like it was just as irritated with my mother as me. "Not everything is about you."
"No it's all about you! You and that child." My mom growled, slapping her wine down. It sloshed around, almost spilling onto the fancy in-table. "Get away from me, Roxanne. You can't speak to your friends, can't see them anymore. You did that yourself by getting yourself knocked up."
With that she flicked the cigarette out the window and stormed off, rubbing her forehead like she had a horrible headache.
"It was a very bleak seven months and then 8 months I was stuck till I came here." I mumbled, glancing at Violet as she grinned real big and bounced on her feet herself now.
"You ever regret it?" He asked, setting Violet back on her bottom. She tapped her hands against his arms, squealing with delight.
"No. I'll never regret her." I answered immediately, reaching out to smooth out Violet's blonde curls. "There's not really words to explain how much I love her, even if my life is so different. It's just perfect in a different way, you know?"
"Yeah." He mumbled and his face was suddenly far away. I watched very carefully to make sure there was no pain. To my relief there wasn't. "I'm really sorry for that stuff I said last month about that. You really are an amazing mom." He glanced at me like a sad puppy that was going to get hit but I just shook my head.
"It's fine. I know you didn't mean it." I said, smiling at him and pushing my shoulder against his. "I'll just chalk that up to your asshole faze."
He laughed, watching me as I grabbed Violet up and pressed kisses to her face. She giggled, swatting at me. "I wasn't really doing good then." He murmured, rubbing his hands against his pants. I looked at him, waiting for him to explain. I could hear Billy rolling around in the kitchen.
"Because of Bella?" I asked, watching him nervously. I didn't want to push Jacob, didn't want to see that hurt look on him again, but I wanted- deserved to know more after being so open with him.
"Yeah." He mumbled, rubbing his face tiredly. There wasn't pain there though. "Bella wasn't just some girl, ya know? And I know everyone around town says were young and stuff but she was my best friend. It's more complicated then some 16 year old falling for an older girl and all that crap." He explained, staring at the wall instead of looking at me. Violet had gone quiet in my arms almost like she was listening to Jacob's story too. But she was just occupied with my locket. "I went through a rough time about a year ago. Some stuff happened, the weird stuff," he paused to glance at me and I just nodded, "and Bella was there for me for it. I fell in love with her then, after her husband left her. But he came back and she took him back like it was nothing."
It was so odd listening to this story. Jacob had just been in my Aunt's car two days ago looking like he was going to rip his hair out by the roots because of Bella's mysterious choice and now he didn't even sound bitter when he explained what happened between them. I couldn't wrap my head around what was happening with him. God, he was confusing! But I knew it had something to do with this 'weird' stuff he always talked about.
"It's better now though." He said, shrugging like it was nothing. "Things worked themselves out and me and her are okay." He glanced at me then, a weird look coming over his face. A look so kind and... and loving it caught me off guard. I stared at him, my face turning redder and redder as he continued to stare. But I couldn't look away from those dark eyes. His face was close to mine, just a couple inches away and for a panicked moment I thought for sure he was going to kiss me. He wouldn't really do that, would he? Talk about how much he loved this girl and then try to kiss me? The sixteen year old mother?
"We should probably head out." He said suddenly and in a movement so quick I couldn't even see it, he was up on his feet. He shoved his hand out to me, helping me and Violet up. His hand was warm and huge and soft. Violet cooed on my hip, completely fine even with that weird moment with Jacob. My face, on the other hand, was completely red. I was still a bit in shock and utterly confused. "See you later, dad." Jacob called as we headed out his back door which was almost too low for him. I followed in a daze, not really sure what I was doing. Jacob was perfectly fine though, practically bouncing as we got into his car and headed down to the beach.
I buried my face in Violet's hair, wondering what the hell just happened.
Hope you liked it and please review. And next chapter... big things... big things... hehe
