Soooo...a new chapter after some long waiting...I'm sooooo sorry I didn't update yesterday but I had procrastinated A LOT up until yesterday. The rewritten chapters are up and I think the only chapter there's some new stuff is the second one. I've also put together some chapters so there are fewer ones but I haven't deleted any chapters. Well, that's all, enjoy! :D
"So Sylvia, eh? I hadn't gotten the pleasure of getting to know you," said Kevin, placing his tray of oatmeal next to mine.
"No, not really." I said while my eyes rested on Chris and Marie whom spoked with each other in low voices.
Last night involved me lying restless in bed figuring out the puzzle that was Chris. My conclusion being that I should no longer ignore him as he constantly emerged in my mind, it would be less complicated to actually understand him by acquainting him rather than ratiocinate. Besides he was easy on the eyes, I thought and reveled a smirk that Kevin took note of.
"Why are you smiling like that?" Kevin had asked, stopping his overfilled spoon mid-air.
"Just thought of a joke." I muttered, he was starting to annoy me, I hadn't come all this way to befriend people. It was cold of me to think so but this attitude helped me thought military school and made me successful. The main reason I didn't have this approach for my previous, short-term job depended on the fact that I had almost lost track of where my career was steered, not to mention it was excruciatingly tedious to not join my old colleagues in their conversation.
"What joke?" asked Kevin. "I know a funny joke, wanna hear it?" he continued before I could respond.
"Sure...why not." I turned my gaze back to Kevin and stared into his brown eyes, Chris had left the table with Marie still in their conversation.
"So it's a knock knock joke but it's still hilarious."
I tried to focus on his joke but I kept wondering what Chris and Marie were discussing - why did they speak in low voices, because it was a secret? For once in my life I truly felt intrigued in something that was happening in reality. Riddles and mysterious had always been alluring to me yet I could only find them capturing me in my books or movies.
Charlie and Matt were the final two arriving at the table also in a whispering, suspicious conversation. They both gave me a bad feeling that had existed ever since meeting them in the van and even more so when Charlie gave me that odd compliment, being a good reader when it came to people I decided to keep away from as much as possible.
We were never given any schedule to follow for the simple reason that we would be called in when necessary but we still had some sort of schedule to go after, Marie explained. The day began with two hours in a course about first aid, all of us comprehend the instructions and information because this was something most children were taught though it was good to repeat the knowledge, Matt and Charlie found the whole thing ridiculous and earned themselves a scolding from Marie when she caught them playing with the CPR-dolls. I was surprised it din't earn them a warning that if they continued on like that they'd had to leave.
Next class was in communication and the equipment a SOA always carry in a mission, the blonde short woman named Jane was very clever and pedagogic when explaining how to put on the earpiece, fix the transceiver, and how to use the GPS device that according to Jane should fit in everyone's suit.
"These are the basic the three things you will carry on a usual mission-"
Kevin interrupted her. "Usual mission? What do you mean?"
Jane seemed delighted that some listened to what she was saying because from the look of our faces most of us looked bored.
"I mean if you're going to maybe a city somewhere, in certain places when the soldiers are facing a new type of BOW they would take a wristband that can examine the virus and be sent off to HQ for further analysis."
Kevin looked more alert on the word "wristband", him and I were the rest that showcased most attention to the rest of her walk-through. The brothers Tim and Simon together with me had brought notepads but they had given up on writing anything down and Tim seemed to be doddling instead of paying attention. It wasn't my idea to take notes but I thought of Sara who never needed a second explanation of things in class because of her note-taking. After Jane's class it was time for lunch, Rama and Samir were who ones who weren't present and to explain their absence from lunch the next time Dan, Kevin, Tim, Simon, Matt, Charlie, Damian and I walked back to the supposed classroom the two of them sat there, looking nerdy dorking with crayons in their hands.
"Hey guys, good lunch, eh?" said Rama, winking his eyes and joking about the cold potatoes and meat that lacked a lot of salt we were severed. A few of us grinned at his words then seated ourselves.
"Ah, one of you is smart enough to bring a notebook with them," grinned Rama. Both of the brother's cheeks turned red, presumably because they had forgotten their's at the lunch table which I had noticed but not bothered to tell me as it would be their responsibility to look after their things, but also because I was too shy, I hadn't said a word during the conversation at the table.
"Never mind, it's not that important right now." Samir continued. "As you all know..."
"Psst, can you give me a piece of paper and a pen?" Kevin asked, reaching out his hand. I ripped apart a paper, searched for a sharpened pencil in my pencil case, handing them to Kevin reluctantly, I didn't want to come off as a person to take advantage of.
"Yes, like Samir explained this, your job is going to be tough." Rama grinned again at his words, the word tough was an mild explanation for our job. "Although it feels stupid to keep repeating that you ought to know this well...because the possibility of you dying out there is big." He said in a more serious tone. "This isn't your average office-job where the worst thing can happen is your boss discovering you've been playing on an online poker-site the whole time. Many I've known and Samir knew...have died right before our eyes. And I'm talking about this because I want you to ignore the whole tabu-crap about mental health and actually talk to a psychologist if you need to because it's gonna fuck with your mind, this job."
Samir captured the word after Rama had finished talking. "Every time you go out, facing whatever goddamn BOW you'll have the same feeling you had on your first mission, the same shitty gut feeling but-" he added, emphasizing the word "but", waiting a little to gaze around the classroom at our scared expressions. "Each time you'll get stronger, it'll be a little easier by each time to know what to do in dangerous situations."
"Now the BSAA isn't some sadictisc organization that just ships off soldiers that have no idea what they should do but there was a time when many SOA:s had to act on their instinct as this wasn't one of the courses SOA:s had to take before being sent away. That's also our first rule, follow your goddamn guts." Samir said, pointing at his belly. "You have to know if a situation is dangerous enough or not, this skill is even more important if any of you should become a captain because then you'll be in charge of your team."
Rama turned to the blackboard after Samir finished talking, having created an uncomfortable silence in the room. I wasn't the only one who looked anxious at their words, despite the fact that everyone is aware of what soldiers faced, the fact that your job could kill you wasn't infested in our minds just yet. To see others die, constantly being afraid...was this something I could cope with? I looked around the room and noticed the words had made the others expose a more visible reaction, Dan appeared even more pale than he was with a greenish tone to his skin, the brothers began their infuriating whispering and Charlie had his head hanging in a defeated way. I refused to let the fear stop me, I reasoned, if it was possible for me to come this far...I could make it, somehow. Besides the date of our deaths can arrive at any time but people still carried on living, trying not to think of that horrible fact.
"All right," said Samir. "Listen up. The three types of mass-desctuive weapons that's often spoken about are nuclear, chemical and bioorganic. The thing about two of them are that they can't be fought off with simply soldiers, does anyone know what I'm talking about?" Everyone raised their hands but Dan was given the word.
"Nuclear and chemical," he uttered weakly. Samir let his eyes remain on him before underlining two of the words written on the blackboard. "Correct. I mean if you have soldiers out, fighting somewhere you can easily send a bomb to get rid of them but if you have BOW:s it's different because now soldiers can be used. Not only that but it strikes a certain fear in people, being instantly killed by a nuclear weapon is fucking terrifying but it's more frighting if you threaten the world by turning everyone into mutated, half-dead slaves."
Rama took over after Samir. "Yeah, exactly, which is why I want you to..." I realized I had forgotten taking notes after their troubling talk about facing death and grabbed my pen to write down Rama's advice for how to deal with panic in a battlefield.
The next and last class was before dinner, we all went outside to the shooting range where Patrick stood with cases laid out in front of him.
"Hello, as Marie told you yesterday I'm Patrick." He said in a calm voice after everyone stood ready and waiting for him to begin. "Unlike Marie, I don't want to waste time in repeating things that should be second-nature to you, handling guns is something I presume and hope everyone can do." The group seemed eager to finally do something more action-like and active but I dreaded it would be something difficult as the targets were positioned very far away from where we were standing.
"Before me," said Patrick, "are bolt-action rifles, simple ones that is going to be used for today's practice." He picked up one himself and then nodded to show we should do the same.
"Since I don't want things to be too difficult things, I've taken inspiraiton from my collugue Jane's pedagogic ways and give you simplest rifle for today's class and I might as well repeat how the correct way is to hold a rifle."
He explanied the first exercise was going to be executed standing up, there were eight targets for all of us. After having correcting several of us we took position and at the count of three we had fire. Sweating, I pulled the trigger and the rifle bounced back at my shoulder, creating pain in the region.
"You have to have correct aligment." Patrick told me, showing the rifle had to be parallell with me chin. The wepaonist continued correcting several of us and then counted to three again. This continued on for a while. The next step was to change position into a crouching one. It was even harder for me and I missed the target with all the fifteen shoots we took. At last was the lying down position where once more Patrick showed us the right way to lay down, but this time he also fired the gun for pedagogic reasons as he'd mentioned. Patrick hit the target right in the middle then got up, told us to get into position and lastly counted to three.
I missed all too many times and when the class ended everyone had at least gotten one shoot in the middle. Patrick ordered us to pack up and head for dinner.
"Sylvia, wait a little." He shouted and I heard Charlie and Matt giggle. Angry I strouted back to Patrick who seemed calm.
"I feel you can use a little practice, don't you agree?"
I nodded, ashmed of being the worst.
"It's all right if you practice tonight, I'll inform the others that you'll stay outside after the workout-round with Chris."
What workout? Wouldn't they let us rest after a whole day of information and practice? It turned out Patrick was right, we had a workout with Chris and it was crucially demanding, the dinner didn't help at all as it was boring with rice and some weird fish no one seemed to have the appetite for it. For the sake of no one having to throw up we were allowed to rest for an hour, it had to be nine in the evening when Chris shouted for us to get up. Moaning and complaining, many of us took enough time to change and show up behind the facility near the lake. Chris had his arms crossed and seemed upset but ready to force us go through another of his unpleasant workout. Rama and Samir shook their heads when Damian told them we had Chris that trained us.
"He's rough so it's gonna be tough but still you're lucky cause he's the best there is." Samir said.
The evening had a chilly breeze and the clouds that were barely visible from the dark looked even more heavier so I had worn my mittens and beanie and I wasn't the only one who thought of the weather, Charlie and Matt also wore beanies.
"You're late," said Chris when Tim and Simon had sprinted to us, barely catching their breaths before Chris had spoken.
"Sorry, sir, it's just-" began Tim but was disrupted by Chris.
"I don't just mean you," said Chris yet giving the brothers a rather mean look. "I'm talking to the whole group, next time I don't want to see anyone taking too long to get up, you got it?"
Everyone nodded.
"All right, follow me." He started to run and Charlie hurried to run next to him, I was just behind them so I heard Charlie talking to him.
"Sir, I was wondering...what exactly will we do after we're finished with our...," it took a while before he found the right word. "..education?"
Chris ridged the corners of his mouth. "You'll see," he answered then added, "if you make it." Charlie raised his eyebrows at the answer but it didn't bother Chris as he screamed for us to keep up the pace. I grinned, thinking Charlie deserved the answer but after some time of running I started to get agitated with Chris when I realized he was going to make us run around the lake.
Halfway into the run my mind was occupied with taking in the environment since the rest of my body was fighting to keep running, after a while I spotted the military base area between the tress I had to stop to catch my breath. Damian passed by me without looking at me, I had forgotten to bring my water bottle and noticed he had his with him.
"Hey, I'm really thirsty, if it's okay can I have a sip?" I asked despite the fact that my shyness wanted me to shut up. I was running beside Damian but he simply ignored me, outrunning me. Shocked, I stopped and muttered to myself. I had to walk for a bit then carried on, my mind was now on Damian, what the hell was his problem? Why did he come here if he didn't talk to anyone, sure I was quiet too but I avoided coming off as rude. Would he really behave this way if we were on a mission?
"Jackass." I muttered and started to increase my pace. Chris, the brothers, Kevin and that idiot Damian were the first ones to arrive and one by one the others followed.
"Good, we're all here," said Chris and the rest of us murmured a "yes". How the fuck could he not look tired? Especially with his large and muscular body, running should be straining for him.
"I want you to give me a hundred push-ups, then the same amount of sit-ups." Chris said, surprisingly he also went down on his knees and a few of us copied him. Chris glared at the ones who remained standing.
"I guess you don't know how to do a push-up? Even Sylvia knows how to." Chris said and I grimaced at his words, why did have to make that stupid comment, it was hard enough being the only girl, attention was the last thing I required.
Matt, Charlie and Dan got down and started to do push-ups like the rest of us. After some minutes when everyone finished and fortunately I still had energy to keep up the pace and wasn't the one who finished last.
"I want a hundred squats and a hundred lunges." Chris said and some of us moaned loudly, me being one of them.
"Don't give that fucking attitude," shouted Chris. "You're going to become fucking soldiers and I want you behave like ones! For fuck's sake if you're complaining about some squats how the fuck are you going to survive fighting BOW:s?" His eyes were wide open, sending off sparks and his mouth in one tight line. Everyone quickly started to do as he requested us and for the rest of the workout we carried on in silence and after a round of burpees Chris allowed us to hit the showers.
Relived of finally getting sleep soon, I stood for what felt like hours in the shower before I forced myself to leave the hot shower but then I remembered Patrick had asked me to practice on using the rifles.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck..." I murmured for myself, rushing to put on my clothes instead of pajama. Patrick was sitting in the white large room with one of the cases on the table, he looked up from the book he was reading as he heard my footsteps.
"You're a little late." He pointed out. "You can take that one, there's lights on outside for about two hours but then you should get some sleep."
I uttered a "thanks", took the case and went outside. The shooting range was lit up by lights from the ground and from the red, white and circular targets kindled the lights underneath. I promised myself I had to practice for at least thirty minutes but just after ten minutes I felt it was necessary to stay longer than half an hour. My eyes began to tear up, I felt miserable, stupid and scared. Why did I do this? I gave out quiet sobs that were blended in with the noise from the quiet rifle each time I shoot, Patrick had put on the suppressor so none would be awaken from the shooting. Eventually I threw the rifle away from me, sat down and covered my face with my hands. I had used at least fifty bullets but kept missing the middle, sometimes even missing the entire target. A sound of someone stepping on a branch scared me and I swiftly got up on my feet.
"Still practicing, huh?" The person asked and stepped forward in the light, it was Chris.
"Mhm," I hummed, picking up the rifle and got in position. I shoot again, completely missing the target. Embarrassed I turned to Chris and stared at him.
"Am I bothering?" He asked.
"Yeah."
"Well, I thought I might help you." He came up to me, put forward his hand for me to hand him the rifle.
"Ok." I said shyly, shivering from the cold night and the thought of being out here with him in the dark night. Why had he come to help me, I thought he wasn't the helpful type and I felt a little angry for not fully being understanding him and him destroying the personality-category I had decided to place him in.
"Look at what I'm doing," he said softly, "you've got to make sure the end of the rifle is pressed near your shoulder, look carefully at the target, take your time to aim right but remember that once you've pulled the trigger the rifle is going to move so it's best that you aim a little under the middle, you know what I mean?" He handed me the rifle.
"Go on."
I got in the same position as he had, then turned to him if anything was wrong but he nodded expressionless. I aimed the way Chris told me and when I've shoot, I had managed to hit the circle before to the middle, that was the closest I had gotten to the middle.
"Well done," said Chris, smiling. It was the first time I saw his smile, it felt special as if he rarely smiled and this was one of the rare occasions he did. The corners of his mouth reaching his glittering eyes, the expression made him look younger and I glared a little too long at him but the smile quickly disappeared when he caught me staring.
"What?" He asked.
"Nothing."
Any thoughts on this chapter? Don't be afraid to let me know, reviews only make wanna write more! :)
