Bucky's POV
I watched as Lilly fell asleep in my arms and despite the events of the last few hours I felt complete with her in my arms i had eased us down to a half lying down position. She played the part of the soldier well I would grant her that but beneath all of that she was one of the greatest victims of Hydra's actions and the war between shield and themselves. "How's she doing Buck" Steve asked running his hand gently over her head, in a really fatherly action, "she's sleeping now, we all know how exhausting all this information can be when thrown at you" she nuzzled herself into my chest and grabbed the blanket off of the sofa arm behind me and covered her and myself with it. "She's strong though she'll get through it" Steve said, clint joined him by his side and looked down at Lilly. She's just a girl, she started younger than Nat for fuck's sake, what kind of life is that?" "she never had a choice though" Natasha added quietly, "but's whats worse for her is she never had a lifestyle of value to lose, this is all she's ever known" despite Natasha's cold demeanour i could see the sadness in her eyes for herself for and for Lilly. The girl in my arms stirred and her palm moved to rest flat on my chest over my heart.
Flashback
Lilly stormed into my room her face red her knuckles bleeding a expression of anger written across her face, she turned sixteen a month ago and I hadn't seen her in a bad mood since. "He's such a dick" she fumed, I raised my eyebrows from where i was led with my head against my metallic arm on my bed, "who?" i questioned "lucas" I suppressed an amused smile, she and Lucas had been at each others throats ever since he had joined three years ago, "whats he done this time?" I asked sitting up and motioning for her to sit beside me on the bed. "He won't grant me access to the RX" "your not even supposed to know about the RX" "well I do and you know what harm could it do to let me see it?" she flopped backwards flinging her arm over her eyes and sighing. I led down beside her my head looking to the left looking at her half covered face i tried to keep the amusement out of my voice but failed miserably "Oh you know blow up half the planet?" she turned her head and removed her arm so we were nearly nose to nose her eyes looking into mine. "I wasn't planning on touching it, I just wanted to have a look" "yeah and I'm pretty sure pigs can fly" i replied. She smiled, "how do you know me so well?" "because your my lil and I'm your shiny soldier" we both laughed. As we calmed down we looked into each others eyes again, her face became calm, I couldn't help but let my eyes trail down to her lips which parted slightly, I looked back into her eyes "when do you have to go back into status?" she asked, and I could hear the sadness in her voice and I pulled her into a hug, she buried her head into my shoulder and I rested my chin on her head, we were still lying down "hopefully it will be a while yet" i said not really sure how to reassure the girl. She pulled away and looked up at me slightly her hand rested on my chest and she looked back down at her hand "it's so calming" "hmm?" "your heartbeat" she explained "its calming,strong and consistant" she said looking up at me with a ghost of a smile on her lips. I smiled at her and leaned down towards her she looked nervous but her head responded by tilting up and our lips connected, with such gentle tenderness i was surprised not thinking myself capable of something so meaning full, my hand raised up and cupped her head in my hand, her hair was soft under my finger tips and i gentle stroked it never taking my lips from hers, she rolled over so she was on top of me straddling my body both my arms slid down her body and I gripped her hips firmly. I couldn't be certain but I thought I heard a slight moan come from her, i smiled as our tongues danced together each of us fighting for dominance. I pulled away for breath and we rested our foreheads against each other, i opened my eyes "We shouldn't be doing this" i panted slightly out of breath. She pulled away gently "I'm sorry" she muttered clambering hastily off of me and running her hands through her hair, pushing it back from her face. "I shouldn't have…. you know forget it happened" I stood up as she flustered around, she put her hands across her face "Oh gosh" I grabbed her wrists and pulled them away from her face despite her resistance. She looked down and I tilted her head up to look at me with my metallic index finger "calm down" i said pulling her close to me, "your so young" i said, she pulled back harshly looking offended "is that what it is, you still think of me as the four year old you met all those years ago on't you" she went to storm out but once again I grabbed her arm "would you let me finish" I asked her, but she still resisted, I flung her on to the bed as gently as I could and pinned her down. She was breathing heavily and she looked pissed off but I had never though she had looked so beautiful, her hair spilled around her head against the stark white pillow looking like honey her lips were swollen from our kiss and her skin looked like porcelain. I looked down at her my own hair falling around me, "now ready to listen?" her only reply was to struggle and I suppressed a smile. "Look I only meant, that there is a bigger age gap than there looks, were from different times its not you its me, ok?" I sighed "how could I think of you as that little girl when you have grown up so beautifully into a woman, yes that's what you were then but I care about what you are now, it just doesn't seem fair that you would settle for a ninety something year old man like me, not only that I am what I am, a killer I can't change that no matter what" she looked up at me and it was then that I felt nervous, only then did i realise that everything was out of my hands, that I had spilled every venerability I felt around her right to her. She pulled her hand free and this time I let her she surprised me when she smiled and cupped my cheek in her hand, i closed my eyes and lent into her touch "your right we shouldn't be doing this" she then guided my head down and our lips connected once more, I rolled onto my side pulling her with me. Pulling away she said quietly "you know I care about you so much, so much it's starting to scare me" I felt he hand run onto the muscle of my metallic arm and grip it tightly. I kissed her again with more force "my feelings for you used to scare me to" she looked shocked "how long have you…?" i played with a strand of her hair, "I don't know, ever since you were little i knew I would protect you with my life, i cared for you so much and I didn't understand it but recently those feelings have well warped into something more something deeper, i don't want to lose you, not ever" she hugged me close and I wrapped my arms around her frame pulling her close.
Present Time
I was breathing heavily and Lilly's hand had balled up in my shirt, the guys were still stood around "Buck did you just remember something?" i nodded "what was it?" Steve asked eagerly always keen to know what I had remembered "time at Hydra" i answer vaguely, this was one memory that was most defiantly not going to be shared as long as I could help it. "Oh" Steve, sounding as though he didn't want to push it any further, Lilly's hand relaxed back to resting flat on my chest. Everyone wandered off and I looked down to Lilly once more, I watched as she sniffed slightly before getting more comfortable in her sleep.
