Chapter VIII

"Keep em' coming," Hermione motioned with her empty glass to the bartender. She and Severus were steadily working through their umpteenth round of drinks.

"It is just too much. I mean, I have never been so humiliated, and I was a death eater!"

"….like a hog at a fair!" she agreed downing another shot.

They both went on like this for the better part of the rest of the day. Hermione didn't go into too many specifics when discussing her interview, but she knew he wasn't happy the moment she caught up with him exiting his physical.

"The nerve of you people!" Severus shouted at the small group of mediwitches that were trying desperately to have him keep his voice down.

"I will not lower my voice you insolent hag! I am not some side show exhibit you can gawk over!"

Hermione had come up and put a hand on his forearm and he calmed down immediately. The look of fear and anger on his face had Hermione turning to give those mediwitches a piece of her mind.

The small group had been taking notes and tittering at Severus as he tried closing his shirt with what little dignity he could muster, he had been mortified.

"How dare you? How dare you treat any of us the way you have? This man is a decorated war hero. How dare you gawk and laugh at him? He deserves your respect, if not your admiration for all he did for the war cause. What did you tossers do? Not a fucking thing, that's what! Does the simple fact we have no desire to help propagate the next race of witches and wizards give you the right to parade us down here to force our hands or legs open for that matter?"

He had never been so aroused in his life.

No one messes with her man, whoa where did that come from?

"Miss Granger, if you would allow us we were just commenting…"

"Oh sod off!" Hermione called back to the mediwitch as she grabbed Snape's hand to lead them out of Saint Mungo's.

Here they were hours later and many, many pints later still fuming about the way they had been treated.

"So what d-did they ask you?" Severus asked as he ran his finger around the rim of his cup and nervously fidgeted with his napkin. He did all he could to not make eye contact with Hermione.

Hermione knew she was drunk and knowing this she should always keep quiet but even as she was telling herself not to answer, it tumbled out of her

"They had the nerve to ask me how many people I had fucked! Can you believe that Severus?"

"W-well what did you tell them?" Snape asked without thinking.

Now it was her turn to shoot an eyebrow up.

"I-I mean you didn't answer them did you?" he tried to recover but it was already out there, he really wanted to know now.

"Well I told them the truth; I didn't think it would be wise to lie as whoever they place me with would know anyway."

"Yeah well me too," Snape agreed. He could not for the life of it figure out what she meant by her answer. There was definitely too much alcohol involved in this conversation.

"You know what Severus?" Hermione continued as she draped her arm on Severus' shoulder. "I think we should stick it to them, we should just marry each other. Yeah, you and I know enough about potions, you can brew something to keep us from conceiving. We can wait it out, then get divorced when this whole thing blows up in their face!" She poked his cheek a bit as so as to prove her point.

Did she really just suggest we get married? Holy shit, what is in these drinks and could he get a case to go?

"Another round please!" he shouted at the bartender. He definitely was not drunk enough for this conversation.

"W-what about the consummation part?" he asked nervously in his sweet baritone voice. Hermione felt a quiver all the way down to her toes.

"Well, I am sure we can figure that out now couldn't we? I am sure a worldly man like yourself knows enough about that to make it worth both our whiles?" she answered, her voice husky with desire.

Me worldly? Ha! If she only knew that he had only managed to go around the world in 80 days with his own hand. This would be a disaster, but it was sweet, delicious Hermione. His smart, sexy, funny, captivating Gryffindor lioness who had become his friend. He felt at ease with her. Hermione, that made him harder than an icicle. Oh what the hell, he'd cross that bridge when they got there; there were enough books out there for him to find something to teach him what to do. Maybe he could ask Lucius.

"You know what Granger; you have a deal, let's do it!"

Oh my Gods, did he just agree to what I think he did? Holy shit woman, you just reeled in the sexy, snarky, wickedly intelligent potions master Severus Snape! What is in these drinks? Sweet Merlin, what the hell was she going to do now? He is surely expecting me to have lots of experience. Sure I talk a big game, but what am I going to do? I hope he has enough experience for both of us because I am at a loss, maybe a book, yes! Books have never let me down in the past. A book would offer a solution.

"Great! Let's go back to the castle and in the morning we will owl the ministry to let them know!"

"Lead the way fiancé," he gestured to the door letting her pass. The gentlemanly gesture allowed him a very nice view of her backside.

"Severus, if you want to look as my arse you need not be so Slytherin about it"

"I rather thought you might think less of me if I asked."

"Git!" My git!

"Wench!" My wench!


After a trip to the toilet and a dose of the hangover potion that Severus had left for her on her nightstand, she managed to dress and head towards the Great Hall. Severus had been waiting in her sitting room to escort her to breakfast.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, still wincing at the own sound of his voice. Tequila was a bitch and they had certainly been fucked by her the day before.

"Arrgg, normally your voice would make me quiver but at the moment it sounds like nails being run across a blackboard, I need coffee," she rubbed her temples as she stumbled into her chair at breakfast.

"I will endeavor to remember that Granger."

Dammit the verbal diarrhea strikes again.

"How did you sleep?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper.

"Oh my Gods, I was so pissed. I can't even remember how we got back from the pub," she smiled. Her eyes were still hooded from sleep but her face was alive with mirth. She was excited about their foray to the ministry later this morning to announce their engagement; they were really going to let them have it.

"Same here," he responded a smile making its way to the corner of his mouth.

"Careful Severus, the students might actually think you're human."

"Real funny Granger, don't quit your day job!"

"If we are going to do this we need to hurry and get down to the ministry, if they send their selections before we have a chance to petition them, we will be forced to marry our ministry approved choices." Hermione worried her bottom lip as she poured herself a second cup of coffee and one for Severus.

"You are right, let's go right after breakfast."

Before they could even add the cream to their cups the mail came in. Dozens of owls spread across the hall distributing their cargo to the students who anxiously awaited news from home. Two owls however seemed to have other recipients in mind as they dropped letters in front of Severus and Hermione.

The seals on both letters indicated that they were from the ministry.

It was too late.

They shot looks at the letters, then each other.

"Maybe if we don't open them, then we cannot be bound by it?" Hermione asked her eyes wide with hope.

"I want to see you try to ignore a missive from the Ministry Granger, you would be more successful ignoring a summons from the Dark Lord!"

"I refuse to open it, and I suggest you do the same."

No sooner had they tossed their letters into the fire in the great hall, two more owls came in and dropped two more letters, with similar seals, addressed to Severus and Hermione respectively.

They both stared at each other while receiving their fair share of looks from both the staff and the students in the great hall.

The letters went into the fire again as Hermione and Severus hurried to down their coffees and make it out the door to the apparition point before being confronted by two more owls. This time however, they could not toss their letters as they began to smoke as they burst open and began to howl.

With some foolish wand waving, Severus destroyed both of them before they could shout out their news.

"That was a close one, smooth move Severus."

"Don't mention it Granger"

They hurried out of the castle and were soon at the ministry only to be handed the letters in person when they tried to file a petition.

"Shit!"

"Fuck!"

"We should have come yesterday Granger!"

"We were too pissed at the time to barely walk, let alone come back here. Don't you dare blame me, Severus Snape!"

She stomped off and Severus was left alone in the hallway of the ministry. Letter in hand, still unopened.

"Congratulations Professor Snape" a ministry ex-student of his said as he passed him in the hall and saw the letter of commitment.

"Oh sod off!" He barked at the interloper as he turned to head out after his little Gryffindor.

He saw his one chance for happiness leaving in a whirl of wild hair and fury. Gods she was beautiful when she was angry.


She didn't know how she didn't splinch herself getting back to the castle. Her tears were all but blinding her; they had been too late to stop this atrocity of the ministry.

She tossed the letter atop her armoire and threw herself onto the bed. It was Sunday, there weren't any classes and all she wanted to do was sleep, at least while she dreams, Severus is with her.

Her one chance of happiness seemed to have faded in a whirl of black robes and silky hair. Gods he was sexy, all black robes and stern face.

She punched her pillow a few times for good measure and quickly found a restless sleep.

She would not open the letter until she absolutely had to.


Sitting in front of the fire in his rooms, bottle of Ogden's on his side table and the amber liquid in his cup, Severus stared at the unopened letter on his coffee table.

This was a nightmare, this just couldn't be happening.

They had been so close.

Why hadn't he had the courage to bring it up days ago?

Hell, he should have swept her off her feet the moment she walked up to the castle dragging her familiar and her luggage. Hermione had been on his mind for such a long time, she had been a difficult student yes, but brilliant and he had secretly admired her brilliance from afar. As she grew into a beautiful woman, he had admired a lot more about her.

She was beautiful and it had been her idea! He hadn't even been able to voice the idea when she just blurted out the solution. He was daft to not have taken her right there to the minister and married her on the spot! Now, he would be saddled with some bearded lady with ten cats and a bird.

He was going to be miserable.

He hated birds.

Several glasses later, the letter was still unopened.

The following morning they headed off to class, neither one acknowledging the other too much for fear of a repeat of the outbursts at the ministry.

She smiled softly at him. He missed her.

His eyes never left her as she walked out of the great hall. She missed him.


But it was for the best that they start to put some distance between them before they married their chosen partners. It would not look too good if they were constantly around each other while betrothed or married to others.

Severus decided he would wait until he absolutely had to open the letter. He refused to be bullied into it.

Hermione was also determined to open it on her own time.

She wondered if he wanted to do it at the same time, that way they could soften the blow.

Severus decided he would go to see her to ask her if she wanted to open the letter together, maybe over a bottle of Firewhisky to drown their collective sorrows.

When Friday night rolled around Severus found himself staring at her door wondering if the wards had been changed, he was relieved they hadn't been, he was still welcomed.

"Hermione?"

"Come on back here, I am in the bath."

'Oh good Gods, what did I do in a past life to deserve the site before me', he thought to himself as he crossed the threshold to the large bathroom just in time to see Hermione getting out of the bathtub.

The water glistened over her luscious breasts as small patches of bubbles still clung to her delicious hips and legs.

'What he wouldn't give to be a towel right at that second!'

"I-I-m so sorry Hermione." He turned his face away as he backed up into the adjacent room, humiliated that he had witnessed that scene.

The tent was rapidly expanding in his trousers and he thanked Circe that he had his robes still on to cover the quickly rising need to take her and dry her with his tongue.

Wrapping herself in her bathrobe and sashaying out of her bathroom she smiled devilishly at Severus' reaction.

"If you wanted to see me naked Severus, you only had to ask." She gave him a quick kiss on his rapidly reddening cheek while patting him on the chest.

"You have no shame woman!" he tried to sound affronted, he was anything but.

"And you love that about me don't you, Professor?"

The sound of her using his title almost had him coming in his trousers. The woman was too much for him. He suddenly realized it may have been a mistake to have come there tonight.

"I think I better leave Hermione."

She turned back to face him as she poured herself a drink, her eyes glistening with unshed tears, her hair wild from her bath. His breath caught.

Dear Merlin she is beautiful.

The flames from the fireplace lit her features and bought highlights to the mane of wild that was her hair. She looked like a small lioness waiting to pounce. But her eyes were sad. He didn't like to see her like that, he wondered if he was the cause of it.

"No Severus, please don't leave. We need to do this, let's just get it over with."

For a moment his heart raced as he wondered what exactly she had in mind.

"I mean we have fought it, ignored it and dragged it out. I mean, I don't see how we can resist anymore."

"I agree," he struggled to swallow the lump in his throat as he realized she was moving closer to him. Her lips dancing on the rim of the glass, her tongue darting out to taste the liquor. He found his body was meeting her halfway already.

"It was inevitable really. We knew this day would come and this would happen. The tension is killing me. We cannot wait anymore Severus," she placed her hand on his chest, her eyes looking up at him.

He could feel the heat coming of her body mixed with the sweet smell of calla lilies and vanilla. He reached out, fisting a handful of bathrobe at her waist and pulling her a bit closer.

"Yes, yes, let's do it."

He leaned his head down.

"Okay, let's open the letters together."

Fuuuuuuuuuccccckkkkk!