#8

A/N: Duh Duh Duh Duh it's time for the talk

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When I saw him I felt a new wave of pain hit. He didn't let his face show it but I saw it in his eyes that he was happy to see me.

"Where's the kid?" he asked once he was seated.

"He's at Lyla and Opie's. We need to talk Happy," I told him.

"What about? Something wrong with Ma?" he questioned tone laced with worry.

"Last I talked to her she was fine. I had a visitor yesterday after I dropped Vic off at school," I began feeling my heart in chest and my throat get tighter.

"Who?"

"Her name is Carrie, she's pregnant Happy and she says it's yours. Before you say it could be some random whore at the club I already checked. She's a waitress at a diner outside of Bakersfield and she's not one of the club sluts. The last time you went and visited your Mother is when the child was conceived. Do you remember when that was?" I asked keeping my face blank.

I watched as the realization slowly came to him. He remembered who and when and where I was talking about. When he looked at me his eyes were filled with regret and pain.

"Lela, I'm . . ." he began.

"Don't Happy please just don't. I've spent the last couple of days trying to figure out what to do but seeing you realize that you created a child with another woman while ours was dead. I just . . . I don't know if I can do this anymore Happy," I told him as I felt a tear roll down my face.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I can handle you putting your dick into other pussy because even though we never talked about it we both knew that any of your kids were going to be ours. You always came home to me no matter how late and I diluted myself into thinking that was some sort of loyalty. But this, seeing that woman carrying your child it just broke something inside of me."

"Lela baby I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen, you have to believe me," he begged.

"I do and I guess that hurts more. You didn't even try with this woman and yet you got her pregnant. But we've been trying for years and nothing."

"This doesn't change how I feel."

"That may be true but it's changed a lot about how I look at you. I love you and I always will Happy, but it's just . . . I can't do this anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"The rest of your sentence I'm going to take the time to think about things. I'll have someone bring Vic up when they can, but I won't be coming back."

"Because some gash says I got her pregnant?"

"That and you were screwing someone else while I was having yet another miscarriage and I needed you. I don't ask you for much Happy and I never have, I think that's why we have lasted so long. But I needed you as I sat in that bath tub and just bled out. I needed you to be there to tell me that it would be okay and that you loved me even though I lost yet another one of our babies. So I'm going to go, Vic will be up next weekend," I told him before walking out of the visitation room.

I ignored the pain in my chest till I got in my care. I couldn't believe I had just told him that. I had only been with him since I was eighteen I didn't know how to not be with him.

I spent the silent drive forcing my tears back inside. I didn't need to look like how I felt, not till I got Vic and we went back home. Pulling up to Lyla's house I saw a couple of bikes, sighing I got out and went to the front door.

"Hello?" I called out as I walked in.

"Vic your Mom's here," I heard Opie call out.

"How was the visit?" Opie questioned as he walked into the hallway.

"It was a visit. Why does it matter?" I asked crossing my arms against my chest.

"Lyla told me some of what happened."

"No offense but this isn't any of your business. My marriage and anything having to do with it are mine and Happy's business not yours or the clubs," I told him as Vic came running up.

"Mama," he yelled running up to me.

"Hi baby. Let's go home," I said giving him a smile as I grabbed his hand.

"Tell Lyla I said thanks for watching him for me," I told Opie before we walked out the door.

"Did you have fun baby?" I asked Vic as we walked to the car.

"Yeah, we played video games. Piper and Kenny are better than me though," he said as I opened his door and he got in.

"Well they are older than you baby. Besides you beat me at video games when we play," I told him with a smile before closing the door.

The short drive home Vic told me about his day. It was something as simple as that that made me smile. Hearing my son talk about his day and how he played video games with the boys and house with Ellie. Pulling up to the house I felt a little lighter about my decision with Happy.

"Mama can I play in the sprinkler?" he asked as we walked inside the house.

"Sure go change baby and I'll set it up," I told him as I sat my purse on the kitchen counter.

Hearing him run to his room I grabbed my cigarettes and lighter from my purse and walked to the sliding glass backdoor. Opening it I sat them on the table by my chair and walked to the water spigot turning it on before I walked back inside to get Vic a towel.

"You ready baby?" I asked as I grabbed a towel from the hall closet.

"Yeah!" he yelled running past me to the backyard.

Walking through the kitchen I got a beer and listened as my phone started to ring. Looking at my purse I sighed and grabbed the piece of technology. I saw that it was the prison and pressed ignore.

Going back outside I sat on the chair as Vic ran through the sprinkler and lit a cigarette. Breathing in I let the smoke fill my lungs before I blew out.

"Mama can we have chicken nuggets for dinner?" he asked after an hour.

"Baby it's only four. You still have a couple hours till dinner time," I told him as I lit my fourth cigarette.

"But can we have them?" he asked leaning into me.

"Yes we can. Are you done with the sprinkler?" I asked him as I looked over his body trying to see if he needed more sunscreen.

"Yeah. Can we get a puppy?" he asked as I wrapped him up in a towel.

"Why a puppy?" I asked laughing at his randomness.

"Because Peter from school got one because his Daddy left him too," he replied as I turned him to face me.

"Baby your Daddy is coming back. Peter's situation is a bit different than yours," I told him as I rubbed his shoulders.

"Daddy still left though."

"But Daddy is coming back Vic. He loves you very much and if he could he'd be right here with us. But if you still want the dog I will look into it," I told him before kissing his forehead.

Stubbing out the cigarette I got up and grabbed my phone which had long been turned off and the pack of cigarettes and lighter.

"Let's go inside and you will shower and I'll put some after sun on you," I told him as I opened the door.

After the shower and lotion I turned on some cartoons and went to start the oven. Grabbing the cigarettes and lighter again I went back outside this time leaving the door open so that I could hear the oven go off.

As I took a drag I heard the back gate open.

"Well your alive," I heard Gemma say.

"What do you want Gemma?" I asked after blowing out the smoke.

"People have been trying to call you. Apparently your little chat with your husband caused some shit. Care to explain?" she asked sitting down next to me.

"Why does it matter? You're here to tell me to stop being selfish and to be a good old lady and be there for my man while he's on the inside, am I right?" I questioned with raised eyebrows as I looked at her and brought the cigarette back to my lips.

"Something like that." She said smirking at me.

"Well my husband can go to hell for all care. He's in deep shit and needs to learn to deal with it by himself," I told her as I blew out and tapped away the ash.

"What'd he do baby?" she finally asked after a quiet pause.

"Got another bitch pregnant. So your speech you can shove it, I can tolerate a lot of shit from him and I have over the years. But this, this is something I have to ask myself if I can deal with. Can you take Vic down there next weekend?" I asked bringing the cigarette back to my lips.

"I'll work something out. You know what you're going to do yet about the other bitch and the kid?"

"It happened while he was at his mom's the week I had my miscarriage. I told him I'm not seeing him till after he gets out, I have to think about this shit Gemma. I mean this might just be what breaks us," I told her.

Before she could respond the oven beeped and I went inside to make the chicken nuggets. After the timer was set I went back outside with a beer in hand.

"I'm going to get going baby. Next time Clay calls I'll tell him to let Hap know you're thinking through shit," she said getting up and walking back to the gate.

Hearing it open and close I sat there looking at the single tree in the back yard. I sat there drinking beer and staring till the timer went off again.