Chapter 8: It Finally Snaps
How? How could he have subconsciously predicted his own voice problems? How was it possible? Was the woman Cameron? "You've got two days." Sounds like something he would say. He just had to avoid her for long enough so that his voice would return to normal, then he'd fire her. Picturing the memory of the voices, he mentally locked it tight so he wouldn't lose it. He wouldn't allow it, for the sake of his own sanity.
(One day later)
Lying in his hospital bed under the pale blue hypoallergenic sheets, watching General Hospital on the room TV, he was comfortable. He remained the same way for most of the day, eating his meals and making small talk with Wilson. Later that night, at the minutes before sunset, Cameron stopped by at the end of her work shift. House was already asleep, so she gently put her hand on his shoulder, and he jerked awake violently. Groaning, he turned to face his disturber.
Through blue eyes...
I froze. The confusion of being awoken lingering with me, I was defenseless. Staring into the gorgeous green circles that were her irises, I lost all that was left of my emotional cover. My mind went completely blank. My stiff, surprise-tensed muscles relaxed. My mouth gaped. The floodgates of my repressed thoughts opened. My god, I thought, she's beautiful. And how she was. Though her hair was hastily done up in a ponytail, he clothes were wrinkled and unkempt and her eyes were still slightly puffy and bloodshot from worrying over me, all I could see was her porcelain skin and her beautiful eyes, which were dilated and glazed over, like instead of looking at me, she was looking into me.
"What?" Was all I could manage. Her eyes snapped back into focus. She smiled, and I still couldn't help but stare at her. She had got me when I was most vulnerable, and I was helpless. Her voice was as smooth and soft as velvet over bare skin.
"Hi, House," She whispered, her voice hypnotising me. Realizing I was being done in by her feminine charms, I quickly rebuilt my wall of defenses, mentally screwing the cap back on my tightly packed bottle of emotions. Reverting to my cold, usual self, I replied, "I was trying to sleep. Go away." She frowned, searching for the better House of 10 seconds ago, but he was gone. She moved close to me, trying to seduce me back. But by then, misanthropy was king in my psyche. She breathed slowly, the cool currents of air caressing my face. Her face hardened, frustrated, and she left, her heels clacking on the floor. I saw her wipe tears from her eyes as she pushed open the glass door.
and through green...
He froze. Still shaking the sleep from his eyes, he was unable to set up his defenses. I stared blankly into his blue eyes, which were darker and greyer in the evening light shining through the windows. I watched as his whole body relaxed, the tense muscles in his forehead smoothing out. My god, I thought for the thousandth time, he's handsome. Though his eyes were bloodshot, and his hair and face were more frazzled than usual, all I could see was his blank face and those eyes. There were clouded over and distant, like he was looking into my soul.
"What?" His voice was crackling and rough, but it was still music to my ears. Coming out of my reverie, I smiled tenderly. Without anything to hold his emotions back, I saw a smile tug at the corners of his mouth. I whispered, all the adoration and love I was feeling sliding past my vocal chords.
"Hi, House." For a moment, I felt terribly awkward and anxious, and he chose that split second to switch back to his emotionless, sarcastic bstard mode. In the same way my voice radiated love, his screamed hatred. "I was trying to sleep. Go away." It felt like a jagged knife had been stabbed through my still beating heart. I reeled internally, and leaned in close to him, our faces mere inches from one another. Oh, how I longed to kiss him right then, to profess my feelings as strongly as I could. I saw goose bumps appear on his neck, but his face was unchanging. Defeated, I left his bed, tears streaming uncontrollably from my eyes; I walked, sobbing, out the door. F you, House, I thought, I'm done trying.
through blue eyes...
What have I done!? I thought. Has my brain conquered my mind? Have I worked so hard to become someone I'm truly not that it's overcome me? I'm not usually this cruel, so why am I now? I remembered all the abuse and let-downs I had put Cameron through. How could I have done that to her? How could she possibly forgive me? I didn't know at that time if I loved her, but it amazed me that I had been in denial of my true feelings for so long. I searched my mind for a second, and realized something was missing. A memory, something of significance to me. I ran through the previous days events. The horrible morning I had, the PMS Woman, My talk with Wilson, my fall in his office, the MRI, that worst fall that ended me up here, and the aftermath, including the rather boring events of the day. Something was missing.
I dismissed the thought, focusing on Cameron. I had to come up to her, tell her I was sorry, tell her how lovely she was to me... I had to find her, tell her I needed her, tell her I set us apart. I couldn't spend the rest of my life knowing I hadn't tried. I tore the electrolyte IV out of the back of my hand and limped/ran through the halls of PPTH, ignoring the excruciating pain his leg sent me.
A/N: For emotional purposes, and also because it's my favorite song, imagine Coldplay's "The Scientist" in the background.
Come
up to meet you,
Tell you I'm sorry,
You don't know how lovely
you are.
I had to find you,
Tell you I need you,
Tell you
I set you apart.
Tell me your secrets,
And ask me your
questions,
Oh let's go back to the start.
Runnin' in
circles,
Comin' up tails,
Heads on the science apart.
Nobody
said it was easy,
It's such a shame for us to part.
Nobody said
it was easy,
No one ever said it would be so hard.
Oh take me
back to the start.
I was just guessin',
At numbers and
figures,
Pullin' the puzzles apart.
Questions of science,
Science and progress,
Do not speak as loud as my heart.
Tell
me you love me,
Come back and haunt me,
Oh on I rush to the
start.
Runnin' in circles,
Chasin' our tails,
Comin' back
as we are.
Nobody said it was easy,
Oh it's such a shame for us
to part.
Nobody said it was easy,
No one ever said it would be
so hard.
I'm goin' back to the start.
I found her in my office, practically bawling her eyes out. A more saddening sight had never been seen by my eyes. She saw me, and immediately balled her hands into fists until they shook. Seeing her angry, my brain automatically holed itself back up in my cruel side, and I was transformed into the "Me" I hated so much now. She glared at me with such hatred I physically recoiled.
"Cameron," I breathed, "Listen to me, please, I-"
"No!" She screamed. "You listen to me, Greg! This is the last bloody time! It mystifies why you still beat me away! At the very least, you could show some compassion, but NO! Now, this heart is past the breaking point! It's torn in two! I'm finished! Congratulations!" She paused to draw a breath and I cut in, saying words I didn't want to say, my voice hoarse and raspy.
"Dammit, Cameron-"
"Well, If you don't give a sh!t about me, then why do you trap me here!?" I snarled and retorted,
"Because I want you here to do what you're supposed to! If you know I don't need you here, then why do you insist on staying?"
"Because-"
"I've been waiting to get rid of you since I realized..." She was sobbing now, "Ever since I realized your feelings for me, and now I have no choice... You've got two days." She looked me straight in the eyes.
"You want to know why I stay?"
"Yes! Why would you stay and ruin your heart trying to get through to me?"
"Because I love you!" My mouth opened, and before I could stop myself, I yelled,
"I don't care!" Liquid sadness pouring from her tear ducts, she threw her arms around my neck and gave me the saddest, most passionate kiss I'd ever experienced. At least if I couldn't express myself verbally, I could physically. I responded with so much force it surprised both of us. We were linked stronger than we had ever been, and my body screamed with happiness that I had finally released the feelings I'd been holding in. My bad side retreated, defeated. I tasted a tang in her saliva, oddly familiar. I pulled back, confused, and removed my hands from the back of Cameron's head. As I let go of her, I noticed she was swaying on the spot, her eyelids flickering strangely. I said the words my mind was so longing for me to speak:
"I'm sorry. For everything. I... I love you too." And then I realized what it all was.
"Oh..." We muttered simultaneously. Cameron collapsed the ground, an empty Vicodin bottle rolling out of her now unclenched hand. My leg screamed with pain, and I fell straight through the glass behind me. As I watched glass fly everywhere and foam starting to collect at the corners of Cameron's mouth, a single tear rolled down my cheek amid the chaos.
Hmmm... How Shakespeare-esque. Then nothing.
