I'm actually raping this story! It used to be ok, now it's just awful! Anyway I thought we all deserved more smut, especially after all we got was some smiling, hand-holding and a tiny bit of nuzzling in the first time episode... Although I have to admit I did spill my drink all over myself and didn't even notice until the episode had ended.


Did you know if you type a less than sign followed by (") in a facebook message a penguin pops up? I didn't know this either until tonight, but that's how bored I was. I spent hours creating armies of penguins, there were literally thousands of them, and for some strange reason they reminded me of Kurt. I don't know what that was all about; maybe he'd mentioned them to me in a parallel universe or something...

I'm not sure if it was because I was thinking of Kurt, or if I have a weird sexual 'thing' for penguins but I immediately found myself getting hard. I was getting hard a lot these days. Kurt had taken over about 99% of my thoughts, and the other 1% was chiffon scarves, so you can see why I had a constant erection.

I picked up the phone. Time to put things right. It had nothing to do with the fact that I wanted some attention... honestly it wasn't. It's because you make better decisions when you've got an erection. You're so distracted by your penis that your mind is pretty much clear, and you can make a split-decision without over-analysing it. That's what I told myself anyway... and what scientist was going to test that theory?


I was distraught. In fact distraught is an understatement. I was hysterically deleting all the Blaine pictures I'd saved on my laptop screaming "knob" as I pressed the x key on every one... oh yes I was doing them all individually. It felt much better that way. I guess that was the 21st century version of burning things.

I was so upset and I had my Celine Dion CD on so loud that I almost didn't notice my cell phone ringing. Of course when I saw it was Blaine I had to turn the CD off and try and calm my voice so that it sounded like I was completely indifferent to the whole situation.

"What?" I answered in what I hoped was my most composed and together voice, although I have to admit it was a little snappy... just a little.

"Kurt I er... I wanted to ask you something."

"Hmph." I mumbled crossly, deleting another one of his pictures and feeling oh so good about it. If he thought he was having threesomes with me in some public lavatory he was mistaken.

"Would you be my boyfriend?"

Well that was the last question I was expecting! Did that mean he'd dumped the other guy? Had he chosen me?

"I mean you don't have to answer right away..." Blaine sounded nervous. "but I'll give up Harry Potter for you. I was being stupid. I'll pretty much do anything for you."

"You'll give up Harry Potter for me? Blaine..." I laughed. "You really don't have to do that."

Sometimes I worry I'm bipolar. My dire mood was almost completely lifted.

"I thought that's what you wanted?"

"Huh?"

"I said I thought that's what you wanted?"

"I know but... what? Why?" I know I had no interest in the fictional wizard but I wasn't that bothered. And I sure as hell wasn't jealous or anything - after all he was fictional, and he was a wizard! There was absolutely no chance of him sending anyone into a state of orgasmic bliss... unless... oh so THAT'S why Blaine had a wand!

"You specifically said I had to give him up if I wanted to be with you... so you tell me?"

What the hell was he on tonight? "I have no idea what you're talking about!"

"That's the reason I stormed off at your house! That's the reason I got home and cried a little bit! That's the reason I've spent the last hour taking all of my Harry Potter posters down... which made my cry all over again!"

"Blaine..." Ok I'm a little slow when it comes to boys, I'm usually all wrapped up in my own little world of Kurt, but the penny was starting to drop. "I was talking about your boyfriend... the one that does karate?"

"What? I don't have a boyfriend... I don't even know anybody who does karate."

"But you said..." Oh god I was going to have to admit it wasn't I? I'd rung him up in the middle of the night with an erection. The shame. "you told me your boyfriend was there when I rang you up."

"Huh? When? Was I drunk?"

"No it was... it was at 4:00 in the morning..." I trailed off, closing my eyes and exhaling as I finally got that off my chest.

Silence.

"I'm sorry I rang you..."

"That was you? You were my 4:00am psycho rapist that followed me to school?"

"Well I wouldn't go THAT far..."

Blaine laughed. "Oh my god Kurt why didn't you say something?"

"Because I was embarrassed." ...Please no more questions, please no more questions!

"Well why were you ringing me at 4:00am in the first place?" Damn! Blaine sounded amused.

"Because I just did."

"Ah." He sniggered. "Well that's weird because I'd just been dreaming about you."

Silence.

"Ok that's the point where you're supposed to jump in and tell me the real reason you rang..."

"Blaine... that was the real reason. I was tired and I just wasn't thinking!"

"Oh." He'd stopped laughing. "Yeah I totally made that dream thing up..."

My turn to laugh.

Eventually I did admit that I had dreamt about him, that I'd rung him hard, that I'd rubbed myself off against the sheets. It was incredibly awkward and I kept stumbling over my words, but I didn't have much time to get embarrassed about it because Blaine immediately blurted out:

"I rang you hard."

I felt my penis twitch. "You... you what?"

"Just now... I rang you hard."

"Oh." I was lost for words, trying to ignore the problem rising in my underwear. "Are you...? Are you still...?"

"To be honest it's got worse."


It was difficult to ignore it now. I mean it's always difficult to ignore an erection, but I guess when you're talking directly about it to your super hot boyfriend then it's pretty much impossible. In fact, if you're talking directly about it then you're not trying to ignore it at all. You're trying to draw attention to it. You're trying to get your super hot boyfriend to talk dirty to you and sort you out. But he's not getting the hint.

"Kurt... could you... could you tell me about your dream? In detail."

I heard him gulp. "I'm not sure I can remember it that well..."

"Try?"

"Blaine, are you going to... touch yourself?" He asked nervously, his voice almost a whisper now.

"You don't mind do you?"

"No." He answered so quickly I think he shocked even himself. "I mean that actually sounds... kind of nice..." he quickly shut up.

"Tell me then...?"

He took a deep breath, pausing for a moment to gather his thoughts. "I think I was trapped. I mean I wasn't really trapped, you'd not tied me down or anything, but I just couldn't move."

I liked this story.

"and you just appeared... between my legs..."

I REALLY liked this story.

"and you ran your hands over me lightly... over my cock."

I moaned, my hand automatically sliding into my boxers, mimicking the light touches Kurt had mentioned. "I like it when you say cock." I breathed, my fingers curling around my erection, all set to go.

"I erm..."

I'd clearly made him feel awkward. I couldn't stop the grin from spreading across my face; there was nothing I liked more than making him squirm a little.

"Tell me what you like to do to your cock."

"Blaine... I don't really... like to... you know." I could hear him shuffling on the other end, his discomfort obvious.

"Why don't you do it now?"

"No I really don't think..."

"I know you're hard I can hear your breathing."

He inhaled sharply, as if this was going to cover it up.

"You don't have to pretend you don't like it Kurt."

He let out a tiny repressed whimper that went straight to my cock.

"Go on. Touch yourself... I am."

He yelped and I took this as a good sign, immediately starting to tug gently at my erection.

"So let's try again? Tell me what you like to do to your cock."

"I... I like it rough..." He stuttered, his breathing suddenly becoming much faster.

I held back a moan, my eyes squeezed tightly shut as I imagined Kurt masturbating. The image was driving me insane.

"Do you like it when I'm rough with you?" I panted, having to slow my hand down.

"Yesss." He breathed. "In... in my dreams you press me down..."

"Fuck." I whispered. I think he heard.

"or you... you grab me..."

I bit my lip to stop myself from swearing again.

"you grab my hips...and you force me to... oh fuck" He was clearly just as into this fantasy as I was. It took him a few seconds to find his voice again. "you force me to rub against you..."

"Holy shit." I bucked up into my hand in excitement, unable to stop the moans from pouring out of my lips.

"I... I get really sore because... when I wake up I've been fucking the sheets..."

"FUCKING HELL KURT." My whole body jolted at the thought, my eyes shooting open as I tried to register what he had just said.

"Is that... is that weird?" He panted. I really hoped we weren't about to have a counselling session.

"It's fucking hot." I shot back. "Tell me... tell me more please?"

"You get me... you get me really worked up." He moaned again, I wondered what his free hand was up to, whether it was probing his arse like mine was. "You tease me... you wrap your tongue around my cock... your fingers... you push them inside me... and I... I can't..."

"Shit..." I squeaked as I worked my fingers into my hole.

"I can't take it... because... ooh fuck Blaine... I want you so bad."

"You can have me..." I groaned desperately. "Please Kurt... whatever you want..."

"Ooh..." It sounded like he was smothering his excited yelps into the pillows.

My hand was pulling on my cock so roughly it was starting to hurt, my whole body aching for release. I loved that feeling. I wanted to hold on to it for as long as I could.

"What are you thinking right now?" I panted. "What are you doing to me?"

"I'm fucking you." His voice was shaking.

"Ah..." I thrust my fingers inside myself to try and match his fantasy. "More Kurt..."

"Blaine..." He gulped. "What are you... what are you doing to yourself over there?"

"I've got my fingers... up my arse..." I couldn't believe I was admitting this. "pretending they're you..."

"Oooh... Blaine that's..." He let out another moan and seemed to turn away from the speaker. He was having his own little private orgasm.

"Ah... Kurt!" I gasped "Harder..." I opened my legs wider, my fingers thrusting in deeper.

There was a muffled cry and a few expletives. If I had to guess I would say he was coming.

Both my hands were aching but I wasn't about to stop any time soon. Kurt's satisfied moans were constantly flowing down the phone line and driving me closer to the edge. I pushed my fingers in as far as they would go and dragged them out roughly, whimpering Kurt's name.

"Please Kurt. Please more..."

I did it again, my whole body tensing as I grasped my cock a little too tightly.

"Uh..."

I tilted my head back.

"Uh... right there..."

I felt my stomach tightening, my body shaking as my fingers continued to fuck my hole.

"Ah... ah... Kurt... please... ah..."

I managed to slide another finger in, my cock straining desperately for release.

"fuck... ah... aah... AH!"

I was coming. I don't think I'd ever come like that before. I pulled at the bedcovers, ripping them from their corners, burying my face in the material to try and smother all the noise seeping from my lips. I have no idea what I said. I couldn't comprehend any of it.

"Blaine?" Kurt had obviously made a quick recovery.

I moaned an "mmm?" down the phone in reply as I began to regain my composure.

"I never answered your question..."

"What do you like to do to your cock?" I questioned, confused. I was fairly sure he had answered that. In fact I'd memorised most of that speech for later.

"Noo..." he laughed. "I'd like to be your boyfriend."

"Oh! That far more important question!"

"I hope that's not sarcasm I..."

'CLICK'

"Blaine?"

"Crap."

"Oh you're still there it sounded like you hung up."

"CRAP!"

"What's wrong?"

"Fucking hell! Fucking hell Kurt!"

"Seriously what?"

"Did you just hear that? Someone just hung up!" I had that tight feeling in my stomach, that tight sickly feeling you get when you think you've lost your wallet, or when you realise you left your umbrella at home and it's about to rain on your perfectly gelled hair, or when you discover one of your parents has just heard you masturbating over someone else's cock.

"You mean someone else was on the line?"

"Yes Kurt! Do I have to spell it out for you? Someone else was on the fucking line! It sure as hell wasn't anyone at your house because I rang your cell... fuck Kurt! What am I going to do?"

"Maybe it's not that bad..."

"What part of having my fingers up my arse and begging you to fuck me isn't that bad!"

"Ok so maybe it is bad..."

"Oh my god... oh my god! " I kept replaying the conversation back in my head and it got worse every time. My heart was pounding so fast I could hardly hear Kurt trying to reassure me. This was without a doubt the worst moment of my life, and I'd been caught wanking boys off. The moment I had to tell my parents about that little mishap in front of the head teacher held the previous title... but this one had now claimed the top spot.

I guess now was as good a time as any to go through my suicidal stage.


Ok so I'm hoping I can recover this with a dramatic confrontational chapter 9. If not I can always make Blaine kill himself and put an end to it! Nice to have a back-up.