Author's Note: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY! And oh my God! I am so sorry it's taken this long! :( I know, I suck, kill me now...HOPEFULLY this chapter makes it up for all the long months wait. Oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY SILVER! WE LOVE YOU!


Chapter Eight: No Sanctuary

Even though the storm had subsided, the rain sadly had not. In fact I swear to Arceus it got worse the minute I stepped out of the Pokemon Centre.

Great...now I would be soaked, and would probably catch a cold. Hooray for me...

Sighing to myself I walked towards my apartment, hearing my boots squelch in the puddles underneath my feet. The sky was still covered in thick, ominous clouds, but at least the thunder and lightning had gone. That was a relief. As the rain literally hammered down, my clothes were starting to stick to every inch of my body. Strands of my hair were clinging to my face, and I did not like it one bit.

So, first thing to do when I got home? Have a much needed hot shower, and change my clothes. Then, if Gold was still squatting in my apartment, kick him out. And finally, make some hot soup and watch depressing programmes until bed time. That sounded like a plan.

I could vaguely see the outline of my apartment coming into view, which was a relief. Being out in this rain was doing me no favours right now. My whole body shivered, and briskly I rubbed my arms, trying to get warmer. Now I wondered if I should have stayed in the Pokemon Centre, at least there I was dry and warm.

Okay, I would have had Cyan for company, but I could deal with that.

But it was too late now, I was almost home. Deep inside however I felt a little conflicted about everything.

What if Gold was still there, and was waiting for me? He might have been worried, what with that horrendous storm and everything. But why did I care? He SHOULD be worried! Hell he broke my heart without a care in the world!

I sighed heavily, feeling the rain soak me even more. I wanted to hate him, I really did. But I couldn't, and I just knew that when I eventually did see him again I would probably end up forgiving him. Maybe Cyan had a point. If we compromised we might be able to salvage something from this horrible emotional mess. Maybe. It was worth a shot at least.

Eventually when I reached my apartment I was soaked to the bone and my hair was a matted mess, sticking to the sides of my face in all directions, and instead of it being a bright red, it now looked a dirty crimson colour.

Ew.

I shoved my hand into my jeans pocket and retrieved my keys. Hastily pushing them into the lock I opened the door, and pushed it open. None of the lights were on, and everything was silent.

Okay, maybe Gold had gone home, or something?

Sighing under my breath I flipped the light switch, allowing the living room to be illuminated in light.

There was no sign of Gold, or any signs that he had been in here.

Maybe he left straight after I did? But, didn't he ask if I was coming back? He wouldn't have asked that if he was just going to go home, would he?

I groaned, realising that I really should stop over thinking about this stupid mess, and get on with it.

So what if Gold left?! Why did I CARE?! Okay...now I was annoyed.

In rage I stomped into my bedroom, and flicked the light on. I needed some clean clothes, something comfortable that I could wallow in self pity in. But what? I started to rummage through my beside drawers, looking for an old t-shirt or something, anything that I would feel comfortable in.

"Urgh..."

I paused immediately, hearing a groan echo in the silence. Wait...did I seriously hear that? Turning to look in the direction of the noise I noticed that in fact I was wrong, so fucking wrong.

Gold hadn't left, oh no, instead he had fallen asleep...in MY BED!

My whole body tensed as I watched the golden eyed boy yawn loudly, and stretch his limbs.

"...S-Silv?" He stuttered sleepily, eyes squinting to see me in the light. I refused to say anything, and just watched him in disgust.

Okay, I was NOT in the mood for this shit.

I quickly scooped up some clothes from the bedside drawer and left my room, leaving Gold to bask in the afterglow of what just happened.

Still feeling enraged I stomped into my bathroom and hastily locked the door. I did not want any intrusions, I wanted peace and quiet. I placed my clothes on the radiator and turned the shower on. My whole body was cold, wet and shivering like I was having some sort of epileptic fit.

Stupid rain...

Slowly I took off my clothes, hating the feeling of cold and wet material clinging to my skin. It was the most disgusting thing in the world. The water was starting to warm up to a nice temperature so I stepped inside and allowed the water to wash away all the negative emotions that were building up.

I closed my eyes, enjoying the warmth of the water on my body, and the soothing sound in my ears. For once I felt calm and at ease, like nothing in the world could upset, or bother me at this moment. That was until I heard knocking on the bathroom door.

"Silv?" It was Gold, and just the sound of his voice was starting to annoy me. I ignored him, deciding to wash my hair under the spray of the water. But he was relentless and wouldn't give up.

"Silv? Are you okay?" He called out from behind the door, closely followed by a loud yawn.

How the fuck could anyone sleep through a storm? It was loud enough to wake the fucking dead!

I growled in annoyance, continuing to ignore him. But I knew he was still waiting outside the door for me, refusing to give up. That reminded me, when I get out of the shower I am kicking his ass out of my apartment for good.

When I had washed my hair, and was a lot warmer than I had been I turned off the shower and stepped out. Wrapping a towel around my waist I then pressed my ear against the door. There was nothing.

Maybe Gold had given up? Oh, who was I kidding? Gold never knows when to give up! He is relentless!

I sighed, and grabbed another towel to dry my hair with. At least now I was clean, and warm. I didn't fancy catching a cold to add to my problems.

Once I was sufficiently dry enough I put on my clean clothes, and decided to brave the outside world. Quietly I unlocked the door and pushed it open. My eyes scanned the area and noticed that Gold was in fact gone, and had not waited outside for me to finish. Thank Arceus. Releasing a breath that I didn't know I was holding I walked into the living room.

My whole body tensed when I noticed Gold sitting on my sofa, watching the news. Since when did Gold watch the news? Silently I walked closer, trying to listen to the news report.

The girl on the screen I recognised from somewhere, and she was reporting in the Kanto region. She had long dark hair and sparkling green eyes, and I was trying to figure out where I had seen her before. But right now, I couldn't.

"The Viridian City Gym Leader, Green, has sadly resigned from his post and has closed the Gym until further notice..." The reporter blabbed on, and immediately I tensed.

Shit...Gold would know about the vacancy now!

But he didn't say a word, he just watched the news report obediently.

The girl shoved a microphone under a tall man's nose, and it was then I realised that she was interviewing Green! I squinted at the screen also noticing that he looked broken...like his whole world had fallen apart.

Was that because of the vision?

"So, tell us Green, is there a reason for your recent decision to resign as Gym Leader?" She asked, waiting for his answer. Emerald eyes stared right back at me, like he was literally looking at me and no-one else.

It was creepy...

"Lately my mind has been all over the place, and I cannot commit to the Gym as much as I would like. So, the best decision was to resign, and let some-one with more commitment and passion for the job take it on." As soon as those words escaped into the air, Gold turned to face me.

"...maybe you should run for Gym Leader. I reckon you would be brilliant at it."

Without thinking I glared at the dark haired boy. How dare he say that! My ass hole Father used to own that Gym! Why the hell would I consider taking on something he used to have?!

"Are you fucking stupid?!" I cried at him, watching as his expression changed to sad within seconds. Maybe he realised what a dumb thing he had just suggested!

"Ah...sorry, I forgot." He mumbled apologetically, which only annoyed me more. Folding my arms I ignored him and continued to watch the television report.

"But, what will you do after this?" The reporter asked Green, before literally attacking his nose with the microphone. He cleared his throat a little, before continuing.

"Right now, I am unsure. But, what I do know is that I have made the right decision. I think it is time to move on, and do something new with my life. So, someone else should look after the Gym and enjoy it, just like I have."

My eyes slowly trailed down to Gold, watching him intently. He was so enthralled by the whole thing, it was sickening to see. Okay, so now he knew that the Gym Leader vacancy was open. I prayed that he wouldn't ask if I already knew about it, because obviously I couldn't say yes.

"...man...who would have guessed that Green was going to resign?" Gold mused, shocked about the whole thing.

"Maybe he had an epiphany..." I trailed off, moving to sit on the arm of the sofa. Golden eyes raised to stare at me, like he wanted to say something, but was unsure. Then he looked away, back at the television.

"But still...Green loved that Gym, it just seems...so out of character." He had a point, and that was why Blue and Red were so concerned. I just hoped he knew what he was doing.

"Thank you Green. So, there you have it. Viridian City Gym is in need of a new leader. If you think you are up to it, apply for the position. Violet reporting in front of Viridian City Gym, Kanto."

My eyes widened. That was it! That girl...she was the one who helped Cyan in my vision! Violet! And she was real!

"Hmmm..." Gold mused, looking thoughtful. I ignored him for a while, as another report came on, about a mass outbreak of Hoothoot in some forest. It wasn't like I was genuinely interested, I just needed to think.

Violet, she was real and was a real life reporter? How did I do that? How did I manage to know that?

"I think it's time you left..." I grumbled, making Gold turn to face me. He seemed shocked, like he wasn't prepared for what I said.

"Huh?"

"You heard me..."

Okay, I was being harsh, but right now I didn't want Gold here with me. I needed some time to myself, to think and sort out my head. The dark haired boy looked sad, and his eyes trailed to the floor.

"...you're still mad at me, aren't you?" Oh, and what gave it away? Was it my tone of voice, or that fact I basically told him to fuck off?

"I said, get out." I replied, trying to keep calm. Gold sighed, and reluctantly got up from his seat.

"I was...worried about you..." Golden eyes met mine for a moment, before I turned away.

Yeah right, he probably just felt guilty about what he said, and wanted to take it back to spare my feelings. Not a chance!

"Bullshit!" I cried, my tone of voice getting louder.

"I tried calling you over and over, but it kept going to voice mail...I thought that something had happened to you..." My hands clenched into fists protectively as I felt myself getting more and more worked up. I couldn't understand why this was affecting me so much, but it was.

"Oh yeah, you were SO worried you fucking fell asleep in MY BED!"

"I cried myself to sleep worrying over you!" Gold shouted back, and then a deafening silence consumed both of us. Our eyes met, and I knew he was telling the truth. His eyes looked broken, and now I looked closer I could see they were slightly red and puffy. He had been crying. It was true.

"Why would you worry over me?! You basically said we had nothing!" Before I was aware of it all the negative emotions, and the sadness started eating me up inside, until my lip started to quiver. Gold noticed and approached me slowly.

"...I didn't...want to ruin our friendship Silv. I care about you too much...I am sorry...for what I said."

"Liar...you wanted an excuse, anything to make sure I would back off." I mumbled, trying to keep it all together. Gold sighed softly, and looked away. Maybe he was trying to think of the right words to say to me so I wouldn't fly off the handle again?

"I only said those things because I thought that was why you freaked out. I just...assumed you freaked because you regretted it..."

"Oh, yeah, because I am RENOWNED for freaking out over nothing, right?!"

For some reason I felt like I was being personally attacked again, so the defences came up. Gold shook his head in response.

"That's not what I meant..."

"Just...get out Gold! I can't stand to even look at you..."

In anger I turned away, feeling the sadness wash over me like a wave. It was so hard to keep it all together.

Don't cry...please don't cry...

I closed my eyes, trying to block everything out. This whole situation was nothing more than a big horrible emotional mess that needed to be erased somehow.

"Silv...why are you so angry at me? I wasn't trying to hurt you...I was trying to help you, so you wouldn't end up regretting anything." My whole body tensed at the sound of his voice. I didn't want to hear it any more, I just wanted it all to go away.

Then the sound of my Pokegear ringing stopped the awkward conversation from continuing. I glanced down at the screen, seeing if I recognised who was calling. But I didn't. Maybe it was just some-one selling double glazing or something? To avoid any more of Gold's words I answered anyway, wondering who it could be.

"Hello?"

"Hey! This...is Silver right? Did I get the right number?"

I blinked in confusion. How on Earth did Cyan get my phone number? From Red maybe? Oh well, who knows. I sighed lightly, and but decided to see what he wanted anyway.

"Yeah...it's me. What do you want?"

"I was just checking to see if you got home okay, and if you managed to sort things out with your girlfriend." Again my body tensed. Why was Cyan convinced I had a girlfriend? Was it something I was putting out there? Oh well, probably better than him knowing the truth.

"I am fine, thanks. And no...we haven't."

Gold watched me intently, like he longed to ask me just who I was talking to, but as I stared at him I suddenly felt this wave of anger wash over me. Gold hurt me, and because he cared? If he really cared...I wanted him to prove it!

"Oh, that's a shame. Anything I can do to help?" Cyan asked. I thought about it, and yes, there was. Maybe this was a solution to my problems, a way to make Gold realise just how important I was in his life. Feeling somewhat vindictive I smirked.

"Yeah...actually, where are you now?" There was a pause.

"Me? Oh, I'm at home in Ecruteak right now."

My eyes met Gold's for a moment as I watched his expression change to sorrowful within seconds. Did he know what I was planning?

"I see, well, I wanted to...apologise for how I acted earlier. Can...I see you?"

That was a lie, I didn't ACTUALLY feel bad about it, I just wanted to make Gold jealous. I decided that if Cyan took his place as 'best friend' then Gold would do something about it, and fight for me. And this plan just had to work.

"At my house?" He asked.

"Well yeah, if that's okay?"

"I...yeah, yeah sure. Um...just let me sort things out with my Grandma."

"Thanks, so shall I see you in, say...half an hour?" Deep inside I was smiling. Gold's face was a picture. He looked so hurt by what I was saying, but I didn't care. He broke my heart, so now it was my turn.

"Sure! I'll send you a text about where I live when I know you're close by, okay?" Cyan beamed happily, and I nodded.

"Sure, that's great." I could literally hear the happiness down the phone from the dark haired boy.

"Okay then, see you soon!" He beamed in joy.

"You will, bye~" And I hung up.

Gold by this time had turned away and was now staring at some dirt mark on the carpet. His face looked pained, like he wanted to say something, but he didn't. He stayed quiet. The silence lasted for a few minutes before I walked past him, reaching towards the coat rack for my jacket.

"So...you're leaving?" Gold finally managed to say, his voice a little shaky. I nodded weakly.

"Yeah...to see a friend." I replied, pulling my jacket over my shoulder's.

"Since when do you socialise with anyone other than me, or Blue?" Gold shot back at me, but I didn't care. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Is it so hard to believe that I actually have other friend's to socialise with?" Golden eyes turned to the floor. He was already jealous. I could tell.

"I wasn't saying that, it's just...you have never spoken about them before."

"I only met him today." I answered simply, shoving my hands in my pockets. Gold's eyes widened as I told him.

"So, you meet someone and spend a few hours with them, and then you're best friends? Oh come on Silv, it just doesn't work like that." My eyes narrowed in disgust at the dark haired boy. If he was so bothered about it why didn't he try and stop me? I was giving him the chance! He could easily stop me...

"Shut up Gold. Don't tell me who I can and can not be friend's with."

"I never said you couldn't, it's just...happened so fast, and I thought you wanted us to sort this out?"

There was a difference between sorting it out, and never speaking of it again, and trying to make a go of things. Gold still seemed reluctant to actually fight for me in his life, it was like he was totally okay for me to go out and meet with some-one he didn't even know.

"Why bother? It's obvious you don't care." I replied tiredly. He shook his head.

"That is not true, and you know it! I only said those things because I care about you! I thought...that was what you wanted! I thought that...if we stopped before anything happened then nothing would turn sour, that we could still be friends."

I turned away, clenching my hands into fists in my pockets. More lies...when would he stop LYING TO ME?! He didn't have to spare my feelings! I just wanted honesty!

"You LIAR! WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU ASK ME WHAT I WANTED?!" I cried in anger, feeling sadness start to consume me once again. Gold frowned, and shifted his weight a little.

"...because, in my head I thought 'why would he even consider going for some-one like me?'..."

As soon as those broken words escaped from his lips I couldn't stop myself from lunging at him, pulling him into a hug. Gold's body was tense, but after a few minutes he relaxed. Why didn't he tell me this sooner? I closed my eyes, enjoying the embrace for a while.

"You...should have just told me." I murmured. I felt Gold's body heave, like he had just released a heavy sigh.

"Things are just not that simple Silv, I was worried that you would just turn on me, and would regret it if we got into anything serious."

I never thought that something like this would matter so much, that Gold would dwell on something like this. I was aware of the fact I was hardly the easiest person to figure out, but still, we were best friends. He should know me better.

"I would never do that..." My arms held him tightly as we embraced.

"...I never meant to upset you Silv..." He trailed off, moving slightly to look directly into my eyes. They were sparkling in sadness, golden flecks glistening like fresh dew on a leaf in spring, and it made my stomach flutter in ecstasy. Then before I knew it our faces drew closer until our lips touched, delicately. Gold's breath hitched in his throat before he relaxed, realising that I wasn't going to freak out.

His arms moved to my waist, slowly pulling me closer to him, but I let him. To be honest I liked the fact that he wasn't trying to push me away this time, coming up with all the lame ass excuses under the sun to just get me to back off. No, this time he was letting go, which was a relief.

Our lips moved against each other slowly, my tongue trailing over his mouth teasingly, hearing soft whines escape his throat every now and then. After a few seconds he gained enough courage to greet mine with his, a groan erupting from my mouth unexpectedly. My hands moved to his hair, tugging gently. I wanted him closer, I wanted more, and I could feel the kiss continue to get more and more fierce and heated as time lingered on.

Gold moaned softly into the kiss, pushing both of our bodies backwards until my back hit off the wall. It was a shock to my system, but instead of breaking the kiss it just intensified more. My fingers pulled on his dark hair, hearing short outbursts of breath from either the pain or pleasure I was causing.

The longer this went on the more aroused I was getting, and with my mind clouded with euphoria I started to lustfully nibble on Gold's bottom lip, hearing him inhale deeply.

I wanted him so bad, I knew that, but did he want me? Right now he was making no attempt to stop me, so the signs looked good. Gold's hands moved from my waist and placed themselves either side of my head, on the wall to steady himself. He was panting, trying to keep calm, and as I pulled away from the kiss and stared deeply into his eyes I knew he wanted it too.

"Silv..." He mumbled weakly, not daring to break eye contact with me. I didn't say anything and just stared into his golden eyes, that were still shimmering. My heart was hammering in my chest, and it did not show signs of slowing down. Then I watched as Gold placed a hand to my chest, bowing his head weakly.

"...we have to stop."

Snapping out of my daze I just stared at the dark haired boy in confusion. Wait...what? Stop what exactly? My body tensed as I moved my hands down to my sides immediately.

"Stop what?"

Gold sighed, moving his hand to his head. He looked just as confused as I did, but it seemed like he knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to screw with my feelings yet AGAIN!

"This...what we are doing. It's just going to end badly..."

"Oh, and you are a fucking expert on relationships now?!" I cried at him, finally letting myself get angry at him. Actually, angry was an understatement, I was livid.

How dare he do that! He lead me on, making me foolishly believe that we might actually have a chance to work things out, and then he throws it back in my face!

"I am trying to think of things in the long run Silv...you might wake up one day and regret the whole thing." Gold murmured weakly, his eyes trailing to the floor.

"Since when do you think about anything?! Usually you just fucking do it and forget about the consequences!" By this time my body had straightened, and my hands had clenched into fists, protectively. How could Gold do this?! Why did he continue to hurt me like this?!

"Silv...I care about you...I don't want this to end badly."

"Oh, and by leading me on, and then going cold on my ass is really going to make things better?!" I spat at him, and he flinched involuntarily. That was it, I didn't want to hear any more of this bullshit. In anger I held my hands up.

"You know what?! Forget it! I mean, I was fucking stupid to even think that we could work things out! If this is what you want then fine! I am wasting my time anyway."

And with that said I made my way towards the door, completely ignoring his existence. Gold didn't even make an attempt to stop me, or say anything, and before I knew it I was out of my door, and then out of my apartment block.


A gust of wind whipped past my face angrily as I stepped out into the fresh summer afternoon. I needed to get away from all this shit, to forget about Gold and how easily he continued to murder my feelings over and over again. And I also desperately needed some-one right now, some-one to talk to and to get all my emotions out into the open. Bottling them up like this wasn't helping my mental state of mind.

Maybe Cyan could actually help me?

That was it, I needed to call him again, so as I walked through the busy streets of Goldenrod City I found Cyan's number in my recent calls list and dialled. It took a few seconds before he picked up the phone;

"Hello?"

"Cyan? It's me, Silver." I mumbled, trying to stop the wind from whistling down the phone. It was the most annoying sound after all when trying to converse with someone.

"Oh, hello! Are you near my house yet?" He asked, his voice sounding just as cheery as it did before. I sighed heavily.

No, I was still in Goldenrod City, and actually I just wanted someone to talk to so I wouldn't end up breaking down. How was I supposed to word that?

"No...I've just set off from my place, I just thought that you could give me directions...from Goldenrod City." I lied, but prayed he thought nothing more of it.

"Oh yeah, sure no problem! Where are you now?" He asked, and I looked around.

I had just reached the entrance to the National Park. I knew I had to walk through here to get towards the crossroads that lead to the eerie town of Ecruteak. What a fitting town for him to live in, it was perfect for his persona. But even though it was creepy as fuck, the town itself was actually quiet and peaceful, a lot different to Goldenrod City.

"I'm by the National Park." I replied.

"When you come to the crossroads let me know, and I can direct you from there." He chirped happily, and I nodded. Actually speaking to Cyan was helping me a lot, especially with my inner demons right now. The whole issue with Gold was very draining, so keeping my mind occupied seemed like the best option.

"Thanks..." I muttered, feeling my hair thrash angrily in the wind.

"Are you okay? You sound a little upset about...something." Cyan asked, genuinely concerned over my well being. I sighed heavily, feeling better that the National Park was literally devoid of people so I could actually talk to him without feeling paranoid.

"Do you want the truth?"

"That would be a start." Cyan chuckled after his words, but it still did not lift my spirits.

"You know the reason why I was upset earlier today?" I started, deciding that maybe it was time to tell him everything. If he did genuinely care then, he wouldn't judge me. That was my main hope anyway.

"Yeah, what about it?" He questioned. As my eyes diverted to the pale blue sky I felt my stomach knot violently as the images resurfaced.

Why was it that Gold continued to hurt me? Did he enjoy it? Was that it? Some sadistic virus in his persona that made him get a kick out of watching me fall to pieces?

"...well, it just got a thousand times worse..." I heard my voice whine, and I knew I was so close to breaking down.

"Oh...I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?" Cyan asked, and I wished there was. If this was a sure way to make Gold jealous and to show that he actually gave a damn about me then hell yeah, I was totally up for that. But, there was no guarantee.

"Make me forget all this shit..." There was a pause.

"Well, I'm sure I have a bottle of wine in the fridge with your name on it, wait...you are a wine sorta person, right?"

I smiled weakly. Why was it that right now Cyan, the guy who was 'supposedly' a psychopath, hell bent on destroying me previously, was now worried about if I liked the alcohol that he had in his fridge? It was so endearing.

"Yeah, I do." I answered.

"Thank God for that," Cyan chuckled after his words. "You had me worried for a minute there." It was now I noticed that I had finally left the peaceful realms of the National Park and had reached the crossroads. I paused, and decided to wait for further instruction.

"Right, I am at the crossroads.

"Good, well take a left from there and continue straight up, as if you were going to the main town." Cyan told me, and I did as I was told.

It was weird walking back through this path. When Gold and I weren't even friends I went this way to reach Ecruteak, and I always somehow managed to bump into him all the time. It was just coincidence, but there were times when I seriously thought he was stalking me or something.

I sighed heavily, hating all this reminiscing I seemed to be doing lately, always about the past, never about the future. Cyan obviously picked up on my negativity too.

"Seriously, whatever it is that's bothering you then... you can always talk to me about it, if it will help?"

"I know, thanks. And I might take you up on that offer."

Well, if wine was involved then hell yes! It had been ages since I had drank like that with someone, I think the last time was with Blue, and she was seriously ill the morning after. She told me to shoot her if she ever touched a glass of red wine ever again. Well, I doubted I would do that, but she had my word on the wine part anyway.

"You know when I get to the town can you meet me? My sense of direction is atrocious." I mumbled, hearing Cyan laugh joyfully.

"You are a terrible liar Silver. If you just wanted to see me then you could have just asked~"

My brow furrowed in thought. That tone of voice, it was what I heard before, playful and teasing. But, it was not with malicious intent this time. And, a part of what he said was actually right, I didn't want to be on my own right now.

"Shut up Cyan." I groaned, continuing to walk towards the gloomy town.

"I'm only pulling your leg." He returned. Good job it wasn't literally.

"I'm not really in the mood for jokes, Cyan. Right now, I feel like my whole world is just burning around me."

I sighed heavily, looking around at my surroundings. Everything was so quiet for a summer's afternoon, maybe people were out at the big towns right now? I quite enjoyed the silence and the solitude however.

"Oh yeah, sorry. That was kind of insensitive, huh?"

"Can we just...talk about something else?" The last thing I wanted was pity, I just wanted to take my mind off all the shit that had been going on. If I had my way then sorting out this horrible emotional mess would be top of the agenda, but sadly that was impossible right now.

"Where are you now?" He asked, and I just noticed that I had entered the town, seeing the large doors of the Pokemon Centre right before my eyes. Well, at least I knew where I was right now.

"I am outside the Pokemon Centre in Ecruteak." Glancing around I wondered if Cyan was nearby or getting ready to jump out at me, but that was not his style. Even though that would make things better right now.

"Oh, I know! Okay, you're not far so just wait there and I'll come and meet you." I couldn't help but smile.

He didn't HAVE to meet me, I was just being a whiny pathetic girl right now, but it was nice to be put first for a change.

"Okay, I'll wait." I sat down on a nearby bench, not too far from the Pokemon Centre so Cyan could still see me from whatever direction he was coming from. There was a pause until he spoke again.

"That's great, I'll see you soon!"

And with that said he hung up, and I just sighed.

Once again the silence consumed me, and I hated it. In pure silence my mind used to torture itself with the what if's and the should have's over and over again. It was ridiculous, because over thinking never usually helped me in the long run, in fact it probably made everything worse.

My eyes stared up at the sky, and in particular at a large fluffy white cloud that hung lazily above me. It was all alone, no other clouds in sight, and in a way it made me feel a little better. For once, I was not the only one alone right now. There were other things, other people who had a worse life than I did, and I was just going through a tough time right now. With the right people I could easily come out the other side, now I just had to believe it.

As my mind started to zone out slowly I heard a faint whistle, accompanied by a yell, which made me snap out of my daze. Turning my attention to the direction of the sound I noticed it was Cyan, and he was waving at me. Without even thinking I smiled, genuinely glad to see him.

"You look like a lost Growlithe!" Cyan bellowed, before bounding over to where I was sitting. I rolled my eyes at the dark haired boy, who seemed taller than I remembered. Had he grown a little?

"Thank you so much for the needed confidence boost, greatly appreciated." I groaned sarcastically, watching as Cyan laughed.

"You should consider a career as a stand up comedian, you would be a total sellout!" He beamed, and sat beside me. In annoyance I shook my head.

"Don't be silly, Gold is the fucking comedian...even though his jokes suck ass..." I trailed off, realising that I had just thought of him, yet again, and might have unintentionally let the Meowth out of the bag. Shit... Cyan's eyes were on me like a Staraptor, watching me intently.

"Who is Gold?"

I flinched at his words, suddenly feeling my stomach knot violently, and my heart started to ache in pain. Great...now at the sheer mention of his name I turned to ash, fucking fantastic.

"...no-one." I mumbled, looking away.

"That is bullshit, and you know it." Cyan pursued, causing my whole body to tense. Would he seriously judge me? Would he laugh if he knew about that fact I was into guys?

"He...he's just..." I tried, I did, but the right words just wouldn't come out.

"He's the one who hurt you, right?" Cyan answered, and I was stunned. My eyes widened as I stared at the dark haired boy. How did he know?!

"I...how did you know?" He shrugged.

"Just a hunch, and girls aren't THAT evil from what I can gather."

Even though he now knew the reason for my heartache he was still here, supporting me, not making any snide comments or anything. That was a good thing.

"So...you're okay with that?" I asked, and Cyan just smiled.

"Did you think that I'd suddenly not talk to you if I found out?" I shrugged weakly, not really wanting to admit it.

"Well, I still don't know you that well..."

"That is true, and I guess I understand why you would be a little apprehensive, but honestly, I have no issue with that."

I was grateful in a way that he was so supportive, but it still did not make me feel any better. Deep within I still felt shit about this whole mess.

"...so, come on. Tell me the whole story." Cyan pursued, and for once in my life I did just that. I confessed everything, about how I felt about Gold, how he continued to push me away and hurt me, and how things just seemed to keep getting from bad to worse. Cyan listened the entire time, not daring to interrupt me. I had no idea why I felt like I could just talk to him, at the time it just felt right.

"So, from what I can gather is...Gold keeps going hot and cold on you, correct?" Cyan finalised, and I nodded weakly.

"Yeah...and I don't know why." The dark haired boy looked thoughtful.

"Have you tried to find out why he's being like that?"

"Of course I have, he just says he doesn't want me to get hurt, and regret anything..."

Just talking about the problem was making my heart ache once again. The mere mention of Gold's name was hurting me beyond belief. Cyan sighed softly.

"There seems to be a lot of crossed wires here, you want a relationship, and by the sounds of it he does too, but he is worried that you will freak out, and you're hurt because he's not being honest with you." I nodded, pleased that Cyan seemed to understand everything perfectly.

Deep inside I wondered if Cyan had ever gone through this too?

"He just...leads me on, and then says it's not a good idea." I admitted, feeling defeated.

"Like I said, crossed wires," Cyan continued, brushing the hair from his eyes. "I think you really need to prove it, how you feel about him, or do something that will make him realise how lucky he is to have you."

That seemed like a great idea, well, my plan was to make him jealous only he didn't seem bothered right now. He seemed more bothered about the fact I had a new friend, than I was hanging around with someone else.

"...like what? Gold is so dense, he doesn't notice anything."

"Okay, have you got any female friends?" Cyan asked, and immediately Crystal came to mind. Well, she wasn't a really good friend, I mean she was Gold's best friend...hang on, I think I understand.

"I do, well, she's closer to Gold than me..." Cyan smirked, and it was the first time I had seen him do that. A smirk with malicious intent, just like in my vision, only it wasn't aimed at me.

"That's perfect! Okay, you guys need to spend more time together." He stated, and I blinked in shock.

"What?"

"You know, go and hang out together, not include Gold in your plans, make it seem like you two are more than friends..."

Now the gears of my mind started to work. That might actually have an effect. Gold and Crystal had been best friends since they were kids, and she was the only person Gold could talk to about anything. Maybe, if I took some of that time away Gold might realise how much he cared about me!

"Right...but I don't like Crystal that way..." I groaned, and I didn't. She was okay to look at, but far too noisy and a gossip. There was no way I could even pretend to be romantically involved with some-one like that.

"All you have to do is make Gold think you do, you and Crystal would know nothing is going on, so it would all be in his head." Cyan commented, and it was true. But, Crystal would know I was acting off if I suddenly suggested a 'girly' day out, or something. We NEVER hung out.

"...she is going to know something is up, we never hang out together, usually Gold is there with us." I sighed heavily.

"Gold is being off with you, right? He has hurt you, and right now you have no-one to talk to...that can be your excuse. You call Crystal, tell her you need to see her, and act like you are at breaking point with Gold. If she is smart she won't tell Gold about why you're sad, and be there for you."

I could understand where he was coming from, and it did give me an excuse to try and make arrangements with her.

"Right..."

"Then, when you and her spend more time together, Gold is bound to get jealous about it, or think you two are an item. Then, at some point he will blow a fuse and tell you the reasons why he's mad, you do the same, and bingo! You will sort it all out."

Now things were starting to make sense. This plan could actually work, and if I wanted to see Cyan I could say I was meeting Crystal. Deep inside I smiled. Cyan was so smart, and knew exactly what buttons to press. I was thankful he was on my side right now.

"This could actually work." I muttered, and the dark haired boy smiled.

"It will work, I guarantee it."

So, that was our plan. I would call Crystal sometime soon and get the gears of this plot moving forward, and Cyan would be there too for support. It just had to work, right?

"Anyway, we can talk more at my place. My brother and Grandma are out at my parents tonight, so, we can do whatever we want." Cyan beamed, and I smiled. It was probably one of the reasons he was so pleased that I wanted to see him, but still, not having an audience was better.

"Is that why you are bribing me with wine?" I challenged, hearing him laugh.

"It's only a bribe if it works~"

Rolling my eyes I smiled and stood up. Cyan mimicked my actions, and it was a little un-nerving to see the dark haired boy be the same height as me. I was so used to people being shorter...

"Come on, I'll show you where I live." And I followed him through the gloomy town of Ecruteak, suffering from a strange case of de ja vu right now. In my vision I went to his house too, and walked the same path. I had no idea the two things would be the same, after all, I had no knowledge of his house or anything.


Cyan walked at my side, ensuring that I stayed close enough so he didn't lose me. The path was narrow, and tall skinny trees covered each sides, accompanied by long blades of grass. If some-one didn't know their way they could easily get lost here, but luckily I had Cyan, and he knew where he was going. I felt strangely at ease being with him. He had been so helpful about the whole situation with Gold, I was so thankful.

"Cyan?" The dark haired boy looked at me at the mention of his name.

"Yes?" All of a sudden I felt nervous. I had no idea why, maybe it was because we had been in silence for so long, or maybe it was because no one else was around.

"I wanted to thank you..." He smiled faintly.

"What for?" I bowed my head slightly, feeling the wind whistle past my face.

"Just being there for me, it means a lot right now." Cyan sighed, and it immediately caught my attention. Was it because I was whining about my pathetic life?

"Believe it or not I know exactly how you feel. I have been through the same thing." I blinked in shock. No way! Cyan...he had experienced this? The pain, the misery, the heart ache? How could he get over it so...easily and move on?

"Seriously?" I questioned, watching as he nodded.

"Yeah, they messed me around and lead me a merry dance, until one day I just...snapped."

That last word seemed to ring in my mind for a while as I thought about it. He must have been so upset he couldn't deal with it any more and walked away, and that takes guts.

"What happened?"

Cyan's eyes met mine, and for a split second I saw something in them, something that I had seen before. Pain, anger, the desire to cause destruction unto others, yet it wasn't aimed at me.

"Let's just say...it never happened again~"

He was very vague about it all, he didn't even tell me who it was, just that the same outcome happened, and he stopped it from continuing. Was he trying to tell me that I had to do the same?

"Oh, and I'm guessing you have never tried to be someone else since then?" He shook his head, and then smiled.

"I never found the right person for me."

"I can't understand why, you're a nice enough person."

Then he laughed, and it wasn't one of those laughs where the person is in denial, it was a chilling laugh, something I couldn't describe.

"I have never been 'nice', Silver."

"You're nice to me, surely that counts." I replied, and it was the truth. He didn't have to listen to my woes, he could easily tell me to piss off or something. He had a choice. Cyan looked back at me, and smiled. There was a sadness etched into his smile for some reason, was I causing it?

"I just...don't want you to end up like me. You have time to make things right."

"What are you talking about?" The dark haired boy sighed heavily, and I could tell this whole conversation wasn't something he liked talking about.

"If you want to keep being messed around by some-one like that then, you deserve everything that is coming to you. You still have the chance to get out, and make something of your life...with someone who really appreciates you."

For an odd reason I felt my cheeks burn at his words, and I had no idea why. All my life I had never felt appreciated, just a burden. To feel appreciated, would that be weird? Even my own Dad didn't appreciate me, well...if abuse is appreciating then I'd rather go without...

"Like I would ever find some-one like that..." I mused aloud.

Cyan's azure eyes met mine for a moment and it was like time had miraculously stopped for that second. Everything was silent, nothing seemed to be moving, the only sound I could hear was my heart beating faster inside my chest. It was echoing in my ears, and I swear to Arceus he could hear it.

Quickly I looked away, suddenly feeling awkward about the situation. Cyan didn't even say anything, but he didn't have to. Just the look in his eyes said everything to me that I needed to know.

Maybe the answer is staring at you, right now, you just don't see it yet.


Author's Note: Gah! Hope you liked! Please read and review, it's CHRISTMAS! And have a Happy New Year everyone! xx