ADULTHOOD PART 1

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Deciding what I will do with my future was never easy. I originally wanted to take criminology but my father was against it. He suggested that if I wanted to fight criminals and promote justice, and because I was a female, I should take law course instead of criminology, which was more hazardous. My mother agreed with father and left with no choice and words to go against them, and taking in to consideration they were just worried, I followed father's advice and took up law course.

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While I was venturing most of my days in school and libraries, studying all these thick law books and manuals, Hanji was fairing in pre-med school focusing on Kinesiology and Gross Anatomy. I didn't know since when she had taken such interest on cadavers and dissection but since it was her, she almost feared nothing. However, whenever we meet up, she sometimes went overboard and spoke of… well, gross topics even when we were having a meal. So, most of the times I wasn't able to finish my food.

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An update to our high school classmates, I remembered that both Erwin and Auruo were taking up criminology together. Though Hanji discovered that Erwin was taking special classes on something about being a detective. Rico was talking law course too, just like me, but she went to a different college.

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Everyone was taking the path that they have chosen. As for me, I was still waiting for the time that I will come to love the path that I took. I was feeling envious towards Erwin and Auruo, who took the course that I've wanted, and towards to Hanji, who was enjoying her everyday life.

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"I'm home," I greeted as I was changing my shoes to slippers. I noticed that there were few unfamiliar shoes. "Mom? Do we have guests?"

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I heard footsteps coming down from the second level of our house. To my surprise, it was Armin.

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"Armin!" I greeted with excitement. It has been a while.

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"Petra-san!" Armin greeted back. He was still the same, except for his height though. His fluffy blonde hair was still at nape length, and his big blue eyes were still bright and full of optimism. "Ah, welcome home!"

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"Thank you," I fondly replied and patted his head like he was still a kid. He was still in his last year of middle school though. "I bet Mikasa and Eren are with you?" the three of them have been inseparable, they were really cute.

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"Ah yes, we're at the loft upstairs," Armin said. "Aunty just went to the grocery and said she'll be back before six."

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"Shopping for dinner I guess," I replied and chuckled. "Will you be staying for dinner?"

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"Ah…" Armin blushed. He's just a sweet kid. "Yes, if you don't mind."

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"No, no, not at all! Either way, since Mom is always fond of you three she would never let you go without taking dinner," I told him and we both laughed.

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We went to the loft upstairs while Armin helped me carry my thick law books. There, I saw Eren looking at some pictures and Mikasa browsing through my high school yearbook.

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"Eren, Mikasa," Armin called and Eren's and Mikasa's attention went to Armin. "Petra-san is here."

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Mikasa, with her polite attitude and calm composure, quickly stood up and bowed as a greeting. Eren greeted me with a smile and said, "Petra-san, it has been a while."

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"Oh! Eren, you've grown quite tall!" time sure flew fast. Not long ago Eren was this little, stubborn boy who would always protect little Armin along with cute Mikasa. His shoulders became broader and he sure became manly looking. I chuckled with amusement.

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"And Mikasa, you've grown really pretty," I have noticed Mikasa's hair was shorter but nonetheless she still looked attractive. "I bet you already have a boyfriend?"

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Mikasa suddenly blushed. She easily blushes to topics that she wasn't really used to. How cute of her.

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"If she would just stop clinging so much to me, maybe Jean would have already gotten hold of her for a long time," Eren said with a hint of play in his voice. And then Mikasa covered her face with the scarf Eren gave her.

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"Jean still likes Mikasa? Well, we're talking about Jean here," I let out a laugh. "Ah, have you had anything for snacks yet?" I asked as I drop my things on the sofa.

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"Ah… not yet…" Armin shyly answered.

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"Don't be shy now," I told them so they could relax a bit. "Mikasa, will you help me?"

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Mikasa silently nodded and we both went downstairs to prepare some snacks.

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Seeing these three kids again sure brought a lot of memories and the feeling of nostalgia just kept floating. I somehow missed being a student, thought I was still a student – in college – I missed being the younger me. I envied these three that they were able to enjoy their everyday moments in school, unlike me, whose world seemed to have revolved around Levi. But nonetheless, I didn't feel regret. Even thought it wasn't much, I was still happy that Levi and I made a progress.

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"Petra-san," Mikasa suddenly called as she was slicing some tomatoes.

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"Yes?" I responded while frying some homemade burger patties.

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"How does it feel like to be an adult?" Mikasa's question caught me to a surprise.

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"Adult… you say," I mumbled and fell into a deep thought.

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To be truthful, I'd never considered myself yet as an adult. I didn't even think I acted as one, too. It felt like I haven't changed at all since high school days. Maybe if there was one thing that could be considered as a change in me, that would probably my courage and optimism. Unlike during my childhood, I wasn't crying too much now and I could finally answer people straight with less timidity.

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"Well, it didn't feel like I'm an adult," I just answered Mikasa. I turned the range off and carefully transferred the patties on the plates. "Since I'm still attending college and studying. What made you ask that, Mikasa?"

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"Well," Mikasa mumbled. "Because you've experienced lots of things, and even fell in love."

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I dropped my spatula.

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"Ah, Petra-san," Mikasa bent down to get my spatula. "You dropped-"

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"Who?!" I shrugged Mikasa, my face was hot. Her expression changed from plain to surprises. "Who told you that? Is it Hanji? It's Hanji right?! Aaaaaah~! Hanji…" I ruffled my hair and fell on my knees. I was utterly embarrassed. I suspected Hanji to have told Mikasa about it, there was no other person who knew I like Levi.

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"Pe-Petra-san…?"

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I hugged my knees and buried my face. I couldn't possibly look at Mikasa right now – not now that my face. My heart was pumping really hard and my body was slightly trembling. I didn't want any person to know that I like Levi, even my parents. I couldn't stand up or move. I was terribly embarrassed.

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I thought I was far from adulthood, getting shy in front of my junior.

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I had still a long way to go.

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