Title: Figment of Reality
Author: Ryuk-chan
Rating: T (currently)
Chapter: 7

Disclaimer: Kishimoto-san says I can have Naruto for one second... okay, time's up.

Warnings: Future SasuNaru, some profanity, OOCness, weird prankage, slight awkwardness, etc.


Chapter 7: The Power of Applesauce


That bastard got me. At my own fucking game.

I didn't plan on ignoring this. Oh no. Payback was mandatory.

….But how to do it?

My eyebrows furrowed. This was going to take some serious strategizing.

"What's with the constipated look?" Kiba asked me as he sat down at the table.

"I gotta figure out a way to get Sasuke back!" I said, determined, pounding my fist on the table. "I can't let a noob beat me at my own game!"

"Ah, so the war rages on!" he smiled, "I knew you had it in ya!"

I nodded. Kiba was my right-hand man and my partner-in-crime. If anyone could help me get that phantom back, it was him.

"Okay, so what's the game plan?" I leaned in eagerly. Kiba laughed around his milk carton.

"I have no idea, dude. This one is all on you."

I pouted.

"Fine, whatever." The boy thought for a moment then shrugged his shoulders, "I dunno, dump some food on his head or something."

I smirked, glancing down at my cup of applesauce, plot forming in my head. "Great idea, Kiba," I snickered, eyeing Sasuke from across the cafeteria. "I think I'll welcome him properly."

The Uchiha came over to the table, glancing at me warily. I quietly wondered if he already knew what I was planning. He sat beside me, stirring his applesauce with a plastic fork.

Kiba looked at me expectantly. If I was going to do it…now would be the perfect time.

I inhaled, and fingered the cup sitting on my tray. Did I really want to do this? It would be best not to piss off the person you're entrusting your life with….

Oh, to hell with it.

I swiftly picked up the applesauce cup and flung it over Sasuke's head, moving faster than I thought possible. The next thing I registered was the fruit snack dripping down Sasuke's black hair, and a smirk upon his face.

At first, I wanted to laugh. But then I felt something cold and slimy slip down my scalp.

Applesauce?

"You bastard!" I called out. "How did you—" The rest of the students in the cafeteria looked over at my outburst, pointing and cackling about the food on our heads.

"Hey, you did it to me first!" Sasuke argued, attempting to wipe some of the gunk out his pristine hair.

"You deserved it, though!"

"Boys!" another voice shouted at us, clearly angry. It was Kurenai, the vice principal, glaring at us. "Go clean yourselves up and report to my office. Now." Her tone was teeming with finality.

We nodded, embarrassed, and silently trekked out of the dining hall with our applesauce-topped heads and our classmates' eyes following us.

-------

"Thanks a lot, bastard," I mumbled when we entered the bathroom. I sifted through my yellow hair, feeling the glop entangled within. He looked at me in the mirror, with a smile upon his face.

"What the hell is so funny?" I asked, absentmindedly noting that this was the first genuine smile I've seen on his face. I liked it.

"You look really stupid," he replied amusedly.

"Well so do you!" I snorted. "And at least you deserved your applesauce. Mine was completely uncalled-for!"

He nodded sarcastically. "Right, the fact that it was your idea in the first place puts you completely above blame."

"Damn straight!" I answered, wetting a few paper towels.

He did the same wordlessly. I sighed.

"How did you know I was going to do it?" I asked, pausing in my cleaning.

"I don't know," he confessed. "It's weird… I always get this… strange feeling before you do something you shouldn't. I can't explain it."

I wondered, "You mean like that whole bus crash thing?"

He shook his head. "Exactly."

"Interesting," I whispered, trashing the last of my brown paper towels. Sasuke had already finished straightening himself up. His hair was back to that perfect hairstyle… or whatever he wants to call it. "You ready for Kurenai's lecturing?" I asked.

"Yes, but first," he began, grabbing my arm before I pushed through the door, "You still have some applesauce…right here." He took his other hand and brushed it across my forehead, removing the food and leaving a tingling sensation behind. I felt my face heat up. I instinctively closed my eyes.

"Got it," he declared in a monotone, and sauntered out the bathroom door ahead of me.

--------

I bet he did that on purpose. He knew he made my stomach churn in all these weird ways… and he was doing it to get on my nerves.

That had to be it.

We cautiously approached Kurenai's office, prepared for the stern berating. She was usually a kind woman, but when you act up, she's strict. She invited us to have a seat as soon as we entered, her hands folding together atop her desk. I grinned.

"Okay, let me start by saying how great you look today, Ms. Yuhi. You get more and more lovely with each passing day," I complimented. She brushed the sycophancy off.

"I appreciate the flattery," she said with a smile, "but you can drop the act, Naruto. I want an explanation from the both of you."

"You can ask him, he started it," I stated childishly. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Che, whatever. You were the one that started it. You got me first."

"Nuh-uh, you were first."

"Well from where I was standing," Kurenai said, successfully interrupting our petty argument, "you both did it at the same time. Now I don't know what warranted such an exploit but this had better be the last time."

I opened my mouth to retort, but she cut me off.

"Now Sasuke, I understand that you're a new student, but that just isn't the way we operate here. And Naruto," she chided, turning to me with a fierce glare, "you ought to know better. This is not the first time something like this has occurred with you." I smirked inwardly. No one could forget the massive food fight Kiba and I started our sophomore year. I honestly think they're still cleaning up from it.

I gave her a nod. "So you called us down here to tell us to be good?" I asked. This whole 'meet me in my office thing' was beginning to seem like a waste of time. She shook her head and glanced between both of our faces.

"I just wanted to take care of this before it becomes a serious issue. I've been forewarned to watch after your behaviors and it seems the two of you haven't gotten off to a very good start."

"Forewarned? By who?" Sasuke and I asked simultaneously.

"Hatake-san," Kurenai replied, startled by the unison. "And it seems he was right to worry about you two getting along."

We both grumbled to ourselves. Of course it was Kakashi-sensei.

"I assure you, Ms. Yuhi," Sasuke promised, "it won't happen again. I apologize for the trouble we caused." He stood up from his seat and gestured for me to follow him. "As much as we'd like to stay and chat, we have a class to attend."

We excused ourselves from the office and slid into the hallway. I elbowed Sasuke playfully. "You certainly have a way with words, Mister Silent."

He smirked. "It's a skill."

"I believe it," I replied. The bored faces of our classmates met us as we entered the room.

"Welcome back," Shikamaru greeted us tiredly, seated in the desk neighboring our own. I waved in salutation, and Sasuke gave a nod. This was math, so I don't blame the lazy guy for being sleepy.

Another person that acknowledged our arrival was Neji, seated in the corner, eyeing us from afar. Honestly… it was weird. Usually the guy keeps to himself; I personally didn't know him, and we never recognized each other's presence. Yet today, when I looked over at him, he waved.

Just when I thought today couldn't get any stranger.

Math class went on, blah blah blah. Nothing really interesting happened. I did, however, notice that both Sasuke and Neji were geniuses when it came to Trigonometry. The speed at which they finished problems was kind of frightening and awesome at the same time.

Last period rolled around, student impatience rose with every passing second. Sasuke and I were berated with questions about the lunch incident, and many of them I had no answer for. Kiba was enjoying the popularity by association, while Sasuke was avoiding it. But even though he shrank away, our female classmates wouldn't leave his side for a second.

"Who does he think he is, doing that to poor Sasuke?" one blonde girl whispered to her friend, voice laced with malice. It was obvious she was talking about me…every chick at the school wanted my head on a stick. Especially since I 'insulted their precious Sasuke.' I groaned at my rotten luck.

"She makes a point though, Naruto," Ino nudged me. "Why on earth would you want to mess up that!?" she squealed, ogling Sasuke's form. I groaned even louder.

I slapped my head on my tan forehead. "You are not helping, Ino. Why do I even bother talking to you?"

"Because you still feel weird talking to Sakura," she teased. "And you know she blabs waaay more than I do."

I shrugged. Can't argue with the facts. Ino is a horrible gossip, but Sakura is far worse.

"I would love to be saved by him," Ino sighed dreamily. "You are so lucky, Naruto."

I swear I saw hearts forming in her eyes. The poor girl was long gone off the deep end.

"Lucky, burdened, cursed, what's the difference?" I shrugged. "All he does is stalk me, making snide remarks and confusing the hell out of me." Something told me she wasn't even listening anymore. "But, despite all that, I bet you'd love having him follow you around."

She smiled goofily, maybe at the statement…. But then again, maybe not.

"He is pretty hot, I'll give you that. All mysterious and otherworldly," I continued, "And those eyes…you could lose yourself in them. Plus that insanely soft skin…and those lips..."

I paused, surprised that the comment came out of my mouth. I fought against the blush attempting to form on my cheeks, and glanced at blond fangirl to see if she heard me.

That weird smile thing was still on her face, and I sighed in relief. Good thing she's practically deaf like this. Or else I'd never hear the end of it.

I allowed myself a glance at Sasuke, in case he heard me with those phantom senses of his. His dark eyes were directed down at a book, black bangs cascading around his pallid face, completely unfazed. I smiled softly.

Okay, so maybe I am a little lucky.


Hi. Applesauce is yummy.

I had a hard time writing this chapter. It still seems weird... but that was the best I could do. Sorry. At least a little interaction happened....!

Ugh, I'm tired. I got late Calc homework and an art assignment to finish. But I really wanted to get this chapter together for you guys.

Thanks for all the reviews I got the last chapter... they're greatly appreciated! I wish I could say more, but I'm so exhausted. But I want you to know that I'm eternally greatful!

Please review! Let me know if this chapter is as sucky as I think it is.

And I promise you'll like the next one!

Oh and also! Check out the poll on the top of my profile! It'll let me know what to do with the rating... whether to leave it T or step it up a notch.

~ Ryuk-chan