Spinning my mind

Hermione's eyes opened as she felt his presence draw away from her. Looking up, her eyes connected with his, the stormy grey intensity seeming to swallow her whole. That had been her first kiss. Her first proper kiss. It wasn't at all like people had said it would be. Lavender had told her on numerous occasions how her first had been wet and rather disgusting. Secretly Hermione thought that might have had something to do with her choice of partner. But this kiss…it was everything she'd expected and more, not that she'd been expecting it of course...Malfoy...

She'd kissed...Malfoy? Hermione's mind seemed to zoom out of his intoxicating eyes to see the full picture. And it wasn't pretty.

Oh Merlin…

Malfoy seemed to clock the change in her expression, and his eyes immediately hardened, his hand, which she had not noticed before, dropping swiftly from her neck. They seemed to come to the realisation of what they had just done at the same point, their eyes widening in synchronisation. Hermione spoke the first words which bubbled to her lips.

"I-I'm sorry," she began quickly, her breath coming rapidly, they were still extremely close to one another, but his presence which moments before had been strangely blissful suddenly seemed menacing. She knew how angry he must be that someone like her had touched him, and yet…it had felt like he'd responded…

What had she been thinking? She didn't even like the boy before her, and yet she could hardly deny the reaction her body had to his proximity, her entire being was energised by his mere presence, whilst just days before she'd rejected her best friend, the person she trusted most in the world, when he'd tried to kiss her. It was madness, but Hermione's sharp mind was insisting to her rapidly beating heart that her attraction to the boy was merely physical, after all, who was she kidding? He was gorgeous – everyone knew it, but she knew better than most that his personality was a rather large drawback.

Embarrassed, but determined not to show this boy any more weakness, Hermione inhaled deeply pulling up to her fullest height and repeated her apology with dignity, her chin held high. At least she was acknowledging that she'd made a mistake, after her apology there could be no confusion about what had just happened, obviously it had been a complete accident...their lips had just...somehow...gah.

Malfoy watched her with an increasingly intimidating gaze. He couldn't understand why she was apologising. His thoughts replayed the moment before with mounting anger. Who had initiated the kiss? He wanted desperately to believe that it had been Granger throwing herself at him in a moment of blinded lust but, despite his reputation, Draco had a strong sense of internal justice, and he knew that he was also to blame.

What could possibly have possessed him to kiss this disgusting excuse for a witch? Sure, he'd readily admit that he'd been paying more attention to her lately, but how could he not when she was hanging around his common room constantly and spending time with his best friend? And sure, he might have been a little...overprotective of his friend...but how could he possibly justify kissing her as an answer to the problem? And how could it have felt so right to kiss a mudblood when everything he knew told him they were beneath him?

Of course, he knew that Granger was intelligent, it would be foolish to suggest otherwise, and yet he maintained his hatred for her and everyone else related to Potter because that was what was right…

Regret flooded through him, what the fuck had he been thinking? And what about her! He was sure she'd returned his kiss…hadn't she? She was supposed to be intelligent! How could she let something like this happen...

Oh Shit, he thought, seeing her face before him, was she going to go around telling people he'd assaulted her? He sort of already had of course, he thought sheepishly remembering the incident in the dungeons, but that wasn't his fault, he'd just felt so…so angry. Angry that she was spending time with his best friend. Angry that she liked him. He felt a similar anger brewing within him now as her stubborn gaze met his.

He regretted what he'd done, and was disgusting to have shared something so intimate with the mudblood, but somehow the worst thing in his mind was that she seemed so offended by the act. He'd never been with a girl who hadn't come away from him begging for more, trust Granger to be different...had she thought he was a bad kisser? Draco shook himself internally, berating himself for worrying about such stupid things when a much more important issue was at stake.

He'd kissed a fucking mudblood...what would his father think? His father would never know, of course, but the older Malfoy's voice had become something of a guiding force in Draco's mind, which had become quite adept at imagining what he would say under such circumstances. Of course he'd be disowned from the family. All because of a fucking mudblood.

His breath came more rapidly as the hatred surged within him, his angry gaze still connected to hers, his brow furrowed. It was just hate, he told himself, hate was a passionate emotion, and Merlin knew he hated Potter and all his cronies with a passion, the kiss was just...an unusual expression of those emotions. But what was going to happen between them now? What if she thought that the kiss was more than just his hatred bursting through? Surely she wouldn't delude herself into thinking he actually cared for her...

Even if it was just a manifestation of his hatred for the mudblood, he couldn't deny that the kiss had been explosive...she knew he hated her, and he knew she hated him and the damage had already been done...so what was wrong with a...couple more friendly kisses? Shaking himself again he reminded himself that meaningful or not, it was a sin to kiss a mudbood.

Hermione was scared by his expression, fearing a repeat of what had happened in the dungeons; she wouldn't put it past the bastard to start blaming her for everything that had happened...although...she couldn't really tell who had initiated the kiss...

Confusion coiled within her, had she kissed him? Or had it been the other way round... she had thought herself able to resist the petty desires of her female housemates, yet she couldn't deny that whoever had started the kiss, she hadn't pulled away from this man who hated her, and who she hated in return.

Hermione forced herself to remember that everything about her disgusted him, and whilst she didn't used to care, the thought now left a slight twist in her chest.

The silence, which could have lasted forever as mental battles raged within the two prefects, was broken by the noise of students leaving the Great Hall still some way off, but it was enough to snap both students out of their reverie. They could not be caught here. Alone.

Draco seemed to make his mind up in that split second and, moving with lightening speed, gripped her shoulder forcefully but not hard enough to hurt her and pointed his finger in her face menacingly.

"Not a word," he said shaking his head slightly, his breath becoming shallow and quick as his eyes darted around the corridor. She could tell he was nervous, but his voice had sounded almost...pleading. For a moment she couldn't reply, but then she nodded fervently.

"Go." He said then, releasing his hold on her jumper. She slipped away without hesitation, heading for the staircases which would take her to her next class. Draco pressed his forehead against the wall she'd just occupied and banged his fist gently on the cold stone as the first students from the Great Hall began to pass him. He could only hope she'd have the sense to keep quiet.

The students passed by without paying attention to him, he seemed to melt into the dark alcove despite his vibrant hair colour, which seemed rather symbolic to Draco. Once the last of the straggling first years had dissipated, Draco twisted round, leaning his back against the wall and sighed again. Looking around cautiously, he lifted his arm and pulled back the sleeve of his jumper revealing the dark lines etched into his skin. This is what you believe, he heard his father's voice say in his head as he closed his eyes.

Taking a deep breath, he pushed away from the wall and headed towards his next class.


Ron waited nervously in defence against the dark arts, he had some things to clear up with Hermione and he was hoping desperately that it would all turn out for the best. When he and Lavender had entered lunch, she still sulking, he feeling rather sorry for himself, a certain Professor had swept past them, a certain Professor who was supposed to be in his office waiting for Hermione, a certain Professor that Malfoy was supposed to be taking her to see. Ron had frozen as he watched his least favourite teacher seat himself at the high table. If Snape was here, what was Malfoy doing with Hermione?

But before he could even ponder the possibility of heroically going to rescue her, Lavender had grabbed his arm and hauled him down into the seat next to her, where he promptly became so distracted by lunch that he forgot all about Hermione.

Until now. She walked into the classroom only seconds before the lesson was due to start and took her place beside Harry. Ron peered around his black-haired friend to get a good look at her. She didn't look like she'd been brutally attacked by the Slytherin Prince as Ron had feared...in fact she looked entirely normal...but he had to know what had happened.

Pulling out his quill, Ron carefully tore off a piece of parchment and scratched a hasty message onto it which he slid across the tabletop in front of Harry to Hermione.

She picked the note up without moving her eyes from the text she was copying from the blackboard, and unfolded it carefully, smoothing it on the desk before darting her eyes down to read it.

What did Snape want to talk to you about? Stupid git x

Hermione's face remained neutral as she read the note and, scribbling a hurried reply, levitated the note back to Ron who opened it hastily not bothering to check if the Professor was looking.

The potions assignment Ronald, what else? Now I suggest you concentrate and stop distracting Harry with your notes. You both need to pay attention -I won't be in the common room tonight to help you do your homework.

Ron's heart gave a painful squeeze. First she sat with a Slytherin and abandoned him in potions, and now she was lying to him...this girl who just days before had seemed to be head over heels in love with him...Usually Ron would have chuckled at the ever-baffling intricacies of women, but Hermione wasn't a woman. She was the girl who'd been his best friend since first year. The girl he trusted above anyone else; and now she was lying to him. It hurt him more than he cared to admit, even to himself. What had he done to deserve this from her? And more importantly...why did she feel the need to lie about it? What could possibly have happened that she wouldn't tell him about?

He couldn't decide whether to call her out on her lie. On the one hand, he was itching to know what the slimy git Malfoy had said to her, on the other hand, their relationship had already become so awkward over the past few days that he feared losing her forever if anything else happened which might tear them apart. Even Harry seemed to be drifting away from him these days, spending more time talking to Lavender and Ginny than him. Was this the result of his new attitude? Maybe Harry was jealous that he was no longer the only one in the limelight...


At the end of the day, Hermione went to find Blaise so they could continue working on their project. It was a Friday so they would be working in the library doing research. Despite the fact that Hermione was becoming increasingly comfortable in the Slytherin common room, she was glad she wouldn't have to face their dungeon dwellings today; another encounter with Malfoy was not particularly high on her list of things to do. In fact, it had been a miracle that she'd somehow managed to avoid him entirely at dinner.

Attempting to leave the Great Hall before Malfoy inevitably entered to take his meal, Hermione approached the Slytherin table to collect Blaise. Upon her arrival, he rose immediately from his seat causing a few of those Slytherins who had become more accustomed to Hermione's presence to raise their eyebrows, smirking. In an unusual display of emotion, Blaise sent a slight scowl in their direction before following Hermione out of the Great Hall.

The two walked in amicable silence towards the moving staircase. Blaise was quiet as usual, but this time Hermione didn't feel the need to fill the empty air with her monologues, she realised that she had become as comfortable around the tall boy as she used to be around Ron, and when he walked past the staircase in the direction of the dungeons instead of mounting the stairs for the library, she didn't hesitate to reach out and grab is arm.

He froze at the contact, his entire body stiffening in a moment.

Hermione blanched at his reaction but nevertheless reminded him in a steady tone that they were working in the library today, wondering whether she'd been too forward with this boy she'd only known for a few days. He nodded in acquiescence and walked past her up the stairs, slipping his arm from her grasp as he went. Hermione felt a sudden knot in her stomach. Had Draco told him about their kiss? Was that why he had seemed to shy away from her? She followed him nervously up the stairs, expecting him to whirl round and confront her at any moment, despite knowing that confrontation was not in his nature.

It appeared she had been worrying in vain, however, when, upon entering the library, Blaise returned to his studious yet friendly self. The two rapidly got lost in their work, Hermione delving herself into the crinkled pages of her favourite Potions anthology, quietly savouring the smell of old books which always lingered in the library and often clung to her very clothing after a long stint of studying. She worked happily for a while before Blaise pulled her out of her study-trance with his soft voice.

"Is something wrong?" he asked. Hermione looked up in surprise.

"No..." she replied immediately, but Blaise didn't look convinced.

"Something's different." He said, his eyes connecting with hers with an intensity that surprised her, "You're different. You seem...distracted." Hermione looked at him in confusion. She wasn't used to this. She wasn't used to someone seeing through her like this. She had been relying on the short-sightedness of the male species that she had experienced in Harry and Ron, and yet here was Blaise, a Slytherin no less, understanding her better than she did. Perhaps she had been a little distracted...despite working for so long, she hadn't made nearly as much progress as she usually would have...

She looked into Blaise's eyes for a moment, wondering whether she should tell him what had happened with Draco, he was the middle ground between them after all, the only person they could both consider a friend...maybe he could explain their erratic behaviour? But she realised a moment later that she couldn't tell that secret. Not to him, not to anyone, and she broke his gaze, returning to her work.

She heard a small sigh beside her as he, too, began flicking through the pages of the books before him once more. She couldn't help but wonder if, by rejecting this offer of friendship from him, she had undone all the good that had occurred between them.

The two worked late into the night, mostly in silence, only quitting their studies when Madam Pince, the haughty librarian, felt the need to inform them that should they stay any longer, she would call the headmaster to deal with them. The two rolled their eyes at the librarian's behaviour and began packing up their books.

Hermione was about to leave the archives when Blaise's soft voice called her back.

"It's still half an hour 'till curfew," he stated from the table, "would you like to come back to the common room with me?" Hermione's heart gave a little leap at the offer, as a girl who had never been particularly popular, it was always exciting for her to be invited places with new friends, and by a Slytherin no less! But it didn't take her head long to remember that the Slytherin common rooms were not a place she wanted to be at the moment, lest she should run into their Prince.

"I...I'm sorry Blaise," she said, guilt and dismay welling up inside her, "I have to patrol tonight." It was a completely legitimate excuse, as prefect she was expected to patrol when it was her turn and could take on extra shifts if she wanted to, but tonight wasn't her turn and Blaise, unfortunately, knew that. Blaise said nothing as Hermione waited in the doorway. She didn't want to face him but she found that she couldn't move, her mind still waiting for him to reply. After a few moments of silence, Hermione turned around and immediately jumped at Blaise's proximity.

With a stealth that frightened her, he had managed to move to within a metre or so of her body and was now gazing at her with his unreadable eyes.

"You don't have to patrol tonight." He said simply, blinking once, but otherwise giving away no emotion. Hermione coloured immediately as the tall boy called her out on her lie, her embarrassment rising within her. As her mind attempted to formulate a reply, the quiet boy before her spoke again.

"But we can patrol together, if you'd like." Hermione raised her eyes in surprise but Blaise wasn't looking at her, for once his direct gaze was focussed downwards. Hermione's brow furrowed slightly as she looked at him, her heart swelling. She couldn't understand why he still wanted to spend time with her knowing that she'd lied to him...did he know the reason behind her reluctance to go to the Slytherin common rooms? Did he understand?

"Ok." She said, somewhat faintly as Blaise raised his head slowly. Their eyes connected and he offered a rare smile before walking past her into the dark corridor. She followed him in a daze, her heart leaping at the joy of having found a friend.


The two prefects walked together through the many corridors of the school, chatting quietly as they passed the dark alcoves and empty classrooms, Hermione was surprised at how talkative her companion was being and felt she'd somehow earned the right to see this side of his personality, and when she saw him laugh for the first time, she felt a genuine rush of warmth spread from her heart throughout her whole body. Looking at him that night, she felt as though they'd been destined to become friends.

Unnoticed by either, a silent figure watched them from the shadows, scowling and squinting through the darkness. Interesting, he thought shrinking back into the gloom as the two turned a corner.

Skulking was in his nature, but Snape couldn't stop the small, twisted smile which graced his features as he watched his two favourite students getting along so well together. He couldn't help but think back to his own days at Hogwarts, he a shy, quiet Slytherin, she...she a beautiful, proud Gryffindor...

With a sorrowful sigh, Hermione's greasy guardian angel shuffled away through the dark corridors, his mind trapped as usual in the perpetual torments of his past.

A/N Hey So I left the author's note to the end this time because I wanted last chapter and this chapter to flow together – the following note is quite long but it does explain some of the reasoning behind what's happening so it may be quite interesting to read I found this chapter quite difficult to finish, so I hope it turned out ok, sorry if it drooped towards the end...

A note on Draco and Hermione. For starters, they do most definitely hate each other. However, the way I see it, their hatred is the sort that comes from being told repeatedly that you hate something without actually experiencing it yourself. From where I stand, the two couldn't possibly get together EVER if they had a real hatred which came from experiencing each other's personalities and disliking them. So my hypothesis is thus: their hatred comes from being taught by others that they must hate each other, and yet through their hatred they begin to experience one another's true personality, seeing the stubbornness and fieriness they share, and they begin to experience actual emotions (not just artificial hatred) for each other, and as this is the case, their poor brains which have, in essence, been washed (as in brainwashed) by society, struggle to find a way to express the emotions they have for each other (not necessarily romantic ones), starting with fighting, but leading to more. In my mind, their true emotions lie in their subconscious veiled by their artificial hatred, but the subconscious can kick in at any moment, stemming from something tiny like an awkward silence, or a moment of stillness. Hence, they kissed. But don't worry, it won't be that easy :P In Dramione fics, it never is.

I know this has already been a massive author's note so I won't list everyone, but thanks to EVERYONE who reviewed – you all make me laugh so much! Hopefully this chapter/extensive author's note has answered some of your queries. Thank you all, the number of reviews has blown me away! 3