Chapter 7: Balance

"I foresee a complication. The design of this ship is far more advanced than I have anticipated", Spock stated when he and Jim Kirk entered the ship containing the red matter.

"Voice print and face recognition analysis enabled. Welcome back, Ambassador Spock", the Computer's female voice suddenly sounded.

"Huh, that's weird", Kirk said quickly and went on hoping Spock wouldn't dig deeper.

The Vulcan stood still. "Computer, what is your manufacturing origin?" he asked and a notion started to unfold in his mind.

„Stardate 2387. Commissioned by the Vulcan Science Academy."

And suddenly everything made sense. The jigsaw was complete. There was – or had been – another Spock out there. An older Spock. From the future, like Nero. And this was his ship. His future self must had followed the Narada through time. Now the Commander had a pretty good guess that the presence of his older self – Ambassador Spock as the computer said – was the reason for his vision. Quantum physics was a largely unexplored sector of science. No one knew for sure what would be happening if someone traveled trough time. Until now. He had caught glimpses of the others Spock's life, his life when he had been his age. The former shape of events and their new one somehow collided in certain related moments and Spock was able to sense those collisions in the form of visions. Although, he wasn't certain if it was because of the alternative reality that must had been created or merely by the time travel itself. Suddenly Kirk's appearance on the Enterprise fitted, too.

Spock went to Kirk who was in the vessel's cockpit. "It appears you have been keeping important information from me."

"You'll be able to fly this thing, right?" the Captain asked instead of answering his question.

"Something tells me I already have", Spock replied dryly.

"Good luck", Kirk said and walked away.

"Jim!" Spock called, suddenly realizing something.

Kirk stopped and turned around.

"The statistical likelyhood that our plan succeeds is less than 4.3 percent…"

"It'll work", Kirk simply said.

"In the event that I do not return, please tell Lieutenant Uhura –"

"Spock", Kirk cut in, "It'll work."

Spock sat down in the pilot's chair while Kirk went on to find Christopher Pike.


Barely an hour later everything was over. Nero was defeated, Pike was saved. As Spock, Kirk and Pike had materialized in the Enterprise McCoy and Uhura came running into the transporter room.

Nyota fell into Spock's arms. "You're back!" She almost started crying.

"Shhh, it's alright. It's alright." He held her tight, but was afraid to say the words he longed to say and which he was regretting never having said yet.

Kirk remained in the background, McCoy and his men took the injured Captain Pike to sickbay.

"Bridge?... Now?... Nasty little black hole out there?" Kirk gestured finally.

Spock and Uhura parted. "Yes, of course", Spock replied.

Quickly the three of them left the transporter room and headed to the bridge.


About ten minutes later a big singularity destroyed the Narada and the Enterprise barely made it out of the shock wave. The warp engines got a little shaken up and they would have to make it back to Earth by low impulse power. So the Captain gave all non essential personal some time off. He himself had to pay sickbay a visit and the Doctor had also demanded to see Spock.

"Ahhhhhh", Kirk gasped when a nurse tried to stabilize his dislocated shoulder.

"Sorry, Sir."

McCoy came over and scanned his chest and torso. "Two broken ribs. You got lucky."

Kirk shifted his sitting position on the bed.

"Does it hurt?" McCoy asked.

"No, only when I breathe."

McCoy instructed a nurse to take care of the broken ribs while he attended to Spock. A short scan showed him that the Half-Vulcan was okay. "You're free to go."

"Thank you, Doctor."

Spock left sickbay while Kirk moaned and cursed. His way lead him straight to a particular crew quarter. He touched the doorbell and Nyota's voice called "Come in".

"You okay?" she asked when the door closed behind him.

"Not really."

"I meant physical."

"Yes, I am cleared for duty."

She nodded and slowly closed the distance between them. "What will happen now? Will you… leave?"

"Why would I leave?"

"I heard some of the Elders talk."

He took her in his arms and she laid her head onto his chest. They stood silently for some moments.

"I am… torn... I do not want to leave the Enterprise, but I think my people need me. I would appear logic for me to assist the Elders in finding a new home world and setting up a Vulcan Colony." When he felt her tensing he made her look him into the eyes. "I am torn. I have not decided yet. I have to think."

She nodded and blinked a tear away. "I'm sorry. It's just so… much… And I'm so tired."

"You are sad."

Nyota turned and made a few steps, then sat down on her bed. "I'm sorry", she repeated. "I was so afraid when you and Kirk were on that ship… I remember again and again that we talked about being on the Enterprise. Together. That was only a few day ago, but it seems to be months. So much has happened. I just… I wished I could do something for you. I don't know what to say… You just lost your mother, your home planet and the bigger part of your people."

"As I said earlier – Earth is also my home…" Spock sat down beside her. "You are my home."

Nyota lifted her head astonished.

"Whatever I will decide, I would never leave you." He kissed her gently.

"We kissed in front of Kirk and the transporter room crew", she stated quietly after a little while.

"We did."

"Then you know that the entire ship will be in on us."

Spock just nodded, then – to Nyota's surprise – sort of smiled.

"Let them talk?" she asked and also smiled.

"Let them talk."

He kissed her again and realized once more how comfortable he felt when being with her. Though he was not sure what to do about his possible participation in rebuilding the Vulcan society, he felt that at last he was about finding… balance. Nyota had become a constant in his struggle between his home worlds. His inner conflict appeared to ease slowly. And suddenly he sensed that he would find truly peace when he stayed with her and arranged everything else around her and the Enterprise. Also, it actually was logical considering his feelings for her.