Takeshi looked down at Ami's phone. She had texted just minutes before, saying she was close to the apartment. He picked up his laptop and stuffed it into his messenger bag before sliding the bag's strap over his head so it crossed over his chest. He looked at Makoto, who he could tell was terrified of facing their bluenette friend. "Will you be okay?"

Makoto sighed and sat with a thump on the futon. "Does it matter," she asked, defeat in her voice.

Takeshi sat beside her, guiding the bag between his legs to keep it out of the way. "Don't go into it like that," he said, trying to comfort the amazon. "If you do, things will only get worse."

"I messed up so badly," she whispered, her voice cracking lightly.

"Not denying that," he replied. "But I'm trying to help you to fix it."

"Why?"

"Because I love Ami dearly and I want her happy. And you, dear Mako-chan, make her happy."

"Not lately," Makoto scoffed.

"Growing pains," Takeshi replied, standing and adjusting the strap on his shoulder. "I'm going to hang out in the hall until Ami gets here and then I'll be heading out to give you guys some privacy." And with that, Takeshi walked to the front door, opened it and stepped out into the hall.

After he had left, Makoto began to fidget inside the apartment. Her barely contained nervous energy got the better of her and she stood, pacing the small space while wringing her hands. A short while later, she could hear voices in the hall, or at the very least Takeshi's. She assumed the other belonged to Ami and her heart beat wildly in her chest. She tried to sit and wait patiently for Ami to enter, but her nerves compelled her to stand and pace again.

And that was the sight that greeted Ami as she walked into the apartment.

Makoto looked like a caged animal, pacing the way she was. The brunette's eyes were wild and Ami could see the barely contained energy wanting to break through. It terrified and aroused Ami at the same time. Memories flashed in her mind of the night they spent together and...

Ami coughed, her face burning.

Makoto turned to face the smaller woman but said nothing. Ami began to fidget under the taller woman's gaze and brushed her wet hair back from her face in a nervous gesture. Makoto made like she was going to approach Ami but stopped herself. Instead, she forced herself to sit down on the futon. After a moment, Ami moved to sit in the chair.

Thick tension hung in the air and the room seemed to be folding in around them. Makoto continued to stare at Ami and Ami stared at the floor. A deafening silence sat between them and neither knew how to breach it. What do you say to your best friend after having sex and then running away, Makoto thought.

They sat in silence for how long was anyone's guess. Minutes? Hours? It felt like decades. They had both been desperate to speak to one another, even if Ami wouldn't admit to it, and it was off to a great start. All of those silence cliches came to Makoto's mind. Even with the carpet, she thought if she dropped a pin she would hear it.

"How have you been," Makoto finally blurted out. She cringed as she heard the words and at her own stupidity.

Ami looked at her indignity "Do I even need to indulge that with an answer," she asked, a slight edge to her voice. Her blue eyes narrowed ever so slightly at the woman sitting across from her.

Makoto quickly shook her head and dropped her gaze to the floor. "No, I'm sorry. I just blurted out the first thing that popped into my head." Makoto swallowed and brought her gaze back up to Ami's. "But, how are you doing," she asked quietly.

"Hurt," came Ami's simple response. "And you?"

"Confused," came Makoto's.

Ami nodded and leaned back into the chair. She sighed, willing her tense muscles to relax. "I guess I have some explaining to do?"

"I think we both do," Makoto said light heartily trying to lighten the mood a bit. She even chuckled. She looked over at Ami, who didn't even crack a smile, her face as somber as it was when she came into the apartment. Makoto sighed under the icy glare.

"Should I just leave," Makoto asked.

"Running away again," Ami bit out.

"What the hell, Ami," Makoto growled. "I want to fix this! We need to fix this! If not for ourselves, then for our duties. We can't hate each other for all eternity."

"I don't hate you, Mako-chan," Ami said. Her face fell to the floor, tears stinging her eyes. "I'm just...I don't want to be hurt again." She looked back up at Makoto, her resolve wavering. "Why did you leave," she asked softly, pleadingly, her voice cracking.

It pulled at Makoto's heart to see Ami in that much pain. Pain she caused.

Makoto sighed. "I was confused and needed to think."

"So you left," Ami asked, her anger resurfacing. "Why didn't you talk to me? I wanted to before-"

"I know," Makoto replied quickly, almost angrily. She took a deep breath, let it out slowly. "I know," she said more calmly. "I got caught up in the moment and..." Makoto sighed again, a hint of a growl mixed in. She was frustrated at herself because she couldn't get the jumbled words in her mind to come out right. So many thoughts swirled inside her and she felt they were all trying to flood out at once. She felt it would be disastrous if they did.

Makoto's legs began to bounce in agitation. One arm she wrapped around her waist, the other, she chewed on her thumb nail. She glanced at Ami, who was waiting on more of an explanation. Tears were welling up in her green eyes as she looked away from her friend. "I wanted you," she whispered. "More than anything else, I wanted you. And it fucking terrified me." She choked on a sob. "I'm not supposed to want my best female friend and I have since the moment I saw you."

The tears in Makoto's eyes spilled over, her body shaking with her barely contained sobs. She looked at Ami and what Ami saw there chilled her. Makoto was terrified of her admission. Ami could see the years of pain of dealing with this on her own and it wrenched Ami's heart.

As Makoto's head fell, her sobbing finally wracking her body completely, Ami quickly moved from her chair to the futon. She wrapped her arms around Makoto's tall frame and held the woman as she cried. Makoto found the crook of Ami's neck and buried her face there, her hands coming up the clutch fistfuls of the back of Ami's shirt. Ami could feel heat on her skin from the exertion of Makoto's crying, which caused the auburn-haired woman's face to flush.

Sometime later, the pair found themselves laying down on the futon, their feet in the floor and their arms still wrapped around one another. Ami was brushing Makoto's hair back soothingly as Makoto's cries slowed to just mere tear trickles.

"Why aren't you meant to want this, Mako-chan," Ami asked when Makoto finally brushed away her last tear.

"I'm just not," came the husky reply.

"Why," Ami prodded.

"I..." Makoto's voice trailed off and she sighed.

Why couldn't she have this? What was so wrong about it?

"Because," Makoto began again, "I want a family. I want to get married."

Ami chuckled. "You think you can't have that if you're a lesbian?" Makoto only shrugged. She really didn't know. "First of all, if you want kids, you can adopt. Or there's always the option of a sperm donor." She brushed Makoto's slightly sweaty bangs from her face. "And marriage is overrated anyway," Ami scoffed.

Makoto had to chuckle at Ami's thoughts of marriage, at least a traditional one.

"All that matters is you're with the one you love and they're with you," Ami said. "And that you're both happy." Ami sighed softly, her cool breath tickling Makoto's warm face. "Nothing else really matters."

Makoto thought on Ami's words. While she felt Ami was right about most of it, other parts she couldn't bring herself to change her mind about. But she thought it shouldn't keep her from things that she wanted. She began to play with the collar of Ami's shirt, something to focus on while she thought. "How long have you liked me, Ami-chan," she asked softly.

Makoto felt Ami stiffen beside her for a moment before relaxing. Makoto, with their position, was laying slightly lower than Ami on the futon so she had to glance upwards at the bluenette. She saw her chewing on her bottom lip but wasn't sure if she was nervous or thinking; Ami would chew her lip while doing either of those. Finally, Makoto saw Ami's lip turn up slightly.

"During our second year of high school," Ami replied. Then she blushed. "I caught myself staring at you. I don't know why." Ami shrugged as her smile grew. "One minute, you were my best friend. The next, you were the most beautiful person in the room. I can't explain what changed." Ami laughed softly. "You were also the reason I realized I liked girls."

Makoto laughed at that.

"What about you," Ami asked, playing with Makoto's hair.

"I've always liked girls," Makoto said softly. "I just felt like I had enough issues without adding 'lesbian' to the mix." Makoto shrugged.

The room grew quiet once again. While not comfortable, it wasn't overly tense either. The two women laid there on the futon in each other's arms, the sun's rays casting shadows as it began to slowly set.

"What now," Makoto asked finally, pulling away slightly to look Ami in the face.

Ami stared at her friend, chewing on her lip again. "Well," she started, "you know where I stand. You're the only person I've ever wanted." She sighed. "But it doesn't matter what I want," she continued. "It matters what you want and how you feel about it. Because if you're uncomfortable with anything, we can't go forward with a relationship. But I will always be your friend, Mako-chan. Nothing will ever change that."

Makoto's gaze fell from Ami's eyes to her throat. It was the only thing level with her face. Makoto searched her heart and her mind. Did she want Ami? Yes, she did. But that did nothing to quell the confusion in her mind. It still felt...wrong, somehow.

Makoto brought her hand up and laid it on Ami's hip and felt some of the apprehension fade. If this was wrong, why did laying here in Ami's embrace calm her so? Makoto figured it was more Ami's personality itself and not her gender. Ami always had a calming effect on Makoto and she realized, had Ami been male, she would have had no problem with being with her. It was only Ami's gender that was stopping her. Part of her wondered why it even mattered at all.

"I can't say I'm completely comfortable with this," Makoto finally said. She brought her hand from Ami's hip and reached for one of the bluenette's. Squeezing it gently, Makoto laid a soft kiss on the back of Ami's hand. "But I love you too much not to at least try."

Ami's face broke out in a smile so radiant and Makoto felt herself melt. She released Ami's hand, grabbed the collar she had been playing with earlier and gently pulled Ami to her. Their lips met in a gentle caress that neither had experienced the last time they had met.

Yes, Makoto thought, I am so very willing to try.