Author's Note: Yay! Reviews on this story have crossed a century. I'm so glad… thank you all, who took your time in reviewing. Now, this is the second installment of 'There's Always Two Facades of A Mirror'. You're gonna see this chapter too through Damon's eyes. And yeah! this chapter is a virgin smutless chapter… we haven't had one in a while, ever since chapter 2. This chapter will show the mental conflicts of our big bad vampire and we'll see how he coped with all the pain Elena's caused him. You're gonna have to suffer from his coarse language and his dirty thoughts though. I'll zip my big mouth now (or I rather say my fingers)… Enjoy!
Oh, one more thing… I didn't proof read it. My sister (the pre-reader) is sick and I kinda lost track re-reading it and also I didn't want to guys to wait anymore… three weeks isn't enough already as it is… Just read it. If you find any typo or any kind of error, please inform me, I'll make a correction and repost it.
Disclaimer: I don't own TVD or any of the characters. They belong to L. J. Smith and Julie Plece.
Previously: Stefan stole Damon's daylight ring. Damon kidnapped Elena to use her as leverage against Stefan to get back his ring. Out of fury Elena spiked Damon's drink with vervain, then tortured him viciously and sabotaged his belongings. Damon got free and he raped her. Twice Elena conspired to murder Damon by staking him. But every time she missed his heart. Damon punished her and dumped her in the basement dungeon afterwards. There Elena tried to kill herself and failed… leaving Damon no choice but to tie her up and lock her in the cellar…
Chapter 8: There's Always Two Facades of A Mirror Part II - The Shaded Façade of A Mirror
I feel my soul being torn into this tug-of-war. The beastly predator in me screams to let go of the past, the all consuming guilt. Whereas a small old portion, the last remaining humane portion of me is deliberately trying to hypnotize me into holding on to that guilt, the shame and forcing me to feel the pain…all of it.
Damon's POV
I couldn't… I couldn't… even after trying my hardest, I couldn't let my humanity from winning. After I left her… Elena, locked up, tied up in the dungeon, I came upstairs and helped myself with a bag of warm AB negative with a big glass of bourbon, hoping helplessly that it's what I need to forget. But I had to had another one and then another one, until the blood running within my system was heated enough to throw the damn glass in the fireplace. The alcohol thrown into made the fire flare up instantly. My heart was more heated than the fire itself as rush of guilt, shame, despise hit me like a hurricane and blew away the beast that lived inside of me, the part that always fought to feel.
I tried to convert my guilt into rage. I tried to make my mind relive the pain all over again, that she caused by vervaining me, ruthlessly torturing me, staking me… twice. The more I though about what she did to me, I more I was forced to think about what I did to her… But it angered my mind enough that I destroyed a few things in our parlor, then up in Stefan's room. That's my favorite sabotaging corner in this whole damn place. When I was drunk enough to ignore those wrecking emotions and crack my funny side back, I came down. I bounced up and down in the parlor, beating madly with the ear shattering loud music while alternated drinking blood and bourbon, until my blood supply wasn't completely sucked dry and there's empty pouches scattered all across the floor accompanied by a lots of bourbon bottle. After consuming a lot of alcohol… and when I say 'a lot' it's a really, really lot, I tried to sleep. But I couldn't sleep. As soon as I dipped my dead bones onto my comfy mattress… her tearstained, blank face popped in my mind. I couldn't close even for a second without seeing her blank eyes piercing through my soul.
I tried my hardest not to let her in… not to let that heart cringing guilt in. But I couldn't.
I was in the shower trying to wash of the guilt, the disgrace that was tearing my entrails. That was when I saw the long, slender crack across the glass wall that's practically diagonally dividing the wall in two. This is where her back was slammed against as I mercilessly entered… no, no, broke into her. I pounded into her not even sparing her time to adjust. Fuck! She saved herself for her lover. Her first time should have been just like she dreamt, not even hoarse than her worst nightmare. This is where I pinned her as she begged and begged me to take mercy on her. But I didn't.
Rage flared up in my mind and before I even knew, an animalistic growl emerged from deep within my soul as my fist hit on the glass wall. It exploded into billion pieces and scattered all over bathroom. After I'd settled down, I immediately removed each and every tiny little piece of glass, let alone with the large ones. Then as soon as it got dark outside, I went to a hardware shop, then replaced the glass myself, not because I couldn't stand with the sight of the gravely situation of my flawless bathroom, but because I desperately wanted any and all evidence of those reasons to hate myself gone. I knew I was just fooling around. I caused more permanent damage than just cracking a glass wall, and worst part I couldn't that easily fix that. I don't think, I could ever fix this…
But still I gotta try…
I decided that I go to her and apologize. It's not like I don't have anything else to do right now… well, even if it is, I'm not doing anything because I'm bored. I'm doing this because… I don't know. I don't have any satisfactory explanation in behind doing this.
So here I am, in the kitchen, making dinner for Elena. I know she liked what I made her for lunch this noon… I atleast have this confidence that this ought to be the only things that's likable about me, the only way she could find me a little less monstrous is this food.
And besides, I have a diabolical masterplan… But that could either be the best thing for my approach, or the worst…
I keep thinking as I sprinkle the chopped parsley all over the Cheese Macaroni and turn large steel bowl over the plate so it's stays warm. I bring out the bowl of Chicken Marsala from the oven and do the same, so it stays warm as well.
I wash my hands under the flow, then turn off the water tap and wipe my hands dry with the tea towel draped on my shoulder. I mentally roll my eyes… what have they done to the guy who used to be a hoot? My brother and Elena… they literally turned me into a desperate housewife, making dinner, doing the household, screwing with hot neighbors… All my funs, scaring people, ripping open their artery as I feed from them as their screams satisfactorily bang in my ear everything's just zipped.
I live a simple vampire life now. I sleep by day, haunt by night… or I rather say, steal from the blood bank. Yes, that what I do now. I've been drinking from those fucking bloodbags that tastes nothing but chemical for too long now that I don't even recognize the taste of the warm heavenly nectar as it flows from the carotid artery on a lily-white throat. But that's not the thing I regret the most.
Lets say, I'm not a morning person…True. But there so much work to do that's impossible in the night even with the advantages of my compelling nature. I don't remember when was the last time, I missed the sun so much… and loathed with equal measure.
Well, thanks to my baby bro, I'm an owl now… spending all night awake, traveling around and a daytime pig… doing boring nonsense and sleeping throughout the day. Although I'm grateful to Elena too… because if it wasn't for her torture and making me chase her in the sun, I'd have never had the courage to stand under the sun. Now I can go out in low sunlight after the sunrise, before the sundown… it still burns though, but it's tolerable.
I walk down the stairs for the second time today. I stand by the door and peer through the bars… She's soundly sleeping…
I could hear the peaceful rhythm of breathing from up by the parlor. I glance through the bars as I stealthily unbolt the door and enter the cellar. Her back is faced towards the door as she sleeps on the bed by her side. That shirt I gave her last night to wear, my shirt that I ripped off her body this noon, that shirt, which I draped over her to cover her modesty, is still intactly draped over her body. Which by the way, covered only a very small amount of her skin. That shirt of mine was a loose fitted, full sleeves my usual black John Varvatos. But after her shoving a wooden leg of the broken chair through my chest and me ripping it across the middle this noon, it's barely recognizable as something as a shirt. It's more like a ragged piece of fabric now and matter of factly, it doesn't cover much than a tattered sack would have done. Her gorgeous ass is peeking through at some point But she didn't move much in her sleep, otherwise it wouldn't have been stayed on it's place. She's breathing rhythmically signifying she's very deeply asleep, with her hands tied securely behind her back. I slowly approach to the bed.
Standing by the edge of the bed, I bent down to her level. I silently extend my arms and reach for the messy knot that I tied ruthlessly around her wrists this noon. Not waking her, I untie the bond ever so gently. She still doesn't wake up, when I untie the loops completely from her hands. Throwing the rope aside, I made myself to observe her.
A sigh escapes my lips as my fingertips lightly trace over the circular fading bruise marks on her wrists. I slowly lean my head down and bring my lips to those marks. As soon as my cool lips touch with her aflame skin, she stirs awake. She sleepily whirls her head. The moment her sleepy, slightly parted eyes meet mine, her eyes widen in horror.
"Damon?" she shoots out, hurrying to recoil her extremely vulnerable self from me. It's then she realizes that I've released her hands. She hurriedly crosses her frail arms around her chest, desperately clinging the torn piece of shirt to her body, trying to cover her flesh as much as she could. The simple harmony of her heart is gone and now replaced with the pace of a frightened baby bird's. She tries to wriggle over to the other side of the bed, away from me. But before she could do that in the tangled mess of her body with the shirt and the sheet, I snake my arm around her middle, preventing her from going any further. She squirms in my arms, while still clutching that shirt around her body.
She's far more than afraid. But I'm not going to do what she thinks I'm going to. Nada… I have other business. I lower my face to her writhing head and whisper in her ear in a voice as soothing as I could manage, "Ssh… ssh… it's okay. I'm not gonna hurt you." I don't know if it reassures her or not, but I do feel her tensing more. She stops struggling though and lays still on the bed. Once she's almost calmed down, I gently pick her up in my arm… bridal style. I put extra care to it, while picking her up, making sure that I don't disrupt her covering in the process, so I don't send a wrong message to her. Yeah, I may be the wicked wolf all the times, but right now, my intentions are perfectly pure.
Standing up from the ground, I head for the door and exit the cellar. Elena lays still in my arm as I climb the stair to the hall… her confused glare fixed on me, trying to read my intentions. But she immediately fires up as I pass across the hall and start to walk towards the staircase that leads my bedroom upstairs. "Damon, where are you taking me to?" she demands.
"You're reeking… you're in desperate need of a good shower", I reply glancing down at her, then vamp speed upstairs towards my room and within a heartbeat, we're here… in my room. I rush towards my bathroom. Because I don't risk taking time so she starts struggling that accidentally induces me to drop her… The chances are very neglectable. But I'm not taking chances. Besides why not taking advantage of the advantages we have. I finally arrive at the shower and get inside of it. She glances at me with her big brown eyes getting wider in confusion, while clutching the ragged pieces of shirt around her chest as if her life depends on it. I silently set her on her feet as I enter the shower stall. She wobbles at first, then leans her back against the tiled wall and observes me carefully with her judgy mode on. Her innocent brown eyes stare at me as if trying to see through my flesh and body, through my soul. I turn on the water and lay my hand under the spray to check out the temperature of it. With the corner of my eyes I see her eyes restlessly following me. Once the water is warm enough for my cold dead skin, but not sizzling enough to actually hurt her. I slowly make my way to her. She studies me still trying to read my intentions. I take her hand in mine, then tenderly tug her with me in the shower stall. She stands tottering in the shower… all confused. "And I'm gonna make sure you have it," I state as I stand close to her.
Her eyes widen in horror as the realization hits her head that I'll will be the one to bathe her. It's okay. Because she needs to understand that I'm not gonna leave her here to have a shower alone, only to let her trying to commit suicide again by… I don't know… swallowing a bottle of shampoo, because I've removed everything and anything closely harmful for humans from my shower.
My razors, shaving kits, toilet cleaner acid, piece of glass everything is been safely transferred from here to… somewhere else. I had to work my ass on it because I've made a list of 'deadly dangerous', 'slightly dangerous', 'nearly dangerous' and 'not so dangerous' things earlier this morning… and the things from 'not so dangerous' column stays perfectly intact, while few of the items from 'nearly dangerous' things too stay. But to my doomster, I had to leave some of the items from the 'slightly dangerous' column… like I couldn't seal the electronic switchboards… like I couldn't do anything about the water heater. Even if I try my best to prevent it, it still might generate water hot enough to leave blisters on her skin. So right now 'slightly dangerous' that is column I'm the most worrying about, since I've sincerely removed each and everything from the 'deadly dangerous' column. Like I said, I've worked my ass on it…
I don't fucking remember when was the last time I was so worried about the things in innocent disguise, but lethal for humans. Fuck! I've never cared this much about my own safety before the way I'm securing places to places for her…
Elena winds her arms around herself in a protective embrace with the torn shirt in it. She clings the shirt to her body like a second skin, deliberately trying to minimize the amount of skin that is bared to me, due to the ragged condition of the shirt and backs away from me until her back hits the tiled wall of my shower.
I huff. Because that's all I can do right now. I've completely lost the ability to make her see that I'm actually not going to try anything else. I've ruined the state of talking things out. So without saying a word, I step towards her. Her jaws clench in rage as I near her. I slowly extend my hand to touch her shoulder and she slaps my hand away, while showering me with the venom in her eyes. "Elena, you need to clean up unless you wanna start having infections", I say softly as I extend my hand to grasp the rim of the torn shirt again this time more gently. And…
*BAM*
Elena drives a punch square on my nose. The intensity of it throws me a couple of feet backwards and the strength… well, the strength leaves me with a broken nose. I lift my hand up and take my nose in between my thumb and forefinger and unhinge the bone. Tears well up in my eyes at the instant… but it fades away soon. If I were as fragile as a human, I'd have been crawling on the floor for sure. Thank goodness! We're blessed with super fast healing ability. My second favorite trick about being a vampire, right after my very own mind compulsion trick. I touch my nostrils and there's blood seeping down. I wipe the back of my hand under my nose and sweep the blood away. See, I tried… I fucking try every time. She is the one that always have to wave raw meat in front of the animal I try so hard to keep caged inside of me.
I rush up to her and grasp her upper arm rather harsher than I originally intended. This flares her up even more. She starts hitting on my chest with her other hand with all her might. The harder she thrashes the rougher I clutch her other arm that leaves instant imprint of my fingers. "Damon, let go of me… let go of me…" she screeches through her gritted teeth, still shoving her hand on my chest as hard as she can, while her other hand still gripping the torn shirt around her in a death grip. I push her flat against the wall as she continues to fight. Her moisty chest heaves up and down with mine as she inhales and exhales sharply. Her heart is thumping aloud against my chest. I believe her lungs are burning from this angst too. Her cheeks are flushing crimson as all her blood comes visibly to the surface. The stem erupting due to the hot water spontaneously gushing down on the floor heats up this enclosed space between our entwined bodies even more. And the more she struggles the more she wears herself out. Once she's exhausted every muscle of her body she gasps frantically, hysterically. Then she raises her tear strained eyes and locks them with mine. "Please", she begs.
"You done?" I exclaim as I draw my hands away from her body and make a good show of it. Elena securely snakes her arms around herself and clutches the ragged shirt around her frail frame and continues to suck in the moist air frantically. "Because trust me or not, I'm not gonna do anything else… I intend to clean you up. That's all", I state calmly, boring my eyes into hers.
Elena keeps her eyes unblinkingly locked with mine for a long moment as her inhalation evens gradually. She stares at me with loads of confusion in her eyes. She finally gives in to me. She closes her eyes and leans her head against the cool tile. Her chest rises up as she inhales deeply before loosening her embrace…
The tattered piece of fabric skids her smooth skin and I feel it limply dropping at her feet. I fight the intense urge to look down. The dark serpent in my mind intentionally fills my head with her goddess like body naked and sweaty in my shower stall, in my arms. The dark serpent in my mind pushes me for looking down and take in her naked glory, just so he could contemplate how to lure me into ravage her once again. But I sharply ignore his every effort of making me submit to my lust. I strongly keep my gaze limited within her collarbones and upwards and never once let my dirty mind delude me to glance down at her, even though she's closed her eyes and she can't see me. I know she doesn't trust a single bit that I won't gape at her body even in this vulnerable state she's in and that's exactly why she's closed her eyes, because it'd disgust her to look me in the eyes, while my eyes feast on her body.
Without glancing, I reach down and grab her hand in mine. Then I gently tug at it, ushering her to the water streaming down. I glance back at her and see as she watches me with her eyebrows crooking on her forehead in a sweet, kissable frown. I give her the most assuring smile I could produce. I don't know if it reassures her or not, but she follows me wobbling, until we're standing before the hot spay of water. I bring my hand under the water once more to make sure the temperature. I slowly turn my head and pull her to stand under the warm water, so I'm standing completely out of the spray and warm water's pouncing on her. She flinches at the contact at first. I almost dread that the high temperature is hurting her. Concern showers from my voice as I ask, "Too hot?" I reach for the faucets in a heartbeat, but she nods her head 'no' and I put an end to my attempt to cool down the temperature. She closes her eyes in the sensation, as steamy water washes through her body. "Okay, just stay still and I'll wash you up," I state softly but she doesn't open her eyes. I let her soak in the delicate hot water for a good few minutes. Once she's completely dripping from hair to toenails, I turn off the shower faucet and grab the fancy bottle of body wash from the rack. It's hers…
I went to pick up her stuffs after sundown this evening. I figured it'd be good for her to be able to be in between her own stuffs. So I went to their Casa and grabbed her things as much as I could without getting any suspicions from her family. Her family believes she's gone to visit their family friends in Georgia anyway. So she obviously needed to pack some clothes. But I don't think one missing toothbrush and a fancy bottle of body wash and a bottle of Pantene would cause too much suspicion to Aunt Hottie of hers, because they don't share a same bathroom. And I don't think her jerk of a little brother would even notice his sister's missing things. He's too busy with his own world of drugs and cheap booze that he hides so preciously in his stinky shoes and shocks. But I always had to keep her Aunt in my mind… because she's creepily close to her niece. By the way if she checked Elena's closet she might get a heart attack knowing that her niece would probably be wandering about only in her night clothes and sleepers, because those are the only things I've taken. I didn't need to carry those skinny, clingy pieces of boring clothes, 'cause I'm sure not gonna take that Barrel of Suicide with me on some dark night date to the seven falls near the old mine, just so she could jump into the water and drawn and die while all I could do, is watch- no, thank you. Vampires hate to swim.
I squeeze some of the lily-lavender and white rose smelling sparkly body wash on my palm. The sweet floral smell hits her nostrils and her eyes flutters open. Now she notices and it shocks her. But the stony expression on her face says she isn't pleasured much that I snooped in her house to bring her stuffs. I give her my 250 kilowatt mischievous grin though as I place the bottle back on the rack and devour my attentions on lathering my palms.
"You're unbelievable, Damon", Elena says softly as a low scornful chuckle emerges from deep with her throat. My lips curve up in a cheeky smile, but I don't glance up from my hands, busy lathering foam with the body wash. "You fuck me one second... take care of me the next…" she speaks raising her tone. I glance up and find out that she's already seen the fresh, uncracked, new glass wall, as the dense steam surrounding us is diluting with time. She frowns at me before bombarding me with questions. "You say you don't like to play pretend. Yet you're awful one second… tender the next … What am I suppose to think about you? Is it good? Is it bad? pick one", she hisses glaring at me.
Yeah! I knew, I had it coming. So I just shrug my shoulder and start applying the bubbled up foams on her shoulders while jolting my lips up and recite the speech I've already worked ten times on, "Well, at least some of us can admit aloud what they want… unlike the rest of us, pretending to be good, while shielding what's really going on in their naughty little head from everyone…" And her face darkens in disgust. Yes! This is where my salvation lays… because I know she was drawn to me, even after all this she's still drawn to me like flies are drawn to shit. In maneuver all the bad stuffs, I didn't imagine I'd find out this important to me and this embarrassing to her though…
Last night I just wanted to humiliate her. That's all. But turns out she really had some secret to be ashamed of. Elena Gilbert, the golden girl of all the people… she'd saved her virginity as a gift to the one who she'd consider as her true beloved, her prince charming in the shining armor. And if we ignore the fact that how little whore like she acted as she tortured me with vervain two days ago and that little act shaded anything that was innocent about her and that was the one to be blamed for me being all monstrous and robbed her precious maidenhood, she still was a statue of the holy virgin. I mean, boy! I haven't seen girls this desperate for 'the one true love' to actually save their virginity and restrained themselves from all the hot fuss about that is called sex in ages and trust me, I've been on this planet for a very long time and I know plenty of things about girls and their secret desires…
But Elena Gilbert… she had me completely fooled. I had this suspection that she wanted me too since the first time we met. But she had it well shielded. So when I decided that I could compel her to kiss me, partly because I wanted to piss off Stefan, but mostly because I needed to pull out the passion she sees in me from deep within her heart, she just slapped me and I won't lie when I say, of all the slaps I've gotten from her lately that one hurt the most… Stefan already gave her the shitty necklace, he's carrying around for nearly a century. It was one of his collectables from his 'Ripper of Monroe' days back in 20s and worst of all he inserted vervain in it so that it keeps me out of her mind. Well, Baby Brother should have been more careful when I warned him that getting inside of her head wasn't my target. But it was because of that shitty necklace that I couldn't compel her right away and she just smacked me on the face. But before she did it, I didn't miss a flicker of emotions swiping through her face as I told her that she wanted me, that she thought about me even when she didn't wanna think about me, that she's even dreamed about me. I knew that because I was the one that influenced her dream the night before, before Stefan gave her the vervain necklace and ruined my fun…
But turns out, she didn't need my influence to lust after me. She a lot of things voluntarily before I could even contemplate them. Our precious little Princess waited herself for her beloved, while she had atleast two boyfriends according to my knowledge. This sort of girls usually have to satisfy themselves with temporary release touching themselves of thinking about their boyfriends or movie stars or super hot teachers, that is what norm is, isn't it? But she never felt the urge to touch herself thinking of them, yet she had masturbate fancying about me.
Wow! Who the fuck in this brilliant little world dare to think that Elena Gilbert would do such dirty things whilst thinking of me, her sweet boyfriend's wicked, mean older brother. Can't help being a little proud… or a lot. By the way, even when she couldn't be compelled she still was speechless as I exclaimed her lust for me. Wait… How come I didn't think about this before, she told me she masturbated thinking of me the night she had a sexual dream about me… so unless she secretly had more dreams without my influence, that was the night she did it. Holy Jesus! Thus the expression on her face, as I told her that I wasn't the only one having 'other intentions' about each other, that she wanted to kiss me right then. Because now I know she really did… utterly without my compulsion. God! The expression on her face was priceless.
I travel back to planet earth from my alien feelings of relishing in what it's like to desired by Elena Gilbert, only to be welcomed by her eyes stabbing spears, daggers, bullets as her nostrils flatten as she starts snarling like a venomous snake. "You're one fucked up malicious, evil monster…" she hisses through her gritted teeth.
"And you're in love with that fucked up dark side of me", I exclaim never breaking my strained gaze from hers. I'm partly confident with that, but when a small gasp leaves past her luscious lips and her pupils widens, I know she is. "You know you are. Otherwise you wouldn't have provoked him within every ten seconds…" I speak softly as I rub the back of her neck with one hand, while pulling her drenched hair up by the other. She exhales a long sigh and rolls her eyes at me. I gaze up. "I'm no good, Elena… I'm bad and I never lied about it…" murmur boring my eyes into hers, while stroking the back of my hand on her cheek and wipe off the trace of foam that was cutely smeared across her cheek.
Get a grip, Salvatore. Since when do you find sweet and cute… unicorns and rainbows? my subconscious scowls.
So I devour my attentions back to cleaning her up. I start wiping her hands, starting from her shoulders, sliding down her each arms, moving pass the fading bruise marks on her wrists and finally ending at her fingertips, lacing her fingers with mine, even foaming her palms thoroughly.
I gaze up at her and she brings her eyes to me at the same time, two pairs of eyes, one blue and one brown, lock for a moment before lowering our gazes down again on our intertwined fingers… Even after all this shit we've been going through, I could still feel the sparks flying, whenever and wherever I'm anywhere near her. I know she feels it too… either else she wouldn't have been this affected at our slightest touches.
I glance up at her again and inch my hands up her arms. I can practically see goose bumps appearing on her soaked bubbly, slick skin under my warm palm. I don't stop until my hands come to rest at the base of her neck, under her jaws. I tilt her face up, urging her to look me in the eyes. She tenses immediately. She gradually lifts her eyes up. Her undeniable lust for me has made her eyeballs darken almost to the point of pitch black. Her irises are normally dark chocolate, not too simple for human eyesight to detect the difference between her pupils and her iris, unless she's in the sun or in bright light. But right now all I see is pupil, no iris at all. I know mine are the same too. But there's a lot more evidence of our mutual arousal other than the dilating of our pupils. I'm steel hard inside of my jean… my erect member is painfully throbbing against the rough metal teeth of the zipper on my jeans. The addicting smell of her arousal is practically exploding my entrails. Even with the floral smell of the body wash I'm using on her, the smell of her arousal is flooding past my nostrils and hitting me directly on my brain like waves of tsunami, making me groan inwardly, making my cock pulsate with an intolerable need.
God! if I could bottle this sent and preserve it forever with me, I would.
Ever so slowly I glide my hands down, still keeping our eye contact intensely intact. My hands skim across her collarbones before sliding lower. I groan as I feel the softness of her flesh under my probing fingers. She gasps audibly as I take her perfect mounds in my palm, feeling their weight. Her nipples are completely and utterly hardened. The beast down there is standing impossibly erect, threatening to sprout free any moment from it's jeans prison. I try not to forget my original mission in here, not to relive the fantasy that the dark whore of my mind is desperately ushering me to go for. But her responses to me isn't helping me to keep the beast in check. She's constantly gasping, panting, her cheeks are flushing crimson, her lungs are intaking immense amounts of air within, pushing her chest uncontrollably up against my palms as I softly massage her breast. Her heart rate has increased to the point that I could feel it on my right palm, leaping up and down under the layer of her sweet flesh. My unnecessary breathing is so rasping right now, as if I'm running hundred and twenty kilometers an hour, not standing idly… giving a body scrub to my beautiful hostage. I don't dare lower my gaze down under her collarbones. Because if I so much take a single glance of her perky nipples that are tauntingly poking on my palms, all I'll be doing would be taking them in my mouth and suck them until they're red and all covered in bruises from my assaults. I nearly explode in my pants as she murmurs my name lowly, rolling her eyes close, throwing her head back as I stroke the undersides of her breasts. My canine's sharpen at the sight of her moisty, lily-white throat exposed to me. Blood rushes to my eyes, highlighting the oh so well-known spots on her neck, making her each pulse thud against my eardrums, blurring the rests from my sight. I could practically see through her silk skin and watch blood pumping fast through her arteries. The warmth of her blood is practically radiating in the air. My urge only stimulates as I remember the unique taste of her maiden blood that I drunk that night while I popped her cherry.
Sure her blood would taste somewhat different now, now that I've taken her innocence and I need to taste the difference myself one last time. My hands stop grazing on her skin, that might be the cause to draw her back to reality. My too-absorbed-with-her-pulse-rate ears deny to hear the shrill shriek coming out from her, my eyes try to ignore the fact that my original appearance has drained every ounce of blood from her face, her eyes are bugging out in fear as she bucks away from me as far as possible, until hitting her back against the tiled wall. Her chest heaves up and down in anew tempo as she helplessly shudders, shakes hysterically. Like a little lamb before a big bad wolf. And the more struggles the more the beast in me howls, stalks around in our predatory satisfaction. But a voice in the back of my head also shrills not to do it, because if I do it, I somehow know I wouldn't be able to control my lust tonight, that's how much effects she have on me. She's bewitched me completely. I lost control of myself beyond my limits. But now I do know if I don't control my bloodlust, I'd be the death of her… and I don't want that. Obviously not. I sharply bite on my bottom lip, my own razor-sharp canines jab into my pulp lip. The flavor of my blood tastes bitter to my own tongue, compared to what I fantasy the flavor of hers, but the pain shooting through my pierced lip seems to tame the beast a little. My good heart does the rest.
I close my eyes, inhale deeply and I don't open my eyes until I feel my human façade back on track. And when I open my eyes, I see her… eyes closed, head tilted backwards, her body relaxed, no trace of wariness in her face, as if none of these has ever happened. WHAT? Then I realize none of these really has actually happened. My hands shoot away from her body, and I fling my body a couple of feet backwards in awe. I could still feel the tangy, salty taste of my blood lingering in my lips. Means that I've beaten it for real. But there's no trace of horror, fear in her relaxed features. Means that my vampire instinct had really tried to take over, but a subconscious part of my mind gave me this hallucination to prevent all these from happening for real. What? Am I fucking delusional now? I find myself asking. She's completely wrapped me under some kind of spell - some dangerous, dark spell. She's screwing with my subconscious, making me see things that aren't real, making me believe that they are very real. I don't know how to control my own mind anymore.
I stand still for a few moments of utter confusion, trying to take in if this isn't another lame trick of my mind. The absence of my touch brings her back to actuality. Just like it did in my vision. But only this time, I'm sure as hell, I'm not looking as my freaky monstrous original self. My vampire instincts are well hidden under the façade of my human disguise. But I still feel a lump in my throat as she little by little opens her lids hooded with thick eyelashes. I chew my bottom lip harder just to be sure that my fangs no longer exist. She looks at me standing afar from her. Her chocolate orbs bore into mine in confusion. She parts her moisty lips to say something. But nothing comes out. We stand there in an awkward silence for a moment or two. She stares into me trying to understand what's happened to me. I stand there for the same reason.
When I realize it's to real to be a vision, it's me to be the one to break the silence. "Ahm…" I cough clearing my throat as I sprint towards the rack of toiletries. I loosely stroll through the items, until I find what I was looking for- pale gray loofah. "I think, we should use this instead", I murmur turning my gaze back to her, praying that she'd approve so it decencies our erratic job a bit. She approves nodding her head lightly. I smile in relief and reach for the bottle of body wash. I squirt a globe of the thick liquor on the soft loofah, before lathering it in my palm.
Once that thing is all foamy and ready, I slowly get down on my knees on the wet floor before her, not caring my Armani jeans are soaking with foams and water. To steady her frail body, I place a hand on her hip and hold her still. With my other hand, I glide the foaming loofah down her torso, carefully rubbing her sides, not tickling her in the process… and all I feel is how silky her skin is even if there's this loofah separating our skins from actually touching. My breath hitches at the feel of it… I reach down, until I'm lathering her hips. I notice there's a few reddish bruises on the side of her hips, imprints of my fingers due to grabbing her roughly earlier these days, which aren't completely healed yet. I feel this intense urge to kiss 'em away… but what's the point? I mean us vampire's have the ability to lick a cut cured, but that sure as hell doesn't mean licking a bruise would have the same effect. Because when we lick to cure a cut, we do it to insert our saliva within the gap in the skin, because our saliva has more or less the healing ability as well as our blood. But bruises are formed under the layer of the outer skin, so no matter how much I lick… I know by heart, I won't be removing a single bruise on her skin, if not give her more hickeys… So I jab daggers in the urge to kiss her skin and skim the loofah lower, wiping her lower belly as professionally as I could manage. And suddenly all my professionalism slips away as my hand holding the loofah reaches the border of the slight patch of dark hair on her pelvis. And suddenly I realize, no matter how fucking much I tried to shut off my ears completely, they didn't miss a single sigh, single gasp that escaped her lips. And now that she's almost panting, groaning, my auditory nerves gladly carry those sound straight to the animal, caged deep inside of my heart and practically whiplashes it. My breathing labors immediately and my undead/dead heart starts thudding loudly in my chest. What am I? horny fifteen? But help me, God! I'm so close to where my heart contains… but I can't do anything. I shouldn't. So wisely I slide my hand away and start lathering her outer thigh.
Fuck! Bathing her was the worst decision you've ever made, my inner mind growls in rage.
I partially agree with my mind… and partially, I'm so hell-bent on proving it wrong. I start to exhale more and inhale less as I scrub her thigh. Because the more her intoxicating sent gets inside of my head the more the dark serpent in me pushes me to suck in more of the smell of her arousal. And if I by accident step in his trap, I don't think I'd be able to control myself from simply darting my tongue out and start licking her little pussy like a fucking Labrador and don't stop until I make her come, screaming my name louder than she's ever done, until she splashes her sweet juice all over my face, my tongue. I keep that serpent whipped relentlessly while I as well ignore the fact that my mouth is practically watering at the sight of her wet pussy just barely inches away from my eyes, practically inviting me. But to my ultimate shock, I see her pushing herself a bit forward to me. May be she wants this too… I shake my head at the though of it… because may be she's just trembling, may be she can't stand steadily from the treatments she's been receiving from me lately as the punishment of her misdeeds. Or may be she's just testing me to see how restrained I am… she's done that before. I keep myself strictly in control, even if my body and a huge part of my mind do not agree with that. I keep my gaze focused on her bare, endlessly long legs… I rub the foamy loofah thoroughly up and down on her legs, behind her knees, her feet one by one. When I'm finished scrubbing her legs well, I find myself in front of her little pussy. I huff as I restrain my basic instincts. I peek through my lashes and glance up at her… and see her eyes glued with mine. I see bizarre types of emotions in her eyes… it's confusing one second, welcoming the next… it's spiteful one second, lustful the next. But when she parts her legs slightly and pushes her hips a bit forth, giving me a perfect view of her honeyed center… swollen in need, my immense urge is to shoot up from the damp floor, tear free my impatient fellow from it's prison, push her up against the wall, wrap her legs around my waist and bury myself balls deep in her tight little cunt, then pound into her until I don't break her or just pass out for hours as I explode deep within her womb.
God! this must be my toughest challenge of my entire existence… I know what she wants me to do, she knows what I want to do… yet we both know, we can't do what we both want…
I tame my beast as hardest as I could and slowly rise from the floor. "Turn around", I order coldly and she complies. I scrub her bare back, not even glancing down for a single moment. But my cock twitches voluntarily as my hands graze across the soft, unblemished skin on her ass. When her back's been thoroughly scrubbed, I ask her to turn again. This time more gently… and she does.
This is when, I notice my jeans is dripping from knees down. I would be needing to change it later. Not that I'm getting a pneumonia from it or something, but still… I wouldn't want to drip foams and water on my floor and thousand dollar Persian rugs. Well. Well. Isn't it thinning the tension in between us? I look into her confused and somewhat relieved eyes before I stretch out my hand and grab the bottle of Pantene from the rack. As I squirt some shampoo on my palm, she rolls her eyes and reaching for the bottle she says, "Just let me do it myself." I don't even pay attention to her as I close the lid of the bottle and place it back on the rack before devouring all of my attentions on my palms lathering up the shampoo.
"You might wanna close your eyes now", I say glancing at her with a smug grin plastered across my lips as I approach to her. She huffs in the realization that I'm not gonna let her do it herself and closes her eyes squeezed shut after giving another of her eye roll, I'm getting so familiar with. I apply the foam on her head and start massaging her scalp.
"I could do it myself, you know", mumbles Elena.
I scoff, shaking my head and continue to massage the shampoo on her scalp, lather up her hair, until her head is nothing but fluffy, fuzzy ball of love… her entire body is covered in bubbles, foams. And with her eyes squeezed shut, nose wrinkled, she just so… adorable right now. My Fluffy Kitten, I chuckle as her new pet name pops in my head… and it's a cute one. All I want to do right now, is pull her in my embrace. Fuck my five hundred bucks shirt. I just wanna crush her right now, hugging and kissing, even if that means consuming the foam that's sprawling all over her skin. But I know that'd destroy the atmosphere, she would never see it the way I see it is, she'd believe that it's another one of my dirty intensions, that I wanna take advantage of her this vulnerable state. And she has every right to believe so, because I haven't given her a lot of reasons to believe otherwise lately. So I abandon the idea, as if this awkward proximity isn't enough already. I keep working on her. I could feel her relaxing, the tensed muscles on her shoulders relaxing as I gently scrub her hair. She lets out a small whimper as I scrape my blunt fingernail lightly on her scalp. That only encourages me. I keep up massaging her hair and grazing my fingers at the nape of her neck in light strokes, applying pressure on some particular points. She starts meowling from the pleasure of it. The wrinkles on her eyelids and nose are fading as every bit of tension is gradually releasing her system. Whining she begins to lean in to my hands as my encouraged fingers work with more deftness on her. An invisible force tugs me towards her, as uncontrollable moans slips through her slightly parted lips and I don't notice as my lips are hovering over hers. As soon as her rose petal like soft lips touch with mine, her eyes fling open and she backs her head a few inches away from mine.
"Monster", she whispers boring her gaze on me… her usual chocolate eyes burning in rage brighter than the sun itself. Hell! if looks could burn, I'd have been on fire by now. So she really was testing me. She's been seducing me and tempting me… while all she wanted to do was fucking checking on how much control I was in. Fuck! I'd almost set foot in her trap. If I couldn't restrain myself… if I had done what I wanted to… then? Fuck! Shit…
Damn! You got played again. How's that, Oh clever ol' player?
This fuels up my rage and that instantly pops the romantic bubble that was naturally formed surrounding us. I grasp her shoulders roughly and jerk her furiously, glaring at her. "I am a monster, Elena", I say almost yelling, rolling her name with my tongue… elongating it. "… but atleast I've never hidden from it", I say gritting my teeth in anger.
"You say it like I lured you into raping me… torturing me", Elena snaps looking straight into my eyes.
"Well, you were not exactly innocent, Elena", I snap back, shrugging my shoulder carelessly.
"I tortured you, hurt you. But you're the one who kidnapped me for no reason in the first place", she finishes and I give her the look. She rolls her eyes in annoyance and speaks again, "Yes! I know there's the big reason… but why did you have to drag me in between your brother bickering? What have I done to offend you in my past life?" Elena breaks into tears, "That you took… you took everything from. Everything I had left is a complete waste now… and you won't even let me die. Damon, why? Why?" she asks sobbing and sniffing, while grabbing my collars, jerking me harshly, "You raped me even after I begged for forgiveness … you raped me, Damon, even after I told you that I was a virgin."
"Should have thought about this before you planned to torture me?" I grunt sheepishly, hanging my head low, breaking the our eye contact. The intensity of it is just maddening. Because I still haven't gotten rid of the fact that I've taken something that was probably more precious than life for her and whenever I'm not the blood sucking freaky monster, my heart cringes in my chest worst than having dozens of stakes pierced through it. I numb my brain thinking of how can I make it up for her… until I realize that there is no way, I can make it up for her. I can't do that no matter how hard I try… I can't ever. I can compel her to forget all this happened… I can make her mind go back to the time where she was still virgin, but knowing that it would be wrecking her even more and no matter what I can't make my own mind forget what I did to her, haunts me. So whenever my still the part of my mind that's still has humanity overwhelms me, it pains me more than I can express. But I always do a nice job of shielding it though. Because one great wise man once told me 'never show anybody know what causes you pain, because once they know what causes you pain, they'll hurt you exactly where it hurt'… and that great wise man certainly is my own subconscious.
"I've never in my worst dream dreaded that YOU would do that to me", she shouts as she shoves me on the chest a few times, until before I capture her both hands in mine.
"Why? Because I didn't kill you at the first sight, like I did to the other townies?" I roar back as she cringes in disgust, fighting to release her hands… the slickness of the foams is making it hard to hold her already. "Or because I wastrying to be nice to you after I brought you here?" I roar as she finally succeeds to release her hands from my grip. I could have hold tighter… if I wanted to. But I've got other plans. I coil my fingers at the nape of her neck, tilting her face up, forcing her gaze to meet mine. I say softly as I'm gazing unfathomably into her, "I'm not nice, Elena and you knew it… Yet I was reliable not to let anything bad happen to you, because I brought you here, you were my responsibility. It was my responsibility to keep you safe. But what you did to me, you know anyone, anyonewould have done the same as what I did to you."
The intensity of my eyes, makes her shift her gaze away from mine almost immediately I'm finished. I observe her as her breathing evens with time and she wipes the tears from her cheeks with the back of her hand. "You could have punished me normally… you didn't have to do–" she sniffs after a long time.
"Normally?" I yell in disbelieve. "Elena, do you not realize what you've done to me?" I yell as I shake her shoulders violently, "I'll tell you what if it wasn't me, any other vampire, do you know what they could have done? They could have bathed you with acid just to give you a piece of pain that you caused by the vervain. And about those stakes, they could have made a hole through your heart and healed you afterwards and repeated the process over and over again." Her eyes well up in tears again as she re-starts weeping. I truthfully declare what any other vampire could have done to her, "Or they would have haunted you in your sleep. Vampires can easily get inside your head and make you see things that aren't real, make you feel that they are real. When you've come to the stage that you can't for one second close your eyes without being haunted in your worst nightmare, you'd be begging for death and when you try to end your life yourself, they make sure that you live a very long life with that maddening situation, until you get insane. Or better yet, they would have simply gathered every single person you've ever known, including your most beloved ones and killed them the most painful way possible, while you watch."
This wrecks her completely. "You're monster… all of you… you're the abomination of nature…" Elena screams, crying hysterically.
"Do you think, it would have made any difference if you were kidnapped by a human, instead of a vampire?" I blurt out, grasping her cheeks painfully in between my thumb and forefinger, "No, Elena… it wouldn't have been. He would have done the same, only if he had survived your acid, fire and stabbing torment", she gasps hearing this and tries to twirl her face away, trying to break our eye contact. But I don't release my grip on her cheeks as I force her to look at me and I continue, "Yes, Elena! That's exactly what it would feel like to him, if your captor was a human. The way you tortured me with vervain would feel like you decanting bottles of concentrated acid to your human captor, the way you burn me in the sunlight, while I was tied to the bed would feel like tying him to the bed and setting the bed on fire to your human captor. Then the way you drove the stakes through my chest and missed my heart multiple times would have been equivalent to shoving daggers in his chest over and over again… missing his heart and stabbing him in the lung," Her face slips away from my grasp and she immediately covers it with both of her hands in pure disgust. Only this time I know her disgust isn't because of me… I remove her small hands from her face as I continue to say, "Elena, look at me. It would have been like slashing his lung into shreds… so he dies a very painfully long death, struggling for breath, coughing his lung out for hours."
"You call me the Monster… If I hadn't have the fast healing ability, you would have realized you're not that far away from the dreaded 'M' word. I'm a strong vampire and I have a very good tolerance. But just because I heal quickly, doesn't mean that I didn't feel the pain. I felt it all. Hell! If it could have been my dear little bro, he wouldn't have survived your assaults either, Oh! Warrior Princess," I says as the matter of factly, "And yes! If our guy had survived your terrible assaults… he'd have done the same to you. You should understand, the way you tortured me is not one bit less horrible than what I did to you", I state. But somehow inwardly I know, I was the one horrible around here. No matter how much I accuse her now, for tormenting me, I've always healed… I've taken something from her that's never going to be the way it used to be. I've played with her emotions, I fucking ruined her belief.
I watch as she crumbles crying in disgust on none but herself. Somewhere in the back of my head, I keep thinking that she didn't deserve this pain too after everything I've done to her. I shouldn't have hurt her this way. But I'm a fucking Asshole and I always say first think later. She eventually calms down. Then Elena asks me sniffing, "Do you – sniff – Do you guarantee that you would have restrained yourself if I hadn't?" if she hadn't what?... torture me? Yes! No. I don't know… Seeing me remain in silence, she repeats herself glaring at me, "Do you, Damon?"
"Who knew?" I say in a bare whisper, keeping my gaze fixed on nothing in the air. "I know, I've always wanted you. I know, I've been wanting you since the first time I laid my eyes on you and I was pretty hell-bent on making you mine… but this could have gone in a completely different way. I told you, in all my life I've done this only to a few unfortunate ladies. And for the record, they all did the same mistake of trying to kill me and for their ill-fates I survived their attacks", I say truthfully before boring my eyes into hers and saying in a more serious tone, "I'm the bad guy, Elena… and I've done a lot of awful things. Robbery, stealing, manipulation, abusing… the list never ends. I've killed, Elena. I've killed hundreds of people, drained them dry, ripped off their body parts… then I'd buried them in unmarked grave, only if I felt like covering my tracks… otherwise I'd let 'em rot or the police to find the body and have them do my dirty work and cover those murders for the sake of animal attacks." She can't help as silent tears roll uncontrollably down her cheeks as I go on. But she needs to hear it. Yes. This is the bitter truth of my life and I've never hidden from it.
"So. Yes", I declare as I grab the hand shower and turn it on, "I would have been a complete dick all the times… and seduced you to the submission of your desire for me", I say holding her shoulder with my free hand, looking straight into her eyes, "But, raping isn't really my thing… I don't need to force women into wanting me. They come to me willingly. And I think, if none of this would have happened, you would have still come to me a mouth later or maybe a year later… I think you would have come willingly."
"I would have never…" I hear her whisper lowly, shaking her head in denial. I look at her bent head for a few moment before finally grasping that water is endlessly running down from the showerhead I'm holding in my hand. I check out temperature on the back of my hand once and make sure it's adequate for her, then start pouring the water do her.I wash her body thoroughly with the hand shower, carefully rubbing the slippery foams away from her body with my other hand as I do so.
"I guess, we'll never know…" I say more to myself than her. I snap out of my dream state and command, "Close your eyes", and she does. I bring the showerhead to her hair. She closes her eyes tighter as cascades of foaming water streams down her forehead her face. I run my free hand through her hair in order to cast away the suds faster. Once the water no longer consists of bubbles, I'm sure that she's all flawless and sparkling again, I turn off the faucet and rest the showerhead in it's holder on the wall.
"Listen, Elena. What I did to you was horrible… but it could have gotten worse", I speak sheepishly. We stand in there, her eyes hung down and mine fixed on her. Then, I remember… this awkward shower has taken enough time already, I don't want her to get cold or fever from it. I run out of the still foggy shower stall and return within seconds with a large fluffy white towel in my hand. She stands still as I pat her body dry with the towel. Once her skin is dry enough, I towel dry her hair too. "There… good girl", I murmur. She doesn't fight me for once. Just stands still as I rub, pat her hair with the towel. I could have gotten two towels, one to wrap around her hair and the other for her body, but it totally slipped my mind. After I'm done, I remove the towel from her body, before wrapping it firmly around her small frame. And she fully cooperates. She lifts her hands high enough for me to twirl it around her and I finish it tucking the edge in between her cleavage. As I take in her feature, I try my hardest to not let that stupid smile creep across my lips. Because she really looks picture of the year right now… in the fluffy white towel, her ashamed face bowed to the floor, guilt has widen her doe eyes even more and most of all her toweled dry hair, is a perfect specimen of a crow's nest. I have to remember to keep safe distance while she brushes her hair. Because she's sure as hell gonna throw the comb at me.
"There's some clothes I've brought for you... you can put those on, while I go downstairs and get you something to eat," I state and lifts her doe eyes to me as my voice has snapped her out of whatever she was thinking. Perfect, now that I have her attention, I begin my business. "Now, I need you to promise me that you won't do anything stupid which you'll immensely regret later. Because I'm don't want to be harsh to you anymore… I want this to be the way I planned when I brought you here…I wanted you to live a normal life in here, until Stefan brought back my ring. I wanted you to be happy… then I was gonna safely take you home after Stefan returned my ring. These things that happened in these days, I never contemplated that things would become this messy. I know everything that happened, we can never forget, both of us. But if we let go of the past for a few more days, and tolerate each other, we could really prevent things from getting any nastier. Elena, I can't undo what I did in these days and I know I'm not worth your forgiveness. But I can show you things didn't have become like this… we didn't have to be in this situation, if you let me. I can show you how I intended to pass these days. Elena, I know things won't be the same after what I've done… but if you hold on to the hope of 'what could have's, you'll find the motivation of your life and you'll actually look forward to live more" I say. Damn! Why do I sound like my dead-dead grandmamma? I enclose our distance once again as I tenderly grab her shoulders, until my eyes are inches away from hers. "So Elena, can you promise me that you won't do anything stupid while I bring you some food? Because if you don't I'm gonna have to compel you… which I really won't like one bit", I speak, holding her gaze.
"I don't trust you", she says coldly, looking directly in my eyes.
"And why should you?… but remember, the day I brought you here I promised you that I'd never hurt you if you don't give me a reason to… that I'd never use mind compulsion on you unless you do something that makes me to…" I say cupping her face in both of my palms because I'm not sure if she remembered or not, "I know it's hard for you reason that considering everything I've done in the past couple of days, but if you sometime manage to think with you mind cooled, you'll realize that I've never broken those promises I made. So you maybe not trust me, but I trust you enough to let you here in my room, without compelling you to behave", I speak softly before turning on my heals to the door. I undo my dripping jeans and strip down to only shirt and my dark blue boxers on my way out of the bathroom and throw the discarded jeans in the laundry bag around the corner.
Hurray! Mission impossible accomplished.
Author's Note: I hope you guys liked it… the softer side of Damon and the push n pull tension in between them. Please, please, please leave a review and let me know your thoughts…
The next chapter is the third installment of 'There's Always Two Facades of A Mirror'. Yes, I kinda didn't have a choice but to break it in three… Damon has had so much to say, that I couldn't put it all in one chapter… I planned on breaking it in two, then ended up breaking it in three chapters. I hope it didn't irritate you guys that there's nothing in this chapter but a very detailed shower and Damon's dark fantasy that consumed nearly 10k words… Well, if it did, feel free to tell me and I'll try to reduce the word limit next time. I'm almost done with the next one. It should be up soon. But no promises, I noticed I tend to break more promise than make.
Sorry for not updating sooner guys, I was totally hooked by a story on Wattpad- 'The Whore of Babylon' (Don't judge by the name) by TudorPrincess… it's a story of a ruthless Prince corrupting his own sister in law, but slowly falling in love with her, slowly changing himself for her… This is a historical, non-teen fiction, centered on ancient Babylon. This truly is an amazing story and a very dark theme story *winks*. It gave a few ideas for my own story. So if you are a dark theme lover, like I'm obsessed with and you're on Wattpad, then please check it out. It'll be worth it.
