Chapter 8

The next morning when I woke Haldir was up and getting dressed for the day, which really did not surprise me. I could tell he was healing nicely from the way he was moving.

"Haldir, where are you going? Why are you leaving? You promised."

I sat up in bed, he came and sat on the bed facing me. "Shash, I know I promised that I would not leave you but I must talk with Lady Galadriel."

"But why, what's done is done there is no need to go over it. Please don't."

He gently took my hand in his, "I do not agree on the way she handled this situation concerning you. I do not like what it has done to you. There must have been a better way, I am one that has never questioned her on anything but I have to this time!"

I knew he was upset and there was nothing I could do to stop him, "Haldir, can you do it later? Please? Could we just go to your private spot and spend the day?" I tilted my head giving him that look when we want something from our man. I was not sure it would work on the Marchwarden at the time though.

He smiled, "Is that what you want to do, spend the day there? "

"Yes please, can we? But if you have other duties I would understand."

"Of course we can, I have some things to do before we leave, but I will be back in a few hours, I promise." He leaned forward and gently kissed me on my forehead.

"I promise I'll be ready by the way how is your shoulder?"

"My shoulder is doing much better and the same for my leg all because of you. Lyndia is coming to see you so please do not get dressed just yet."

I looked at him a little awkwardly, "What have you done, Haldir?" He was getting up to leave when he stopped at the door, "Just a little something for you that is all, I hope you like it." He smiled and left.

I hated that he left but I needed some time to myself to sort through what had just happened to me, I had hoped that it was all just a dream but it wasn't, my father was an elf! What the hell am I supposed to do with that? All I know is that my entire life has been a lie and that is just more mess on my plate, I feel like I am at my breaking point! I have so much to deal with when I get back home, where do I start? I shook my head in frustration. I knew it was all real and I was going go have to deal with the mess and things here too. I got out of bed put my robe on and sat on the balcony to listen to my blue birds that visit me every morning.

They were pleasant to hear, but my mind went right back to my "messy plate" of problems. I have to tell Katara about my father and myself. I wonder how she will react to hearing that will she even believe me. Then I have to rip her world apart by telling her that James beat, raped and threatened me? How do I do this? How do I tell my best friend, my sister about what her brother did to me? But then I run the risk of putting my own life in danger. I remember that day so vividly and what he said as he painfully twisted my hair around his hands and yanked me up to look at him, "You tell my sister, I will find you and finish what I started!" Just that thought alone still sends chills up my spine and I haven't told Haldir about this threat to my life, I want to tell him but I can't because I know he would never let me leave without him and I need to do this on my own. But knowing Haldir he would be upset with me for even blocking this from him in my thoughts. I was so deep in thought I did not hear Lyndia come in to the room.

"Shashuwan, did you not hear me knocking?"

She startled me, "Lyndia, I am sorry I heard nothing, I have so much on my mind right now. Please forgive me." She sat on the chaise facing me and gently took my hands in hers. The look on her face was so sincere and heart felt.

"That does not matter. How are you?" she asked with a worried look on her face.

I managed a small smile, "I have seen better days in my life. Second to my rape, this has been the worse. I feel numb all over."

"I will not say that I understand because I can not. We do not know of such violence among our own people. It may happen outside Lothlorien, but few of us venture outside this realm. All I know is that I care for you like a daughter and Haldir loves you more than you will ever know."

I smiled, "That is the brightest part of my day, thank you."

"I have something for you that he wanted you to wear and I am to pack you a few things."

"Really, what is it?"

She left the balcony and came back with a beautiful yellow gown it was exquisite, "For me? He had you make this for me, why?"

"He wanted see you in a gown that mirrors the depth of color in your eyes. He hoped that you would wear this today, will you?"

"I will but it seems that this would be worn for a very special event wouldn't you think that Lyndia?"

"I do not know the Marchwardens thoughts he keeps them to himself."

"Well, I had better get dressed I don't want him to have to wait when he arrives."

Lyndia was packing my satchel while I was getting dressed and I decided to where my hair up because it was so warm. Sometime I don't know how the elven women wear the long gowns all the time if I were home I would have on shorts and a tank top. But then it doesn't matter, I tell myself with a shrug, because sometimes the heat bothers me and then there are times it does not faze me at all. Well I guess I know why now don't we dad.

I left the bathroom and asked Lyndia to lace up the back of this beautiful gown when I turned to let her see me, she said nothing.

"What is wrong Lyndia did I mess up the gown already?"

"No, it is perfect he will love it. Now put your slippers on and this." I went out to the balcony to keep myself from sweating and put my slippers on.

"What is this?"

"It's a small bottle of the sweet musk like the fragrance you bath in, only it is an oil just put a small amount where ever you want." I applied it to the back of my neck, a little down my cleavage.

I tried to return it to her but she said, "No that is for you to keep a present from me for you to take back with you. While I was talking with Lyndia there was someone at the door I went to answer it and found Rumil, his brother.

"Well, hello Rumil what can I do for you?"

"My brother asked me to give this to you hoping that you would wear it this afternoon."

He handed me a beautiful white pouch, I opened it and looked inside. What I found took my breath away. I pulled it out and held it in my palm.

"It's beautiful, Rumil. Where did he get it? I have never seen anything so exquisite."

"He said he would explain when he sees you and that he is waiting for you in the courtyard."

"Thank you, Rumil." I slipped the necklace over my head Rumil smiled and left.

"Shash, what did Rumil need?"

"He gave me a gift from Haldir."

"Well what is it?"

"It's a necklace. I have never seen anything like it in my life."

It was a small silver round locket and, on the inside, was another necklace that looked like it had a diamond on the end of it. It was breathtaking. Lyndia just stared at it.

"Lyndia, Lyndia, what's wrong? Do you know what it is?"

"Yes, but he will explain it to you. Come let us check and make sure you have everything you need."

I rested my hand on the necklace round my neck, sat down and cleared my head. I closed my eyes and concentrated on my love.

"Haldir thank you it's lovely."

"I'm happy you like it."

"Like it? I love it, it's beautiful and I will cherish it always."

I felt his smile surround me. "Oh how I love this elf".

For a brief moment I felt his lips on mine. It was like a tingling sensation and when I opened my eyes I was sitting alone on the balcony, Lyndia had just joined me and sat down.

"Shashuwan, everything is ready the question is, are you?" She said with a gentle smile.

"Yes, I am, I will be leaving soon and I need to spend all the time I can with him, I don't know if I am coming back or even if he wants me to, the two of us have a lot to work through today."

She smiled, "Yes, both of you need to talk. But please, listen with your heart and a clear mind. Promise me that you will do this?

"I promise I will do as you ask." There was a knock at the door, Lyndia answered it.

"Shashuwan, the guard says that Haldir is waiting for you."

"I am on my way." He left immediately.

I got up to leave and Lyndia stopped me, "Relax and enjoy, Shashuwan."

"I will try," I promised as I quickly hugged her good bye. "Thank you for everything."

I left my talan and went to the courtyard where Haldir was talking with Celeborn and his brother Orophin. His father saw me, but Haldir had his back to me. I was just about to speak when Orophin said, "Brother, she is here."

He turned and nothing needed to be said. He approached me took my hand and kissed it all so gently. Our eyes never loss contact until he kissed me gently at first but them with a bit more insistence. His full, soft lips caressing my own he didn't care who was there. It was all so magical. When he stopped kissing me, he gazed into my eyes. He didn't say anything; he just smiled. He took me by the hand and led me over to the horse and helped me up, then he mounted behind me.

Haldir said nothing till we were out of sight of the courtyard. "You took my breath away when I looked upon you, Shash."

"Did I? I wondered for a minute, but when you kissed me I knew you liked what you saw. I must say you look most delicious this afternoon yourself."

He smiled, "Delicious, I've never been called delicious."

"Well, that you are in more ways than one."

"I'm curious to find out in what ways you mean?"

I smiled at him. "You called my bluff didn't you?"

He laughed a very deep, warm laugh. "Of course I can not always let you have the upper hand, now can I?"

I just smiled not wanting to really give him an answer.

"Haldir, I know that you have other duties that you could be attending to instead of spending time with me but I wanted to say thank you. For all that you have done for me."

"You have nothing to thank me for my love there's no other place I would rather want to be."

"But you're the Marchwarden of Lothlorien. It would seem you would not have time for such romantic interludes."

He smiled at me, "What is that smile for? I'm serious."

"Do you think I am not capable of being romantic?"

"No, that is not what I meant. You always seem like you are on duty, always aware of what is going on around you."

"I can concentrate on many things at one time Shash, but when something or someone needs my total attention they have all of me, that I promise."

As we were riding, I was very warm from sitting this close to him. My senses were tingling and I felt alive. During our ride, he tightened his arm around my waist and pulled me closer. He gently kissed me under my right ear. I could not help myself and slowly laid my head back on his shoulder as he kissed the side of my neck.

He stopped the horse and held me closer. My breathing quickened and I leaned closer into him. Turning me to face him, he slowly made his way to my lips. He kissed me passionately, his tongue searching for mine. I slipped my arm around his waist and up his back. I caressed his face. Nothing compared to this moment for me, nothing. If I ever had any doubts, everything fell into place at that moment. I knew I was meant to be with him. He pulled back and placed little kisses on my face and smiled.

"If we keep this up we will never get there," he whispered, his voice husky and soft.

I looked at him and could not seem to focus on what he was saying. "Get where?"

He smiled and lightly kissed me again. "My private spot as you would call it."

"I'm sorry, I was thinking about something else."

Haldir nudged the horse and we resumed our journey on the path towards our destination. I laid my head on his chest while we were riding and for the first time in my life I was at peace with myself. I knew I had found my soul mate. Right before we arrived, he asked me to close my eyes. We rode a little longer then I felt the horse stop moving and Haldir dismounted.

"May I open my eyes?"

"No, just lean forward, I have you." I did as he asked me.

"Ok, now may I open my eyes, please?"

"No. Will you please stop asking and just wait?"

He took my right hand in his and his left arm went around my waist. We walked about 12 feet and stopped.

"Now you may open your eyes."

What I saw was breath taking. There was a white tent with two torches outside of the tent, also a beautiful table that was set for two and a lovely meal lay before us. We sat down to eat.

"Haldir, this is beautiful, when did you do all of this?"

"This morning as soon as I left you, I asked my brothers to help me."

As I sat my eyes got all misty and teary. I didn't know that Orophin had snuck away when my eyes were closed.

He looked across the table at me in total disagreement, "I will have no tears today my love, I bought you out here to bring you peace of mind, not tears." The soft expression on his face totally transformed him from the powerful Marchwarden and son of Galadriel, to the man...no elf that I had so quickly grown to love.

"It's just that no one has ever done anything like this for me. I can't believe that you did all this for me. Why?"

He stood and walked over to where I sat and knelt down next to me. He looked at me with those beautiful blue eyes. "Because I love you. I can not imagine my life without you in it."

All I could do is rap my arms around him and hold him. No one has ever said anything like that to me.

"Haldir, I love you also," I tearfully whispered in his shoulder.

"No more tears my love, no more. You will never hurt again, not as long as I'm here to protect you."

He wiped my tears away and hugged me again. I felt like the luckiest woman in both worlds. I kept thinking this must be a dream and if it is I don't ever want to wake up. He sat down opposite of me. He looked so strong, but gentle at the same time. I felt overly warm so I unfastened the brooch on my cloak and let it fall back on my chair. He did the same. He sat there just looking at me.

He started serving lunch, which smelled delicious and looked wonderful. "May I ask who cooked our lovely meal this afternoon?"

He smiled, "I did of course. Oro and Rumil helped me set up the tent and Oro watched over the meal till we arrived."

"You did? I'm impressed I had no idea that you could cook."

"There are many things that I can do that you do not know about, yet."

He sat down across from me and waited for me to try what he had made. The meat was very tender and the sauce looked wonderful. I cut a piece and tried it. To my surprise it was quite delicious.

"Haldir, this is fantastic!" Next I tried the salad and the warm bread and fresh butter. "Haldir, you have out done yourself. What is the name of this dish?" I asked as I continued to enjoy the meal.

"It does not have a name. I made it myself, no one showed me."

"Well, I must applaud the chef." I stood up and clapped.

He smiled and shook his head. "I have never met a woman like you Shash, but thank you. I am pleased that the meal is to your liking."

We enjoyed our lunch and lovely conversation. It was truly an afternoon to remember. He asked me many questions about my life

"Shash, tell me about yourself growing up?"

"Well my mother and father had different views of what I should learn. My mother wanted me to learn to sing and play the piano. Meanwhile, my father wanted me to be the best in horseback riding, archery and have not only a working knowledge of the woods, but an understanding."

He sipped his wine and put the glass down, "That is good which did you enjoy most?"

"I liked everything but I enjoyed my horseback riding lessons the most. I never told my mother that, but my father knew."

"So you enjoyed it from the beginning?" He leaned forward in his seat getting more interested in our conversation.

"Well I was like most children at the age of 6 I didn't want to do it at first, but the more I participated in my lessons the more I started to enjoy it. I entered competitions and horse shows. I enjoyed showing my skills as a rider and the confidence that I gained in myself helped me a lot in other areas of my life."

He arched his eyebrow and chuckled.

"And what was that little laugh for?" I asked.

"I was trying to imagine you lacking confidence."

"Well, lately I have not felt a lot of confidence in myself, but the more I open up to you the more I feel it coming back. We can't all be like you Haldir full of confidence and arrogance, can we?"

"No, you can't." And he didn't bat an eye when he said that.

"Where I come from, some call that being full of yourself or being a jerk."

He frowned. "I don't think I would appreciate being called a…jerk, Shash."

I laughed. "No, Haldir they would never call you that, it's just that is how some people would perceive you. But once they got to know you, they will see you as I do, almost."

His expression changed completely, he almost had that little elf look in his eyes. "Shash, exactly how do you see me?"

I was a little puzzled why he would ask me such a question. "Have you not asked the question before of others?

"Yes, but I wanted to hear what you would say, please?"

I sipped the last of my wine, leaned forward reached across the table and took his large hand in to mine. I softly caressed the side of his hand with my thumb.

"Haldir, I see you as someone who has the great responsibility being the Marchwarden of Lothlorien. You are very confident in yourself and you take great pride in what you do. I am sure your days can be very long and often your work takes you away from home. You are a strong elf. You are a protector, but you can be complicated sometimes. But before me right now, I see an elf who wants to be loved, who is tired of coming home to an empty talan, who would love to have his aching muscles soothed and the warmth of his love in bed beside him. Although you hide your hurt and your pain, I can feel it. I can see it in your eyes. But I love you and I would never turn your love away."

He smiled sitting back in his chair, "You see much, my love"

"But I would never tell anyone the depth of what I see and feel. That is for only us to know."

"Thank you, Shash." He filled his glass with wine and drank it a little longer than usual. "Shashuwan, there is something that I need to ask you, I am not sure how you would respond but I have to ask."

He led me over to the lake and laid a blanket on a boulder where he had me sit, "The necklace that you are wearing, Lyndia gave it to me when her sons passed away." She said, 'That I should give it to the woman that I love and want to spend the rest of my life with and have my little ones.'

I sat there in shock, I could not believe what he was about to ask me, he knelt in front of me and gently grasped my hands in to his own and softly kissing them, then bowed his touching my hands.

"My love what is wrong?" He looked up at me and the softest look in his eyes.

"I know you may be thinking that we have not known each other long to be asking this but, will you marry me? I will love you for an eternity. All I ask is for you to be my wife."

I looked at him in total disbelief, "Me? You are asking me? Haldir are you sure, I mean…I don't know what to say?"

He did not move, "I know that you have been through a lot since yesterday and I was not sure if it was the right time but like you said, you will be leaving soon and I had to ask you."

"I…I… would normally need more time to think…"

"Hmm, so you need more time to think about it?" He dropped my hands, immediately got up and walked over towards the lake.

"Haldir, no that is…."

"No let me finish, please." I sat there not saying a word. He stood and was looking out over the lake with his hands behind his back. He looked so sexy and vulnerable at the same time.

"Shash, I know that asking you to be my wife is a big decision for you and it would mean a lot of changes for you. You are wondering if you would have to leave your work and everyone you love," he rushed on in his explanation. "I want you to know that if you decided not to stay that I will understand and that I love you enough to let you go. I do not want to but I would never force you to stay. However, I want you to know I would leave Lothlorien to be with you…"

"Haldir, will you please listen to what I have to say?"

He hesitated for a minute looking over his should at me, he gave that look as if to say 'please don't hurt me,' "All right, what do you have to say?"

I got up, walked over and stood before him taking his hands in mine. There was a slight breeze in the afternoon air and the light of Lothlorien filtered through the trees and made lovely diamonds that cascaded upon the water.

"Haldir, you are correct in saying that a decision of this magnitude requires a lot of me. Leaving everything that I have worked for and yes leaving everyone that I love and hold so dear. But, you have not said one thing about what I would gain being here with you. Haldir, I want to be your wife. I want to have all the little elflings that you want! I cannot bear the thought of being apart from you." I told him with determination and conviction.

"So if you'll still have me, it would bring me great joy to be your wife."

Without saying a word he pulled me in his arms and held me. "You have made me so happy, Shashuwan Shane."

"No Haldir, it is you who have made me happier than you will ever know for letting me in your life."

We stood there and just held each other for the longest time. It felt so delightful being held in his arms. I was content just standing there while we held each other; I laid my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat.

He was gently stroking my face, "My, wife."

"Yes, my husband?"

"Come sit next to me."

We returned to where we were sat before and pulled my chair close to him. He removed the necklace from around my neck. He opened the little locket and removed a necklace that was more beautiful than the first. It was a beautiful stone that was clear and when he put it on me and it lay on my chest it sparkled. I was amazed by it.

"Haldir, it's beautiful, no one has ever given me anything so magnificent."

He sat back in his chair, "My wife come sit with me."

I sat on his lap leaned in to him and started kissing his neck, he gave into me resting his head on the back of the chair. I slowly made my way to his left ear kissing and lightly kissing him. He let out a deep soft moan of pleasure not wanting me to stop.

"We have to return to inform the Lord and Lady."

I stopped and he looked at him, "Why now, why not tomorrow Haldir?"

He had called for his horse, stood up lifting me with him and gently sat me on the horse and mounted behind me.

"Shash you leave in two days we have to have the betrothing ceremony tomorrow."

We rode with the great speed back to the court yard where his brother Rumil was chatting with other elves. "Brother, you are back soon did she get bored with you?" Jokingly he said.

He helped me down off the horse and led me by the hand looking back he said "No, just follow me, where is ORO?"

Rumil replied, "He is in the study with Nana and Ada why?" Haldir, myself and Oro rushed pass the guards up the stairs to the study.

"Nana, Ada? I have great news for you." Haldir said with growing excitement in his voice.

They were both a little taken back by their Marchwarden's emotional state. A look of concern passed over their faces.

"What is wrong my son, please tell us now!" Lady Galadriel, Lord Celeborn, Oro and Rumil were all waiting.

We both stood there with the biggest smiles on our face and eyes sparkled. "Shashuwan has accepted my proposal to be my wife!" Haldir explained.

Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn came right over and congratulated us with warm hugs and laughter.

Lady Galadriel tentatively approached me. I had not seen her since yesterday when she devastated my life, "Haldir, would you mind if I talked with Shashuwan?"

I thought the request to Haldir was a little strange, "Why not just ask me Lady Galadriel?"

She smiled, "You have agreed to be my sons' wife, I have to give him that respect now and you."

Haldir came to my side, "Nana, I do not want her upset at all. Do you understand?"

She nodded, "I do my son."

We went to the balcony so we could talk, "Lady Shashuwan, First let me say I am happy that you will be my daughter and I want to welcome you to my family. Second I want to tell you that it was never my intention to hurt you in anyway, I thought that your father would have told you something about him, his family. I honestly believed t you knew something of his life but I was wrong."

"Even I can make mistakes and I am sorry that you found out the way you did. My knowledge of things is vast and I try to be considerate of everyone's feelings that is when I can read their thoughts. You have the ability to hide your deepest thoughts from me and it troubled me that you did this. I only hope that you will open your thoughts to me so we can grow closer and forgive me."

I stood there looking at her not sure of what to say but I knew what my husband-to-be would have wanted, "I accept your apology, Lady Galadriel. Did Haldir talk to you about it?"

She closed her eyes for a minute then looked at me, "He was more than upset with me. I have never seen him so upset before. I told him the same thing that I told you, but he was not receptive to it. At that point I knew how much he loved you and would go to great lengths to protect you and defend you against anyone. I give you my blessing to marry."

I wasted no time giving her a hug, "I am happy the two of you are close again." Haldir said as he walked on to the balcony, followed by his brothers and Lord Celeborn.

Rumil placed his arm around my shoulder, "Well little sister, Orophin and I can not believe that you said yes to him!" he said with a wink. Are you sure you want to do this?"

I looked at them in a slight surprise, "You should not joke like that Rumil about your brother! I admonished with a grin. "I am even happier to have the two of you for my brothers." They both smiled and gave me big hugs.

Lady Galadriel spoke up, "Orophin and Rumil, I need to speak with Haldir and Shashuwan so please excuse us." They both bowed and left immediately.

We all sat at the table in her study, "Shashuwan and Haldir, I am very happy that the two of you have decided to be wed. There are a few things that would be helpful for you to know, dear." Shashuwan, here in Lothlorien our tradition is that a couple has a betrothal ceremony."

"Lady Galadriel, both you and Haldir about a betrothal ceremony, please explain?"

"You would stand before our priest, you have vows to repeat and each of you will be given silver rings. This ceremony is an engagement where in your case you will vow to return in six months' time. Upon your return, we will have your wedding ceremony. At that time, you will commit to each other. This commitment is a lifelong bonding that extends beyond death. But you will not be allowed to physically bond until after your wedding. Do you both understand what I have said?"

"Yes, Lady Galadriel, I understand I would have to return home without my love and I must be away from him for a full six months." While I understood that the waiting was part of their customs, I felt physically ill at the thought of being away from Haldir for so long. I looked at him, and the mere thought of being separated for so long felt like a knife was jabbed through my heart; I knew he could feel it and I did not care.

I heard his voice in my head, "My love we will talk when we are alone. I know you are strong, Shash. We can do this!"

With that said, I turned to Lady Galadriel, "So when will we have our ceremony?"

"Your betrothing ceremony will be tomorrow at noon, Lyndia will be there to translate for you and tell you of other details.

"Thank you, Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn for everything."

Haldir said goodbye for both of us. We left the study together; I was very quiet when we left his parents even on the ride back. When we arrived I still said nothing. I just went and sat on the boulder where I had been before.

"Shashuwan, I can feel how upset you are. Please, talk to me!."

"Haldir, I am sorry my feelings are completely in turmoil. On one hand, I am delighted about the ceremony tomorrow. Anything that brings you and I closer together makes me happy. But, it's just that I had hoped that you would go back with me, I don't want to be anywhere without you but if I have to I will."

"My love, I feel the same way. I have this uneasiness about you going back alone."

I smiled, "My love I will be fine, I promise." I needed to convince both Haldir and myself of that fact.

I got up and walked over to the lake to look at its beauty, believe me when I say it was just breathtaking. Haldir walked over towards me and slipped his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

"Shash, may I ask you something?"

"Of course my love anything, just ask."

"May I see your back?"

Every muscle in my body tensed up and I turned to look up at him, "Why Haldir? Why would you want to see that...ugliness? I try not to even look at them myself."

"I want to see them I want to see what he did to you? Please let me!"

"Haldir you have to understand that this is something I show no one, it's ugly and I hate it...them… the horrible reminder of what he did to me. But you are right; you should see them."

I stepped back and took off my cloak turned around so he could undo my gown in the back. He carefully started unlacing my gown which was made me feel very nervous and uneasy. I know he could feel everything that was going on inside of me! There was no more hiding any part of myself. He stopped and just held me gently in his arms.

He tried to reassure me saying, "Shash, I am not him. You know I would never hurt you. It is my place to protect you, but if you want me to stop I will."

Feeling his arms around me and hearing his voice made me relax. "My love, please continue."

He continued unlacing my gown till he saw the scars, I felt him tense up and then I felt such a hatred raised up in him that it scared me. He softly laid his large hand on my scars that crisscrossed my back, "I don't understand how he could do this to you! He is not a man but an animal, nothing more and I will make sure he pays for each one of these marks to your precious skin," he said, as the tips of his fingers ghosted across my back.

Holding my gown up in front of me, I turned around and looked up at him, "Haldir, I hope that this will be resolved before you get there. They frown on murder in my country too," I said, trying to interject a little lightness into a horrible situation. And it felt so strange, because in the passage of a moment, I went from feeling tenderly loved, to being ashamed. I was marked with hideous scars. Who would ever love someone like me?

"I did not mean to make you upset my love," I added, now in a fearful timid voice.

His tender voice soothed my bruised ego and body. "You did nothing wrong my love, my anger is directed at him and him alone. Believe me, he will never touch you again, this I swear. My love, "he murmured as he caressed me, up and down my arms" you are still beautiful to me and you always will be."

He started to lace up my gown but not before he gently placed little kisses up the middle of my back which made me very weak. My nerves, emotions and hormones made me feel like I was on a Merry-Go-Round inside. "Haldir…please…please stop we can't."

He kissed me on the back of my neck and let out a soft deep moan, "I know, forgive my actions, my love. Please be aware of how desirable you are to me, now and always."

He laced up the back of my gown and held me very tight, "Haldir, can we just sit for a while?" I practically begged, trying to get a grip on myself.

"Are you feeling ill, Shash?"

"No, my love just still tired from yesterday and it is not every day that a mortal woman, well half mortal, meets her soul mate all in two weeks and betrothed to him." I shook my head in mock disbelief. "It's a lot to take in, but I have no regrets at all, I have never been more 100% about anything in my life, I love you and that will never change."

He looked at me and smiled, "So you are 100%, no regrets. Are you sure that you can handle my arrogance, my moods? I can be very moody at times. If you listen to my brothers they would say I am moody all the time."

"Hmm, all the time, Haldir? Well, you might be a bit surprised to learn that I have often been accused of being moody myself!"

We sat down on the boulder together, "Shash, I can't believe that you are moody?"

"Well, yes I am matter of fact to hear Katara tell it when I am absorbed in my work, I am moody and I don't like to be disturbed,."

He chuckled, "I would be the judge of that my love."

He started to get up and staggered slightly, "Haldir, what is wrong!"

"I….I am not sure, just feeling a little," He stammered ever so slightly as he turned away from me,"… nothing is wrong my love, I will be fine." He straightened and pronounced with a nonsense tone of voice, "rain is coming. We must bring the dishes in and I need to secure the tent."

Even though he was about already trying to be about his business, I help on to his arm, felt his forehead as I checked for a fever but there was none, "You have done too much my love, you should rest, I can bring them in, ok?"

He smiled, "We will do this together, as we will do things now and always."

Together we moved what we could into the tent. When I entered the tent it was as beautiful as the outside. To the left was a low table that we set our things on with a couple candles and to the right was a couch/bed that sat low to the ground, with throw blankets, many pillows on it and beautiful white fur blanket. He bought the last of our things in I started to go back out but he stopped me.

"Shash that was the last, I will be right back I am just checking to make sure the tent is secure."

He left the tent quickly, I poured wine for both of us and then I heard the rain, I worried because he seemed tired, I stood there waiting for him, he returned wet and a little chilled.

"The tent is fine. Are you alright?"

"Yes, now that you have returned. Before anything else is done, you must get out of those wet clothes."

He started to get undress, I felt a shiver pass through his body and I didn't even have to see it. I knew he was tired and had done too much. I removed a blanket from the bed and went to his side where he sat and placed the blanket around his shoulders. I knelt beside him, "My love can I get you anything?"

He said very little, "May I have some wine please?"

I immediately got his wine and handed it to him; he took a couple sips then finished his glass and returned it to me. I pulled the blankets back on the bed, "Haldir come to bed and let me warm you, please?"

He looked up at me and arched an eyebrow, "Warm me?"

"I cannot have you getting sick, I need you to be well and strong when we say our vows tomorrow afternoon."

"True, but what I need is to be close to you," I stood there listening to the storm and chill went through me and for a minute I felt as I did when I was alone in the hollowed out tree in the woods. All of the past hurt and pain came flooding back and I forgot where I was, "Shashuwan, Shashuwan?" I did not hear my love call my name but when I felt his arms around me I came back.

"Shashuwan, what is wrong?"

I stood there trying to figure out what happened, "Haldir, I … I thought I was back in the woods experiencing all that had happened yesterday again."

He was so worried about me, "Shash, it is just the storm nothing more my love."

"Just a storm, but it feels just like it did yesterday."

"No, you are here are with me now. Nothing shall harm you not like before."

I looked up at him and I knew what he said was true, "I believe you."

I changed in to my night gown and he got in bed and pulled the blanket up around him, "Shash, I thought you were going to warm me?" He said with a twinkle in his eye and a smirk on his lips.

I pulled back the blankets and slid in bed and lain in my elf's arms. We cuddled and fooled around. I teased him with temping temptations. I have to admit that I can't wait to have his warm body joined to mine, in love. As we played things started to get out of hand a little, I was teasing him and he playfully pinned me to the bed like before. I slowly gyrated beneath him and he pushed himself against me so I could feel him, my gown was in the way he reached back and placed his left hand on my bare knee and slowly pushed my gown up to my waist so we could feel the pleasure of each other. He slowly kissed my neck and down my cleavage, I gave in to my love and begged him to kiss me and he did, I slowly stroked his back wanting him to enter me but we both stopped at the same time and groaned with no small bit of frustration. Breathing heavily Haldir apologized, "Shash… I am sorry, I lost myself, I should not have let it get this far."

I reached up and tucked his hair behind his beautiful ears, "My love, no need to be sorry. We were both at fault but it was certainly beautiful and I can't wait for our wedding night."

He looked down at me and kissed my lips, "And I can't wait to have you, my love."

He slowly got up and kissed the inner part of my thigh sending a chill up my spine, giving me a scorching, "I desire you look". The storm had stopped and we just laid there breathing deeply and listening to the sounds after the rain and we both went to sleep.

I awoke to the sweet sounds of the night, I put my slippers and robe on to step outside for a little while and I thought Haldir was resting. When I last looked his eyes had that sort of glazed over look.

"Shash, where are you going?"

"Haldir, I thought you were sleep I didn't mean to disturb you, I just wanted to watch the sun set."

He sat up in bed, "May I join you?"

I smiled, "Of course, I will be outside waiting for you."

I went outside and it was beautiful, the grass looked as if it were glistening under the moonlight. My love slipped his arms around my waist and I relaxed against him. We stood there and watched the moon together.

"Haldir, do you think we could always end our days like this, just the two of us gazing at the moon or watching the sunset together?"

"If you wish then it shall be."

We stood there together gazing at the moon and I enjoying the warmth of my elf, my love, my Haldir.