Bruce did not have a good night, his mind kept spiralling, unsure what to think. He knew Loki as his enemy- the man who wished to enslave mankind, but couldn't forget the fondness that Thor spoke of his brother with, and agonizingly went over every moment of interaction he'd had with the trickster. He awoke Monday morning not wanting to go into the lab, but feeling he'd taken enough of a risk by taking the weekend off.
When he stumbled into the lab, a bit later than he'd meant to, he found Tony already there. His teammate glanced over and ended up staring, his brows furrowed. Before Tony could say anything, though, the speaker in the lab went off alerting them that the Avengers were being called to Assemble. At the mention that it was an attack by Loki, Bruce felt an uncomfortable panic.
"You're staying," Tony told him firmly, as soon as the message ended. Bruce opened his mouth to protest, but Tony had grabbed a syringe, "No- you're in no condition to be fighting or turning into the jolly green giant- if you try to come, I'll sedate you."
"Why do you even have that?" Bruce asked nervously, although that was a ridiculous question. Of course Tony had something on hand to stop Bruce in case he was about to Hulk out. It did put Tony's attempts to push him over the edge in an annoying other light.
Tony shook his head, grabbing the Mark V suit, "Pepper likes keeping them on hand to threaten me with sleep." He hastened to the door and then paused, "Go back to your room and rest, that's an order, I'll tell Cap that you're too sick to go, he'll support me."
It was not hard to find a news station doing live coverage of the fight, the harder part was deciding which one was best, and so Bruce sat in his room, sipping the tea Loki had given him and tried to ignore the fear growing in his stomach.
Gradually he was coming to realize that he didn't know what would happen if he was to fight against Loki now- someone who'd shown him kindness without being required to by a government organization. In the back of his mind, where the Hulk always lurked and he could tell what his alter ego was feeling if he really had to, he knew that the Hulk only ever wanted to be alone. Hulk got on better with their teammates, who seemed better able to trust the monster than the coiled potential in scrawny Bruce Banner, was glad to be doing good, but ultimately wanted to be alone.
Watching the footage of the fight, there was some desire to protect his teammates. Bruce could feel the Hulk raging at him, seething at Bruce's weakness, when Iron Man barely saved Hawkeye from a fall that usually the Hulk would easily have caught him from. But through most of the fight, especially when the camera caught a glimpse of Loki, the Hulk just felt the desire to run away.
It was a familiar one, the first feeling that the Hulk had ever really felt after getting over the shock of being ripped into existence from a small, weak body. He had never wanted this, people shooting at him and being chased like a rabid beast. Hulk had only gone along with being one of the Avengers after the promise of being let free often, to no longer be hunted by the government and to have a chance to genuinely help people- maybe even be a hero. Bruce still remembers Fury unflinchingly facing the giant monster and negotiating terms as best as they could. They had to be alone, or at least convince the Hulk and Bruce that there were no snipers around to take them down, and no armor could protect a human from Hulk's might. Fury had been the only person besides Betty to be willing to do this, and was the only thing that convinced them both to stay and help.
Lonely, tense months where the only times they could find to let Hulk loose were in fights, however, had bred plenty of doubts. And now they were questioning if their enemy was truly evil, if they deserved or even wanted to be heroes.
It was entirely possible, Bruce thought, that the next time they went to fight Loki, the Hulk would simply turn and run to the nearest forest or cave instead of fight. At best, SHIELD would track them down and Bruce would be in lock down until they regained trust. At worst, SHIELD would give them over to the army and General Ross. That was a terrifying thought.
He sat, glued to the coverage flashing on his laptop and quietly nursing the tea that was not nearly strong enough to counter the growing anxieties. There was no good way to turn- if he refused to fight with the Avengers, his position at SHIELD would be at risk. There was no convincing argument for why he couldn't fight but was still safe enough to help in the lab. If he fought, there was the risk that Hulk would run- putting them both in danger, and the thought of being on the run from the government, again, was less than appealing. He doubted he would get as nice a welcome next time. And seeing as last time he was tricked somewhere and surrounded by at least 100 men with guns, that wasn't a very pleasant thought.
Bruce curled up in a blanket, watching as the fight ended, just wanting to be left alone and wondering what was going to happen.
"I think this is the first time none of us had to go to medbay after a mission," Clint mused once they were all in the debriefing room. A few of them would be making a trip there, himself included, afterwards to clean up a few wounds, but there was nothing severe enough to justify missing this meeting.
The rest of the team looked rather somber at that point, taking it just as a reminder of
"Are you sure Bruce isn't?" Steve pointed out, "If he's that sick, he probably should be seeing a doctor."
"I doubt he went, I told him to go back to his room to get rest- it's probably just a bug," Tony said with a shrug. Even if it was a bit more serious, he imagined that Bruce would prefer to suffer through it than get treated by SHIELD's medical personel. Given his own avoidance of doctors, Tony could hardly blame him for that. Actually, no one in the Avengers seemed terribly fond of doctors. Clint still wasn't quite used to having such ready access to advanced medical care, Thor didn't trust "mortal" doctors, Natasha didn't say one way or another and Steve still got nervous when he had to get a shot.
"Someone should check up on him," Natasha pointed out, glancing at Tony.
Tony raised his eyebrow, "Why look at me when you say that? You really think I'm the right choice to take care of someone who's sick?"
"None of us are, but you know him best," she replied.
"I will tend to him," Thor said, earning a surprised glance from pretty much the entire team. "I remember enough from when my mother tended me the few times I was ill, I should be able to. Is it customary for mortals to drink soup while ill as well?"
"Yeah, chicken noodle's a favorite," Tony said, running a hand through his hair as his brain tried to process this thought.
"It would be safest for Thor to do this," Clint suggested quietly. Tony shot him a dirty look and the others shifted uncomfortably, thinking the same thing.
"We'll get the soup delivered, though, no offense big guy- but I don't trust you to try cooking after that time you tried building a fire pit for spit-roasting in my kitchen," Tony pointed out. The bigger problem wasn't the hole in his kitchen floor that went ot the lab, but the broken pipe and damaged wires. Still in his suit, JARVIS had already pulled up the information for the best and closest resturaunt to order from.
Thor chuckled at the memory, nodding, "That is probably for the best."
Tony waited at the doorway to SHIELD for the food to arrive, an order which had ended up including more than the largest container of soup they had on hand but also food for everyone else. The others found themselves sitting around the living room the Avengers shared, waiting for word from Thor about how Bruce was doing. This mostly involved Clint attempting to make jokes about what Bruce must be like sick, which Steve would quickly cut down as being insensitive while Natasha gave a sympathetic smile. She knew it was just how he dealt with things, that he didn't mean anything by it.
When Thor walked into Bruce's room, the jolt of surprise was almost enough to cause him to Hulk out. He was still watching news on his computer, now watching the aftermath, SHIELD always sent people to handle PR and, of course, they got as manyinterviews with victims as possible. People were also speculating on why the Hulk had been absent, something that had been hard to ignore. SHIELD's people refused to comment much on it, but they'd somehow managed to get General Ross to do an interview stating that it was clear the Hulk was more than they could control. The media was having a field day speculating and fear mongering, they never were comfortable with the Hulk as a hero.
After watching this, his nerves already thinned, he half-expected someone to come in and tell him that they wouldn't be needing him as an Avenger anymore and escort him to the "Hulk tank" they'd made. So when Thor walked in unnanounced, he nearly lept out of his skin, slamming the laptop screen down automatically.
"Oh, Thor," that actually did nothing to assuage his fears, the demigod was the only one on the team who could control the Hulk without getting badly hurt. He gripped the blanket around him a bit tighter and tried to smile, "What brings you here?"
"Tony informed us that you were ill," he said, feeling a bit guilty about scaring Bruce so. He hadn't wanted to knock in case Bruce were sleeping, but clearly walking in like that was the wrong thing to do. Thor smiled warmly at him, "I wanted to see if you needed anything. Tony has ordered you soup, I believe that chicken noodle is traditional when sick."
"Oh," he said blankly, staring at Thor for a few moments. He suddenly felt very, very silly and a bit guilty for thinking that Thor had been there to lock him up. Bruce relaxed into his blankets and leaned back against the headboard, biting his lip. "Thank you, but I don't think I'm really sick. It's just stress."
Thor frowned at that, looking him over, "You don't look very well." Getting sick from stress was not a common problem in Asgard.
Bruce chuckled slightly, "Thanks. You're right though, I've been feeling terrible over this. I'm sorry to have worried you."
"What troubles you to make you this ill?" he asked, sitting down on the bed and looking over Bruce.
In that moment, Bruce realized that Thor was likely the only Avenger that he could talk to about this. And also the last one he wanted to, Loki was causing Thor enough heartache without adding this to it.
"I'm... I don't know if I should tell you," he offered instead, looking down. Thor leaned over and placed a hand on his shoulder, more gently than Bruce thought such a strong man could manage, but didn't press him. Bruce glanced up at him for a moment before biting his lip again, "It's about your brother, and I don't want to upset you."
The hand on his shoulder and Thor's jaw tensed at that, but he forced himself to relax, the effort involved in doing so visible on his face. Again he offered just the gentle smile, "I do appreciate your concern, but if this is my brother's doing then I need to know. I will do what I can to help. Did he approach you as he did Clint?"
"Not... not exactly." Bruce shifted nervously, "He well, he stole my tea and when I went to the store to buy more he started talking to me." It sounded ridiculous when he said it. "Then I met with him again the other day." He smiled awkwardly at Thor, "He made me tea."
Thor stared at him for a moment, then placed a hand to his forehead. It did not feel warm, although he was not sure if it worked the same for mortals. "Perhaps I should call the others, they would know how to tell if you're feverish."
"I'm not," he said, gently pushing the hand away, "I don't know if it's a plot, or if he's being sincere, but I actually liked talking to him."
"He can be a wonderful conversational companion," Thor agreed, "But even I can no longer tell when he is manipulating you with his words and when he is speaking from his heart." He sighed and glanced at the wall, "I sometimes wonder if he knows the difference anymore."
"Sometimes, when I said something that surprised him, I thought that I could trust what he said," Bruce said quietly, "Sometimes I'd say things that I hadn't meant to tell anyone, even though I know he's the last person I should be talking to."
"He may be turning you against us, you are a very powerful ally," Thor said gently, looking up at Bruce almost pleadingly.
Bruce looked down, "He didn't have much work to be able to. I don't trust SHIELD, when you walked in I honestly thought they'd sent someone to lock me up for missing a mission."
"They will have to go through the Avengers if they wish to," Thor said firmly. Bruce glanced up at him nervously. "I know that Tony and I have more loyalty to our team than we ever will to SHIELD, and I believe the others do as well. If anyone wishes to lock you up, unless you truly deserve it, they shall feel the wrath of Thor."
"Thank you," he said quietly, smiling as he felt a burden lift from his chest. He knew that he would still worry about it, but having someone say it without any real prompting was a great relief.
Before Thor got a chance to say anything, the door opened again and Bruce wondered if he should get better at locking it. Tony walked in, still in his Iron Man suit, just with his helmet off. He grinned at Bruce, "You should've seen the look on the delivery guy's face when he saw me in this."
"You stayed in the suit just for that?" he asked, rolling his eyes but smiling.
"Why not?" Tony held up a take-out bowl of soup, "The rest of the team is still sitting on the couch waiting to hear how you are- they might pile in here soon if you don't come out. Might be better to eat this out there."
Bruce smiled and laughed slightly, shifting to stand up while keeping the blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He took the bowl from Tony's hand and poked his head out too look at the common area.
