I need to put a warning for every chapter that has smut. Written by my beautiful Gina *less than three*
So, smut at the end of this.
A bit.
Blaine hadn't slept on the surface in years. He was always super sensitive when he did, his human half liked him acting like it, like a real human. But he could just flame down to Underworld in the middle of the night and leave Kurt alone. He couldn't yes. He would. But he literally couldn't.
He couldn't sleep either.
So he just watched. He watched Kurt sleep. Kurt was so peaceful. Every once in a while he would make a little content sigh and nuzzle his head even deeper into the crook of Blaine's neck. Yes Kurt was peaceful. And clueless. He was so happy not knowing he was in the devil's arms. Those arms that were so gentle to him the night before are the same ones that will...The same ones that...
Blaine couldn't even finish that. How am I gonna kill you? he thought. What have you ever done wrong ? To me? Or to anyone?
He kept replaying last night in his head.
Kurt's tears.
Kurt's vulnerability.
Kurt's despair.
Kurt's sobs.
Kurt's trust.
Kurt's lips on his.
Kurt's eagerness.
And more than anything, love in Kurt's eyes.
There was just so much love in those eyes that Blaine couldn't believe it was all for him. Or any of it for that matter.
With every passing moment Blaine could see his resolve crumbling. How the fuck was he going do this? Where will he find the will to strike? To end the life that was intertwining itself around him tighter and tighter by the minute?
A few weeks ago Blaine was fine. He was having issues with the damn dreams but that was it. Dreams he could handle. Dreams were just that. Dreams. Something far and distant. But this? This "thing" lying in his arms was real. Kurt was real. And so warm. And he had those damn long eyelashes that were casting shadows on his cheeks.
If he thought dreams were bad, that dreams were torture. He'd take dreams over this any day now. Take it and be happy about it. Cause what he felt right now was...Agony. Kurt giving all of him to Blaine was more than he could take. And he wanted to take everything. Make it all his.
He didn't recognize the feeling at first. It was so strange for him. So distant and yet he finally placed it.
Possessive.
Blaine was possessive of Kurt.
Kurt was beautiful. Sweet. Innocent. At moments so adorable that Blaine could hardly stand it. And he liked Kurt. No doubt about it. He wasn't a fool. He couldn't deny the obvious. But Blaine found himself seeing more than that.
He wanted Kurt to be his. Only his. A piece of heaven made just for him. Something pure and shiny for him to hold. Something that was the exact opposite of him.
The other half of the whole.
Yes, to human eyes Blaine's human face was beautiful. Fools. There was nothing beautiful about him. Evil. Rotten. Spoiled. He was like Dorian Gray. Shiny and glorious on the outside and on the inside...It was like his demonic side was the REAL him...His demonic side was the image of sin, vice and ungodliness. It reflected all the people he killed, all the lives he ruined. It seemed that his apparently beautiful face mocked him because he knew just how horrific the REAL him was.
And Kurt looked at him like..Like Blaine didn't even have that "other side" Like he saw only the best in Blaine. And only next to Kurt he felt like maybe, just maybe that is the real him. It was hard to explain what he felt about his human side. He both loved it and loathed it. He loved that part of him that he got from his mother. The only person other than Drake he ever loved. She taught him how to love. To feel. To make the right decisions at the right time. To BE rightful. His humanity was a part of her he always carried with him. But his humanity also was his weakness. It was part of him that made him work harder than others to prove himself. Humans were weak by nature. And he had to prove that he was more than just his human half. It was also the part that made him yearn. Yearn for simple things he could never have. Things like...Things like Kurt.
He wanted the way Kurt looked at him. He wanted that loving gaze that seemed to burn right through his soul. If he even had one. They say that only if you have a soul you can get into the Wasteland. So he had hopes. And with Kurt looking at him the way he did tonight...Could he allow himself to hope?
So he just kept staring at Kurt. At his angel. And his curse.
The morning light broke through the windows and Blaine looked in awe at Kurt. He was even more adorable now, scrunching his nose and closing his eyelids tightly as if the sun would scorch him.
Sun wont but I'll have to..Blaine thought.
Kurt opened one of his eyes and smiled at Blaine. Kurt could feel his heart swelling in his chest. Happy. He was so happy. The feeling of waking up in Blaine's arms was a feeling like no other. Kurt wanted nothing more than to wake up to those hazel eyes every day for the rest of his life. He sighed happily and smiled.
Damn, I so don't want to kill you...Blaine thought
"Good morning" Kurt said with a yawn. Despite himself Blaine smiled at him "You spend too much time with Wyatt, you two are starting to look awfully alike"
Kurt opened his eyes and said "Oh you mean we're both unbelievably adorable"
Blaine smiled again. It was like his face was frozen in that position whenever he was with Kurt. "No, you're both small and annoying"
Kurt acted offended, "There is nothing small about me shorty" Kurt said.
"Oh don't I know it" Blaine teased just to see that adorable color when Kurt blushed.
Oh yes, this was becoming a problem Blaine thought.
"Do you mind if I take a shower? I have to go home, Piper needs to change my diaper and powder my ass." He said rolling his eyes .
"Ok eww that was an image I didn't need."
Kurt placed a hand over his heart and acted wounded "Did you just make "eww" noises at the mention of my ass?"
It was Blaine's turn to roll his eyes at Kurt "Oh yes, your ass is just...Awfull, simply awfull" he said angling himself to checkout Kurt's ass one more time.
"Stop staring at my ass" Kurt laughed out but then leaned in to kiss Blaine. He simply melted into the kiss, like he always did. So damn willing and responsive.
"Ok, as much as I wanna keep doing this, oh I don't know, for like forever, I have to go home" Kurt said. "
"I'll put on some music while I'm in the shower, is that ok? Force of habit." Kurt asked shyly
"Kurt, just act like you live here, ok?" Blaine said and then realized what he just said. "I mean, just feel like at home"
Oh that's much better asshole, he thought to himself.
Kurt beamed at him and Blaine had to swallow the lump in his throat. For the briefest second he had a clear picture of this happening every day. Falling asleep and waking up next to Kurt, having those love filed eyes on his at all times. Yes, and then I go to rule the underworld and kill people he runs off to save the world with his Charmed sisters. Oh yes, that's the stuff fairytales are made off.
God, what the hell is wrong with me? Blaine thought.
Kurt hit the stereo and picked a random station. He then picked his clothes from the floor and went to the bathroom giving Blaine one last smile.
There's a place that I know
It's not pretty there and few have ever gone
If I show it to you now
Will it make you run away
Or will you stay
Even if it hurts
Even if I try to push you out
Will you return?
And remind me who I really am
Please remind me who I really am
What the fuck?! Was this some kind of cosmic joke?
He could hear Kurt singing from the bathroom.
Everybody's got a dark side
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody's a picture perfect
But we're worth it
You know that we're worth it
Will you love me?
Even with my dark side?
Blaine groaned and fell face first into the pillow. Bloody hell, he did not need this right now. For every word to be spot on. It was like the whole world was mocking him. "Nobody's a picture perfect But we're worth it." Great! Just what I needed. Sure, heat up my hopes.
Hopes?! Did he just say hopes?!
Hopes for what?! He needs to gets his shit together!
Like a diamond
From black dust
It's hard to know
It can become
A few give up
So don't give up on me
Please remind me who I really am
What in the bloody hell is this?
Blaine wasn't black dust meant to become shiny diamond. He could never be shiny again, if he ever was, which he doubted. And would Kurt love him even with his dark side? If that dark side was so strong that it consumed most of him?
He knew the answer even before he finished asking the question.
No.
Kurt was good, in every way possible. Maybe he was gullible and easy to be fool but if he knew the truth...Blaine knew he wouldn't hesitate to run away from him screaming. One look at his demonic side would probably be enough to make the loving look in Kurt's eyes turn to disgust. He wasn't sure he could bear to see that. So he'll have to kill Kurt before thing go too far. Just...How the hell was he going to find the will to extinguish that gleaming light in Kurt's eyes and live with himself?
The damned song was still blasting from the stereo.
Everybody's got a dark side
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody's a picture perfect
But we're worth it
You know that we're worth it
Will you love me?
Even with my dark side?
He wished they had met under different circumstances. Would that change anything? Blaine would still be the Source and Kurt would still be the Charmed One's brother. A force made to protect good. And Blaine would still be the force made to destroy it.
Don't run away
Don't run away
Just tell me that you will stay
Promise me you will stay
Don't run away
Don't run away
Just promise me you will stay
Promise me you will stay
At the same time he wanted to tell Kurt to run away, to save himself and he wanted him to stay, here, with him forever. If Kurt ran...maybe this wouldn't seem so hideous. Maybe he'd have a chance. Blaine groaned at his own cruelty.
I want him to run only so I can hunt my prey...
And like he had a chance against Blaine. It would take all three Charmed One's to take him down and even then he would put up a damn good fight.
Will you love me? ohh
Everybody's got a dark side
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody's a picture perfect
But we're worth it
You know that we're worth it
Will you love me?
Even with my dark side?
Maybe he could fool Kurt, maybe even make him love him with the dark side he hides so well from him but Blaine knew Kurt could never love anyone who hurt his family. And Blaine planned on killing them all. Sure, he cared about Kurt, in some sick, twisted way he felt like Kurt belonged to him, but he felt nothing for the sisters. Actually, that was a lie. He hated Piper, that bitch was a menace. Plus, it annoyed the hell out of him that he was still not in her good graces. He needed all three sisters to trust him if he was gonna get the book. And so far she was making it impossible for him to even get close.
She had to go. And with her...With her that look in Kurt's eyes will go too...And then nothing will matter anymore.
Kurt stepped out of the bathroom still wearing his own clothes. "You could have borrowed something of mine, you didn't have to wear that again." Blaine said. Somehow the image of Kurt in his clothes was making the monster inside him roar with pleasure.
Kurt walked over and pulled Blaine from the bed. "Thats ok, I hope you'll let me borrow them some other time" he said kissing Blaine's lips lightly. He sighed again and said simply "You make me so happy"
FUCK MY LIFE!
Blaine couldn't even look at Kurt. He was sure if he did he would break completely. He would either kill him on the spot and end his misery or he would crumble down and beg for Kurt to take him all of him, the human, the bad and the evil. So he just kissed Kurt's cheek, not looking at him and said "You make me happy too"
That wasn't a lie. It was just...Inconvenience.
Blaine drove Kurt back to the manor and walked in with him. Why you ask? Oh maybe it would piss Piper's pony tail off when she sees them together. If he couldn't get her to trust him he was going to do the same thing she did to him-annoy the crap out of her.
They were sitting around the dining table, drinking coffee and Phoebe beamed at them as usual. Always beaming,
"Well, where have you guys been" she asked.
"Yes, spill it. We want all details. Dirty ones. Let us live voraciously." Paige ordered and Kurt blushed.
Phoebe jumped up and gushed out "Oh my God there are dirty details!". She didn't make it a question at all.
"Ok, that's enough out of you. Let him breathe" Piper said.
Well, that's new Kurt thought but said nothing to her words.
Wyatt came running towards him and grabbed his leg. "Uncy Kurt" the boy said in his tiny voice. Kurt reached down and picked him up "Well hello there big guy. Did you miss me?" he asked.
"No Uncy Kurt at sleepy time" boy said.
Oh God Blaine thought.
Fuck what the sisters will feel. How the hell could he take Kurt away from that little boy?
"I'm sorry buddy, I had...Issues" he said looking at Piper. "Why don't we go get some munchies, what do you say?" he asked Wyatt.
The little boy let out a throaty "Yes" before clasping his hands together.
Kurt turned to Blaine and said "I'll be back in five" before placing a light kiss on his lips. He left and Phoebe and Paige just looked at each other and Phoebe said "We're just gonna go and...Pretend we have something better to do"
Blaine and Piper were left alone.
Well, this should be fun, Blaine thought.
Piper was just looking at him. Just eyeing him like she didn't know what exactly to say. So he decided to lay the cards on the table. He was still standing and took his hands out of his pockets.
"Ok, here's the deal. You don't like me and quite frankly, I don't like you either. You are annoying as hell and when you talk I just wanna pull my arm out just so I have something to throw at you. But guess what? I'm not going anywhere Piper. So you can glare at me all you want and send daggers in my direction, I don't give a fuck. We have one thing in common. Kurt. That's all. We hate each other but we both love Kurt so why don't you just suck it up the same way I do so we can learn to bear with each other."
Piper gasped at him, stood up and walked to stand face to face with Blaine, their eyes digging into each other and said "We both what..?" but she never finished that line"
A few things happened at the same time.
Wyatt came running from the kitchen, smiling and Kurt was chasing after him, making grabby hands at him and giggling like a school girl. Paige and Piper were laughing behind Kurt as they walked into the room. On their left a demon appeared and for split second he seemed genuinely shocked with the amount of people in the room. He collected himself and swiftly waved his hand at the boys direction, sending an energy ball towards him.
Blaine's brain was working 200ml/h.
He heard Piper scream and wave her hands at the demon.
Did she wave toward Blaine?
She didn't wave towards Blaine.
He couldn't act like he was frozen.
It was like everything was in slow motion. Blaine saw the ball flying towards the boy and he saw Kurt inches from the baby.
NO!His brain was screaming.
Before he could even register the action, he threw himself across the room, first pushing Kurt with one hand before he protectively wrapped his other hand around the boy, turning his back towards the incoming emery ball and shielding the boy. The ball hit him. Holy hell that hurt. Luckily it only grazed his shoulder.
Take the blow, take the blow, take the blow. Blaine told himself. This will go a lot easier if I pretended to be unconscious while they sort this mess out. The boy orbed from his arms and Blaine saw a flash of blue light land next to Kurt.
The bloody connection the boy had with Kurt was gonna be a problem.
Kurt and Phoebe screamed at the same time. Kurt's scream was Blaine's name and Phoebe just screamed "Piper watch out"
There was another scream and Piper yelled at the demon again "Stay away from my son, you son of a bitch" before she waved her hands in his direction, sending him flying into the wall. But he didn't blow up. There was disgusting stench in the room as a huge, reddish wound appeared on his chest. Kurt collected himself and jumped up taking Wyatt with him. He reached Blaine and placed the boy next to Blaine's apparently unconscious body.
"Wyatt, shield" he looked at the small boy . Wyatt blinked but as always when Kurt talked to him he understood perfectly. He released his shield and covered both his and Blaine's body.
"Good boy" Kurt faked a smile at the boy and rushed forward. Paige was orbing every single solid object that could make damage into demons direction but he was evading every single attack. Kurt waved his hands at the cabinet in the corner that contained their potions bottles, sending it trembling to the floor. The cabinet crashed with a bang and its content spilled over.
Kurt started waving his hand again, sending the bottles at the demon but only every fifth hit him, and making burning noises but not killing the demon.
Blaine rolled his eyes on the floor. This was it. He saw the demon. They were going to have to tell him their "secret" Blaine smiled devilishly. Oh this will be so much fun. He can act all shocked. And surprised. Hurt. Betrayed. Maybe he can even shed a tear. Should he cry? He thought for a second. Then he smiled for real, like anyone will notice with all the havoc going on. Oh yes, he'll cry. But he was once again getting bored. Come on people, lets get this show on the road already.
There were loud noises behind him and then one of the sisters, Phoebe judging by the scream, was sent flying through the air.
Oh enough already, Blaine thought.
He risked turning his head on the floor looking at the demon. Blaine's eyes changed to that pitch black and then fire was roaring through them. Demon seemed to flinch for a second and then looked at the body on the floor.
His eyes went wide in horror and in that same moment Kurt sent a bottle with velvet colored liquid straight to his face.
That's my boy Blaine thought.
Demon screamed in pain and then looked at Blaine again. Blaine used the opportunity to show his teeth at him in a silent growl and demon bowed for a second before he shimmered away.
"What the hell was that" Piper said pointing to the place where demon was not a second ago. "It took all of us to even hurt him. That was no ordinary demon"
Kurt scooted back to Blaine's unmoving form and yelled at her "I don't care about the damn demon, less talking more healing over here" Wyatt lowered his shield. Kurt pulled Blaine into his lap as carefully as he could and screamed again
"Paige God damn it, get your ass over here"
The worry in Kurt's voice almost made Blaine open his eyes. Almost. It took all his self-control not to just jump up and assure Kurt that he's fine. But he had a role to play. And damn him if he wasn't gonna play it perfectly.
Paige kneeled down on the floor and placed her hands inch or two above the wound on Blaine's back. Silvery light was coming out of her hands and the mark on Blaine's back was healing fast. Blaine laughed internally. This is where his human side came in handy. Paige could heal any human, good or evil and that's exactly what she was doing. She was healing his human self. Blaine's demonic half was strong as hell and little lousy energy ball couldn't hurt him much. There will probably just be a little red spot there for day or two.
Time to put up a show Blaine thought before slowly blinking his eyes open.
"Wh...What happened" he asked drowsily?
The four of them just looked at each other but no one said anything. Blaine lifted himself in sitting position and asked again "What was that thing? What was that thing he threw at Wyatt? What are you people?" he asked wide eyed.
That's right, freak out any human would...
Kurt raised his hands up, as if he was surrendering, as is he was showing Blaine that he won't hurt him...Poor, sweet Kurt, if he only knew.
"We're not gonna hurt you Blaine, please just let me explain" Kurt asked but there was so much insecurity in his eyes.
Blaine backed away some more "Explain what? What the hell is there to explain? You have ...Creatures appearing in your house out of thin air and try to kill your nephew" Blaine screamed in faked horror.
Kurt reached out for his hand and there were tears in his eyes."Please Blaine, please let me explain. I can explain everything. Just give me the chance"
Blaine wasn't expecting Kurt's tears to hurt so much. He paused for just a sec and Kurt saw his opportunity.
So he started talking. He knew pretending was over. He knew he couldn't hide it anymore. He wanted Blaine to know. He orbed so many times in a middle of something with Blaine and Blaine was always too kind to ask for explanation. Blaine deserved to know the truth. He planned on telling him eventually. Just not like this. And after what Blaine did today...He throw himself in front of an energy ball , not even knowing what it is or what can it do, to save Wyatt. To save someone Kurt loved more than his own life. Now more than ever, Kurt knew that Blaine was the one. So he talked. Charmed Ones. Powers. Demons. Warlocks. Twice blessed child. Angels. Underworld. Everything.
Blaine listened occasionally letting out a noise of understanding or just acted surprise. This was again kinda boring. He knew all this. But he listened carefully planned what to do next. He had to make a scene. No one could accept this without freaking out. So he will freak. Call Kurt liar. Names. Scream at Piper, he'll love that part. After almost half an hour Kurt finished his story.
Blaine was just staring at him and when Kurt reached to take his hand he snatched it back and picked himself of the floor in a second.
"You stay away from me." he spat the words at Kurt.
Kurt got off the floor but hung his head. Piper stepped closer to Blaine but he backed away.
"We're not going to hurt you. I never wanted you to find out. Not like this. Or at all for that matter" she said simply.
She might not like the guy but he just stared at the face of death to save her son. Well, to save Kurt's nephew.
She might not trust Blaine but Wyatt protected him and Wyatt was never wrong before.
She might think a lot of things but she also knew that Kurt loved Blaine. That much was evident since the moment he walked through that door this morning. Something has definitely changed between them. Last night changed something. Maybe she didn't know what but in a strange way she was grateful. Blaine cared for Kurt and he wasn't willing to let him suffer. So he saved what Kurt treasured the most in this world. He saved her son.
And with that he proved himself worthy in her eyes.
"Oh you didn't want me to know, did you? Guess what, fire thrower, I didn't want to know. And you", he said pointing at Kurt, "how dare you drag me in the middle of all of this? You had no right to bring me into this! I don't care which side you play for. You're nothing but a liar. Was anything you ever told me true?" He asked but it was more or a scream than a question.
Kurt lifted his head and his eyes were glistening with tears. "Blaine" he whispered.
"Don't you Blaine me. And you can keep your crocodile tears, they don't work on me anymore. I trusted you Kurt. And all you ever did was lie to me. You think I can trust those tears? You think I can trust they are real?" Blaine asked.
Ok, this was downright cruel.
Blaine was throwing at Kurt's face everything he knew Kurt would say to him if Kurt ever found the truth about him. Who was Blaine to talk about lies when everything he ever said or did with Kurt was a lie? Well, not everything but most of it...
Time for the showstopper...
"All I ever wanted was to make you happy. I thought you wanted the same for me" Blaine said, a single tear falling from his eye.
Brilliant timing.
And there it was. The moment when Kurt's heart broke in half. He could see it in Kurt's face. Tears were streaming down his cheeks and he was trying to say something but his voice wasn't working. Except that, what could he say? Blaine was right. He shouldn't be in the middle of this. Kurt was living in a lie. He knew the second Blaine found about the whole bloody Charmed universe he'd be out the door. So he kept putting it off. And now he hit a wall. He crashed and burned. Simple as that.
I'm so sorry Kurt, but I have to. You have to be under my command if I want this to ever work..I have to Kurt, forgive me.
Time to storm out. The curtain falls.
"I don't want to see you ever again. I have enough liars in my life already. You can keep your twisted world to yourself. You can have your demons and your magic but you can't have me." Blaine said and with those words he really did storm out the door.
Kurt let out a choked sob and fell to his knees. Darkness covered all. The curtain really did fall. And covered every single ray of hope Kurt ever had of waking up in Blaine's arms again.
Hours later he was still crying in his room, he couldn't even get himself to change out of those clothes he was wearing for two days now. And that was saying something. His sisters were next to him, holding him close and Phoebe was crying with him...With her new empathy power, out of practice of course, she could feel Kurt's pain more than anyone else. But more than his pain, she could feel his love. All consuming, gut wrenching love he had for Blaine. Her brother gave his heart to a man that called him a liar and told him he never wants to see him again. Kurt's sobs were hurting her soul. She wanted to help him so bad but she couldn't. She just didn't know how.
Kurt's eyes were red and swollen but he saw a bright blue light appear on the bed, right next to him. Wyatt looked at Kurt, laid his beautiful blond head next to Kurt's wet cheek and started crying himself. He might not understand what's going on he knew his Kurt was hurting. And Kurt was his everything.
"Why cry Uncy Kurt" the boy asked pouting his teary face at Kurt.
Kurt just looked at him and then pulled the boy closer, crying even harder into his blond curls. Wyatt cried along with him. Kurt's already broken heart was smashed into the pieces at the sight. His pain he could handle. But Wyatt's...He simply couldn't handle that. Nothing in his whole life hurt him like Wyatt's tears. Wyatt's tears for him. When the boy reached his chubby hand to pet Kurt's hair Kurt let out a sound like a wounded animal. Pain like this shouldn't be experienced. He wouldn't wish this on his worst enemy.
Piper got up, wiped her eyes and barked "Enough! You have to go and talk to him. I don't care if I have to go and hunt him down but he has to listen to you" . This was killing her. The sight of Kurt's and Wyatt's tears for each other is a sight no mother should ever have to see.
"He doesn't want to have anything to do with me. He was very clear about that" Kurt said between two sobs.
"Then you have to be CLEAR about how you feel about him. No one can stay immune to that kind of love Kurt. Just go and talk to him. Try one more time. I can't stand to look at you like this" Paige said blowing her nose.
He was still crying and he wasn't making any indication that he will ever stop.
Piper knew it was time to play dirty. She leaned over to Kurt and said "If you won't do it for yourself do it for Wyatt. He can't stand to see you in pain. Look what this is doing to him. Your pain is his pain Kurt".
Kurt lifted his eyes to look at that petite face he loved more than anything in the world. The face of a little boy he loved more than his own life. The boy who was only two but was crying next to him, trying to comfort him and soothe his pain. He'd do anything for Wyatt. Even get the bloody remains of his heart smeared all over Blaine's fancy penthouse.
For Wyatt, he will do whatever it takes.
"Who's driving me?" he said barely audible before he kissed the boy again.
He couldn't sleep that night. He couldn't even get himself to go to the underworld. Damn human side was feeling guilty. The pain in Kurt's eyes was tearing him apart.
"Come on Kurt, show up already" he said out loud.
He was waiting for Kurt to show up, just like he hoped he would. He had to know that Kurt would go the distance for him.
Come on Kurt...
Everything he planned was relying on Kurt's need, affection, love, devotion, call it whatever the fuck you want, for Blaine.
Somewhere in the back music was playing but Blaine couldn't really hear it...
If Kurt shows up, he's got him completely. Last test Kurt has to pass.
But it's been hours and...Nothing...Blaine was getting worried.
He was so lost in his thought that he didn't even hear the bell ring the first time. But he heard the second one.
Kurt.
Blaine opened the door and...His heart sank lower than ever. Kurt was crying. Again. He looked like he was crying for hours. He looked like something inside him died since Blaine last saw him.
Too much. It hurt too much.
And just like that, not waiting for Kurt to say anything Blaine pulled him into his arms and whispered into his ear "Everything I said...It didn't come out right Kurt. I'm sorry. I freaked out. I did. It was just too much. But when I see you cry it makes me want to die. I don't care what you are. I don't care about anything other than being with you"
He was scared how much truth there was in his words. He wanted for all of it to be true.
And just like that, with those few words Kurt was healed. Blaine still wanted him in his life. He still wanted all the love Kurt wanted to give him. He wanted him. Despite all the sneaking and despite Kurt hiding the truth from him Blaine still wanted him. Kurt lifted his head and those beautiful blue eyes looked at Blaine hazel one's.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't know how. I wanted you to know, you have to believe me. I never wanted to lie, ever. You have to believe me Blaine." Kurt wasn't crying anymore but his voice was dripping with pain.
"No, Kurt, I'm sorry I'm the villain of the story" It felt like such a relief to say those words even if they weren't said in the right context. It was still true.
Blaine was the villain.
He played this whole thing.
Planned to break Kurt's will.
To break all his defenses.
"Weaken them and you will weaken the book" Seer's words were echoing in his head.
"I'm sorry about all things I said to you. And I know I can't take it back" Blaine said again.
And there was a part of him that REALLY was sorry. He hated to see that hurt look in Kurt's eyes. He couldn't even imagine how much it will hurt when death comes to them from Blaine's hands. And he was just tired. He felt like he was older than time itself. And Kurt was right there, being all warm and sweet and forgiving. He treated him like crap and look at him, welcoming him back into his arms without a question. And he will have to...How will he ever be able to kill that man with arms so willing to hold someone as despicable as Blaine?
"I'm so lost Kurt" Blaine choked out, it was almost a whisper.
And those words were the ones that described him completely.
He was lost.
He lost his grounds.
He lost his will.
He lost his mind.
Kurt placed the gentlest of kisses on his jaw. "You're not lost. I understand how you feel. I would've reacted the same. It's lot to take in. But when you said all those things...I thought I lost you Blaine. I can't...I can't lose you...You mean everything to me" Kurt said with such positivity that Blaine stepped beck.
He eyed Kurt for a long moment.
You mean everything to me...Kurt said.
I'm such a monster, Blaine thought. He was sick of himself. He had to make Kurt feel better.
He had to. He knows he shouldn't but he HAD to.
He reached out and cupped Kurt's face. He traced his thumb over Kurt's cheekbone and sighed. "You are..."
What the hell could he say? You're everything to me to?! That was another lie. Kurt was...something. More than...Just more. But he couldn't say that. Maybe he could say the truth.
"You are the most amazing person I have ever met Kurt. You're everything that is good in this world. I don't deserve you, weird magic involved or not. I think about how we came all this way and I can't believe you want me. You could do so much better Kurt" Blaine said.
He had no idea where all of this was coming from but he was secretly hoping Kurt would get it. He hoped Kurt would understand and run away. Or push Blaine away. It was selfish really. If Kurt ran it would be easier for Blaine to kill him. If Kurt pushed him he wouldn't feel this bad about ending him.
He would feel bad but not this bad.
"I love how you kiss. I love all your sounds. I love how much you care. I love how you wrinkle your nose when you concentrate enough. I love the warmth I feel within your touch" Blaine paused.
He leaned closer and kissed Kurt gently. "Nothing prepared me for the privilege of being yours Kurt"
Everything in Kurt's world fell back into place.
The world shifted and he could feel his heart hammering inside his chest.
Blaine..His Blaine was saying all those things to him. The man that captivated his every thought since he saw him for the first time. That man was saying he felt privileged to be loved by Kurt. Kurt's head was spinning. He felt intoxicated by Blaine.
He found Blaine's mouth and kissed him with a fire that could melt an iceberg. Blaine was everything right now. Blaine's acceptance of who he was. Blaine's words. Blaine's lips on his own.
Please God, don't let him back down now...Kurt thought.
Kurt licked Blaine's bottom lip, pushing his tongue between his teeth and Blaine accepted the intrusion willingly. Kurt was holding onto Blaine like he might disappear at any moment. Kurt moaned lightly when their tongues intertwined and the animal inside Blaine growled. He grabbed Kurt's thighs and hoisted him up. Kurt yelped and wrapped his legs around Blaine's waist.
"Please Blaine" Kurt moaned when Blaine bit down on his neck.
"What do you want angel?" Blaine asked looking into those blue oceans.
Kurt shivered and closed his eyes for a second. He then kissed Blaine again and said against his mouth" You. I want only you Blaine"
That wasn't a wish. That came out as a plea. Like Kurt has never wanted anything more than he wanted Blaine. He couldn't be sure, of course. He couldn't know about Kurt. But he knew about himself.
The dam was broken and the flood would either cleanse him or drown him.
At this point he couldn't even care. Kurt was kissing him with so much passion that he felt his bones turn to jelly. How can anyone put so much love and desire into one simple kiss? Did it really matter? Blaine was too far gone...
"I'll give you anything you want" Blaine whispered before kissing Kurt again.
He took Kurt to the bedroom and placed him on the warm cushions.
This was happening.
This was really happening.
Not a dream or a fantasy.
Actually fucking happening.
He slid his finger down the side of Kurt's face. The same face that had haunted his dreams for months.
Kurt shivered, His eyes fell shut and he leaned his head into the touch.
So responsive.
Kurt is responding to the beast touching him and he does it so willingly.
At this point Blaine becomes vaguely aware of the song coming from the stereo and he laughs at how perfectly appropriately inappropriate it is.
Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid
To fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt
Suddenly goes away somehow
One step closer...
Up until this point he had just wanted to get this over with and put his subconscious at ease. But now that he's here, he can feel the overwhelming need to take his time. He knows this is dangerous territory. His demon side wanting to take over. His human side wanting to give in. He can't help it though. He can't bring himself to care about the danger anymore. Kurt has cast a spell on him, one that has no counter, no defense, only surrender.
He trails his hands down Kurt's shirt, opening buttons and leaving goose bumps in the wake of his fingertips. And Kurt lets him, trusting him completely. The feeling of control is intoxicating to Blaine and he revels in it. Kurt's body is fucking amazing. Smooth porcelain skin over lean toned muscle. He just wants to drink him in. He moves his mouth expertly over Kurt's neck, lingering at his pulse point, delighting in the hitches in Kurt's breathing and the whimpers he makes.
"You are gorgeous." Blaine whispers.
I have died everyday
waiting for you
Darlin' don't be afraid
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I'll love you for a
Thousand more
The damn song fits so perfectly that Blaine thinks fate is mocking him again. In a different time, in a different place, he would wait for Kurt...He would wait for Kurt forever. He would give anything if he could change Kurt's fate. If he could keep him. Or at least if he wouldn't be the one ending the life Kurt so recklessly placed in his hands.
And Kurt is drowning in the sensation of Blaine's hands on him. Before Kurt can even process what is happening fully, his shirt is gone, and so is his belt… Damn, his pants just dropped. He can't think. Because Blaine is doing amazing things to his neck… And arms… And chest…
"Blaine…" He groans out the name when he feels Blaine's tongue wrap around his nipple. He's squirming. And they haven't reached anywhere yet. Why does Blaine have this effect on him? He feels so helpless, but deliciously so. He's ready to drown in this passion. Hold off on restrictions… Because this is the man who has consistently swept him off his feet on every encounter. He can't seem to bring himself to stop this. He wants this. Bad. He needs Blaine more than he needs air.
He feels Blaine on top of him and he instinctively wraps his arms around Blaine's neck and legs around his It's such a huge turn on along with all the inexplicable sensations his body was already experiencing.
God! Where has Blaine been all my life?
He feels the slide of his briefs coming off; releasing the pressure he was feeling on his dick. He opens his eyes and realizes that Blaine still had his clothes on. Well, that's not fair.
"Do you want me to do that?" He said, his hand reaching out for Blaine's shirt. He isn't surprised that his voice is breathless.
Blaine gave him a smile and allowed him to pull his shirt off.
This might feel slightly different but this is still them.
Kurt teasing Blaine and Blaine responding.
Blaine teasing Kurt and Kurt responding.
Feeling is so new and yet so familiar at the same time.
Feels like they have been doing this forever.
Kurt looks at him with hunger in his eyes. Blaine's body is glorious. A tanned expanse of compact muscle. Chiseled arms, chest and abs. Holy crap. He's dizzy just from looking. With all this sensory overload he just hopes he doesn't accidentally orb during his orgasm… Oh God, what if he does that?
Hunger rages inside Blaine's eyes too. Does this angel have any idea what his voice does to me? And fuck, look at him! I just wanna swallow his dick, see just how far down my throat it goes… The breathless panting Kurt is doing right now is going straight to Blaine's dick. He needs to get these damn pants off before he suffocates! As if Kurt is reading his mind, he quickly unbuckles Blaine's belt and slides his pants down, down, down… Blaine steps out of his pants and looks at Kurt. Kurt has his fingers on the waist of Blaine's boxer briefs. He looks at Blaine until their eyes meet. Then he slowly pulls down the briefs.
SHIT.
This is some déjà vu. This is exactly how dream Kurt looks at him while doing this. First similarity he finds between the two of them.
"Oh dear," Kurt says as he eyes him. "My, my."
His dick hardens even more. A feat he thought was impossible moments ago. He steps out of his briefs, takes a deep breath and tries to remember if there are condoms and lube in the drawer at his bedside. He could just conjure them. But he's pretty sure that would freak Kurt out if sex supplies came out of nowhere in a haze of fire beside them. Yep I think he would freak out.
Blaine opens the drawer and finds that he is well stocked. Well stocked indeed. I bet this is Drake's doing, in his mission to get him laid. Blaine looks over to see Kurt lying out on his bed… Magnificent. He'd have to find some way to repay Drake for this one… He brings the supplies to the bed and climbs over Kurt. Kurt spreads his legs to accommodate him. So fucking gorgeous. He looks Kurt in the eyes and devours his mouth, trying to convey things he wants to say but can't, can't even admit to himself. He coats his fingers with the lube and rubs them together, warming it. He never breaks eye contact with Kurt, he doesn't want to.
"Just, tell me if I'm hurting you, okay?" He doesn't even recognize his voice in that moment; it was too soft, too tender...
He circles Kurt's entrance with a finger and as gently as he can, he slides it in. Kurt winces at the slight burn, but never takes his eyes off Blaine, he feels like they're having a silent conversation with their eyes. Like right now, he thinks Blaine's eyes are asking
'Am I hurting you? Do you want to stop?'
There's also something else there that he can't decipher yet. So he does is best to portray 'No, keep going, I'm fine. Just don't stop. Don't ever stop.'
Blaine seemed to get the message, because he starts moving faster and Kurt can no longer be silent. His moans seep through the apartment and seem to be spurring Blaine on.
"Mo-ore." Kurt choked out, and Blaine obliges. He puts more lube on his fingers and enters two fingers into Kurt. Kurt quickly adjusts to the burn of two fingers. He knows what is coming is way bigger than two fingers. Just then Blaine's fingers bend at the right angle and sends undiluted pleasure through Kurt's body.
"Fuck!" Kurt let's out and his eyes squeeze shut for the first time since they're on the bed. Blaine's eyes immediately darken and fire roars through them. He can feel it. Power surging inside him. He wills it away. Before Kurt notices.
Kurt opens his eyes to see why Blaine has stopped moving. Blaine is looking at him, astonished.
"I've just never heard you curse before." Kurt chuckles and brings Blaine's face in for an intense all consuming kiss. Blaine leans in and starts moving his fingers again. Kurt lets out a moan right into Blaine's mouth. Blaine groans, he can't wait to be inside this angel. He slides in three fingers without breaking the kiss and swallows Kurt's cry from the change. He's moving earnestly now. The need to breathe overwhelms them and they part, breathing each other's air.
"Please," Kurt says, "now. I'm ready."
He makes eye contact again with Kurt.
'Are you sure?' The eyes question him.
'Absolutely.' Kurt portrays.
Blaine sits up a bit to put the condom on and apply the lube. He lifts Kurt's legs and put them over his shoulders. His dick slides against Kurt's earning a groan from him and a whimper from Kurt. He lines up with Kurt's entrance and very, very slowly pushes into Kurt. Past the tight ring of muscle, slowly going deeper, mustering up all the self-control in the world to not force his entire length in at one time. Kurt feels amazing around him, too amazing. Like "how is he even real?" amazing.
Eye contact again. He's not even weirded out by it. It's like they've evolved their own language in a matter of a few hours. Something sacred to them. Blaine is on emotional overload.
'Are you ok?'
'Perfect actually.'
'Good.' Blaine lets out a relived sigh.
'You can move now.' Kurt portrays along with a nod.
As soon as Blaine moves, shock waves emanates from that one point of entry to every fiber of Kurt's being. He feels Blaine right down to his fingertips. He holds on to him for fear of splitting into a million pieces as Blaine enters again and again. Blaine drives into him with vigor and purpose. Power. Blaine shifts his angle and hits that spot that makes Kurt keen and arch right up into him. And he never wants to let go, can't seem to get enough. Doesn't even realize he's chanting "more, more" and that the more he says "more", the more Blaine gives.
Kurt feels so tight, so, so good. Perfect. Just perfect. And he doesn't want to leave; he wants to stay here forever. Right here. He doesn't want the complications he knows this will bring. He doesn't want to have to deal with any of it. He just wants to be here, with his angel… Kurt is moving his hips along with him now and the motion is tantalizingly good. The whole world is muted and all he can hear are Kurt's moans and quiet whimpers and sharp intakes of breath. Everything is Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, and nothing ever felt more right than this does now… He's on the edge. He feels it. And he knows Kurt is close too. He hits that spot inside Kurt again and Kurt shivers more violently than ever before.
"Blaine!" Kurt cries as he comes between them; eyes squeezed shut and holding on to Blaine for dear life as euphoria rushes through him. For a second he thought he saw a flash of fire in Blaine's eyes, like real fire but at this point he might as well be seeing pink fluffy unicorns and he wouldn't find it strange. He feels the urge to orb, but he digs his fingers into Blaine's back to ground himself.
"Kurt." Blaine groans out as he comes seconds after all the emotions rushing through him that he can't handle. This time his eyes do go pitch black and the fire bursts inside. Thank God Kurt's eyes are tightly shut cause this would freak the hell out of him.
And this is what the Seer was talking about. This danger. It doesn't matter that his powers are stronger than Kurt's. Because with Kurt he has something that brings Gods to their knees and causes mortals to sink to the deepest abyss or rise high above the clouds. He can't even deny it to himself. It's there now. He doesn't think he wants to get rid of it at this point. There's no way he can get rid of it.
He rolls off Kurt and settles on his side. Kurt automatically curls into him with the most contented sigh he's ever heard. He puts his arms around him and kisses his hair. Because it feels right. Because he wants to.
Kurt wants to scream "I love you" at the top of his voice but he knows that would probably scare Blaine. So he settles for the next best thing. "You make me so happy Blaine" he says as he places his head on Blaine's chest.
Blaine fights it. He fights it hard but his mouth seems to have a mind of his own.
"You make me happy too" he answers.
Kurt smiles so wide that it hurt a little. Blaine smiles back and holds Kurt tighter.
What the fuck is he going to do now?
