Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine. Also: Yay! A long(er) chapter! Or is that more like, "yay?" Lol. I hope you guys enjoy it, either way!
Lily sat next to James in front of Professor McGonagall's desk in her office. She was speechless. She hadn't been able to say anything since James had spoken those awful words: "Hogsmeade's been attacked." Thinking about it sent a wave of nausea through her, and she tried desperately to control it.
McGonagall stood behind her desk and observed the two of them. Her hair, which was always meticulous, was coming out of its would-be neat bun. There was a smudge of dirt across one of her flushed cheeks and the fire in her eyes seemed barely contained.
"Now," she said, clipping her words in an impatient manner, "I'm sure the two of you are wondering why I'm here talking to you instead of attending to the students who were involved in the attack."
She had a point. As paralyzed with shock and fear as Lily's mind was, she did notice that McGonagall's presence here was a little odd.
"I can assure you," she continued, pacing behind her desk, "that I, too, feel it is my duty to administer to the students. However, Professor Dumbledore has given me strict instructions that I am to address the two of you, first and foremost."
Lily didn't understand what was going on; not any of it. She looked over at James sitting next to her for... she wasn't sure what. Comfort? Reassurance? Whatever it was, he didn't provide it. He sat, stone-faced, looking straight ahead. She noticed, though, that he didn't meet McGonagall's eyes, either.
Lily opened her mouth and, for the first time since James had told her the news, she felt like she might be able to speak. Like she might be able to ask the question that had been pounding against the walls of her mind, eager to escape.
"Professor," she started quietly, her voice sounding strange in her own ears. "Is-is anyone hurt?" Lily looked away in embarrassment as soon as the words left her mouth. What a stupid question. Of course people were hurt. She saw James finally glance at her out of the corner of her eye. "I mean," she continued, lamely, "is everyone alright?"
The impatience in McGonagall's features softened, and she looked at Lily with sympathy. "Yes, Ms. Evans," she said reassuringly, "everyone will be fine. Several students sustained injuries," she conceded. "But nothing that Madam Pomfrey can't correct."
A heady sense of relief swept through her as McGonagall said the words. Her body still hummed uncomfortably with adrenaline and anxiety, but the nausea, at least, subsided. There was one more thing she had to ask, though.
"Is Alice okay?" She gave Professor McGonagall a hopeful look.
However, McGonagall did not return it. She wouldn't meet Lily's eyes. Lily's heart stopped beating. James turned his head toward her and she gave him a pleading look. "What happened?" she demanded.
James looked away from her face and began, "Lily-"
"No!" she cut him off. "Tell me what happened!" Panic seized her and she looked frantically back at McGonagall, who finally gave her a steady gaze in return. Lily tried to find comfort in that.
"Alice is alright, Lily," she told her. "She's going to be fine."
Lily couldn't help the happiness that came over her at the thought, but she quenched it quickly. She had to know. "What happened?" she repeated.
McGonagall looked at her for a moment before saying, "Alice was hit with a Cruciatus curse."
Lily's mind went blank and, for a moment, she felt dead inside. However, that moment passed quickly and suddenly she was standing, ready to leave. She had to see Alice. Her friend needed her, and she would be damned if she was just going to sit around with the two of them and discuss it calmly.
"Ms. Evans," Professor McGonagall said sternly, "We are not finished here."
"I don't care," Lily shot back, making her way to the door. And she didn't. The only thing on her mind now was Alice.
"Wait," McGonagall said, and the tone in her voice made Lily stop and look back at her. "Trust me when I say that I understand what you're feeling right now, Lily. The students of this school, and especially those in Gryffindor house, are my responsibility. I'm just as frustrated as you are that we have to be here, instead, but it is something that must be done. As Head Boy and Girl, it's important that you be one of the first to know when things change at this school. We need to discuss the new safety precautions, and the sooner we get this conversation over with, the sooner we can begin enforcing them."
Lily listened to her, feeling torn. Her desire to find Alice warred with her duty as Head Girl, and she didn't know what to do.
"It will only take a few minutes once we get started," said McGonagall, persuasively. "You can see Ms. Hinton as soon as we're done here."
Lily glanced over at James. He caught her gaze and held it. He'd yet to say a word since he told her what had happened, but the look he gave her now was so full of them that she couldn't begin to understand its meaning. All she knew was that the intensity of his gaze knocked the breath out of her and momentarily made her forget what she was doing, and why she was upset.
Drawing closer, she held his gaze until she sat back down next to him. Finally, she turned her eyes back to Professor McGonagall, who simply looked at the two of them for a moment.
"Thank you," she said softly, addressing Lily. "Now," she continued, "there are just a couple of things that you two need to know."
Lily focused her attention as best she could on McGonagall, reminding herself that the sooner they got through this, the sooner she could go see Alice.
"First," McGonagall began, "a new curfew will be enforced. All students will now be required to be in their houses by 7:00 pm, sharp." Lily saw James shift next to her, like he wanted to protest, but he kept silent. "No exceptions," she added sternly, also noticing James's reaction.
"More importantly, however," she continued seriously, "is that we will be implementing a new partner system."
Lily just stared at her, confused. After a moment of silence, she asked, "I'm sorry, Professor, but... I don't understand, exactly. What do you mean by 'partner system'?"
Professor McGonagall glanced at her and said, "Well, given the state of things, students are no longer allowed to wander about the castle by themselves. From this point on, all students will be assigned a partner, in addition to being escorted to classes by a professor, to ensure that there is never an excuse to be caught around the school alone."
Lily gaped at her in shock.
"You can't be serious," James said indignantly, speaking up for the first time. Lily glanced over and saw that he was giving McGonagall an incredulous look. And, for once, she had to agree with him.
Professor McGonagall gave him a foreboding look, and an uneasy shudder went though Lily. She'd never seen McGonagall look so... fierce. "I can assure you that I take the safety of the students here very seriously, Mr. Potter. You would do well to do the same."
James stared at her for a moment more before looking away, beaten. Lily couldn't help but to admire McGonagall's intensity; she really did care for the students. She still agreed with James, though, about this "partner" thing. There was no way it would work.
"I'm well aware," Professor McGonagall continued, her tone a bit lighter now, "that this plan is unpractical. And, frankly, I find it unrealistic. But something must be done, and this is the easiest, most painless, way to do it. Now, all students will be assigned partners except the seventh years; they will be allowed to choose their own."
Lily breathed a small sigh of relief at that. She didn't want to think about how awful it would be to be paired up with someone she couldn't stand.
"I wouldn't get too comfortable with that thought, however," McGonagall said, warningly. "As a matter of convenience, all Prefects will automatically be paired together. So, the two of you will be each other's partners."
"What?" Lily asked, loudly. It came out more harshly than she meant it to, but she couldn't help it. She was forced to be around James enough as it was just by living with him. But being forced to be in their rooms by 7:00 every night? How did McGonagall expect her to get anything done?
"That's ridiculous!" James said, from beside her. "You can't honestly expect me to spend all my time with her?"
Lily had to admit, she was a little offended by that statement, and she threw a sharp glare his way.
Realizing what he'd said, James gave Lily an apologetic look. He hadn't meant his thoughts to come out as insulting as they had. He just didn't see how McGonagall could think they'd be able to enforce the stupid rule, when he and Lily would no doubt be too busy at each other's throats.
James had to admit that it had been easier, lately, sharing a dorm and classes with Lily, but that was mainly because he was never really around her. For the past few weeks, she had been running off to the library every day, coming back right at curfew and going straight to her room. So, of course they'd been getting along. But if he was going to have to spend all of his time with her... he didn't know how that was supposed to be a pleasant experience. Especially now that there seemed to be a particularly disturbing development between her and that Josh git. He already knew that he couldn't stand the twat and, annoyed, he realized that spending more time around her would probably equal having to spend more time around him, as well.
If McGonagall really values her students' safety so much, then she had better think twice about this, James thought to himself.
"No, Mr. Potter," McGonagall said impatiently, "I don't expect either of you to spend all of your time together. To do so would be impractical and inappropriate. But you two will have to spend more time around each other than usual, just like all the other students. It's the easiest way to pair you up, seeing as you are already required, as Heads, to perform numerous duties together."
James sat back and tried not to roll his eyes. He had to admit that what she said was logical and true, but it was still one of the dumbest things he'd ever heard. There was no point going against her, though; he saw that. He looked over at Lily and saw that she wore an exasperated expression. However, he saw worry there, too, as he noticed her eyes flick toward the door every few seconds. With a sinking feeling in his stomach, he realized that he was being incredibly inconsiderate. He was drawing out this process by arguing, when he knew that all Lily wanted to do was leave and go see Alice. There were bigger things here than his annoyance at their situation, and the guilt he felt shut him up.
"Now," McGonagall continued, "I just want to go over a couple of last, small details..."
James tried to listen, but he was suddenly finding it hard to concentrate. The screams of his classmates from earlier that day began to echo in his ears, and visions of students and people from the village running through the streets filled his sight. It came upon him so unexpectedly that he couldn't stop it. He didn't know what to do. He tried telling himself that it hadn't been that bad. No one was killed, after all. But no matter what he told himself, he couldn't shake it; the cold feeling in his chest. He tried to take deep breaths and stay calm, but it only seemed to be getting worse.
"James." He heard someone say his name, and he felt a gentle touch on his arm. It was what he needed to snap out of his strange reverie. He looked over and saw Lily staring at him, her forehead wrinkled in concern. She looked like she was about to say something, but he moved his arm away from her touch and looked back at McGonagall, silently cutting her off. He didn't want her feeling sorry for him.
McGonagall gave him the same look as Lily, but he ignored it and composed his expression into indifference. After a moment, she addressed him.
"Mr. Potter, if you would escort Lily to the hospital wing to see Ms. Hinton? I want you two to begin implementing this partner system immediately."
James sighed. Honestly, the last thing he wanted was to be surrounded by all the people who'd been in Hogsmeade that day. He needed to be alone. But he guessed privacy was a luxury he no longer had.
Without another word, he stood up from his seat and walked toward the door. "Er... thanks, Professor," he heard Lily say, before she made her way over to him. He stepped out into the hallway, not looking back, and felt an odd sense of relief come over him. He hadn't realized how cramped he'd felt in McGonagall's office. But the cool air and open space of the corridor calmed him down, and he felt next to normal.
The pair of them walked quickly down the hallway. James glanced over at Lily and noticed the anxious expression on her face. It occurred to him that maybe she might want to... talk, or something. About everything that had happened. Girls usually liked talking, right?
He slowed down slightly and looked over at her. "Do you... erm... you know, want to talk about it?" he asked, awkwardly. He hoped she would say no. Merlin knew he didn't feel like talking about any of it, but he would if it would make her feel better.
Lily gave him a strained smile and shook her head. "M-maybe later. But right now, I just... I can't," she choked out. She felt close to tears, and she knew it was obvious in her voice. To her relief, James didn't press her. He simply nodded and looked back ahead, walking faster.
When they were just outside of the hospital wing, Lily couldn't hold back anymore. She ran ahead of James and searched the room frantically with her eyes for her best friend. Finally, her eyes met with Alice's, and she thought she might faint with happiness. Alice looked completely fine. She was sitting on one of the cots with her legs crossed casually in front of her. A magazine lay open on her lap, seemingly forgotten when she saw Lily had come to see her. A smile broke across Alice's face, and Lily couldn't help but smile in return. She began to make her way over, but was stopped suddenly by Madam Pomfrey.
"I'm sorry," she said, firmly," but only certain patients are allowed visitors right now."
Lily opened her mouth to protest, but before she could say anything, James spoke from behind her. "It's okay, she's here to see Alice Hinton." He nodded over to the cot where Alice sat, and she waved over at them.
"Ah," Madame Pomfrey said knowingly, "Miss Hinton, of course. Well, go on, then, she's fine." She gave the two of them a rare smile before leaving to tend to one of the other students.
Without wasting another moment, Lily rushed over to the cot where Alice was sitting and grabbed her in a tight hug. She reminded herself that Alice was okay to keep herself from crying, but a couple of tears escaped her eyes nonetheless.
Alice chuckled. "You know, I thought you'd be happy that I'm alright. But here you are trying to suffocate me."
Lily laughed in relief and let her friend go. She sat next to her on the cot. "So, you're really okay, then?" She wanted to hear her say it again.
"Yes," Alice smiled. "I'm fine. Bloody knackered and ready to get out of this room, but other than that, I'm brilliant."
"You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that," Lily said, slumping next to Alice on the cot in relief. She looked around quickly and saw that all of the other students in the wing looked well off, as well. The worst she saw were a few cuts and bruises. Which reminded her.
"Are you going to get that fixed?" she asked, turning toward James and indicating the bruise darkening around his eye. He was standing, looking a little uncomfortable, at the foot of the cot. Uncomfortable, but more like himself than she had seen him all day.
He shrugged and smirked at the two of them. "Nah, I figured I'd keep it," he said, touching the edge of the bruise. "Girls fancy guys with bruises, right? Supposed to be sexy." He winked at them with his good eye, making both Lily and Alice laugh.
"Oh, you thought I was talking about your bruise?" Lily couldn't help but tease. "No, I meant your face, in general."
Alice snorted beside her, and James gave her the first real smile she'd seen from him all day. It calmed the rest of her nerves, and she felt like herself again; like she was home. Everything was alright.
She smiled back.
"Now, Lily," Alice said, pretending to scold her and breaking her from her thoughts, "is that any way to talk to such a noble hero?"
"Alice-" James began, the smile gone from his eyes.
"Hero?" Lily interrupted. "What do you mean?" She turned toward Alice, curious.
"Nothing," James stated, before Alice could answer her.
Alice looked at him and smiled. "Modesty doesn't suit you, Potter." She turned back to Lily and began: "He was amazing, Lily. No other word for it. He... helped so many people. And Frank..."
For the first time, Lily saw a bit of what the battle had really done to Alice. Sure, she was fine on the outside. But there were other ways to hurt people... At the mention of Frank's name, Lily's heart skipped a beat. In her happiness for Alice's safety, she'd momentarily forgotten about him. She looked quickly around the room, but could see no sign of him.
"Alice, what happened? Is Frank alright? Is he...?" She didn't know what to think. Why wasn't he with them?
"No, no, he's fine," Alice assured, wiping a wayward tear from under her eye. "He's just resting in one of the private rooms. He..." She stopped, briefly, and took in a calming breath. "He got into it pretty bad with a couple of Death Eaters," she continued. Lily's heart clenched in her chest. "They cursed him a few times- I was lucky and only got the one. But he kept going after them; he kept getting up. A stupid thing to do, really," she said, but Lily saw the proud smile she wore. "They were just about to come at him again when James showed up and helped Frank fight them off." She looked at James here, and smiled gratefully, tears in her eyes.
Lily looked at James, herself, in astonishment and admiration. He met her gaze for a brief moment before looking down. He looked truly uncomfortable with the praise.
"Did..." Lily began, feeling things she didn't even know how to begin to describe. "Did you really do those things?"
James shrugged, but didn't meet her eyes.
"And more," Alice said, eagerly. "He helped get the women who didn't want to fight and all of the children of the village to safety, and-"
"That's enough, Alice," James said, sounding more harsh than he meant to. The two of them looked at him in surprise. "Just... please, don't go on." He didn't know how to describe what he was feeling. Embarrassment was definitely at the top of the list. But it was more than that. All that stuff Alice was saying... It wasn't true, somehow. Sure, the facts were there, but she said it like he was some sort of hero. And Lily was looking at him like she actually believed he was. But it wasn't true. He had been scared nearly out of his wits when the village had been attacked. Hell, even now in the hospital wing, seeing all of the students lying on their cots with cuts and bruises all over their bodies... he was scared.
Some hero I am, he thought ruefully.
"James..." he heard Lily say, and he looked up at her. He wasn't sure if he liked what he saw. There was an odd mixture of concern and wonder in her expression that made him feel uneasy. He didn't deserve any of it. He knew he was acting strange, but he couldn't help it. He didn't deserve to know that she cared enough to be worried and he definitely didn't deserve her admiration. He didn't want any of it. All he wanted at that moment was to leave; to go up to his room and be alone. But he remembered what McGonagall had said, and he staid himself. He didn't want to get either of them into trouble.
Lily stared at James as he continued to stand uncomfortably at the foot of the cot. She had never thought before that modesty was one of James's strong points, but he kept surprising her. It only made her like him more, and she thought that maybe this whole "partner system" wouldn't be so bad after all. She almost laughed to herself at the thought, though; she knew she'd be eating her words soon enough.
A/N: Okay! So, a lot of stuff going on in this chapter. It's not the longest (or the shortest, thank goodness) in this story so far, but it's pretty dense. Just a lot of... stuff, all packed in there. Lol. Well, I hope you guys liked this. I feel like it's probably kind of a weird place to end it, but I'm exhausted/it had to end somewhere/it's sort-of-not-really a cliffhanger. Hahah. This is a more introspective chapter, too. So there's not as much "action," but I hope you guys weren't too bored all the same. :P
Also, I'm sorry this took forever to update! My school life got a little crazy there for a bit, and before I knew it, almost a month had gone by between updates. I couldn't believe it! Rest assured, though, that that won't be happening again any time soon. I'm officially out for summer (thank God), so I'll have all the time in the world to work on this story. :D Thank you all for your patience, though, while I've been sorting through all this stuff. You guys are great. :)
ALSO, I've been getting a lot of reviews/PMs lately asking/telling me to get to the juicy bits between James/Lily. Lol, trust me, I'm just as impatient to get to the good bits as you guys are! But, seeing as this is a full-length fic where the two don't start out as a couple, I want to build the tension just a little bit more. Personally, I hate reading stories like this where the characters don't start out as a couple and they're shagging by the second chapter. I'm always left a little disappointed when that happens, like, "Now there's nothing to look forward to." Personally, I love a healthy dose of sexual tension/frustration while I'm reading stories, so I'm just trying to do the same for you all. Rest assured, though, that it WILL happen. And it won't be too long, now. ;) But I just love teasing you guys (and myself), what can I say? Lol.
As always, if you want to get the next chapter, REVIEW! :)
